By Rebecca Baldwin, Internet Professional, Goonellabah, NSW
Lately I have seen some pretty horrific treatment of women. I have watched some close female friends get belittled, intimidated and demeaned online and off, and in the national mainstream media.
Mostly this has been instigated by ‘Keyboard Cowards’. Men who use text messages, emails and blogging to debase, harass and intimidate their former partners, and when they are called to account they act as though it’s ‘dramatic’ to call this abuse.
But Keyboard Cowards are not representative of all men, and in fact in recent times I have been more inspired by real men in real life.
As women, we are in good company when there are men that are man enough to say that no amount of intimidation and abuse towards women is acceptable. This is not about being unrealistic or expecting perfection. But how far has the mark of decency been moved when misogyny is not even seen as such?
We need true dialogue between men and women to truly heal, but when you paint a woman as weak and mindless and stupid, you paint her out of the picture and out of the conversation altogether. And that has been the so-far successful tactic of the Keyboard Cowards in their hate campaign: because what they think is a heroic crusade against Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine is in actuality a war of words that has been waged on their wives and daughters – the ‘stupid, easily manipulated women’ – that are essential to be seen as such by the public at large in order to support their obsession that Serge has magical powers of mass mind control.
But it is not all doom and gloom. What inspires me is that there ARE men that are not blinded by their own hurt and hate. There are men with a true understanding of what does and does not constitute abuse. My brother-in-law recently had firm words to a guy for speaking horribly about his girlfriend, in a social situation, with his girlfriend present. This gave the woman a moment to stop and see that the type of treatment she had been living with for many years was not ok. It took the care of another man to really highlight this for her: because in that moment she did not make excuses for her partner’s constant put-downs, and instead saw that it was his choice to be that way. After all, here was a man she was not in a relationship with treating her with more love and respect than her own partner. She described it as a wake-up call that was a long time coming.
There are men like this the world over – those who know what love and care does and does not look like, and who aren’t afraid to call it. These are men worth celebrating; these are the men that constantly inspire me.
It seems we live in a world where it actually takes courage to speak up for women. You will certainly run the risk of being in the line of fire if you do. Often we see men ostracised for breaking some kind of imaginary allegiance to other men, but perhaps really it is because they show other men up. A man that respects women naturally gets the respect of women. Does this cause jealousy amongst other men? Sadly, it is a given.
Serge Benhayon often presents on what does and does not constitute abuse towards women. His work in the area of complementary women’s health is nothing short of revelatory. Thousands of women who have encountered him as a practitioner or presenter have benefited from his simple but comprehensive teachings on the importance of self-nurturing and true self-care. The Esoteric Breast Massage (founded by Serge Benhayon, but only ever strictly practised by female practitioners) has made a massive impact on women’s health on a global scale.
What a sad world we live in when a man who inspires women to develop greater self-care and self-honour is almost automatically treated with suspicion, fear and contempt. It is indicative of men’s deep distrust in themselves and other men that they would misconstrue his work as being part of some massive conspiracy to breed himself an army of submissive automaton women to use for his own self-gain. But the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice. Men who behave in a controlling way will only see control. And so, they get blind-sided to the obvious questions.
To anyone familiar with Serge’s work their arguments make little sense. For instance, if Serge Benhayon is such a master manipulator and ‘just in it for himself’, why would he go to all the effort of creating all the modalities and healing courses? Why work the 14 hour days?
And of course, then there is the more obvious question – if Serge Benhayon is such a charismatic leader who has such a ‘Svengali-like sway on women’, why not just be a Tantra guru? The amazing and deeply disturbing truth is that were he a Tantra guru, he would not be as highly scrutinised as he is now. A friend recently told me of a popular Tantra guru who initiates his women devotees by doing them the favour of allowing them to have sex with him?! Wow! Why aren’t the current Serge-haters on a crusade to ‘bring down’ that guy?
It is a reality that women are careful with men, especially male practitioners, as there are those who can’t be trusted. Many women recommend Serge to their friends based on their own experience of the absolute integrity of his practice – in his Esoteric Healing courses Serge instructs all practitioners on the importance of hand positioning when working on a woman’s heart. The hand is never laid flat to ensure at no stage will the practitioner’s fingers inadvertently make contact with a woman’s breast.
So why, when so many women over a 12 year period have found him to have total integrity in this regard, have the hate-campaigners tried desperately to suggest otherwise by exploiting people’s pre-programmed mistrust of men with lies and vicious rumour?
The fact is, when you have nothing on a guy, you have to drum up lies and incite fear and start rumours to avoid the truth that is too painful to see. But this begs the question: why, if there is nothing there, have these guys been given such airtime in the media?
Why did the media lap up their story that a bunch of stupid women were under the hypnotic influence of a dangerous and controlling man? Because apart from the obvious entrenched sexism in the media that saw the ‘women as stupid’ as natural and without question, there was a misandry here that has not been examined. The fact is, it is almost universally assumed that if a man has an opportunity to, it is expected that he will take advantage of women. This points to a deep contempt for men that is rife in society. What is ironic here though, is that this misandry towards Serge Benhayon did not come from the many hundreds of female clients who attend his sessions regularly – it mostly came from men and from the media.
I for one will not support this kind of baseless assumption about him or any man. Their actual tangible behaviour, and not a pre-conceived notion, is what I use to discern the men in my life. It is based on their choices and their character. And I know some amazing men who do not treat other men with this kind of contempt; who recognise true care because they know it in themselves.
And I celebrate the men everywhere who choose tenderness over hardness, and have the courage to choose care, love and responsibility over jealousy, hurt and blame. These are the men who are healing the deep distrust that the world has for men. These are the men who are quietly turning the tide. And their strength and dedication is just one of the many reasons why I will never stop loving men.
The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
Rebecca this is what can happen, it starts when we are children, it seems to be a generational occupation.
“but when you paint a woman as weak and mindless and stupid, you paint her out of the picture and out of the conversation altogether.”
This was my experience growing up, that girls should be seen, but not heard. I do not blame my parents for this, as my father was brought up to believe that women were second class citizens and this is why it continues generation after generation until we realise that women have an equal place along side men.
You ask a very good question Rebecca
‘A friend recently told me of a popular Tantra guru who initiates his women devotees by doing them the favour of allowing them to have sex with him?! Wow! Why aren’t the current Serge-haters on a crusade to ‘bring down’ that guy?’
My take on this is that the Tantra Guru has not disturbed the consciousness that prevails in our society, so is not seen as a threat. Serge Benhayon exposes the abusive consciousness that we are all choosing, in the exposure we have been given a different choice. What we do with the choice is up to us. If enough people choose to make changes to their lives by becoming more honest with themselves, heal their hurts etc., this changes the balance of energy and when this occurs the prevailing abusive consciousness uses bullying tactics to shut down the source of change. It has been all out trying to stop Serge Benhayon for years now; it cannot shut down the source because the source is the universe and nothing can shut that down. We are being shown through everyday life that we have been lied to on every level the choice is ours whether we believe it or not. To me it’s not about Serge Benhayon it’s about the energy he is aligned and obedient to, That’s what the abusive consciousness wants to shut down. So then the question has to be why is the abusive consciousness so hell bent on squashing the truth, if it has nothing to hide?
“And I celebrate the men everywhere who choose tenderness over hardness, and have the courage to choose care, love and responsibility over jealousy, hurt and blame. These are the men who are healing the deep distrust that the world has for men. These are the men who are quietly turning the tide. And their strength and dedication is just one of the many reasons why I will never stop loving men.” Most beautifully said.
When a man wears his heart on his sleeve it is time to consider that life will eventually open to where we all openly live with the true fragility and tenderness that is innate with-in all equally.
It is not gender thats the main variable that accounts for keyboard abusing, but movement. You can only go there, if your movements are not just governed by a tremendous unsettlement inside, but also by the tension this creates, which you try to get rid of, by sharing it graciously, without realizing that this only feeds back to you, in addition of harming others.
What a great celebration of the tenderness and care men can bring and in fact naturally are, and yes a huge appreciation for all who stand up and call out abuse where-ever they see it.
When a man is in his heart, it brings an enormous beauty to this world. His solidness is a blessing. We all know he is there and will be there always for us.
Great blog Rebecca, it is beautiful to see men choose to be gentle and tender, and I love how they are going against the ‘norm’ of how men are perceived to be in today’s society.
Keyboard cowards with their unrestricted and unrestrained abuse are increasingly becoming a detriment to our society so much so that all governing bodies can no longer ignore its harmful ripple effect which is devastating to far too many of us in its wake of destruction.
This is such an interesting piece of writing and deeply reflective of the larger picture of what’s happening in society with and between both genders. And how Serge Benhayon, a man of deep integrity that doesn’t use or abuse women has become a target for attack, perhaps by others who themselves cannot stand such a reflection of integrity when their own needs work. How normal must abuse be when it’s defended by attacking a man who does not abuse?
Keyboard cowards abound in cyber space and their outpourings are founded on their unhealed deep hurts. The assaults might appear to give momentary relief and reprieve from the pain but this beast demands frequent feeds (repeat abuse) and thus, the wounds keep festering.
Hear, hear Rebecca . . . you say it straight just how it is. You have exposed all that needs exposing in this brilliant piece of writing . . .the archaic attitudes the press hold toward both women and men. . . the inability some men have to accept their part in a relationship breakdown and jealousy that gets direct at anyone who is treating another in the way we should be treating each other as a given – with the absolute respect and the highest integrity that Serge Benhayon as made his norm.
“the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice.” It is the deeply ingrained prejudices that are exposed and challenged by Serge Benhayon that cause a reaction in those who are not prepared to know the truth.
Thank you Rebecca for calling it as it is. We all know truth, and when we hear it, we feel the depth of it within ourselves – and the extent to which we ourselves have or haven’t called it out.
Thank goodness there are men who are now living this way, ‘ I celebrate the men everywhere who choose tenderness over hardness, and have the courage to choose care, love and responsibility over jealousy, hurt and blame. These are the men who are healing the deep distrust that the world has for men. These are the men who are quietly turning the tide.’ This is so needed and such a blessing for all.
Absolutely, no amount of abuse is acceptable, ‘As women, we are in good company when there are men that are man enough to say that no amount of intimidation and abuse towards women is acceptable.’
It is very sad there are so many men (and women) who live in a way that totally contradicts their true essence and we think that is how they are naturally, and they themselves do not even realise that is what’s they are doing. I certainly didn’t know that myself.
All-time blog (should have its own website) about what it is to be a true man, and how society has shaped us. Both men and women are responsible for how men are today we cannot deny that. If we closely looked deeply into our relationships there is an abuse of some kind – I know many times I have been guilty of that but not meaning it so it is just how it was. All because I was not honoring the deeply loving tender sensitive man I was / am.
Many pearls of wisdom, sentence after sentence from an amazing woman Rebecca Baldwin, who is one of many leading the way in revolutionary defining Women’s Health (http://www.esotericwomenshealth.com).
All this came about from a group of men trying to deface a real man leading the way in bringing relationships back to love and evolution, and not the deep-seeded arrangements based on need we are all suckers for. A must read again and again – much to be gained!
Thank you Rebecca, you are showing us that there is never ever a reason to hate or mistrust someone based on another experience you had in life. This opened my eyes, that I have looked with judgement and that I held quiet judgement towards man, simply because I had some experience with men before that were very unloving and deceitful. Hence. I better work on these instances and heal them, and always be open to every men I meet. Never to close up my heart again. Simply letting go it is. And I trust this might support other too.
Thank Rebecca for sharing this, it is great exposure on the nonsense been spread about Serge Benhayon. Everyone who as met him or been to any of his presentation will know he has most love and integrity for humanity. He is sharing with everyone how he has improved his health through his loving choices. He is not out to break any families.
I deeply appreciate the balance you have brought to this blog Rebecca – that it is in no way ‘all men’ who can be painted with such a brush, and that there are indeed men who do not need to put down or falsely label women. The painting of female students of Universal Medicine as some ‘blind’ or ‘stupid’ followers – essentially ‘automatons’ as you’ve said, is so off the scale ridiculous – yet what an insidious tactic, designed to render nought the voices of women who know the truth of the integrity at play here, to the bone…
We could say then, that the man who needs to so falsely label others, or diminish his partner as you described, is not a man claimed in himself. He is not a man who holds others, including women, as equal to he, and one who due to what he has refused to deal with within, plays out such dominating and ill behaviours. It’s well time that we collectively said ‘no’ to such behaviour. It does not represent the capacity we all actually hold within – to express and behave with love, and nothing less.
Your words here Rebecca, about control preferring to see control, even where there is none, resonate deeply. How hurt is the man who cannot bear to let himself see the truth of another man living in and by a deeper integrity than he? And then needing to pull out one of the classic armaments of control, i.e. to invent, fabricate and completely misconstrue the truth of that man – essentially, attempt to obliterate the ‘enemy’ of his tightly held dominion.
It is really sad that these men have such a horrible presumption about other men. Their thoughts must be dark indeed if they presume the worst of every man. We are so blessed to have some really awesome men around us and especially blessed to have Serge Benhayon inspiring all who appreciate what he brings.
An extraordinary piece of writing that exposes the rot spread about Serge Benhayon as well as that about women associated with UM by those who indeed see through the veil of their own prejudice… The truth needed to be highlighted alongside the reiteration that no amount of intimidation and abuse towards women is acceptable… to chip slowly away at the misogyny that permeates our society.
The men I know amongst the students of Universal Medicine have been an enormous healing ground for me — because now I know the truth about every man. The tenderness that is there, the care they innately have. So now, any time I interact with a man, I can see them, the real them, underneath the armour o protection so many men carry as they bustle up to be something they are actually not in our world today. I have let men in, I have let humanity in, and that is because of one man’s love for humanity that knows no bounds and no limits. That man is Serge Benhayon.
This is brilliant Rebecca, all men have a responsibility, as do women to hold every other in respect as an absolute equal. It seems inevitable if one does not have respect and love for oneself it is impossible to convey this in truth to another… and instead we get bastardised versions of love and intimacy, which in reality are no more than fulfilling needs and social arrangements that we contract with each other to not rock the boat. And so when a man comes along and exposes the emptiness and self-delusion of these games, there may be some who will put up a fight to resist the truth that inevitably must one day come to them. Far better to choose honesty and start to admit to ourselves the games that we play.
It is truly something to celebrate the men in the world who are choosing sensitivity and love over hardness and protection in their daily living. These men are beacons of light for all men and women and they are growing in numbers every day.
There is an enormous amount of healing that has has to be done and men choosing tenderness over hardness and sharing this with each other is an important step towards getting balance back in our world.
I love this blog Rebecca, thank you. This part stood out in particular for me today – “…how far has the mark of decency been moved when misogyny is not even seen as such?” – pause for thought with that one.
As a woman I have never felt more respected than by Serge Benhayon. He has presented how sacred and precious we are, how important it is that we self nurture, and his daughter Natalie is leading the way in Women’s Health and well-being. It is weird that he should ever be a target for any accusations of wrong doing when there is not a shred of evidence to support the claims.
It’s so true what you write here Rebecca, not only is this an attack on women but equally on men as well. To portray women as weak is the obvious abuse but to then portray men as having in their nature being agressive or always wanting to dominate or take advantage of women is the unspoken abuse that also carries on. This tactic plays right into the perceptions we carry that because one has hurt us or acted in an unloving way then all are tarred with the same brush. When we shut off from the first unloving movments we experience we are left in those memories without being able to see before us the way people are now and that not everyone chooses to act in the excact same way. Which had been true of Serge Benhayon he is like no man I have ever met and from his inspiration I have experienced many more men who are choosing to be Gentle-Men.
Great call Rebecca. Your very last paragraph reveals the deep issues at play. Women, and men, in their power are so very needed. And those that aren’t afraid of the intimidation, harassment and even abuse that can be experienced are slowly turning this around and reminding us that we are powerful and we do make a difference.
“The amazing and deeply disturbing truth is that were he a Tantra guru, he would not be as highly scrutinised as he is now.” This is disturbing and part of so many other things that we allow each other to do like eating fast food, trashing ourselves with alcohol etc. Most people are more allowing of that than of people making loving food choices or like Serge Benhayon truly supporting people to live a supportive life.
Great article Rebecca. It is great to expose the deep mistrust of men that is in our society and that men don’t even trust themselves, so far have we allowed men to be degraded from knowing their natural way of being.
Yes Rebecca, it is important to see the men that are living in a different, honouring and loving way and to deeply appreciate them as it is very easy to just go and see men as they are often prescribed by the media, stereotypes etc.
Go men! There are many lovely, kind, beautiful men and it is way past the time that they should be recognised as such. It is sad that because of the awful behaviour of men who do not honour themselves and therefore do not honour others, that all men are tarnished with suspicion and a truly honest and honouring man is presumed the opposite.
I can understand why dishonourable men would react badly when they are called on their behaviour but I really am surprised in this climate of saying no to abuse that the media have jumped in to support them. I supposed I should not be surprised, as the instances of murdered abused women rate a small mention way past the front page of their newspapers.
“but when you paint a woman as weak and mindless and stupid, you paint her out of the picture and out of the conversation altogether.” A man who does this is often afraid of women and feels to put her down to disempower her. Serge Benhayon empowers women to be their true selves.
“A man that respects women naturally gets the respect of women.” This seems so simple and yet so true in my experience.
Yes, when you have had the pleasure to meet such a tender, caring, gentle man they are unforgettable.
There are not many articles that present so well the strength of embracing your tenderness, your care and your love, but that is who we truly are as men, that is how we naturally express from our essence. Such qualities cannot but benefit us all, so why is there so much resistance to someone presenting what it truly means to live in this way with all?
What a breath of fresh air this article is. I remember when I first attended a course held by Universal Medicine, the thing that I clocked straight away was there was a reasonable number of men present. This I noticed as different to anything I had noticed in other healing courses or workshops I had attended, where there may have only been one or 2 in attendance. Why is it then that Serge is being highlighted for having so called “female followers” when there are many many other course, workshops etc who attract mostly women? There has been definitely more than meets they eye here. Sensationalism that does not make sense.
Wow Rebecca! Awesome!
Gosh I love the you write Rebecca. You write with such power, grace, humility, love and you question and challenge what you see around you. Firmly putting back into place what needs to be. Thank you.
‘A man that respects women naturally gets the respect of women. Does this cause jealousy amongst other men? Sadly, it is a given.’ Unfortunately this is true, and exposes exactly what is going on here in the case of these ‘keyboard cowards’.
‘Men who use text messages, emails and blogging to debase, harass and intimidate their former partners, and when they are called to account they act as though it’s ‘dramatic’ to call this abuse.’ This is such a game. Redefining the meaning of abuse within their own minds, so they do not have to take responsibility for being abusive.
Stunning Rebecca thank you. It is because of magnificent men like Serge Benhayon and my many gentle and loving male friends and family that I too deeply love men.
Since meeting Serge Benhayon I have let out the powerful woman I am. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I was ever meek and mild, but I was a lot more so prior to meeting Serge. He is actually doing the opposite to what the media is saying, which brings me to the question, why is the media reporting the absolute lies they are? As a society how have we not called to account the irresponsibility of the media?
Brilliant article Rebecca. I love how you have read past what is on the surface to the somewhat accepted misogony in society. A few men and the media saying Serge is brainwashing women is only horrific because of the part that there is someone supposedly doing such a thing. The part where women can be brainwashed is not questioned.
There is tenderness, sensitivity and love in all men but only a few are choosing to express this to others. Thank goodness the work of Serge Benhayon is giving men permission worldwide to express all that is naturally within and in time this will change the world.
There is too often a divide put between men and women, but the divide should really be between those who accept acting abusively as normal and those who do not accept it. The men who are willing to not accept it are indeed inspiring and worth supporting with all we have to give.
My heart is glowing after reading this stunning love letter to men. Thank you Rebecca. I have been given a moment to take stock and appreciate the absolute beauty and tenderness that has been demonstrated by Serge Benhayon and the men that have been inspired by him.
Keyboard cowards act in a way that has total disregard to the collateral damage they inflict on men, women and children. “how far has the mark of decency been moved when misogyny is not even seen as such?” Serge Benhayon inspires many men through Universal Medicine to turn the tide to true respect and equalness for women and men everywhere.
I’m glad I came across this awesome piece of writing Rebecca — simple powerful truth and your love for men, for humanity, shines through.
When you haven’t got any truth on a person then lies have to be created to muddy the truth. Our movements reveal our truth as the saying goes ‘actions speak louder than words’. But what this blog has highlighted is that these words have been given far greater attention and focus, why? What is it about the truth that is so painful?
What an awesome writing, thank you Rebecca. I celebrate those men too and I will for many lifetimes.
“It seems we live in a world where it actually takes courage to speak up for women. You will certainly run the risk of being in the line of fire if you do. Often we see men ostracised for breaking some kind of imaginary allegiance to other men, but perhaps really it is because they show other men up.” Good point Rebecca.
I love the clarity of your post and especially your last paragraph – “And I celebrate the men everywhere who choose tenderness over hardness, and have the courage to choose care, love and responsibility over jealousy, hurt and blame. These are the men who are healing the deep distrust that the world has for men. These are the men who are quietly turning the tide. And their strength and dedication is just one of the many reasons why I will never stop loving men.” Here, here.
An A grade dissection of the actions and intention to why men lie the way they do.
I love your powerful blog, the conclusion and I agree: “And I celebrate the men everywhere who choose tenderness over hardness, and have the courage to choose care, love and responsibility over jealousy, hurt and blame. These are the men who are healing the deep distrust that the world has for men. These are the men who are quietly turning the tide. And their strength and dedication is just one of the many reasons why I will never stop loving men.” Realizing now very subtle mistrust and prejudice, I still have for men and how this plays out in my measured and protective behavior with them. That’s an eye (deeper) opener here today, I am grateful for. I will go deeper with me now and will remember your powerful conclusion, why you will never stop loving men.
It is amazingly stunning for me that men are capable of behaving so abusive as described and experienced by you, Rebecca. I, too, have my share of experience of this. Never before have I seen such a humble approach as Serge Benhayon chooses. He doesn’t judge and decides to work dedicating every second of his life until abuse amongst mankind ends.
Rebecca, thanks for putting forward your views which have a lot for both men and women to take note of. There is so much to reflect on in your blog but one part that stood out for me was the fact that those men persistently crying out that Serge Benhayon is exploiting female students, who are all assumed to be ‘stupid’, are not just attacking a few women, but are attacking all women including their own female family members. They are also denigrating all men by assuming that all other men think similarly to themselves. As you say, you know this is not the case and I too would add my voice here and say that I also know many men who honour themselves and women as equals.
Thank you Rebecca for being the voice of every woman. Sadly not every woman allows themselves to connect to the truth of all you have so accurately exposed here, however each and every one of us has that choice available to us in every moment.
This declaration I also sign with my heart.
Yes Giselle, I agree. Sadly many women have resigned to being abused, resigned to believing that’s the way it is. How awful that this is a reality — how does this impact one generation of women after another? We just need to look around us to see what’s happening to young women these days to know that the well-being and self-worth of women is not healthy. We have a lot to answer for in what we allow and don’t allow, for every choice we make, loving or abusive, is a reflection to others also.
Rebecca this post is absolutely awesome, powerful and direct. And this sentence sums up the magnitude of the ridiculous farce, and huge discrepancies, our society can be a party to: “The amazing and deeply disturbing truth is that were he a Tantra guru, he would not be as highly scrutinised as he is now.” Deeply disturbing indeed, when Serge Benhayon is so transparent, so open, so truthful, so loving, caring, warm and welcoming in everything he is, says and does and, that any TRUE scrutiny could only confirm his impeccable integrity and highest ethical intent.
I think you are right Rebecca there is among most men an underlying disrespect towards women. I feel this disrespect comes from a stubbornness to come to understanding women because of a refusal to understand themselves. I would also say that because it is accepted in society for women to honor their feelings and for men disregard their feelings in favor of their rational mind, there is jealousy there that feeling is the domain of women. Perhaps that is why men demean a woman’s feelings and treat their intellect as superior, merely because they are jealous that they have shut down their own feelings. There also seems to be an underlying unspoken code passed down through the ages that men have greater entitlement. Most men have done little to address this and women feel hurt by that. Through Universal Medicine and with tenderness respect and understanding people have come towards the best of their gender.
In Universal medicine men women and children are treated equally with a deep level of care respect and understanding I have not found anywhere. The Esoteric healing I have participated in is sacred. This means we connect on a soul level where there is no gender. If a woman is physically attractive to me I must purge out those thoughts from my mind before the sacred healing can take place. As Rebecca as stated if the healing requires my hand on her heart, my fingers are up and in no way in contact with her breast, it is completely non sexual. Women (and men) are encouraged to abort the healing if they feel in any way imposed on. The feeling in the room is exquisite stillness. I would not have believed it was possible unless I experienced it, so I fully understand Rebecca’s comment: “The fact is, it is almost universally assumed that if a man has an opportunity to, it is expected that he will take advantage of women.” For some people it is difficult to comprehend this level of absolute integrity. Is it wrong that a woman feels like she deserves the same respect from her partner? How can she describe the feeling without the partner getting Jealous? Jealous of the deep connection he may conjure up thoughts there was something sexual going on when there was not.
The amount of time wasted on trying to bring down a guy that is doing such incredible work within the smaller Lismore community and well as the wider Australian community as well as the world wide community is a horrendous act within itself. There are too many time wasters out there when there are so many more critical things to be putting energy into.
A super powerful and insightful article Rebecca. I had never heard the word ‘misandry’ nor thought of this issue in this way but here you present absolute truth, of an ingrained prejudice of men playing out. There are so many charismatic male leaders who actually do perpetrate harm that have not attracted denigration by men. Yet when one man works with absolute purpose and integrity, inspiring Women to deeply nurture and care for themselves as a foundation of living their lives, he attracts suspicion and contempt from other men. There is jealousy and it exposes the lack of care and respect they are living in.
Serge Benhayon lives as a constant source of inspiration for men and women alike to ‘choose tenderness over hardness, and have the courage to choose care, love and responsibility over jealousy, hurt and blame’.
I just love this blog, deeply, so powerful, truthful and joyful. I have known Serge Benhayon and the work of Universal Medicine for 13 years and I know for a fact that he is gentle, deeply caring and lives with awesome intrgrity. It is true many people have chosen to “misconstrue his work as being part of some massive conspiracy to breed himself an army of submissive automaton women to use for his own self-gain. But the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice.” This quote is very poignant, It is degrading for both men and woman alike to marginalise and label women ‘automaton’. I have had this accusation raised towards myself, because of my connection with Universal Medicine, it is shocking and the intention is degrading, it does not respect or honour the wisdom, courage, intrigrity and true free will I live with every day as a vital, powerful and loving woman.
Great blog, Rebecca! I am also blessed to know many beautifully tender, caring and loving men that do not abuse others with their ‘power and might’. The media should be interviewing them for their inspirational stories of choosing love over hardness and abuse – the world needs to know that there is another way.
Rebecca you are are fantastic writer, thank you for this piece. I can only assume that the men in reaction to the true gentlemanly ways of Serge Benhayon feel the truth of their own relationship to women being shaken up, i.e. their mysoginistic attitude of superiority and control to maintain a sense of false power over women. You have exposed much of the misogyny going on, but also highlighted the truly beautiful men that abound and how needed they are in this society.
Great blog Rebecca. I love how it illustrates how we all have pre programmed insecurities and patterns that can be exploited with the use of the right words and scenarios hence the power of ‘keyboard cowards’ (awesome term by the way). But what you share also reminds me of the fact that there is always truth and inspiration all around us and available 24/7 to those who choose to see it.
Thank you Rebecca for this wonderful piece! Abuse is a common currency that human beings resort to when they deal with each other. Unfortunately, it is not always seen as such and, even worse, it is often times justified based on ‘higher truths’ (e.g., women are less than men). These ‘higher truths’ which in truth are neither ‘higher’ nor ‘truths’ constitute nonetheless the fabric of the shared understanding of the ‘natural’ order of things. So, when a man (God forbids) ‘betrays’ this code he gets all the fury of the guardians and speakers of the status quo. As you well say Rebecca, it is seen as an act of high treason that deserves no mercy (just in case it may inspire others both male and female).
Rebecca, You are such a passionate writer and researcher. I am inspired to be fully supportive of the wonderful men that I know in my Life and those I have met in passing. It is time for us as women to stand up and be counted and not seen as “stupid, easily manipulated” and ” mindlessly” following a Guru, but as the truly amazing people we are! Thank you for such an inspirational Blog.
Thank you Rebecca for such a powerful blog, and thank you to Serge Benhayon for being a true reflection of the love and tenderness that resides in every man, seen and unseen.
it is a sad reflection on society that these ‘Keyboard Cowards’ have been allowed to get away with misogyny and that it is not only accepted but acted on in words thought and action. Today we are starting to get a different reflection – one of the value, tender and nurturing women supporting their families, friend and society. This is supported by the many amazing men bringing their awareness and speaking up and on behalf of women. Thank you Rebecca for bringing our awareness and celebration of these men. I too, will never stop loving men.
Written with such power, truth and integrity Rebecca, this is the type of article the media should be printing, thank you for representing the misrepresented, it is time the truth be told!
It is really ridiculous that men have have built a way of life that have made women mistrusting to men, this way of living has to be stopped because the world needs to have decent human relationships. I completely agree with you Rebecca Baldwin, that we have to celebrate the men that choose to live as true men because they will make the change that are so needed in our human relations. We need true men to show the world that there is another way, a true way how men actualy are, lovely, tender and as sweet as women.
Thanks for a wonderful article Rebecca that exposes how cowardly the tactics used by these keyboard cowards really are. As Simon commented earlier, these attacks are continuing today (3 years after this article was written) and we must all take responsibility to speak up against this behavior when we see it occurring.
I’m so inspired by the man that you mentioned standing up for a women he didn’t even know. And I agree, shouldn’t people be chasing up people like that ‘tantric guru’ who actually are doing things that we worry about and not attack a man (Serge Benhayon) who has proven time and time again to have the highest level of integrity?
This is great Rebecca and sharing all you have with the authority that you have, you are loving every man because every man needs to read this. There are some that will appreciate that they are not abusive and actually very tender and loving and others that may not be that, but you are teaching them how men really can be so whether they choose it now or later they have heard/read it.
It really is crazy why some people would make up lies about someone that really can’t be faulted just because they are jealous they do not live the same way. There is many other terrible cults and groups in the world, like you have mentioned Rebecca, that really need to be looked at and if we are to be truthful then we will easily see what is true and what is not.
This is an extraordinary article and an honour and a blessing to read. Full of so many exposing truths and inspirational gems that you could never be painted out of the picture no matter how hard they try! Weak, mindless and stupid I think not. Thank you for standing up against the misogynistic cowards who try to knock us down, and for appreciating and celebrating those that choose instead to inspire us.
You said it Samantha, weak! No way, the women of Universal Medicine are the strongest, most courageous, independent, and caring I have ever met. They are showing humanity a true way to live with grace and harmony.
Echo that Bernard! Women and men living with grace and harmony; true strength in each.
What a deeply profound article that exposes much in the most loving way and leaves me much to ponder on. It is indeed a sad world when one man who dedicates his life to leading the way in true health care is attacked. However the ripple effect from Serge Benhayon presenting on self-care, self-nurturing and self-responsibility is indeed ‘turning the tide’ in a way that is beyond revelatory and it is an absolute joy and honour to see, feel and be part of it.
Rebecca thank you so much for this powerful and insightful article and for appreciating the men who are “quietly turning the tide”.
“Keyboard Cowards”, pretty much sums up those people who use phones and computers to harass and intimidate others.
WOW Rebecca,
I can’t believe I missed this article until now. it is wonderful, inspiring and has me examining whether there is any mistrust I may still hold towards men. If both men and women continue to sit behind their fortified walls of mistrust where will we be?
Like you I have been fortunate enough to know Serge Benhayon and from him know many other lovely men who are unafraid to be open, loving, caring and appreciative, without imposition, of women, themselves and each other. It is so possible and it is the most lovely thing to be around such men. Thank you all of you, It has been beautiful and healing to read your comments here as well.
Exactly Jeanette, well well called. I agree with you. I can feel how I have go with the curent of disbelieving men being truly loving.. I have kept that ‘hurt’ against all men.. wow , that is a shocker. Yet I can feel the integrity, tenderness and true consideration some men that I know have, and there are for sure many more, it time to discern what I feel and not base my vision on hurts, needs , implication or believes. But to truly allow myself to be open to all men, because they are actually all equally loving as all women are all equally loving inside, even if this is not fully lived, it is always to be recognized, seen and felt.. knowing that one day it will be fully lived again. My respect for everyone is back, no matter what.
The keyboard cowards have continued their abuse for another 2 years following this article, albeit they have expanded their portfolio to other people, as well as criticising kids too. It’s not something that is likely to be stopped by some huge campaign, or a gagging order from the authorities, but rather by the kind of behaviour that Rebecca sees in the men that inspire her. Each of us could take responsibility for not allowing this behaviour to continue, and speaking out against it whenever the opportunity arises.
Very beautifully said Simon, i find this article very inspiring to stand more and more for the true man I am.
Awesome Benkt and a truly beautiful man you are.
Well said Simon, it is through inspiration that true change occurs
Rebecca your blog is great and so full of points I could write an essay in response! I also appreciate the many men who clearly and lovingly respect any women they meet, regardless of their relationship to them. And for that reason (among many others) I also have great appreciation for Serge Benhayon. You’re right about the jealousy – men can resent other men who are behaving in the way they know they should and could themselves, but don’t. Yet instead of looking at their own stuff and changing the way they behave towards women, they choose to attack men who do the right thing.
I’ve experienced this jealousy in relationship with men – especially of those who were respectful of me, and particularly of someone who’s a role model like Serge Benhayon. Just because I appreciate a man for his respectfulness and presenting on true love, doesn’t mean I’m in bed with him! I agree that this propensity for disrespectful men to put a sexual implication onto other woman-respecting men is a real turn-off and is degrading to not just women but to all men. I, too, have met friends who were involved with Tantra gurus who manipulate and misuse women and I can state with confidence that Serge Benhayon is definitely not one of those. Like you Rebecca, I will not stop loving men, though I have become much more discerning in who I choose to be intimate with for myself.
Thank you Rebecca for this awesome article. You make a lot of good points, not least that ‘But the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice. Men who behave in a controlling way will only see control.’ This is very true. For one to see past their prejudices, one first has to take responsibility for their choices and for a lot of people that is not an easy thing to do. I am sure every man knows when they are being abusive to women. What will help is having the courage to start to look at their deep pain and hurts.
Top post Rebecca Baldwin and I have learnt a few things here myself. I never knew that a tantra woman devotee has sex with the tantra guru to initiate herself. That is very disturbing and well worth investigating.
I agree Rebecca when you cannot find anything on a man who is clear and transparent inside and out then you have to drum up lies.
Serge Benhayon talks about the integrity he lives, in his book 3, and holds the highest conduct and integrity I have ever found in any man in this world.
I am no follower or fool. I simply apply what I have learnt from Serge Benhayon and live my life by simply ‘getting on with it’.
Serge Benhayon makes things simple and practical and includes everyone equally. I reckon that is why I am still around.
Such a well written and on point blog, thank you Rebecca you rock!
Timely for me to read this as I’ve recently begun looking at past relationships with men in my life, which have been tumultuous to say the least!
Men to me were to be feared, controlled or placated. I believed that all men wanted, was sex and they’d lie, cheat, bully, or just take it if they chose. How sad that I felt this way for over 40 years… Right up until I met Serge Benhayon during a Universal Medicine event.
Serge has presented me with a whole new understanding of what ‘being a man’ is. Tender, transparent, full of integrity and above all truthful.
Nothing stupid or mindless about me. What I am, is an amazing woman that has, with the unconditional love and support of Serge Benhayon, Universal Medicine, associated Practitioners and everyday people like myself, come to a place of knowing the true beauty of men and women.
I totally agree with your statement ‘Men who behave in a controlling way will only see control.’ And those who live love see love. I love your finishing statement that you will never stop loving men because of those who do truly live love.
Rebecca, your words are like a celebration and a confirmation that we can trust, when we resolve our own hurts and misgivings. A great reminder to love all that is beautiful about men. Thankyou.
Wow!! Another articulate and amazing article that covers everything. You are a never ending source of inspiration. Mary-Louise Myers
Really lovely and well said.
Excellent article Rebecca, thank you!
Somewhere along the line, men have given themselves a bad wrap. But you called it, men have called it, women have called it and it is now the catalyst for the change for men and women to just be equal in their beauty and tenderness. Absolutely brilliantly written article, thank you for getting it out for us all to ponder.
Awesome Rebecca, and yes I once was very weary of men and can still be at times, but through the gentle loving way of some men I know, I am getting a truer understanding of who men really are when they are simply allowed to be and called to be all they are, men have such a gentle and caring way about them and this shines when they feel confident enough in themselves to share this with others. Thank you Rebecca
Yes– that is totally true Toni. We talk about the denigration of women but men are taught to toughen themselves from their natural tenderness from a very young age — and this is a huge ill that is not often explored.
Thanks so much Rebecca for expressing and exposing with so much clarity what I and the world hold in our attitudes towards men. I had no idea until I read this how much distrust I still have of men. And to now ponder on men themselves feeling the same about other men expands my take on life and society too. This is awesome.
This is truly amazing! Such a loving words. Very very beautiful chosen subject, Thank you for puting this subject out there. Much much appreciation ..
Thanks Rebecca for this contribution, you brought so many things to my awareness , greatly appreciated
Truly Beauty-full Rebecca. Deepest thanks
Amazing Rebecca, I am deeply touched by your love and clarity. You expressed what I always have felt but never could put my finger on: me feeling ashamed and guilty for being a man – that I can´t be trusted by a woman – without actually doing any harm to a woman that would justify these feelings.
In the wake of this stigma are the mistrust towards other men (actually my fellow brothers) and a resentment towards women (actually my fellow brothers) that wants to strike back for the constant “blame” I (men) have to live under, therefore the permanent pressure to prove that I am actually trustworthy. It´s a cycle of guilt, blame, resentment and mistrust that you expose and that we can stop so easily by being honest and tender again, allowing ourselves to feel the natural love and caring we have for each other and long for so much. Thank you.
Alex, your words have touched me deeply – thank you.
Alex thank you for your comment. I have been a woman who mistrusts men and I didn’t even realise it. On the surface I would have said that men and women are equal but dig a little deeper and there is a different belief being lived. I have never had a relationship with a man beyond dating and it never made sense to my friends and family (and even to me) why such a lovely woman was single…was she gay? At the same time I longed for the ‘one’ who would come and sweep me off my feet. Despite having four brothers and my dad, generally the only male company I felt comfortable with was gay men, priests and some married men. I explained this to myself as shyness, not feeling worthy of a man or confident enough to stand up for myself in a relationship. I didn’t want to become a doormat and it was easier to avoid relationships all together rather than face what was running underneath for me. When I read your comment to Rebecca’s powerful article I could name clearly for the first time that I have held a deep distrust of men. There has been no physical or sexual abuse in my life yet I avoid being with men and when I am, I may act comfortable, but if I am honest, I definitely am not. It is like there is a gauge in me that flicks to warning around most men and I have lived my life heeding that alarm never questioning it despite the many tender, lovely, caring men around me who confirm that men can be safe. Equally I have met men with a distrust of women believing that women do not love men for who they are but for their bank balance and what they can get from a man during marriage and moreso in divorce. I can also ironically put my hand up for this too. Even whilst keeping men at a distance I was aware of their status financially, socially and physically and with unbelievable speed measured their possibilities for partnership even if only in my head. It never felt good to do so but it was an automatic response to meeting a man, or even hearing about a man I hadn’t met. What a mess. It is time to expose the destructive and insidious interferences to brotherhood between men and women and to begin to allow the expression that is so naturally there to be without imposition.
Wow Adrienne thank you so much for sharing and especially this ‘It is like there is a gauge in me that flicks to warning around most men and I have lived my life heeding that alarm never questioning it despite the many tender, lovely, caring men around me who confirm that men can be safe.’ This resonates with me and I am only now starting to recognise the damage this has done to my relationships because of how guarded I have been in the past. Starting to feel safe enough to allow other people in has transformed my life, but is an ongoing process and as I trust myself more I also trust others more.
Awesomely said Alex, yes we are all the same underneath — amazing what constructs and how our mis-education of what it is to be a ‘man’ or a ‘woman’ keeps us from simply being who we are.
Fabulous Rebecca, thank you.
This is bloody awesome Rebecca! You’ve called it as it is and given men something to deeply consider. How can we expect abuse against women to cease globally if we can’t sort it out in our own backyard. Guys let’s face it, if we want women to love us, we’d be mad not to take Rebecca’s advice. It’s never too late to swallow our pride and make changes.
Fantastic Rebecca! The questions you have posed are very important ones and deserve to be looked into further. You have expressed so beautifully the issues that are coming between true equality for men and women, and are holding us back from truly living in harmony. Thank you.
Hi Rebecca-Awesome. You are absolutely correct in saying that there is a deep mistrust of men in society and that there is an assumption that if a man is left alone with a woman he will abuse her. I used to have that same belief. This has changed over the past few years because I have been fortunate enough to have loving, caring, tender men around me-Serge Benhayon included. It strikes me as interesting that these “keyboard cowboys” as you call them are mainly men and the media. Given that they have relied so heavily on that assumption that all men are bastards and cannot be trusted to try and bring Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine down I can’t help but wonder what are they actually saying about themselves here. It is certainly not my experience that all men cannot be trusted.
Rock on Rebecca…..such clarity, power and deep wisdom……Thank you
Thank you Rebecca, straight to the real issues at hand here. How come it takes us to point this out, media needs to do much better due diligence when following up leads and get to the real truth – then share this with society.
The time has come for the truth to be claimed and claimed and claimed and here is a perfect example….thank you.
My body is also absolutely saying that it will never stop loving men as I too know many who are ever so tender, caring, loving, gentle, graceful, strong and expressive.
Oh Rebecca! Simply Graceful.
This is so absolutely beautifully written, Rebecca!
Wow Rebecca,”But the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice” this says it all.thank you
Elizabeth
Beautiful Rebecca, so very well expressed and I too recommend Serge based on his exemplary standards of conduct and care towards everyone, and especially in establishing a true regard for women, so that we can re-discover our natural glory and let that shine out on the world again. I too celebrate men who have connected to their exquisite tenderness and are not afraid to show it to the world. Its time to claim and treasure our love and tenderness, as the more we do, the more it exposes the hurt and hardness and provides a real opportunity for healing.
What an incredible take on this situation, Rebecca. I especially loved the line “But the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice.” You’ve really hit the nail on the head with this piece, and brought the truth to the surface so eloquently.
This is more than awesome, Rebecca, and how joyous to read that when this lady recognised your brother-in-law was treating her with more love and respect than her own partner, she was able to see the abuse she was allowing in her life.
I too celebrate the wondrous and caring men we have in the world.
May they inspire the men who are still hurting or have hardened themselves by building a shell over the natural tenderness they had as young boys so they could cope with life.
Thank you Rebecca. I hope there are many more who never stop loving men……and then just maybe men will realise that it is OK to love themselves and to ask for that same love from other men.
There is nothing more lovely than seeing men treat themselves and each other with true regard and tenderness — Yay to a world full of ‘bromance’ : )
Wow and thank you Rebecca! From every cell in my body…a resounding YES!
Thank you Rebecca. Your words resonate deeply within me.
This reminds me of an experience I had at lunch during a Universal Medcine Course. I was eating at table with 4 gorgeous men also doing the course. It was a rare moment in my life when I was with a group of men and I did not feel imposed upon or self concsious in any way. It was nothing they did or said but simply how they are and I had this overwhelming sense of how blessed I was to know them. I did not mention it at thetime but thank you Cam, Dean, Ray and Lee for being the real men you are.
Amazing article, so true and beautifully expressed – thank you Rebecca!
Fantastic Rebecca. Love this post and the truth you deliver. For those who know Serge and how he is during sessions and courses it is disgusting to read the lies, allegations and innuendos re sexual misconduct. Desperate people do desperate things as we know and think nothing of the harm they cause – their emptiness and need for attention is palpable and audible and indeed even written in black and white. Of course when attacking Serge or UM it is easy for us to see only that and attack back, as is human to do so, yet we all know they are just craving love, craving to be met, heard and truly seen for who they are instead of who they are not. We’ve perhaps all been there at one time or another, in one way or another (craving love) and now know that the greatest source of love is within ourselves and when we begin to feel that and live from there we know it is within all …..even those who pour hateful venom upon us. May love and compassion knock upon the door of their hearts.
This piece is jam-packed with beauty beyond words and bursting with facts.
Same here Jane – the last paragraph brought me to tears as I too felt that is why I will never stop loving men.
Thank you Rebecca for laying it down so neatly and spelling it all out so eloquently.
Awesome expression Rebecca. I too, am so inspired by these amazing men and some of their blogs which are reflecting “the men who choose tenderness over hardness, and have the courage to choose care, love and responsibility… …they are the men who are quietly turning the tide”, How beautiful for women and men to truly be meeting each other this way.
….and those men who are “quietly turning the tide”, do so with committed loving women right at their side. Thank you for this article Rebecca. Awesome.
Wow, Rebecca, you and your words are so inspiring!
Recently I allowed myself to feel that although my heart is completely open to women I have put up a “guard” when it comes to men. Some not as much as others – in truth there are very few I let in. This I am now willing to work through as true love has no boundaries and just is …. no place for “measuring”. I look forward to the day that I can stand side by side you and confidently declare that I too” will never stop loving men”.
Eloquently put Rebecca.
Wow great piece Rebecca.
Woah Rebecca! This leaves me speechless.
This article is not only a great point of view and an amazing subject to write about, the wording is incredible: “But the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice”. I love it!
Well said, Rebecca, I particularly pick up on your words ‘But the eye can only see through the veil of its own prejudice’. How sad that we are unable to see the truth of how life truly is because of our deeply ingrained prejudices. Having said that, your words imply that there is also hope. Slowly, one by one, we ARE changing, as we are inspired by the individuals who are breaking away from the ‘norm’. Eventually we will all see both men and women for who they truly are, and will honour ourselves and each other. The tide is turning . . .
So lovely, thank you Rebecca.