I was flicking through some old pictures of myself recently, and after laughing at all my different hairstyles and hair colours, the fashions and my fluctuations in weight, something quite profound struck me… even though I was smiling in the majority of the photos, I wasn’t actually really smiling!!
My mouth was turning up at the corners yet my teeth were gritted together, my eyes appeared painfully sad, and my body was held rigid and hard – almost like a soldier standing to attention. The person in the picture could barely look at the camera and there was something about the pose that was aggressively defensive – if that makes sense. It was like I was saying: “back off buddy, I don’t want you to see me for who I really am”, or “please don’t notice how sad and lost I feel inside”.
PICTURES OF ME – AS A CHILD – WHERE DID I GO?
After this observation I dug out photos of when I was a little girl. I was curious – did I carry that sad look and defensive pose back then, and if so, could I pinpoint when it started?
There are not many pictures of me as a child – my family was not very well off and back then getting a roll of film developed was a luxurious expense. There are a couple of pictures of me as a toddler and around the age of 3-4yrs. In these I can see a naturalness in the way my body holds itself and a loving tenderness in my eyes; there is deep joy and a cheeky playfulness in my smile.
Pictures of me from around 6 through to 10yrs show the beginning of a shyness in my gaze and some tension in the way I hold my body. My mouth turns up in a smile but my eyes have a hint of sadness within them, and not the cheeky joy of the younger me.
And… well, the shots from my teenage years show defiance, aggression and sadness all rolled into one, even in the photos where I am being goofy and clowning around. There are a few flashes of that cute little girl whose smile and eyes beam with joy when I didn’t realise I was being watched and captured by the camera lens.
So where did that little girl who knew herself to be beautiful go, and why did I try to hide her?
In a world that is difficult and tough, and where love and gentleness are not celebrated as they ought to be, a child learns to please and give their parents, teachers, friends and relatives what they think is required. We change our ways and alter who we are to fit in, be accepted, get the pat on the back, or to simply disappear and blend into the background.
This not being who we are but being who we think we should be, hurts us as it goes against our innermost nature.
For me it meant my whole way of being became aggressive and driven – but looking at the pictures of me, the sadness in my eyes clearly showed.
PICTURES OF ME – NOW – AS A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN
A couple of months ago I had a professional photographer come to my dental practice to do a shoot of my team and myself for our new website.
Instead of it being a stuffy and formal affair with the photographer telling us where to stand, how to pose and so forth, it was actually one of the most fun and enjoyable things I have experienced. Everybody was able to relax and just be themselves very quickly; most shots were taken of us simply doing our thing, role playing, working together in the dental office. I don’t think I have laughed so much in ages; I forgot the camera was even there most of the time.
This energy of ease and fun along with the love, care and tenderness of my team and myself was beautifully captured in the proof photographs that came back. As I looked through the shots I was deeply moved by the incredible work of the photographer, but also by the beauty of the people (us) in the images I was seeing.
Then one photo stopped me dead in my tracks, I think I actually gasped. It is of a tender, loving, beautiful woman who is not smiling with her mouth but with her eyes and all her heart… allowing you to see deep inside of her to the very essence of who she is, an essence that is pure love.
And as I looked at myself looking back at me, I wept with pure joy knowing that I no longer had to hide who I am, that I had come home to myself.
I was looking at a true picture of me.
Thank you to Serge Benhayon and all at Universal Medicine for allowing the real Rachel Hall to come out from behind her defensive walls.
By Dr Rachel Hall, Holistic Dentist, Brisbane
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The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
I loved reading this sharing, it’s as if you were kind of writing about me too. I don’t have many photos of me as a child too, but the photos I do have as I was growing up were similar to yours, hardness and sadness.
Photos don’t lie but most of all, when we look into a person’s eyes, and the way they present, tells many things about them and the sadness they carry too. We spend lifetimes pretzeling ourselves to be something we are not, and that really hurts us to the core. Its a no wonder there is so much unrest in the world, whether it’s mental illness or dis-ease, its there all around us.
It’s only when we meet people like Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine that our lives can be lived from a different place. It’s not lectured, it is simply presented and within ourselves we will feel whether it is true for us or not. My life has never been the same since meeting Serge, in that I started to let go of the many things that were never truly me. It is a working progress and there is more to go without being hard on my self. But I can honestly say I feel I am truly returning home again, a place I feel more at ease now.
We can see and feel so much from photographs, ‘And as I looked at myself looking back at me, I wept with pure joy knowing that I no longer had to hide who I am, that I had come home to myself.’
I agree Lorraine, photos don’t lie. It’s only when we begin to know ourselves that we see these revelations more and more. A great antidote to the lies we are continually living.
Transformational as you have shared Rachel the 44 year old has the tender glow of the 3 year old so if my math’s is correct 41 years to reconnect, which is great considering most of us stay stuck in the lesser self for life times.
When someone is in the world, being full of themselves for everyone to see and feel, what gets captured in an image is worlds apart from those that saturate our social media with desperation of ‘Like me, like me.’
I can relate to,your story Rachel of there being a beauty, cheekiness, aliveness and joy to myself as a child then a shift into sadness, protection and hardness in later childhood. Returning to myself requires much dedication as there has been and still is a lot to let go of, but wow, it is so worth it. This is what we miss most in the world – ourselves.
We lose who we truly are as we try to navigate the world, and be what we think people want us to be. Hardness, protection and defensiveness replaced the innocence, sweetness and playfulness that I naturally exuded as a child. Returning to my essence, who I truly am is an on-going letting go of what is not the true me.
Wow thank you for sharing the changes in your life, and how by going into protection as a child it set you up to become defensive as we can so easily see in the photograph when you were 30, and the after photo at 40 such a huge shift, your whole body language has changed and you now radiate such natural beauty to the world. Amazing!
In my purely hiding days I’d only get a picture taken if wearing war paint or a really cool cosplay outfit. Nor would I want to look in a mirror unless dressing up. These days I love my elevator in my flat as it has a huge mirror. It gives away how I feel inside and I love looking into my eyes.
As you become more aware, you can see whether the eyes and mouth belongs to/transpires the spirit or the Soul. A world apart.
When we truly allow ourselves to be seen, the universe is there in our eyes.
Rachel, what I find so beautiful and confirming is how I actually began to cry when I saw that last photo of you (the tender loving me one) before I even read what you shared about how it was the true picture of you. To me this shows how we all can feel the truth of everything we perceive and how inspiring it can be to see another shine their light so fully as you are now.
It’s absolutely beautiful – just being yourself and having that moment captured in a photo, and you find the beauty and love beyond what you have allowed yourselves to think you are. We really are much more than what we think we are.
Your before and after photos are so different Rachel, it is clear you are embracing and accepting your beautiful and tender qualities now without needing to protect yourself in anyway.
A great reminder Rachel that when we ‘soldier on’ through life there is a hardness and a rigidity to how we move and speak that totally compromises us living our heartfelt potential.
Faces that smile but bodies that do not. This is the reality we face everyday.
What a miracle it is that we can look at pictures of ourselves now, and feel the grace and beauty that is there looking back at us… Without looking for it… We have found the best skin restorer on the planet 🙂
That’s beautiful Rachel, a “true picture” of you. What a journey starting out in our naturalness as children, getting pulled away from that at some stage into defensiveness, sadness, hardness, emotions, etc, to then find Serge Benhayon and experience the joy of return to our true selves again.
“as I looked at myself looking back at me, I wept with pure joy knowing that I no longer had to hide who I am, that I had come home to myself.” My whole body smiled as I read these words.
Pictures can help reveal a lot to us as can video and audio recordings. Essentially they are mirrors of self-reflection and can offer a lot of insight when we look at them without judgement but with curiosity.
Thank you for sharing this Rachel, this is super beautiful.
Beautiful Rachel, the picture says it all, a deeply tender woman just being her for all the world to see.
A smile that comes from the whole body has the power to melt the one who is being smiled at. It is a true reflection of the natural beauty that we all hold within and when smiled forth brings with it the love and the joy that are inherently a part of the essence of who we truly are.
What a change! Most of us tend to smile as part of covering up our insecurities that life is not what we know it ought to be. It is only ever when one smiles from absolute and pure content-ness and love within themselves that we really start to see the beauty shine!
Photos are great markers for us and I know the author personally but have never seen these photos. How telling are they? and how easy is it to see the massive massive changes in them. It’s true testament to the changes and choices that have been made. The photo in the 30’s is a little scary in a way and looks robotic and yet the later one is so so warm, it’s great the author is a dentist as well and I know which smile I’d rather see looking down at me.
When I look in the mirror today my perception of myself has changed. This is due to the fact how more open I am with my feelings and not shutdown. If I see myself as ugly this is what I am projecting out or towards myself. Better still is I can have this with anyone by receiving their reflection – an image in time. All my continuous choices are reflected in my body. So, I’m better off connecting and being honest with myself and my body to all that I’m feeling and know and accept that as my choice.
I was sorting through and getting rid of old photos yesterday, quite revealing of what energies we go into during different times of our life. Your photos reflect a beautiful transformation Rachel.
The photos of you do feel very different, and yes the last photo feels very gorgeous.
I can see and feel the beautiful tender woman that has been captured in the recent photos of you, and also through the words of your blog.
There is such power in a photograph where what is truth comes through in vision and in emanation. Very beautiful to see and to feel, more pictures please Rachel.
I can’t keep my eyes off your last photo, it’s a photo of a women emanating the love of God.
Rachel you are a shining example of a woman who has embraced her love, beauty and tenderness and is now sharing this in the world for all to feel and be inspired by.
Thank you Rachel, we can learn a lot by looking at photos of ourselves. I love to see how with yourself and in your body you were as a child and although you lost that you have come back now with a maturity and grace that cannot be denied.
That life is a journey there is no doubt. That the journey does not necessarily lead us to higher grounds is also an established fact. This blog makes clear that pictures are the best instruments to help us reflect upon our journey. They capture not just a face, a situation. What they capture is our everything; our relationship with our potential.
A history in pictures and how much we can learn from it. It takes a lot of honesty and willingness to see, thank you for your observation Rachel.
From seeing you in person and on stage presenting, your smile, how you talk and move holds a joy, humbleness and love that spills out for all to feel and see. How awesome for all that you have taken down any walls there once were in front of you.
This sentence resonated deeply with me Rachel – having been a master pleaser from childhood and bending myself into various ways to meet the expectations of others and what I thought was needed in order to feel acceptable, reminds me to appreciate just how much my way of being has changed since attending presentations by Serge Benhayon and feeling met in full by this humble man, with not an iota of expectation in sight.
“…a child learns to please and give their parents, teachers, friends and relatives what they think is required. We change our ways and alter who we are to fit in, be accepted, get the pat on the back, or to simply disappear and blend into the background”.
“We change our ways and alter who we are to fit in, be accepted, get the pat on the back, or to simply disappear and blend into the background.” It is quite extraordinary when you really stop and think that the majority of us have learned to behave in this manner yet it is not our natural way of being.
A delight to read Rachel… I love the awareness and observations you had of how we can mold ourselves into who we think we should be rather than expressing the innate gorgeousness we are. How truly beautiful that you can now embrace all of you… allowing it to radiate out for all to see.
Awesome blog Rachel, thank you for sharing you in this…the tenderness and love that you have of yourself now shines out from the photos. What a gift and inspiration it is to others when we allow ourselves to be seen and don’t try to dull down or hide ourselves.
A story many of us can relate to. Breaking down those walls and allowing myself to be seen for all that I am is a work in progress, but what I can at least see very clearly now is that it’s crazy to be holding that back. In the past I accepted that people avoided being who they were as normal, I now prefer to address the elephant in the room and choose to see that everyone is worth shining.
Rachel, I could look at your recent photo for hours. The tender love that emanates from you is a healing in it’s self. It’s got me thinking how we all become walking clearing symbols when we live the love we are.
For most people all they see in the photos is the erosion of time and the consequences of the choices they have made… Imagine seeing love being reflected back at you… Well it looks like it’s possible ☺
I reckon thats where a lot of the ‘I don’t like my photo taken’ attitude comes from, because it’s capturing a snapshot of our choices and if those choices aren’t loving then it’s not a pretty picture.
Wow beautiful sharing Rachel. The photos say it all. I can recall a time in my life when people would say to me that I had a beautiful smile and I would be thinking but I am not smiling I am gritting my teeth! And I would find that amusing as it was a little joke I had going. I was incredible sad, so sad that I wore eye makeup to hide the sadness in my eyes. I also have Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine to thank for presenting a way that allowed me to come home to myself and understand that the sadness was me missing me so today I can also smile with all of me.
I love how photos of people can actually show them a side of themselves they’re not aware of, and that there is a beauty in them that cannot be hidden, sometimes we all need reminding.
This is beautiful Rachel. I remember a couple of years ago when I had a friend take some photos of me for my website. When she sent me “the” photo I was amazed. I didn’t know I was that beautiful and I didn’t know that was what I looked like. I kept looking at the photo and I felt so much love.
Thank God the real Rachel Hall is here, for we are all without a doubt more aware of what is going on in the world through her contributions.
Absolutely stunning Rachel – an inspiration to all!
Rachel that is truly a really wonderful transformation – your smile on the last photo is so infectious . . .
Wow Rachel – the photos of you now are breathtakingly beautiful.
Beautiful to read and view how the photos of you have changed over the years and the tenderness and your open joyful heart now shines through. Thankyou for sharing.
“In a world that is difficult and tough, and where love and gentleness are not celebrated as they ought to be, a child learns to please and give their parents, teachers, friends and relatives what they think is required. We change our ways and alter who we are to fit in, be accepted, get the pat on the back, or to simply disappear and blend into the background.” – in a sense this is part of when we give up on ourselves…And what a blessing to reclaim ourselves, to allow ourselves to reveal ourselves again! Thank you Rachel for this great reminder!
Funny how you mentioned that you are not actually smiling in the older photos – it is in effect what we could call more of a grimace that we do when we can’t smile but want to appear like we do.
My son came home after his first class photos a few years ago and he pretended to hold a camera and said to me ‘do this: show your teeth’ – he was not asking me to smile, he was asking me to show teeth for the camera. This was quite hilarious at first, but actually made me stop and feel how crazy it is that we accept grimaces in our society as replacement for a true smile.
These pictures speak far more than 1000 words. What a transformation Rachel. How revealing it is to see that we often mistake a grimace for a smile and accept sad eyes as normal (if we even notice them). The ease and joy you exude now is a marker of true beauty and each and every one of us has the capacity to express this beauty if we choose to.
Rachel, your smiling eyes say it all as you share the joy of who you are with us all.
So beautiful, so deep and so amazing to see the real you Rachel – wow, what an allowing you have come to with a playfulness and freedom oozing out with your divinity in the photos of you now so naturally “as I looked at myself looking back at me, I wept with pure joy knowing that I no longer had to hide who I am, that I had come home to myself. I was looking at a true picture of me.” So beautifully shared, thank you.
A beautiful testimony to the work presented by Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon. I can relate to the fake smile, the facade that we put on by way of protection, to keep others (everyone) out. It’s very beautiful to see the real open you in your most recent photo, not someone who is protected. A woman who knows how profoundly beautiful she is and lives it for all to see. More please.
Rachel, there are many things that you have shared with your story and photos that I can relate to. The one that is the stand out for me is that your last Photo at 44 years old has been taken at your work. We spend most of our waking time in service through our work. This is a testament that you bring this quality there. Not reserved just for special occasions or with loved ones of close friends and family. You would live this quality all the time – work, rest or play. With no holding or dimming.
This sharing is absolutely gorgeous Rachel – the beauty of beholding yourself and seeing you, not hiding from the world, not holding yourself back in front of a camera lens or otherwise is so precious. It is a healing when we get to see and feel our own beauty like you have. It is a great marker, a great reminder for ourselves to keep coming back to what we know is true and that which already lies within us. Thanks for this reminder today!
The power of a camera to never lie! The mask and tension are palpable at 30 but there’s a real lightness in your latest photo that clearly resembles the playful 3 year old you. Your transformation is truly inspiring.
Sometimes we hear stories about villages, in Tibet or possibly Japan, places where there is unusual longevity… These places are always marvelled at and studied… And yet here it seems we have an even more profound phenomenon, we are a whole group of people seem to be ageing gracefully, looking better, more healthy, contributing more to the community, in general having a much better time in life… I reckon there’s something definitely worth studying here.
Thank you Rachel for sharing these photos of you which demonstrate so clearly your homecoming to you. Truly beautiful and you are an inspiration of how possible it is to let the love out and shine through your very being whether you are smiling or not.
Thank you Rachael for a beautiful sharing, loved seeing and feeling the real you.
Amazing Rachel! I really enjoyed reading this! I often wonder too, when I look through old photos of myself why did I start to become hard, defensive and “nice” on the outside but sad on the inside? Well you said yourself perfectly because the world isn’t a nice place and we think we need to build up protection, but this is false. Thanks for showing that non protection is needed, and we can truly be ourselves! Love the photos of you!
Those latest photos are amazing Rachel. What a beautiful difference and what a beautiful woman.
I could not take my eyes off your last photo Rachel – Yes a wow! stop moment to appreciate the fullness of your natural beauty which just shines out for all to feel. In your words “I no longer had to hide who I am, that I had come home to myself” this left me speechless.
Rachel this is a beautiful blog to read, from the beautiful little girl, the defensive person hiding all she is, to the beautiful, lovely woman you are. Your words ‘Then one photo stopped me dead in my tracks, I think I actually gasped. It is of a tender, loving, beautiful woman who is not smiling with her mouth but with her eyes and all her heart…’
Rachel this was super beautiful to read. The photos of you now are stunning and my whole body relaxed as I gazed at them. It’s interesting to note the changes and defences we go through as we grow. “So where did that little girl who knew herself to be beautiful go, and why did I try to hide her?” this is an excellent question. One that most of us need to ask ourselves I think.
Wow these photos say it all Rachel, it have them lined up like that it is amazing to see the changes you have made that have transformed you into the tender, beautiful woman you are today – truly inspiring thank you.
Until we do start to know who we truly are, we are left with the construct of what we have created in this life to present to the world… Knowing that it is not working, knowing that we have to keep stimulating, boosting, numbing, just to get through the day, until we come to a stop and say no it is actually possible to know ourselves, and that this is essential to our well being
Ditto, Rachel. Few weeks ago I was looking for picture of my father and came across some of my old pictures. It was interesting and funny to look at changes in my hair style, look and as well as you I noticed that even from the picture we can feel where we are at.
But the inner light and beauty is always there no matter what.
When we connect with that inner truth inside and discover the innate beauty that is within all of us, this naturally shines out their lives and is reflected all around us, and indeed is so lovely to see in photos.
“There are a few flashes of that cute little girl whose smile and eyes beam with joy when I didn’t realise I was being watched and captured by the camera lens.” I was really intrigued by this sentence Rachel… to me it shows the natural beautiful people we are is always there, but as soon as we turn to face the world then we put our game face on and front up to the world.
How lovely to read of such a transformation, and to see the results right in front of us, and to know that this is not some fad or craze that will fade, and that Dr Rachel will become even more gorgeous as the years roll by.
There’s a loving essence that radiates out of your two practice photos from deep within, like you’ve melted. The difference evident in these compared to you in triathlete mode is palpable. You’re letting us in, no defence in sight.
What an inspiration Rachel. A most beautiful transformation. Thank you for sharing your journey.
The photos say it all Rachel thank you
Rachel so beautiful to see your eyes sparkle, reflecting all that you are, a real transformation back to the real you.
What a lovely transformation Rachel. What you said about smiling is great and something I too have noticed, not just with myself but in many other photos. The smile can be such a put on and a socially generated presentation of oneself in an attempt to ‘fit in’. The photo of you at 44 is simply gorgeous.
A beautiful transformation back to you!
Thank you Rachel – the pictures say it all. Your Beautiful warmth and presence has truly been captured in your most recent picture, a reflection of your childhood joy which is so gorgeous. So inspiring. The essence of who we are is always there but living life we allow layers of what is not us to block. dull down and hide this truth. This essence is never lost and what you have shared here is evidence of that.
A true transformation to behold Rachel and “…knowing that I no longer had to hide who I am, that I had come home to myself” clearly shows in your last photo. Its ironic that we crave love the most, and yet we often hide the gorgeous love that we are because we don’t see or feel any love in the world around us but if we were all to fully shine our loving light there would be reflections for all to see and feel that there is love in the world, and it is ok to show it in all its glory.
Your transformation back to your true self Rachel is indeed stunning, reflecting the gorgeous beautiful woman that you now know that you are. It is almost unbelievable, except that it is true, when we see photos of ourselves and how we have become ‘deformed’, in a sense, from living not living who we truly are. The personas we take on, the walls we build and the parts we play to simply get by, numb or avoid what we are truly feeling only serve to distance us from living the immense love that we truly already are in essence. As you have profoundly said – ‘This not being who we are but being who we think we should be, hurts us as it goes against our innermost nature.’
You speak of your recent photo as: ‘It is of a tender, loving, beautiful woman who is not smiling with her mouth but with her eyes and all her heart… allowing you to see deep inside of her to the very essence of who she is, an essence that is pure love.’ These words are truly beautiful, as is the photo, as you are – thank you, Rachel.
Your transformation is amazing Rachel. The depth in your new photos is truly beautiful. Where the old photos definitely keep people out, the new photos are of a woman who truly loves. You are a joy to behold.
What a magical moment to look at a image of yourself and know it is truly you. This very statement makes me realise how often that is not the case.
Hi Rachel, I just loved reading this blog and the pictures reveal so much more than words. When you look at photo’s like this its impossible not to see the journey you have been on from love filled child to protection and back to love filled tender woman – quite a journey. If this is possible and it quite clearly is then the whole world can benefit from your journey.
The changes you have made in your life Rachel are amazing, your photos are evidence that the way you live now supports you to be the tender, loving and beautiful woman that you truly are.
And I love the picture of the gorgeous, relaxed, playful, cheeky 3 year old Rachel, which is reflected in the gorgeous you at 44. Just awesome to see and just highlights, that we all do have the power to change our lives, each and every one of us, no matter what our past has been.
A Delight to read your story Rachel and through your photos, see how you have transformed, which I can very much relate to. I was Always in hiding and became invisible so I would not be ‘seen’, and did not like to look in the mirror…that was how I lived my life, but thank goodness for Serge Benhayon for showing me a new way to live.
Wow what a change Rachel – you look so much younger an healthier now than when you were thirty. And your whole body and your face is not so hard and stiff anymore. Your eyes and your smile is shining and radiating through the photo – beautiful. It is a great joy for me to see and feel what is possible if we allow ourselves to not hide but instead show everything from us.
Thank you Rachael for sharing your story and photos, I am feeling moved to get mine out and look at them, another step for me to deepen my appreciation of who I am now and where I have come from.
Photos and videos of ourselves can be very revealing. Is it any surprise, if so much can be felt, as you’ve discovered Rachel that it’s common to hear people say they don’t like their photo taken? Recently I have started recording myself and have learnt so much about the way I appear or portray myself to the outside world. At first it wasn’t pretty, I was reacting to what I saw. It is well worth being aware of these behaviours that are not us that are still literally in our face! It’s cool to read how now you’ve been able to have photos taken of the real you and not a front or a surface picture of ‘you’ anymore.
Isn’t it truly amazing that there are a group of people who consistently are looking better and better as they get older… They really must be something here to look at that is creating such consistent evolution.
How refreshing to see someone learning and growing as they get older, becoming more of themselves rather than entrenching old patterns and becoming ‘bitter and twisted’. The photos of you now Rachel are beautiful, a fitting advertisement for your wise words.
This blog has shown me the quality of a women is not defined by shape or look.
Rachel Hall wears a profession blazer, button up shirt and vest to match.
This isn’t the conventional look of a women but from the above photos and writing she shows every bit of an amazing woman that she is!
Rachel, I am so happy to have you here, to see you, you are the sun to my eyes, making everything a bit more colorful, more truthful, more loving, more commited, you add your unique flavour to everything you pass by. And you are very present.
Beautiful comment felixschumacher8 which sums up the gift of Rachel to us all – her commitment to truth and sharing it is awesome and so needed.
Thank YOU Rachel for allowing yourself out, utterly gorgeous to feel.
Wow Rachel, what an incredible beautiful change there is, in your eyes, your smile, your face and your whole demeanour. 44 years young and gorgeous – reflecting back a true picture of you.
So beautiful, Rachel!!
Beautiful transformation Rachel and I loved the photo of you (as you said) “..not smiling with her mouth but with her heart….”
Wow Rachel that was really beautiful to read and so gorgeous to see the same light in you now as when you were 3. It is so sad that we all seem to protect ourselves and dim that light as we grow older yet inspirational to know we can reverse that at any age like your photos and writing have clearly shown.
It is remarkable how much we can tell about ourselves just by really LOOKING at pictures of us taken at different stages of our lives. By the way, I love your hair in the picture of you as a little girl!! The difference between your picture as soldier and now as you is unbelievable.
What I got from your pictures Rachel, is how we get worn down by life and how this takes away the brightness and joy that is naturally there when we are young. Your photos are living proof that this can change if we allow our natural loving gentle ways to to be expressed without the need to protect ourselves. I love the openness of your smile at 44, so different from your guarded smile at 30.
Hi Rachel, the difference between your photo aged 30 and aged 44 is amazing. In your later photo the defensiveness and protection is gone, and what is left is the tender woman underneath shining out. Beautiful.
It is great lining these up… seeing how you wear what you live. The shift from 30 – 44 is quite amazing.
There is a lovely openness and warmth that I feel you are emanating in your latest photo Rachel, and the little Rachel had those qualities too, as well as playfulness, which you evidently felt at the photo shoot. It was inspiring to read about your return to the true you, and how you are now enjoying being you.
I love this Rachel. The picture of the little girl is just adorable and the one at the end really shows how you smile with your eyes.
I love seeing changes like these, you are so gorgeous now! You look safe, beautiful and totally open to people. I also like how you explained what you had observed from each photo as well, it made me analyse the photo’s in more detail which helped me notice the extent you have changed. Congratulations Rachel – this is extraordinary!
Your photographs say it all Rachel. You are a now a shining light.
Awesome Rachel! You are beaming!!
Gorgeous picture line-up, Rachel, from sweet and playful to hard and sad and back to tender and joyful again. What I also love is how you enjoy sharing you with your team and the world reflected in the way the photoshoot for your new site went. I can relate to that. I never liked my picture being taking. Always wanted to hide or duck when there was a camera. Where now I am fine with it and willing to share and show me to the world also in a picture.
Hi Rachel, I really enjoyed reading your blog of your unfolding. It’s a beautiful testament to you doing the work on yourself, of allowing yourself to become aware of your masks and your hurts, dealing with the hurts and discarding the masks, to reveal the beautiful amazing you!
Very beautiful Rachel, great to see how you have made a detour into not wanting to show yourself and to see the amazing change.
She certainly made a right turn coming back to herself 😉
The shot at age 44 is my favourite Rachel. This was taken when you were utterly You, no ‘face’ on, no trying, just being you on the inside and it shows on the outside. You asked the question early in the blog, where did that gorgeous little girl go – the answer is nowhere. Never left you, you just had to let her shine bright.
Absolute gold, Rachel Hall… that you are that golden child and her joy, love of life and people radiate out from you once again.
Is this not what the vast majority of humanity is truly seeking? To find ourselves again in this way, drop all that we loaded up with in defence and protection from the ‘world outside’, and to be a committed, joyful and loving part of humanity once again?
Celebrating the deeply beautiful woman that you are, and knowing you in person, that this radiance from you is an absolute FACT. Today in early 2015, the beauty of you has only but deepened…
Just beautiful Rachel, it’s lovely to feel and see the true you shining for all the world to see.
Thats very beautiful- thanks for sharing your “coming back”.
Thank you Rachel for sharing your blog and photos , a photo does tell a million words and what a joy to read them all.
I know photos from the past are scary things aren’t they? But at the same time, they really show how far we all have come! You look truly beautiful Rachel. Thank you for writing and publishing the photos of you in this very honest article.
I have seen these photos before, but revisiting them this morning, they tell so much. It is so very inspiring.
Beautiful Rachel. I have stayed looking at the ‘after’ photo of you for quite a while and felt you were in the room with me. I found I was smiling inside and out as I felt you shining through the photo.
Wow, Rachel. What a transformation. Stunning.
Thank you Rachel for sharing your beauty with us..inspiring to see the changes made as you have chosen to be you. Gorgeous 🙂
Beautiful Rachel. I too have experienced the fun of photography when we allow ourselves to be seen – it was a lot of fun. Thanks to Universal Medicine for showing us the way!
You are gorgeous Rachel and such an inspiration. Seeing ‘before & after photos’ is so powerful.
Rachel. Wonderful blog. Amazing pictures of you over the years. It may have taken many years to find yourself, but you are truly an open and loving person, and your radiance shines through for all to see.
A beautiful blog Rachel, thank you. Being very shy growing up, which really means I had no confidence, I can definitely relate to disappearing and blending into the background. These days I am not about to volunteer to go to the front of the stage but I will not disappear or do any blending as I know that my voice not only deserves to be heard it needs to be heard.
Beautiful comment Susan. It is a very poignant and tender moment when we remember we just have to be who we are. I always cry each time I give myself permission to just be me.
I am so glad you have come out and stopped hiding Rachel as it is very inspiring to see you so relaxed, at ease and poised. You are much, much needed in this world.
Thank you Rachel for sharing your complete transformation and your return to the real beautiful and tender you. You are an example for the whole of humanity. We loose ourselves and also years if not decades to comply with the demand of society. Looking at the picture of you as a little girl of 3 it also reminded me that we ARE born tender, loving , playful, pure and at ease with our bodies.
It was lovely to read this article Rachel. No longer having to hide and coming home to yourself is something to celebrate. I could feel the joy in your words.
Hi Rachel this blog really touched me and as Johanna said your expression now is just that which you had as a child, the loving tenderness is in your eyes and the girl who knows herself to be beautiful is now the beautiful woman.
I am truly touched and in total appreciation by these amazing photos. You look and feel amazing and emanate exactly that which you had as a little girl. So delicious and definitely no need to hide.
Awesome Rachel. Your transformation from hardness to tenderness is an inspiration.
The tenderness reflected in the now photos is incredible – for the first time I got to see who I really am on the inside being expressed in my eyes, my face and my body.
So true Rachel, your whole body and being oozes it.
Rachel, you are stunning at 44!!!!! Wow what a change.
What a change from the sweet little girl to that tough person I felt I had to become just to get by, and then to come full circle again. Wow indeed…
Thank you for sharing… our beautiful Rachel. ❤
Thank you Jody – I have seen you change and grow over the past few years and it is a delight to watch.
Truly inspiration Rachel. A modern miracle without any wand waving. Amazing how at 44 you can look younger.
Yes it is a miracle. I was so lost and sad and now I feel a deep joy and appreciation of who I am. My passport photo of when I was 22 looks older than I do now – shows how the strain of how we live becomes etched in our face and body language.
🙂 I feel JOY as I read this Rachel!
Me too, and looking at those pictures takes my breath away.
How could they not take your breath away!
You are so divinely beautiful Rachel, in the pictures and even more so face to face. Your transformation back to yourself has been inspiring to observe. The tenderness in your face and in your eyes is also in your body, the way you move and hold yourself, and the way you are with people. You, like many others are living breathing proof that the Way of the Livingness restores people to true and loving life. Those pictures are indeed worth more than one thousand words. Your life and the way you live it are worth more than their weight in pure gold.
Thank you for sharing this with the world.
After reading ‘You, like many others are living breathing proof that the Way of the Livingness restores people to true and loving life’ in this comment, the words ‘to be truly loving and alive’ followed in my thoughts. The joy in feeling and living like this is immeasurable and is our natural way of being.
As a child I loved a ‘picture book story’ – especially one with a happy ending. Thanks for reminding me of the joy of that.
Gayle, this was so beautiful ❤️
Wow Rachel, a true ‘coming out’ of the real YOU. The visuals only tell half the story when you come to FEEL the true picture of you. Thank you for sharing – and I love your freedom of expression about YOU. Who you are, in essence, is each of us – we can all ‘come out’ because we are all essentially the love that you have invited us all to connect with.
Exactly – this is what is possible for us all when we make a simple choice to connect to who we are and let it out for others to see and feel it for, and in, themselves.
A beautiful transformation Rachel… although it wasn’t really a transformation as your love and tenderness were there all along.
Just hidden behind the glare of trying to be hard. I look at myself as a little girl and see pure delight and love that makes others light up in return. And now I live that everyday – and I also see it in my family, friends, work mates and in my extended family…
So awesome Rachel that you have re-discovered these innate qualities of love and tenderness, and show that it is possible to return to the essence of who we are.
So true rodharvey, the truth is this natural love and tenderness is within each one of us, simply waiting for the opportunity for us to reconnect to this and shine once again.
Just hidden. As we all are so good at doing. Your a bit of an inspiration Rachel! A delight to see x