Domestic Violence – have we Normalised this Abuse?

Why is it that when we hear the words domestic violence, people often look the other way or feel very uncomfortable? It’s as if we don’t really want to know that it exists and think if we talk in hushed tones, others won’t overhear what we are saying.

In the media and throughout the community it is not given enough airtime or is toned down considerably. In fact, it is now called ‘domestic violence,’ when in reality is it simply an extreme form of abuse. Continue reading “Domestic Violence – have we Normalised this Abuse?”

Are We in an Abusive Relationship with Ourselves?

I read two blog comments and a couple of articles recently that made me sit up straight – very straight indeed. The topic was abuse and it made me realise how relatively easy it is to talk about abuse when it concerns an identifiable victim and a perpetrator as two or several people, when we talk about physical, mental, emotional, financial or sexual abuse. Even the term ‘self-abuse’ has become part of our daily language and we associate it with any kind of visible self-harm, as in cutting or under-eating for example.

But what about the application of the term ‘abuse’ when it comes to drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes or marijuana, kicking the dog in anger, spending hours gaming or watching TV, punching a hole in the wall, slamming a door? Continue reading “Are We in an Abusive Relationship with Ourselves?”

Leaving Things to the Last Minute

Leaving things to the last minute is something that I have done quite often in my life, in many different ways. For me this has mostly played out in the form of procrastination, knowing that something had to be done, but not having the motivation to get to it and do it. Simple things like feeling that I needed to clean somewhere in the house, or knowing that something had to be completed for work but just holding off on doing so, or knowing that I had agreed to do something for another but not finding the time to do it.

I am becoming aware though, that ‘leaving things to the last minute’ can be played out in many different ways in our lives, for instance leaving home with just enough time to get somewhere and invariably running late, or being so busy with work or a project that one is made late for an appointment or meeting, even down to being so busy that going to the toilet is held off until the need is dire. Continue reading “Leaving Things to the Last Minute”

How was your Day? – “Intense”

The last two years of my life have been very, very busy. I have been living away from home a great deal and the work hours have been long – between fourteen and twenty hours a day, mostly seven days a week. The work has been challenging on many levels, the learning curve steep and I can say that I have never worked this hard in my life. On top of this I have been juggling my family life, maintaining and building my relationships and also trying to keep abreast of the other work that I do besides my day job, as well as finding the space in all of this to look after myself.

Certainly it has been a busy time but my story is not unique: working hours are expanding, the internet has blurred the boundaries between office and home, and many of us are seeing that, with the world as it is, there is always work to be done. Continue reading “How was your Day? – “Intense””

Baby milestones – the Beginning of an Unhealthy Lifestyle in Comparison and Competition

We may consider it to be a normal part of everyday life to observe or be swept up in comparison or competition. Men perform for the top spots in business, the fastest legs on the field or the grungiest, hotted up car: we see them competing to ‘get the girl’, to have the most laid-back lifestyle, honours at university or even to drink others ‘under the table’. With women, we see the comparison in our looks, the bikini bodies (or lack-thereof), the hair and all external features, really… From women’s relationships with men, colleagues and friends, to how much and what we eat, business accomplishments, exercise style and how we breastfeed, there aren’t many aspects of life, if any, that have not yet been compared to and competed for. Continue reading “Baby milestones – the Beginning of an Unhealthy Lifestyle in Comparison and Competition”