Have you ever stopped – looking in a mirror to enjoy a true reflection – or is it just a glance to make sure your make-up or hair is ok?
I remember one day being asked just that; “do you look at yourself in the mirror, or is it just a glance?” Of course, I thought, I always look in the mirror – or did I?
Sure I would look in the mirror but never was I really looking at me – I was looking at a mere shadow of myself which was then presented to the world.
It was time to start looking past the facade that I had created to protect and hide myself from the world; to allow myself to see the true me. It was an awkward and at times uncomfortable process – making myself stop and look at what was being reflected back to me.
Funny really, as I worked as a hairdresser so I was in front of mirrors all day every day, and yet it was easy to avoid looking at myself, making it all about the client.
There was no admiration or adoration of myself. I would look in a mirror and not liking what I saw, I would instead choose to make every glance about something else. For example, when trying on clothes I never looked at myself but looked at and admired the clothes I was trying on – never once stopping to admire the person that was wearing the clothes. The body and person under the clothes were just that… there was no appreciation or connection to me, just an observation of the reflection of what I saw in the mirror.
So the process unfolded on many levels, keeping it simple to start with and taking time to actually look at myself when I was in front of the mirror. Not unlike what can be observed when a child looks at themselves in the mirror… you can see the way they admire and adore themselves with each and every glance.
Before long I was beginning to see the true essence of me coming through – the facade was beginning to drop away and I was no longer afraid of how I presented to the world.
I began to dress for me, not the world or the mirror; my make-up was applied to my face in a way that supported the natural glow that was now emanating.
As this unfolded I started to enjoy walking past a mirror and slowly began to appreciate the woman I was becoming – or what I should say is that I was now allowing the woman I had always been, out.
I did not stop to consider the amazing beauty I had concealed from myself and the world – I only knew that the hurt I had been protecting myself from was actually coming from me. I was hurt because I had been hiding this awesome reflection and every time I looked in the mirror the sadness was felt. I did not like what I saw – what I was looking at was not me and it hurt. The pain of living a shadow of who I truly was hurt more than any hurts the world or humanity could ever impose upon me.
I have been nurturing, embracing and loving the person I am – without any expectations or comparisons to another.
Over time, with this nurturing I have blossomed and continue to blossom every day with more and more acceptance for myself.
It was this simple question from Serge Benhayon about the way I looked at myself in a mirror – or not – many, many years before, that began my process of self-acceptance; a process that has been nothing short of a true transformation. No plastic surgery, wonder pills or diets, just a commitment to allowing myself to connect to, live and express me.
I now live each day appreciating the woman I am, continuing my expansion of self for all the world to see.
With the hurts falling away and the real me shining through, why would I not want to stop, and looking in a mirror, see a true reflection of glorious me.
By Nicole Serafin, Age 42,Tintenbar, Australia