by Amina Tumi, Age 31, Hair Salon Owner, London
Is it possible that we struggle to let Love in and in fact reject it?
This sounds crazy I know as all we want is to feel loved, (I know that is all I have ever wanted). Is it possible that part of us have been hurt so much in past experiences that we resist letting this happen again?
I have lived a life doing just that, not letting love in and I started to realise this recently, which made me ask the question “well, where has this gotten me?”.
I have isolated myself from people, telling myself that it is easier this way and when a person (friend, partner, family member, work colleague) hurts me, I would just cut them out of my life without a second thought, telling myself that it is great that I can walk away. However, the hurt does not go away and then I walk around with it along with the guilt of the way in which I had treated them.
I got to the point where I did not speak to any family members, did not have any friends and just had a partner where the same ongoing dramas would happen between us. If there was ever an argument or disagreement between us I would often purposely hurt him to make myself feel better, but I never actually felt better by doing this.
I was struggling with life and the people in it. I had ongoing issues with staff and family and felt that life was just too hard. There were good times but they never lasted and then there were the forced excited times that just felt fake and looking back they absolutely were, but at the time they gave an artificial lift and something to focus my energy on.
But with all of this going on I could feel that there must be more to life than this. Looking back now I can see clearly that I overrode so many opportunities of being the true joyful loving me I know I truly am. In the past I did not feel good about myself and would use my looks to get attention from boys/men so that I could feel better, but this never lasted and so I had to try harder and harder to keep this up. I spent a lot of time making myself look beautiful and sexy so that I would be looked at and this meant I would get my fix and then when I needed another fix I always knew exactly what to do, this became like a drug to me and one that I would use often.
I had moments of feeling naturally beautiful not about the outside but just when I let myself be, but I would then let the ideals of what society refers to as beautiful override what I knew was true, which is that true beauty comes from within. Most of what I was seeing around me was showing me you need to look beautiful on the outside in order to be beautiful on the inside. These messages from society are without a shadow of a doubt so far from the truth. Even though I could feel this, I scarily, even strongly considered getting a nose job and a boob job. Thankfully I did not have money at the time for this and was scared about the pain that this would entail. But what this does expose is how far away from my own Self-Love I had walked away from.
Now looking back I can see that had I been loving towards myself, many of my relationships with family / friends / partners / colleagues would have been very different, so different in fact that I may have saved myself and others some huge hurts that I am now working through.
What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place – wouldn’t we then be able to recognise when Love was coming our way based on our own understanding of what Love truly is?
The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
We resort to what has been our experience with love regarding others to justify the relationship with love we have established on our own.
‘What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place’. We are love which means we do not have to look for love ‘out there’ in the world, rather we just have to look within, and connect with our bodies and the communication/messages they send us continually. We have all the answers within to whatever life presents us with.
Its funny – when we find a successful strategy to get our ‘fix’ of attention, whether that is making yourself look beautiful, success, abject failure, drama…. the list is a pretty long one and have all dipped in and selected a few. But its tiring, to always have to try, to perform to get the attention. Its a vastly different experience to just ‘being’. Being all of ourselves that we naturally are and feeling the confidence of not trying to be anything else.
‘They guarantee that we live a hurt life’… very beautifully put, for this is exactly what happens, and the person who suffers the most is the one who has put all the fortresses of protection up. If we don’t let our fellow brothers in, we don’t let ourselves in, and we cut ourselves off from love. It is the most painful to be.
Beautiful honest and so true its amazing how we are all love yet somehow are always looking for it out side us when we are love and simply have let it in and let it out lovingly as with our breath our very essence connected to.
You describe the majority of the population here Amina… the desperate insatiable search for distraction, so that we don’t ask ourselves these questions that are always lurking around us – have we truly loved? And are we being love?
Love is the essence of what we are made of, but because we live so far away from this quality, we need to medicate in more and more extreme ways. All along, we push ourselves further and further from what we seek most, as love can only be when there is honesty, a willingness to open up and delve into the truth of all things.
We put so much effort into not being love. It is crazy but it seems that there’s too much allure in being this individuated person than surrendering into what we are already. Maybe it is too simple and too easy.
Amina I agree, it is totally crazy that all we all want is love but yet we all too easily allow our hurts and our reluctance to heal them to prevent us feeling that love.
There is so much about love that we have denied ourselves by putting it into the many pictures, beliefs and deeds, instead of letting us feel love from our heart in every moment, in everything that we do.
Love is so complicated when we try to understand all these concepts, pictures etc… and yet so simple to feel. Is it love – yes or no.
Amazing Amina, and may I add that sometimes our love-less-life is about our ability to critique or judge another coming from our own selfless-worth. What Love truly is comes from us first and starts with a self-loving relationship, which definitely never has any form of judgement or comparison, within and with others.
Beautiful said Amina.. We need to connect to simply being us and surrender to our hearts. For the answer always lays within.. The calmness can come out when we let our truth be, which simply is our connection to our wholeness (Soul).
When we expect and crave love from others we are in constant judgement and tension that it won’t last but when we feel within ourselves the Love that we naturally are we can choose to appreciate the equal love in another.
“I began to feel myself, not numbness or sadness or pain.” A beautiful reflection on discovering the innate beauty within when we chose to reconnect to who we truly are.
When we let go of the ideals and beliefs that we hold on to, we are able to begin living the love we are, it is only a matter of making a self loving choice to choose love first.
There are some really great points here, including “What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place..” We do have Love available to us at any time via being connected to our inner essence, yet we are taught to look outside of ourselves for love, wait for The One, and settle for attention and recognition. A great read Amina, lots to consider here, thank you.
Relationships can unfold into their true potential when we take out the needs, wants and expectations we may carry for another to meet. Giving everything we have to ourselves first is key to giving and sharing with others.
Rachael this is so true, we can enter into arrangements where needs and expectations are met, or we can claim ourselves as Sons of God and feel the purpose that’s is there between two people. I can feel how arrangements and neediness comes from the emptiness of disconnection, but when we are in our fullness, complete and in connection to all that we are the purpose for relationships is never about self, but for the all.
Being love, who we are in essence, is what feels most natural to us and when we are moved by love we feel the freest. It seems crazy that we then choose to separate from the one quality that defines and expresses the truth of who we are.
I am returning to truly being love, to being the love that I am, so I agree with what you share here, ‘What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place’.
I have heard those words ‘love yourself’ so often but it took me a very long while before I actually started to grasp what they really meant. It has been my experience that developing a loving relationship with myself first then led to more loving open relationships with others.
I can relate to running away from love as it knocks on your door – a door that is designed to be open in the first place! Opening up to love is easy when we begin by loving ourselves first.
I can relate to running away from love as it knocks on your door – a door that is designed to be open in the first place! Opening up to love is easy when we begin by loving ourselves first.
As complex as life can seem it can be as simple as honouring your truth / love.
“Most of what I was seeing around me was showing me you need to look beautiful on the outside in order to be beautiful on the inside.” It’s crazy isn’t it. I’ve struggled with this for much of my life, but now understand and feel within myself the beauty that is inside me, which blows the need to look beautiful on the outside out of the water. When someone is connected to their essence, their divine spark, they radiate and emanate beauty that is out of this world. It makes me realise how the beauty ideals we have created in every culture and society are deliberately set up to prevent us from feeling the truth of beauty and that we all hold it within, because in feeling this, we feeling our power and magnificence and are no longer pliable beings that can be manipulated and controlled.
‘What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place’. Beautifully said and very true Amina, so many are craving love and when we let go of any hurts or protection we have used to keep love away we allow the space to feel a deeper form of love and connection.
One thing that is coming up for me at the moment is how little I have let the love from others in. I have noticed that there is a certain amount I will say yes to but never it all. It all comes from protection and the level of love that I have for myself. If I don’t love myself and feel all that I offer, how can I trust that another could love me? I’ve been measuring how much they love me by how much I love myself. If I loved all of me I would then feel the immense love all around me.
Society does seem to value external looks over inner beauty but in my view and my experience, this outside way of living does not deliver the happiness we are promised in return. No amount of recognition or adoration from others can heal a lack of self-love within. It has to come from within us and from our reconnection to the love that is innate first. Then we can live a life built on a foundation of love and in fact experience joy rather than mere happiness.
Wise words Amina. When we lash out at others it doesn’t truly heal anything but instead isolates us and separates us further. There is nothing for it but to heal our own hurts for until we do, we will continue to feel and be run by their pain.
We yearn for love and deeply so but what we do not understand is that it is the love that we are. We simply yearn for that what we are in essence made of but do not live. So, as you so beautifully and honestly describe, it comes back to every single one of us to accept the love that we are and treat ourselves with every step more with this love that we so very much deserve.
Yes for sure Amina If we love ourselves we can feel love coming our way as we are love. Hurt and guilt keep us from feeling the love that we and others are.
I really appreciate your honesty and openness here, Amina. So inspiring. I can feel how I sat on my entitlement, asking the world to show me the love I was not bothering to be in.
A deeply honest exposure of what in part all of us are guilty of in some form or another… all the while controlled by our hurts, focusing on chasing what we want outside of ourselves at the expense of all, especially ourselves. How gorgeous to overcome this and to let go of the struggle and simply just be the love you already are.
Love your honesty Amina, because in that we discover that how we have been living, acting and behaving has not been who we truly are and then we can take steps to make loving changes in our relationship. Moving to another country away from all family and friends has been glaringly obvious that whatever hurts or issues I ‘think’ I can move away from, are constantly with me until they are understood and healed.
I was observing 2 friends talking and I could really feel how much love they were holding each other in, and themselves – and there was a deep trust and care between them that have been developed over time, and love definitely was the currency. It was not what they were saying that made me feel that, and there was no hugging or touching, but there was intimacy. It really was revelatory to experience that.
I’m learning to drop the hardness and protection too.. and to see how many shapes and sizes this comes in – the perfectionism, the drive, the control.. all of this is designed to keep me safe and protected, yet all it does is keep me isolated and separated from others. As I learn to drop these, and to feel more from my body instead of being in my head the whole time, I let my guard down and others in.
Its when we let others in that the love and the warmth come back into life, and the struggle is finally allowed to drop away.
Knowing you now Amina, there is so much to appreciate about how far you have come and how much love you have let into your life since you wrote this blog.. and how this has happened because you have taken the time and worked on loving you, first.
“Looking back now I can see clearly that I overrode so many opportunities of being the true joyful loving me I know I truly am.”
I can so relate Amina, I at times walked around so miserable, kind of showing it off in the hope that someone would notice and connect to me, but of course it is not much fun to connect to the walking dead. Whenever I got the slightest attention I was ready to give myself away completely as I was so desperate for recognition and acceptance. It never occurred to me that if I engaged people and let more of me to be seen on the outside people can see my innate beauty and naturally love and care for me.
Thank you Amina for your honest blog and asking questions which deeply resonate within All.
Thank you Amina for expressing so honestly, I love these words. “What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place – wouldn’t we then be able to recognise when Love was coming our way based on our own understanding of what Love truly is?” so simple.
Most of us are not really good in truly loving ourselves! For me this is one reason why the world is how it is today . . . what if we would all start to truly love ourselves? Perhaps we could change the world like you did with writing this wonderful and honest blog Amina. You are an inspiration and role model for all to see and feel.
Amina, the saying ‘you can only love another if you love yourself’ is so true. How is it that the vital ingredient to love being in the world, which starts with each of us, is not the primary thing to learn in life? It is time to turn the world on its end, and your article opens the much needed conversation to do so.
Beautiful to re-read Amina. “What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place – wouldn’t we then be able to recognise when Love was coming our way based on our own understanding of what Love truly is?”
When we walk away from relationships holding our hurts we are choosing hurt over people we actually love. We miss out on them and all they have to offer and they miss out on us and all we have to offer. We all miss out on life. We have nothing to lose by opening up to love but our hurt. A great sharing Amina.
I have found over the years that the more I love myself the less I fear whether someone else is going to love me or not.
One of the great sadnesses of humanity is that so many live life without realising that the true love they so long for is there within them waiting for us to open the door to our own inner-heart to let love out and to let love in.
Thank you Amina. I have often thought that to leave something as it is and not sort it out with the other person was perhaps the best way (maybe they didn’t want friendship with me any more) but I felt uncomfortable about this, and in most cases have been able to heal the situation from my side, but not all. So I have some work still ahead of me. To sort something in a loving way is so much more worth it. Having learnt to not pass judgement on others , through the teachings of The Ancient Wisdom presented by Serge Benhayon has been something I treasure.
That’s a great point you bring up, it is the love for puddle that makes it able to feel love from others, when this self love isn’t there the only thing we can call love is attention, but that is so far removed from the the true love we all know deep within our hearts.
I carried the belief for a long time that people just hurt you, therefore I kept people at a safe distance, basically I shut the world out….. thinking this would protect me from further hurt. Truth was, I was miserable and desperately desired connection with others, but was unable to connect because of the ingrained pattern of not trusting people. In the last 5 years, I have worked on my lack of trust issues, and now can say, I trust in myself and all the support that naturally comes my way by keeping my heart open and letting people in.
It has taken me a long time, but I too am finally letting love into my life….. great to revisit this blog and I feel I could have written it, there are so many similarities.
It’s funny how many people would re-interpret your title to mean you are finally letting love, as in relationships, into your life. The word love comes with so many preconditioned ideas, it’s amazing to actually see and claim that love begins with us, and it is actually possible to have love regardless of who you are or are not with.
It is a beautiful question you ask in the last paragraph, and I am sure it is true. I can very much relate to what you share here, and can see that holding out on relationships with people, not truly letting love in is not the way. And as you share how can we truly know love when we choose to withdraw, and don’t allow love in even for ourselves. It is exposing but true, and I can see it is always a beautiful opportunity to feel this, and know we always have a choice to change the path we are on, to one back to who we truly are.
I have in the past walked away from friendships or the opportunity for relationships. The thing is you can never really walk away, it always remains like a trigger that can be turned on whenever you become aware of that familiar feeling. Since choosing to be more loving towards myself and the flow on effect to be more open and loving towards others, it has become much easier to observe and not absorb and therefore not be effected by, or judgemental of others, for I know that we are all equal and deeply loving beings, even if we don’t express it.
Thank you Amina for so honestly sharing, love is who we are and have always been even though the way we have lived in the past has not shown this. But now, knowing that who we are is love, this can be our way of expression.
Love how You expressed this. A deep breath just came up. Thank You dear.
What struck me in your blog Amina was the vulnerability you felt from giving your power away to the outside world to provide you with the love you were seeking and the fact that it could never fully satiate, merely provide a fix. We’re so protective of not feeling vulnerable when in fact the true irony is that striving for invulnerability keeps us in protection.
Even though we can pin an issue/hurt to an event or person, walking away does naught. Walking away only creates distance one day you will have to return to confront and heal.
Amina, lovely to read your very honest blog. It is very easy to react and cut people out of our life when they hurt us, because we take it personally. What if we were to understand that it is because of the energy they choose to align to, the hurt is then less painful when we understand that everything is energy, and everything is because of energy. It becomes easier not to personalise people’s actions or reactions.
“I have isolated myself from people, telling myself that it is easier this way and when a person (friend, partner, family member, work colleague) hurts me, I would just cut them out of my life without a second thought, telling myself that it is great that I can walk away. However, the hurt does not go away and then I walk around with it along with the guilt of the way in which I had treated them.”
This is true Amina – the pain and hurt doesn’t go away but resurfaces in our next friendship or relationship for us to look at and heal. Thank you for sharing so openly and honestly. Much of what you’ve said I can relate to.
‘Now looking back I can see that had I been loving towards myself, many of my relationships with family / friends / partners / colleagues would have been very different, so different in fact that I may have saved myself and others some huge hurts that I am now working through.’ Thank you Amina for your honesty and the exposing of the way we try to protect ourselves from getting hurt and end up further away from love than ever. Like you I am now building my self love and this has had a beautiful impact on all my relationships as I become more willing to let go of my layers of protection.
We harden to protect ourselves and yet that is the very thing that is harming us. Realising this can often bring up another hard approach of addressing it (going into the ‘I’m bad’ punishing spiral) but that again is just another game and MORE hardness. However Love simply loves and it doesn’t harden or punish for the hardness or punishing, it simply loves. Detaching from the hardness, hurts and the protection and accepting the love that we are brings out that love. We live with these hurts for so long we then believe they are us, but as you write Amina – where has it gotten us? if it were true and ‘natural’ why does it hurt so much?
Everybody wants to be deeply loved and appreciated but instead protect themselves with layers of behaviours to keep others out from the fear that they may be hurt. But in truth, feeling the reality of a hurt is often way less painful than living in the fear of actually being hurt. Great blog Amina.
Great wisdom in your comment Suse
Everybody wants to be deeply loved and appreciated but protect themselves with layers of behaviours to keep others out – for fear that they may be hurt. But feeling the reality of a hurt is often way less painful than living in the fear of actually being hurt. Great blog Amina.
Interesting sharing thank you. Why do we struggle letting love in if that’s who we are deep down, and why do we struggle sharing this truth with others? Maybe we are just caught in a huge illusion that wants to keep us from feeling and knowing this? I too was so terrified of letting others in but when I began to do so my whole life turned around and has never been better.
I can relate very much to struggling with love and in fact rejected love because underneath I felt unworthy of love. I had so many hurts, I kept people at a distance including family, friends, partners….. I could not allow people to get close, for if I did, they might hurt me…. so I became the lone rider through life. If I too had been able to be more loving to myself I too would not have accumulated so many hurts and I would not have hurt others…. aah hindsight……today, I am open for learning and growing, and as such I am learning to express from love which is having a positive impact on all my relationships, including the one with myself.
Great to re-read your blog again Amina. It is a curious paradox that we reject the very thing that we all want most in the world. It feels to me that even though we know that we want love more than anything else in the world, we get a bit confused as to where that love is going to come from. When we expect others to bring us love or show us love to make us feel complete we are setting ourselves up because we will sometimes get it and feel satisfied and sometimes not and feel hurt. So it is an ongoing gamble and risky game that many of us decide is just not worth the pain, stress and the hassle playing and so we give up on it altogether. But if we start from deeply loving ourselves as our most important relationship and living life from there then from my experience it takes all the angst and risk out of it because we have all the love we could possibly wish for and then we can naturally share this love with others and not expect or demand anything in return.
When I read this, what came to me was the sense of responsibility that you have become aware of concerning what we ourselves put out into the world and how we treat ourselves. I particularly felt this when I read about how you felt you treated others to avoid being hurt, being honest and taking responsibility for how we have not been loving is awesome. So often we try to avoid the yucky bits of our lives and choices and yet being honest about them and letting them go is the only way to heal and move on. Living from Love, and knowing the Love within ourselves is the place to start and we will know it when it comes ‘our way’
It’s a beautiful home-coming when we are able to admit to ourselves that we are resisting love just as much as we want it. It’s a really crazy setup we have created and trapped ourselves in – while the truth is just simply there patiently waiting for us to fall back into it.
Its a deeply humbling blog Amina – your rawness and honesty can be felt, and of course I can feel some of the same patterns in myself. I was particularly struck by the little snippet about forced good times – I recognise that… putting alot of effort into having a good time, when if I just let go of my inhibitions, my past hurts and be natural the good time is effortless and can be shared with everyone!
It can seem so easy and sensible to cut people off when they hurt us, yet that can be such a lonely place and our hanging on to the idea of being right then gets in the way of all our relationships. Being the love that we want and letting people in is the greatest blessing. It means being very courageous and dropping that armour yet the rewards are endless.
I am working on dropping that armour. Each time I do, more comes up to be felt and that must melt away too. It is a work in awareness and I feel amazingly supported to do this by all of you who are doing it too.
Such an open an honest blog on how we look outside ourselves for love, without success or satisfaction. True love is an energy that we connect to within ourselves and then within everyone else – so far from what is reflected to us is from magazines, movie and TV.
Great question Amina. Feeling the love we are dissolves any need to have it shown or (in my case) proven, by someone else. This is something I find I have to constantly build upon.
Thank you for sharing your exploration in uncovering the ‘What is not’ in your life Amina. Very honest and insightful. More and more as I make the choice to go deeper in observing my own old patterns and playing out old belief systems, I am realising I have hardly scratched the surface. Going into the past to examine ‘old’ hurts brings up anxiety and I realised all I really need to do is let all the past go and observe the current moment. When something comes up in the current moment, it is then that I nominate it and change that pattern. This is allowing me to live more of the love i am and clearing old ‘stuff’ in the current time. It is a commitment to me, the love that I am, and a commitment to the love all others are. Challenging and inspiring blog about being honest and finding, and living the re-connection to who we truly are.
What a revealing and honest blog Amina! Your openness is so powerful and helped me to understand more why women are doing e.g. this nose correction even if it is so painful.
I too was also always looking outside to find love.The thing was that I did not find a true role model for loving myself in the past until I met Natalie Benhayon. Now you are an inspirational role model as well – how wunderbar is that.
Amina a very open and honest article. How often we have expected love from the outside, only to be disappointed because it is really a reflection of our lack of love inside. When we build that love inside ourselves not only do we offer a completely different reflection back to others, we are also open to true love from another.
Amina your openness and honesty is inspiring as is what you have shared – thank you. What stood out for me with was that it doesn’t matter how far away we walk away from love, our love is always waiting for our return, with its warm embrace and no judgment. And yes I agree ‘that feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place’ – beautifully said. And sharing this love with others offers a reflection that there is another way to live with true love in our society, and that this way is possible when we love ourselves first.
Amina, thank you for your very open, honest and powerful blog, it has given me plenty to ponder on.
I can feel your sweetness and natural love of people in this blog Amina. It reminds me how important it is to let people know we love them. When we hold back our naturally loving expressive way we hurt ourselves and extend the reach of whatever painful scenario we are holding on to. Thank you for sharing so sweetly and powerfully here.
Wow, you changed so much… if someone can change like that to how you are now, then the world should be asking questions. There is something about Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine that is changing lives in a way that seems like miracles. In the blog we know it’s not just a miracle though – it’s about your choices in life.
Great honest blog Amina Tumi and you raise perhaps the ultimate condundrum of life -why do we avoid and reject the very thing we want most in the world? It does not make sense unless we have given up on the existence of true love or the possibility of being love ourselves and so instead settle for stimulation, recognition, attention and approval from others believing that that is as good as it gets. Reconnecting to the fact that we are always love in essence first before anything else breaks this cycle and allows us to let love back into our lives again.
-why do we avoid and reject the very thing we want most in the world, is a great question. Where does it start, as in at what point in our lives do we reject love? For me, I feel I rejected love when as a small child I was not met or seen by my father, so I felt less, made myself less, thus that was the moment I hid and held back my love….and ever since more hurts accumulated and left me searching for love outside of myself…. to reconnect back to the love that I am, I have had to clear all those, ‘unloving choices’ I made in my journey through life which did not happen over- night, but as been well worth the effort.
Your honesty is really beautiful and allowed an opportunity to reflect on where I too have experienced or created hurt for another in my search to find love outside of myself. I am deeply grateful to Universal Medicine for showing me that in loving ourselves deeply first and expressing and sharing that with others, we cannot only be spared from the struggle and allow the gentle healing of what we chosen without regret, but also have the love that we always erroneously searched outside ourselves for.
Thank you Amina! Totally agree with you, life could have been tremendously different had I chosen love. Love for me was something that always came from the outside, yet that for the most part did not come anyway. Not that I was out of the picture, but I was not as I know I can be now. Beauty and life did not mix well. In the last few years, I have started allowing love into my life. The re-imprinting is far from over but I have to appreciate how far I have come.
The path you are on Amina is truly worth sharing. We are lost when we have those big expectations of others, and when we value ourselves and feel the warmth of our loving heart there is no neediness from others. They get the whole package from us and how blessed are they!
It’s so true Bernadette the burden of our expectations on others only creates neediness and disappointment.
‘I am finally letting love into my life”….. Love the title and yes I finally am letting love into my life, after a life time of cutting myself off from love… it is heaven to come home to the love that was just waiting for my return.
That’s it Jacqueline – it seems so hard, but just to let the love in has an amazing effect. Deeply painful to realise all the missed opportunities, but the turnaround is profound almost instantly once we do commit to letting the love back in.
‘What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place – wouldn’t we then be able to recognise when Love was coming our way based on our own understanding of what Love truly is?’ Yes, absolutely. Everything that we express out will return to us, so it is the love that we allow ourselves to be that will return to us.
This is a beautiful, honest blog. Being the love that we are makes everything simple in life. Letting go of investments to others, how they should be is the hardest thing, but worth to focus on. Feeling me and honouring myself in everything, helped me drop expectations towards others. Not perfect, but I am on my path of being me and letting all my love out 🙂
Beautiful Amina. I can certainly relate to cutting people off when the going gets tough. I always come around eventually, realise that I created the issue in the first place and have been missing out on what is actually a great connection.
Amina, truly amazing blog, thankyou for sharing. I really love the final quote; “What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place – wouldn’t we then be able to recognise when Love was coming our way based on our own understanding of what Love truly is?” By being the love that we are we can also walk away from abusive and unloving behaviour without feeling crippled or crushed, as we can allow people to be where they are but know the source of love we truly seek is right there within us, and in them for their own selves too. It’s a totally different way to relate. I really appreciate your story, it’s provided a lot of inspiration and understanding for my own life, thankyou Amina.
I can really relate to what you say here Amina, especially this paragraph – “Now looking back I can see that had I been loving towards myself, many of my relationships with family / friends / partners / colleagues would have been very different, so different in fact that I may have saved myself and others some huge hurts that I am now working through.”
I really liked the question you posed “Is it possible that we struggle to let Love in and in fact reject it?” as this indeed is what many of us struggle with. I for one have allowed hurts to keep my love from others as well as myself, and it does indeed isolate. It feels so important to begin to share stories like yours, as it offers us all an opportunity to reflect, feel and begin to consider that there could be another way. That maybe it is possible to let love in, that maybe in fact I am love.
I agree Jade that it is so important to share stories like this as a reflection of how it is possible to turn your life around by starting to let love in.
Amina, I can relate to what you have written. When we blame others for how we are we will always be isolated from love as we keep everybody out just in case we could get hurt. So it is a bit of a vicious circle we can find ourselves in. I have found that opening up to the other in the sense of allowing myself to understand where the other person is coming from has helped me a lot to let go of my hurts.
I can relate to so much in this blog Amina. I led a life of not letting people in, because I did not trust anyone, and I held the belief that if I kept people at a distance, I would not get hurt…. ah, the only person who did get hurt by keeping everyone away was myself, as I chose to stay in hiding, thus all my relationships were a huge struggle. As I developed a relationship with myself (started to self care and self love), all my relationships improved significantly as a result of attending courses and presentations by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.
This is lovely to read Marika, I have become aware recently that I can hold myself hard and not let people in and not allow myself to be loved, it is really supportive to read how ‘In recent months I have been seeing and dropping a lot of the protection / hardness in my body and starting to let people in… to let them see the sweetness of me. It’s quite a lovely unfolding and so effortless expressing the loveliness of me.’ A very practical way for me to understand how to allow myself to let people in.
Thank you Amina for a very honest and open article, I am sure many people will be able to relate to what you have written.
Hi Amina, your last sentence is so true and shows how simple the process is, but how we can complicate things by using past hurts to keep people out.
The last sentence is indeed quite magical. It is beautiful Amina that you had the awareness of what true beauty was even if you couldn’t always hold on to it. It is a great place to come back to, to know we are worth much more than our outer appearance and that in building that appreciation of ourself we have so much more of us to bring.
A lovely sharing, your honesty leaps off the page.
Wow Amina that closing statement is JUST IT. Of course we would know exactly whether what is heading our way is Love or not if we allowed ourselves to express our natural Love from within. This makes PERFECT SENSE. I will treasure this statement and it HAS INSPIRED me to BE the Love that I know I am.
Hi Amina, thank you, much of your story resonated deeply within me and I love the simplicity of the last sentence: “What if feeling loved was as simple as just being the Love that we are and expressing from that place – wouldn’t we then be able to recognise when Love was coming our way based on our own understanding of what Love truly is?”
It sounds crazy that we actually run away from love, even though it is the thing we crave most in life…
I spent years running, then one day someone offered me true Love, and rather than see it as Love, I saw it to be to be the complete opposite of Love, so I ran even further until the running became so painful, that the next time I saw Love I knew it to be Love.
Now I spend my days building that Love from within to the best of my ability. Life is much more enjoyable this way.
Beautifully expressed. I can so relate. I am learning to love myself – at last!
Thank you Amina, you have clearly demonstrated how we/society blindly complicate and make hard work, something so simple and beauty-full, that we want more than anything – even though it is there the whole time… love.
Thank you for your openness and honesty, Amina. “Have we truly loved? Have we truly been love?” These are big questions, worthy of deep inner reflection – not just for the repercussions for ourselves, but for everyone.