Anxiety: Why are you Ruling my Life?

I had an anxiety problem. Well, this is what I used to tell myself anyhow. In fact, I didn’t have an anxiety problem at all. I may have all the symptoms of anxiety – a raciness within my body – and yes, it can get to the place where it is a problem, but to say I have an anxiety problem does not quite go to the heart of the matter.

Let me explain.

I remember anxiety affecting me at age 4 as I waited for the school bus and it has been with me ever since. I remember sitting in class at school not being able to answer any questions because I felt anxious and fearful, so I learned to sit and listen and be very, very quiet. I had determined very early on that this was the best way not to get attention and to stay out of trouble. I may have been quiet, but I observed everything around me with an absolute astuteness.

Now let’s fast forward to my 40s. Anxiety had now become a major hindrance to my life. In fact, it was ruling my life, making it difficult to get through each day and preventing me from connecting more deeply with other people and having the relationships that I knew were possible. It was worse now than ever before because I had stopped living in a way that was hard and in protection. What this meant though was that I was more open to feeling everything around me, where people were at and where I was at, and this made me feel uncomfortable, like I could not cope.

Addressing anxiety could potentially change my life, and I was ready for it; prepared to explore what it was all about.

This was all triggered by a situation where I was verbally abused by someone for something very petty. I was shaken to the point where I went straight to my ‘give up’ place saying “this is all too hard.” Over the years I just couldn’t get the anxiety to stop, and this situation was the last straw, so I went for a quick fix and decided to give anxiety medication a go. There was a part of me that felt such relief with the medication because my body was more relaxed and my mind less agitated. In many ways I could say that I felt a little numb. Nevertheless, I knew that whilst the tablets were providing me with a level of desensitisation or relief from the world, it was not a resolution going to the root issue.

I did not rely on the medication alone, but continued with my commitment to understand and heal from the anxiety. I felt well supported by a team of wonderful practitioners that included my doctor, a psychologist and an Esoteric Chakra Puncture practitioner, and here I began the unfolding journey around healing this anxiety.

I stayed on the medication for six months while I worked on my ‘inner’ world. The medication was not a complete fix to the problem. It didn’t stop my reactions or the hurt in my body when I was abused by another or when I felt something hurtful. It didn’t stop the upset, and still I could push through and become racy if I wanted to avoid feeling.

When I was ready to come off the tablets that is what I did, even though I remember feeling apprehensive about whether or not I would be able to cope with life again. So I took it very slowly, supported by my doctor, feeling no rush to this process. By the time I was down to no medicine at all I was prepared as I ever would be to take the next step. It is a phase where many people typically return to the medication – in even higher doses – and the comments on the Internet sites were not very positive at all. With this in mind, over the next two weeks I allowed my body to go through the withdrawal phase from the medication and this felt quite uncomfortable, but further Chakra Puncture sessions and a commitment to being gentle on myself allowed the symptoms to pass very quickly.

To no surprise, I was met with all the same feelings and reactions that I had from before I started the medication, but now I felt more secure in myself to deal with whatever else was there to learn. Similar situations of conflict presented again, just like before, but this time I was able to handle what was before me. Something had shifted.

I discovered three things.

1. Anxiety as a Choice

One day when I was laying on the healing table in a Chakra Puncture session I became aware that I was free of the symptoms of anxiety. At the end of the session I would speak very differently to the practitioner, in a way that was more present and connected, no longer racy or agitated. When I left the clinic I felt steady and with no symptoms of anxiety at all! This was not my first Chakra Puncture treatment by any means, but the first one when I noticed that anxiety was not present.

This was quite amazing. It was like the session had showed me my future: a ‘me’ in the future that was sharper, more steady inside and knowing. For a while after the session I could live life from this ‘new me’ place, but soon it would dissipate and the anxiousness would return. But I now knew that in the stillness there was great awareness and knowing, and not an ounce of anxiety.

If there was no anxiety to be felt when I was on the healing table, then I had to be open to the fact that I might be choosing it. But why would I choose anxiety? Who in their right mind would choose anxiety?!?

Well, the symptoms of anxiety were begging me to connect to my body, like a child crying out for support, but instead I would unconsciously create a distraction to run away from the uncomfortable symptoms. Instead of connecting to my body and stepping out into the world with confidence, shining the true me, I would choose to become my fearful, unseen, small and contracted self – just like when I was 4 years old – because this is what I had relied on to get through life thus far. Asking me to be more than this, to be seen and self-assured, was certainly tempting and even achievable, but it brought with it great fear and trepidation.

There were a lot of things that I blamed for my anxiety. For instance, I thought I had a problem with trusting people, but I did not; I thought I had a problem handling life, but I did not; for a while I blamed it on childhood issues, but it wasn’t that at all; I thought it wasn’t ‘natural’ for someone like me to do public speaking, but really it was; I thought there was something really wrong with me, but there wasn’t. I was simply resisting connecting to the stillness and being my true self.

Why resist connecting to the stillness when it feels so amazing? This is answered simply. There is a power, an authority and a knowingness about life that is unshakable when we live from the stillness. I could have chosen this and been more responsible, but I had convinced myself that the disharmony in my life and around me in the world was bigger and more powerful than me and that I was too weak to hold steady. I realise now that I had to work very hard, even to the point of exhaustion, so that I didn’t have to feel what was being asked of me. Instead I would create a momentum of busy-ness that allowed me to enjoin with the buzzy energy around me: I could get caught up in the chaos that would dull my awareness and I could live in a way where I was burdened and could quite rightly say, “See, how can I step up in this kind of world?”

There are probably hundreds of tricks that I would find to distract myself away from the simple act of connecting with the stillness within. In many ways it could be said that I was so busy trying to address the chaos that all along, all that was needed was to connect deeply with the body and enjoy the simplicity that is there. If the world around me was crazy, then I just needed to let it be crazy. Nothing to be done, except to read it as it really is.

2. Discovering the Picture

I also needed to disarm myself of a picture that I had created of how I felt life here on Earth should be between people, and also my investment in making it ‘right’ or ‘better.’ Deep down I knew relationships to naturally be affectionate, deeply caring and where there was understanding for each other, but I struggled to accept all that was not loving between people. By not accepting what was not loving in the world, it meant that I set myself up to react to it when it presented. And it presented a lot!

Coming to an understanding and acceptance that life here on this planet is as it is – with its love and its lovelessness – still hurts from time to time, but the lack of love we experience here is part of life. Sure the lovelessness is not a true way to live, but it is the reality and to me it really does appear to be what planet Earth is all about. Abuse and violence at all levels has been here for thousands of years. It is not something new that has crept in… it has been here from day one.

I am still coming to terms with this aspect in full, and at times continue to find myself foolishly desiring it to be another way, but one thing I do know for sure – the tension in our bodies that we feel when we encounter something that is not loving is quite natural for us to feel as human beings. Our bodies amazingly read what is love and what is not and will clearly let us know what is before us at any given time. How we react to the hurt… well, that is another story altogether.

3. Something to Express

The next aspect for me to understand unveiled itself at a Universal Medicine workshop. What I understood from Serge Benhayon’s presentation is that anxiety is just the body’s natural way of telling us that we have something amazing or important to express. This struck a chord with me – like a lightbulb turning on. I had believed anxiety to be something wrong with me, like an illness, but with this statement I could feel that anxiety was a natural part of me – like a messenger.

Anxiety encourages us to express, and if we ignore those impulses it will become louder.

I didn’t have to wait long for a situation to present and show me this was true. Only hours later, and at this same event, Serge asked the audience to share about an activity that we had done. I have never been able to talk on the microphone at these sessions, or with any large audience in fact, but this time I had something specific to share. I felt the impulse to put my hand up and take the microphone. I wanted to do it but I physically could not raise my arm. I sat in the chair and observed my anxiety kick in and the longer I resisted expressing myself, holding myself back, the more intense the anxiety became until it reached a point that the anxiety had caused such a physical reaction that I was beside myself and could no longer speak. The moment was gone and I held back saying what I had to say.

After this situation I began to practise speaking up in everyday situations. It was harder with those things that I feared could potentially end in conflict, but as long as I stayed connected to myself as I spoke, the words were there and were more often than not received with their loving intention.

Practising this helped prepare me to speak at an Engineering Conference, to a large audience of over 210 people. In many ways I found it easier to talk at the conference than to express about those sensitive matters or things that made me vulnerable, and this was a surprise. On the evening of the Conference Dinner I felt the anxiety in my body begin to run about 2 hours before the event, but I did not allow myself to run with any silly story, I just told myself “You have something amazing to say. You may not know what that is just yet, but get up there, let go and enjoy being yourself.” And that is what I did. Within minutes the audience was laughing and I relaxed to the point where there was no anxiety at all. None. And it was fun!

Today I look at anxiety very differently to how I have in the past. It is no longer about ridding myself of the symptoms of anxiety or running away from what I may feel, but responding to it when I first notice its presence in my body so that it does not reach the heights that I have allowed it to go in the past. All along I believed there was something wrong with me as it has been so debilitating in my life, and here now I have been given the freedom to know that anxiety does not need to rule my life. It is more like a friend that pops in from time to time to remind me to express what is there and to let go and be myself without fear of repercussion. Anxiety may be there as my personal little champion to help me be all of me whenever I am taking another step, and that is something I can now deeply appreciate.

By Maree Savins, Australia

Related Reading:
Anxious Much?
Anxiety is not Something you Just Have to Put Up With – There is Another Way
Nervousness and Anxiety – A Scared Little Boy

583 thoughts on “Anxiety: Why are you Ruling my Life?

  1. Anxiety, and the nervous tension that comes with it, is the cause of so much exhaustion in the world today – the constant angst creates a tension that takes energy to hold it that way… and so we end up exhausted at the end of our day, falling into bed with relief at not having to hold the anxiety anymore – at least for 8hrs anyway!

  2. I’ve lived with anxiousness all my life, like an ever-present undercurrent… but if you’d asked me 10 yrs ago, before attending Universal Medicine presentations and workshops, I would have said “I’m fine” – it was ‘normal’ to live on nervous energy, be hard and racy – especially racy conversations. I still go into that way of being sometimes, but when I do, it stands out – its become not normal anymore, and I can feel how much it hurts my body and have to stop.

  3. “it was ruling my life, making it difficult to get through each day and preventing me from connecting more deeply with other people and having the relationships that I knew were possible” – feelings like these are so common, and aside from anxiety there are many different situations where this same burden falls heavily on our shoulders of not feeling able to be completely content, loving and attentive to relationships. What’s important is to see where we set ourselves up to feel trapped like this, e.g. when we focus on small problems or minute details of wrongdoings, reactions etc.

    1. I am a woman of “mature years”, and have only just discovered that the low-level anxiety I have been living with since being a small child. The burden you mention here, SusieW, I have carried all this time and it has interfered with my relationships, and continues to today. Reading this wonderful blog, and your comment, is giving me a clear direction to start understand and accept how this has been part of me, but that it doesn’t need to be. Starting today, I will be following these three steps more than I have been up to now, and I will not allow any negative self-talk, which has been one of the ways I set myself up to fail. Thank you all for sound advice.

  4. Thank you, Maree, the three points you are presenting here from your learning about anxiety are priceless.

  5. Without holding a picture of what might happen anxiety cannot be. By being present with ourselves, our body and sense of who we are we go step by step without holding a picture for where these steps may lead to but with the confidence that the quality of being me taken to the next moment will guarantee that I am me when I arrive there.

    1. What you shared about the link between anxiety and holding pictures of the future is so true Alex. I have recently been focusing more and more on living moment by moment, simply focusing on my body as it moves and what I have noticed is just how much the expectations of what may be (the pictures, as you mentioned) push me in all kinds of directions that are many times not in line with what my body even wants or needs after all. It’s like going on a wild goose chase when we let these images rule our behaviour. But when I just stay with feeling my body, it’s as if everything happens naturally and in a flow without so much effort.

  6. I really love how you have turned anxiety on its head. A reminder that we have something to express, that it is important to express it otherwise it sits in our bodies making us feel very uncomfortable.

  7. Maree, I am amazed by the level of awareness you have of your own situation and how detailed you are able to observe what is playing out and in that, how your own choices affects the whole. Your blog offers super important lived experience.

  8. This is beautiful Maree . . . .”Anxiety may be there as my personal little champion to help me be all of me whenever I am taking another step, and that is something I can now deeply appreciate.” . . . I can certainly relate to this and have found that when I am anxious about taking that next step all I have to do is focus on my movements and my breath and this takes me out of my anxiety and into my body.

  9. Its a hard statement to make but I would agree with you that no one has an anxiety problem, they create it. Well at any rate this is what I discovered was true for me and I have every reason to believe that I am just like everyone else in this regard.

  10. There is a place of steadiness and stillness inside of us, only it can feel elusive or difficult to access or tune into at times. But just knowing it is there is an amazing gift in itself, and a marker that shows us what life can really be about when we bring this to the fore.

    1. I agree Henrietta and it is key to remember it is always within us no matter how far off it may feel. When we connect to this almost instantly I can feel it. Whereas when I try to get back to it it feels like a massive struggle and effort. We have it all already we just need to fully wake up to this fact. And yes it is an amazing gift we can give ourselves and everyone else in every moment!

  11. Absolutely Maree – it is amazing when one begins to nominate and speak up again in a loving and understanding way – instead of letting things sit inside and disturb you unexamined like a land-mine. I have been surprised at how many people have said thank you to me when I have spoken up recently instead of the atomic bomb I have been imagining might happen in return.

  12. I have lived with anxiousness all my life and my body is so used to this configuration that having come out of it I can snap back in, in a nanno second! But connecting to the stillness inside coupled with developing self-appreciation is the only way I have found that can support me to change this pattern.

    1. When we understand that anxiety is not who we are, we can start to heal it and let it go. So many people would benefit from reading this blog and knowing that it is entirely possible to live without a behavioural pattern that many spend years just putting up with.

  13. When we choose to give ourselves space around the tension we feel when we go into anxiousness, and reflect on what we were thinking, in my experience it is always self judgemental thoughts that precede the thought and movement. Allowing space to connect with and nominate those thoughts, clears what you have let in and is a self loving choice to make, and proves that the power of our love is stupendous.

  14. We put up with verbal abuse – we can feel it and it hurts our bodies but we don’t want to say anything for fear of the reaction back. When we can acknowledge to ourselves how it feels, that’s a first step, nominating it as abuse, that’s a second step, the third step may be further down the line as we get more confident, but it feels really good when we can say how we feel and know that it is heard as a truth and when we don’t get affected by the reaction back I guess that’s the fourth step. It feels good to express how we feel from the authority of the fact that we are feeling it.

    1. It sure does. Something I find I can go into is trying to justify or make the other person see how I am feeling which itself still has a tinge of reaction to it. I know for me the more I say no to any sort of abuse with my whole body the less another person can get me to react, and the simplest way I have found to do this is to see them as the love they are and hold them in that and thus what may be coming at me is not really them and so it takes the personal factor away and is easier to see and understand the whole picture.

  15. ‘…. I was more open to feeling everything around me, where people were at and where I was at, and this made me feel uncomfortable, like I could not cope’ – this really resonates with me, Maree. I can sometimes feel my body harden in reaction to all that I’m feeling around me, particularly any dis-harmony. I am learning to remind myself to observe my reaction without giving in to it and that it’s my responsibility, to myself and all of humanity, to live the fullness of the love that I am, to the best of my ability. To harden and go into protection isn’t serving anyone, it only adds to the ill-energy that already exists.

  16. ‘… If the world around me was crazy, then I just needed to let it be crazy. Nothing to be done, except to read it as it really is.’ – so true. Reading this I am appreciating the reminder that my dis-comfort in allowing this is showing me that I still want to control situations, to avoid feeling what is truly going on.

  17. “… Anxiety: Why are you Ruling my life?…” is a great question as when you ask yourself this, it is like putting a spanner in the wheel to pause the momentum of anxiety and see it clearly as as imposition over you – thus giving you the space to feel you without this draining energy.

  18. When we are run by anxiety and nervousness- we miss out on seeing the true picture and perhaps that things, people and situations are not designed to hurt us but in fact are there for us to learn and express ourselves.

    1. So true in each and every moment we are presented with opportunities to evolve the question is do we take them and grab them with both hands and go yes what am I being shown here and what is there for me to learn or do we take things as poor me, this is so hard etc.. It makes such a big difference and literally changes everything. It makes life about learning and evolving rather than purely trying to get through the day with as least about of struggle and fight as possible.

    2. True Harry – with anxiety, the small things magnify into proportions that seem at times unsurmountable yet nothing that comes to us and we are faced with, is every too much for us for we are all well equipped to live life and to respond accordingly when we are connected and present.

  19. ‘I learned to sit and listen and be very, very quiet.’ A learned response to our environment that is guaranteed to lock us in a cycle of contraction. Stepping away from those learned cycles is a process we need to be very loving and tender with ourselves as we do so.

  20. “But I now knew that in the stillness there was great awareness and knowing, and not an ounce of anxiety.” What a huge life changing revelation. This is what is offered to us all through the Chakra-puncture and other Universal Medicine healing modalities is an opportunity to connect to an infinite stillness within us and hence provide us with a real choice: stillness or emotion. Once experienced we are empowered to disengage from our emotions that veil us from our truth.

  21. ‘Anxiety encourages us to express, and if we ignore those impulses it will become louder.’ and when everything is expression I recognise the sheer holding back and delay that I have at time been in to create this feeling of anxiety.

  22. Thank you Maree, as someone who can remember anxious feelings since the age of three, I find your article immensely helpful. I can feel how labelling myself as an anxious person has kept me in that state of a continual round of being very anxious and trying to quell it instead of truly exploring what it is and knowing it is an outside energy that I have chosen to identify with. When you talk about connecting with the body I know this to be true, for I also know as a child in order to avoid the pain and anxiousness around situations I would disappear into my head and try to control everything. Of course then the body sends us all these symptoms of panic trying to connect with us! Panic is really a safety valve so we don’t go totally crazy. That we have something important to express is such a positive affirming way of perceiving this whole issue, showing it is really no issue at all, just something we create.

  23. When we allow anxiety to engulf us we often miss out on what is being presented to us in those situation and event in our lives that we feel uneasy about, so it is important to befriend this condition and seek understanding on why we are holding back our true expression.

  24. It’s true that running away from anxiety doesn’t work…it only creates more anxiety! Responding to it, however when it is first felt and bringing awareness to the body is a great support.

  25. I think it’s brilliant how you committed to really observing and understanding on a deeper level what was going on behind the anxiety whilst practically supporting yourself with medication from your GP – so that the medication wasn’t used as just quick fix or band aid to cover up the anxiety and carry on regardless but something to help you truly heal.

  26. When we are triggered by a situation and react, the reaction comes with all the undealt with feelings and pent up emotions that we have supressed over the previous, days, months, years. So many times I have reacted or been reacted to in an illogical manner – the reaction was far bigger than the moment. Taking a moment of pause when we become aware we are being triggered gives space to respond in a different way.

    1. The illogical manner is what I can relate to here. It seems out of this world, not possible but there is never a deep understanding to what this may be and whether there is something at play that time and time again we pull out of our bag of tricks, to keep us in reaction rather than into the simple flow and trust of what is needed in every moment.

  27. I can really relate here to what you are saying about anxiety affecting relationships for I have noticed that if I am even mildly anxious or not at ease in my body, the way my voice sounds, the way my body feels and moves and even the quality of my thoughts and what I am communicating is all affected and so the level and depth of connection that is possible in any meeting or relationship with another person is all affected by the level of anxiety or ease in my body.

  28. Focusing on the fact that everything we need is within us gives a whole new perspective on any ill condition. For in that focus we build the intimate understanding of the truth of who we are and what we are doing here.

    1. Very true Ariana, and we learn to listen to the body – it has such ‘smarts’!!!! Not sure how we forgot, or were perhaps never taught, to consult the expert first. That connection, as you share, connects us to our purpose and why we are here.

  29. The awareness of our patterns, as you describe with anxiety Maree, is the way to stop them taking over our lives. When we know that the behaviour is not us, it is simply how we learned to cope and repeated those patterns. we can overcome it quite easily. Expression is the way out of anxiety, by speaking up and I have also found expression comes with physical movements to relieve anxiety as we let go of the tension that can hold in the body.

  30. This is amazing Maree. Apart from being deeply inspiring and insightful it is also what I would call a modern day miracle. The realisation that anxiety is a choice was a turning point for me to be able to start working with the anxiety instead of trying to suppress, ignore or let myself be overcome by it. I like what you say about anxiety tells us we have something to express. That’s absolutely true in my experience too.

  31. Great, comprehensive overview of anxiety and a great approach to addressing this within ourselves – given the prevalence of anxiety in society, this will support many people, thank you Maree.

  32. It’s so true that anxiety is actually a choice. Yes it may be an ingrained pattern, but we can choose to re-imprint this at any time. Connecting to the body instead of feeding all the thoughts in our mind helps us to stay present with the reality of what is going on. Interpreting this leads to anxiety.

  33. So many of us live with anxiousness, I know I did for years, an underlying vibration of chaos in my body that I used to attempt to numb and deny, but it was there no doubt. Great to appreciate that I have shifted it, and how though a commitment not to ignore, that it is there for a message, do we listen to how we feel. Do we know we do not need to be in a restless disharmonious state, this is inspiring to feel that we can choose otherwise.

  34. I don’t shake my legs, I don’t have a nervous twitch, I don’t get scared or stressed in the city – compared to other people I know I don’t seem to have an anxiety issue. But do I surrender at night? Do I let people in? Do I live in a way that truly embraces my sacredness? The answer to all these questions is a resounding ‘no’. I have started to see that I live with a residual level of anxiety that comes from feeling ‘I am not safe’. It’s been with me for so long I have accepted it as part of my ‘norm’. But as my body and your words here show Maree, it is not on.

  35. Having received chakrapuncture myself I can say that one of the best things about it is that it reconnects you to your real essence or presence so you get to feel the real you free of everything else which means you then start to view everything else as add ons and patterns and no longer just accept them as part of who you are.

  36. The body has many ways of communicating, such as anxiety being a message being about expression, beautiful to feel the potential to self heal and blossom if we listen to what the body shares.

  37. Anxiety is a common thing for many people in society but has become so normal that it isn’t recognised for what it is – from deep connection to our body and our feelings we get the knowing of who we are – and who we are is totally divine so we can handle whatever is around us – just with the acceptance and letting out of who we are in all it’s grandness – we sometimes hold on to how we perceive things will be, meanwhile missing out on seeing how they could actually be when we hold onto anxiety

  38. Anxiety can be healed by accepting all that we know on many levels and simply allowing ourselves to express.

    1. So simple and so true – ‘Anxiety can be healed by accepting all that we know on many levels and simply allowing ourselves to express’.

  39. Getting this level of support to know we are not defined by an issue is vital. Without it, the issue can live under the surface and permanently feed the notion that we are not good enough and have a reason to feel like we cannot cope with what is to come. It takes commitment and dedication to ourselves and to the greater plan and support from those who can understand the pattern of behaviour.

  40. Giving myself permission to come to a stop and simply feel and observe anxiety that can arise in my body is the greatest gift – in that pause, the body does what it does best, sorts itself out without my mind interfering with it. Observing and not being pulled into absorbing the emotion changes everything.

  41. Thank you Maree, having the confidence for public speaking is huge, and not something I have mastered at all. But I can see how important it is to stand up and to share the truth of what we have experienced from the voice of our bodes and the wisdom of our hearts.

  42. It’s wonderfully inspiring, Maree, how you gave yourself the space to heal and resourced yourself with all the support you needed to address the anxiety once and for all.

  43. I always thought I didn’t have anxiety – I never had panic attacks and was quite able to get on with life. Then a few years ago it hit me like a tonne of bricks that I lived with constant low grade anxiety. This is very easy to mask and hide yet plays out constantly through the day – worrying about if I would get a car park where I wanted it, worrying about if I would have dinner cooked on time..every part of the day was touched by anxiety.

    1. Great observations Nikki, I can totally relate to that as we just seem to go on refining what it would be like to not have this in our lives, without perfection, but certainly without the crippling effect it has had in the past.

    2. I was the same Nikki, because my anxiety levels were not obvious, I convinced myself I didn’t suffer from anxiety. When I was honest with myself about how I felt and my choices, it was only then that things started to shift mainly because I allowed myself to become more aware of it. Also because I chose not to let anxiety rule my daily life any more and realise there is a more loving way to live.

  44. Sometimes when I am anxious the best thing I can do is to not give it any air time so to speak, not letting it run wild because when I make my focus on purpose, on being with people and remaining open and loving and when I do this often the anxiety fades.

  45. Connecting to our stillness and being our true self.’ Simple, inexpensive remedy for anxiousness that works. Problem is many people prefer a drug to ‘fix’ their anxiousness as they do not want to take on the responsibility and commitment that is needed to re-connect to our true self and truly heal.

  46. When you are used to living with a difficult situation and find something that takes it away, it’s easy to see this as a momentary blip – a small pause in the face of a ongoing sentence. But what if it’s not such a small speck in fact but a crucial first footstep into the future? I love what you have presented here Maree, it inspires me to see the changes in my life as great possibilities not forever futile fallacies.

  47. Maree you have paved the way for so many with this so called affliction to kick it out of the park , I have always avoided public speaking or speaking up in a large group, but by the sounds of it anyone can overcome this anxiety and speak the truth that is inside us all

  48. How empowering it is to accept that we are well equipped to respond to life, irrespective of what we are presented with and it is simply a choice to remain with ourselves, in connection or to take ourselves off track.

  49. It is an interesting point here that the anxiety appears to get worse initially as we start to drop the protection and start to feel again. We seem to be so very sensitive at this stage and can struggle to cope with it. But as we stay feeling, and start to look at the hurts and patterns as per your 3 part observations on anxiety, that it is a choice, letting go of how we thing things should be, and expressing ourselves. I have seen a great deal of change in myself in this regard, but there are still a few relationships especially where I care more what that person thinks of me, where I can get anxious. Thank you for this insightful piece.

  50. I also came to find a big part of my anxiety was not being fully present in life – did I lock that door, did I send that email, have I forgotten something? Not being there in the moment with me left gaps for doubts and anxiety to creep in later.

  51. There is an attention and ongoing vigilance required to look behind how we feel to the root causes of our behaviour and choices. And the more we delve the more we refine the tuning of our body and what it can show and teach us.

  52. To feel the stillness of who we truly are offers us the opportunity to understand how we take on ways of living that are not true.

  53. I used to let anxiety shape my life – but no more, as now I have a completely different foundation in my body that comes from connecting and building love in every movement.

  54. How often do we find ourselves by something that triggers us to be unsettled and we choose to medicate ourselves, be it a more blatant from such as pharmaceutical drugs or a more subtle one such as food, drink or distraction? I can put my hand up for many instances in my own life. This blog is a wonderful inspiring story about the blessing available when instead of ignoring and burying our awareness of our issues, we choose to stay open, reflect on what is shown for us to learn and to heal, and use the opportunity to deepen our love, care and responsibility in our life.

    1. Indeed Golnaz, instead of ignoring the fact that we can and do feel energy, acknowledge this fact and question ourselves what is happening in this situations and what would be our response to it and honoring the fact that we actually know everything that is needed in any situation.

  55. I love how you were able to overcome your anxiety Maree enough to be able to stand up and speak to over 200 people. This is so inspiring, as I too still find putting my hand up to speak in a workshop a real challenge. But the more I say what Im feeling to say in any one moment, I agree, it does get easier and the anxiety about speaking up lessens.

  56. I too realise that anxiety is a choice. As soon as I decide to just be myself, not worry about what people think of me or of what I do, then anxiety and fear has no power over me. It dissipates and I can feel the stillness again.

  57. I love how your blog describes ‘anxiety’ as something that is not you specifically, rather it being like a package that has overcome and displaced the natural state of being. Often when anxiety has been going on for a while, it is easy for the behaviours and patterns of anxiety to assume one’s identity – which given the opportunity for a person to deeply connect within, these traits come to a complete halt.

  58. Isn’t it incredible that although we put such focus on gaining knowledge we can have such sentiments as: “For many years my reaction to my ability to know things caused me a lot of anxiety”! I have been attending um presentations where SB offers incredible revelations and insights about the human woes we are finding ourselves in, I love the depth of awareness and understanding supported.

    Yet at time I myself go through a period of refusal to see, hear or feel what is so clearly in front of my face, especially when it has the potential to rock me out of the comfortable groove I have dug out for myself in life. I know most people react when facing new things. Isn’t it crazy that it seems I can have more trust in what is familiar, even when it has only caused trouble, and run from anything ‘new and unknown’ although it could offer all that we have ever wanted.

    Wouldn’t the best form of education to support people, as does Universal Medicine, to connect to their innate awareness and confidence, and find ways to support themselves to live their full expression in a world that often encourages the opposite.

  59. What you present is the cycle of the pattern and I love how you were able to be so much more solid when you felt the anxiety come back after stopping the medication, What it highlights is that we always have a choice, and in that, we can choose to go back to the comforts of what we know or we can choose to say yes to more love.

  60. It is so true that we can be very quiet and still but on the inside we are full of nervous tension watching and anticipating where the next threat may come from. This is no way to live long term and merely a survival mechanism rather the deep settlement of living present in the moment and responding to life.

  61. It is interesting to consider that anxiety is just a messenger of the fact that we have something to express, something that is important being told or said. And like you Maree, I also know these situations that I would like to contribute to the conversation but finally choose to do not. The anxiety in my body then rises to incredible heights. I do also know situations where I do contribute, not hold back but express that what needs to be said, resulting in a warm and comfortable feeling in my body in which I feel surrendered and complete.

  62. Being present and truly allowing ourselves to accept each moment, where we are at and bring our all to it, stops anxiety in its tracks for there is no environment provided to foster such expression.

  63. It’s amazing how ‘staying out of trouble’ as a child can so deeply affect our whole life. When we make staying out of trouble our whole purpose in life (which is what I did) it means that I am always on the alert for problems rather than living life in the moment and fully being me without any manipulation or hidden agenda. Instead of living life to the full I made the whole of my life a big charade where I was constantly going against what I knew to be true rather than allowing people to see the whole of me in all my glory.

  64. An amazing sharing on anxiety and so inspirational for all those suffering from anxiousness with supporting us to feel the beauty and stillness from within which is the greatest support we can give ourselves ..

  65. I remember growing up, seeing a cartoon character of a kid who had a comfort blanket. Never having had anything like this, not even a teddy bear I wanted to take everywhere like some do, this was a very foreign concept to me it’s true. But now at the age of 40 I can look back and see that busyness has been this comfort blanket for me. ‘Are you free to catch up?’ ‘Would you like to go on a date and connect?’ ‘Would you want to talk about the situation we really need to?’ – no, no and no, ‘I’m sorry’ I would say ‘I’m just too busy right now’. I talk like there will be a day in the near future that I will be free – but there never is in reality. Your words here Maree inspire me to finally look underneath at what I am truly avoiding and hiding from feeling in my life.

  66. When I am anxious I tend to be left ‘alone’, in that I don’t ruffle up one’s feathers and don’t have the jealousy daggers pointing at me. That’s the running belief and them and so it’s a convenient choice – to be left alone. And when we’ve made that choice the momentum has us thinking that letting ourselves be very still, unwavering amongst the commotion that is around, will have us assaulted. The irony is that it is from the stillness within us, that we hold ourselves so solid that we do not absorb what takes place around us. We only absorb chaos, toxicity etc and call in tension and anxiety when we choose not to connect within.

  67. Anxiousness is such a huge issue in society, and one that can be supported greatly by the building of an inner connection. This inner connection becomes like a true north within the body, providing a way forth in times of anxiousness.

  68. The greatest anxiety I feel is when I am not living the love I know I am. Once I begin to live it, this tension starts to gradually dissolve. Every time when I feel anxiety come back, I would go deeper into discovering where I can deepen my love.

  69. ‘Anxiety may be there as my personal little champion to help me be all of me whenever I am taking another step, and that is something I can now deeply appreciate.’ This is exactly how I experienced my anxiousness this morning and without a judgement on myself for being anxious I appreciated how I had taken the next step and did not let the anxiousness rule the rest of my day.

  70. Thanks Maree for opening up awareness to what anxiety is, a form of enjoining life in all its ‘chaos’ to avoid connecting back to the stillness and loveliness with-in. It truly does make me wonder at the notion that chaos is preferred and can win out over the beauty of what’s in our essence.

  71. Chakra Puncture has really helped me to sink, connect and be with stillness in the most beautiful and natural way, and this became a marker in my body that has became stronger and stronger.

  72. Almost everyday my top lip tingles. And initially I thought something was wrong with me. But the messages from the body can be our friends and a gentle nudge for us to change how we are living. I do wonder what this lip is saying but I can only understand the messages when I stop judging and open up to feeling.

  73. It’s amazing how often we accept anxiety as ‘just part of life’, for example when we have exams or an event coming up that requires preparation, but what if we didn’t have to be stressed about this and we had a CHOICE how we were going to live, while that particular date/time came around TO US and not us to it.

  74. Its when life throws us one of those more extreme moments that we get to test out how we are progressing with anxiety issues and so forth. It always an opportunity to let go some more, and stay really present with ourselves.

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