The Only ‘Esoteric’ in the Village – Discernment or Judgement

By Fumiyo Egashira, Japan

This is about my trying to be esoteric and discerning, but because there was no self-love to begin with, I ended up being judgemental. This was exposed through my noticing of a sense of ‘relief’ which followed an uncomfortable sensation in my body: this ‘contraction/relief’ mechanism was traced back to an old belief I had held.

The other day, when I was checking out what my friends were getting up to, reading about what they were recommending – practitioners/presenters/modalities/methods/events etc – I noticed something: I felt as if I was looking for an evidence, a clue to form a judgement and to satisfy myself that they were not esoteric, not of truth, and actually feeling almost relieved when I decided that they were not. Relieved as if I somehow believed that it would make me less if they turned out to be of truth. 

A very similar belief actually came up during my session with an Esoteric practitioner a long time ago, and I thought I had got over it.

This realisation horrified me, pushing me into deep self-loathing and shame, then reminded me of something which made me laugh out loud: ‘The Only Gay in the Village’ – a sketch in a British comedy series called ‘Little Britain’.

In this sketch, this gay guy is dressed and behaving in a very obvious gay manner. He basically shuts himself off from the world, refusing to make connections, and remains aloof, claiming ‘he is the only gay in the whole village’ – while in fact there is another who is willing to embrace him into the community. He likes his position of being the only one so much that he blatantly refuses to accept that there is another gay in the village.

I am not gay, and I don’t live in a village, but wasn’t I separating and excluding myself from the others just like this character while whinging about not having anyone nearby who understands me and my choices – when in fact, the world could be full of equally beautiful people, just like me?

What’s also poignant is this: in this sketch, it is hinted that this ‘gay’ guy may not really be gay after all – this stopped me. This is just so exposing, embarrassingly so.

Here I was, judging the others’ choices as loveless, while I was the one who was holding back that love because I was disconnected and could not feel it inside me – hence the belief that said I would be less if I acknowledged the others’ glory.  

I was desperately looking for that missing part – love – knowing it could not be found outside myself, yet I kept looking out, until I convinced myself that the world had let me down.

So I had to ask myself – do I discern, or do I judge?

It is probable that I do discern correctly. But something else can happen as well.

What has often taken place is this:

I don’t allow and honour my own feelings fully, so this leaves an opening for judgement to be formed very, very quickly – about the subject, and also about myself for making that judgement itself. Once there’s an opening, love starts leaking and what’s not love is so fast to take charge and make the whole thing so complicated and emotionally charged.

I could have gone on to beating myself up for falling for that, but that sketch was way too funny and I had to surrender.

After all, “The Only Esoteric in the Village” in itself is oxymoronic – because when a separative perception takes over the Truth for me to experience the world this way, that’s no longer esoteric.

The old beliefs, the judgements – do not stand a chance against the True Love.

335 thoughts on “The Only ‘Esoteric’ in the Village – Discernment or Judgement

  1. We can become enthusiastic when we find something that feels true and beignet to this that people just aren’t getting it the way that we are….but as is a fact we are all on an unfolding path equally, to our true essence and expression, we are a community, the whole of humanity.

  2. Like to see the glory the whole family Benhayon is living in because the loving choices they made for a longer term is confronting to all of us who made not such a loving choices in their lives. All gets revealed and we can get confronted with the fact that all the not loving steps we made has an effect and the only way to build love again is to make steps back.

  3. I love the comparison between the only gay in the village, a very funny english comedy, but not such a funny subject of separation and judgement at play! As I discover and allow myself to feel my inner beauty the more I am seeing it in people on the street. This is a major shift in how I see others and is simply a reflection of the shift that has happened within.

  4. A very powerful message , thank you so much for this brilliant example.. Showing how we can try and convince ourselves to be “Esoteric” or anything really, whilst avoiding the truth that in fact you are avoiding living it! So powerful.

  5. One word really stood out for me Fumiyo and that word is ‘Surrender’ – in every moment just by surrendering we allows space for truth to find its own way and the rest is history.

  6. This sort of honesty changes the world, it frees us from the imprisonment of our “private” thoughts which allow us to continue to propagate the systems that do not serve us. Freedom is through transparency, love it.

  7. Discernment is essential for anyone who chooses to live a life based on evolution. Judgement on the other hand retards evolution.

  8. “I don’t allow and honour my own feelings fully, so this leaves an opening for judgement to be formed very, very quickly” If we don’t honour our own feelings it means that someone else’s judgement can also influence us and we can join them in their separation, so to speak. When we honour our feelings we are making space for more honest expression and communication.

  9. I loved coming back and reading this again, as I love your willingness to look so honestly at yourself in the pursuit of truth but with the added bonus of humour.

  10. A brilliant, honest and amusing exposure of the judgement that so cripples us all, thank you Fumiyo. As we are each made of the same stuff – love – we are naturally discerning creatures in the sense that if we know love, then we know the moment something enters our field that is not of this vibration. However, enter judgement and that which we would so normally discern (by reading the energy at play) is clouded by an impost that is fed into us from consciousness that says ‘we’ must be better than ‘them’, and thus the age old separatism of the human race continues to divide a group of beings that in-truth only know how to move as One.

  11. I smiled to myself Fumiyo as I remembered ‘the only gay in the village’ series. I loved the learnings you took from it, thank you for sharing them with us. Taking responsibility for discerning and not judging and loving all equally is such a powerful teaching.

  12. No coincidence I come across this blog today after (eventually) understanding that I am choosing judgement rather than a victim of it. I judge myself for holding back and say that I can’t be me because I’ll be alone and no one will understand me because they are not the same. But we may not be the same based on our life choices and behaviours, even in myself I can feel when my movements don’t match my essence. But I am feeling how none of that matters when I choose to be the love that I am.

  13. I remember pondering on the struggle of being the only student of the Livingness in HK, and constantly wonder there must be some investment for myself if this is a reality for me, which immediately the truth exposed itself in front of me saying–you are freaking out there because to do this together with someone means you have to surrender even deeper into love, because what is freaking you out is that unity is the future unfolding and individuality is being challenged. I remember sitting with this feeling and really feeling it. I didn’t think further, but allowed my body to guide me and deepened my love with every person around. What I initially felt challenged in regards to life then touched me with the power of surrender I haven’t experienced before. Life does not have to be a struggle, it can be simple, and with that I held everyone around me with the same love that I know I can be, and then what I felt was power, the power of everyone–as what has come back in response when love is deepened, is the equal love that has been expressed. I am certainly not the only one, and the picture and label of a student has expanded much more for me.

  14. OMG! I’m the “only gay in the village”! I remember the sketch you refer to Fumiyo – hilarious, and so deeply exposing of any part of us that identifies ourselves as ‘different’ and makes a drama out of the world not understanding who we are… (a very comfortable stance to take, for in it, we go nowhere…)
    Love that you have taken this to such a point of self-responsibility here, i.e. that well, IF we want the world to understand us and ‘be the love we want to see’, it’s up to us to:
    1. Recognise that we are all, essentially the same within (and simply choosing different levels of awareness to the fact); and
    2. Let people into US – don’t withhold our love because it’s not met back in kind…
    Oo, that’s a big one for most if not all of us – and where so much mastery actually lies, isn’t it…

  15. An oxymoron indeed! But one that most of us live day in day out, as not many people I know are able to live in a truly selfless way. No judgement : ) but simply an observation. The more we are able to be with ourselves and be loving with ourselves especially in our mistakes etc the more we are going to be able to love others and live brotherhood.

  16. Beautifully exposed Fumiyo. Any judgment, comparison or ‘us and them’ mentality is not true as we are all one and the same. It is only our choices, which can change in a moment that make us appear different. And while we sit in any judgment we are in exactly the same mess that everyone else is in , just arrogantly thinking we are not. I find I tend to focus on other people when I don’t want to look at a lack of love in me.

  17. Definitely Fumiyo judgement is not the way forward! I can easily judge and fall into that trap of looking for problems rather than simply discerning energy and accepting with no criticism or judgement the choice of energetic alignment. I know that this judgement comes from a harsh inner judgement for my own non loving choices. What is really needed is to up the love for ourselves and then it is easy to love others no matter their choices. Love doesn’t mean being soppy and accepting abuse but rather holding and accepting someone as they are choosing to be knowing first and foremost that they are divine.

    1. Thank you for this Vanessa, if there are judgements then it’s a call to love ourselves and our mistakes or perceived imperfections. Makes me wonder now why I judge myself so much and what do I need to have more understanding for of my choices.

  18. Thanks for your amazing honesty Fumiyo. You have helped me feel a layer of judgment I wasn’t previously aware of.

  19. It’s without doubt to me that everybody in this world intimately feels energy, and misses the Love and grace of being who they truly are. So why do I blame them for seeking relief? Why do I hold them to ransom for not being a certain way with me? I feel Fumiyo it’s all just a big rouse to distract from the fact that it is my role, job and responsibility to bring this Love back. When we all do this for ourselves we can easily extend it to the rest of the global village too.

  20. I find your lightness and openness super inspiring Fumiyo. This is what makes a true student of life a true student of life! We all make mistakes and it is this honesty that is foundational to our inner growth

  21. It is great to feel the playfulness in this blog, dealing with a subject that many of us would be familiar with but, not always be willing to expose, whether Esoteric student or not, we can often go into judgement to bolster our positions and to not have to deal with something in our own behaviours that could heal…So powerful to expose this and be honest and light about it.

    1. I agree Samantha. This reminds me that nobody evolves when we get serious and start condemning ourselves or others.

  22. What if being Esoteric is a natural phenomenon, why then would we not go about our every day expressing our Esoteric ways fully, simply because we know we are the Sons of God, and we know everyone we meet is also an equal Son of God, and there are no bells or whistles in being Esoteric, there is nothing special to it, it is just simply an every day affair breathing and living from the depth of our hearts.

  23. Such a great read thank you Fumiyo. I can recognise myself in the looking for faults in others to feel better or assured in myself of living true – as they ‘are obviously not’! The arrogance! It is a smart way of keeping people out I have found. Because in the end we are all the same and do we not want love and share this?

  24. Having a self imposed view of ourselves can be one of the most difficult patterns to breakaway from. After all the only things you are fighting against are the choices you have made.

  25. It is only through our own acceptance that we understand that which we judge in another is also passing through us, the only difference is that we are choosing differently and it is our responsibility to reflect truth and inspiration to another.

  26. Such a beautiful sharing Fumiyo. There is no doubt judgement of ourselves and others is debilitating and harming to all concerned.

  27. When we see the divine essence that is truly there in each other, hidden or not, we can realise the great reflections and teachers we all are for each other – in many ways.

  28. I feel that many are guilty of judging others choices as loveless when they themselves are guilty of being disconnected and holding back the love they are… for in the connection judgment is impossible for only understanding can be felt. A great article to expose how we can separate ourselves at our own expense.

  29. The power of appreciation cannot be underestimated. When we appreciate ourselves in full, the love we are, we have no need to compare or judge another, for we then understand and know that there can be no ‘only ones’ as the love we are within is equal in all.

  30. ‘…I don’t allow and honour my own feelings fully, so this leaves an opening for judgement to be formed very, very quickly.’ The truth of this statement revealed to me how important it is to never dismiss my feelings because they are always related to what has come up to be healed. A great blog and so relatable Fumiyo.

  31. Fumiyo what a beautiful piece of honest writing that can be reflective of the way so many people live today, I know I would have huge amounts of judgement over people and yet this often came from my lack of loving and looking after myself.

  32. Ah you have struck a very familiar chord here Fumiyo – we often think that only a rare few of us are in tune with the symphony of life when the truth is we are all part of it equally.

  33. Humorous Fumiyo I had so much fun to read your honest blog. For me humor and the ability to laugh about myself are very good and simple tools to connect back to the love that I am. Therefore I really much appreciate it that you have chose to share your wonderful experience with all of us – it is such a good reminder.

  34. Such good insight into judgment Fumiyo and why we do it. I had not fully appreciated that when we don’t honour our own feelings fully it leaves an opening for judgement to be formed.
    I love how you have brought greater understanding to this and spelt it out for us all to see.

  35. I find when I am being overly picky or judging another it is because I don’t want to look at how I am living. For me stopping and looking at why am I behaving like that, or talking with someone honestly, helps me to see my part in it and where I have been judging or rejecting myself.

  36. I had to step down from having judgements and living in a very critical way with others and with myself. And it is such a joy to share the love I feel inside and to open my eyes and heart for the people I meet in my life. I do hold back though when I make it about me and close my eyes for what is there to truly see and feel…and to appreciate.

  37. I love what you’ve shared here Fumiyo, and I have recently come to see far more ‘evidence’ of the esoteric nature in everyone I meet. I have always been so fixated on what was ‘not esoteric’ about others that I missed seeing how much was actually spot on and true in them. Judgement was definitely my mode, and still often creeps in… but I now recognise it much faster and put a stop to it’s insidiously undermining ways.

  38. It is so true Fumiyo that appreciating ourselves and the love we are within first, is what build a loving and honoring foundation whereby we need not look to judge another to make ourselves feel better or greater as we know that in this Love we are all equal, and the quality of Love reflected through another is known and felt as such, a blessing.

  39. Loved your honesty Fumiyo, and the very clear example of the TV show. We can use anything to compare ourselves against another… even the esoteric. I’m realising that whenever I’m isolating myself, think everyone is against me or I am the only one, I know this is a part of me that I’m isolating and not appreciating therefore not being able to see the magnificence or reflection in another.

  40. So very exposing Fumiyo, I loved it, it exposed in me where I still slip up by shutting the one thing we are all from out, love.

  41. It’s a pitfall I am aware I have fallen into, judgement and critique. I now am aware of the key ingredient being self love which holds everyone equally, and observe and read the choices being made and knowing this does not alter the fact that we are all from the one.

  42. Ahahah Fumiyo I had so much fun to read your awesome blog! You made it very obvious that the only way to be is to take responsibility for what we are doing and thinking.

  43. Brilliantly said Fumiyo. The minute we make ourselves better than or less than another, we have separation….and absolutely nothing can grow from that because it simply is not the truth.

  44. Being myself, and as much as I can muster being the love that I am equally with everyone is what life is now about thanks to Universal Medicine.

  45. This is a brutally honest and funny piece of writing. It is quite fascinating (and hard at times) to see what is at play and how we actually are with others and what we are doing. I love that you share this with us all so we can in turn have an opportunity to reflect on our lives and see what is play out there.

    This line really stood out for me “Once there’s an opening, love starts leaking and what’s not love is so fast to take charge and make the whole thing so complicated and emotionally charged.”…this can happen at lightening speed. And a good way to know if it has happened if things are getting complicated and emotionally charged.

  46. Judgement is poison – but I detect it in myself really quickly these days. Bringing understanding – and love – to the equation transforms it. So true what Serge Benhayon has presented – appreciation is a key to ending comparison and also jealousy.

  47. You have outlined one of the greatest potential pitfalls of being an Esoteric student Fumiyo… to apply the teachings and principles as a set of rules to follow, as desirable and right ways of living life, leaves us open to the likelihood of judging both ourselves and others around us by these measures. There is no other way than to live the Ancient Wisdom teachings for ourselves, and to allow others to make their own choices as they feel to in their own lives.

  48. ‘ I don’t allow and honour my own feelings fully,’ This is a great realisation. Most of us do not allow ourselves the space to do this but when we do we find our way to a deeper relationship with ourselves and find that old ways of being get exposed and we can then choose to drop these in favour of a way of being that support us to feel more and more clearly.

  49. Fumiyo, super honest and very discerning! I love the sketch you speak of and can see how much it applies when I play my own version of it, be it the only ‘esoteric’, ‘woman’, etc. etc. – in other words any label I choose as a way of being to keep another out. The truth is, if at any stage I am doing something without being fully me, and feeling disconnected, then everything I see and feel in the world is separate, and I judge it in some way or form. We are all one brotherhood and so how can any one be more this or the only that, yes at times we may live and act in a way which does not express this brotherhood and love, but it is always there. The other thing that stands out in what you’ve shared is that it starts with us, so if as you say we do not fully own and feel our own feelings, if we dismiss them, we give a space or a window for love to leak (great image), and we set ourselves and the world up to be less. Thank you, it’s been so supportive to read this today.

  50. Very revealing Fumiyo. When we look to see what we think people are not we miss out on the natural beauty of who they are.

  51. I love the way you express Fumiyo! You share with such lightness, openness and honesty. How funny it is that we play the victim game believing we are all alone (an feeling miserable as a result) when the whole world is ready to connect with us.

  52. Knowing the show you take the title of the blog from, I really enjoyed where you took this saying and how it opens up a whole consciousness about the choices we make and how we project them onto others, all to keep our individual identity, rather than choose harmony and the joy that true connection to other people brings.

  53. How can we possible know who everybody truly is when we all put on a show? Thank you Fumiyo for dropping the act and for seeing through the games we are playing.

  54. I love how you saw the truth of the situation. As you say the moment we separate ourselves as being the “only” one” then we are being anything but esoteric.

  55. Fumiyo this is a great subject to expose. It is an area that I too have been bringing to my awareness. The difference between discernment and Judgement? For me discernment is allowing all to be, including myself with understanding and equal love. Judgement is righteously exclusive and has no room for any depth . Judgement is seeded from some level of self- lacking in some way.

  56. “I felt as if I was looking for an evidence, a clue to form a judgement…”
    How often do we hold a picture inside of us, an idea how we perceive things to be and then look out to find the evidence, as if we need to prove it to ourselves as being true. Approaching life like this we miss out on so much that is there to be revealed to us. When we can find back to a way of true wonderment we have gained much.

  57. Such an honest sharing Fumiyo. I think we’ve all been partial to judgment at several times in our lives. I know I have to catch myself out constantly. It’s a funny thing how hard we are on ourselves and others. Serves no purpose at all but to separate us from eachother.

  58. Such fun to read this today Fumiyo. As I know the character you are talking about ‘the only gay in the village’ I could easily see the parallels here. Beautiful how a TV sketch can nudge our awareness and understanding.

  59. Gorgeous blog Fumiyo. Judgement has been something that has been coming up for me a lot recently and I’m realising how toxic and insidious it is. It is a very effective way for me to keep humanity out. When I bring in understanding I have no judgment. Understanding actually comes easily to me so I know it is a choice I am making and that it serves me in some way.

  60. Such a beautifully honest blog Fumiyo, and one that asked me to reflect upon the areas I may use judgement when discernment would be the more loving choice, allowing understanding and an opportunity to evolve.

  61. How absurd could it be that you could get a star that turns itself against the rest of the night sky? How strange would it be to see a flower delicately sprout up but then take pleasure in another plants decay? and yet we turn against each other here, thinking that we are greater, better or different. We live divided even in our own body, kept apart from breathing and knowing the whole truth of me and you – that we are one in the Love and place we originally come from. Thank you from me to you for returning to the truth Fumiyo.

  62. Love your blog Fumiyo, it reminds me when I have felt unconfident and insecure it is easy to make judgement on others, when I am with the real me I see first the love in everyone. This is quite a difference – one choice condemns and puts down when the other acknowledges we are all the same. One evolves us the other harms us.

    1. This is so true samanthaengland, it all depends on how connected and settled we are with ourselves to start with. When we relate to another in the fullness of the love that we also see love in them first and hold them as such. Only when we are separated from our own essence do we end up judging ourselves or other people.

  63. Our whole way in life has been formulated from seeing ourselves as ‘separate from’, divided, apart and ultimately at the end, isolated at heart. This is not just far from the truth but the complete opposite of who we really are. Your words Fumiyo illustrate how we are put all together in this life, in the most beautiful way so we come to see the only ‘one’ that is true is one humanity, one family and that is me and you. The idea we are not somehow the same beyond the race, nation and name is one of the biggest lies humankind has ever let run.

  64. So many of us hold the world to ransom because at some point our love has not been recognised or acknowledged. So, understandable that we do this ,but in its own way is ultimately irresponsible, for it then assists to create a world that is based on protection.

  65. Until we start to know ourselves from the inner heart out, we cannot help but be pushed in all directions by the winds of judgement and reaction that are deeply embedded in all of us.

  66. What we may have been doing, especially if very successful in life, is to try the same formula in trying to be esoteric. We may very good at convincing others, yet deep within we can never fool ourselves, yet the tendency to impose on others our point of view or judgment, is giving it a pretty good try!

  67. Wow Fumiyo – how common is it for us to think of ourselves as just a little ‘different’ to others? Yes there is no one quite like us in our particular flavour, but underneath and inside all of this is the simple fact we are all equal brothers. Seeing and living anything less than this equality of essence is just not true.

  68. Fumiyo, it is so heartening to feel how we are all connected to truth even when we pretend not to be. Is this perhaps the actual truth about our hurts and why we hold on to them – because they separate us from others and keep us in the illusion that we are the only one? When we have to hold an identity, of course we cannot be esoteric, because in our innermost, we are all one.

  69. This was great to read Fumiyo and ‘judging’ by the comments 🙂 you are not alone. We humans can be so ridiculous sometimes, each one of us thinking we are alone or ‘the only one’ when that can never be as we are all connected and feel the judgements and separative thinking all the time. We also feel love and only need to support ourselves to connect to the gloriousness of that, allow ourselves to accept and be inspired by it in others knowing it is equally there within ourselves.

  70. Love this Fumiyo and can really relate to the arrogance of the ‘only Eso in the village’ feeling that I have hidden behind and chosen to feel sorry for myself for the lack of support when all along it was me who was not supporting myself and keeping myself separate and in judgement of everyone else. Thank you I how have a great/playful image to bring me back to Love.

    1. I love this blog too Helen, it is brilliant, so honest, playful and so true. What a great reminder for us to always connect to love no matter where we are, if we choose separation, exclusivity, judgement and anything less than love we are ultimately choosing to separate ourselves from love, from people and from God.

  71. Yes Fumiyo what if “the world could be full of equally beautiful people, just like me”? If we know it is so surely we would live feeling our true equality, no better no worse, free from judgement and this odd way of intentional choosing to see the world in reverse.

  72. “The old beliefs, the judgements – do not stand a chance against the True Love.” True love is something that cannot be altered as it is within us all forevermore. When we connect to this love we connect to all equally so.

  73. Such a beautifully honest and playful sharing Fumiyo, I know at times when I have judged others it feels uncomfortable in my body and stops the true expression of love.

  74. What a powerful question; do I discern, or do I judge?
    Fumiyo I just love the way you have expressed in this blog, incorporating truth, playfulness, self awareness, responsibility and analogy, to name but a few.
    I smiled to myself as I recalled The Only Gay in the Village, a very pertinent reflection for us all.

  75. Thank you Fumiyo for such an insightful reflection that is of classic value for me and for everyone. This line struck me. ‘Once there’s an opening, love starts leaking and what’s not love is so fast to take charge and make the whole thing so complicated and emotionally charged.’ The complication and emotion spirals into an abyss if not caught and arrested immediately. Loved reading this again and a great confirmation for my day!

  76. I like the truth that your blog presents Fumiyo, I know that I have allowed judgement to interfere with with my expression

  77. I re read your blog today and it is true when I not honour or trust my feelings it is so easy to judge another person and the after effect is like you say is judging myself. Humour is very powerful and is able to turn this around and it gives an honest and open look on what is truly happening and with that we can start to be responsible without any heaviness what so ever.

  78. This is a beauty Fumiyo, I bet a lot of us, or even most of us could admit that judgement has got in the way of us just being the love that we are. A lovely, playful and honest account spelled out with wisdom.

  79. Thank you Fumiyo for so honestly sharing your experience. I love how humour can change something that can be heavy and bring a sense of lightness, giving space for change. Wise words – “I don’t allow and honour my own feelings fully, so this leaves an opening for judgement to be formed very, very quickly – about the subject, and also about myself for making that judgement itself. Once there’s an opening, love starts leaking and what’s not love is so fast to take charge and make the whole thing so complicated and emotionally charged.”

  80. indeed… The foundation of true love and the abiding connection with ourselves that comes from this reconnection is the essential foundation for committing to a true and honest life that does actually evolve.

  81. A very honest blog written in a playful way and one I can relate to; ‘I was desperately looking for that missing part – love – knowing it could not be found outside myself, yet I kept looking out, until I convinced myself that the world had let me down.’ Yes blaming the world and getting frustrated and judgemental that was definitely what I did. But like you say ‘The old beliefs, the judgements – do not stand a chance against the True Love’

  82. I love your honesty Fumiyo and I can really relate to what you’ve written and the world of difference there is between discernment and that horrible judgemental and self righteous way of being. Or another possibly even more deceptive way is leaving us feeling less than or more than another and it’s called comparison. Neither of these ways come from love, for love accepts everyone equally, knowing that the essence of love resides deep within us all, barring none, and respects the choices we make whether we choose to be love or not.

  83. Thank you Fumiyo for sharing your experience, and sense of humour, you pose a good question for me to ask am I discerning or am I judging when I comment on any situation.

  84. This sharing really made me smile as I recognise so much of what you share Fumiyo especially the part of judging others. Humour lightens up the seriousness of many situations we find ourselves in – especially when we give ourselves such a hard time before we truly honour our own feelings fully first.

  85. “A very similar belief actually came up during my session with an Esoteric practitioner a long time ago, and I thought I had got over it.” We ‘think’ we have sorted it only to realise that we didn’t replace it with a true living way coming from our understanding of why we develop a belief in the first place.

  86. Love your honesty Fumiyo and your ability to look at yourself in a humorous way. I can so relate to how we can see ourselves as the ‘only esoteric in the village” when we let arrogance judgement and criticism rule our thoughts.

  87. It’s great Fumiyo that you could have a chuckle at yourself and realise what you were doing. Sometimes it can be that we’re actually shutting others out when we think it’s them – I know this is true for me – complaining that there’s no one there but they’re all actually standing right in front of me ready to connect. And what you say is true – if there’s no self love there can only be judgment. It’s vital to accepting ourselves and others as they are.

  88. Fumiyo I loved reading your blog, jealously is very divisive, it can destroy families and friendships. When we are able to be ourselves, know and hold the love that we are, we are able to feel that love in another, and accept ourselves and others for who they are.

  89. I loved this line, Fumiyo – ‘Once there’s an opening, love starts leaking and what’s not love is so fast to take charge and make the whole thing so complicated and emotionally charged.’ This is indeed the bane of life and requires us to discover our openings so we can heal what will allow them to close, ensuring that love doesn’t leak out and get rapidly replaced by something other than love which then wreaks havoc on the way we view the world.

    1. True Cathy, the leaking of love as Fumiyo describes here is a perfect description of the way in which we can choose to be less than we know ourselves to be, less than what we are made to reflect and to share. We all miss out when this occurs and indeed havoc develops. Makes me realise more fully how self responsibility is the key here.

    2. Yes I loved this line too Cathy – it’s a great visual to help with looking at our openings and repairing them so that we can avoid the havoc that is created when we have a love leakage.

  90. This is classic love it, although very funny so true if we don’t start with love firstly you have nothing to stand on

    1. I agree Jaime this blog is so funny yet so honest and exposing. I love reading it and the comments too. I love the lessons in all that is shared, so relatable and inspiring.

  91. ‘I don’t allow and honour my own feelings fully, so this leaves an opening for judgement to be formed very, very quickly – about the subject, and also about myself for making that judgement itself’. Well said Fumiyo…. what you have expressed here and the way that you exposed the pattern of judgement is gold. Feeling of being judged do come from our judgement towards ourselves.

    1. Yes Katie! I have fallen into these traps often, not taking the time to appreciate that I have read a situation correctly in the first place and instead going down the track that Fumiyo has described. Coming to this realisation has been a big revelation.

  92. Hilarious Fumiyo…and also not! How much we love to feel that we are the ‘only’ one. Oh! the suffering and the misery! The virtue of struggling by ourselves! We become the hero in our own tale of woe – minus the mesh and lycra outfits.
    I love the way you have recognised your part in this, and that being the “only esoteric in the village” is not esoteric at all. This is a beautiful lesson for all.

    1. Yes Rachel, this is a beautiful lesson for me too. It never feels true to create this false sense of ‘better than’ feeling toward another person. Exclusivity is a lonely place to be, shutting people out hurts ourselves and everyone around us.

  93. I enjoyed how you weaved the sketch so well into your own personal realisation – there is alot of value and philosophy in humour. For me, I’ve certainly felt this judgement myself, and what makes the difference is when I take a moment to apply understanding to other peoples choices. That brings a whole different perspective, and lets the love out in full.

    1. Yes Simonwilliams8, by letting the love out in full helps us eliminate judgment and jealousy. Once we are expressing love in full there is no room for anything else, just pure love.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s