Pleasures of Life or Distractions

Several years ago, there came a day when I realised that I was just going round and round in circles in my life, and for all my ‘doing’ and ‘searching’, nothing ever changed. I had not improved or bettered myself, because that was the belief I held: I had to do better, I had to improve myself, I had to push, I had to do, do, do. It was this belief that kept me feeling that I was not enough as I was, and kept me in the search of looking outside of myself for the answers.

It was at this time that I had the good fortune to meet Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. For the first time ever, I felt the truth in my body of what he was presenting; that is, I felt that everything presented I already knew on some level but had not as yet integrated into my life. What struck me the most was that there was another way to live life and that I was enough exactly as I was, as everything I needed was inside me. This had a profound effect on me.

Pleasures of MY life – Making the Choice to Stop ‘Doing’

Slowly, I made the choice to stop ‘doing’ and ‘searching’. I began to look at all aspects of my life, and the various activities I was ‘doing’, which included:

  • Eating sugar and comfort foods – including gluten and dairy rich foods
  • Attending 5 day a week intensive yoga programs
  • Reading self-improvement and science fiction books
  • Watching lots of TV
  • Drinking Coffee.

I used to regard all these things as my pleasures in life that I would look forward to, spent a lot of money on and which took up all of my time. I came to realise they were all distractions as they all kept me in the ‘doing’ and kept me from the knowing inside that I was enough. With this new awareness, my ‘pleasures in life’ started to fall away one by one.

I took a break from yoga and meditation for a few weeks and never went back. Much later the awareness came that for all the yoga classes I took, I did not feel any more contentment or a deeper connection with myself. I still needed chocolate and lots of other stimulating foods which I was using to supplement my lack of energy and vitality. I realised that yoga was providing me with temporary relief from how constantly tired my body actually was, but not actually changing anything.

Similar to the yoga, I took a break from books and in particular, buying self-help books hoping to find the answers in these books of how to improve myself. Eventually, I put them all out. With the extra time I now had, I started to keep and write my own journal of experiences, realisations and insights which I’ve come to realise are so much more enriching and nourishing.

One such realisation was how I completely ignored the messages from my body when I was tired and needed to go to bed, yet I would stay up late watching TV and then feel exhausted in the morning. I now go to bed when I am tired and feel completely rested the next morning. Going to bed early had other positive impacts; I saw I was less emotional and this also reduced the need for the stimulants and distractions I was using to get me through my day. For instance, after some time on decaf coffee, I no longer felt the need to drink it.

Likewise with sugar and all foods I used for comfort – for example, cakes, biscuits, desserts, yoghurt, chocolate, bread, rolls, croissants. When I tried to give these up, I found it very challenging; I came to realise that I was addicted to sugar and that this had been one of my main pleasures in life. I had used sugar as a ‘feel good crutch’ and to numb myself from not feeling and dealing with the areas in my life that were not working. It was a slow process – it took two years to go sugar free – but well worth it.

Reconnecting To My True Self

Today I no longer feel heavy, dull, bloated and exhausted due to eliminating sugar and all comfort foods from my diet, along with the other changes I made. I lost weight, without going on a diet; my body feels lighter and clearer and I have much more energy, contentment, and joy for life.

This joy in my body helps me feel how sweet and gorgeous I truly am because I have reconnected to my inner beauty and stillness, which was always there, but before I was not able to connect to as ‘my pleasures in life’ kept me distracted from my true self.

I now have a deeper connection with my body as I have learned to respect and honour it with a new awareness that all my choices affect my body in some way or another.

The Gentle Breath Meditation

I have found great support in the Gentle Breath Meditation®, a five minute technique from Serge Benhayon that helps me re-connect back to myself: this is true quality time with myself which helps me feel that I am enough exactly who I am and that everything I need is inside me.

With this knowing I can therefore just ‘be’ who I truly am; no more ‘doing’, searching or improving myself as that belief no longer holds true. With that old belief, and many more cleared from my body, I gained the awareness that what I was searching for has always been within me, in my inner heart.

All my pleasures in life and distractions kept the door closed to my inner heart; my true home where my truth resides, where my stillness, innocence and beauty and love reside and also where true inner peace and joy is to be found.

Being and Connecting to my true self And Feeling Myself From the Inside out Is The Greatest True Pleasure in Life.

Deeply Inspired by the presentations and courses of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

By Jacqueline McFadden – Scotland

440 thoughts on “Pleasures of Life or Distractions

  1. When we start to look at what we distract ourselves with, it’s a pretty endless list. What I am finding is that things – activities, events, items on my to-do list, have their own space. When I stay steady and consistent, I feel what to do next and how to do it, and there’s enough time to do everything, even if it’s not in the way that I originally wanted to do it. We’re pretty good at using absolutely anything as a distraction that takes us away from what we’re actually feeling, but if we stay with our bodies, the things that we’re doing (if there’s the potential for steadiness and stillness already within the activity) can become tools that reconnect us, instead of distractions that take us further away.

  2. Much of what we consider as pleasures in life can actually be a distraction that feeds that insatiable drive to look outside ourselves for the qualities that lie within.

  3. No matter how hard or long the process of discarding takes we know it is worth it in the long run, what could be more beautiful than reconnecting to our inner beauty and stillness.

  4. It is impossible that someone who takes something as a pleasure can really see it for what it is. But the moment when we connect deeply with ourselves we become aware of how harmful are those things we consider pleasures. They stop us from evolving.

    1. Yes I agree Eduardo, when we are in connection we can see the true harm of our actions and distractions. Is that why many prefer not to connect to themselves? As you would need to be more responsible and aware of your movements.

  5. Beautiful blog Jacqueline. I still use the Gentle Breath practise sometimes to re-centre myself and find that it allows me to discard tension in my body and deepen the connection I have with myself. It lets me align to grace and feel the beauty in my movements. It’s like coming home.

  6. Jacqueline thank you for all you have shared here, I was as a teen addicted to sugar, I would not I have known though because it was so normal to eat sweets, cakes, biscuits and have sugary drinks. Later when I discovered the New Age spirituality and self help books I would say that improving myself became an addiction. It’s interesting that both of these things are very harmful yet they are very normal, even encouraged – depending on what the mind believes. That is why whole body intelligence is so vital for the next step in health and wellbeing for humanity, as despite what beliefs or ideals the mind may hold that may tell us something is good or healthy, the body does not lie about the true effects of the way we eat or exercise, and the body also communicates clearly about the true effects of our behaviours, thoughts, and emotions on the body.

    1. ‘Improving myself became an addiction’, same here Melinda, and in this ‘need’ and investment to better my life, I was not able to discern or feel what was true, but in actual fact I set myself up….to ignore or be ignorant to the fact that what I called pleasures were actually distractions to living a true and simple life – the Soulful Way. Why? I was not ready to take responsibility for my choices and the life I had created that took me way of track – that simple and that honest.

  7. Being honest about why we eat certain foods etc. is key to deepening our quality of life. We then get to enjoy all the benefits of such a deepening, which allows us to support others more deeply too.

  8. It is so ironic that our ‘pleasures’ to make us feel better, more comfortable, are in fact distractions which take us away from the gorgeousness we already are.

  9. What a great understanding you came to, ‘ that there was another way to live life and that I was enough exactly as I was, as everything I needed was inside me.’ and so you could let go of your old damaging beliefs and way of living.

  10. From what I see we all have a knowing there is something more then we are currently living it’s just that some have it hidden deeper than others. It’s not a judgment but more an appreciation and true equality. You are not just saying we all know but I’m better because I know, .you are saying it’s all there for all of us and if I see this then my responsibility is to allow others to see it. They may not need to walk the road I just walked on as it’s is only about the quality of that true return.

  11. This is GOLD Jacqueline – “Being and Connecting to my true self And Feeling Myself From the Inside out Is The Greatest True Pleasure in Life.” Claiming this as a foundation sets yourself up for a path of truth. What I have realised further to this, with the true support from Serge Benhayon, is to be honest along the way to reduce and be aware of the distractions of earthly pictureous pleasures ie. “I was not able to connect to me as ‘my pleasures in life’ kept me distracted from my true self.”

    1. Spot on Rik, honesty is the best medicine for making change. We paint our own canvas of life, and at any moment we can choose different colours and different expressions with eyes that are honest and humble.

  12. Setting aside the so-called pleasures of life for good is one of the most truly pleasurable things we can do. When the day finally arrives when we no longer need that glass of wine, cup of coffee, hard-on-the-body regime or whatever it is we’ve relied on, it is a joyful day indeed.

  13. Those things we seek and use keep us away from the treasures within, how very true and reading this today gives me a new understanding of how we rob ourselves with our props of feeling who we are, and the delicateness we are and bring.

  14. Many of us have been pushing ourselves to do, to better or improve ourselves, and as you say, nothing truly changes, and yes; what a blessing to come across Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine who has shown us there is a different way to live, ‘that there was another way to live life and that I was enough exactly as I was, as everything I needed was inside me.’

  15. Chocolate was one of my pleasures, as was exercise and reading self-help books. I used these things to manage my way through life, without really dealing with what was happening in front of my face. If you had said to me 10 year ago that I would willingly choose to stop eating chocolate, I would have laughed and said, ‘no way!’ It’s so true Jacqueline that the things we call our pleasures are actually distractions away from dealing with and feeling the pain of the issues we are burying and then allowing ourselves to feel the real beauty of who we are from the inside out.

    1. The pleasures are really the bandaids that make the misery of living without being connected to our true essence more bearable.

    2. Exactly Debra, who wants to give up chocolate, no way! What I have discovered is that when we are ready for change (which occurs in the openness and honesty that our life is not working the way it is) the teacher appears.. . and its like we are able to take of the shaded glasses and really see anew and from this space able to make different choices – one of them being giving up sugar and the once beloved chocolate as we begin to direct love towards ourselves. Self-love moves mountains!

  16. When we realise that nothing has truly helped to change a life for the better, we also realise that most of what is available in the form of modalities, advice, solutions and comforts are just numbing and distraction tools that take us further and further away from our essence.

  17. ‘All my pleasures in life and distractions kept the door closed to my inner heart’ – I had not looked at the distractions in this way before but this is true. Everything we overload the body with leaves less room for who we truly are.

  18. There are so many distractions built in to the Western style of living that the idea of even a few minutes of quiet contemplation time seems absolutely foreign. Such is the truth of how far we have moved away from a loving and supportive way of living.

  19. It is very humbling when we feel for ourselves that the many things we say we enjoy actually keep us from the true joy we already hold within, but have not known how to live. Learning to do this is in itself the greatest of pleasures, way better than chocolate and coffee.

  20. “What struck me the most was that there was another way to live life and that I was enough exactly as I was, as everything I needed was inside me.” As women we tend to have incredible self-worth issues and this can so easily turn us into machines, we can keep flogging ourselves and never reach the carrot dangling on the string in front of us. So many of us suffer from overwhelm and exhaustion as a result of this false and debilitating belief. Never feeling good enough-is a trick. It is not real and should not be taken seriously. It is an untruth and when it surfaces in our thoughts we need to be ready to catch it and throw back into the vast abyss from whence it came. We can then feel into our truth and appreciate our magnificence just for being and not for doing anything. We haven’t been educated this way in life so it is a challenge but it can be done.

    1. I agree Irena that we don’t appreciate ourselves enough and habitually focus on what we think we are lacking. As you say ‘Never feeling good enough-is a trick. It is not real and should not be taken seriously.’

    2. Thank you Irena, your whole comment was beautifully shared. I agree “Never feeling good enough – is a trick. It is not real and should not be taken seriously. It is an untruth and when it surfaces in our thoughts we need to be ready to catch it and throw back into the vast abyss from whence it came.”

  21. We spend our lives searching without and miss the treasures within while we do so, that voice in us, loving and always there and showing us through our body how we live affects it. And no matter what it never stops, and then when we strip away all the distractions and stimulants we are left with ourselves, and in our true nature we can live the treasure in us. It really is about bringing the inside out, but first we need to get rid of all the things we cluttered ourselves with on the outside.

  22. ‘…my pleasures in life’ kept me distracted from my true self.’ It’s a bit of an oxymoron (not sure if that’s the correct word), suggesting that pleasures come from outside of ourselves, things that we need to add onto or do to feel good, as opposed to connecting to our selves. It’s like we completely ignore the fact that we are already everything and so all these other things that tempt us away from that are what we choose to believe are what life is about, but it’s an illusion, because take those crutches away and what are we left with? Just ourselves, and if that’s an awful feeling, then isn’t that alarm bells for how we actually feel about the person we are, our true self?

  23. I love what you share here Jacquline on your change from reading self-help books into writing your own journals which in fact are more beneficial to your connection with your innermost then these self-help books were able to bring to you, as in fact they probably did the oposite.

  24. Sugar has become a major addiction for many people, the crutch that keeps many individuals going when we run out of battery power, yet it is a very short term fix that then requires copious amounts more to keep going, when we find a way of living without the need for sugar, we realise that it is possible to naturally reenergise ourselves as we are no longer being depleted by living in distraction.

    1. Sugar is not only to keep us going while we are tired and feel depleted, but in fact it is affecting on much more levels as well. Sugar is creating a constant nervous tension in our body that makes it difficult to come to that place of stillness we all hold and do need to visit regularly to maintain a healthy balance in our busyness.

  25. Beautifully expresses Jacqueline, when I look back at my life I was the queen of distractions and spent a lot of time, energy and money indulging in everything outside of myself to fill me up. Of course nothing ever worked until I meet Serge Benhayon and also discovered as you have this deep knowing and wisdom we all have within and how amazing life becomes when we connect to this immense love and then the need for any distractions and the continual searching just naturally fall away.

  26. Such a perfect blog to read as I start my day, thank you so much. I could feel my body want to change the way it was sitting and reading and as I honoured the call from my body I could feel my thoughts change and the pulse that I could feel in my body from the blood pumping round it changed too – less obstructions. clearer messages and thoughts. Great start to the day!

  27. Making the choice to stop doing and searching is so freeing and self nurturing; also deeply knowing and appreciating, that exactly who we are, is enough . Thank you Jaqueline for highlighting these points.

  28. Because we all feel in a way that the life we are living as a society is not it, we are looking for remedies and sometime distractions to what life is actually asking of us. Life is asking of us to return to a way of being that we naturally are from and deep down all have a remembering of. The only thing is that we rarely see a reflection of this way of being in our daily lives and that makes us wavering as we have lost the confidence in just being ourselves as the basis for our lives.

  29. Considering the high demand for yoga these days, one has to question if there is a real benefit to it? it seems that in order to not feel the discontent people are finding more ways to indulge and find distractions to keep them away from true responsibility and evolution. Just today I was reading about a new trend called Beiryoga which combines what they call ancient practices of drinking beer and yoga in order to find enlightenment? this is a total lie which offers absolutely no healing or communion with self, only keeping further and further from embracing our true essence within.

    1. You are right Francisco, yoga has been totally bastardised and it’s true meaning of ‘union’ has for the most part been replaced by a practise that is for relief and distraction. There is even stone yoga – people smoke marijuana whilst they perform poses, so I’m not surprised about the beer yoga. Esoteric Yoga is the pure essence of yoga – union with the body and our divine essence and living in that union everyday.

  30. “I realised that yoga was providing me with temporary relief from how constantly tired my body actually was, but not actually changing anything.” And this happens with so many things we do, we think they are good for us however they actually just give us a moment of distraction and relief without truly changing anything in our state of being.

  31. I love the opening paragraph of this blog because it shares the wisdom that the wheel of ‘self-improvement’ in truth has the effect of confirming the belief that we are not enough. The basic premise is, ‘I am not enough and I need to better myself’, negating the innate beauty and love that is within us all. It is my experience too, that letting go of such efforts, has been an important step in embracing who I truly am – and as Jacqueline shares here, this is ‘the greatest true pleasure in life’.

  32. Round and round in circles we go – the cycles of life being inescapable, we are asked to look at our choices, how that affects the way we live and how we can makes changes. We may condemn cycles and repetitions, but they are there to support us to learn and evolve.

  33. I find now that when we say “I am addicted” to something, it either supports us to find out why or offers an excuse to continue because well “I’m addicted”. It’s really more honest and truthful to ask ourselves ‘what exactly am I addicted to? Am I addicted to the rush of sugar; am I addicted to the relief or numbing of watching TV etc.’

  34. When our way to walk in life is based on ‘doing’ we are accepting to measure life, and us in it, based on our performance and to accept that the way forward is pretty much linked to the results we get. It is a whole way of moving through life.

  35. The key is that when we eat for comfort we dull ourselves and our senses – all of them. So we don’t feel the tensions in life but also not us and how delicious we are as you say here so beautifully: “This joy in my body helps me feel how sweet and gorgeous I truly am because I have reconnected to my inner beauty and stillness, which was always there, but before I was not able to connect to as ‘my pleasures in life’ kept me distracted from my true self.”

  36. We tend to think of pleasures as those moments when we allow ourselves to deeply enjoy life. Moments of freedom, of allowing, of feeling alive and surrendering to the fact that life is beautiful thanks to that which we choose.
    But, why do these choices bring so much to us? Because there is a need being met. Meeting it allows us to stop feeling what we were feeling in the first place about us. This is where the plus comes from. It helps us to avoid feeling in full what we are feeling.

  37. The more I make space in my life to stop and be still, and just be with me, without any distractions, the less I want the distractions in my life. Doing the gentle breath meditation every day has hugely supported this process of enjoying simply being with myself without any distractions: it creates space in my body that then plays out in the rest of my day, and it’s quite beautiful to feel this spaciousness within and around me.

    1. So true Bryony, I have the same experience. Every day I commit to sitting down on my morning break with a cup of tea and reading one of the purple books from Serge Benhayon. This brings me back to my stillness which greatly supports me when I go back out to work again. I have more awareness of my movements, and clock more quickly when my movements become driven or a little rushed…its a constant choice to move in stillness and a work in progress.

  38. I love how you have come to realise that certain pleasures in life kept you distracted from connecting to and embracing your true self… yet after letting these go have found ways to deeply support you to connect instead to the pleasures within and to live and emanate these daily for all to see how joyful life in connection can be.

  39. I agree Jacqueline, nothing outside of myself can come anywhere near to the feeling of connection to myself, everything and everyone yet I still choose to not live in this connection consistently. It is a choice and the more I observe and be honest with myself in the quality I choose to live in every moment to the best of my ability the closer I get to living my life in connection to myself.

  40. When we are in the ‘doing’, where exactly are we? It is clear that we are not settled in the body. The doing is the activity of that expression. We move with some level of anxiety, some nervous tension, some restlessness. The doing, on the other hand, is all that we do against ourselves to feed that unsettlement. It is not just an externally oriented activity.

  41. When we believe we are not enough exactly as we are, imperfections and all, we come from the basis of a lack. And from that lack we can tend to put pressure on ourselves to be what we are not.

  42. Reading this again today I can feel how much your story on how you used sugar as a crutch resonates very clearly, I know this so well, and right now I’m looking at how I do use sugar in various situations, and it’s a distraction as I’m not dealing with what I need to deal with, but instead getting my sugar fix. It’s amazing to get this understanding and start to unpick those areas where sugar is still very much in charge and how much that impacts me.

  43. We can get so lost in our pleasures we actually miss the gem that is us. And letting go our pleasures can be one of the most healing things we can do – we find ourselves.

  44. Finding pleasure in just being oneself is the greatest pleasure there is as everything else will be met and experienced with this inner contentedness and feeling enough.

    1. Beautifully said Esther – we don’t need any relief from life nor any treats, rewards or out time when we are being our full selves and living life in a quality that is true to the Soulfulness we are eternally part of.

      1. So very true, it just struck me again, how we then actually need less and less from the outside to content ourselves. How very simple and immensely awesome.

  45. Yes I can relate here to the challenge in giving up sugar. It took me some time also to break my addiction with sugar as I was also caught up in the exhaustion and anxiety cycle that would constantly mean I needed sugar to keep me going. It was only when I looked at the reasons why I was so exhausted all the time that my dependence on sugar started to shift.

  46. If you make your life about needing to get somewhere, then there will always be something to strive for, somewhere to get to – which in itself causes exhaustion and depletion of our natural essence. And of course we justify such an existence by convincing ourselves that life is all about the journey and not the destination, that we need to live in the moment – all supposedly wise words, until you realise that such words feed and support the very same restless form of being that we are trying to escape in the first place. That is not to say that life should be bereft of movement, or that there is nothing to be done. That “buddhist” way of thinking is in itself illusion and fallacy. Instead, what we need to ponder and look at is not so much the outcome of our movement or focus, but the quality of such. By that I mean, there is a certain quality of movement – connected to at first in the movement of gentleness – that actually supports us to remain vital and connected.

  47. That’s so true about the many therapies out there, Jacqueline, I’ve done the merry-go-round of various new age things, and nothing in any of them ever had an lasting impact on my life. Finding Universal Medicine has changed my life and the simplicity of it means I can take what I learn there and apply it in my life, I don’t need to run away to a mountain top or hide in a cave – I can be in the world living my life, working in a busy office and with the support of the many techniques I’ve learned including the Gentle Breath Meditation, I am now far more committed, and present in my day to day life and work. It has been and is an amazing journey.

  48. I can so relate to the list of comforts, pleasures and distractions you’ve shared Jacqueline. I used to have them too. I used to look forward to some sort of treat or reward during or at the end of my day because I felt something was lacking. I now realised, it was the lack of connection to myself that often led to cravings and the need to reward and comfort myself. Once I started living more connected to me, choosing to drop things that wasn’t supportive, especially certain foods that made me feel heavy and grumpy, I no longer felt exhausted. It is incredible how we choose to live affects us on all levels, it affects how we feel and it affects our relationships, with ourselves and others. I am now choosing to let go of things that were blocking my connection to me, constantly refining this and as a result, this supports me to deepen my connection and relationship with others.

  49. It’s hard to imagine when you are in the life style of distractions and pleasures that letting them go will make a huge difference to how you feel but it is totally true and no pleasure feels as good as being me.

  50. So great to be enjoying the new awareness felt with every choice made Jacqueline. That is the gold – the freedom that the body feels.

  51. Beautiful to re-read your post Jacqueline. “I now have a deeper connection with my body as I have learned to respect and honour it with a new awareness that all my choices affect my body in some way or another.” Our body does let us know – sometimes in subtle ways – what is going on. When we choose to stop and listen and then make new choices, the results can be astounding. This affects not only ourselves but everyone else as the ripples extend outwards.

  52. You know, the deeper I go in my relationship with myself – the more I feel open, loving and connected with others, and the less I feel to use the ‘go to’s’ of the past that would keep my life seemingly ‘full’, but devoid of true and deep connection. It’s great that you expose this with such honesty Jacqueline – how easily we lead lives on a treadmill of late nights, sugar and coffee for example, and yet, fail to recognise the richness of love within that our behaviours may actually be keeping us from.

    1. Beautiful what you share Victoria as this is also what I am experiencing. The deeper I connect with my body and/or relationship with myself, the distractions just drop away, so there is no effort or trying to give up something. And as my relationships develop and as I share more of myself, I am also finding that I need less of the ‘go to’s’, to find relief, and instead beginning to feel the richness and magic in connection with firstly myself and then with others.

      1. Very, very beautiful jacqmcfadden04. Life need not be a ‘descending spiral’ where we lose more and more connection with ourselves, need it. The full reverse is actually possible – and rich beyond measure. Very much appreciate your sharing here.

    2. Awesome sharing Victoria. I remember feeling exhausted and knew to some degree what I was doing was not loving, the late nights, consumption of sugar, and heavy glutinous foods wasn’t great for me but I continued to repeat these behaviours because I didn’t know how to let go of them. I felt it in my body that my choices we not supportive and everywhere I turned, everyone around me were making similar choices, so I use that to confirm my unloving behaviours instead of listening to my body. Now, with the inspiration of many people I have met at Universal Medicine, I am listening to my body more and more and allowing it to guide me through life. I am much more aware of not letting outside influences distract me from listening to my inner knowing, connecting to me and the wisdom of my body’s messages/intelligence.

      1. Such transformation is so commonplace amongst students of Universal Medicine chanly88. I experience the same myself. And this is no small thing, in a world where we tend to (predominantly) only further imbed in behaviours that do not support us in full, as time goes on… (our physical and mental health stats show that we ain’t, as a whole, doing so well…)
        It takes true courage and a willingness to go there, and look honestly at what we’ve set up in our lives that negates our bodies and the true light within, but the richness of allowing more love into our lives through the process can simply not be denied, can it… And we are all so deeply worth it.

  53. Just how many things do we regard as ‘pleasures’ – yet just scrape the surface a little, and many are actually devices we use to fill a ‘gap’ we don’t know how to fill.
    Re-connection to the essential nature of who we are is fundamental in restoring such a balance in life as you’ve experienced – without this, we are left flailing, and yes, so readily seeking of that which may fill our ‘gap’ or void, without the conscious awareness of why we’re doing what we’re doing, or even that it’s not necessarily truly loving at all. This is deeply inspiring Jacqueline, thank-you.

    1. I love how you have captured this in a nutshell Victoria, that when we lose connection with ourselves and our bodies: ‘we we are left flailing, and yes, so readily seeking of that which may fill our ‘gap’ or void, without the conscious awareness of why we’re doing what we’re doing, or even that it’s not necessarily truly loving at all’. The stakes are costly when we shut down/close off from who we truly are.

  54. Just this week I realised how much has dropped away, rather naturally when I started looking at what I do from inside instead of outside of myself. I still do lots of outside of myself ‘doings’ but this is a quarter of how I used to live. I used to love the thrill, adrenalin and excitement of an action packed suspenseful movie, football game, or getting wrapped up in an emotionally charged TV show or book where I could fantasize the rest of the day away. I used these things to not look at the reality of the life I was living and the people in it… and how much I reacted to it all. The best medicine has been feeling what is there, being honest with it and seeing what is mine and what is not, to the best I can.

  55. “All my pleasures in life and distractions kept the door closed to my inner heart” and living in this way always keeps us going around and around in circles looking outside ourselves for that which we know is the real truth deep within our bodies. With honesty and our commitment to truth we can let go of these and embrace the truth of who we are.

  56. It is such a strong consciousness about entitlement for pleasures in life -we work so hard, we deserve the pleasures. Man in the gym I go to: “…well after all the reason we work out so hard is so we can party hard”. It shocked me how accepted this is. Really? get fit to trash yourself? This may seem a long way from those ‘little pleasures’ but it may also be a slippery slope, where if life is not enough, then we do not look at why and instead feel entitled to seek a little more pleasure and then when things are really horrible, then even more and a then lot more.

  57. Being myself has been a breath of fresh air. After a decade of personal development I have come to know I don’t need to be better in any way, but I do need to be more of myself equally with everyone. It is nothing alike, for with the latter I know I am already worthy.

  58. Society has decided that some things are good for us, like yoga books and I am not saying that they aren’t but the first person I have seen boldly question what the quality of the yoga or books are first before deciding anything is Serge Benhayon. He brought up interesting philosophical questions like – if everything is energy, like Einstein famously said, then what energy are the people in that are writing the books we are reading and the yoga we are prescribing to? Rather than blindly prescribing ‘healthy’ things in my life, I was asked if I had ever stopped to feel which ones were truly beneficial. I had yoga teachers that were taking elitist drugs on the weekend and were obsessed in images, whose bodies were hard but my old approach was to say but they teach yoga, and yoga is healthy, right? What I know now, is when we prescribe to something, we don’t get to pick and choose the parts we like, we get the whole thing. So now, I look for a livingness in all I prescribe to, to know that I get the whole thing, not just the bits I like.

  59. Its a fascinating selection of goodies when you list them like that – some obviously to support exhaustion but others are in the ‘self improvement’ pile. And yet they are in the same list. Its a very useful exercise to do it like this… there are the obvious patterns of behaviour that are propping us up, but by adding them all together it reveals that there are not so obvious things that are really doing the same thing.

  60. There is nothing that tastes better than a deep connection to myself. For many the distractions of life have become the pleasures. The other day a woman said to me, ” if I had to give up sugar, I may as well be dead. Life would not be worth living.”
    There was a time where I thought this too. I thought life would lose its joy if I didn’t eat sweet things, but the opposite was true. When I don’t have sugar I am lighter and more joyful, I am not racy and far ahead of myself, so not really with me, I am more present in my life, so life is indeed worth living without sugar. Life is worth living with all of me.

  61. “everything I needed was inside me. This had a profound effect on me” I agree Jacqueline, when I heard this it stopped me in my tracks and it has taken me a while to fully connect to my inner-heart and appreciate that it is the absolute truth. No more doing, distracting or searching, just being all that I already am.

  62. I remember when I realised what I termed as ‘being happy’ was actually the complete opposite – a self-feeding entrapment into numbness. I knew it was a ‘hell’ I created and kept creating because if I thought I was ‘happy’ – why would I want to get out of it? But it was not until I encountered The Way of The Livingness and embraced what it offered some years later that I got to feel any real sense of what then was the true Way to live a life.

  63. This is a great blog Jacqueline.
    Simply being me was something that I never really considered to be possible, as it seemed to me that every where I turned the world was forcing me to adjust to fit it. Oh what clarity when I learned that I had the choice as to wether I joined the world as it is, or to stop, remember who I am and make the many choices already made along with many more to come to be me in the world, without adjusting to fit any one or any thing.

  64. To make true changes to our way of living does take some time and loving discipline and patience with oneself are a great companion in this as well as letting go of perfection. If we step by step walk in what feels true to us each step will bring us more clarity in what is truly good for us and the key is to register that and not dismiss it as something small but to build from there. Like everything in life the ‘good’ things are build one brick at a time with precision and dedication.

  65. Something that stops me from doing the gentle breath meditation is that I think I’ll do it wrong or it won’t be as effective as last time. I’m putting conditions on the practice, which is reducing my ability to just be and connect (which is the point!). I’m finding now that even having the intention to take a stop moment and feel my breath is enough, I don’t need to perform or fix something, just being me is enough and my breath is very good at communicating that fact.

  66. It’s amazing to feel how much we can change if we open ourselves to the possibility that we are absolutely enough without having to do anything.

  67. Jacqueline those lists of ‘pleasures’ read very similar to my own. It’s curious that we find something pleasurable that has a harming effect on our body. I know I was only interested in the instant gratification that they provided and didn’t really feel into how my body felt afterwards or the long term ramifications that these continued choices had on my body. I have made some new choices now, and this will continue over time as I continue to feel the consequence of my choices, but with this comes a huge appreciation for the teachings presented by Serge Benhayon, with without these I would have never realised that our body tells us everything we need to know.

  68. Jacqueline you wrote: “I realised that yoga was providing me with temporary relief from how constantly tired my body actually was, but not actually changing anything.” That is exactly my own experience as well and I was a bit shocked that I did not feel this obvious fact before.

  69. Well said Jacqueline, – ‘Being and Connecting to my true self And Feeling Myself From the Inside out Is The Greatest True Pleasure in Life.’

  70. A great blog Jacqueline and many of your comforts and distractions I too indulged in for a long time, interestingly these all took me further away from who I truly was – it is empowering when we learn to let go of these comforts and enjoy reconnecting back to our true selves.

  71. we search for pleasures and comforts because we feel unsatisfied with our life. More time spent engaging and appreciating with what life has to offer, no matter our current situation than it would be impossible to not to make light of what is going on for us.

  72. Yes I agree, letting go of what is not our truthful way and reconnecting to who we are will lead us back to well being. Evident in all areas of our lives. Physical emotional and spiritual. With a stillness, clarity and vitality to our functionality.

  73. Life has been set up in a way for us all to subscribe to images of the way life has to be, these distractions are harmful to our bodies and letting go of them is the first step in us claiming back our true nature as the sons of God.

  74. Being caught in the constant ‘doing’ of life leaves us exhausted and in need of multiple distractions, using the Gentle Breath meditation to re-connect to our inner hearts allows us to feel the true joy of being connected our inner selves and the distractions we thought were so necessary fall away as we re-discover the pleasure of being our true selves.

  75. It is interesting how a lot of the things that we call pleasures in life are actually harmful for the body and not so pleasurable in the long run.

  76. What you describe is living science to me. You get inspired and you explore the effects your daily choices have on you by eliminating, adjusting and experimenting what is supportive of your daily living and well-being or not.

  77. There is nothing like waking rested and feeling the true joy of being connected to myself. Being able to take on the day in the space I have created by not being rushed or panicked is lovely.

  78. When we are preoccupied with constantly rewarding ourselves with the external pleasures of life this actively prevents us from finding the true love and joy that lies equally within us all.

    1. So true Suse, the amount of energy and time I have wasted over the years with rewards and pleasures, if only I put the same effort into connecting to my own qualities I would have discovered the richness and rewards I have within.

  79. My distractions have been food and also keeping busy in the doing (sometimes both at the same time!) and it’s something I am continually working on. Awareness of my body through the Gentle Breath Meditation is definitely supportive in refining this process.

    1. Food is a big distraction of mine too, and I am just feeling how much I still use food to numb from feeling as soon as I sense there is something deep for me to feel. This awareness is asking/inviting me to reassess my food and also the way in which I eat – sometimes still a little too quickly if I am honest!

  80. “All my pleasures in life and distractions kept the door closed to my inner heart”

    This is so true Jacqueline and something i know and can feel in my body. I am learning to live more in my awareness so as to avoid seeking the distractions which take me away from me.

  81. Such familiar scenarios – addictive food habits, unsupportive sleep patterns, tv binge-viewing – and all ensuring we’re in a pretty constant state of anything but connected to our bodies, to our best source of knowing what’s good and true for us. I’m finding that the key to reinstating that deep connection with my body is to learn a new level of respect for the body and ‘honour it with a new awareness that all my choices affect my body in some way or another.’ From that new awareness, different choices are possible and new scenarios that support a deeper connection with the body are open to me.

    1. I am finding that too Cathy, that the more I honour my body, my awareness grows, which allows me, supports me to refine my choices, so yes this awareness brings more choices.

  82. Jacqueline, this is an excellent summation of changes many Universal medicine students have made from how we are simply connecting more to our bodies and honouring the feeling within us from day to day. It is not rocket science and it is not devotional to anything but ourselves and clearly understanding what life is about but it is powerful.

  83. What I have found is these pleasures, as much as I don’t want to admit it, make me that bit racey and so make it difficult to connect to the stillness within myself. I can mask this by looking calm, but if I am really truthful, I am not truly myself when I use stimulating things like sugar or tv programs that hook me in. Anything that takes me away from feeling who I am is something to be seriously considered.

  84. Far too many of us have spent far too much time going round and round in circles in the illusion that we are actually getting somewhere when we are in fact caught up in a vicious circle of so called pleasures that only serves to distract us from truly connecting to our inner hearts and therefore our true power Great blog Jacqueline.

    1. I agree and we continue to go round in circles until we are met with realising that there is a different way of life. I am very grateful to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine for showing me that there is a different more loving and fulfilling way to live.

  85. The sweetness of feeling who we are without all the things we use to numb ourselves can be challenging because we realise how amazing we are and with that comes the responsibility of living that all the time. It is just a way to be, a way to be truthfully ourselves, yet it’s been a long time since we lived that way. Instead of holding back, it is beautiful to gently appreciate how delicate we are and what a gift this is to ourselves and the world.

  86. It is great what you present here there is no doing needed to feel fullfilled, as the fullness is already within.

    1. Yes it is Benkt, and nominating and removing the distrctions that get in the way from feeling our fullness

  87. Anna, I was just appreciating how simple my life is now and how yummy that feels – having let go of so many distractions and letting go of things I was hanging onto internally and externally…. I just did a big clear out in my house, which feels amazing as I have created so much more space in my house and in myself – that is more space to express all of me!

  88. Having spent many years distracting myself as well Jacqueline with various pursuits and always feeling continually empty I have now enjoyed simplifying my life and letting go of the many distractions I used to indulge in. Thank goodness for Universal Medicine presenting there is a different way to live and teaching basic self love and self care principles that truly change your life in amazing ways.

  89. Reading this blog reminded me of how I would take on a new project to learn and improve myself every new year, always in the pursuit to better myself. Now I know it was only another way to distract myself from not feeling the emptiness inside.
    It wasn’t until I started to attend Universal Medicine courses and do the gentle breath meditation that my life started to change and I could build a relationship with my body.

    1. Same here Julie, when I began to care and truly nourish my body, I too began to build a relationship with my body, that had been non-existent before. This relationship continues to deepen as I listen to the intelligence that my body communicates with me.

    2. Yes, instead of bettering ourselves we can be more connected with ourselves and our inner heart – that is a nice way to ‘improve’ ourselves even though our inner heart is always there but it is worth feeling the connection more frequently and to live from that space.

  90. If anything happened that I didn’t like the feel of I would reach for comforts, if anything I did deserved recognition in my eyes, I reached for rewards, even reward for being tired, the rest of the time I found many things to dull the harshness of life. I only saw the full extent of my avoidance of life when I began to listen to the talks given by Serge Benhayon, and it took me ages to see what comforts I used and how I used things to avoid feeling what was going on. The world can be harsh and we don’t stop being hit by things because we can’t feel them. It’s better to face the world head on, keen to live and be apart of it all. These days I feel so much more joyful. The world hasn’t changed but I was not only numbing the bad stuff, I couldn’t feel any of it. Now I can and there is by far more joy to feel right within myself.

  91. When we are honest about our comforts in life, we can more easily see them for what they are – comforts. For a long time I felt I was ‘rewarding’ myself – when in fact it was pure harm. My rewards were very far from what was truly loving and supportive to the body. So it is so powerful to be able to see comforts for what they are and make a choice that is more loving.

  92. What you have so beautifully shared here Jacqueline is so very inspiring. I too spent a lot of my life in the doing and searching for more, more, more. But now see that this was purely a distraction from the glory that already resided within me. Thank you for sharing.

    1. So true Kelly. Looking and searching outside ourselves for the wisdom and glory that already resides within will always leave us feeling empty.

  93. There is, as described in this blog, clearly two ways of living. One that is in disregard of our human physical frames and this way is very good at silencing the being inside as well, or there is a way to live that cares for both in unison. What is important is that there is no prescribed set way that everyone must follow, and each person can find their rhythm according to their life, as students of life we are all learning how to love again and this is important to remember.

    1. However, what is very necessary is to learn to listen to our body. What our body says may be different for our body, but the listening we all need to do.

  94. Beautiful sharing Jacqueline. Making the choice to stop ‘doing’. So agree distractions only give temporary relief – nothing changes at all, just more numbing out to not feel the truth of what amazingness resides within. Your journey is such an inspiring one thank you.

  95. What is inside the body already just doesn’t compare with anything we can do on the outside and yet repeatedly I find myself pushing to do constantly. But then the same occurred with eating gluten, I couldn’t see a life outside of it – take away gluten and you might as well be eating nothing. All these outside things are designed to make us believe that we are nothing without them but thats not true. Like you shared Jacqueline the more we connect to what we already have the less we hold onto the things around us as if they are the all when in fact we have the all already. Thank you.

    1. So true Leigh. Most of us hang onto things tightly, ie ways of doing things or ideals and beliefs because they are so familiar and deeply ingrained, without realising they keep us stuck and in our comfort. Connecting deeply to our bodies and the wisdom within, these old ways of ‘doing’ start to fall away because they are no longer hold ‘true’.

    2. Beautiful Leigh. I agree. There is nothing compared with what is already in the body but our body reflects our choices and when we embrace our love, we feel love in our body. Likewise when we do not choose love we lack that love in our body. There is not justification to seek outside of us if the love is just a choice.

      1. How can we justify behaviours that are loveless and seeking outside of ourselves for a love that is already within us and requires no searching? We can’t, the searching only delays the fact that we created the lovelessness by leaving our love in the first place.

      2. And that shows that we do all know what the answers that we seek are. There is no excuse at the end of the day for creating an endless search to finding out something we already know the answer to.

      3. What I am also finding with this is that the fact that we know because we walked those steps that led us to any uncomfortable situation we end up in can be used to self-bash or self-empower. As Jacqueline has shared it’s not a quick-fix process to let go of the bashing because it holds off the moment of saying ‘I do know that I have a choice to not go down that road again’. Avoiding the power of our choices is one of the biggest issues in our world today.

      4. Absolutely Leigh, aversion of our power, our power through our choices is also an aversion of our responsibility.

  96. “All my pleasures in life and distractions kept the door closed to my inner heart”
    This is such a great quote, Jacqueline. I still feel challenged in this area at times as I find I can identify a comfort and stop having it but may replace it with another more “acceptable” one. What a total illusion this is! Distractions can certainly be addictive.

    1. Yes, the way out is the body. When we notice that these ‘pleasures’ make our body feel anything but pleasured – if not now, then very much so a little later, then these pleasures lose their attraction.

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