Cleaning Up My Mess – True Self Care or Keeping Up Appearances?

I’m sure most people would list living in a clean and orderly environment as being high on their list of self-care priorities. After all, living in a messy environment is not nurturing or supportive for anyone. For quite some time now I’ve been pondering whether the way I clean my surroundings is truly caring and supportive, or pure function carried out only for the sake of keeping up appearances.

When I create mess and disorganisation, I know it is a reflection of the relationship I have with life and the relationship I have with myself. At times I have found myself heaping harsh judgement on others when I clock the mess they live in, and I’ve certainly harshly judged myself too. Continue reading “Cleaning Up My Mess – True Self Care or Keeping Up Appearances?”

Ring On My Finger

Could it be that we have parts of our body that we have not fully claimed or loved? And if so, how does this affect us either consciously or subconsciously? This was something I clearly felt during my routine one morning regarding one of my fingers, whilst feeling what rings to wear and what fingers to put them on: that on some level, energetically, I felt a finger was not mine! Confused? I will explain. Continue reading “Ring On My Finger”

Learning to be in Relationship without Pictures

The mental pictures that we hold onto, if they are not expressed openly, clearly and respectfully, seem to be one of the causes of conflict in the world.

Recently I went on a trip with my son. The picture I carried was we would enjoy common time together, while the picture that he carried was he would enjoy his time and do whatever he felt like doing. He is twelve and at the age that he feels compelled to make his own choices. Continue reading “Learning to be in Relationship without Pictures”

The Strength and Power of Connection

All of my life I have felt moments when my connection to me was so strong that it allowed me to make choices that were significant markers in my life.

Once I was offered drugs at a party when I was about 15. I clearly remember stopping and standing there and thinking that I don’t smoke so why would I want to smoke marijuana. It felt like I was being offered a moment to stop. It wasn’t just about having a smoke or taking drugs, it was far greater… it was about making a choice that would affect the rest of my life. I was never offered drugs again.

These moments that occur in our lives are like signposts along the way. We are given an opportunity to make choices that have the potential to change our lives forever. Continue reading “The Strength and Power of Connection”

Our Bodies Hold the Key to the Truth of Who We Are

Recently my sister sent me a photo of her and I as kids. I had not seen this photo before and when I looked at it, something about it made me come to an abrupt halt. What struck me so forcibly was seeing how naturally loose and relaxed our bodies were. There is an exquisite lightness and natural ease that seems to flow through both of us. Continue reading “Our Bodies Hold the Key to the Truth of Who We Are”

The Devil in the Detail

Recently life has been asking me to look more closely at what I do and how I am.

It is calling out for me to pay more attention to the detail – for example; not just what I write, but how I am when I write, not just what I eat, but how I am when I eat, not just what I do in any given moment, but how I am when doing this. Continue reading “The Devil in the Detail”

Seeking Connection in Techno Parties

Recently I had the chance to re-visit a scenario that for a few years was my normal. I went to a techno party with a couple of friends who were visiting from abroad; one of them was DJ-ing for a couple of hours. Continue reading “Seeking Connection in Techno Parties”

“Beauty is Much More Than Skin Deep”

We are all beautiful. This is not an advertising jargon or a casual clichéd comment, but it is an absolute truth that my body knows.  But what is beauty? Continue reading ““Beauty is Much More Than Skin Deep””

A Home without Compromise

Over the years, I have certainly compromised my own feelings – for others, for situations, to fit in or be liked – but whatever the reason, it was a choice made to settle for less than what felt right for me and honouring of me, overriding what felt loving, supportive and settling for whatever amount of love I thought I deserved at the time, an amount always measured by my own measure of self-worth. But when I am full of self-worth, when I know how beautiful I really am and there is absolutely nothing to be measured, then the love I can hold myself and others in and even my home, is immeasurable and without compromise. Continue reading “A Home without Compromise”

Loving Myself and My Choices

When I began to allow in the possibility that there might, after all, be something in all this loving myself stuff, I began to notice more and more parts of my life that weren’t in tune with the real me, hidden away under all those layers. But the more I noticed, the more tender, raw and exposed I felt. I started to feel so uncomfortable with the way I’d been living as not myself, but I had no idea what to do about it. Nurturing myself, being more loving, and more consistent, sounded great in principle but so far away that I couldn’t understand what practical steps I needed to take to get back to being and loving myself again. Continue reading “Loving Myself and My Choices”