Being a Black Woman

Shevon Simon | Being A Black Woman
Shevon Simon “I am coming to know myself again as a woman, beyond being a black woman…”

Being a black woman… what does it mean, and is there any difference to being any ‘other’ kind of woman?

Looking at my life I never thought I had an issue with being a black woman. From a young age I held the strong view that there was nothing that was a barrier for me, and nothing that I couldn’t achieve being a black woman. There was no glass ceiling for me… or so I thought!

What I have come to realise however, is that I have held a solid belief that as a black woman I had to work hard to prove myself, to be seen and accepted in the world. It’s interesting that the very thing that was propelling me forward in life was actually a belief that has been harming me the most.

You see, whilst all can look good on the surface and one can be seen to be doing well, holding such a belief leaves a very hurt and frightened person inside, where…

  • I stopped opening up to people
  • Work became my world and my focus
  • I developed an arrogance that I knew it all and didn’t want to be seen as vulnerable or lacking in any way, especially with other women of a different race
  • I was always on guard for being exposed as imperfect.

One thing I have known from a very young age is that we are all the same, and even amongst this belief and effort of trying hard, there has always been a part of me inside wanting to understand life and people at a much deeper level.

Since having sessions with Universal Medicine practitioners and speaking with Serge Benhayon, what I am beginning to feel in my heart is that inside we are all the same, regardless of the colour of the skin on the outside.

It is one thing to know this is true, but to feel and accept it is another thing and is much more poignant.

There are times when I feel the love of God in my heart so strong and the connection to all of mankind, but this has only come about through the loving support of the Esoteric Healing Practitioners not treating me any differently because of the colour of my skin, but seeing me as an equal. Somehow with that acceptance, over time I am starting to open up and let go; to see this belief of needing to work and try hard as one of the biggest ills in my life.

It keeps me away from people and from love: life becomes a lonely and very heady and mind-calculated place where my body becomes hard and defensive as if ready to do battle, and in this way I become unapproachable to others as I struggle to interact under a veneer of ‘niceness’. People don’t get to know who I am and I don’t get to know who I am either… it’s all about ‘being nice’, trying and working hard.

However, through the Esoteric Healing modalities I am coming to know myself again as a woman, beyond being a black woman, and feeling the love, sensitivity and deep understanding that comes from this true connection of being a woman which is the same in ALL women regardless of whether they are a black woman or not.

Inspired by the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

By Shevon Simon, Housing and Support Advisor for Young Homeless People, London, UK

Further Reading:
Esoteric Breast Massage: Embracing Tenderness and Deepening My Understanding of Abuse

514 thoughts on “Being a Black Woman

  1. Love it Shevon – colour matters not for we are all women and on the inside we are all of the same… “However, through the Esoteric Healing modalities I am coming to know myself again as a woman, beyond being a black woman, and feeling the love, sensitivity and deep understanding that comes from this true connection of being a woman which is the same in ALL women regardless of whether they are a black woman or not.”

  2. When we shut down and comply to striving to be something or someone else, one of the trade offs is that we shut ourselves down and then focus on an achievement base rather than a connection base and so we ‘lose ourselves’ and harden in the process. It is not that this cannot be undone, but that it does disconnect us from ourselves and others significantly and has its consequences. This is a great reminder for me to simply just be me, not ask to be anything other than who I am and having a deep deep appreciation for this as well.

  3. Shevon, I love what you have shared here – and I can say that regardless of skin colour, if in some way we feel we do not measure up to the world’s expectations then we poison ourselves if we take this on board and constantly strive to prove that we are ‘worth it’…

  4. Many years ago I worked for a company that had its headquarters in the deep South of America and in our team in the UK we had a lovely young lady of African origin. This young lady went out with a few of us to the Head office and it was there amongst other black colleagues from the office that we discovered discrimination against her! We never really got to understand why people of the same race would want to discriminate against each other but it happened and the young lady never went out to the head office again. She refused to go and everyone understood why. It was a very strange incident because if we stop and think about this we all have legs, arms and feet, a head we all bleed blood, we laugh, we cry, we are all the same, so why do we put barriers up when really there are no barriers at all?

  5. Accepting ourselves and others for who they are helps support us all in our evolving back to who we truly are, ‘over time I am starting to open up and let go; to see this belief of needing to work and try hard as one of the biggest ills in my life.’

  6. Those feelings of inadequacy and needing to try or prove ourselves can come for many reasons. I could relate to what you shared Shevon, and also to the beauty of equality that develops from reconnecting to our inner heart and understanding that we are each as an essence the same, no matter what size, shape or colour the body is we come in.

    1. Yes, I agree, the feelings you and Shevon describe are present in many people, and drive them to continually prove themselves, ‘I had to work hard to prove myself, to be seen and accepted in the world. It’s interesting that the very thing that was propelling me forward in life was actually a belief that has been harming me the most.’

    2. So well said Melinda, and I too as a woman can relate to the feelings of inadequacy from the societal expectations, regardless of shape, size and colour. It is a journey of self empowerment to drop these feelings and deeply appreciate the all that we bring.

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