520 thoughts on “Girls and Contact Sports: What are We not Discussing?”

1. How many roles can we play that keep us from the Truth of who we innately are, because until we reconnect to our essences or Soul we are on the tread mill of lies.

2. To have an in-depth conversation about this and how we brutalise a female body we need to understand that when we are born we are precious. I was reminded of this fact just recently while out shopping I saw a 6 week old baby in a pouch being carried around by the grandparent. The grandparent was carrying this baby as though it was the most precious package in the world and it is. It was easy to feel just how precious the baby is. As we all grow from babies to adulthood, that preciousness gets bludgeoned so that we cannot feel our preciousness or sensitivity at all. I now understand why this happens and why it happens to women especially. Females are subjugated from young to disassociate from their stillness, sensitivity and preciousness and instead they are encouraged to be the complete opposite, racy, hard and in constant motion. Why? Because the Astral plane and for now the Astral plane runs the show and we are all puppets to this consciousness. The female represents the Stillness before motion. Currently the entire world is in motion so that the spirit that is separated from the soul can stay separated to keep the world in motion, to do that bludgeon all females as they carry the potential to bring the stillness and we have a world that doesn’t change.
   Allow all females to express and move the sacredness they come from and the world would change very rapidly because actually the male loves the stillness of the female because it reminds them they have this quality equally too, and just like in the female example their sensitivity and preciousness they were born with is squashed from young too.

3. So much in life has become about making things seem a certain way and like a wolf in sheep’s clothing the outrageous mis-in-formation will be exposed as more of society wakes to the torture our bodies have been placed under.

4. This is a concern, the growth of girls/women attempting to do sports that are aggressive full stop. Once upon a time I was doing heavy lifting of weights in the gym and it was all to be accepted, to say to people I was a strong person.

   Now the gym has gone and I do light exercise to keep my body supple, strong and fit to its biological age. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone anymore.

   Learning to be the true woman that I am and have always been from the day I birthed…

5. We all feel the difference❤️ in those who hold there essence😇 as an essential quality that delivers the innate Love❤️ we all come from so is it any wonder that our wayward spirit👽 deceit-fully plays every game in the book to keep us from feeling the Truth💡 of our Inner-Most-Essence🔥 or Soul🤞 as presented by Serge Benhayon.

   1. gregbarnes888 I watched Serge Benhayon TV last night and watching and listening to the conversation he was having with Rebecca Baldwin, you can feel that there is not a mean or abusive bone in that man’s body that he lives what he presents and you can actually feel heaven exuding from him. Serge Benhayon represents the true union or at-one-ment with God, this is the true meaning of the word religion.

      1. Absoulutely Mary as adding to what you have shared would only take away from the amazing contribution you have shared so silence or stillness is observed with much Love.

6. Absolutely, many girls will have to heal and deal with this harm further down the line.

7. Both women and men, girls and boys, we all have a side to us that is vulnerable and sensitive – this too needs to be equally honoured in both sexes and alongside physical health and stamina. One does not need to come at the expense of the other, for when both are considered and allowed, then true balance can come from that.

   1. Henrietta both sexes are vulnerable and sensitive. The body is made up of the same, slight variation of the hormones and reproductive system and thats about it. So it’s ok not to keep up with each other, it’s about remaining equal of another.

8. Sports can be done in a way that supports the body and our connection with the body. Sports can also be done in a way that does not support the body and pushes it to extremes and hence disconnects us from the body. The latter is sadly more common in my society, in my experience at least.

   1. Henrietta chang,I agree there is a way to exercise that does not harden our bodies or put our bodies into further drive. It’s called Move-fit. I have never been a fitness fan, but I so enjoy Move-fit as I can feel the difference in my body from following the exercise program. I have far more vitality and feel stronger in my body which gives me more energy. I was explaining to someone recently my daily schedule and they were amazed, they shared that at 65 I’m doing more than they are in their 30’s and they exercise, but at the end of their exercise routine they feel exhausted, whereas I feel full of vitality and raring to go.

9. I chose to do a lot of sport as a teenager growing up – it was a safe arena for me to excel in and this also meant that I got some attention from my father who was a lot into sports at the time too. At the time it was also a convenient way for me to deal with my emotions and my insecurities – the sports allowed me to harden up and not feel so much of what was happening. This is often seen as an acceptable and ‘good’ way of dealing with our issues and emotions as a teenager: ‘give them something to focus on, exercise is healthy and builds confidence and character’ is what I heard others say. Of course years down the track I then had to face the very things that I did not want to deal with at the time, and that was a lot of layers to deal with, some of which are still peeling off today!

10. Hiding any true connection we have in our bodies through contact sports only delays the natural nurturing and sensitivity in women and the true tenderness and sensitivity in men.

11. It’s quite the set up isn’t it, remove boys into toxic masculinity by hardening them up, make them competitive and make everything about their value to do with either intellectual or physical performance, and then invite girls to be equal to that. Not an ounce of this mentality honours the inner person or the true qualities of each gender and how that might express itself naturally through the physical body. We are still so far from true equality because it has nothing to do with the body or it’s abilities, it’s about the equal essence within every person, something that is continually overlooked, including in the education system.

    1. Absoulutely, Melinda, so much is missing from a school room, and when children are asked to be still and connect through their breath, as in the Gentle Breath Meditation, amazing-ness can become the norm in these class-rooms.
       For more on the Gentle Breath Meditation go to:
       http://www.unimedliving.com/search?keyword=Free+Gentle+Breath+Meditation

       1. gregbarnes888 I have spoken to teachers that have introduced the Gentle Breath Meditation to the class of children and they love it, as it brings them straight back to their essence which they are still aware of.

    2. Neither girls or boys are honoured for their true self, their inner self, ‘Not an ounce of this mentality honours the inner person or the true qualities of each gender and how that might express itself naturally through the physical body.’

       1. Absoulutely 😇 Lorraine❤️, life will be very different 🚦 when we all understand that we all about being 🔥 and not doing 👽 and in that connection 😇 we return to that innate Inner-being 🦉.

12. “Or do we want to raise our girls to be the sensitive, self-nurturing, gorgeous women they all are on the inside?” YES.

13. After putting my body on the line for zero gain it is time to cross the line and deepen the tender delicate man we all naturally are.

14. In having to hide what they feel and be tough men top the ‘leaderboard’ of suicide. By getting women to harden up and be like the guys to be equal what will that lead the women into? Is it worth celebrating equality if both genders are increasingly becoming ill and discontent?

    1. Interesting statistic Leigh, as most men look up to the tuff guys as a role models, maybe we could look into the persona the tuff person has to put on and the driving force behind it?

       1. Yes, who and what is behind the ‘tough persona’?

15. “Inherent within the girl is the woman that is to be with all of her tenderness, stillness, sacredness and joy.” And yet I heard this week about a young woman wrestler…. why? What is there to be proud? Where is the delicacy, tenderness and sacredness of the woman in that body? Yet is acclaimed as a ‘good thing’.

16. What we are not discussing indeed. There are many things we are not discussing and should have the discussion as to why we think or feel things such as this are good or not good as it is these discussions that bring greater awareness.

    1. Opening up the conversation is certainly a way to bring awareness about a topic and allow some healthy questions to arise.

17. Forcing our physical selves to attain something that our physicality isn’t suited for is fighting who we are. In the long term they’ll be physical consequences we have to deal with.

    1. Frequently there are many consequences, maybe further down the line for some, for toughening up and not honouring what our body is saying to us.

18. I have heard it said that sport in schools is a good way for the pupils to release their frustration and anger, or the stress and anxiety they often carry in life. Is it really? And surely it would behove us to start looking at why these young people are under so much stress in the first place and support them to find ways of staying clear without taking stuff on that is going to bring on anxiety or nervous behaviour.

19. When reading this I have to wonder what types of illness will occur in the bodies of the ladies who drive themselves to achieve such an accolade of being accepted for the rugby league. I know from my own experience of doing martial arts that everything is registered in the body and we never get away scot-free.

20. I know a lot of girls that play contact sport and they talk a lot about their injuries. I also observe how hard the body has to become in order to play those sports and also observe how these sport do not support a girl/woman to be delicate/tender/precious with herself.

    1. Yes the hardening of their bodies feels very sad t me. And what issues are they storing up in their body for their future? Is it really worth it to step away from their innate delicacy and sacredness?

       1. The hardening up of our bodies away from our natural delicateness does feel sad now, it is a denial of who we are.

21. One of the best Australian boxers was described as going into an almost homicidal behaviour pattern before every fight, allowing him to fight with substantial arthritis in his hands. That is extreme, but lower levels of aggression are very helpful in contact sports and sport stars are then celebrated in business as role models, something that has always struck me as strange, because ‘winning’ in business is considered to be very similar to ‘winning’ in contact sports.

22. We have developed so much gender discordance and this is an example of it. Women trying to outdo men; men lost without the true qualities of women in society; a dog eat dog hostility that is so so far from our natural expression and connection.

    1. And so young women lose their connection with their natural delicateness and sacredness, ‘How can a young woman connect with her tender sensitivity when she has already spent several years disconnecting from her physicality in order to compete with and mix it with the boys?’

23. In light of the ever rising illness and disease rates and the evident fact that domestic violence actually increases around times of football or rugby tournaments, this is certainly not a step forward in the direction of true health and well-being.

24. AFL and Rugby League are rough sports, causing plenty of damage to boys and now girls. However, they are very popular with many parents wanting their children to participate.

25. I absolutely agree that this should be a topic for an open forum discussion to talk about what we truly want for our children, who were not so long ago the babies who were cherished and nurtured because of this out of this world sensitivity. And we don’t loose this sensitivity we only put layers of hardness over it. So lets talk about where to next.

    1. Appreciating and loving delicateness in our world is something I am enjoying more and more.

26. I recently went to a community function that saw some local teens in the area talking about their hobbies, interests and aspirations. Apart from Law being a very popular subject amongst them, sport seemed to be the most common denominator in all the girls speeches. From spare time fillers to hobbies to favourite subjects at school – it was all about football, soccer and sport. I was a little shocked and had no idea that sport was such a big thing for girls. Being at school some 12 years ago now, most girls hated sport and would do what they could to avoid it all together!

    1. Rachael, that is a very big change you describe. I wonder what the physical and mental consequences of these changes are?

27. Thank you this is so needed to expose and lay out in the open. These questions are gold. Showing us that we have a world where things are at a great level of loss.. Yet accepted. But what if things can be different, truly different and free from the entanglement and strains we had created. That we can be moving free from those ideals of how to be and goals that are loveless. That we set new standards based on love and integrity. Now that is our way forward, first saying no and stopping this abuse from occuring.

    1. Saying no to abuse can only be done once we recognise it as abuse – and this is something many are not yet ready to accept. However, as you have so beautifully said Danna, the fact of opening up the topic for conversation and for all to question is indeed gold so that we can at least begin to realise there might just be something that is not quite right in the balance of things…

28. The hardness that a woman has to go into to save a goal in soccer for example has a very detrimental effect on a woman’s body but if we are not prepared to be honest about this we will put the long standing ill effects down to something else other than sport.

    1. I agree Elizabeth – the girls are not feeling the effects now as they are so hardened in their bodies and probably pumped on the recognition that saving the goal has won them. But sure, what are the long term effects of not only the physical activity of contact sports but what that constant hardening in the body, the bracing they have to go into to, what does that look like after 20 years?

       1. A lot of ex-professional athletes seem to be running to obesity. Others are keeping in shape but pay the price of hardness in their body for decades. Neither seems desirable.

29. Football is brutal enough on the body as it is… and one day all of these contact sports will be looked back on in appalled amazement.

30. Let’s not deviate any further away from the true strength of women’s sensitivity, grace, tenderness and nurturing qualities.

    1. As parents we can choose to honour our children, and who they innately are, ‘do we want to raise our girls to be the sensitive, self-nurturing, gorgeous women they all are on the inside?’

31. Young women are also competing with young men for the amount of alcohol they can drink with disastrous results.

32. No wonder women are disconnected to their sacredness, when they play completive sports that harden up the body.

33. And there also is this idea that periods are inconvenience when it comes to playing sports as well. Men and women are different. Our bodies are different. But we are equal. Women have tried all kinds of things already to try to be equal to men by being like men and we have to admit that it has not worked. If we don’t allow ourselves to know our essence, we would never feel enough.

34. Once felt and acknowledged the qualities of a true woman within me I could not go back to playing football as I did when I was a child at primary school. It is very true that we are not raised to know who we are and instead taught to compete with one another, a forever battle between us until the time comes when both men and women throw in the towel and say ‘that is enough.’

35. These are great questions because when we are in the hustle and bustle of society we often don’t think clearly of what we want or not, we just tend to go with what is the norm even though deep down it may not feel right.

36. With this AFL for girls it seems like all is done to engrain in both girls and boys that toughness and competition is mainstream. How lost we are from who we really are within: tender, still, sacred and joyful. And reading about the raising figures of girls joining, in the end it will be the bodies who need to and will speak loud that this is not the way.

37. For me personally it has been such at process from playing rugby on the field at lunch time to drinking pints in the pub and keeping up with the boys. All the while knowing that this tough, hard and tomboy I was playing to was not who I truly was. I am deeply sensitive, fragile and precious yet I stand with authority and power that is unwavering. It’s the unwavering part that I am totally appreciating right about now as this has been a steady, consistent dedication to letting go of the what was not me and surrendering to the magnificence within. As i say a steady and deepening path that is forever being walked.

38. Thank you for writing this blog, having myself played sports to a high level in my 20’s, and striving for ‘equality’ and having now through Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine found my connection to my essence, and my femininity, I understand that there is an ‘equality’ that we can achieve without there being any need for competition.

39. Having seen photos of women boxing and also wrestling with other women I shudder to see how celebrated they are, all for the excuse of gender equality. Why do women strive to be so like men? We also see it in the desire to get CEO status in the boardroom. Why don’t we teach young girls to celebrate their femininity and sensitivity – and our differences? We have two sexes for a good reason…..

40. Competition in any form does not foster the power that a woman innately has. When you add the mantle of physical sport, you are taking a further step away from that power and strength, which has nothing to do with being the toughest woman on a sporting field.

41. Girls learning to compete in the world by playing on men’s terms can’t be a good way to go forward in society. For one thing equality will never be had by competing. We need to work together with our own strengths that together complete the whole. Secondly, it feels unnatural to me for girls to become ‘little men’ and ‘beat them at their own game’. I think we have tried this and have ended up doing everything a man can do plus all the home duties we have always done = exhaustion and ill health.

42. Is the word ‘equality’ the right one to orient a true departure from the status quo, following the word ‘gender’? What would be the true expression that humanity needs? Would it even have the word gender in it?

43. Denying our sensitivity and our delicateness for both women and men is a denial of who we are in truth and a denial of our natural expression as a humanity.

44. What sort of equality is this? Are we equally lowering the standards of wellness and care for ourselves and upping the standards of abuse and competition? It certainly is not a world that makes one feel at ease to be themselves when competition and abuse are not in any way part of our true nature.

45. I used to enjoy watching contact sports of all types, but eventually I had to come to the realisation that these sports are brutal on the body of those playing especially seeing the effects on the players bodies first hand as a Physiotherapist. I simply could not watch it anymore knowing the forces and harm that was being done to the bodies of those playing. It did not make sense to me to cheer on people hurting themselves and each other. So I stopped watching them.

46. It’s true that the ‘GI Jane’ lifestyle is becoming more and more glamorous and girls are being encouraged to do more sports like kickboxing, martial arts and rugby, and this is having a big impact on how girls feel towards themselves but also towards other girls, where relationships between them can nowadays be quite hostile and charged.

47. We tolerate sport because it entertains us. Drop the need for entertainment and sport will drop away altogether.

48. As a girl growing up I was encouraged to do sports competitively but I refused feeling the abuse it put on my body. I have no scientific proof but today my body is the proof that throughout growing up I have not suffered from painful periods that show the hardening women put their bodies through.

49. For many years I practiced a very strong form of Yoga, doing a lot of free-balancing and headstands etc, I did this daily and I began to notice how masculine my body started to look and the testosterone levels in my body rose and my periods became sporadic. Is was clear to me the female body is not designed for certain sports or for pushing it beyond its limits, as we can begin to adopt more masculine features crushing our natural, beautiful and unique feminine qualities.

50. Maybe…instead of focusing on the sameness of gender equality we should drop the e and make it gender quality – quality in that both men and women honor their own innate qualities and how they complement and activate the innate qualities of the other gender.

51. I have never really been a sports fan. Played a little sport as a young women, but really none of this interested me. There is however much that is offered by sport that I can understand why someone would choose to be involved. In Australia, sports has almost religious zeal for some. What I can feel is that people crave community and connection for that is what’s on offer. But it is at the expense of our bodies. Look at any sports persons body and mental health after involvement at elite levels and its not good. So really we do need to ask ourselves is the connections and community we seek through sport true? We have say no its not, for if it was true we would never have to place anyone’s body on the line, we would never place the importance of winning over relationships, we would never take sides.

52. We all crave what is innately within in us be it women or men, yet as you so clearly describe it is unfortunately not what we are living hence the desperate acts to try and cover up what we have left behind.

53. We are in a way robbing our young girls and boys of their sensitivity, tenderness, sacredness and grace when we introduce them to any form of sport. Because when we truly connect to our body’s quality, there is not one part of our body that would say yes to the physical act of sport. It makes us harden our body and disconnects us to the quality and depth that it holds.

54. When we champion sport to the detriment of our fragility we are not only cementing hardness into our bodies but hardness and competition into society – in this we do not admit to our vulnerability and fragility below the surface and continue to perpetuate many of the ideals and beliefs we are owned by.

    1. Beautifully shared Michelle and I agree. It is our choice to align to the energy first to enable us to say yes to sports and the consequences of this is huge. It will take a lot of effort for our body to clear what is not true, loving or supportive. When we are in activity of a sport and our body is screaming with pain for us to stop, do we listen?

       1. Sometimes when I observe people out jogging I notice how awkward they look and in many cases how much discomfort and pain they are in too. I remember observing a man in London climbing his front steps to his door in such exhaustion after a bike ride he looked close to collapse. It does beg the question why, doesn’t it?

55. Sport promotes aggression, competition, individualism and partisan division. How can any of this help foster the Sacredness, grace, sweetness and inner strength of any man or woman? All it seems to do is constantly have us chasing a trophy on the horizon somewhere. When we smash ourselves in this pursuit we just end up empty.

56. Is it possible that exercise can actually cement us further into ideals and beliefs and harden our bodies against the love that is on offer constantly.

57. The AFL pitch is no place to nurture the tenderness, stillness and sacredness inherent within these girls, however the Girl 2 Woman Festival is. Currently offered in Australia, it plays an enormous role in true connection, nurturing the whole family’s understanding of tenderness, stillness and sacredness as being natural, inherent and vital qualities of the women of our future.

58. If gaining equality is mutually being able to harm oneself and others then I’d rather not nor encourage it. Not just physically but examing how I treat myself in everyday, because how I live encourges or inspires others to live the same way. We need to ask – how am I living because other people are going to watch and possibly follow?

59. I grew up playing my own version of this women’s AFL, except I did not bludgeon myself with a ball and into other people’s bodies. I did the bludgeoning myself with being super super hard on myself, and living in so much drive to be a good person, an excellent worker, a good friend etc…. And gosh the hardness felt awful in my body. It was only when I decided to start upping the self-love, the self-care and healing the unresolved hurts that lay within my body, that the hardness started to melt, and underneath I discovered the delicate, tender, precious womanly nature that lay buried underneath.

60. I was a tom boy to a degree when growing up, and I can remember several times I would be trying to meet the boys in what ever games at school and to do so I had to suppress and deny what I was truly feeling within. There needs to be more support and encouragement for girls to be embraced for the sweet, delicate and loving beings that we are.

    1. Well said, Natalie, there does seem to be a lure to be like the boys (I see it in the 6 and 7 year old girls when they play football at school) but it’s easy to see why these activities are being championed, as there is no one having the conversations that inspire the young girls to honour their tenderness.

61. I find it difficult to watch women playing a contact sport like rugby because I know how much it hurts when someone elbows me in the breast by mistake let alone tackling someone full force on purpose. To see these women put themselves through this in the name of sport is painful to watch, as it makes no sense to me and only goes to confirm how hardened we can get in order to not feel what we are doing to ourselves.

62. These physical activities are just another way to suppress the power of the sacred feminine.

    1. Hear hearJenny, this is so true. There are many forms and ways we do this and sport is only one aspect of it. There are thousands and thousands of flavours and ways to suppress and give our power away. Once we understand what is going on, then we are more able to see the world for what it currently is and more able to make wiser and more loving choices to not align to the energy that causes us to seek the comfort or stimulation in any of what has been offered to us by creation.

    2. Championed as equalness and women ‘can do; everything that a man “can do’. But what are we all truly doing to support one another?

63. I really do look forward to the day when men refuse to play the intense contact sports that are seen as entertainment now. These sports just deepen and harden in more the shell that men surround themselves with, so that they do not have to feel the deeply tender quality that is their nature.

64. Thank you for exposing the harm that is hidden in this notion of “equality” it seems like we are blind to the fact of how harmful it is to ones body when we partake in sports that ask us to compete let alone hard physical sports where there is higher chance of getting harmed.
    One day it will be known how detrimental it is to engage in such activities.

65. Thank you Anonymous, this is such a great topic to discuss. As a society we need to find ways to support our young people to maintain their sensitivity, preciousness and tenderness and this very much includes looking at sport and being honest about whether this is something that supports those qualities or not.

66. The very fact that women will often take the contraceptive pill in certain doses to put off their period, in order to do contact and other sport, shows the extent to which the woman is denying their power and role as a woman in our world – we know now that a woman’s period is an amazing energetic clearing as well as having its important physical functions – a clearing that is crucial for the woman and those around her. To disrupt the natural rhythms of the body and alter the hormonal system plays havoc with the body and so also prevents the woman from connecting to her true power.

67. This is a great question Anonymous, to me there feels like there’s something very wrong with girls doing aggressive contact sports, and it makes me feel slightly sick that these gorgeous young women don’t mind hurting themselves for the purpose of feeding the illusion we should be “equal” with men. What if equality is not being physically equal but an innate birthright, and it doesn’t actually need to be gained or earnt?

68. In these competition-heavy sports all players end up on the losing side.

69. Are we willing to admit that contact sport is simply against the nature of any human being?

70. You are very right in saying that girls entering the world of contact sports is two steps further away from home, as men in contact sports is already an abuse on the sensitivity and tenderness of the man, let alone if the more delicate body of the girl or woman is thrown in there.

71. ‘Girls and Contact Sports: What are We not Discussing?’ What we are not discussing is how parents allow beautiful gentle, caring, loving boys assault each other under the camouflage of sport. And now they want the same fate for beautyful, nurturing, caring girls.

72. In the whole discussion about the importance of sport and movements the key ingredient that is missing is the quality of the movements and what it actually does to our body.

73. We seem to be able to fool ourselves very easily and use words like contact to give an impression that we are connecting with others in a healthy and loving way while jostling on a sports field. Does wrestling and boxing come into this category too? How is it that we can be so rough and harsh with ourselves and applaud ourselves for it, surely we have lost a form of respect for ourselves somewhere along the way.

74. Sport exposed as the counter/suppressor of the innate tenderness, delicacy and sweetness (qualities of true strength) that we all innately have and that need to be expressed to re-harmonise our world. This makes so much sense of what I have observed in my body playing sport and the behaviour of others around sport, both playing and watching.

75. Why do we need to have sports that involve contact like this…? Is the contact needed and how fun is it to live with the consequences in our body especially as we age… I wonder how much more genuinely joyful it would be to exercise in a way that truly honours our body rather than we could say beating it up…

76. A lot of my colleagues have done a lot of sport in their younger years and they are noticing as they get older the damage it has done to their bodies. We really need to look at how sport is affecting us and its long term effects.

77. When we shut down the woman or in this case the young girl growing into the woman we invite through the reflection activities or a way of being that confirms the shutting down of ourselves. It begins with how we feel as a woman or man. We are born into either a woman’s or man’s body and it is a question as to whether we are truly embracing the divine qualities that are inherent within or doing our best to find ways such as playing contact sport to numb and avoid who we truly are.

78. I recently watched a local mixed football team play and noted how in the distance you could not see or feel the difference in the male and female players as they had both become so entrenched in the momentum of speed, competition and drive that left no room for the true connect of the male and female.

79. Once we champion grace and Sacredness, we will see chasing sporting glamour for the loosing game it is. It’s self-defeating from the start, for the entire human race. Thank you Anon for highlighting it here.

    1. I love it, Joseph, turning our attention to championing Grace and Sacredness – cheer-leading, applauding, getting behind the true qualities that support and truly grow us.

80. We celebrate women doing more contact sports to ‘balance the gender gap’, but have we actually looked at what it does to men and their fitness/bodies in the first place? Something I’ve certainly seen is that more and more men are experiencing back pain, knee problems, shoulder issues etc. as a result of playing contact sports when they were younger and getting injured, and it really does have a huge impact on their quality of life as they’ve grown older. Do we want the same for women, or for this to continue?

81. Contact sport was definitely my normal when growing up in New Zealand and even if it wasn’t supposed to be, because it had contact in it there would still be an element of it pushing and being aggressive to win. The amount of hardness that we had to go into was extraordinary but when that is what you are encouraged to do it seems normal.

82. These qualities are beautiful to feel in girls or women, so what is going on that we do not foster and cherish them, ‘Inherent within the girl is the woman that is to be with all of her tenderness, stillness, sacredness and joy.’

83. “Does what we currently offer support our girls to claim their femininity or does it militate against it?” – Excellent question Colleen. Whenever you set up a program that will be delivered to the public or write/produce/work on something that is going out to humanity it’s crucial that we look at what exactly we are offering, and what the impact might be on society. For example, if we were to design a new technology we would need to look at HOW that product will be used, or with writing an article WHAT are we truly putting out there for the world to read and trust?

84. Indeed what may appear as equal opportunities may really be a road to increasing competition at the expense of hardening our bodies further away from its innate tenderness and preciousness.

85. Colleen, you ask great questions here about how we are raising our girls. If we, as a society continue to encourage our young women to engage in harmful activities like the ones that you describe then we have to take responsibility for the consequences, that is that we are creating a world where more and more women are disconnected from their sacredness and beauty as a woman. This then affects how they feel about themselves, how they look after their bodies, how they are in relationships, how they mother etc.

86. You may observe life and count doors that are open for men and doors that are open to women and decry the fact as an injustice. If this is your way, it is a matter of having the same doors where you can walk. The other option is to pay attention to what is going to happen to you if you open this or that door. You are not just entitled to walk in alongside men; you are also enticed into start moving like men and bring an incredible amount of self-harm into your body in the same way men do. There are some doors that are worth not opening.

    1. Love what you have said Eduardo – there certainly are some doors not worth opening. Our race opened a door aeons ago that was not worth opening and we keep opening more doors of the same kind hoping to find the mythical thing we are seeking outside ourselves, when all the time we could simply go within and find Heaven.

87. I couldn’t think of anything worse. All women know how painful it is when we get accidentally hit in the breast and men know how painful it is to be kicked in the groin, so why would we consciously choose to put ourselves in harm’s way. It makes no sense.

88. The statistics you present for women getting involved in these hard core games is saddening and disappointing , what is happening to the true woman? ‘For those who prefer to express the precious and delicate nature of a woman and hence, that of girls, this is a sorry indictment of the lack of value we as a society place on femaleness, if not on the complete undermining of all qualities associated with the expression of true womanliness.’

89. And sport in general needs to be looked at and observed from the view of – is this really healing for our body?

90. I feel we have fallen for the biggest cosmic lie by competing to be “as good/as strong, as men”. Have we gone loopy. There were two sexes put on earth, and two divine ways to express. A woman’s true expression definitely does not come from “being one of the boys” it comes from the power and grace her body enhouses in her womb. After feeling and connecting to the sacredness of all women it is incomprehensible that this could be dismissed for “rough housing”.

91. “Doing it tough” serves noone. We are delicate and tender human beings and anything that does not support us to live in this way is harming us.

92. The choices we make in raising our children today literally create the future we will live with, and I agree this choice to bring women and girls into more “tough” style physical sports is the opposite direction of the future grace that could be on offer.

93. The thought of going onto a field or court to play a sport with the intensity of what it brings simply couldn’t happen again. Back when I did thou I never thought twice, it was what you did and you were on a mission to win, what ever it takes. Not in the sense of physical abuse to the opposition but for myself and not even blinking an eye lid.

94. “Inherent within the girl is the woman that is to be with all of her tenderness, stillness, sacredness and joy.” So what happens to this tenderness stillness sacredness and joy if we ask our sensitive loving caring 6 year olds to harden and toughen up their bodies to play a sport that was never designed for women and in truth not for men. We have taken equality to the extremes at the expense of the woman’s body. What sort of women will these 6 year olds grow up to be if they can’t feel the innateness of what it is to be in a woman’s body. And the sad thing is that it is the men that lose out too because they don’t get to feel what it is to be with a woman that knows who she is from the inside out.

95. If in the name of gender equality we as women supress our feminine qualities, we won’t have found any equalness at last, because we would have lost our wholeness in the way.

96. “The ABC News recently ran a news item reporting how the Women’s National Rugby League (WNRL) is to offer female career pathways through to elite player status starting from the age of 6.” This is extremely scary and something that needs much more awareness around and discussion about. We need to ask how does playing rugby affect girls, their periods, their overall health etc because for a woman to deny her femineity is detrimental to their health and well-being.

97. As someone who played women’s touch football for a few months, I can honestly say i did it to prove that I was better if not equal to a man. It was awful and I really did not enjoy it – the only thing I enjoyed was telling a bunch of guys that I played a contact sport. But the hard reality is that when we play this sport we are not honouring our sensitivity or tenderness.

98. I am yet to meet someone ‘on the streets’ who doesn’t champion girls being able to play contact sports. It is seen as a great advance in women’s equality with men. However, I have heard many women share their experiences of playing competitive sports and how hardened and disregarding of their body they had to become to be ‘as good as the boys’. If I was cynical I would say the small print of the quote from the AFL chairman reads more like, ‘AFL will now have more consumers which is great for the sport and our pockets’. It reminds me of when marketing to women started by smoking companies, as they realised 50% of the market was not being targeting. This was sold as a liberation for women, when it was actually a harm to our health.

99. What we have come to here with the introduction of tough contact sport for young girls is the end result of the ‘imaginary’ yet oh so real battle of men versus women, and vice versa . There is no enemy – this is the biggest trick and illusion on earth. There is no battle and it cannot ever be won. The ‘opponent’ is pure love, pure wisdom and pure universal intelligence and this ‘opponent’ will never be in battle with anything or anyone. We are simply fighting against our own evolution.

100. The rise in girls wanting to box and play football has increased dramatically over the past twenty years thus increasing the numbing of their sensitivity.

101. it seems like there will continue to be more and more desensitizing activities on offer… No coincidence because if we really looked around and felt truly what was happening it would be extraordinarily devastating

     1. Yes and the rate of this activities are escalating on a grand scale. What is interesting here is that in most cases it is a far higher level of harm than before as the extreme sport is held us the ultimate ‘nova’ experience – a must do on the bucket list!

102. We really need the qualified health and well-being practitioners, doctors and dentists, who realise what is going on with this violence done to both men and women’s bodies, to set up a committee, a forum, and to contact the appropriate body and submit a document which lays down what is going on, and the damage that is being caused.

103. I would have thought that on a very practical level the soft breast tissue that women have could be damaged irreparably by contact sport, this seems to be sidestepped as even an issue. If we were to go on feeling and remove our need for this oh so false equality, we would be struck by the enormous overriding of a natural delicacy that women have, and on a deeper level, what internal anatomy are being thrown out of balance through such unnatural physicality.

104. We have become so good at fighting our true nature within, women and men alike will do crazy things in order to escape and not embrace the tenderness and sacredness which are our own natural rights. As a society we need to discuss such topics, which are creating such harm for women as this has such an impact on the way we men are encouraged to embrace our own feminity within.

105. Women and girls participating and competing in sport is deemed as a great thing for women, showing that we can do everything that men do. But with the focus on being able to compete with men on many levels what qualities of being a woman are we leaving behind? Which means what reflection of women are men receiving also?

106. The status quo that we have all allowed is further and even more brutally bashing and hardening the beautiful delicate yet powerful body of a woman. It is so clear and blatant that it can almost take your breath away that we are still allowing this to occur.

107. A most serious state of affairs the world is in where we don’t honour our sensitivity ,natural delicateness and tenderness of both women and men alike and the trends are worsening as seen here. However there is also another movement of honouring and sacredness being lived and this is very beautiful to see and really can offer the true reflection we all know inside us deeply of who we really are through Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon.

108. It makes me shudder to think of women (let alone young boys) playing full-contact sport – watching the boys and girls in primary school kicking a foam ball around in their lunch break is enough for me. On many occasions, we end up with children on the floor crying from being hurt because things have gotten too aggressive.

109. Equality, should not mean everything is done the same by each sex. Our differences are what make us such a dynamic team. I have joined the gym recently and was shocked to see the images of the ideal womens body shape at the moment, these images were displayed on all the screens in the gym and presented in the female trainers. It was very masculine image, big bums and muscular thighs, like tree trunks. This pumped up and unnatural woman shape was being championed, held up and it did not look feminine at all. We have to be careful that we don’t end up crushing woman for a second time around all in the name of “gender equality”. True equality honours differences and shows everyone an equal respect.

110. Hearing an extraordinary presentation at the weekend by Serge Benhayon at Universal medicine, it is so interesting to get to the bottom of realising the discomfort the human spirit felt when entering the male and female bodies with the divine particles that they are made of. It makes prefect sense then why the human spirit with its desire for domination champions rough sports so that the challenging, amazing body will be wounded, subdued and disabled.

111. I agree that we as women are very disconnected from our bodies and this has serious consequences when it comes to our well-being and how we take care of ourselves. Being tender and gentle are not qualities that we hold dear in western society, and I do remember as a young woman having the idea that I wanted to show I was just as strong and tough as the men. Why is this? We really do have it all confused.

112. Apart from all the obvious reasons of injury, hardening the body adversely etc. You would think that traditionally and medically it would be inadvisable to be playing rough sports at an age when the body is not yet fully formed and is very tender. Where is the medical profession???

113. Where does it all end, this constant competing and fighting for validation through what we do. Rugby is a great example of this, the men’s sport is getting bulkier, harder, faster, more velocity, unstoppable forces meeting immovable objects, place a microphone near a collision and it sounds like two ferocious stags locking horns. Apparently the impacts are becoming more and more like car crashes. And women are replicating this, thus adopting the very behaviours that are damaging men’s bodies. I have heard it said that women used to be the ones who reflected the common sense to men to rein in their excessive testosterone, acting like the most natural emollient, but if women are now copying the men, who is reining anyone in and where does it all end. Is our prostate and breast cancer rates evidence of a way of living gone wrong, a way showing that we do not thrive through this excessive drive to seek recognition through aggressive, often violent sport. And what effects does it have on young girls and why are we so keen to gain equality through competition but wont explore equality in the wider meaning of cherishing natural qualities and accepting and embracing differences that exist between men and women and are also apparent in each individual.

114. I find it hard to believe that young women still play sports such as lacrosse which feels so vicious and far from honouring the delicate nature that is so innate to women.

115. Any contact sport is full on and intense for anyone. When you look at a baby there is not an ounce of that quality in them, we are pure, divine and precious beings that have just entered into the world. For it to get to a point where contact sport is considered normal and fun, for people to go and watch and cheer this on is craziness. I’m so pleased I started to see and feel how far away from who I am when I went into this.

116. Last Christmas I was involved in a family game of back yard cricket, and its time for me to bat and my young niece comes into bowl at me and bam, she bowls me out first ball, well I wasn’t expecting that and because in back yard cricket you can’t go out first ball I get another go. So in she comes at me and I manage to hit this one straight at her and she catches it and I’m out. Her skills were exceptional, she was equal if not better than the boys of her age and I somehow felt, well for a start a little embarrassed that I got out without scoring but also a little sad that sport and competing with each others such a revered thing and now the girls are beating boys at their own game.

117. It is when we start to have conversations about this topic from this great blog we can bring more awareness to the real issues at hand. It is when we choose to ignore or collude with what we feel keeps us comfortable on such a topic that we will continue to see the rise of sports and behaviours that are far from a young girl and women’s natural way of expressing.

118. We certainly need to step back and re-evaluate what we are doing to our young girls and young women and ask ourselves why we are doing it. Why do we jump onto this bandwagon and champion tough contact sports for girls (or even boys!) There is an insidious force out there that does to want the true power of a woman to come to the fore so any mad and brutal scheme that comes to mind gets launched and all in the name of equality! It would be enough to make my blood boil if I weren’t taking great care to be the observer and understander of this.

119. We live in a world full of confusion and sadly the only thing that will make us stop and consider the rot that we willingly subscribe to is the escalating rates of illness and disease amongst all.

120. It really is a disturbing trend isn’t it… And the way it is feted is almost more disturbing

121. Such hard contact sports affects women, hardening their body to prove she can just be as competitive in any environment. When women become so driven and hardened their bodies, they can later experience issues with periods, endometriosis and infertility.

     1. A growing concern that is often downplayed of the quest for competitive wins.

122. Whilst we live in competition we will always be out of harmony regardless of our sex. The way forward is not in trying to be like another but to be true to your expression.

123. Men are too precious and sensitive to engage in these rough sports, let alone a woman’s body getting thrown in the mix. Having to tape down their breasts to play contact sport is a great indicator of the gender denial factor that women face and also the brutal activity at hand.

     1. Yet women are encouraged to go for these sorts of sports as part of ‘gender equality’. I put my vote in for the equality that you have mentioned where both genders are “too precious and sensitive to engage in these rough sports”

     2. Women tape down their breasts to play contact sports? For real?

124. Growing up being a sensitive young girl was often really challenging in a family that expected me to be tough and sometimes rough. And Ive no doubt this is the same for many young girls, who only mask their gentle and gorgeous qualites to be accepted in life. But at what cost? Thankyou Anon for exposing this all too familiar pattern.

125. We have notions of equality and it this thrown around in the likes of sport, political debates and gender conversation etc, but is any of it resembling true equality or is it aligning people to agree to a certain ideal? We can’t have equality while we still carry hardness, protection, the pursuit of individualism – because simply it would be coming from our heads and not a true settlement in the body.

126. It’s so sad that we are held under the belief that we need to toughen up. This affects girls as well as boys. We are creating a world full of protection against each other, and this is played out on the sports field. To know that this is being encouraged is deeply concerning.

     1. I agree Rebecca, men and women everywhere are told to ‘man-up’, basically encouraged to shutdown everything they are feeling and to protect themselves.

127. The question we could be asking is, is sport and competition truly supportive and loving for women and men? Instead we are championing the equality of our leagues. This is typical of our current way of living where it seems we’d prefer to spend a thousand hours on how to improve a bomb, rather than one or two on asking what is actually going on. It would be nice to say, ‘oh well it’s just a game’ but as you powerfully show Anonymous it’s one with super serious consequences.

128. Colleen this is an absolutely brilliant expose of what is lying behind this ‘push’ to have girls as you so aptly say it ‘bludgeon and numb’ their bodies. To think that girls are going to be ‘trained’ as early as 6 is deeply disturbing to read. This is a front page news article that is a must read from all.

129. I agree Colleen we need to raise our girls supporting them to stay connected to their sensitivity, problem is many parents have lost connection with their own sensitivity so do not want this reflected to them by their child. So they encourage them to go into sports that will knock it (literally) out of them. Often this is not conscious but it is something that we need to bring more awareness around and the harm these sports have on our kids. And that as parents we can rekindle our own sensitivity and thus allow it to be in our kids.

130. This sort of competition and force on the body to go hard and work through the pain of physical violence in competitive sport, reminds of how the tampon adverts go….push through it, ignore it and ‘get on with life’ as if some how being woman and being gentle and being all that we naturally bring, is a problem. I know woman can be strong, I have no doubt about that, but how we express this and ‘getting on with life’ and the denial of our natural way is an issue.

131. When I read this question – “Would the women of ancient Rome have seen it as a step towards their equality had they been invited to enter the gladiator’s forum as ‘equal’ combatants with the male gladiators?” – the answer was a clear no and it gave me good food for thought as how far we have come to think that this is OK (and not in a good kinda way 😉 ).

132. When I think about how much contact sport I played and how intense this actually was, even the games that not necessarily involved actual contact but the mental abuse you would use to try and physic out the other team was just as bad. My body cringes at the thought of such abuse.

133. What is so brilliant about kicking a ball around and tackling people so that they fall to the ground? The whole thing is quite absurd and not a worthy human activity in any sense. The Emperor’s New Clothes is such a pertinent comment the way we have sold ourselves out to an illusion.

134. No absolutely not, Brendan. And yet, we continue to collude in this because we ourselves still play the competition game.

135. What we are not discussing is historical aeons of suppressing, abusing, disregarding and denying the strength, significant and balance of women’s qualities and how it is only with these, alongside men, that we will rediscover true unity.

136. Some days my colleagues come into work battered and bruised from injuries they have sustained from doing all sorts of contact sports and we have a bit of a discussion as to whether their need for sport is worth the pain. Eventually the body protects so much that we are forced to listen to it.

137. “Is this not one of those topics that needs a truly open forum discussion so that we can, as a collective, discuss what we truly want for our children as a foundation for the question, where to next?”
     Is it possible that this great article presented by Colleen, can be added to so that if the men started to live in a way that opened them up to their sensitivity, nurturing, stillness, sacredness and tenderness, we would all benefit? As Colleen has shared if the women were open to these loving ways of being responsible for who we all equally are then the men would change as well as being competitive. Then more women would get to deepen the same way and find the same connection and thus we could bring about a change without any competition? So then the question is what would happen to all the competitive sports?

138. It seems like a very good business move on the part of both these football codes to include and grow a women’s and girls league, not only from the the perspective of having women play the game, but also to get women more interested in those sports, making them life long fans. However for these new business venture to be successful there needs to be willing future players and willing future fans to make it a success. Why then is it that women and girls want to participate in these sports in the first place? To fit in, be part of the crowd, be one of the boys? It’s like we see all of these as the only options in being a women in society and that for a woman to live completely with her very natural, sensitive and delicate natures is somehow seen as a weakness.

139. It is really easy for someone to get defensive about a girl or women’s right to play contact sports, and its an easy argument to claim gender equality through equal access to sporting endeavour. But as the article title asks, what are we really avoiding addressing in this push for more girls in hardline sports. We neglect the true nature of boys and girls, as we push them to become sporty and at what expense. If we really stopped and reflected on our biology we would accept that a woman’s cycle and soft breast tissue was not designed for sport, and that a man is also not made to crush another man. We hark back to gladiatorial contests but this is not something to revel in, it was not a time to glamourise. We have an opportunity to address gender equality but it is an illusion if we think this will happen through sporting equality.

140. How can we honour and cherish our young girls when we are championing them to compete against each other in a contact sport?

141. ‘Or do we want to raise our girls to be the sensitive, self-nurturing, gorgeous women they all are on the inside?’ Yes we do Anonymous, but we are such a minority at the moment. Most parents are so exhausted, or stressed., or conformist that they do not see the harm that is being caused to their daughters . . . or perhaps they do at some unconscious level and encourage them to play AFL because they are jealous of the beauty and tenderness that their daughters still have a connection with. There are many factors contributing to this ill move towards brutal sports for women.

142. It is only by honouring the true qualities if what it means to be a woman in this world, that we will become truly equal to men, as the reflection that we then offer to men will potentially inspire them to also truly value their own innate qualities making both men and women deeply respectful and appreciative of each other.

143. It’s interesting that I so not wanted to look at this blog – I have always felt a great resistance to sport and to what felt like women becoming harder – but until now not really realised how much of this resistance I could feel from within, such as feeling belligerent and hostile towards the words themselves and the effect this was having on my body and consequently other people’s bodies. Is it because I am feeling an antipathy within and an energy towards the very words themselves?

144. The animal kingdom is full of examples of big, strong and evolved for a purpose species, we are not one of them! We try to emulate them but always at the cost to ourselves. We can’t make a silk purse out of a pig’s ear, old saying states, but we continue to try and make pigs ear our of our silk purse!

145. ‘bludgeoning such qualities out of existence’ – strong words but well placed when we consider how far we are deviating from supporting our young women to embrace, respect and treasure the qualities that bring balance and harmony to the world.

146. To be continuing on a trajectory of more and more combative, competitive sport indicates to me the waywardness and madness of our current relationship with our bodies, each other and life.

147. If we encourage our young women to harden themselves to ‘be like the men’, then how will our men ever remember that their true nature is one of absolute tenderness and sensitivity, if no woman is left to reflect this truth back to them?

148. What strikes me as most important in all of this, is that girls are provided with the same opportunity to celebrate their femininity qualities alongside the push to include them in contact sports. And the same for boys, give them the chance and the message that being tender and showing sensitivity is equally as ok as being a tough man sports guy and allow each individual to choose their own path. For at the moment we don’t seem to have a lot of choice thrust in front of us, it seems to be sink or swim in a tough guy world, and that to me doesn’t seem healthy.

149. Being rough is a sure sign of denying our being female, but being soft is no different. Both are leaving the truth of who we are as women and both are abusive to ourselves and to others.

150. I recently watched a drama on TV in a European country where it was portrayed as usual to objectify women and how many of these women slept with an older man in exchange for their college being paid for. It’s quite a common thing as I understand but it was interesting to see how women’s bodies were used in this way by the man and the woman. And I wonder if there is any difference between that use of the body and a woman or a man fighting in front of an audience for the audience’s gratification and their exchange for money or recognition or whatever it is they get from it. These seem extreme examples but how often do I use my body as a means of getting something at its expense? Working when it needs to rest, resting when it needs to work, eating the wrong foods. Everytime I am disrespectful to my body I am basically reflecting back to others it’s ok to be abusive to oneself for outside ‘gain’.

151. The Way of the Livingness, Esoteric Womens Health, Well Being for Women, the Girl to Women Project and Sacred Movement have set amazing foundations and platforms to support the sacredness, tender, preciousness and innate beauty for us all to fully claim and live our uniqueness in a world that is very much searching to understand and belong somewhere. If the true reflection of who we are as women is offered is it possible girls wont be looking for recognition and belonging in the ‘sports arena’ as much?

152. There is a rise in women taking up extreme sports. This is going against everything our body and being is here to do, which is express the sacredness and true beauty of a woman’s essence.

153. Where are we to demand of our young girls to be in ” a society that drives girls to toughen up and harden their bodies in exactly the same way as boys are exhorted to do – to the absolute detriment of their own emerging femininity.” Where is the honouring and treasuring of our delicateness and femininity and where is the honouring of young boys and their sensitivity also. Showing there is another way by the way we choose to live is the only way to offer a different reflection of our innate sacredness and love and the treasuring of this as our young grow up and this definitely needs to be talked about and shared.

154. I think one of the things with harsh sports or exercise is that they can be a way that we numb out from our body and essentially suppress our feelings – for both men and women. If we were raised to value our feelings and the intelligence of our body, to not suppress them but be open to understanding what they are showing us then perhaps we would be better equipped to deal with all that we sense and feel and not seek to numb out from it…

     1. And we can do that today (as a starter to arrest the deviation from what is natural)… value our feelings and the intelligence of our body and build the care and respect we have for our innate and much needed qualities.

155. This is a topic that I’m sure could lead to much debate – women have the right to do anything, which is true. But we as women have been fighting to be able to do anything in a man’s world. Until we address that, we’re stuck in a place where we will fight for the right to play rugby. It’s all a bit upside down, inside out and back to front – so much so that we don’t even know who we are.

156. How can we call something, where we intentionally run into and are more than rough with each other, good, when all it causes is bruises and injuries, physically and emotionally?

157. Have we as women merely taking on another way of being and moving which denies our inherent tender and precious nature just as men have done?

158. “Inherent within the girl is the woman that is to be with all of her tenderness, stillness, sacredness and joy. Rather than allowing these qualities to unfold from within as each female child is nurtured and confirmed by the adults in her life to be who she naturally is, we seem to be currently intent upon bludgeoning such qualities out of existence.” This is very true, and a sad reflection of where we have come to in the human race. Fortunately though, there are some women, Natalie Benhayon being a wonderful example, who are showing women that there is another way to be, and that in order to be equal to men, women do not have to be hard and tough. Our equality in truth is more about how we honour and respect each other for our own innate qualities, and to then celebrate that, rather than to compete with one another to be ‘better’.

159. How wayward are we when we champion our young people partaking in activities that harm their bodies? Akin to colluding in the promotion of alcohol we are so way off track.

     1. I very much agree Matilda, we have made things normal that are not normal to our true nature.

     2. Yes, agreed and also to not recognise that we are doing so – i.e to think or champion something as being ‘healthy’ when it is actually harming…

160. The reflection of nature and what happens when you over use land and just continually take is that the soil no longer supports growth. Many here, have reflected on the side effects of hard sport and training regarding problems that arise with the reproductive systems?

161. As long as sports and exercise are generally promoted as healthy without distinguishing the quality of these activities and what they do to the whole of our body and being we will be ignorant by holding on to a segment of life and considering it to be all there is. Thus it is easy to not know or deny what otherwise would be an uncomfortable truth to be looked at, challenging us to make changes we may not like although they would serve us very well.

162. Rather than follow men down the hardened path, girls and women have the opportunity to embark on the path of sacredness, and in that, show Men there is another way.

163. The growth in women playing contact sports is seriously not the direction we need to be heading, I would much rather be reading about its decline and also one day read that men have also come to their senses and have started treating contact sports as the abuse on the body that they actually are.

     1. Considering what you have highlighted here kevmchardy, it is clear that we are talking about women and girls starting to take part in an activity that is not that great for men and boys to start with. This is not an equality worth celebrating.

     2. Thank you, Kevin. Further in the wrong direction we are certainly travelling. It is inspiring and heartening to hear a man talk of the devastation of sport.

     3. Brilliantly said Kevin. I wonder how many thousands of years it will take for this to be headline news.

164. As role models for young girls we can show them how the power of being a true woman is our tenderness, gentleness and stillness not by outside force and competition, this way we support a harmony and equality of men and women by an acceptance that we each have qualities to offer that benefit our living way together.

165. When I was in the sixth form at school, we had to stay on Saturday afternoon to support the boys when they were playing Rugby. I actually found it too distressing in my body to watch because of how rough it was. How can it be that we allow our young children, boys and girls, to be encouraged to think that this kind of brutal sport is ok, let alone take part in it? Its a sad reflection of where we have got to in society and the lack of respect and honour that we have for the miraculousness of the human body.

166. A few years ago I was on my walk and a woman bounded up to me with a leaflet asking if I would be interested in women’s rugby. The look on my face was one of horror and I said an immediate ‘no’. She looked shocked and surprised and it was obvious she wasn’t used to getting this response. Why would women want to play rugby? It just doesn’t make sense.

167. ” …Girls are now raised and educated to compete with the boys, … to toughen up and harden their bodies in exactly the same way as boys are exhorted to do – to the absolute detriment of their own emerging femininity…” I have discovered through participating the modality of Esoteric Yoga sessions or programs that this has been one practical way to support a woman to develop the relationship with her feminine and innermost essence. From connecting with this, there is no need to compete or compare. It is test qualities seen in women that can then be role models for our younger generation.

168. And I just thought, surely there are doctors out there who would like to comment on how subjecting young boys and little girls to such wounding, brutal games would have a serious affect on the way the relatively unformed bodies will physically grow!

169. Because the beauty, joy, magnificence and Love of the Soul is ever more available on earth – like never before – there are forces out there that are resisting such powerful beauty and so have to introduce anything to delay our return to Soul – and girls in AFL is IT. Why can’t everyone see how crazy this is?

170. We really got something wrong when it comes to gender equality. How about equality would simply mean that we honour and cherish men and women equally for their true nature? Simple.

171. We need to learn to love ourselves, deeply. To nurture listen and respond to our body and what it is calling for. Only then can we pass on this foundation to future generations who can grow up with an innate sense if worth, value and love. It is these qualities that enrichen the world.

172. As is said of diplomacy to be war with peaceful means it can be said of sports that they are war claded as games pretending to further relationships of the clubs, towns, cities, counties, states, nations that compete with each other, but little actually truly connects anyone, much more is fostered the divide. That´s the nature of competition.

173. What you illustrate here clearly is that we are aiming for a false goal when it comes to gender equality and that we have surpassed the cruelty of ancient Rome when it comes to sport and entertainment.

174. When you observe women in hard sports, like body building and weight lifting, the female body morphs into the male form, with tenderness, grace and form being the first things that are shed and fragility has long since left the room.

175. It is so true that there is an emerging beauty in every girl as she enters in to womanhood. And whether this is met with the pressure to compete or to perform, the fact remains that this beauty is there and will always be there to be re-connected with.

176. I had a love hate relationship with sport in general – on the one hand it was like one big opportunity for me to feel stupid, uncoordinated and terrible, letting my team down, embarrassing myself etc and having to go hard to do it – but on the other hand it represented an opportunity if I was willing to turn myself into a different person, to prove myself as being good and tough and cool to everyone else.

177. The number of times I have heard that competition builds character, helps us grow and develop, that without it we would at best be mediocre….. Yet anyone who has been around people who are dedicated to living a Soul-led life, who deeply care about humanity and take their responsibility to the whole seriously, would have noticed that there is nothing mediocre about expressing the light of the Soul in daily life. And no need for competition, not even an ounce. There is a joyful constant growth and development, simply because that is what is required to serve the All.

178. Women are being targeted from every direction. If it isn’t from the high-fashioned end of town it is coming from the sport’s field. Women must come back to their deep and sacred beauty and bring the wealth of wisdom that is needed for the world to stay spinning until we have evolved back home to Soul.

179. Encouraging our girls and young women to engage in these firefly competitive sports which can be physically brutal, is it really wise or the answer to helping the epidemic of lack of self-worth amongst women? Is asking people to be something they are not helping them feel better at all? It doesn’t appear so – and the mainstream media, magazines and internet has it all pictured so that every reflection of beauty is trying to aspire to something that is beyond them – so perpetuating the cycle.

180. I loved sport growing up and played volleyball which saw me with 20 bruises on each leg due to throwing yourself on the floor to get the ball! ‘Commit to the ball’ would ring in my ears from my coach. If only we committed to our bodies in the same way !

     1. This is hilarious Vanessa! And of course tragic. ‘Commit to the ball’. Wow! And isn’t that how all of us have carried on our lives? ‘Commit to the tight schedule’. ‘Commit to killing yourself to alleviate your disease’, ‘Commit to trashing your self-esteem to protect yourself’. AS you say we have committed ourselves to everything but ourselves and our bodies.

181. What are We not Discussing? That all children are the most precious, tender, delicious, fragile beings and we can hold onto that gorgeous feeling as we grow. Then no-one would choose to play contact sport, it would be viewed as total abuse to the body and barbaric behaviour.

182. From my personal experience when women try to compete with men, they harden their bodies to do this and may not even be aware that this is in fact what happens. In the hardness their periods can change from very painful periods to no period at all. The reproductive system can shut down or show signs of dis-ease, with endometrioses becoming very common in younger and younger women. This is our bodies way of telling us that to harden our bodies in order to compete with men is putting a strain on it. So my question is why is it we feel we need to be like men and compete along side them at the expense of our bodies is it worth it? From my own personal experience of competing with men in the industry I work in the answer for me was no.

183. The counter argument and I have heard it strong is that it is great that women have the same opportunities as men. But what exactly are these opportunities, to go full time in playing a violent game that affects your health and buries your femininity, the very essence of that you were born. And it would be interesting to have a study of the side effects women and girls suffer from playing such violent pastimes. Currently it is considered sexist to say women shouldn’t play these sports, but look at the physical effects on men that play rugby, you can’t tell me women won’t suffer even more from competing in this violence. It’s madness encouraging a sport that would be physical assault were it not wrapped up in the dressing of a game.

184. I had an email from one of those keep connected to your old school mates and had a copy of the yearbook that was published at the end of the school year, that was a snap shot of the year in photos. The book may be a US kind of thing? I looked at the girl’s sports section; this was 1970, Gymnastics, swimming, track and field and tennis were the only sports they competed. Today in the US, there are female (US) football and ice hockey; high school teams! Women are leaving school and entering the world already hardened.

185. It is truly appalling to realise that the Education system has let this ‘opportunity’ for girls to play AFL through its system – introducing it, encouraging it, backing it, championing it as a ‘great thing’. And yet it is not so surprising considering all the other destructive thought paradigms that education system has embraced, such as the ‘right and wrong’ paradigm, the ‘fill-the-empty-vessel’ approach, the ‘trample on sensitivity’ approach etc. The same supremacy energy that runs AFL just automatically coalesces with the supremacy energy of education. What a lie to be smiling about and encouraging this act of devastation as if it were an innovation and growth for young girls.

186. Sports seems to be getting more and more elaborate and hyper as the years go on. The Glorification and Desirability to become famous or even represent your club, region or country is deeply ingrained in the whole process. Completely dishonouring of how there bodies feel and pushing it to the max, to be pushed and massaged back into shape it is a constant roller coaster. So we can be ‘equal’ – is that really what is going on, is this supporting equality? It very much looks like it is not, if not the opposite as we all loose respect for the ‘Super Woman’ trying to do it all, better than men. I have clocked the type of energy that I have been in when trying to fit into this and it is deeply masculine and so not allowing any of my delicate, sweet and precious qualities that I now have come to adore and cherish.

187. It is a sorry state of affairs that we have got to this point thinking women playing rugby or any contact sport for that matter is ok, but this is only a reflection of where we as women are predominantly operating from.

188. The competition for girls and boys to be equally tough as children builds the competition to be equal in the workplace later in life. It is quite sad we need to go through this phase to loose ourselves so deeply before we return to knowing that girls can bring a different reflection to boys as women can to men, but our tenderness is genderless

189. This is Quite shocking but a further outplay in the way we are going with our bodies in the world . It is something to really shine a light on and be aware of where our sensitivity and tenderness is being crushed fro m the very beginning of our lives in a further out play to numb and distract us completely from the truth of who we really are and the love we innately are .We deserve to be treasured and nurtured and held from children and as otherwise as we see the hardness and toughening up of sports is passed on and magnified as our generations pass by.

190. The so called normal for women is to become more like a man, and hence this is reflected in the sporting arenas today (AFL for women, weight lifting for women, Iron Man for women etc etc), but one can also see this in the corporate world with women becoming hard core business entrepreneurs and even with clothes too (have you noticed when we walk into clothes shops and it takes a little while to work out which side is the men’s side and which side is the women’s side!?)… This should be stopping us in our tracks, as there is so much to appreciate in qualities on both sides (men and women) and yet we seem to be forgetting the qualities that women bring whilst we try to copy the men. Are we losing ourselves as women, is a great question, but even greater is to ask what qualities do we have that we could be celebrating instead.

191. This is really quite an image Colleen: ‘Do we really want to raise our girls to become urban ‘GI Janes,’ ever ready for any type of combative action, bullet belt draped around their hips replete not with bullets, but with ‘I can do anything’ tampons?’ You would probably earn enough money to retire on if you sold the idea to a tampon corporation! As if you would want to retire though!

192. So many great points you raise here Anonymous, I agree that this new sport for young girls feels like a step backwards, not forwards for all the reasons you present. That it is a hardening of a young girls body at an age where they are still growing, still learning what it means to be in a girls body. This is a time that we need to be fostering self care, nurturing and honouring, but this is taking girls away from that, definitely not fostering it.

193. “Inherent within the girl is the woman that is to be with all of her tenderness, stillness, sacredness and joy.” Absolutely Anon, and this should be fostered and supported to be expressed from a very young age, so that no young girl or woman in her sacredness would ever dream of subjecting her body to such trauma through sport or anything else harsh for that matter.

194. The viciousness of the competition and pack energy that enters the body in sporting teams is the complete opposite of the harmony that the body naturally works in, and is massively detrimental to our health and well being.

195. I just love the title of this blog. We are not discussing the condoning of brutality to the female form. Already we have accepted this treatment towards men but now we are including women and making it not just acceptable and sell-able to girls as young as 6 but aspirational even. And all under the umbrella of sport which seems to be a term that gives respectability to all kinds of brutality in the name of entertainment and attainment. Call something a sport legitimises physical abuse to a body.

     1. Well said Karin. “Call something a sport legitimises physical abuse to a body”, and calling something a sport also legitimises cruelty to animals.

196. Equality between men and women is not about being able to do the same thing, but about being equally valued and understood for the quality of who we are within.

     1. Well said Heather. in the first instance it becomes about recognition and acceptance, fitting in and being one of the boys. Having something to talk about with men even. There is no acknowledgment that we all have these delicate, sensitive and tender natures that can be cherished and supported to bloom.

197. When you start to feel the beauty within doing things that toughen the body become much less appealing.

198. I recently spent time with an eight year old girl I hadn’t seen for a while and got a huge shock when she told me she was playing AFL. There is nothing “gender equality” about it. It hurts to put your body through that and women and girls don’t have bodies made for that kind of toughness (I personally don’t think men do either, but that is a different topic).

199. As a woman who is only just coming to feel herself as being a true woman, I recognise that the majority of women in the world have also lost their connection to their true feminine nature, in the same way that men have also lost their connection to their original tender selves. The problem is huge, as once that connection is lost then it means that we can be easily manipulated by energy that is constantly seeking to lead us astray and as a result we end up living in ways that are so far from the truth, we end up as unrecognisable.

200. I used to have to play lacrosse at school, I dreaded it, it was fast paced and the ball was so hard and if it hit you boy it hurt. Thankfully I wasn’t very good at it so was always one of the last to get picked for teams, if at all. I can’t imagine what it must be like for girls to train for and play rugby. I wonder if they are ever asked how they really feel about it taking away expectations and wanting to please..

201. In a time where it is becoming more clear of the negative impact of contact sports on our bodies it is sad we have now added women to the AFL mix.

202. I have noticed from a young age at sports days children are trained to and encouraged to compete with one another…parents are screaming, the children force their bodies to push, go faster, win and get so emotional if they win or lose? What is the point of it? I do not see how this supports anyone, their bodies, relationships etc are not benefited by competition. There is not enough collaboration and unity role modelled in schools, doing better than others is the main idea that is propagated in all areas. Everyone can exercise, training, learn and be educated without trying to be better than someone else. It embeds a competitive and separatist idea of life that continues into adulthood, and we can see the harm that that is causing across the planet.

203. Completely and this would be the case for boys/men as well. No one really enjoys the aggression yet I know as was the case for myself when I had to play rugby at school I would force myself to harden up to get through it and do my best to run as fast possible to avoid contact! Then I would find any and every excuse to skip games lessons when it came to rugby!

204. Our bodies are amazing and very adaptable. There is a reason why we have evolved to what is our standard model today. Could it be said that Men and Women have reached homeostasis through evolution? So, what is the purpose of full contact sport with women or men?

205. New Zealand is also a country that encourages -nay, glorifies -contact sport, including for women. We have a national womens rugby team and the play includes tackling, one of the statistically most brutal things to do in sport. Most people I speak to about it do not understand how harmful this is to women -all women, not just those who play rugby, as it perpetuates the ‘pioneer women’ mentality we have here, which asks women to be as tough as the men -tougher even.

206. Probably someone has already said this, but it seems that, in the first place, tender young boys should not be subjected to such brutal physical competitive sport – they are recruited from about 4 years old upwards. That we have allowed this to happen to our equally sensitive boys is the first big hole that we have in the integrity of our society.

     1. The second big hole is the we, as kids go through with it even though we know it’s not right for us.

207. What we are not discussing is that most, sports are harmful to our body, men and women, and why is it that we need these types of distractions, what are we avoiding?

208. It just goes to show how threatening a woman in her sacredness is to the structure of our society as it stands today. It seems to be safer to harden women to be like men than to encourage a deep connection to the joyful stillness that can be found within. A connection that brings to the woman the steady knowing of her rightful place in the world. This is threatening as it will change to face of this competing, warring, dog eat dog world that consumerism today thrives on, for where a woman goes the man cannot help but follow.

209. It’s crazy how young we start to channel those who show potential into competitive sport – what real choice do they have at this stage?

210. Funny (not) to read this because I just read in the papers yesterday about the huge increase in men taking out Apprehended Violence Orders (AVOs) due to the man being a victim of abuse and in many cases domestic violence. Becoming competitive, harder and tougher is not evolutionary for men or women.

211. What better way to quiet the enormous power of the ageless sacredness that is naturally held by women than to encourage hardness, aggression and compettion.

212. To hear that the number of women who are participating in AFL has risen by 140% in the last three years, is shocking. This ought to be raising alarm bells in our schools, our homes, everywhere. It is not rocket science to consider how a woman’s body is designed and how everything in an aggressive sport like AFL is completely contra, a perverse anathema, to the woman and young girl’s tender physique. It is an indictment on where we are at as a society and how the denigration of women – by women themselves – is still very much the name of the real game that’s taking place.

213. Women in their sacredness is what will lead humanity out of this quagmire – and so we put them on the rugby pitch, in a boxing ring or fighting naked in a cage and then we call ourselves intelligent.

     1. One of the questions to consider on a world scale is where does our intelligence come from when these are the choices we are making? A published list of harming choices would be worth pasting across ever media platform on the same day. It would be interesting to observe if overall there would actually be a ripple effect of at least gentleness that day across the world as people realize the enormity of the harm that is occurring every second, and our part in it by either denial or even contribution to this harm.

214. Knowing what a struggle it is for women to attune to their stillness and sacredness as a normal way of being, it is so sad that an almost deliberate attempt is being made to prevent that happening.

215. The idea of girls playing rugby makes no sense to me as it pays no heed to the physical delicacy and fragility of the female form. To move in a way that brings this activity into being is to move in the opposite of natures intention.

216. These words really hit home, that “we seem to be currently intent upon bludgeoning such qualities out of existence.” The work of Esoteric Women’s Health really is needed in the world, to arrest the current momentum of denaturing women and girls from their true qualities of sacredness and delicacy.

     1. Yes the work of Esoteric Women’s Health is paramount in bringing back the innate qualities we know resonant inside but are so often not honoured or celebrated in the media.

        1. Esoteric Women’s Health really supported me in breaking down the hardness in my body, which supported the healing of my period issues, endometriosis and ovaries.

217. This is shocking that the WNRL is offering a career pathway in rugby for girls from the age of 6.

     1. I have known quite a few men who have been rugby players and coaches and physically their body has become so hard, I cannot imagine how a young girls body would look, as they start to harden up. This is shocking that young girls are being offered such a career. Little do they know the impact on their bodies and the long term effects. I am sure WNRL are not sharing that truth.

        1. Yes Amita, there is no connection made with the impact of these hard contact sports, even though there’s no denying how detrimental it is even for men’s bodies. At purely a physical level the number of injuries sustained ought to be enough to propose that it is entirely inappropriate to put women’s bodies into that sort of trauma.

218. Who can be to blame for this behaviour of girls being so tough? Mothers who have not nurtured them with enough love? Fathers who want to toughen them up for a hard life? Children who are following the pushing and forceful trend? There is no blame on anyone at all, but we have the responsibility to show a different reflection when we know there is a different way to be.

219. Is the world becoming uni-sex and the view of who we are is a blurred line in the sand? Toilets, sports, CEOs and the list of what makes us different vanishes. Cancer doesn’t care about gender nor does stress; now they just have more different parts to effect. Why would women wish to submit their body’s to a full contact sport? We need to express to women their greatest strength is their femininity and fragility; it is what they bring!

     1. I agree Steve, women has lost the understanding that their true power comes from their sacredness and feminity. If they stuck with it rather than caving into competiting with men then the world would really start to change. Currently effectively men are pretty much allowed to get away with anything and women do not say no to it. Sure women at times complain but if we 1st do ot treat ourselves with the love, care and repect we deserve then how can we expect anyone else to?

     2. I would go one step further and say why would men wish to submit their body to a full contact sport as well .. it is not in their true nature to do this. It is a form of abuse.

220. Stunning Anonymous the spotlight you shine is one that is badly needed within our school and sporting arenas. As a health practitioner of many years, the bodies of women who have engaged in hard contact sports especially are some of the most compromised I ever see. Not only do they often have significant issues with periods, endometriosis but infertility is a big issue that results from this shut down and denial of the true qualities held naturally within. We have yet to recognise the bludgeoning of the body that occurs in heavy exercise and sports and how detrimental it is for both sexes… we are just not designed for it, however readily we can make the body do what is required.

     1. Fascinating to hear the loss of fertility. I’m no doctor, but can there be a more obvious signal of a woman denying her femininity??

        1. Yes agree Otto, what’s also fascinating is our inability to make the connection when we’re immersed in the pursuit of sport. As a sporting person for many years also I can say there is no connection made between these sort of physical signs and the activity we are pushing the body into. Being super fit and sporty is considered a very healthy lifestyle choice…

        2. And this blinds us. But take a look at professional sportsmen and women – all the time we hear about their bodies breaking down and we are not even privy to the copious amount of doctoring, drugging and other activities that got on behind closed doors to try to prop these bodies up. Is this really what we are aspiring to??

        3. Totally Otto. The truth about how sports affect the body detrimentally are often kept hidden. When I was young I shared a house with a ballerina and I was shocked to find out how painful it was on the body. All the young ballerinas were already, at this stage in their career drinking copious amounts of scotch at the end of the day, and it was common practice after a while to have steroid injections in the knees to be able to even go on stage. The body was being savaged in order to present the glossy picture that appeared on stage.

        4. Oh Lyndy – don’t get me started on ballet!! And whilst all of this goes on behind these scenes, we pay crazy, crazy money to sit in the theatres and opera houses to watch, applaud and praise this abuse. It’s worse than what went on in Colisseum – at least there, there was no pretence – that is the true evil of all of this – the illusion that we all so willingly feed.

     2. Wow Jane, that’s extreme but yes, I know not unusual. I was similar although didn’t push through such exhaustion to keep going. I did have really painful periods each month though, enough to spend a day in bed each month on pain-killers… but never once considered that it might be because of all the sport I played each day. I didn’t connect the dots that when I went to college I stopped a lot of it, and from that point my periods improved.

     3. I too agree Jennifer. I did long distance cycling for many years which was likely to have caused my blocked tubes so i couldn’t have children.

     4. I also had very painful periods as a teenager. I played a lot of sport too and rode horses – again there was no connection made between these activities and the pain I experienced each month. It is so important that we start to recognise what we are doing to our health when we engage in activities that are contra to the essence we hold. Important also that we don’t throw the baby out with the bath water because exercising the body is super important – it just has to be done in a way that honours the body, not in disregard of it.

     5. Hard contact sports effects a women just like a women who is driven to succeed, hardening her body to prove she can just be as competitive in an office environment. I had become so driven in my career and I had hardened my body, later to fined out I had issues with periods, endometriosis and infertility.

        1. Yes absolutely true Amita, sport is definitely not the only way we harden and push the body to a point of infertility, endometriosis etc. It’s a great example though as in particular it is hailed as a ‘healthy’ pursuit.

     6. We are all so desperate not to appear fragile and yet fragility is such a deeply beautiful quality.

        1. It’s fascinating how we as a society have come to equate fragility with weakness and being a bit pathetic, when it’s at the core of our being and a very human quality – one to be cherished rather than crushed.

     7. I too loved playing sport as a teenager Jane – flying around the hockey field came as close as I knew to the sensation of ‘flying’, except for high diving. Additionally, playing sport was also a way of becoming a ‘star’ at school. And although I had nothing on my radar about being a star, I found that when I accidentally received the honour of ‘Juvenile Athletics champion’ when I came to high school I loved being a sports star! But after a day of running in many races, high jumping and long jumping etc. I would be in bed the next day having to recover from the exertion. I thought that there was something drastically wrong with me but it was my body saying ‘Don’t do this’.

221. It helps to see the bigger picture in the promotion of contact and other sports for women as specifically designed to colonise a new and under-exploited market segment. Women, without awareness, willing become pawns in this manipulative and evil business game.

222. People watching AFL and getting off on the absolute abuse of the male players that occur on the field is quite sickening as it is and now more horrifying is that they will get off on watching girls abuse themselves and each other on the field. I do not see it differently to crowds watching the gladiator fights. As a human race we have not evolved. If we stop asking to watch this sort of brutal sport then there will be no need for the players to pursue such a harmful game.

223. What I find interesting is that the sport is offered during lunchtime – a time that offers space for oneself or to socialise in the busyness and intensity of school and learning.

224. Two aspects of this stand out for me – one the question of why young girls are saying yes to these activities, as there must be a demand for it if it’s being offered and secondly, it feels like a marketing ploy, to cover more sports, sponsors and audience by getting women involved. But still, what is in it for the women? Attention, recognition and/or contact with others? There’s a lot to unpack here.

225. Just in the title alone, does it bring to question, the awkwardness and conflict between the words ‘girls’ and ‘contact sport’. They simply conflict each other, and I suppose in that reveals the conflict that occurs in a girl’s / woman’s body that has to harden and toughen up in order to play such tough contact sports.

226. I agree. There is definitely a set up that makes these sports attractive.

227. At what cost to our physical, emotional and precious bodies when we have to get our entertainment by watching or playing sports that bludgeon the body and why is there an increasing demand for girls to get involved with these sports, that have already been proven over and over again of the harm they cause to the body? What are we wanting for our young girls when they applauded and encouraged to be included in these team sports? We have already placed this demand for these contact sports on our young boys/men and now here we choose to even further this by applauding and encouraging young girls to participate in these activities under the false perception that this proves we are equal to men. We are all tender, precious and gentle by our very nature and we are going against – disregarding the very fabric of our essence when we allow this type of competitive and separative behaviour. We are all included in this, for without the demand, there can be no call for the feminine gender to be included/encouraged to go into these fields of sport. And lets not forget the huge financial gain that some will profit from these activities and is it possible that that could that be the underlying motive for their promotion?

228. I don’t know why women would want to emulate men in such a violent way ! Just watching the end result of damage incurred through this game, broken bones from noses to legs and arms and more internal damage such as concussion. is surely a crazy way to gain notoriety. What effect it will have on women’s precious reproductive and child nurturing parts we will find out in the future!

229. The true evil is pretending that this new move to destroy women (and men) is all part of gender equality and the growth and progress this implies. It is in fact a retrograde move, a hyped competition that is keeping women apart from women, women apart from men, and men apart from men. It is all a plan of divide and conquer.

230. The biggest game the world is denying our true femininity. Thinking that it’s a thing reserved for women, rather than a quality, an energy, keeps us all deeply trapped in a rat race mentality where scoring a goal trumps moving with Grace. But thanks to those like you Anonymous who choose to question what is true, there’s an opportunity decide to leave this brutal field of play.

231. Did we come to the point where gender equality is about toughing up because men have constantly undermined women through the ages and looked to dominate them. And still do as we witness in the pay gaps and male dominated societies. But this is not solved by women playing brutal sports, and knocking each other about senseless. It will change when women value their own qualities which are deeply nurturing and inspiring for men.

232. All sport is war. Are we as a society preparing our young, both male and female for war? Is that what we want . . . war? It all starts with the war on the physical body. The injuries sustained from football and other sports are well documented.

     1. So true Kathleen – instead of standing side-by-side we are training and demanding our children to stand head-to-head. This is learnt and not a natural way of being with each other at all.

        1. Well said Rachel. We are indeed demanding our children to out smart the next person when we present any form of competition. This is a very head to head stance as you say. You could go as far as saying we are encouraging head butting. Not very becoming for either gender at any age.

233. I have never been one for any sort of harshness in sport, contact, or even competition. While I knew it simply wasn’t a natural thing for me and there was no interest to participate, there was nothing reflected around me to confirm that this is a true honouring of the preciousness of being a women. These days I’m very appreciative of the reflection that is available through Universal Medicine, Natalie Benhayon and many other women who choose to live in a way that honours the loveliness of who we innately are in our essence and no requirement to toughen up in any way. Basic stuff that I did take on that I needed to be able to do e.g. lifting heavy things, is not something we should be able to do if we simply aren’t built for it.

234. Being a nurse I have seen many young women in their teens sustain horrific injuries to their legs; broken ankles, knee displacements, tears to achilles etc which have resulted in ongoing chronic pain into their late 20’s and in all likelihood cannot help but continue on from there. I have seen a young woman who, whilst playing sport internationally, discovered she was pregnant only when she was delivering the baby, such was the hardening in her body.

     1. Wow that’s incredible Jeanette, l’ve heard of it before in overweight women who didn’t know they were pregnant, but not a sporting woman. Given all the bodily changes that occur with increased female hormones during that time it is testimony to the degree of hardening (and therefore desensitising) that has taken place.

235. It feels a very sad and backward step Colleen, that girls are participating in these rough contact sports for the sake of wanting to be treated equally. To do this, girls are turning away from their natural delicate state to put on a shield and be tough and hard. As women, we can learn to have power and strength with a delicacy, without it coming from a physical hardness.

236. I remember absolutely hating hockey at school. It was so rough. It involved standing in a freezing cold field in a short skirt running around with a heavy stick hitting a heavy ball and wrestling with girls who were usually of a heavy build. With my slight frame I used to go flying if someone so much as knocked me. Once I was hit in the mouth with someone else’s hockey stick. Ouch! I couldn’t understand why anyone could enjoy it. It encouraged fierce competition and a violent nature. I knew it was definitely not for me.

     1. Same here Rebecca, hockey was too rough, and I did not see the point. Not one ounce of me enjoyed it, but unfortunately we did not have a choice, and like you, often girls would be hurt.

237. To play contact sports we need to dumb down and deny our sensitivity. No one who is feeling how exquisitely tender they are could hurl themselves at another – its impossible. I know for me it was the contact part of sport I never enjoyed so learnt to run as fast as possible and dodge tackles!!

238. There seems to be formula here that I have seen in many other social situations:

     1- favour a group of people for whatever reason, and by default discriminate against the others
     2- tell those you are discriminating against that they are not allowed to partake in something the favoured people are able to do – however abhorrent that thing might be
     3- lift the barrier allowing everyone the ‘right’ to take part
     4- those suffering the discrimination (even if they would have normally seen the abhorrent angle) will now see this token as a sign that they have arrived somewhere.

     In reality nothing has changed other than the second group are now voluntarily taking part in an activity that they would not otherwise.

     1. I like your observation here Golnaz, so it shows that we are actually fighting/striving for things that we actually do not want but because they are packaged in the right way we do not see what we are buying into and go for it.

239. Well this really is another cherry on the top of the already lie, that women can only be equal to men by matching them (or beating them) at their own game. When we are able to nurturingly build a curriculum for our girls and boys that nourish and support their true, natural expression, rather than a harsh, physical competition, will we see a true, lasting and deepening equality.

240. This is a great blog bringing to light a big fault in our view of equality.. the false notion that it is for everyone to harden up, both boy and girl, man and woman, there definitely is a need for an open discussion founded on the true nature of man and women.

241. I was going through a paper the other day and saw exactly this, women playing rugby and the bodies that I saw looked liked men, they were going in for a hard tackle and they literally had lost any connection to the tender, sweet and delicate women that they are. Reading this article I had no idea that girls of 6 years of age are training and getting involved. This is very concerning.

242. Women have been trying to make themselves equal to men for a long time now by almost being men, doing the same activities, getting the same rights and qualifications and pushing their female bodies to match that of a mans body. But this is not true equality and this paragraph below is highlighting that this way/consciousness is now filtering into our young girls and their tender bodies even earlier to perhaps last lifetimes.
     ‘Girls are now raised and educated to compete with the boys, and in this are laying down a foundation for a possible lifetime of competing with men on the terms dictated by a society that drives girls to toughen up and harden their bodies in exactly the same way as boys are exhorted to do – to the absolute detriment of their own emerging femininity.’

243. Even when we ‘toughen ourselves’ we know and can sense just how sweet we are underneath all that.

244. Hardening our bodies numbs us from registering all the seemingly small choices we make that do not honour ourselves and our sensitivity. Without a women developing a foundation of nurturing and self care, how can she then be expected to care for others?

245. Observing the level of aggression girls have accepted as normal in their expression is a very worrying trend. I have observed a number of girls, not knowing how to connect with the boys in the classroom, actually, thump them in normal conversation. The way many girls also talk to each other is very aggressive too but is simply dismissed as a joke or playfulness.

246. Perhaps we need more role models of true femaleness to be seen by more young girls. Sadly the media supports the hard image and the celebrity status, so true women are not feted as role models, but perhaps we can help by connecting with our own inner stillness and walking everywhere reflecting those feminine qualities we would like our young girls to feel inside themselves.

247. The agenda is really saturation and numbers when it comes to the roll out of sport – it matters not if they are women or men to such leagues. An interesting point is herein offered, of whether we stop and consider the effect of competition and sport on both men and women – for it affects us all equally.

248. There is big, big money in sport today so it is perhaps no wonder the various sporting associations are chasing the other half of the population to become the next ‘flavour’ of combat on offer. I feel too, reading an earlier comment about women in American football being half-dressed, there is an element of a ‘mud-wrestling-women’ type of voyeurism at play here too. What an arena to send our girls into.

249. I have watched over the years the changes in children as sport becomes a bigger and bigger part of their lives. It is like their eyes glaze over and they hide who they are to continue in the sport. Whilst to most their dedication and commitment is revered, I do wonder what the motivation is behind stepping away from themselves to continue to compete.

250. The insidiousness behind creating such competition in the women’s arena is that as much as it is supposedly driven by equality between genders, I sense that more so it is driven by the financial gain it could bring to the sporting identities involved. We really do need to discern everything that is at play and watch with interest how lost we have become to the true qualities a woman holds as such sporting competitions become the unfortunate normal.

251. Why is it that in a world racked by war, suffering, domestic abuse, slavery, corruption etc, we continue to champion hardness, toughness, competition and aggression? How do we see these traits being the answer to the worlds suffering? Why do we not consider fostering sensitivity, feeling, expression, nurturing, collaboration and understanding in everyone regardless of gender?

252. That which is being ‘glorified’ in sport and these training regimes for young girls is far from the natural inner beauty, sacredness and harmony that they are in truth. An ill-recipe for more illness and dis-ease in the future is what is being set up here.

253. “Do we want to raise our girls to be the sensitive self-nurturing gorgeous women they all are on the inside?” Apparently not, if the proliferation of contact sports in the world today continues. To toughen up and become hard as women seems to be where it’s at and has been for a while. Women having to out-male men to get promotions etc. And then we wonder why there are so many issues with our periods and fertility problems. There is a disconnect here I feel.

254. Contact sports are just another way of waging war.

255. Gosh, how disconnected are we from our sensitivity to imagine in our wildest dreams that contact sport is suitable for a six year old girl (or boy)!?

256. It is curious that as a race we seem to so champion being male and ‘maleness’. Everything around us in nature and in the Universe reflects balance and harmony – so surely we are equally here to harmonise the maleness and the femaleness too. Take a look at the state of the world. Extremes of maleness are not the answer, that is clear.

257. I love your call to have a community conversation about this; regardless of the topic, talking openly with different friends and families about something can be an amazing opportunity to hear different perspectives!

     1. This is what is so insane. I have a very strong feeling that behind the closed doors of many, many families, there are parents and children who are all feeling this. But the social norms are so over-powering that people are afraid to stick their heads above the parapet. I can really appreciate this and so community conversations can really support people in breaking down the walls of the societal fortress.

258. How far we are from the truth of equality if it takes us to force our body and shut down to our innate qualities to be equal in gender, and from such a young age. True equality is our essence, our divine qualities within, men and women, that when we nurture and care for ourselves we connect and feel the equality we already are.. with everyone.. no need for competing.

259. I was always a disappointment to my father being the only male child with two sisters, and I did not like sports. This non-acceptance of these activities has continued to this day. The effort to win and have that fleeting moment of victory that can never be maintained never made sense to me? Women have for years sacrificed themselves to compete in the world to be like men and lose themselves, are now; boxing, kick boxing, rugby and how long before ‘the worlds strongest women’ competitions are a reality? I know a lot of powerful and strong women that are fragile, delicate and loving that do not need to play games for they win every day by being themselves.

260. The start of your blog captured the peer pressure that is so rife in schools and how hard it must be to go against that and say I don’t want to participate. In our increasingly competitive educational environment girls and boys are sorely in need of positive role models that do not promote constantly competing against each other in every arena including sports at great expense to their bodies and their natural tenderness.

261. “Or do we want to raise our girls to be the sensitive, self-nurturing, gorgeous women they all are on the inside?” Having myself lived most of my life attempting to ‘keep up with the lads’ and suffering badly as a consequence, learning to appreciate, cherish and express myself as the fragile beautiful woman I am has brought about the most enormous shift in the quality of my health, let alone my expression. This experience alone teaches me absolutely that gender equality is not about doing the same things, it’s about expressing the qualities that innately lie within the man and the women and when we come to realise that these are both extremely tender and precious, then we will have true equality.

262. I loved competitive sport but what I loved most about it was the adrenaline rush together with the ability to physically act on that adrenaline rush, unlike emotions which could trigger a lot of adrenaline but there was nowhere to go with that excessive energy.

263. I know when I used to play competitive contact sports at school and beyond, I used to have to harden my mind and my body to be able to get through – such is the intensity involved. It left a permanent ‘mark’ on me that took many years to undo. However I did not really question it much because it was so encouraged and considered normal and a healthy thing to do, so it is great to open up this discussion to consider whether it is actually natural for us to engage in these activities and what kind of human being are we saying yes to when we allow and encourage our youth to participate in these sports.

264. Allowing myself to connect to and feel my own qualities of delicacy, femininity, stillness and joy has been such an incredible unfolding but what is devastating is how long I have kept all this exquisiteness hidden away.

265. I was quite taken aback when I found out that the school my daughter goes to teaches mixed touch Rugby from age 7 upwards, what happened to walking up and down the gym all with a bean bag on your head which teaches stability, steadiness, posture and is a giggle to do.

266. I have been so profoundly and deeply inspired by some incredible women in my life. Divine, scared expressions of absolute femininity – as powerful, strong and leading as any man I have ever met – but with a unique flavour and reflection that has allowed me to access my own innate fragility, tenderness and sacredness. Without these women, being women, absolute women, I wouldn’t be a tenth of the man that I am now. True women are super powerful, amazing and exactly what the world so desperately needs.

267. As a man I have done sports ts too when I was young and I liked it because it gave me reward in some way. But what I also remember is the fact that my body was always hurting, sore feet from the uncomfortable football shoes, bruises or abrasion from encounters or slides and crush injuries. Later on when I went into swimming and waterpolo this continued. It was the winning that was celebrated but my body had to suffer from the abuse that I had to let it undergo to fulfill those needs. Now I would say, boys do not step into this same abuse as I have done in the past as it actually has not brought anything more than physical and mental hurt to my being, and indeed, why should we ask girls to do the same to them equally as they have the right to honour the delicateness of their bodies and being in the first place.

268. I was fallen for being a better man for most of my life as I learned that from my mum. I was proud that my mum raised me like that almost most of my life because it was my believe that this was the best preparation for my life until I re-learned that I am also feminine and that I have a female body! To be a women does not mean that I am not able to work hard – it only means that I am not exclude my sensitivity my delicateness and my fragility as that is what a woman´s body is naturally -fact! So how many women does learn or forget about this fact like I did? And does this perhaps have an effect on our illness and disease rate???

269. Any support that keeps us separated from each other or saying that one is more or less than another, is far from our natural way of being and we all know this from deep inside no matter how young or old we are.

270. Great article Anonymous, sacrificing the body in the name of sport is not only considered ‘normal’ but also considered ‘healthy’ when compared to sitting around glue to a screen. Where has going for a walk or throwing a ball around for fun gone? I just looked up the lingerie football the young women compete in in the USA. Really is this equality? The extent we will go to and the damage we are prepare to do to the human body in order to get a little identification is astounding!

     1. When we have to name it equality we also have to give the following qualification with it. It is equality in not living to the true nature of our being and in abusing our bodies and being. The communication would then be transparent and reveal to us directly what these plans are intended for to bring to us in the first place.

271. As long as we are feeling the need to prove ourselves, we are disconnected from the truth that we are already everything we need to be, we are dismissing how incredibly amazing we already are. Therefore, it doesn’t matter what we strive to ‘achieve’ to prove our worthiness, it will never be enough. What will bring settlement is the acceptance of who we truly are and all that we have to offer. This is how we inspire our young girls and boys, by reinforcing this truth.

272. “The establishment of a national women’s league will provide a platform to inspire young girls to reach for the stars and provide another avenue for Australian Rules fans to enjoy” – we are all already exquisitely divine stars, but over time, we’ve lost our way and forgotten how to twinkle. There is nothing inspiring about establishing a platform which sees young women disconnect from their precious bodies and numb themselves to such an extent that they can’t feel who they truly are. It feels more like an opportunity to develop another stream of revenue for the AFL at the expense of our tender young women.

273. Hardening of our body in any way is abuse. To participate in sports requires us to harden our body. So, to me sports is a form of abuse to our body.

274. I find it shocking to read that girls as young as 6 are accepted for the women’s rugby teams. My heart sinks in hearing this as I know the impact of such sports on a woman’s body and the amount of work to undo the damage that ensues. I have had a background with lots of sports since a young age, including competetive tennis, running, yoga, and martial arts…and I feel I am still undoing the damage from these sports. We don’t always stop to feel and realise that the choices we make can have long lasting impacts on ourselves and others, and so you would hope that these impacts would be positive rather than negative…however, in the case of rugby leagues for women, I personally don’t see the benefits on any level for anyone.

275. It occurs to me that girls have so few role models today, someone like Audrey Hepburn exuded confidence, her delicate femininity & grace was playful and inspiring. Today we are sold beauty void of these natural qualities that make a woman so divine and powerful.

     1. I agree Lucinda, when I look at photographs of my mother and her friends when they were younger they had a natural grace and beauty that shone through in the photographs, the looked well and healthy. When I look at images now of young women, my heart t sinks as I feel their hardness and how much they are ‘trying’ to look perfect all the while taking away from their natural beauty.

     2. Yes, current female role models like the Kardashians are quite different.

276. When I was young I didn’t want to be sensitive or fragile so I tried to bludgeon any delicateness out of myself and was so hardened that I even refused to allow myself to cry or be needy in any way. I was super competitive and angry. Life was not fun and I would have belittled even the concept of joy. I see so many young women and men disconnected from the sensitive people they are and can only see these sorts of contact sports would have great appeal, especially to those who believe they have to be tough to survive. There is no doubt the kudos and ‘team spirit’ of playing in such teams would be greatly attractive.

     Thankfully I have felt how amazing it is to have felt how powerful my sensitivity is and seen through the illusion of what these sports proffer. It’s wonderful to read all the comments here as they offer a point of reference of another way of being in the world that is powerful, loving, truthful and harmonious.

277. As mentioned in my earlier comment, as women we can make the choice to turn away from our innate sensitivity and choose the hardness and protection. Sadly, I can put my hand up for having been a part of this too – growing up I was disapointed in being a girl, and wanted to be a boy instead (boys seemed to have so much more fun!)…and so I chose to be a tom boy growing up, wearing sneakers and shorts everywhere and carrying a pocket knife around in case I was called to adventure at any point! I got into sports at an early age and felt this was my way of protecting myself from the hardness of the world, and in this I got lots of approval from all those around me that I was doing the ‘right’ thing. Yet a part of me yearned to try makeup, to dress up as a princess etc, but I dared not as I knew that that would be scoffed at and not seen as acceptable. So already as a little girl I sensed all this around me and made choices to already reject the very sensitivity and vulnerability and beauty that was within. Thankfully, it is never too late to ditch the hardness, and over the past 10 years or so, having discovered Universal Medicine and the teachings of Serge Benhayon, I have learned to re-connect to the woman within, and allow this to blossom and not see it as a liability but as the precious strength that it is, knowing too that in all I do and in all I am, I am also a role model for other girls and women, should they choose to express what lies within.

278. It seems in our world there is no space for the true woman, the sensitive and nurturing woman, for it is scoffed at, seen as weak and pathetic and something that is a liability. The sad truth of the matter is that our world does seek to harden and so called transform the beauty of delicateness that each woman hold within, into a rock hard case that appears strong and powerful by societie’s current standards. However, the reality is that what we turn away from as women IS our true strength, but not until we choose to see them as such. Thank you Anon for opening up the well needed conversation.

279. It’s interesting how we think girls have to step up to the mark with boys activities in order to gain gender equality, rather than the other way around. May be we could set a new trend whereby boys are encouraged to join in very female orientated activities, so that instead of becoming hard, desensitised and beating up their bodies, each gender could re-re-discover the power of their inner delicacy and celebrate this naturally innate equality that resides in all us.

280. Not only do we mercilessly bombard young girls with images of how they should look like (skinny, sulky, miserable, wounded, photoshopped, wanton) but now they are being trained tone gladiators! Gladiator training has been full-on enough with hockey and netball but AFL really takes the cake. Somebody wants women out of their power really badly!

281. Thank you Anonymous, this is an indication of the current fight for equality we have between men and women, where women seem to be fighting and getting on top of what normally has been associated with men – we can see it in the workplace and now sports. The sad truth is the division between genders this creates as who is better than the other and the ill consequences on the women’s bodies as can be seen by escalating and horrific figures of illness and disease, it is only through the valuing and appreciation of our unique qualities that we can break through this hideous illusion of competition in sports and once again claim our true nature of who we truly are.

282. Fascinating topic for discussion, indeed everyone is eager to get behind the gender equality agenda, yet no one seems to be on the other side asking at what cost and to what purpose does the motivation of these two highly emotive words really support humanity.

     1. Gender equality – equal to what?? Both sexes in total denial and burial of the divine specificity of what each offers to each other and to the world.

283. It’s true; by encouraging and raising young women to be tough, brutal and gladiator-like, is our aim to then have a society of ALL men? Is this equality, or is this actually the most disrespectful thing to do for women worldwide, increasing the equality gap by corrupting women’s bodies?

     1. But there is more to this insanity in that your description of what we are encouraging women to become is ALSO exactly what we shouldn’t be encouraging our men to be. So we are massively wide of the mark in both sexes.

        1. What you share Otto is so true… we are massively wide of the mark in both sexes. As a teacher I see them same gentle tendencies in boys and in girls, but through social norm boys are not encouraged to express it. Just looking at the body language of the 8, 9 and 10 year olds who are learning to play rugby for the 1st time says it all. Often in high anxiety and nervousness boys cover up their tenderness by going into harness to fit in and get on with it… and we are asking our girls to do the same?

284. When are we going to see sense, and move away from all this contact sport into something a lot more gentle, they didn’t have female gladiators way back when they were supposed to be less civilised, so why are we creating them now?

     1. It’s a great point Kevin. What civilised society would be arrogant and ignorant enough to be destroying the very essence that will guide us back to our truth? Seemingly that would be us.

285. Thank you for bringing this to our attention. A woman’s body is very delicate and tender, we only have to look at the curves of a woman and you can tell the body is not made to run, jump and bump into other women. Not only that also the fact that we get bruises, dehydrated and injuries from these intense sports tells it is simply not something we should do, neither men or women.

286. It’s interesting that we chase equality down the path of self-destruction, rather than emanating equality through Love and Honour of the body.

287. Introducing sport at a young age, whether male or female, only seeds competitiveness and the mentality that ‘we are better’ or a winning/losing mentality.

     1. The message of competition starts so young and it’s everywhere, it continues from school into the work place, between colleagues, businesses even countries. At what point are we going to see that it does not work and that for true change we need to work together not against one another.

288. I know people who take their 3 year olds to rugby lessons and was shocked to hear they start at that age. I grew up as a sports nut, but I look back and see that it was through sports that 1) I lost that delicateness I had as a boy and 2) I began to use sports as a way of seeking recognition. So much has not changed, only the net has been cast wider.

289. The example provided here is hugely poignant: “Would the women of ancient Rome have seen it as a step towards their equality had they been invited to enter the gladiator’s forum as ‘equal’ combatants with the male gladiators, or perhaps to be equally thrown to the lions, I wonder?”

     If we look at conversations such as this blog http://everydaylivingness.com/raising-boys/ , it becomes obvious that we need to reflect on the suitability of the unnatural hardness we are pushing our boys and men into, even before we start before championing copy behaviour. It is ludicrous that instead of supporting men away from the hardness and harshness imposed on them, we have started to push girls and women into the same mould and calling it ‘equality’!

290. Yes, I was quite surprised by AFL being offered at our school too and how many of the girls were keen to do it. Having played women’s rugby at University I can say, from experience, there is nothing feminine, tender or gentle about it. I certainly didn’t feel like I was equal to men, I did, however, feel the need to drink pints of beer in the bar afterwards – clearly I had numbed myself so much that I just wanted to join in whatever was going. Looking back now, I just wonder why I did it and what I got out of it.

291. We see so much of the hype and pseudo ‘glory’ of sport however we need to see much more of what happens post this lifestyle… how are these people faring once all the recognition is gone, and or they are forced to feel the true impact of sport on their bodies? Not so well according to a TV show earlier this year – it is these stories we need to hear more of as their experiences expose a great deal!

292. At school being good at sport is like a medal of honour. Right from the outset young girls and boys are tempted and lured into playing sports for the recognition and attention it brings. To do this they have to ignore and bury the knowing they have that it actually hurts to compete and use their bodies for this purpose.

293. You make an incredibly good point – we are achieving gender equality on the terms set out by a society that is already clearly unequal – it tells women that to prove their worth and claim themselves as equal to men they need to measure up and compete on the same level as men – but what if this level is already itself a false platform and by trying to get on that level we are leaving behind something far more valuable? What if gender equality is not about being the same? What if its not about proving that I can run, hit, kick, work like a man can, but about living the expression of a true woman and valuing that equally to the expression of a true man, even if they might be different expressions?

294. Any sport separates us from our divine beauty and preciousness, it is awful to observe that nowadays even injuries through sport are accepted and championed. By encouraging young girls to play traditionally male sports,we say yes to a further abuse of our bodies and this has nothing to do with gender equality but will be the cause of even more competition and inequality between men and women once more robbing both gender from their innate tenderness.

295. Or do we want to raise our girls to be the sensitive, self-nurturing, gorgeous women they all are on the inside? Absolutely we do. And if it wasn’t for the presentations by Serge and Natalie Benhayon I would have stayed resolutely ignorant of the womanly truth I now know from within my body.

296. The increasing number of girls partaking in sport such as AFL and the social encouragement of it is very telling of a more sinister agenda. A woman or young girl cannot stay in the preciousness and womanliness she naturally is, when playing such an aggressive sport. And hence the rise in the number of gynaecological illnesses that pervade today and speak loud back to us about what we are doing to our bodies as women.

297. Sooner or later we will come to the realisation that sport is an abuse on the body, whether it is men or women who play it.

298. A great great question and blog on the truth of this current combat of ; fighting or setting the standards of equality. We are aiming to be equal and have this platform in sports ready for girls.. But what we need to see, as this blog exposes, is that the platform what we’re offering is contrary to what true equality actually is. And hence we put girls into this ideal they are equal whilst actually they are fighting their own sensitivity, their own nature of being a woman (womenlihood) and hence, we should ask ourselves the question: Are we willing to admit that we have equality all wrong – that it is not about having the same position as men – but letting out the true warmth of a woman and her nurturing qualities that she naturally holds. Not being hard or tough.

299. This is an amazing invitation to have an open discussion about what exactly is happening through the stages of childhood that we, as the adults of this world are supporting.

     1. What is it that we are hiding from that we don’t want our young girls to reflect back to us?

300. The tampon revolution had the unintended consequence of shutting women off from their flow and need for tender love and care of themselves, instead we were sold a time of full activity from swimming, rollerskating to being an astronaut when this time of the cycle is an opportunity to reflect, be super nurturing, loving and still. Instead we have become masters of motion with no thought or consideration for the quality that moment is in.

301. Why do parents want their young daughters – and young sons – to ‘toughen up’ by playing rugby and contact sports. In the U.K. the boys play according to age, but there is such a variety in growth and strength in any one age bracket. Smaller children can just get crushed. There is a call for teams to be chosen according to weight, as with boxing. This doesn’t resolve the problem however.

302. From playing rugby at a young age to women being on the front line in the army – is this what we really want for women in the world today?

     1. What is interesting too is that girls and young women are choosing this. So the real question to ask might be: what has happened for us as women to actually want to be hardened and toughened? Have we lost a true sense of self here?

        1. Yes this comes more to the root of it Henrietta. Well asked.

     2. Sue its a big concern, even at a local play area in an Airport yesterday I noticed how aggressive some girls were acting as they practiced their kick boxing.

303. And this is not just limited to Australian football league. The same is evident in women’s American football in which the women are also half naked. Similarly, to athletics, beach volleyball etc. Not only are women desensitised but objectified also.

     1. OMG I was not aware of this and just looked it up! So very damaging all around!

304. Thirty years ago I was one of those girls that was on the rugby field at lunch time trying to tackle a boy by grabbing him by the jumper and swinging him around. I had no real sense on my sensitivity and preciousness at all and thankfully my parents spoke with the school and it was decided that it was inappropriate to be playing with the boys in this way at such a turning point of going into pubity. At the time I was devastated and annoyed but today can say it was a turning point in my life.

305. Obviously this debate is heavily influenced by the belief that any sport is good for you no matter how brutal or competitive. This is something we have to examine as a society for the evidence in our bodies points to this belief being flawed.

     1. This is a brave and valid point. Because this isn’t just about young girls and women – exactly the same debate needs to be had about boys sport and sport in general – and a great route into this debate is via our bodies, which are screaming at us very loudly that these brutal and competitive activities are not supporting us.

     2. This is a huge consciousness that society needs to wake up to. Sports is not always good for us – for if it was we would not have athletes suffering depression, getting cancer and other serious issues that clearly say it is not healthy as a whole way of being.

     3. I agree Andrew that is also what I have been observing, the strong belief that anything sport is good for us and the tougher and the intenser the training the better.

     4. The word sport itself is interesting. Really there is nothing sporting or supporting or about competitive sport unless you like sporting a bruise or injury.

306. Yes Susan and it is indeed championed in our society that we give everyone the same treatment and same opportunities and I agree with this to a point but only if we examine what those opportunities are and whether they are harmful for our human species or not to begin with. otherwise we are simply spreading the harm more widely.

307. The signs are all there that contact competitive sports are already making a mess of male bodies – my body still bears the scars of contact sports when I was at school, so why are we expanding it to now include women as well rather than examining the evidence and honestly looking at whether it is doing any of our children or adults any good?

     1. I agree, the level at which school students are being pushed to play their sport at is crazy and completely irresponsible on the coaches behalf, in my opinion, their growing bodies aren’t meant to be driven to such extremes. Hence the rapid increase in all the injuries and the intensity of the injuries – having a knee reconstruction is becoming very commonplace.

308. We have seen the inequality in the treatment of women playing tennis over the years along with the outcry that because their games and strokes aren’t as ‘powerful’ as the men’s, females don’t warrant or deserve equal pay. We have seen women ‘masculinise’ themselves in the name of playing cricket as well. Encouraging this masculinisation of girls and women to play football, of any code, flies in the face of Nature as girls and women, who are left to be themselves and deeply treasure the glory of their being female and the femininity that entails, would no sooner play sport at this level of intensity than fly to the moon.

309. It is easy to see why we have films like the Hunger Games, where the women is tougher and rougher than the guys and wins the day, but the reality is that not one person ever wins when we are competing with each other, let alone encouraging our young children and women to do contact sport.

310. “Girls and Contact Sports: What are We not Discussing?” Is not the ‘what is not being discussed’- purpose, the purpose to and for life?

311. All I can say is thank heavens for the teachings of Universal Medicine, which bring us back to and honour the delicacy of our true nature and support us to be more loving and gentle in our movements.

312. It’s absolutely crazy that girls are expected to do sports like this, and even more crazy that they are excited about doing it. Wow we really are barking up the wrong tree in terms of moving forward with gender equality. Surely we need to honour the difference between the genders and value the qualities that each bring.-each quality being viewed as no more or no less important.

     1. Well said Rebecca, rather than driving this false equilibrium or indeed trying to pigeon whole men and women, would it not be of greater service to appreciate the natural qualities that make everyone of us inherently connected.

313. This is so true; ‘this is a sorry indictment of the lack of value we as a society place on femaleness, if not on the complete undermining of all qualities associated with the expression of true womanliness.’ There is so little encouragement for girls and boys to live their natural qualities of sensitivity and delicateness, in society these qualities are almost seen as weaknesses and as children become older these natural qualities are often replaced with a hardness and toughness that isn’t natural at all.

314. Sport and competition have always been about pushing the body beyond our limits that are like chasing smoke and for nothing lasts forever. Our vessels are built for different functions but, sport was never in the original plans!

315. We do need a seriously open forum to discuss this, and in the same way you held and delivered yourself Colleen free from emotions and the knowing that the beauty you are within. How will either the man or woman know who they are in truth without the truth being represented and presented from those who are living that beauty within. Our beauty within is our most valued commodity as a human race.

     1. For many there is no other normal hence the importance of these discussions. And for even more importance we need people as in adults, families and children to be living the true delicate, sensitive and strong role models that we all are by nature.

316. With a young daughter that is delicate yet strong and powerful all at the same time it does concern me how contact sports are seen as the norm and not being part of that is considered strange, yet when I see her or just look into her eyes, nothing in her is about contact sports. So if she played these it would be against her very being, and truth be told so is it for boys as well as girls. As a society perhaps we need to ask – why we champion contact sports so much?

     1. Perhaps we as a society are not taking the precious moments and time to look deeply into our young girls eyes and see their sensitivity and that contact sports goes completely against their nature. This can then leave our girls seeking recognition which is everything a sport delivers. But recognition and identification through achievements are a mere poor second for the love within and that can be had between people.

317. The disease is spreading. I recently learned that not only are contact sports growing in the West, the quest now is for global expansion of contact sports in other countries, including India and Pakistan.

318. Thank you for your great blog Colleen. I have noticed that this was happening but did not realise the full extent of it and it is a disaster for young girls to be railroaded onto such brush sports, especially under the guise of gender equality! It is a disaster enough foreign boys. I witnessed on TV news a young man in his twenties who is now paralysed form the neck down from being injured in football being wheeled out to encouraged there youngsters to join up the game and not give up on it just because his life has been ruined. It was the sickest thing I have seen in a long time – the manipulation of him and by him of a sport that cares not about the carnage left in its trail.

319. ‘So… we are effectively free to abuse our bodies in the same way as the men do? Is that what we are saying?’ …. any abuse of any kind is not ok. As a society, we have had a shortage of true role models, as in people who are choosing to live the truth of who they are, but this is gradually changing as we are realising what we have been searching for lies in our inner heart and it’s just a matter of re-connecting to what we already know. As more and more people choose to return to their natural way of being, young men and women will feel and be reminded of the divine qualities they also hold within – with this knowing, it will be much harder for them to choose to do anything that is abusive.

320. I once worked with a high level representative netballer (which is played exclusively by women in Australia). That is not a contact sport as much but it still required significant hardening and it may be interesting to record the amount of female health issues these women have and how much they differ from their non-competitive peers.

321. As long as we continue to feed the comparison and competition between men and women, both parties will continue to feel they have something to prove. The more we, as a society, support each other to know that we are already everything we need to be in life, we will naturally start to appreciate ourselves and each other and learn to celebrate our differences, learning from each other, rather than seeing it as a point of weakness.

322. This leaves me feeling very sad, knowing how long it is taking me to rediscover my own femaleness after a lifetime of competing with men in business and in sport (squash in my case) – the hardness in my body has been pretty extreme, affecting my health (arthritis), my relationships (divorced) and every aspect of my life (overweight, stressed, miserable and lonely). I am pleased to report that is now changing, with a slim body, a new relationship and a far less stressed lifestyle, thanks to the many inspirations from Universal Medicine. In the case of children today, this hardness is not necessary, we need to re-educate the education system to include awareness of our bodies and a more gentle way of being.

323. I understand that it seems like a backward step but I attend mixed gender under 8s AFL with my son and daughter and this allows them to play on the same side. Obviously kids want to play sport, as it is fun and social. That is the sport my son choose this year, I would not let him do Rugby for it is just too rough in my option. When my daughter expressed interest and began joining in training I was apprehensive but I discovered that the way the children played was very innocent, most of them just taking the time to stare at the sky. I was surprised that there was no pressure from parents or the coach, most of them don’t know the rules, there are no winners and no score is kept. They do not tackle, when they play other teams they all play on different sides if there is not enough players. I know that as they get older, all sport encourages competitiveness and that this cause further seperation from our body but from personal experience, this sport compared to others in this age bracket actually has been pleasantly surprising as a parent.
     I do not agree however with mixed gender as they grow older, as it is very unsupportive for both sex’s. I also agree that all competitive sport does more harm than we current care to see, to both men and woman and I personally feel you have started a very needed conversation on a pretty controversial subject. Very brave and very exiting, so thank you.

324. A woman living in her true expression of honouring, delicateness, stillness and Sacredness is strong and powerful. Her strength does not require it to be proven through adopting, taking on and competing what is traditionally is in the male orientated arena.

325. The fact that a traditionally male sport has been introduced to young girls and women is an indicator of just how far off the track we as women have gone in not living with the awareness to the preciousness and delicateness of Woman – for if we were connected and living with this and her Sacred aspect thats naturally there within a woman’s body, this proposal I’m sure would not even enter the arena.

     1. It is true that such sports seem strange for women but are they any more sensible for men?

326. Watching men play sport makes me cringe let alone women. It’s incredible to see how far we are away from honoring the tender beings we are, and that the layers to keep this truth away are thickening. When a false equality is searched for a false answer is offered.

     1. Me too, Kim. I have watched my very tender young nephew struggle to toughen up as he starts playing rugby at school, but when I ask him about it he says he loves it, so determined is he to fit in and be like everyone else.

327. A fantastic expose the lies we live … so having decided to live treating one gender as not equal to another now we’re all about gender equality, but it’s a case of following the way of how the other has been without asking if that supports anyone men or women, so you are totally correct … ‘we are effectively free to abuse our bodies in the same way as the men do? Is that what we are saying?’ Rather than having a conversation about how competition and sport harden us and why we might place so much store on them we are lauding bringing women into these sports as ‘equals’ .. but being equal in abuse is abuse, and no fancy offers, career paths or accolades changes that.

328. The image of the tampon bullet-belted GI Jane is a spot-on capturing of the dilemma at hand, and a million miles away from the gentleness women naturally are. It’s sad to contemplate how hardened we’ve all become. We live in a world where it’s now a trend for women to trek to Mt Everest in their spare time and ‘celebrate’ their cancer victories by becoming ultra-marathon runners. It seems the further we stray from tenderness, the more hardness we need to pull in.

329. Thank you for a great article on women playing Rugby and the effects it has on the naturally delicate female body also with the false notion that this would give them gender equality. When women are in their tenderness and stillness this reflects to men their own tenderness, Rugby is a call to both genders to toughen up all the more, a huge step for women away from their tenderness.

330. Whilst it is celebrated by society as ‘equality’ and giving both sexes equal opportunity it is in truth just another ploy to separate or enforce the split from the natural intelligence of the body. When connected to the body the quality of our choices are very different and the natural loving, tenderness, sensitivity and joy are lived. Denial of our connection to the body promotes an emptiness and denial of what is felt increasing separation to self and also to each other as we setup to compete and go into comparision.

331. Playing AFL will not support young girls to stay connected to their delicate nature as to play such a tactile sport they have to harden and toughen up and disconnect from their fragility and sensitivity. Just as young boys playing AFL have to disconnect from their tenderness to play the game. In my opinion AFL should not be played by either gender.

332. This needs to be exposed and expressed so thank you for starting the conversation Colleen. This is exactly on point to what is at play, “…having successfully imposed such false and erroneous rigours upon one gender, we are now further compounding this gargantuan error by imposing the same on girls and then covering this collective madness under the insidiously deceptive ideal of ‘gender equity’?”. We haven’t stopped to look at what started this process of imposing on males to be rough and tough and aggressive first. And then seeing how damaging this is make changes, and both males and females learn from it… not replicate and repeat it.

333. I used to be addicted to ‘hard, tough, bootcamps’ and have pulled large tyres along hot sandy beaches. I also used to live a life of being very hard on myself, always pushing, striving and driving to achieve ‘something’. This left me feeling quite helpless at times, unknown how to return from that hardness.

     Enter Universal Medicine and Esoteric Women’s Health, and the hardness started to drop away as I replaced it by starting to live my gentleness, power, sacredness, and stillness – I started to reconnect to my femaleness. Now living this more and more, I could never contemplate dragging tyres along a hot sandy beaches. I still exercise, and at times strenuously, but always in honouring of my body and my femaleness.

     1. This is amazing Sarah. You look like such a beautiful feminine woman (who also knows her own mind, not easily led) – this is a brilliant turn-around from ‘hard, tough bootcamps’. Wow!

     2. Same here Sarah, when you have felt how strong and delicious it feels to be tender, honouring of our body and our femaleness I could never go back to those boot camp days. Hard work yes, body busting no!

334. Observing young girls and boys walking around with there uniforms on, the feeling is they are identified by there team and the colours, which is another step away towards the insidious ways we feel about our-self. So what is the end game, could we all learn to undress from the armour or uniform we wear and team up to put on the cloak of transparency, so that a different way is seen and felt in society! So who asks us to dress up in this armour we are wearing as a badge of honour, and this starts at local, then regional, onto state and finally national or possibly global when we take in all the super hero’s who are saving the world, could it be our parents who have not truly understood what was missing from there childhood and thus force us into competitive games?

335. I can see why you highlighted this in bold ‘from the age of 6’ that is such a young age! Reading the beginning of your blog I could not help but think many people would not agree with you and instead see this as a positive thing. But I get what you are saying and I am with you on this one. I guess ultimately we can call things like this out, expose them, flip it on its head and have a discussion about topics such as these which is great because it then gets more and more people talking about it. Which in turn supports people to question, ponder … or argue! However, what it comes down to is how we live because what will be will be but if women and girls (and men and boys) start reflecting a different quality that we are not on mass living as humanity.. that is appreciating who we are, knowing we are enough, embracing delicateness, tenderness and sweetness – which all are actually a strength and not a weakness and we have been brought up to believe, then this, this will offer others something different to what is currently been lived in the world today and then they get to see and make different choices if they so wish.

336. Thank you Anon for exposing how young girls are being encouraged to participate in aggressive contact sports at ever younger ages which can only serve to further disconnect them from their innate delicate selves and no doubt store up many potential problems for the future. This is certainly a topic that needs to be urgently discussed and challenged. Gender equity gone mad and at great expense to the many young girls that are being encouraged to forsake the tenderness that is naturally theirs.

337. It’s interesting when we consider that women are chasing equality with the male ideal which is based on men having to absolutely deny their innate tenderness and ‘toughen up’ to society’s expectations of what a man should be. So women are denying their own delicateness to become more like the false version of men that is the illusion that has become reality!

338. I agree that contact sports aren’t a natural expression for boys, girls, women or men… I understand the joy in exercise and being in a team but there are ways we can be doing this without beating up our bodies in the process.

339. That is some big statistics and I am wondering why the increase now, why are women young and old throwing themselves into sports like AFL now? I know from experience of seeing the results of sports injuries on people around me that it doesn’t appear to be worth it and I am fitter and stronger now then ever before and I don’t play any sport at all. So if we can still be fit without the extremes then why do we put ourselves into these physical challenges and why so now are we seeing such an increase in this for women? As the article is presenting where do we go to next with our quest for this visual equality and are we looking for the ‘equality’ in all areas in place of settling on quality. From my view the quality of who we are as opposed to the things we do brings true equality in people and anything else is something that will always be trying to do in the face of just being.

340. I love the way this argument it structured, what is clear is not just that contact sports are not the way forward for girls to attain gender equality, but that these same contact sports have diminished and belittled the connection boys have to their natural selves also. There is no celebration of women for their femininity at present, the race currently seems to be towards embracing masculinity in its most destructive form.

341. I have seen adverts for women’s contact sports and how it is glamorised, enticing young girls and women into such sports . One could argue this is an equalising move to now include women into being tough and hard as boys have been brought up to be, like having women soldiers, but wow what a huge step away from the sensitivity we are as women and men. At least one gender had society’s permission to honour their sensitivity.

     I suspect I would have been easily seduced by such advertising, a willing pawn in a game that goes far beyond just making money for corporate businesses. There is a far greater game at play and that is us as human’s walking away from who we truly are, our potential for harmony and love, to a nature that is a base version which accepts conflict and even revels in it. I can only wonder how this will affect our personal relationships and the statistics for domestic abuse.

342. The English women’s cricket team recently won the World Cup, they were so masculine in every way it was deeply sad as you share this is celebrated as advancement. We are very much lost in our ways currently under the illusion of progress.

343. Competition is not healthy, for either men/boys or women/girls. Moving it away from both genders rather than closer would be true care for both genders equally.

344. The other day my partner showed me an action picture of some rugby players and at first glance I thought they were men, but on closer inspection I realised they were women. It is horrific to know the extent of the hardness these women must take on to be in combat with each other, and all in the name of sport.

345. When I connect to my sacredness I understand the true meaning of strength.

346. Brilliant blog and brilliant title. We are not discussing this upsurge in sports like rugby football wrestling boxing and there is even a campaign for women tennis players to “raise their game” and compete under the same rules as men. The world is losing out big time if the gorgeousness of women is to be compromised like this.

347. Oh dear. It seems like we’re going to have to go to extremes before we make our way back.

348. I was watching something recently where young women who played AFL were being interview. They were very masculine in their mannerisms and the sound of there voice was also masculine. I remember as a younger women choosing to wear for masculine style clothing, but it seem we are now taking this a step further, pushing our bodies further and harder, so that on the surface level we seem the same. The question I have is when we are not being ourselves, expressing our true natures what then happens to everyone else. In this case what happens to the boys when they see more young women who are more masculine than feminine? What happens to the quality of their relationships? Do young men then get to see the tenderness that they naturally carry within? I seems we are getting further and further away from our natural expressions and inherent natures by using ourselves to fit into a mould or an accepted way of living life.

349. The trend has been more and more for us women to toughen our bodies and compete also physically with what men can do. But in this we fail to see how much we desensitise ourselves, and where are we going as a whole of society when being fragile and vulnerable is not being honoured anymore by nor for neither of the genders?

350. ‘So… we are effectively free to abuse our bodies in the same way as the men do? Is that what we are saying?’ This is a great call, Anonymous. I am sure there are many who would dispute that men abuse their bodies when playing rugby or football, but when taking a step back, in the cold light of day, we can see men with bleeding heads and other injuries as a common occurrence. Is this not abuse? So why would we, in the name of equality subject women to the same? What if in the name of equality, we all chose to become more tender and come back to our innate sensitivities?

351. We all know of stories where women have out done men by joining in with he hardness, force and much to get what they want. This does not honour who men or women truly are. A rethink of policy is essential, women and men are born equal, we have our own ways of expressing, and we can truly compliment and support one other when we are not put against each other in such a way.

352. I have the pleasure of teaching many teenagers in an FE college where the main focus of the curriculum is on sport. I have observed with the girls how hard most, if not all, have become and how in denial they are of their femaleness – for them it doesn’t feel like it is a consideration but it feels all wrong. Coupled with that I have noticed too how sensitive all of the boys are – to go hard and into competition is abusive to their essence too. They are all simply gorgeous but this gorgeous sensitivity and delicacy isn’t confirmed in them. In many cases, the girls often feel harder than the boys.

353. True equality is not in what we do but in who we are. Who we are is innately equal for we originate from the one source of love. Trying to ‘create’ equality, without knowing it within is an mistake.

354. Wow. It takes a truly courageous woman to write a blog like this. There is no point striving for equality when we are striving to be as lost and bereft as each other. It is only in connection to soul that we know true equality.

355. When we see and feel a beautiful tender child, boy or girl, and we see and feel older children playing rugby, there is no resemblance whatsoever of the two. The roughness and toughness is not who we are or where we are from, it is the behaviour we have chosen as a facade. The sweet delicacy remains within.

     1. I have two boys and I’ve watched them grow up being sensitive and not understanding when girls started being rough and kicked and punched them for no reason and they couldn’t stop it. Of course in truth the girls would not choose to do this naturally. It shows how as children we are watching the adults in our lives constantly, seeing what is acceptable and the standard of respect they have for themselves and each other. There are so many derogatory comments that are spewed out about either gender that just continue to cement the separation even more. Boys don’t like to be hurt or rough as equally as girls don’t.

356. ‘Inherent within the girl is the woman that is to be with all of her tenderness, stillness, sacredness and joy’. These few words are so powerful and the loss of this invites a grieving process that comes from deep within, for we all can truly feel the truth of this and the effect its loss will have on the world..

357. I was not very good at contact sports at school, and when we had to play hockey, I used to run the other way if I saw the puk coming at me. If young girls are choosing to go into these rough sports and harden themselves, how are young boys and men supposed to adore, honour and cherish them if they are not choosing to do it themselves?

358. If little girls were taught from young how to listen to what they felt to be true and honour that, it would be interesting to see what they did or didn’t choose as they grew up and whether they would push their bodies to compete with men like they now do. We are definitely, both men and women alike, a long way away from living in respect of our fragility at great cost to our bodies so this is a much needed conversation that is long overdue.

359. When we truly understand and accept how precious, delicate and sensitive our bodies are, we will realise this kind of sports and competitiveness is hugely harming for both boys and girls.

360. Sports offer men and women socialization in the art of comparing, competing and training hard to defeat another one so to claim victory.
     Although praised by society as something healthy, there is nothing healthy about it if we consider the whole package we are buying into and the overall consequences for men and women alike.

361. Reading this I could not help but be struck by the growing chasm for women between what is being offer under the lies and guise of ‘equality’, and the true, delicate, precious innate nature of every young girl and woman. It is totally denaturing of women… and therefore also of men. We are left far, far poorer but thinking we are making progress.

362. Championing this in the way it has been is nothing more than championing the lions who wanted to kill the gladiator in the ring. This is in no way a step forward and is further going to contribute to the illness and disease stats we are plagued with today.

363. Whoa Anonymous – these statistics are shocking – it feels like a new army is being established as an assault team, rather than the support and holding the unfoldment of beautiful and delicate young girls being brought up honouring the true qualities that women hold in their Sacredness.
     “Skills training begins at age 5 and modified mixed gender games at age 8. “

364. Thank you for bringing attention to what is really going on for young girls now and women as part of our education system to be hardened and to compete physically against boys and men eventually. This is very shocking and against everything we are born as young girls and women `alike and the honouring of our innate delicateness sacredness and love. Raising the question where will we go to next and for this current generation to feel all they are innately are in sensitivity and love is really needed and seeing this in the news and discussing what do we really want for our girls and women in the future is an important key.

365. Shouldn’t we be asking where has the gentle-ness, tenderness and sensitivity gone in our men rather than training our women to be the same as the men?

     1. Good question, it’s so simple yet we’ve made it so complicated – equality has nothing to do with what we do, but with how we are with each other. Two people can do two very different tasks, however they are still equal in the simple fact that they are both human, regardless of gender, age, social status, sexual orientation, disability, etc. etc. etc.

        1. Great point Viktoria that if we start to consider what is natural supportive behaviour for all of us together as a human species rather than separating things out then many of our current systems would change.

366. Thank you for opening up this conversation. I know from my own experience that competition is a nasty thing to get involved in. My body hardens and the way I am with others is tainted by comparison and a stream of thoughts that is calculating how to beat the other person or berating myself for not being better. Yesterday at work we got a shuffleboard and I could feel the electricity like buzz that came into the other player. If we don’t feel that we are enough already as we are that buzz and the achievements can help cover up the sadness and/or the void that we would otherwise occupy within ourselves.

367. This is an awesome article – particularly interesting and significant in highlighting that such sport and activities are not only in accordance with the true qualities of women but men too are overriding their deep sensitivity and tenderness in order to compete in such sports and in truth almost all sport played competitively are harmful.

368. This is a topic that absolutely needs airing, so thank you for doing so in such a clear and forthright way Anonymous. I shudder when I see young women throwing themselves around a rugby field and at the force that is impacting on their naturally delicate bodies. They look like they are enjoying themselves but I wonder at a deep level if they truly are?

     1. I used to play rugby for a short period roughly a year ago, i joined the rugby team because I wanted to make friends and my high school teacher always told us that if we join a sports team we would always have friends at university. During my time as part of the sports team, I used to scream every time somebody came to tackle me, I used to slow down before I went to tackle another girl because I didn’t want to hurt her too much. Eventually I started making excuses as to why I don’t want to train anymore, but instead of realising that I didn’t want to do it because it just wasn’t for me, I didn’t like it, nor was I any good at it, I criticised myself for not being durable and strong enough – just like we are socialised into thinking we should be as women – tough, hard, warriors.

369. I remember not wanting to play hockey at school because i was worried about getting hit in the ankles by the sticks. I also didn’t like basketball because of the contact that was allowed. I do enjoy sport and exercise but not at the expense of my body. We don’t have to hurt ourselves.

     1. Although I liked to consider myself a tough cookie when I was younger and over-rode my sensitivity as I grew, I remember secretly fearing being hit by the hockey ball. I also loved volley ball but couldn’t actually enjoy it because wow the ball was hard and hurt. At school I wasn’t confident enough to say I didn’t want to play hockey because I didn’t want to get hit, 33 years ago that wasn’t acceptable to express especially to teachers. This is more so now. It’s no wonder the excuses to get out of sports is great by many pupils. I get the impression that these pupils are judged for being lazy and for actually not being good at sport. It’s like a very uncool thing to be because there is also a sensitivity that remains.

        Would they participate if competition were removed and replaced with team work; if actual danger of physical pain with contact from other pupils as in rugby, or balls etc. was taken out and replaced with how to listen to ones body and move in a way that truly benefited it? The disregard we ask of children to undertake certain sports in the way they are undertaken, often asks them to ignore their body’s signals about its own well-being – time to stop running, don’t put oneself in physical danger etc. I wonder how the talks on how to eat well and exercise well (even the message of don’t do drugs or abuse your body) can then be taken on board if that person is used to numbing out on their body’s signals and seeks stimulation to feel at least something as a result. And that something can be the buzz of eating a lot of sugar, or getting recognition for running fastest etc. – all things that put a goal before what the body communicates.

     2. Likewise Debra, hockey was my least favourite sport. I didn’t get it. Why would I want to run round in winter on a frozen or muddy pitch, with a lethal stick chasing a hard ball that could hurt me or others. I often ducked out of hockey. Like you, I love my body and choose exercise that supports rather than harms me.

370. Great to have this discussion Anonymous, the progression of women into men’s sports and wanting to show men we are as good as them (if not better) has gradually been increasing over the years. By choice women have chosen to step into a man’s world in an effort to show that women are equal, but it is not equality we are establishing but further deepening of competitiveness and separation of the two genders.

371. One of the worst things I’ve ever seen is women or girls boxing, beautiful sensitive women bludgeoning each other. The fact that women entertain the sport of beating each other up and other contact sports that result in horrific injuries really demonstrates how far away from being women we have allowed ourselves to become, how low must our sense of self worth be to allow by choice another person to physically hurt us?

372. “Does what we currently offer support our girls to claim their femininity or does it militate against it? Is this not one of those topics that needs a truly open forum discussion so that we can, as a collective, discuss what we truly want for our children as a foundation for the question, where to next?” Most definitely. However we can, wherever we are, show as role models, that there is another way to live gracefully and in our femininity and yet be compatible with modern society. Simone Benhayon and Natalie Benhayon, amazing young women, both powerhouses yet quintessentially female and feminine, show evidence of this.

373. Yes indeed, Anonymous, whatever next? This kind of decision is, as you say, something to be deeply considered by the community, so it is possible to look at the implications from every angle.

374. Anonymous I am a little lost for words, as you say so perfectly “Would the women of ancient Rome have seen it as a step towards their equality had they been invited to enter the gladiator’s forum as ‘equal’ combatants with the male gladiators, or perhaps to be equally thrown to the lions, I wonder?`” perhaps this step which for many is a step forward but actually from all I also understand is a step backwards could be looked on as a wake up step. Perhaps we have to observe and notice the difference that occurs with these women and if thats really what we want in society? Having seen girls go from tender to much more hard and protected as they play competitive sports it’s really does raise the question of why are we not appreciating and valuing women for who they already area?

     1. Yes, indeed, the example of the women of Ancient Rome stepping into the gladiator ring to show equality with men clearly makes the point. When taking a step back, women taking part in rugby and rough contact sport shows the same thing in a modern situation. It doesn’t fit… does it?

375. Like you Colleen, I observe with dismay, the promotion of girls and contact sports, including boxing, knowing as I do, the main motivation is not to promote equality, but expand the business and profits of sports. The young girls, willing pawns in this game stand to lose much more than they will gain.

376. A great article Anonymous. “So… we are effectively free to abuse our bodies in the same way as the men do? Is that what we are saying?” This week on the radio I listened to a woman being celebrated for her prowess in boxing. What are we raising our young women to be like? Society doesn’t currently value the innate preciousness and delicateness of females – so we try to outdo – out-man – the men, not only in business but now in contact sports. Only twenty years ago this would have been unthinkable.

377. When the world and people around us are not confirming of who we truly are, it is not going to be easy for any of us to stay connected and nurture what is innately natural and true for us yet so contradictory to what we see outside. When we the mature women are not ‘the sensitive, self-nurturing, gorgeous women’ ourselves, what are the chances of our next generation turning into that? We have a responsibility to seed forth for the truth to be reignited and lived again.

378. Great blog. Important points raised here about true femininity and what truly nurtures that – something that the world seems to have forgotten or does not truly value.

379. I must agree with your concern for those young women now choosing to play AFL Football. To me it is definitely not OK for our delicate bodies to have to bear this full on. We are the other side of an equal coin and we are meant to be different not the same as a man. Our role here on earth is about Love , joy and harmony.

380. The increase in women’s contact sports, and hence an aspirational attraction for young girls, is not confined to Australia but also here in the UK and other countries. This is an indictment of society’s lack of regard for the delicateness of the female body and further suppresses the recognition of the tenderness of men. As you correctly ask, Anonymous, this is a topic that deserves wide dissemination.

381. It comes as no surprise to me that this bludgeoning of a woman’s body is being encouraged knowing that the most scared of women is living in Australia. Something (an energy) is encouraging women to be the complete opposite to what is potentially on offer to all women not just in Australia but all around the world and that is for a woman to live in the sacredness she naturally is. And if we all lived from this sacredness there is no way we would ever engage in contact sport.

382. This is a really interesting topic of discussion, and it will make a great study in the future to research the effects of such contact sport on a woman’s body. I know from experience that when a woman hardens her body then all sorts of health issues come to the surface, such as painful periods, missed periods, Endometriosis, Ovarian cancer, Breast cancer. Is it possible that women need to be brought to their knees with illness and disease before they will listen to their bodies above what they are told they should aspire to ?

     1. Mary it would be interesting to see how women’s bodies are as a result of being involved in sport over a period of time. Maybe we are not really wanting to see studies like this because we know that it will not look favourable on sport at all. I saw a program a while ago that interviewed men and women elite athletes after their retirements. None of them were travelling well. Physical illness, ongoing injuries, mental ill health and social isolation and even abandonment. Not really the life after a high level and high living sports career, anyone would expect. But these truths need to be told, even if it is over and over again.

383. “So… we are effectively free to abuse our bodies in the same way as the men do? Is that what we are saying?” Yes that is actually what it is saying. Wouldn’t it be more gender equality to remind men to the fact of how tender they are, actually too tender to play these kind of sports?

384. How about for a change that rather than women feeling that they need to outperform the men and do it all in broken heels (as the pop song goes), that they embrace their deeply nurturing quality and give us the inspiration to join them there. I know for me that would offer something challenging and incredible that would melt me inside, as opposed to increasing the opportunities for young women to learn to apply a tough exterior.

385. When will we realize that our greatest strength, both women and men, lays within and not how hard and tough we build the vessel we are contained within.

     1. As you say Steve, our true power, which is “our greatest strength”, lies within each ‘vessel’ simply waiting to be tapped into by Love so that we neither gender would ever look at manning up in any form of competition.

386. While we give recognition for what young people do rather than for who they already are they will seek to do things that hold the prospect of admiration and adulation.

387. Thank you for sharing Anonymous . Its difficult to believe that parents summit their children for professional sports training at 6 years, when one considers all the work and effort to having a baby and then to discard them to the professional sports system.

388. For me girls playing in the AFL is not a positive thing and is definitely not to be celebrated, it feels cruel to encourage girls to go against their natural nature of being delicate and fragile by offering them to behave in a way that is opposite to their natural way of being. I spent many years trying to prove that I was as tough and hard as boys and men and I ended up very disconnected from my femaleness and precious female qualities, my body was hard and I felt empty, it feels beautiful to now to be living in a more gentle way that honours my sensitivity and delicateness and it is clear to me that this is a natural way to live.

389. These are interesting facts that you have provided here Colleen. It does seem such a shame that girls can be raised into this sporty way of life from such a young age….for me, I was never into sports, but still was really into competing and trying to be as tough as the boys. Now years later, I am still trying to undo all of that and actually embrace the woman that I am.

     1. It can be difficult sometimes to change your mentality, I mean I am only 22 and still I sometimes start to rush and put myself second because things need to be done. I always manage to hurt myself, break a nail, get a bruise, twist a finger, etc. etc. but it’s like something comes over me and I think “well if I don’t do this in a rush, hardening everyone single cell of my body then I’m not doing it well enough so just suck it up and do it” – pft, where is the love?

        1. Just get on with it, suck it up and all of that is such an abusive way to talk to ourselves. I have done it for years and have only just become more and more aware of my nasty self talk.

390. We accept so many non-truths because we do not listen to the body and understand the impact that something like AFL football actually has on our bodies. The body knows and tells us exactly what is good for it or not and the more we deny these messages the more illness and disease we are opening ourselves up to.

391. Thank you Anon and I too share your disappointment at such a move. The very nature of Rugby is to bludgeon the opponent and the injuries that arise from the sport is shocking. It is utter madness to think that encouraging young girls and women to play this sport is supporting gender equality, which can never be attained in the field of any competition. The only outcome that will arise from this decision is more illness and injury and I expect that no one explained this inevitable consequence to the young girls so eager to participate.

392. This truly is sad, for right across the board now we have women world cup rugby, football, cricket and if these young girls grow up in a sports mad family they will think it only natural to put their bodies through what ever it takes to harden up in order to play these sports. I grew up thinking that unless you played rugby there was something wrong with you, I would hate any child of mine not to know it is a choice and not a good one to partake in something that can seriously harm the body and take you away from the true delicate nature that we are all from.

     1. Wise and lived words. Whatever madness is going on in the education system, we parents (and by that I mean all adults – with or without child) have a responsibility to support our children to see that there is another choice. But it’s really hard for these kids. So much social kudos is attached to sporting achievements, so we need to really understand that and see it from their perspective and support them very deeply and humbly – rather than just imposing sanctions or opinions.

        1. Yes, Otto, the humbleness not to impose but to offer by example and without judgment an alternative is the key to support others to know that there is a different way and then it is for them to choose.

393. These new statistics on the participation of young girls in such brutal sports as AFL and rugby are really alarming and disappointing, to say the least. I could not imagine throwing my 9 year old daughter into some rugby league to get her body smashed on a regular basis all in the name of ‘gender equality’. Why not simply honour the true characteristics of girls and women as described so well by Anonymous in this blog so we (as men) can learn from their inherent sacredness and femaleness how to be the gentle and tender caring men that we are born to be, instead of championing a violent sport where two teams pummel each other to a bloody pulp and then feel good about themselves when they ‘win’ the game. Why are we feeling good about beating each other up, anyway?

394. Actually we do not need these training programs per se as they do not support that what is truly needed in our societies as the true answers to the issues we are facing. Why are we so lost in society, why are things getting out of hand? Could it be that introducing these kind of programs is just a expression of the same what is already bring the atrocities we face in our societies because simply we do not know anymore who we naturally are?

395. I have been observing many advertisements on tv lately for pads and tampons and many of them show young women in physical, rough and hard contact sports outlaying to many that it doesn’t matter if you have your period you can just continue to play hard. Having these heavy images on tv offers young girls little in the way of feeling their bodies and connecting with their inner gorgeousness but sells a way of being that negates their essence and then holds them in a game of tug of war with boys which also then hurts the boys too. True equality for both boys and girls is giving them the opportunity to connect and celebrate their innate qualities and to take the competition off the table and nurture the essence of who they are.

396. As long as women and girls are taught and believe that gender equality has anything to do with outmaling the men, things are going to get even worse before they can get better.

     1. Yes, until we learn to appreciate the tenderness in ourselves and in men, we will forever be heading downhill!

397. It doesn’t feel like a win for anyone with girls being actively recruited and enticed into yet another arena of physical endurance beyond how our bodies are innately designed. It’s not about being weak, sissy, or incapable, it’s about honouring, nurturing and living our innate qualities. Whatever the motivation, if we were to ask our bodies ‘do you want to be put through all this’ what is our own sense of the return reply?

398. I felt very sad reading through your blog, Colleen. The shocking statistics of rising suicide rates and mental illness in men tell a story and show the results of the perpetration of the false ideals and beliefs around what it is to be a man. Our very tender and sensitive young boys are all too often told to ‘toughen up’, pulling them away from their natural gorgeous selves – the sad results of which are being all too keenly felt. Now, with an epidemic of young women choosing to join young men in their quest to toughen up, they too are, dismissing their exquisite sacredness in place of proving they too can hold their own in the world of sport. With so many men, and women, choosing to disconnect with who they naturally are, how will we relate to each other? How will we be able to express the enormous love that we hold in our inner hearts for our selves let alone for each other? By dismissing the truth of who we naturally are, we are numbing the thing that we all crave the most, our ability to love.

399. I remember observing young boys playing soccer against a team of girls, which is quite common in the younger years, and the boys were quite frustrated afterwards as they felt they couldn’t play with the same intensity that they would have against another team of boys as something held them back. That something is to be treasured – they didn’t want to ‘hurt’ the girls, or behave in an aggressive manner towards them. Showing an innate appreciation for the fragility and vulnerability that they felt girls/women naturally hold. It was gorgeous that the boys felt this and were able to articulate why they were frustrated. It’s shocking that so many young women are prepared to disconnect from their preciousness to such an extent that they would consider playing rugby or AFL, such incredibly brutal sports and a very sad reflection on us as a society that we are encouraging this as being a positive thing.

400. I was in complete shock at the response to the introduction of the women’s AFL league. I know women have been playing AFL for years, but for it now to be so highly championed and encouraged is a real sad state of affairs, in my view. I can see how easy it is to get caught up in wanting to be equal to men, to wanting to be as tough and rough as them..whilst non-sensical, I get it…because I used to be that way. But now, after having realised that I don’t have to be that way, and it’s not actually natural for me to be that way, I am able to appreciate just how sensitive we are and that sensitivity is an enormous strength and quality that supports us all.

     1. Elodie that I feel is common in many women, this feeling that they have to compete with men like for like. And that because of this sport is seen as a way to match up and show our worth. But as you have connected to, women don’t have to compete, and that true success is that women and men don’t go striving to measure up but appreciate their own value, as they are.

401. It’s so awesome what you share here Anon. I have been seeing increasing amounts of female football advertised, and recently saw some major ad campaigns championing young girl’s participation as a great feet. Yet when I watch a game on TV all I can see if young women making themselves tough and incredibly hard. Doesn’t this say so much about the current paradigm with which we view life? We’re all still championing a stiff upper lip when the whole time being connected and delicate, gentle and sweet is all that both genders ever really need. This mismatch of our roles is a big but tragic game.

402. This topic greatly interests me but as a man I wonder about the reaction to me saying I cringe at female contact sport. I can’t watch it, and not because I see women as less but as this article states it is an illusion of gender equality. Women possess innate qualities that are precious and sacred and are equal to men not through athletic accomplishement but by accepting their power and grace. This should not be mistaken for seeing a woman only for how she appears, but that when she holds these qualities with a knowing she is enough and need not match men then this is a step much closer to gender equality than women going into battle in a sports arena and mimicking the macho behaviour of men. In truth it is both men and women whose wellbeing would benefit from being less hardened and captivated by sporting accomplishements, for if you observe a small child of either gender they have a tenderness that is vibrant and joyful that we need never lose and needs no recognition to feed them feelings of self worth.

     1. You’re not alone Stephen, I feel the same. Equally, I cannot watch men play rugby or box and it is the same with many sports. What is worrying is the open exploitation of children, young women and men by promoters and parents in pursuit of fame and promise of an illusory equality. Tenderness and grace squashed, the human being becomes a vehicle for profit making and by any means necessary.

     2. So true, Stephen, when each gender is expressing from their true nature then that is genuine gender equality.

403. Definitely a topic that needs to be opened and discussed. People are entitled to choices so the excitement presented is an indication that this is a collective choice that they have a right to choose. Before asking the question of how would years of hard sports for women allow them to return to their delicateness and tenderness, I would ask why in the first place this hardness is chosen and championed so that making this choice to join the sports games is something to be excited about? What is the self worth of women to have to discard all that is natural to become something that we are not?

404. Well exposed Colleen.. to toughen and rough up a young girl through sport i see no different to roughing her up in any other physical way; it’s still abusive or abuse just masked through sport’s popularity to make it ok [when clearly it’s not as your articles shares].

405. Very well said Anonymous and thus the set-up is revealed – keep humanity divided by setting up the genders to compete against each other and when that gets too much and the ill way is exposed, send everyone in the completely and seemingly opposite direction along the one and same very spectrum of energy as they go for ‘equality’ by way of having the women try to out-male the men when the truth is that this ‘excess motion’ is what got us into this mess in the first place and not only that, it is a far cry from true maleness which is to move in and with the quality of femaleness, which is the Stillness found deep in the heart of us all. A quality we will never reconnect to when we are bludgeoning the body in this way.

406. As a girl who sought martial arts as a sport, I have been in a position where it is all about not being seen to be weak. I think I even tried AFL once but it didn’t stick. The facts is I did it to prove a point because I was in a place where I wanted to prove to the world I was fine on my own – when deep down I wanted the total opposite. It is sad how a woman can go from a tender baby to someone who just wants to be hard and tough. So some really strong points you raise here about why we have girls wanting to prove themselves when actually the power of stillness we bring is an equal but opposite expression of the physical power a man may bring.

407. I recently found this promotion of contact sports has started and is applauded in local schools, mostly because it attracts rare funding to support certain students. The themes emerged as I read this article – The lack of value that is placed on the delicate qualities of a woman in society and the perception that we are not strong when we are feminine and delicate. This is far from the truth and I feel most powerful when I am surrendered to these qualities. When I am competing and hardening up in this ‘man’s world’, I never feel enough. This will become apparent to the girls who ‘reach for the stars,’ and play AFL as no women’s sports attract the same interest (value) or financial support that men’s sports receive. Does this not just confirm their lesser status and worth in society?

408. Our world so calls for the true reflection of women. Thank you for this blog Anonymous that asks us to consider why we would choose to dishonour our very nature.
     “Inherent within the girl is the woman that is to be with all of her tenderness, stillness, sacredness and joy.” This is inherent within every woman.

409. How can a young woman connect with her tender sensitivity when she has already spent several years disconnecting from her physicality in order to compete with and mix it with the boys?” It would be a real struggle for a young women to connect with her tender sensitivity, once she has built up that physical hardness.

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