Recognition for Doing: The Blueprint of my Life before Universal Medicine

by Alison Moir, UK

I have been active all my life, and when I say active I mean doing… I was always doing something. Looking back it was the only way I could be seen, be recognised. Doing for me meant physical.

At the age of 9 or 10, I was out all day working at a stable in the possibility that I might get to ride a pony back to the field. I now see it was because I wasn’t happy at home, so to get away, doing became my way to escape, to not feel what was really going on. There was an underlying blueprint in my life that to get on in life, to succeed, you had to ‘do’.

I wasn’t encouraged to have dolls, to wear pink, to be a girl – as long I was doing then I was seen to be ok. I was left alone. If I saw girls being ‘girlie’, I saw it as being weak – as silly and a waste of time. So from the very beginning of my childhood I was encouraged to do… not play, not have fun.

This I took into my adult life, being busy, working hard. The trouble with this is that you forget about yourself, everything becomes being what someone else wants you to be. I learnt to be a chameleon – I changed myself to fit in with everyone, to accommodate everyone so that I would not make waves, so that I did not upset people. All the time I was doing, I was losing the real me. Somewhere deep inside I knew something was not right, but the whole world was busy… so where do you look to find something different?

Life became a chore, a way of getting by.

By the time I got to 30, my life was already mapped out, and I went along with it. 40’s… and I knew something wasn’t right. I would make changes, but they changed nothing, so I would fall back into my old pattern, ‘the doing’, so that I didn’t have to question how my life really was.

My wake up call came when my husband was diagnosed with cancer, and after 3 years of trying to fight it, in the year 2000 he died. I began to question so many things – why did my husband get cancer? Why was life such a struggle? Why is there this empty feeling inside of me, that won’t go away? Now I wanted answers to my question that I had been asking throughout my life: Is this all there is to life? There has to be more.

By now my health was not great: I wasn’t sick but neither was I well.  After several years of trying alternative medicine and modalities nothing felt right – it didn’t change what I was feeling inside. All the time there was this underlying giving-up, a sense that nothing really worked, so I began to make my life as comfortable as possible. Working for myself was a great comfort as I could do as much or as little as I liked, avoiding situations that I didn’t want to deal with and in doing so, slowly opt out of life. I was no longer accountable to anyone.

Learning to be me again

I am now nearly 57 and for the first time in my life I am enjoying it: why? Because I have re-claimed me. It has taken nearly 10 years to find me in the malaise of what I had allowed in my life to take me away from me.

I now work in a busy supermarket where I am accountable to everyone. It exposes all the little things in me that I kept hidden from the world. This is not all bad because it is also bringing out the real me again – not the one that wants to please and be liked for what I am doing, but the loving woman who does care about humanity.

To peel back all the layers of me not being me has been very exposing: to unravel what has been imposed on me through life, all my ideals and beliefs I have carried with me. To accept responsibility for my choices and my actions has at times been painful to reveal, but I knew there was nowhere else to hide and I knew that I could not turn back from something I knew to be true. My questions were being answered and that is what kept me going through the not so easy times.

I could not have done it without the inspiration of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine and all the amazing practitioners. Why? There was very little in life that was reflecting back to me that how I was living my life was not true. Everywhere I looked people were living a similar life. No one seemed to be asking the question, let alone having the answer.

Thank you Serge and Universal Medicine for standing by me, showing me it is possible to know me again… and in finding me I have found the answer to my question.

183 thoughts on “Recognition for Doing: The Blueprint of my Life before Universal Medicine

  1. Alison, I resonate with the ‘doing’, it kind of feels most of humanity are in this situation. And I have had this feeling for a long time too and nothing would quench it. Until my path to discovering myself led me to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine too. With his workshops, presentations and the support of practitioners, I too am in a different place and no longer searching for that something, that was always missing.

    I’ve learnt more and more the meaning of responsibility, and if everyone of us played our part in this, I wonder if the world be in a different place?…

  2. “Everywhere I looked people were living a similar life. No one seemed to be asking the question, let alone having the answer.” I experienced this also, and I asked a lot of questions, but everyone seemed to think this way of life was it, and that there was nothing else. I’ve always had this deep knowing that there has to be more to life, that there is a purpose well beyond our physical existence. For me I searched for decades for that truth, for the answers to the many questions I had, and for me I found that in full when I began attending workshops with Serge Benhayon, and more than found it outside of me, I reconnected to it also within me with the support that Serge provides.

  3. When everyone else around us acts as if playing this game of life is ‘normal’, it is easy to get sucked up into thinking it actually is ‘normal’. But when you get one person who holds themselves dearly, who has a true connection to life, this will stand out very clearly, and you will see that the normal is not our true normal, that life is not to be endured but life is to be lived. People like Serge Benhayon offer a tremendously powerful reflection of living the Truth with each footstep on earth.

    1. Henrietta, how true is this. When we know who, what, where we are/from, we stand out like a sore thumb. It is kind of saying the norm many are used to, is seen as the norm, when the true norm is hidden underneath all of these layers that do not belong to us. So, when we live from there, we are that beacon of a light, some will enjoin, some are not ready – all ok too.

  4. We might physically appear well on the outside and blood tests show all is good on the inside, but if we feel an un-ease on the inside and this does not get addressed, then eventually this too can show itself in the physical and eventually show itself in blood tests. This is the meaning of Dis-Ease.

  5. The more busy we keep ourselves, the less likely we are to stop and question what our life is really about, what we are really here for , or how we could do things differently. This is a very effective way for us to remain in function of life rather than in the living of life.

  6. Stopping ‘doing’ and just ‘being oneself’ sounds so simple yet when one has accumulated much ‘doing’ over the years it is very challenging yet so rewarding – there is not the baggage of trying to ‘be something’.

  7. Serge Benhayon offers so much love and support for all of us, ‘I am now nearly 57 and for the first time in my life I am enjoying it: why? Because I have re-claimed me.’ Great to hear Alison.

  8. Thank you Alison, I could relate to much of what you have shared, I recently noticed how I changed myself to fit in with someone which surprised me, but reading your words about always being in the ‘doing’ and accommodating others it made sense what I had experienced.

    1. Yes, I can really relate with always doing, and being encouraged to always be busy, or doing, and the subsequent recognition that that brings.

  9. Yes so true, when we receive a reflection that feels true to us we get confirmed that it is possible to live it in this world, and step by step we can return to the truth we know.

  10. One of the great things about Universal Medicine is the number of Students who offer an amazing reflection as our reflection is our greatest form of communicating and as you have shared Alison there used to be no one reflecting a True way of Living or Livingness.

    1. Serge Benhayon offers us all so much, that there is another way to live, a true way, and that we are far more than we allow ourselves to be.

      1. Absolutely Lorraine, we have the ability to appreciate all of who we are and appreciation being the understanding we are more than human, how simple is that?

    2. It’s so true Greg, what we truly respond to needs no words, our reflection is the absolute truth of the energy we live with, and we feel and read that reflection in the detail. Feeling someone live with Soul is a reflection we will never forget even if we initially resist it, because it’s a mirror for who we truly are also.

  11. We are so used to being identified with doing, the roles we play, it is hard to know ourselves for who we are really beyond the familiarity of patterns of behavior and personality. All along, we try to do the right thing, thinking somehow we have to get this life thing right, but it is not about that – and that, we do not get taught.

    1. Yes, letting go of the identifications we have from our doings can be very challenging as we start to believe that they are us but they are just like a layer of coats we put on and hence we can take them off.

    2. Yes, let go of the identifications we have from our doings can be very challenging as we become to believe that they are us but they are just like a layer of coats we put on and hence we can take them off.

  12. We do forget about ourselves when we get caught up in the doing and why we stay busy, if we stop for too long we have to feel what is not us and what we have taken on that is not true. It is worth stopping though and connecting back with the truth of our inner feelings and learning to express and live from a quality and love that is our natural expression and not trying to prove ourselves by what we do or achieve.

  13. I really enjoyed and could relate to what was shared. “In finding me I have found the answer to my question”. This is exactly where I have found the answers in life that I hadn’t even known I wanted to know. It is where everything makes sense to me now.

    1. We can tend to seek from the outside and look for all kinds of answers or solutions, but the real Truths we seek are found within when we connect to ourselves and our Soul. To seek within we must really want to know the answers, and then it is a blessing that is accessible to make sense of all that does not make sense in this world.

  14. We think that being ourselves in life is living the image of ourselves that we have created. The problem with this is that it changes over time, moulds into other images, depending on what we are interested in, what we follow and how we want to fit into this world, often because this makes us safe.

  15. We can carry these things around as our normal without questioning them if there wasn’t this niggling feeling that there must be more to life. This niggling feeling calls us back telling us there is more and hence the constant search. Whilst we are searching we see this constant ache as a curse, yet now I can see it was the most wonderful gift from a body who waits, ever patiently, for us to come home.

  16. If we are honest we all have this inner tension of knowing that there is more to life but not knowing how to uncover it and so thank you Alison for taking about how you have started to answer those burning questions on life that you have had for it definitely confirms in me that we don’t have to settle for a life of comforting and suppressing the questions but that we can actually actively answer them and therefore live a fulfilling life.

    1. It shows the power in our ability to be real and honest, to not dismiss how we feel, and the power that truly questioning life can bring. We can uncover a much richer way of being.

  17. “I could not have done it without the inspiration of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine and all the amazing practitioners. Why? There was very little in life that was reflecting back to me that how I was living my life was not true. Everywhere I looked people were living a similar life. No one seemed to be asking the question, let alone having the answer.” That is what Serge Benhayon offers us, that there is another way to live and that there is more to us and life than we want / allow ourselves to see.

  18. I very much relate to this sharing in the sense that I also found horses and stables to ‘do’ things when I was young and get away from home. I also became the chameleon and invested hugely in adapting to peoples needs. And now I also feel the difference in saying no to this, and for the first time I know who I am and my qualities – it is not just about the doing.

    1. Could it be people are searching for something outside themselves so they are ready to change at any moment to find the true self and now we have Students reflecting a true way of being, which puts a stop to the searching and opens people to their own essences because of the divine reflection received?

  19. I was the ultimate do-er and I was really convinced that was what life was about. But it wasn’t until I came across Serge Benhayon that I began to see what was driving the incessant doing and that was the need for recognition. It made total sense, as I never used to feel I belonged anywhere, the proverbial square peg in the round hole, and the doing was a way to get people to see and need me. How exhausting and emotionally draining that was and a ‘blue-print’ I am totally re-drawing.

  20. I can relate very much to a similar blueprint and being driven to keep busy in the doing of life to be able to cope with the tension of something not feeling right and giving up that there was another way to be. That is, until coming across Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine who taught me to look within myself to know who I am first rather than adapting to I thought the world needed me to be and then feeling anxious all the time in not being myself.

  21. I agree Alison there is very little if anything in life to reflect to us a true way of living, that is with the exception of the Universal Medicine practitioners and its student body. Here we have an international body of people living their lives to the best of their ability, in a true and loving way.

    1. And this reflection from people living the Truth to the best of their ability is a blessing indeed. Like a rainbow of colours across the sky, the reflections of each person brings a colour that is unique and yet so very much part of the whole.

  22. Alison it is very touching what you have shared, the journey from childhood through life, and now returning to your true self again. I’m in the same process and have moments where I feel the purity of my essence just as it was as a baby and little girl, it’s true that it’s in there still untouched by what we have been through, even though we must peel back the layers of hurts and ideals and beliefs we have built up around it.

  23. Gorgeous to read this Alison and how clear you were on the old blueprint that kept you going round in circles. Very inspiring message you deliver that when we find ourselves again, everything we need for this life is already inside us…and the key to access all this is through our hearts.

  24. I can very much relate to this article and the deep feeling inside that something was just not right. Learning that the something was that I was missing being the person I could feel I was inside, compromising and bringing parts of me out, and holding myself at bay to fit the life I had were the greatest hinderances to feeling and living the natural joy I have inside.

  25. Yes, we are all so caught up in the life we live that we do not even consider that there is another way, and that is exactly what Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine bring and offer, that there is another way and that we do not have to continue on the road we have done so far but can make new choices and build consistency and true love in our lives.

  26. I love the idea of having a blueprint for life, a underlying, detailed, amazing map for life, that describes in intricate detail what is important to us and a plan of where we’re going and how we’re going to get there.

    1. This somehow reminds me of all the fantasy and science fiction movies. How awesome and and expanding for everyone would it be if they were built on this kind of blueprint.

  27. Thank you Alison, I enjoyed reading your blog. I could relate to this line “Working for myself was a great comfort as I could do as much or as little as I liked, avoiding situations that I didn’t want to deal with and in doing so, slowly opt out of life.” I have also done this and what I am learning is how important it actually is to be uncomfortable at times because it’s a necessary part of evolution, to challenge us and to bring up the hurts we have carefully managed to not feel and deal with by creating a life of comfort. Being out there in life is where the learning happens.

  28. Losing ourselves in the doing is so easy in a world that is all about doing, looking to the next thing, multi-tasking.. I’m pretty good at getting things done but if I do it in loads of drive and push, I leave myself behind, and then I feel grumpy, tense and disconnected at the end of the day, and then I’ll want to numb those feelings. What supports me is staying connected to my body throughout the day, doing one thing at a time, with my full attention and focus, rather than getting lost in distractions along the way. Then I end the day feeling pretty amazing – much more vital and energised.

  29. Peeling back the layers of our ideals and beliefs that hold us to ransom with their consciousness is definitely an ongoing and at times uncomfortable way to live your everyday life. But nonetheless this discomfort is far better than the alternative of living blindly in accordance with them and accumulating additional layers that also will inevitably need to be peeled back at a later date. Best not delay and just get on with it now instead of making it even harder for ourselves later.

  30. “Life became a chore, a way of getting by” – this feels like how so many of us think what life is about. We fear death, but we live as if we can hardly wait for the day we die. No matter how much we achieve and how busy we get, if we are empty of ourselves, not knowing or connecting with who we are, life feels very empty and pointless.

  31. I totally relate to the doing, I was so caught up in achieving something I was constantly moving on, from one thing to the next, until I came across Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, when I realised that it was in fact nothing about the doing at all, it was all about the quality we are with ourselves first.

  32. I agree – finding ourselves is a wonderful thing – and there is nothing outside of us that can better it.

  33. My life is in many ways a mirror of the life that you describe, where doing is used relentlessly to cover up the huge chasm of emptiness that would be felt the moment the doing ceases. I too always knew that there must be more, but had no idea that the more was living with me and inside me all the time.

    1. Doug it’s a great description you have made here “where doing is used relentlessly to cover up the huge chasm of emptiness that would be felt the moment the doing ceases.” The emptiness is something I knew but couldn’t understand, not until I met Serge and began using the Gentle Breath Meditation and the Universal Medicine Therapies and reconnected back to myself, to the essence of who I am within. What I realise now is how much that emptiness has to do with so much of life, self harming choices like alcoholism or smoking, overeating, withdrawing from life, etc, the list goes on and on. Reconnecting to who we are is definitely a universal medicine.

      1. I guess it is an emptiness that we are all aware of and will do just about anything to not feel. Yes reconnecting to our innermost self is the way to replace that emptiness with a fullness that is so grand.

    2. I, too, can re-iterate that what is described here is a mirror of me and, “where doing is used relentlessly to cover up the huge chasm of emptiness that would be felt the moment the doing ceases” was such a familiar feeling and I could not have imagined that the answer lay all the time within myself. Serge Benhayon, like for so many, was the mirror in which I learn to see myself in truth.

  34. “Is this all there is to life? There has to be more.” So many of us ask ourselves this question and go on a quest seeking high and low for the answer. Serge Benhayon presents the truth that the answer has been there inside us all along waiting for us to re-connect to the inner truth of who we are.

  35. When you’ve gone from hiding to claimed, you just have to get out there and offer inspiration to others to do same! It seems to be the next natural step – and what better way than in a supermarket. I love your story Alison, thank you!

  36. This that are set up from young and at the time we see as simple and possibly insignificant. It’s like you start something and this sets in process a chain reaction that then needs to be continued in order to not see the start. You could say there are many choices where things changed or you could see it as one choice that then needed a similar choice again and again to justify or cover the first one. I can relate to this article and the start of the doing, it starts young and simple but by the time we grow we have made it a whole way of being in the world. It always comes to points where we can turn back and look what we have created or push ahead and keep going. More and more people are choosing to turn back or at least be aware enough to look over their shoulder. As the article is also saying, the turn back is well worth it and answers many questions which in the end is possibly only one question, who truly am I.

  37. I too was very good at doing from a young age and and being the peacekeeper and good daughter. All of these titles still gave me recognition for things I did and allowed me to put others needs well before my own for most of life. Saying no became apart of my new vocabulary and feeling more what will support me and how I move day to day offers me so much more freedom and the need to be recognised for what I do has diminished as I see how important it is to simply be me and move from that quality everyday to the best of my ability.

  38. I too was a little girl who wanted to join the ‘boys’ club’ which included lots of ‘doing’ in the world to prove my worth. Now what I do has purpose, and I have a much deeper connection to the woman I am. To the best of my ability, how I feel and where my body is at comes first, not what I think I should be doing to achieve an outcome.

  39. What can come with realising we are accountable to everyone is a greater sense of purpose and responsibility, an appreciation of ourselves and the interconnectedness of us all. I have been working in a shop for over two years now and I love how we support each other and work as a team.

  40. How lovely that the true you is emerging, ‘it is also bringing out the real me again – not the one that wants to please and be liked for what I am doing, but the loving woman who does care about humanity.’

  41. Being taught by life to be accountable to everything is a precious lesson. As love has to be equal across the board with everyone. No situation can ever be avoided, every choice matters.

  42. Many people live and have lived a life of doing, to get the recognition they crave, in the process they lose their real self, this in itself exposes this way of living is not true.

  43. It is a great point you make, that in all our doing we forget who we are. This is sad but true as in our obsession to be recognised through what we do, we have overlooked the reality that the greatest confirmation of who we are already resides within, and is with us everywhere we go and with whatever we do. There is no greater love to be found than the connection to the love that we already innately are within.

  44. It’s just amazing to be able to look back in life and see what you thought you enjoyed, and didn’t enjoy, and go ‘actually…’ and at the same time with no sense of regret or remorse – because now you do know what true joy is and you are choosing to live that instead. Beautiful, Alison.

  45. Serge Benhayon’s lived ways and powerful reflection offers humanity a way to live that is truly loving and joyful in every way – what a blessing it is to have this opportunity for us to equally choose this grand love and to live a true life.

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