Recently it dawned on me how most of my life has been governed by an outer influence – always there was something or somebody who told me what to do or how to be. The interesting part in all of this is that I thought I chose what I do. In truth, there is so much information out there that tells us how to live, how to eat, what to do to live a happy life, what to do to become richer and how to behave to gain power, etc. Relying on all this information to help me through life, never once did it occur to me that I had all the information I ever needed, if only I had listened to my inner knowing.
By searching for the answers outside of this inner knowing, I opened myself up to being influenced by others’ decisions and gave my power away to what others thought was best for me. Yet all along I had a feeling of my truth but chose to override it constantly. I chose to override what felt true for me.
I did not once stop and ask my body what would be a loving and supportive choice for it.
Although there was a deep knowing in me of what is true, I was not able to follow it. It seemed to be so opposite to what was taught in school, lived in religious groups or in society in general, that I felt scared to acknowledge this deep inner knowing and wisdom.
In school, sometimes even in kindergarten, teachers are telling us what to do in order to get good marks, no matter how our body feels about this. The church tells us what to do to be a better person and have God’s blessing, instead of feeling deep in our bodies what is true. The boss tells us what to do in our workplace and often we cope in order not to get in trouble. The bank tells us how to be with our money and what we have earned, and finally there are loads of books or the Internet where we can look up what to do in certain situations.
I realised that I was reacting to the demands of what society and life brought towards me and I tried to find the right solution to deal with that in reading lots of books to gain as much knowledge as possible for any situation.
The choice to look outside created an enormous tension in me between my inner knowing and my habit of giving my power away to the outside world.
Constantly disregarding myself caused frustration, disharmony and anxiousness in my body, but I was not willing to listen to the knowing inside of me and take responsibility for myself.
My life changed when I came to know Serge Benhayon 4 years ago. For the first time in my life someone understood what I was feeling and knowing and I was able to develop an understanding for myself. Still, the habit to give my power away instead of truly listening to myself was so ingrained that it felt hard to change in the beginning.
However, since I have been attending Universal Medicine courses, I have developed more and more love and patience concerning the way I am living. This has improved my life by changing my habits into ‘better habits,’ – however, to allow myself to listen to the truth inside of me took time.
In gaining more understanding of what Serge Benhayon presents:
- I am learning to not obey blindly
- I am starting to question what is going on, around and inside me
- I am acknowledging that what is inside of me, my inner wisdom, is so enormously precious and deserves deep attention
- I am expressing my truth and what I am feeling
I understand that my inner knowing and wisdom is a deeply loving place which needs to be listened to. In expressing what I am feeling there comes joy and vitality in my body. It is a way of living which sometimes seems to be difficult or hard because I am so used to my old patterns of searching outside for answers, but…
In truth our inner knowing is always inside us: it is simple and leads us to a life of simplicity and unity.
In deeply acknowledging this love that I am, making that simple choice to reconnect to my heart, to my inner knowing, to the essence inside and to express myself from this place, takes the confusion out of knowing what to do in every moment and brings forth the power of love that I am.
By Kerstin Salzer, Physiotherapist, Germany
The Way It Is – A Treatise on Energetic Truth