I love to clean my own car. One of my jobs at home when I was a young teenager was to clean the family car at the weekend and I loved getting soap everywhere, all over myself and the car and then being allowed to use the hose to wash it all off and would occasionally squirt someone from the family who happened to be nearby. Our neighbour would ask me occasionally to clean his car too and would pay me the equivalent of my weekly pocket money, so that was always a bonus.
I was preparing for work this morning and feeling appreciation for the beautiful bed, the brilliant mattress and for the chairs I have, how comfortable my car is, and then I felt something else. I realised how absolutely delicious it is being in my body. And when I say being in my body I mean sitting in it, feeling my legs, toes, arms, chest, spine, all of it, and how deeply stilling it is. No matter where I am, I am learning it is the greatest place I know where I can settle.
Now this may seem weird – one could say we are always sitting within our body, but how present are we when we do that? I know for myself I was always distracted from feeling my body – with thoughts, fidgeting, a raciness that paced around my body from the whirl I lived my life in, and a restlessness to the extent that at times I’d have restless legs that would move and jerk seemingly of their own accord. So I was not sitting within my body, nor was it regenerative, restful or still: in fact I really did not want to feel my body as when I did I would realise how tired I was, and how anxious I was, which would send me into even more of a spin. Continue reading “A Place to Settle – Appreciating my Body”
All through life I have had this body that I have been carting around. An amazing body that I have not really ever stopped to appreciate deeply. This body is my vehicle, my means of getting around from point A to point B, a very useful and practical thing indeed. But have I ever stopped to feel that there is so much more to appreciating this body and all that it can really be, and more importantly, all that it can be a vehicle for?
Well, let’s find out…
For most of my life I have seen my body as just a ‘thing,’ as mentioned before, “something to cart around and get around in.” And most of the time I find myself getting frustrated with my body – why can I not move faster, be less clumsy, get more things done; why do I have to stop to feed, care for and sleep this ‘thing’? Why can I not eat and drink certain foods without the body reacting or getting sick? Continue reading “The Body and My Relationship with it”
Abuse is a very huge box in which so many things are happening, without always showing any clear signs to the outer world. I would like to look into the box and share with you a kind of abuse that we can call ‘self-abuse’ – an abuse of our own body, maybe without the awareness that we do this, or seeing it as a form of abuse.
At the moment we hear a lot about abuse in the Catholic Church, in sport and recently in the movie world. People are sharing their experiences and this can be a beginning to bring abuse into the light. But there is a lot of abuse in the whole world that we don’t see or hear about. Or, could it be that we don’t want to look at it as a kind of abuse? Continue reading “Poisoned through Self-Abuse”
Where does frugality come from? Is it good or bad? Is it something that is entrenched in the way we are raised and determined by our parents’ outlook on life and their financial standing? Is it lingering from times of war and depression? Why is it so entrenched in Christianity? Is it only about money or does it permeate much deeper than dollars and cents alone?
These are questions that have arisen over recent times as I begin to realise that I have lived my life with no true connection to who I truly am, just a reduced version of the real me that I now know is an avoidance of the responsibility I have to bring my true power to everything I do. This way of living life is the polar opposite of how it can be and as I unpick each layer built up to cover my true essence, I look into the nooks and crannies of what has influenced me throughout my life. Continue reading “The Changing Face of Frugality”
If someone had told me when I was younger that I would feel more beautiful in my fifties than ever before, I would have scoffed derisively.
In ‘those days’ – from childhood to 40 – my relationship with my body was based entirely on how it looked and whether it met the grade of whatever aesthetic and fashion standard was set at the time. This in itself was an exhausting exercise, being ever at the mercy of the latest trends and ‘must looks.’ Continue reading “Growing Old Beautifully and Looking Back with Understanding”