by Carmel Reid, Somerset, UK
I recently went to a gathering in London for people with Prosopagnosia – face-blindness. It is something that is estimated to affect around 2% of the UK population.
These are people who can’t remember faces – not names, but faces. Some can’t recognise their own family – children, husband, and friends – in some cases even themselves in a mirror. It was awesome hearing their stories and many of them echoed my own.
I have always had trouble recognising faces; I can remember hair, glasses, beards, clothes, accessories, and movement, but not the main features of the face.
Unfortunately, people change their clothes and can cut or colour their hair, and then I don’t recognise them. In my previous work as a corporate trainer I could spend a whole day teaching a group, but as soon as they got up and moved around to get a cup of coffee, I would forget who they were, even if they just put their jacket on!
It’s been a real challenge for me in my current work, too. I work at a busy supermarket in a local holiday village, and if a person comes to my till and says “Hello Again”, only then do I know they’ve been there before. It’s taken me months to get to know the faces of my colleagues, and as for Senior Management, who I don’t see very often, well, I really struggle. The smart suit is usually a clue, but I’m not always sure of exactly which one they are and hesitate to engage with them.
My case is not as severe as many of the people I met at the Prosopagnosia gathering, since I can eventually learn who people are when I meet them in four or five different situations. I still don’t remember the face, but getting to know what clothes they wear, the different ways they wear their hair, and most importantly, the way they move, really helps. I’ve stopped having those awful conversations where we keep talking and eventually I work out who people are, because sometimes I’d get it wrong and that would cause more problems and embarrassment. Nowadays, if I feel that I should know them, I usually ask their name up front and then I’m OK.
One of the scientific observations mentioned at the meeting is that people with prosopagnosia tend to avoid eye contact. My question would be, which came first? I always thought I was good at eye contact but now I’m observing my interactions more, I’m learning that actually, my eye contact is very brief. It’s as if I feel something very strong whenever I meet someone, and back off from it.
In an exercise during one of Serge Benhayon’s recent presentations, I sat looking directly at another person for several minutes. It was lovely – I could see what a wonderful colour her eyes were, and began to notice the features of her face. Somehow I felt ‘safe’ and it was fun.
I can’t answer for anyone else who has this problem as to why they don’t recognise faces, but I’m experimenting for myself now, when I meet someone, to allow my eyes to see what’s there instead of going into some kind of mental abyss where I am more concerned to avoid feeling whatever is going on, instead of allowing myself to feel the person as well as see them.
My biggest challenge at the moment is with fellow Universal Medicine students, especially the women. As they become more and more beautiful, their faces change. Their way of dressing and styling their hair becomes such an expression of their inner beauty, and there’s such an inner glow, that when I meet someone I don’t see very often, I don’t recognise them and have to ask their name again and again. They tell me with either surprise or patience, but I’m not sure they fully understand what’s going on.
It’s wonderful to see it, and I know I have changed as well, because people often comment on how great I look; but perhaps, if you see me in the street, and I hesitate, or worse, I ignore you, please don’t be offended, simply remind me who you are, and then I’ll remember everything I know about you!
The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
We don’t spend time looking directly at people when we meet them for the first time. We hear a name and it comes from a body but nothing more. I find that if I really connect with them as they say their name, I can recall them later on.
This whole meet and greet is different when we meet so many people on a daily basis. And yet Serge Benhayon and his family can remember countless peoples names for they see and feel us from who we are, a connection far deeper than the human.
Holding eye contact with another person is like opening yourself up to be seen and to really see and feel the other, provided you are willing to drop any barriers. Some people struggle to look you in the eye and hold the gaze, and for some it is seen as culturally inappropriate, whilst others can try to hold the gaze too long creating an imposition in what otherwise is a natural connection.
I’ve attended workshops where we were asked to look into someone’s eyes for what seemed an eternity. If a person is walking around with issues just being with people, isn’t suddenly going to melt and let everyone in. There’s a development to it.
If a person looks into you with love, transparency, but also your equal, then that’s a different story and feeling too. There’s a contrast between the two and are clearly felt.
I too can struggle sometimes with remembering a person, especially if it is out of context eg. when you normally see them in a particular setting like the gym wearing exercise clothes, but then see them at the supermarket in normal clothes – this can really throw me off especially if I do not know the person very well.
Wow – amazing sharing Carmel, and not only has this has taught me a lot about a topic I did not know much or perhaps even at all about, but also it has helped me understand how this can affect people in their lives in all the ways you have shared. Thank you!
There is a really great saying that “Everyone has a story” which means that we can’t judge people, everyone has experienced something that is impacting on their life in some way, and everyone has a depth of life experience, etc, so to judge or dismiss people is to miss the opportunity to respect others, and to be open and learn from one another. Thanks for sharing your story as I’ve never heard of this condition prior to reading your blog. I also have two quite serious health conditions that impact every moment of my day, and it can affect my ability to communicate well with people if I’m not functioning too well, and this can be met with judgement and dismissiveness. All we really need to do is hold each other with care and warmth and be open to people.
When you look someone in the eyes all the outer stuff fades into the background I find. Gender, job, roles, abilities or not, none of it matters or compares when connecting to another.
Meeting and connecting to another can bring up lots in us, ‘ when I meet someone, to allow my eyes to see what’s there instead of going into some kind of mental abyss where I am more concerned to avoid feeling whatever is going on, instead of allowing myself to feel the person as well as see them.’
“Prosopagnosia’ is something I have never heard of, but can recognise traits of not recognising faces, yet people always seem to remember me. That can be disconcerting.
This is a very interesting read especially when I got to this part
“when I meet someone, to allow my eyes to see what’s there instead of going into some kind of mental abyss where I am more concerned to avoid feeling whatever is going on, instead of allowing myself to feel the person as well as see them.”
I wonder what it is we are trying to avoid when we look into someone’s eyes and instead checkout of our own bodies by going into the mental abyss to avoid what is there to been seen and felt.
I love the title of this blog – “Who are the People behind these Beautiful Faces?” – that is what we want to get to know and connect.
Energetically we are all in the same boat so when we learn to read energy and thus treating everyone the same can be important. So maybe feeling the Love of another’s essence then we do not need such high resolution of faces but understanding the energy people are in could be how we relate to another. And the voice and sounds we express in can be also felt for the energy we are in.
Reading this has me pondering on how I do not recognise directions, and it takes a long time for me to get acquainted with an area. Even if I know where I am if I come in from a different angle I may as well be in a foreign country. This shows up when driving but is also there when I go shopping or in the doctors’ office. It’s as if the initial corridor, road or shop is new to me. What I do these days when out shopping is to take a look back to see which direction I came from before entering the shop, otherwise I could be wandering around the shopping centre for hours. This direction was also present in my thirties because when driving home in Alabama on a road that I had travelled many times, I would not recognise where I was and end up going miles out of my way. It’s not a massive problem because I compensate by using a satnav or my phone, but it does have me wondering what the root cause is.
Julie, what a simple and gorgeous sharing and reminds me of how people would use the stars to know where they were.
As I woman and a student of The Way of the Livingness presented by Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon, and I can testify that I have changed enormously, within and without, with my figure completely changing, slimmer yes, but far more gentle and delicate in all my movements. It’s like I have went through a total re-configuration, from head to toe, but the biggest difference is how much I appreciate, adore and love myself which has a ripple effect in every area of my life…. gone are the days of harsh judgement and criticism of self, self-doubt and negative thoughts.
It is very inspiring to read about how you have changed, especially “I appreciate, adore and love myself which has a ripple effect in every area of my life….” Once we ignite our self love again how we feel on the inside has to change everything on the outside of our life. It’s how we feel in our being that determines how we live, so a return to a sense of true well-being by reconnecting to Soul is the foundation for a healthier and joy filled life.
What you share highlights a bit of arrogance on our part that we should expect you to remember us and then take it personally when you don’t! However I love that you have shared this blog so now we can all be more aware to bring understanding to those who may take a bit more time to remember who we are.
Beautifully said Lucy – how often can we assume something about another, and then take things personally when there is certainly no need to do so…This is an arrogance, to behave in a way that does not bring understanding nor space to another, but to recognise this is a great start.
We do not just get a condition and even less just any condition. They have a lot to do with our relations (how we relate to the world, to life, to ourselves and to others).
Carmel, what a deeply honest and beautiful blog. I’m struck by the fact that we need to allow ourselves to receive another person and not taint them with our expectations and lens and in fact eye contact is a wonderful way to do that, and I’m here considering how I am with that at times, as others have noted I can often shy away from it, especially if a hurt is triggered, but staying with this is cutting myself and the other off. Your understanding here ‘to allow my eyes to see what’s there’ is huge and I realise how in allowing that I make it about more than me, the wider, bigger picture of us all, and there’s less of a striving or trying to do something or to fit in … it offers a freedom. So thank you Carmel for your sharing, it’s been a revelation and a great support in understanding how we can be and meet with ourselves and others.
A very honest blog and a great re-read. At the end you mention how Universal Medicine students , women change so much because they are living more of themselves and their innerbeauty is let out. You are definitely one of them, wow what have you changed in the years I know you, a beautiful woman getting older but looking younger and younger each time I saw you and at the moment when I see you on Facebook. And you are even getting more honest than ever before.
Ahhh so that’s what I have got ! 🙂
Its a very intense and interesting dis-ease Carmel. Its one thing I always do is look at someone’s face. It can tell you everything about them what sort of life they have lived and how they are feeling at the time. An exercise we did recently at a Universal Medicine retreat was observation and receiving all that another came with. It was so revealing that I could feel a whole lot more than what they were saying.
Thanks for sharing this Carmel, I had never heard of this before and it is great to know. I may have a touch of this myself for if anyone changes their hair and look I often don’t recognise them either.
Thank you Carmel for sharing your story. I can only imagine how challenging it must be, but it also goes to show the power of honesty. When we share with others that we have a problem, like recognising them in your case, it is actually so much easier on our body than trying to pretend everything is okay. I can relate to pretending I knew someone when I had no idea who they were and it certainly felt uncomfortable in my body; it’s a very different feeling compared to being totally honest.
I never knew such a thing existed either. Instead of labelling this a disability and thinking of the person as less simply because of their imperfection to do something most others can, we ought to not focus on what the person does, but on who they already are. Whether we can or cannot do something does not change who we are and I feel the ‘disabled’ label is cutting us off from seeing this fact.
Reading your blog Carmel I am remembering how I let the diagnoses of a balance disorder define my every movement with caution. But since coming to Universal Medicine I have come to the understanding of the importance of uncovering the root causes of this condition and once I realised how it was me and the lifestyle choices, I was making at the time, that caused it. And through taking responsibility and learning from the consequences of these choices, the condition now has very little impact on my life.
So true, we think we have failed, or been wrong somehow but knowing the root causes of things supports us in so many ways to re-imprint and clear the pattern of behaviour from our lives once and for all.
To be so open and honest about ones seemingly inadequacies is refreshing, for it gives us all permission to be open about our own and to not continue to hide away, but to step forward, talk about how things are for us and together support each other to live side by side in the world.
“One of the scientific observations mentioned at the meeting is that people with prosopagnosia tend to avoid eye contact. My question would be, which came first?” I have found through personal experience that my inability to make eye contact with other people boiled down to the deep hurts that I still carried within me. Although I don’t have prosopagnosia, it is interesting to see that this is a key factor in the condition that for me feels like it is arising from the same place. The more I have healed these hurts, the more I genuinely enjoy making eye contact and therefore the need to turn away from people and withdraw at whatever level is simply no longer there. Universal Medicine has enabled me to completely transform my relationship with people beyond all recognition and it seems is having a similar effect on you too, Carmel. Awesome work.
Yes, Rowena, this is true, I love making eye contact with complete strangers and it is surprising how many seem to love it and respond. There are still times when I avoid eye contact even with my own partner and then it’s so obvious I know there is something that I need to express to clear the air so to speak, or at least to let him know what’s going on for me.
That is a remarkable insight Carmel – to understand that by not fully looking into the eyes of another you have gone into a mental abyss that prevents you from recognising the distinguishing features on another’s face. This line says it all: “ It’s as if I feel something very strong whenever I meet someone, and back off from it.” There is a great learning for us all in this whether we suffer from Prosopagnosia or not.
What I personally find interesting is how it is easy to look another in the eyes when I feel whole and confident in my body, yet when I feel uneasy or challenged I find it difficult to hold the gaze of another.
‘One of the scientific observations mentioned at the meeting is that people with prosopagnosia tend to avoid eye contact. ‘ What an interesting point Carmel… Maybe part of not wanting to be seen, allowing our selves to be seen and therefore others as well.
This condition is a great example how we accommodate, how we structure our life around one fact our body seems it cannot go beyond. Yet, it can if it is safe to go there.
I love that the comments above include all disabilities and acknowledge that a disability does not make us lesser. I am currently volunteering in an aged care home and am delighted to see that the staff treat everybody with the same level of respect regardless of their ability and level of conscious presence. It is teaching me that everyone is of value, whether they choose to engage with me or not.
Carmel I studied Kindergarten teaching about 25 years ago which covered the care, development and education of children aged 0-8 and one of the things we were taught was that there are truly no disabilities, just people with differing abilities, this brought equality to everyone and supported students of the course to let go of any beliefs or judgements knowing we all have something to offer, and that the package a child or person comes in (the body) makes no difference to that.
Thank you Carmel for the honesty in which you share this with us, it is great to share these things as we all get to learn from them, and a disability can make us more able in many other ways.
It is interesting that people with Prosopagnosia avoid eye contact and that when you became aware of this Carmel you observed your own level of eye contact with others to be brief – I love that you are doing your own experiment on understanding more about this for that is what human life is all about, being open to learning and growing and then what you learn you share with others, and then they share it with others and so on.
Yes I noticed this and how she had thought she had good eye contact. How often do we consider we are connecting with people only to find it is a very brief connection when we actually bring our attention to observing how we do it!
What an honest blog Carmel, thank you for sharing this.. To get more understanding of what might occur within another when it comes down to recognizing faces, people. To not judge but simply ask and be open to another – no matter the background or what.
How often do we really see people for who they are? Not by the way they look, but in their true essence? And we do meet someone for the very first time but feel certain that we have met each other before. Feeling of connection, rather than recognition feels more enriching.
The process of connecting with someone else can sometimes be a bit confronting, as who they are brings with them a potential offering for us. With that we may be open, or hesitant, or possibly closed. If we have met them before we may have issues from the past. So there is much more going on than remembering their name and knowing that makes the ability to connect much simpler.
It’s really beautiful when disabilities are shared in this way from a place of acceptance and understanding. As apposed to hurt or defensiveness. Accepting that we can’t do something as well as others doesn’t mean we are less and yet sadly this is how disabilities can be related to. I may not have a major disability that affects my day to day life but that doesn’t make me better than another.
Carmel, you may not recognise a person’s face but you certainly recognise their essence and that is what is important.
What I love about this blog Carmel is that you share a beautiful message, that would deepen the way we meet and connect with each other if we put it into practice. When we are with another person do we allow ourselves to be open to feel and receive who they are, or are we looking out at their physicality and mentally assessing and qualifying what it is we are seeing. There is so much more to us that our physicality and what you have shared here highlights how valuable it is to connect to the quality of being with another, be present with who they, as regardless of the physical changes we go through we do remember the quality of being we have come to know and the loving connections we have developed.
This is such a fascinating blog. I had no idea this condition existed until I read this blog.This is just another reason why we should never ever take things personally.
Carmel you have changed so much over the years I have known you – do you recognise yourself in the mirror now that you can look into your eyes and know who you are?
I never knew there was such a thing and so I’ve learnt something today. It must be very disturbing for something like this to happen, especially in such a short space of time. I can only imagine and try to understand how it must be for people with this condition. I am seeing it brings me more understanding for people as well because you just never know what is truly going on for everyone and a lot of the time you take it personally when in fact it’s clearly not. The next time someone doesn’t remember someones face I won’t walk into judgement but be more understanding and respectful, you just never know where and what some of us have seen and been through. After all we are here to truly support each other and not cut each other down at every turn.
Thank you for sharing Carmel, I am always amazed how Serge Benhayon remembers everyone’s names at events, and we are talking in the hundreds of people at some of the events.
I have worked in early learning centres and child minding services my entire life. Many of the children I have cared for have now become adults or parents themselves. When I have crossed paths with them many years later it is never the names that I will remember but their eyes. Our bodies change, we get older but the marker of the quality which we live is presented with our eyes which stands still over time.
Taking stock and appreciating the choices we have made no matter how small they are, allow us to discover and accept the true beauty within and the way we are to live heaven on earth.
Conscious presence in ourselves, being present with who we are with, and what we are doing asks us to be willing to be present with whatever is there. Sometimes it might not be so pleasant, or sometimes it might be so loving and wise we don’t want to see it as it is asking us to be that ourselves. Either way through connection to ourself we will evolve.
The worst thing for me is when people change their hairstyle or hair colour – and greet me with the most amazing friendly smile – if I am seeing them out of context, or even in a different country – I may be trying to scan my database for that place or that country and think… who are they? Then, suddenly they move or speak in a way that is familiar and I realise who they are. Fortunately my openness is supporting me so that they don’t feel rejected, and I have to be careful to stop myself feeling stupid, but I usually allow myself time for recognition – waiting to see what they speak about, or if any familiar body language signs come up. It’s quite tricky when someone has obviously had an instant recognition of you and you take longer to recognise them. I hadn’t realised before that I have a database of different contexts…
It’s an interesting dis-ease and the possible dis-harmony it creates with others when you do not acknowledge them. It’s great to be aware of this and all the more to honour that space between others by truly connecting to them and receive in full all they live, and have lived. Like you say Carmel there is more than their face to connect to.
Opening up to feeling energy and reading people and situations is a skill we are not taught in school, and only parents who are already aware will encourage their children to do so. Our clairsentience is our greatest protection because if we sense, we know to go or not to go wherever, or to talk/not talk to a particular stranger. The knowing is instant, there is no dilemma, and we can act according to what we sense.
Great point Carmel that it’s our awareness that is our greatest protection: when we stay aware and read, we’re present and in the moment and able to respond appropriately. It’s when we’re not wanting to feel that we withdraw and shut down, which doesn’t serve anyone or the situation.
Your sharing Carmel really highlights how we should never judge another or think ill of them for things they may do, in this case not remembering us, for there may often be more going on than meets the eye. And as you say yourself, the opportunity in this condition is for you to really open up to people and read them, use your other senses, particularly that sixth one to understand who you are meeting. And I guess whether we have prosopagnosia or not, this is a rather special thing we can all do.
I’ve just moved to another country where I know a lot of people so I have an existing database to build on. I am getting more and more confident at saying ‘have we met before?’ but I did embarrass myself at an event by asking someone their name when I’d only spoken to them an hour before. Facebook has been a blessing for me, as long as they post their own photo on their profile and not their kids or dog, I can check what people look like, but I’m still not really connecting with people, and that is for me to work on.
This is such a wonderfully honest sharing about a condition that I actually didn’t know anything about until a few years ago. Being someone who doesn’t forget a face but often forgets names, I can imagine how challenging it must be to live in the world where as you say, people are changing the way they look on a regular basis. I used to be one who struggled to make eye contact but these days I realise how much of a person I miss out on when I don’t take the time to look into their beautiful and very expressive eyes.
Actually I think most Australians have Prosopagnosia… Whenever you are called ‘mate’ it is a dead giveaway that they have forgotten your name.
Holy moly Carmel… I recall reading this blog a few years ago, and being struck by the fact that this is your experience. To read of this strikes me deeply, at just how readily we can judge another for their behaviour – when we may not have the slightest understanding of what is truly going on for them.
In a society plagued with many unseen conditions, inclusive of the alarming rates of chronic lower back pain for example, we are all called to be more tender and understanding of one another, and willing to go beyond the surface of how we expect another to be. This was deeply worthy of a re-read, and you are one amazing lady of greatness of heart Carmel – connecting with so many people in your life and living ‘undeterred’ by the facial recognition situation, even though it mustn’t always be easy… Clearly, connection is what comes first and foremost to you. Love it.
Hi Victoria, funny you mention connection, I have sometimes come across two people, usually women, who have such similar energy as well as similar hair styles and similar ages, that I have difficulty telling which one is which. The same with two brothers I knew – if I saw them together then it was easy because one was older and taller, but individually I was never sure which of the two it was.I’m sure people think I’m weird, and if I can let go of the ‘what do people think of me’ self-focus and simply respond to their energy, then we are in connection and it doesn’t matter what their name is.
Beautifully said Carmel – it is this that matters first and foremost by far. I’m reminded of when I forget someone’s name – does this really matter? Because I most definitely know the person before me, and so much about them that is way beyond a name…
I’ve often marvelled and the fact and questioned if a had a ‘gift’ for reading faces. I always seem to be able to recognise actors in their different characters across different movies, even with age. For me, it’s their eyes that give it away. I love how you are exploring this for yourself Carmel.
I love your observation that people are more likely change their look than their movements. Yes it is so easy to change what we wear, our hair and colors – but how we move is mostly the same. Here lies the key why we so often do not get rid of old behaviors which do not serve us well: we may change our look, setting or surroundings – but not the way we move through life. And thats the key.
So sorry if that brings you again in trouble Carmel, but I like to encourage all to bring a change into our movements as well.
This is true, Sandra, in the past when I have worked with people to help them develop confidence in themselves, it has been amazing to learn how the simple gesture of straightening your spine enables us to feel more confident. And in my own body, I tend to slump when I am not conscious of how I am sitting and when I sit up straight it clears my head, in fact, clears my whole body.
Yeay Carmel! I am just on an exercise program that includes some stretching for the spine and at the end I do some circles with my arms and stretch my spine a bit to the back while looking up. After that I feel a bit higher in length 🙂 and more connected to my authority and joy. I find myself more deeply connected to my body and in the feeling of ‘ok life – whats next?!’ – and I love it.
Since writing this blog I have met many people who can’t remember faces or names and sometimes both. It does feel good when someone remembers our name but, as several have written above, it is so much more important to feel truly met in that moment for everything that is happening in that moment.
I love the simple, honest and clear way you have explained this Carmel. There’s such an innocence, acceptance and straightforwardness about your writing that supports a deepening of understanding for those reading.
Having not heard of Prosopagnosia, I found this a remarkable read and the most curious of conditions. I especially love that you have chosen to experiment with this through eye contact to support yourself deeply and have allowed yourself to both feel and see another like never before…. It is amazing that you are observing with all your senses to override the effect of the condition and ultimately meet the people for all they are even if it takes a little while to recognize who they are.
Somehow we have been led to believe that it is important to remember people and to not remember is insulting. This means that part of our self worth, our importance, is tied up with another recognising how important we are. This is certainly giving our power away. How much more honouring it is to be met in that moment, whether there is any recognition of past moments or not. How lovely to be explored in that moment, without recognition of the baggage we once carried.
The more we share about ourselves the more we can offer others something that perhaps they have never heard of eg.Prosopagnosia which I had not come across before. The more I share and live transparency with nothing to hide, the freer I feel with an increased amount of joy embodied.
You may not always remember people’s beautiful faces Carmel but feeling and remembering anothers beautiful quality is equally if not more important.
Thanks for sharing this Carmel – I had heard of Agnosia but not Prosopagnosia. What I love about your evolution here is that it involves a much deeper connection with the people you meet when commonly such meetings can be rather superficial. To engage every sense in the process of meeting another, including how and what we feel brings so much more to that encounter and it seems to me, offers the opportunity to know that person on a much truer and deeper level. I also feel the power there is in eye contact in a way that truly lets people in. This can feel intimate but perhaps we shouldn’t shy away from intimacy. Perhaps what is there to be discovered in another person is in truth very beautiful.
I have never heard of this before! That is why it is so important to share information about different disabilities so we have a deeper and more loving understanding of what people with disabilities are experiencing.
Thanks for sharing this Carmel, I didn’t know that this was something that affected people but then realise that sometimes mildly happens with me. When reading the part about making eye contact I realised how much I will sometimes avoid much eye contact and with this not fully appreciate and fully connect with, feel and read the person I am with.
Fascinating sharing Carmel! Adding to the eye contact question, the eagle eye to study movement is puzzling. The fact that this is the focus and not the face features (which you can see as you shared), makes me wonder whether this choice of where to focus on is a reflection of deep mistrust as in studying movement to be ready in case a defense is needed.
That is an interesting question, Eduardo, I’m not sure if I ‘defend’ myself by watching body language, although it certainly enables me to read people. When you are very short sighted it is easier to see a whole body than facial features, but then I could ask what led to my being born so short sighted in this lifetime, and what choices I may have made to not see truth. Either way, it presents a perfect opportunity to develop my natural clairsentience and FEEL people…
Thank you Carmel for allowing yourself to accept what we can learn both from but also in the experience of this condition without hardness and self-judgement, including the opportunity to not just focus on what we can see but to increase our awareness to feel everything.
Thank you for a humorous piece on how we should be approaching and dealing with our dis-abilities!
I had an experience at work recently when I was on the checkout and didn’t recognise a colleague from the cafe where I work the rest of the week. She wasn’t wearing the hat and she was wearing glasses, so she looked different, and she was out of context, but I was puzzled because her voice was uncannily like the colleague I knew, so I asked her if she was related! Fortunately we had a laugh about it, and that’s how it needs to be – I find it debilitating sometimes, because I love knowing who people are and using their name, and if I’m not careful I can make myself feel less because of the uncertainty, but accepting that it is simply an ‘imperfection’ and not the whole of me being a disaster area, is going a long way towards minimising its effects on my confidence.
This is so interesting Carmel. I had no idea that a ‘disability’ like not recognising faces even existed. It would be wonderful to know how you are progressing with it after making the choice to connect to people and observe their faces deeply when meeting them.
Thank you for sharing Carmel, remembering names and faces is not always easy, especially when I see them periodically.