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121 thoughts on “Universal Medicine & Esoteric Breast Massage: The Effect of Sport on one Woman’s Body”
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The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
I wonder how many of us ‘sell out’ who we are for the lure of pleasing another – often a parent – and to get something that is apparently of value like our father being proud of us. Yet it seems to me, this is the start of a rocky road where we are discontent with ourselves and disconnected from our true expression of self. I certainly did it and can remember the moment it happened. How wonderful it would be to be honoured for who we are and to honour ourselves for who we are rather than what we do. Life might look very different if this were the case.
Thank you Anonymous for an awesome testimony. As a man I have not of course experienced an EBM – but I have experienced many other esoteric healing and bodywork techniques. I have no doubt about their power at all and hence can fully appreciate what you share here too.
We need to pay more heed to the evidence before our eyes. It doesn’t have to be a double blind placebo controlled experiment to present something that is of truth for consideration.
This is very significant, “Over the period of a year and a half I lost 30 kilos, which I had never been able to do before, even when I was playing sport and trying lots of different diets. My body shape changed also and so did the way I interacted with people: I was no longer as guarded.” I don’t mean loosing the “30 kilos” alone either, I mean the fact the focus or dedication was to loosing weight or changing the body shape etc but it became about more personally how you were interacting within the world, “I was no longer guarded”, it sounds like the weight was a physical outplay of what you were doing inside. It’s amazing the huge changes that can come when you bring awareness to the inside and bring that out rather then trying to change the outside to hide the in. It would seem clear that everything we ever need to know lays within us and if we can’t see that yet it merely means that it is time to take more care.
What we do to ourselves in the name of protection is extraordinary as we hurt ourselves and damage our bodies in a way that creates more pain and suffering than could ever come from feeling, in the moment, the reactions from others and the feelings this brings up in us, we are protecting our self against in the first place.
I know what you mean when you write that you were equating fragility with being pathetic; this is far from the truth of course but it has to be felt in the body first before we can recognise that there is strength in fragility.
I had to laugh anonymous when it was suggested you be more fragile with yourself and it was like raising a red flag to a bull – when we are exposed for something we know in our hearts is true we often react emotionally when instead we should simply see it as an opportunity to change.
The care and tenderness that can be received in an Esoteric Breast Massage is incredible to encounter, it shifted a lot of hardness and protection in my body that has not returned. I feel more womanly, gentle and powerful and this is growing.
I love your honesty, and interesting how Serge’s suggestion caused such a reaction in you, ‘ “you need to be more fragile with yourself”, I was outraged. It was like a red rag to a bull, I wanted to take him down, like I would someone on a hockey field. It brought up such a fury in me and I thought he was asking me to be pathetic, and I wanted to show him I was tough and could cope. I was surprised by how intense my reaction was.’
The impacts of sport on the womans body I don’t feel is actually acknowledged or recognised as yet. Or even going to the gym for that matter. We champion the svelt and very cut style of body shape these days, yet really it is so unfeminine. It is very masculine looking and that is exactly the energy women go into when aiming, striving and desperately work themselves to the bone at the gym to get that look. Not so appealing to me.
To allow ourselves to live with tenderness and loving with ourselves is a gift we can give ourselves. It is a most beautiful way to live and be with ourselves.
The honesty shared here is a clear understanding as to why many, even after injury, or at times with injury continue with activities such as sport, exercise, horse riding, motorbike riding etc. And how it can be impossible to see life with out these activities, or to feel we are less if we can no longer do them. To bring this understanding to another and offer the beauty of grace is a powerful gift to reinstating worth amongst humanity.
A great sharing, how much easier it was to go into hardness and protection as we grew up rather than stay connected to our fragility and tenderness. It is lovely to be returning back to this.
How many children (or adults!) do this .. play sports or are competitive so they are recognised by parents or professionals to feel they are worth something. I would say quite a lot! Seeking love outside of ourselves, rather than within, and not honouring how we truly feel never works… no matter how much we want it to! Love Serge he will always say the truth to help another even if he gets the brunt of anger or frustration hurled at him! Now that is true love. And this is pretty amazing that from having a few EBMs what you tried to change in years happened naturally and easily – ‘Over the period of a year and a half I lost 30 kilos, which I had never been able to do before, even when I was playing sport and trying lots of different diets. My body shape changed also and so did the way I interacted with people: I was no longer as guarded.’ Amazing 😍
Both men and women are naturally tender and gentle to play any sort of sport; we have to harden and toughen up, I know I did for many years as well and it took quite awhile for my body to release this deep tension and masculine energy I had taken on in my body. We are blessed to have modalities such as the very powerful Esoteric Breast Massage that allows the space and grace for us to reconnect back to our tenderness and delicateness once again.
Having an Esoteric Breast Massage allows me to feel and appreciate the strength that is within my body as a delicate and precious woman.
It is amazing what we ‘do’ to protect ourselves. Sport being one of those choices to keep us hard and motivated in life to not feel our fragility and accept who we are.
Amazing story. Thank you, Anonymous. I particularly liked how you didn’t want to have Esoteric Breast Massage but you went to have it, honouring a part of you that knew it to be true. It just goes to show no matter that our true essence never gets lost and we always know when truth comes to our way.
This story highlights the inner conflict that must affect virtually all teens, the need to conform to a certain way of behaving as a coping mechanism for life. Boys must act tougher, girls must be “girly”, no-one is ever given permission to just be who they are. It is this confusion and restricting that makes growing up such a pressure cooker for so many young people, and perhaps one of the reasons why cutting has become such a used relief from that pressure.
And that is the beauty of being living proof… you can’t argue with the changes you witness in yourself, especially when they are as profound as what you have experienced. The transformations that people have had are powerful testaments to the true healing that the Universal Medicine modalities offer
I just joined a gym and find it very interesting how much we believe we need to push ourselves and achieve some kind of body shape and what kind of strain is needed for that. Hardly anybody exercises for the joy of supporting their health and their body treating it tenderly even whilst exercising, except maybe some of the elderly or people that recover from injuries.
It is hard to imagine a beautiful, tender and sensitive 5-year-old girl playing hockey!. The things we do just to be recognized by our parents, whether that is to play sport, bury ourselves in academia, rebel, be the “good” child etc when all we are craving is to be seen for who we are. As adults, we have a responsibility to show our young people that they can be seen and met for who they are and not what they do so that they can grow up and remain the tender, sweet and sensitive beings that they are.
It is amazing to realise that our bodies store up energetic imprints from how we live, move, think and the choices we make. They become a map of our lives – but thankfully, that map can be healed and with the right support, we can redirect our lives to rediscover the innate wisdom there is within us all.
This is a beautiful and powerful testimony to Esoteric Breast Massage Anonymous. Our bodies are the scientific proof to how effective these sessions are and this cannot be denied. I too found an enormous transformation in myself that I could not deny even though it was not as obvious as your weight loss; it was a reconfiguring of myself as a woman first and foremost where I had unknowingly identified myself almost solely as a mother for over 30 years
What strikes me most when reading your experience is how you knew being fragile with yourself was a truth and that the way you were cared for in the Esoteric Breast Massage treatments was something you deserved, as you kept coming back regardless the resistance/fury you could also feel coming up.
I was never much into sport but I did do hard physical work and did it in the same way as you anonymous, pushing and hardening myself to prove myself and to be accepted. This did not work and just incurred massive damage to my body. The EBM and all the Universal Medicine modalities have given me my body and my life back. I now celebrate my delicateness as through that I can now feel again, everything, and though this is challenging at times, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
When I look back on the sports I used to be involved in, my body had to go into hardness to partake in them. And then, the continuing of them was like a reinforcement. Now when I exercise, there are some movement and ways of exercising that lock my body into hardness. When we reinforce and lock our bodies in this way, it is no wonder we react to the thought or mention of fragility or tenderness.
It is astounding how many women, myself included drifted so far from our natural tenderness. I have uncovered quite a deep sadness because of this drifting.
Anonymous thankyou, I have felt very supported by your story again today. What you have shared has helped me understand that the anger I feel at times may be me not able to accept the fragile person I truly am, or not coping with the way life is and the fragility that’s hidden underneath the tough hard defensiveness. I can also feel I may be carrying the same judgements or beliefs about women being weak in fragility and delicateness.
The Esoteric Breast Massage (EBM) is a powerful modality. I was astounded when I first had them by how transformational it is to experience the exquisite tenderness and delicateness of an EBM practitioner massaging a part of the body that is usually either ignored or used to get something from. My body changed so much from having EBM’s, I went from being very overweight due to protecting myself against the world to being the very petite and delicate woman that I naturally always was.
Anonymous, Thank you for sharing your story, working in a school I can see how children can become hard in sport to try and do better. With football I see the boys play in such a rough way so they can win, off the football pitch the boys can be very sweet, on the pitch there is an expectation that they do not cry and that they just bounce back up again, there is no care for themselves or each other.
As a youngster I was brought up to believe we had to toughen up and be good at sport, give as good as you got and all that sort of nonsense and it wasn’t until I came across Serge Benhayon after many years of trying to make out I was a lot tougher and harder than I actually was, that I came to understand that there was real strength in connecting to the gentleness and the tenderness that we are all capable of. I am still a bit rough at times but nothing compared to the rugby playing motorcycle rider of the past.
Thank you for this great sharing Anonymous – the EBM modality is revolutionary in connecting women back to their true selves, even through all the layers of protection we try to heap on ourselves, our fragility, preciousness and sacredness as a women will never leave us.
I didn’t ever excel at sport (although I tried at different times to make exercise etc more of a priority – mainly in order to lose weight) but I can regardless certainly relate to doing things for recognition and / or to get attention and in order to prove my self worth. A huge shift happened for me too when I started having Esoteric Breast Massages, and as a result and over time and learning to be much more loving and tender with myself, I have begun to notice that I no longer feel like a man in a woman’s body but a woman in my own (womanly) body!
Adam I so agree just because something is normal does not necessarily make it true. In fact what I have come to know is that what most people deem ‘normal’ is not true at all. Take for example, it is ‘normal’ to drink coffee, this is because we have a humanity that is mostly exhausted as they do not listen to their bodies and push themselves through the day thus needing a stimulant to get them through. Because the masses are drinking coffee it is deemed ‘normal’ We now have a group of students of the Way of the Livingness who do not drink coffee or eat or drink any sugary substances, are vital and not exhausted and we are deemed ‘abnormal’ by many. Interesting!!!!
The Esoteric Breast Massage has supported thousands of women to re-connect to their breasts and to the preciousness and tenderness they innately are. This modality is revolutionary, EBM’s change the way they see and experience their breasts as well as their body and being.
Wow anon. this is an awesome blog you are a living miracle. Takes dedication to self to allow yourself the support of the EBM to expose and let go of the hardness and protection you were living with and relied on to get you through life . It is so inspiring that you were able to re-connect to your fragility and accept the woman you naturally are.
Coming back to our tender and precious selves is a gift the Esoteric Modalities offer us, how beautiful you were able to embrace this and let go of the hardness you had built up to protect yourself. Your story is a living miracle for others to be inspired by – thank you.
Dear Anonymous I have never been involved in competitive sports but I was very competitive with myself and did abuse my body. It took me a long time to understand the rationale behind looking after my body. I thought I was doing the right thing: exercising, eating a relatively healthy diet not smoking or drinking. What was lacking was my presence when going about my days. I have since introduced gentleness and care for my precious body and despite the occasional relapse life today is far more simple and enjoyable.
It is interesting that the courage you showed on the sports field also took you to have an Esoteric Breast Massage. Serge Benhayon’s invitation to feel the fragility in your body was clearly felt deeply within you and you are able to let go of the anger and hardness that was preventing you from being the beautiful woman you are. Definitely for you and all of us to celebrate.
“While there may not be a proven scientific study behind it yet, I can use my body as my science and I simply cannot argue with the changes that have occurred in my body and in my life as a result of the support from Universal Medicine, its practitioners and healing modalities.” This is a powerful testimonial to the amazing changes many of us have now made using the amazing modalities from Universal Medicine. When many have documented their experiences, these will be studied by science. Whilst most of the world is trending downhill towards disease and obesity to name a few, Unimed students are bucking this trend, becoming more vibrant and looking ever more youthful as they age. There is no money to be made by pharmaceutical companies in prevention of disease, but this is surely the way and Unimed is leading the field.
When I was a teenager I played sport nearly every night of the week. I was good at netball but not that good at basketball. I found I had to be tougher at basketball. I felt I had to be more aggressive and it just didn’t feel like me. With all the various sports I played I somehow tried to find the tenderness in each sport without realising what I was doing. In netball when I held the ball to shoot a goal, I had this ritual of spinning the ball in the palm of my hand before I would shoot a goal. Even in karate, the forms we learnt felt like a dance/ballet so this is how I did them. It’s amazing how our tenderness is always there.
Wow, this is a great testimony of how harming sport can be if it is used to toughen up and find recognition and acceptance. The idealization of sport is really dangerous and kids are pushed into it under a supposed healthy lifestyle, but as you share it is quite the opposite. All the kids I know who are in lots of sport don’t have a good body feeling and they are not sensitive at all. They are quite numb in their bodies, they know the movements and have the capacity to run or hit the ball, but there is no true body awareness and feeling for their body. Most of them overeat, don’t have a feeling for cold temperatures and are quite clumsy in their movements. This is such an important topic and your blog is an amazing contribution to unveil the myth about sport.
I love reading about the miraculous changes people make after learning about the Ancient Wisdom via Universal Medicine. To lose 30 kilos without trying is something many women can only dream of; but all because you initiated changes in your life. Universal Medicine modalities and their practitioners give us all an amazing opportunity to re–look at areas of our life – and heal. I am learning more about my own fragility and certainly used to tough it out. Accepting and appreciating my own tenderness is the way forward for me now.
”Despite how uncomfortable I was with what was coming up, I continued to have EBMs” – I can really relate to this. It’s amazing how, despite the obvious resistance, a part of us does recognise the truth and somehow allow itself to be pulled back into where it comes from.
I think that’s a significant question and one many of us could relate to Samantha. Thank you for sharing how it wasn’t always comfortable to address what came up from the Esoteric Breast Massage but how you listened to the deeper part of you that knew it was actually supporting you.
Thank you for sharing this important change in your life. I recognize playing it tough as a girl only having brothers and only playing with boys in the neigbourhood. I hated pink and anything else girly and the way I looked didn’t fit the picture of how I felt inside. On the outside a girl and on the inside a boy and whenever I dressed like a girl I felt unsafe and vulnerable. I did all I could to not feel that way so I kept this tough act going for most of my life. All my life I felt insecure around men because I had no idea how to be with them, how to be a woman. I felt comfortable around men as long as they didn’t fancy me or I didn’t fancy them but dating or being in a relationship was something completely different. The various modalities of Universal Medicine have helped me to be gentle with myself and since then I am starting to appreciate myself more and more. Understanding and appreciating all the beautiful qualities of a woman has made me understand that each gender has its own valuable qualities and I don’t have to equal a man to be powerful and strong.
Thank you for sharing. I can relate to the anger and fury that you’ve felt. Thanks to Serge Benhayon and esoteric practitioners I now have the understanding that when I feel angry it’s a reminder that I’ve not been prepared to feel the sadness that was there first.
Great blog and thank you for sharing your journey and your willingness to go there and the way you have used your body’s confirmation that you were on the right track.
It never ceases to amaze me how we change from our tender,precious, fragile natural state to being hard, shut down and the total opposite to who we truly are, all for recognition and acceptance from outside of us. Thank Goodness for Universal Medicine Therapies which offer us an opportunity to re-connect, let go of all the ‘what is not us’ and return to our natural state of being.
It’s crazy how we as young girls can get rewarded for being hard and tough just like the boys, when all along the boys don’t really want to be like that in the first place. Girls are naturally nurturing so how far from yourself did you have to go, to harden up to that extent – thank you for sharing Anonymous.
Its good to read about your transformation after coming into contact with Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon
We get so rewarded in life for being who we are truly not and that makes accepting who we truly are even harder. What you have chosen here is amazing.
Hi Anne, yes we are championed for being tough and being able to do as much as a bloke, we go along with this because it suits us to not be in our fragility and preciousness as we do not want to take responsibility for what we have to offer humanity should we truly claim and live the essence of ourself as the divine woman we naturally are.
This is an amazing story anonymous, ‘my whole life I had been wanting to be fragile and tender with myself but had never allowed it.’ I can really relate to what you have written, I grew up as a ‘tomboy’ and it is still a work in progress for me to allow myself to be fragile and tender, i can feel how this is my natural way and it feels beautiful to return to this after many years of being hard on myself and treating my body in a hard, unloving way.
I remember playing loads of sport throughout high school your body changes some much to feeling really unnatural by trying to match it with the guys, I felt super awkward around the other girls as I didn’t see my body like theirs.
I remember also feeling that I had to be tough like the boys, play brandy, or soccer and not supposed to cry when the ball hit really hard – when I was 6 a soccer ball in the face broke my nose .. and did everything to pretend it didn’t hurt although it was deeply painful – but at the time part I remember a part of me saying – this really doesn’t feel ok. Funny it can take 40 years before you start listening to that inner voice of wisdom.
I can deeply relate to what you are sharing and am thankful that you have expressed this. I remember when I could handle a painful situation without crying I got congratulated for “being a very strong girl”. And so, more and more, I hardened myself up – because there was recognition in this, it seemed to be what was wanted of me. When I had an appendix infection at the age of 9 I simply said “I don’t want to go to school today, I don’t feel like it”. My mum took me to the hospital that day sensing something was not right. If she hadn’t, only one hour later my appendix would have exploded and I could have died. It is so beautiful that today I know my fragility and tenderness are the keys to truly be me.
Being fragile and vulnerable in society is something that is not encouraged in any way, even for women and to allow yourself to feel this and be open to what you are learning about yourself through having Esoteric Breast Massage is huge. What are we putting ourselves and our bodies through with the sport and competition if we react in such an intense way to a man saying we need to be more fragile with ourselves, or in other words treat ourselves with more care, love and tenderness. As you say all the reaction was, was yourself not allowing your self to be that way with yourself, even though that’s all you wanted. It’s like we lie to ourselves or get so invested in the whole ideal of sport that we leave ourselves completely behind.
I love this line – ‘my whole life I had been wanting to be fragile and tender with myself but had never allowed it.’
Thank you for your honest sharing. It was lovely to read about the changes you have experienced since your involvement with Universal Medicine began, particularly how you now feel able to accept and express the tenderness and fragility you naturally are. Beautiful.
I recognise that what is in this blog has also happened to me in my sporting endeavors. The healing I have embraced no longer allows the hardening and anger to control my life. Thank you Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon for sharing and providing the inspiration for the amazing changes that are available to all.
Thank you for your comment Greg. It is beautiful that you share how it is the same for men who are also very tender, caring and precious as are we all.
Exactly Nicola, we are all learning to be students of our own Livingness!
I see kids who are don’t score well academically being put into sport as a way to prove they are actually capable and or good at something. The recognition gained from winning or being good at sport is seen as a good things, but like you saw eventually, the body has to toughen up in order to be able to perform. In that toughening, the physical body is not the only part hardening; it’s the feelings and sensitivity that hardens too, leaving a body that can’t feel the beauty and magic of life and see beyond what the eyes can see. It is inspiring to read your story, and see that it’s never too late to change things.
I find it inspiring that a ‘tough, hard woman’, as you portrayed yourself to be, can firstly choose to take yourself for an Esoteric Breast Massage and secondly make the changes you have in your life. Thank you for your beautifully honest sharing.
I agree Carmin. The way this lady was portraying herself as tough and hard and then went for an EBM – that’s huge. I am so proud of this lady for the changes she has made to her life. She is a living example to everybody that tenderness is so natural to our bodies.
What a fantastic blog. I loved reading this because you were fully yourself, not editing yourself but expressing so authentically. That in itself was so healing. It’s such a gift to read such self acceptance in how you relayed honestly and fully your story, I always find that very healing and encouraging to me to just be myself. I wasn’t involved with sports however I can identify with being tough, never showing hurt, and pushing through how I really felt. Allowing myself to be fully a woman has been a challenge as I chose to be a tomboy in childhood and felt very influenced by the macho/masculine aspects of Australian culture that sees any form of displayed vulnerability as “weakness”.
Beautiful anonymous! How amazing is how far we go to please our parents and get recognition from them. I did not go into sports but I went for a PhD, which is also a perfect setting where to be lost forever, thinking that you are not. In this setting, the way you get tougher is different, but it is simply a different flavour of something that is born out the wrong impress anyway.
Interesting how you write of becoming ‘tougher’ at such a young age and that you could feel this helped you do well at sport. Even at a simple young kids Sports Day I witnessed this and I have seen the kids become harder and so push through to win over others.
My reaction to these words “you need to be more fragile with yourself” was shock and if I am not how do I do it….I felt how my body felt in that moment and realised I am not fragile with myself. I kept pondering this for a long time, until I had an Esoteric Breast Massage and Esoteric Sacred Healing sessions, I had no idea that my body was so hard and tough, attempting to protect myself from the world. It was only in these sessions that I began to feel what I had built and held around me. Thank you for sharing.
Your article is very exposing as to how we adults can force our wants and needs onto children to become something that doesn’t really seem natural to them.
Great article on the power of the EBMs and the changes that occur when we connect to our bodies and choose to nurture them with the tenderness and care they deserve. You are indeed your own scientific study and are living proof. Awesome. Thank you for sharing your inspirational journey.
Thank you, Anonymous, for this beautiful, honest sharing. “While there may not be a proven scientific study behind it yet, I can use my body as my science and I simply cannot argue with the changes that have occurred in my body and in my life as a result of the support from Universal Medicine, its practitioners and healing modalities” – I second that, yes, our body is science.
It was great to read what you present, as although my story differs I can relate to building that wall of protection around myself to keep life out. It’s fascinating that even though the Universal Medicine modalities can bring so much up for us (anger/upset/reactions) what is beautiful is that inside there is a knowing that underneath it all lies the truth and when we let that shine through we begin to feel our true self again. Lovely to feel the true you.
We all know Love. We all come into the world with that memory written into every cell of our bodies and so life begins. For the majority it takes us away from ourselves but the knowingness never disappears, sadly the world we live in surrounds us with feedback via recognition, rewards, achievements etc. and so the memory of something missing is somewhat relieved for a time by choices we make. The day comes when our body starts to speak to us in other ways and by listening a new depth is revealed. Thank you Anon for revealing what is possible when we have the courage to listen and respond. A Beautiful sharing of re-connection through truly listening and the support of Esoteric Breast Massage.
Great blog Anonymous, it must just feel so much better in your body now compared to before. I have also, through Universal Medicine become hugely more tender and gentle and let go of a lot of hardness in my body.
The Esoteric Breast Massage is a truly amazing modality that helps us as women to re connect to our innate essence that is delicate, precious and gorgeous.
This is encouraging to go further along the path to Self-Love and eventually Love.
There is no need for scientific proof, my body shows it all. I always find it fascinating that we live in a world where we always want science to back us up. But what if we use our own bodies as a living proof, which talks to us in every moment. I receive regular Esoteric Breast Massage sessions and the changes I experience are profound. For me there is no bigger truth as my body never lies.
Such honesty in your blog which makes it very relatable. As you share, we can build so many protective layers which results in a hardened body. We think we are protecting ourselves but actually we are shutting ourselves down to be something we are not.
I find it interesting that you shared how your relationship with others changed when you changed how you related to yourself. I have found this to strongly be the case. The more gentle and caring we are with ourselves, the more we can bring that same love and tenderness to another, which feels quite amazing.
Wow Anonymous thank you for your sharing… I can very much relate to the part of not being fragile. How is it possible that we as women go so far away from who we truly are? I was so lost in being a better woman and with that to fit into the world that I needed a role model who showed me an other way. This was Natalie Benhayon she reminds me of the fragile woman I am deep inside of me. Your blog Anonymous is also a great reminder and a great reflection – wunderbar.
Dear Anonymous, thank you for sharing your journey from the toughness of playing sport to the discovery of your tenderness and fragility through Esoteric Breast Massage. I loved the words “my whole life I have been wanting to be fragile and tender with myself but had never allowed it”, but now you have, beautiful.
Dear Anonymous you said ‘ I can use my body as my science ‘, how very true. I have experienced changes in my body since participating in Universal Medicine. Some ailments have nearly disappeared. Thank you for sharing your tenderness.
….. What we go through to feel accepted or loved….. What if parents would just say to their children in deep connection ‘I love you deeply the way you are’ ? Making true love and honouring the foundation for parenting would change the world.
Absolutely Maryline. To start life with this simple confirmation from those around us that we are are enough the way we are, in fact we are more than enough. Indeed how this foundation of parenting would change the world.
Dear Anonymous, thank you for sharing your story – it revealed a truly beauty-full unfolding like a caterpillar to the most gorgeous butterfly, feeling that you are cherishing the harmony and true beauty within.
Thank you for sharing. As your article shows anonymous, we start young trying to stamp out the tenderness we feel and hide it not only from the world but from ourselves too. Underneath every woman’s façade their is a tender, delicate and unique wisdom just waiting to be expressed. The more women that claim this quality and reflect it to others, the more all women get a reminder of what lies within and claim that for themselves too.
You have inspired me today dear Anonymous
‘my whole life I had been wanting to be fragile and tender with myself but had never allowed…’ well, things are changing for us Girlfriend and allowing ourselves to be fragile is so wonderful. It is a freedom we deserve. Thank you for sharing.
How awesome that you have allowed yourself to unfold to reveal more of the fragility and tenderness that is You Xx
This is such a great example of what so many of us do from a young age, we do something because we think it is what will give us love and appreciation from another. I wonder what your Dad may have said if you had asked him at the time, whether he would have wanted you to go through the rough games to get his attention?
What an absolute beautiful account you have shared.Thank you! It really demonstrates how the Esoteric Breast Massage truly supports women to reconnect to the natural tenderness and gentleness that lies within.
I too have found the ‘esoteric breast massage to be profound in what it has bought to my life’, these sessions have allowed me to feel that I am a naturally tender, beautiful woman and that the hardness and protection were not me, these sessions have been truly healing.
I love the simplicity and truth in the words ‘I can use my body as my science’. Who needs science when the body tells us exactly how it’s doing? Who needs to wait for science to know what is good for the body or what isn’t, when we have our own innate ability to connect into, feel and work with the body’s own natural intelligence if we choose to listen to it? A great blog, showing the impact that can build in the body from the decisions we make when very young in pursuit of recognition and identity rather than choosing to live the truth – that we are always already enough.
Thank you for sharing yourself through this blog. It is beautiful how you were able to connect with the fact that you had always wanted to be fragile and tender with yourself and as through your words I can feel that this is now a gorgeous part of who you are.
Your blog made me consider my own relationship to sport (and rowing in particular). Looking back I am amazed at what I would do to my body in order to get the things that I felt I needed, whether that was recognition and success, or being accepted as part of a team. It was an extraordinary dedication to something that hurt (alot) and kept me locked away from a tenderness I’ve always felt inside…
Your comment reminds me of a radio programme I listened to about research into the impact on the brain of the concussion-related effects of contact sports. Not only boxing and American football but also the long term effect on the brain of heading the ball in the game of soccer. It’s great that we have such medical and scientific research to give us the evidence but I’d argue that we already know and are just playing out our own version of Russian roulette in exchange for the recognition, success and acceptance that you’ve described.
I’ve definitely fallen for that one… that somehow I am going to protect myself against what is out there trying to get me. Problem is that I simply cut myself off from others, and that leads to desolation, loneliness and a total lack of support.
This is amazing to read anonymous, I can relate to a lot of what you have written, I decided to be a ‘tomboy’ when I was a young woman and I was overweight with a very muscular body and even though I saw ‘girly girls’ as being silly I had a longing to be more feminine. It is beautiful to read how you, ‘started to accept that underneath that, my whole life I had been wanting to be fragile and tender with myself but had never allowed it.’
Yes, that sentence really struck me too Rebecca, and made me think how we seem to have channels or streams for people to choose in terms of who they are. We all know that the labels in the Spice Girls, e.g. ‘Sporty Spice’, ‘Posh Spice etc’, were not real, that it was pure marketing, and yet it seems that this is how it is in life too, you can be sporty girl, academic girl etc, but what about ‘real girl’ who gets to feel whatever she feels, like fragility and tenderness, to honour that, to make mistakes and not be perfect and to be OK with that too?
This is beautiful to read. We are indeed our own scientists and our bodies the markers of the amazing results that self loving choices produce. So lovely to read how you have embraced your tenderness. Thank you.
Your approach to understanding “science” through your body is one of truth. This is what I connect with most about your blog as it feels like a long forgotten truth for everybody. We all know how we feel its just that we have given up on accepting that as our science as we pursue others telling us how we should feel. Why and when did we shirk that responsibility…? The way you have reclaimed that honesty with yourself, that responsibility in taking care of your self and the understanding you give yourself in the choices you make is inspirational.
I found it very inspiring too, the way you have decided to take responsibility in caring for yourself and in your choices. It is a very refreshing outlook on life!
So true Phill. That we have forgotten and chosen to listen to our own truth and taken on others opinions of what is right for us. How crazy is that? but yet how beautiful to now connect to the truth of what our body knows.
Wow such an honest sharing. I love how say that your body is a science, I find that to be so true, there are things I know from just the way my body reacts – that is all the proof I need!
“My whole life I had been wanting to be fragile and tender with myself but had never allowed it.”
I wonder how many women could relate to this?! I certainly can. Thank you Anonymous, this is a great article and just goes to show the lengths we can go to, to the hardness we can adopt, to get recognition, acceptance and love – and from such a “tender” age too.
I too can relate to the tough front that was easy to hide under.
It’s funny how angry we get when someone asks us if this way of living is really who we are. I also rebelled against what I knew to be true for my body because I’d worked out a way to ‘get by’, but as I have accepted the choices I have made in the past, and have honoured a pull to be more loving with myself, I can see how my body and lifestyle has changed too. Anything I do now that is not supportive is very quickly shown to be by my body. It’s beautiful to have that connection and responsibility now.
I can relate to a lot of what you say in your article, I am still letting go of the hardness in my body, even though I did not participate in competitive sports. The Esoteric Breast Massage is definitely a great modality to bring us back to our natural tenderness and fragility.
Sounds like an amazing transformation has taken place. It feels so much better to accept that we are all (men and women) fragile tender human beings instead of the tough machines we are often expected to be.
If only self care and nurturing was championed as sport currently is, how different the world would be.
Thank you for sharing your journey from the enforced hardness of competitive sport to opening up to the tenderness and fragility that is waiting underneath to be connected to. The way that Esoteric Breast Massage supports this is such an amazing process and the changes that I have felt in sessions have allowed me to interact with the world in a much more open and tender way and started to melt the hard shield that I have always presented to others for fear of getting hurt – when actually I am the person who has caused myself more harm than anyone else. My appreciation for this life-changing modality is immense and I loved reading about how it has supported your unfoldment.
I really appreciated reading your blog. It confirmed and discussed a number of topics that have had a huge impact on my life. Particularly how we go hard and try and keep the world from hurting us. This of course doesn’t work, I know I still get hurt, however the hardness has in the past prevented me from truly expressing myself. Although there has not been a scientific study yet, I feel that the dramatic physiologically changes that can occur through making a choice concerning how we care for the body and how it processes emotions will be discovered. My own body has altered dramatically for the better since committing to looking after it and listening to what it can tell me. This isn’t just about diet change, it is also about how I move around and have become more gentle with how I use my body. Your honesty regarding your journey from anger to fragility was heart warming. I am still learning the power of fragility Thank you.
This is beautiful, thank you for sharing. The transition from rough and tough to tenderness is tangible in your words. An inspiration.
Although I have never really been interested in sport or had any brothers Anonymous, reading your blog has given me an insight into the toughness and the hardness of competing and keeping up with your brothers. To go from that to tenderness is inspiring.
An incredible journey and a great inspiration. Thank you for sharing.
Great sharing, thank you Anonymous. I was an only girl with four older brothers, who would not allow me to play with them if I cried. So if I hurt myself or fell over when I was with them, I would harden to fight back my tears so as to not show that I was hurting. I carried this hardness with me throughout my life, and like you, it was only through having sessions with some of the Universal Medicine Practitioners that I felt just how hard my body was. Now through treating my body with tenderness and loving care, I am starting to release the hardness that I carried for so long.
Wow this is great, I have really enjoyed reading how you made changes and brought tenderness to your body. I used to play a lot of squash until I realised that this was actually harming my body. The days after playing I would feel smashed literally and in all the years I did play I could never see how winning over another brought any real joy. I love how you are learning to be tender with yourself. I too am bringing awareness to how hard I can be on myself both physically and emotionally. What a better world we would live in if we allowed this tenderness to be.
If education included one tenth of the presentations from Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine what a change it would bring to the world. As children we grow up looking outside because there are not enough reflections, yet, of the truth but it will come. Great blog showing how we manipulate our body through sport or for some it might be study or other practices to get what we ‘think’ we want.
Interesting how we harden to fit in as children. We choose to harden to survive in an environment that is hard. So we keep re-imprinting hard-ness in the world. Time to break this and educate as you say judykyoung and introduce gentleness instead.
it’s amazing that we are encouraged to take part in competitive sports as part of our development when in truth it creates a hardness that suppresses our natural beauty and tenderness. The Esoteric Breast Massage offers a true reflection that helps us to feel and release this hardness.
Thank you for sharing your feelings and experiences so openly in this blog, Anonymous. As I was reading, it came to me that the letters in ‘scared’ rearrange to make the word ‘sacred’ – rather appropriate seeing you’ve shared how you grew up as a rather fierce sports player who used toughness and force to cover up the fact you were feeling scared…. and yet, underneath this, you knew what you really wanted was to be fragile and tender with yourself – but had never allowed it.
It was wonderful reading how having Esoteric Breast Massages supported you to connect to the precious being you are – a woman so worthy of treating yourself with tenderness and care. This has been my experience as well. I too have found having EBMs an awesome way to re-connect to the delicate sacredness I and every other female hold deep within.