by Janina Koch, Cologne, Germany

After what happened on Friday 12 October, 2012 in Australia, I felt to share that I am actually glad not to live in Australia at the moment but in Germany, which is quite far away. But I have also felt that I am not really involved in doing something about all the horrible attacks against Serge Benhayon and the Australian esoteric students – and really against us all, no matter if we live in Germany, UK, Holland, Belgium, Spain, Norway, Sweden, Switzerland, USA, Canada, New Zealand or in other parts of Australia.

Even though I have written an article for the blog site ‘Truth about Serge Benhayon’ (which has not been published yet), I can feel my tendency not to show me or to stand out too much in any way. This is also the way I have lived my life until now, keeping myself in the background, supporting others in what they do, but not stepping up to do what I can actually do or share with others. Instead keeping myself small and not living my potential and my true me; not rocking my position, even in the esoteric community, so I don’t make others uncomfortable by shining my light. Or, as I just realised, being afraid that I might not have a place in the esoteric community if I shine bright.

Half my life I have had this nightmare that I am being chased by someone who wants to kill me… for some time I haven’t had this nightmare. Instead came dreams in which I miss my airplane or train because I keep myself involved in packing my luggage, being distracted and not focussing on what is really important.

So what is really important?

That we claim ourselves and the love that we are, and take the position we are best at, and that we support each other as best as possible. That means that we give our best support in regards to what is going on in Australia at the moment!

Supporting other people in expressing themselves through sharing my experience is what I have done and learned. For example: today I offered my help to an esoteric friend who felt uncomfortable in expressing in another language; the other day I met a friend and brought my guitar and we sang together beautifully – I encouraged her to sing on her own… and the kind of songs she could use for that.

So really it is about communication and expressing your truth. And I’ve now learned what strength and beauty there is in expressing yourself: and to trust in myself – and in the way I do that.