Being a black woman… what does it mean, and is there any difference to being any ‘other’ kind of woman?
Looking at my life I never thought I had an issue with being a black woman. From a young age I held the strong view that there was nothing that was a barrier for me, and nothing that I couldn’t achieve being a black woman. There was no glass ceiling for me… or so I thought!
What I have come to realise however, is that I have held a solid belief that as a black woman I had to work hard to prove myself, to be seen and accepted in the world. It’s interesting that the very thing that was propelling me forward in life was actually a belief that has been harming me the most.
You see, whilst all can look good on the surface and one can be seen to be doing well, holding such a belief leaves a very hurt and frightened person inside, where…
- I stopped opening up to people
- Work became my world and my focus
- I developed an arrogance that I knew it all and didn’t want to be seen as vulnerable or lacking in any way, especially with other women of a different race
- I was always on guard for being exposed as imperfect.
One thing I have known from a very young age is that we are all the same, and even amongst this belief and effort of trying hard, there has always been a part of me inside wanting to understand life and people at a much deeper level.
Since having sessions with Universal Medicine practitioners and speaking with Serge Benhayon, what I am beginning to feel in my heart is that inside we are all the same, regardless of the colour of the skin on the outside.
It is one thing to know this is true, but to feel and accept it is another thing and is much more poignant.
There are times when I feel the love of God in my heart so strong and the connection to all of mankind, but this has only come about through the loving support of the Esoteric Healing Practitioners not treating me any differently because of the colour of my skin, but seeing me as an equal. Somehow with that acceptance, over time I am starting to open up and let go; to see this belief of needing to work and try hard as one of the biggest ills in my life.
It keeps me away from people and from love: life becomes a lonely and very heady and mind-calculated place where my body becomes hard and defensive as if ready to do battle, and in this way I become unapproachable to others as I struggle to interact under a veneer of ‘niceness’. People don’t get to know who I am and I don’t get to know who I am either… it’s all about ‘being nice’, trying and working hard.
However, through the Esoteric Healing modalities I am coming to know myself again as a woman, beyond being a black woman, and feeling the love, sensitivity and deep understanding that comes from this true connection of being a woman which is the same in ALL women regardless of whether they are a black woman or not.
By Shevon Simon, Housing and Support Advisor for Young Homeless People, London, UK