A Life on the Run

by Sarah C, London, UK

My life (and body) were a bit of a mess in 2001 when I had an Energetic Facial Release treatment by Serge Benhayon in a beauty salon in Sydney. My friend Pauline had been to see him and she looked amazing and I wanted some! Little did I realise the impact that session would have on me and my life.

I had barely ‘managed’ the impact of my childhood sexual, physical and emotional abuse, which occurred consistently from the ages of six to ten. In fact, I’d buried it so deeply that I had completely wiped it from my memory till I was twenty-seven years old in 1995.

I had tried it all – seven years of weekly group therapy and psychotherapy sessions, Qi Gung, NLP, Reiki, all types of massage, chiropractic, past-life healing, spiritual healers, all manner of workshops, long distance running, extreme dieting, extreme eating, all types of drugs, alcohol… and still no respite from the physical and mental anguish I lived with every day.

On reflection, I honestly had no idea what was going on – crisis to drama and back again.

The lack of any faith or trust in myself meant that I ran from job to job and never really allowed anyone to get close to me. When I felt exposed, I bolted. This applied to work, and relationships with friends and lovers. I was married for only ten months in 1994 because becoming close to someone freaked me out so much. My driving belief was that if anyone saw me, they would see how flawed and awful I am.

I was bobbing around my life like a cork – inevitably from champagne – in the ocean. Totally insecure and untethered to reality.

Finally, there, in a little treatment room in Sydney in 2001 – I came to a complete stop.

Obviously, the momentum of my frantic pre-Serge life is still with me sometimes, and it has taken all my strength to heal myself with the grace of my Soul standing with me, holding my hand when I thought I couldn’t do it anymore; when I felt so naked I wanted to run again, I felt the love from my heart holding me up.

I chose to not be a victim of my childhood and see what happened with the deep honouring of my past choices, and to heal that pattern so it no longer drives me.

My life is now my choice and as Serge said to me yesterday – “It’s time to count your blessings and not your imperfections.”

I know this is a big statement, but I truly believe that if it wasn’t for Serge Benhayon and his relentless love, I don’t think I would have made it to 2012. My soul very clearly listened when I was called to the Ageless Wisdom (again), and if it wasn’t for Serge’s strength, steadiness, consistency, deep care and tenderness, joy and silliness – I would not be here as the amazing forty four year old woman I am.

There is a deep truth that I know who I am – that I have now remembered from lives past – that is strong, steady, consistent, so deeply caring and tender, joyful and so silly that I smile at my sense of fun now, and can see that is who I am. It’s always been there, I just couldn’t see it.

Serge has only ever shown me back who I truly am; and all he has expressed to me through the multitude of repetitive, relentless LOVE of the Universal Medicine courses, audio presentations, sessions, emails and hugs I have received with grace over the years. Just the glory that I am, reflected back to me – with the total honouring of where I’m at.

One of the most glorious outcomes for me in working with my soul, Serge and Universal Medicine, is the wonderful, supportive, fun, healing, yummy and true friendships that permeate my life now.

The little four year old Sarah, who is untouched by all the outer-influences, is the one who knows truth – and quoting the amazing Rita Bone – “Sarah, you were born love, and you are love, so just be love“.

And all Serge has ever said to me is to BE THE LOVE THAT I AM, and that is simply all he has ever reflected back to me.

Thank you feels so inadequate, but the simplicity is perfect.

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