I Treat Myself With Love

by Anne Malatt, Australia

I have always loved to treat myself, to reward myself for working hard, to give myself something to make up for what I felt I was lacking, to substitute for love.

What were these treats?

  • When I was little, they were sweets. We were allowed one ice cream every Sunday morning, and that was our weekly treat. That was my religion – I looked forward to and savoured that moment of the week!
  • On birthdays, we had parties with sweet treats – fairy bread, blancmange, cake. I used to save some of my birthday cake to have for breakfast the next day ­– it was my favourite part of my birthday – a sweet treat to make up for the fact that it was no longer my special day.
  • As I grew older, the nature of the sugar changed – tiramisu, pavlova, champagne, chocolate, liqueurs – but in essence it remained the same.

Why the need for these treats?

I always felt cheated by life. I felt that somehow I had missed out, missed the point of it, that something was missing. Life never felt enough for me. I never felt enough for me.

As time went by, these sweet treats were never enough either. I was a bottomless pit of need. I could never get enough sweets to make me feel good. I got fatter, sicker, sadder, heavier, trying to fill the emptiness inside me.

There came a time when I knew I could not go on like this, that there had to be another way. I went searching for different ways to fulfil myself and finally, after a long hard road, with many false trails and dead ends, I found Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

There I learned that everything was inside me. That there was nothing outside that was greater than me. I learned to connect with the greatness in me through the simplicity of breathing my own breath. And through this connection I have gradually learned to listen to my body, which holds the living wisdom of everything I have ever lived and known.

In this way I have learned to truly treat myself. To treat myself with kindness, gentleness and loving care. To treat myself with the love I deserve, because I am love and I come from love.

And on the days when I struggle and go looking for sugar, I see that as a sign, showing me that I am not my true self, and an invitation to stop, go deeper, and come back to myself, where everything already is.

Now, every day is a treat. And every day I treat myself – with love.

I am forever inspired by the life and work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

173 thoughts on “I Treat Myself With Love

  1. Short but sweet Anne (pun intended!). I can so relate to this… I always had a sweet tooth and in later years began to use coffee, alcohol and over indulgence in food as my rewards and escape from life. Even though I’ve long given up coffee, alcohol and sugar, it’s still really obvious to me now when I’m not feeling enough just being me or that I’m wanting to avoid feeling or dealing with something, because I find myself heading to the fridge! It’s a stop moment to ask myself what is it that I need something else to ‘fill’ me up… And while I don’t always take the opportunity to stop, I’m much more aware of what is going on and what I’m choosing to avoid.

  2. I can relate to what you share here Anne, I have always used food as a reward to myself. Having let this pattern go with the support of Universal Medicine presentations, I can still feel there are times when I am looking for a reward in the way of food – this usually never works and I appreciate your reminder that this is a sign we are not being our true selves and what we are truly craving is treating ourselves with love and tenderness.

  3. “I learned that everything was inside me. That there was nothing outside that was greater than me.”
    This is the essential teaching that changes lives and that makes Universal Medicine so successful – it is gold!

  4. “I have learned to truly treat myself. To treat myself with kindness, gentleness and loving care. To treat myself with the love I deserve, because I am love and I come from love.”
    Thank you Anne for re-defining the phrase “treating oneself” to a much truer meaning. There is no outer reward that can make up for the lack of connection to the love we are.

  5. Anne this is very good medicine “To treat myself with kindness, gentleness and loving care. To treat myself with the love I deserve, because I am love and I come from love.”
    …..When we are not met by ourselves, it is impossible to be met by others.

  6. Knowing that we have everything we need, that everything is within us and there is no need to search, no need to fill ourselves with treats, is a beautiful revelation. Treating ourselves with love is the key. I know I always thought I was wrong even though I behaved as if I was right. There was no foundation of love for me, nothing solid that I felt but now I feel differently. So the need I have for the sweet things has diminished. Using any craving I get to realise that I need to come back to me is a great idea.

  7. The world has tricked us into believing that we are nothing, we are empty inside, we need to fill this emptiness with sweet treats or cigarette smoke. But we are not empty inside, we just forgot how to connect to the amazingness that is in there. The gentle breath meditation is a great step for re-establishing that connection to our true self. http://www.unimedliving.com/meditation/free

  8. Great awareness here as to why we feel we need to treat ourselves. I can relate to it a lot “I always felt cheated by life. I felt that somehow I had missed out, missed the point of it, that something was missing. Life never felt enough for me. I never felt enough for me.” If I don’t feel enough for me then of course I’m going to look to so-called ‘treats’ to fill me up. The beauty of the Way of the Livingness as presented by Serge Benhayon, and of which I am a Student, is that we learn to fill ourselves up from the inside until we are positively full to the brim with ourselves. This brings a whole new understanding and appreciation for the phrase, being ‘full of yourself’. Thrown as an insult when in truth it is our natural way of being, which has sadly been forgotten and replaced with an emptiness we then try to fill with whatever we can from the outside. All is never lost though – our fullness is still inside just waiting for us to reconnect to it. Its a simple choice.

  9. I am slowly learning that the greatest treat we can give to ourselves is self-love, and the greatest treat we can give to another is to openly share our love.

  10. Love what you have written here Anne, so simple ‘That there was nothing outside that was greater than me. I learned to connect with the greatness in me through the simplicity of breathing my own breath.’ We don’t place enough importance on breathing our own breath, something that I look at and work on each and every day.

  11. How often do we stop and consider ‘I crave that sweet (whatever) because I miss my own sweetness?’

  12. Thank you Anne, a beautiful recipe for life, to look at the ingredients that we choose in our everyday life. Choosing love and tenderness brings all the sweetness that we already are.

  13. I love what you have shared here Anne, treating ourselves with love is the key to deepening our self-worth and awareness and living from the quality and steadiness of our inner connection.

  14. We pretty much all have “TS” (Treat Syndrome) in some form or other… and TS is always a substitute for TSL ( True Self Love) which, once experienced will, as Anne writes, be the direction we will start to turn to.

  15. I love the simplicity in your and of what you are sharing. Life does not need to be hard and struggling, it just takes a few and consistent steps every day that allow us to see more of the sweetness that we are.

  16. Anne, what a blessing to read your blog. I have found when I eat sugary things my body feels tired and run down and everything starts to get harder and fall apart, yet when I treat myself with love suddenly there is an immense fullness which supports me. It is amazing the knock on effect each of our actions has. Say with sugar if I have a little bit I want more and the same with love! So the question arises do I want a tired, run down sugary body or do I want one full of love?

  17. So beautiful to re-read your blog Anne. I love this ” To treat myself with the love I deserve, because I am love and I come from love.” My inspiration for today. The more we love the more it magnifies.

  18. I have always been a sucker for a reward, for something to look forward to, it seemed to make everything else easier, as you know relief is coming. Slowly I am braking this mentality, I use to have it with coffee, I would really look forward to that cup, I would always go to the coffee shop once I had dropped the kids at school. This ritual or addiction it changed to decafe, then dandy but once I stopped having milky drinks, I no longer used it as a treat, I didn’t miss or crave the drink that I had planned my mornings around for 15 years. My drink just changed to herbal tea that I sometimes had. Its interesting that all the things that I have used as treats, have been things that aren’t that good for me, doesn’t make sense if they are suppose to be a reward.

  19. Imagine if everytime you went to treat yourself, maybe with something sweet or a gift or whatever, instead you treated yourself with kindness and true care, where could that lead? I reckon a week experimenting with this and your life will never be the same again…

  20. Anne I was addicted to everything what was sweet and therefore I love what you have shared so honestly in your amazing blog. I love this sentences as it confirms me in what I do as well if I have this craving for sweet things: “And on the days when I struggle and go looking for sugar, I see that as a sign, showing me that I am not my true self, and an invitation to stop, go deeper, and come back to myself, where everything already is.”

  21. “And on the days when I struggle and go looking for sugar, I see that as a sign, showing me that I am not my true self, and an invitation to stop, go deeper, and come back to myself, where everything already is.” this is great to remember to use the wanting of something sweet as an indication that we need to surrender and go deeper. In the past when I’ve given in to these cravings it feels like I’m building a wall in between myself and how I really feel.

  22. A lovely re read Anne. Thank you for reminding me that we are love and come from love and that those craving for “treats” that we feel we deserve are telling us to be more loving and self nurturing.

  23. Beautifully simple Anne, thank you. A great reminder to keep deepening our connection to the love we are within, no need to look outside ourselves for something sweet to treat ourselves with when we feel the fullness of our inner heart.

  24. This is an incredibly revelatory post Anne, of the majesty within that awaits us all. It so deeply true that whenever we are living in connection to our Soul we are eternally treated with the exquisite fulfilling quality of who we are that is simply Heavenly.

  25. Everytime I’m craving something sweet, I know I’m not connected to myself.. I’m feeling some kind of exhaustion or lethargy, because of the way in which I’ve been working and checked out, and I’m looking for something to pick me up again. When we truly stop and feel, we get to experience the way we’ve been living and what we’ve been driving our bodies with – it’s an opportunity to make different choices, so we don’t perpetuate more of the same.

  26. Hi Anne, love reading your blogs . . .“Now, every day is a treat. And every day I treat myself – with love.” . . . now love is a treat that is totally sustainable and doesn’t rot your teeth!

  27. I no longer eat cakes and sweets, but how and what I eat pretty much reveals where I am at with myself and it’s amazing how much I am relying on food to offset the nervous energy and exhaustion in my body.

  28. Like holidays we take in exotic locations once a year, for many being kind and loving themselves is an act that we do when we get ill or life gets out of control. What you show here Anne is Love is designed for us to live every moment we are alive. When we don’t, we build up a deficit just like a loan to a bank. It’s then just a matter of time till life asks us to pay it right back. One way or the other we are all eventually returning to live in a loving way everyday just as you describe.

  29. We can reward ourselves in many different ways to numb and distract ourselves, even having a cup of tea can be a reward. Therefore we have to be super honest and discerning as to what we choose is either supportive or rewarding to our body.

  30. “In this way I have learned to truly treat myself. To treat myself with kindness, gentleness and loving care. To treat myself with the love I deserve, because I am love and I come from love.” And what a beautiful and very powerful learning this is.

  31. Our whole being knows love and the more we feel what is true from our body the more we are able to connect to the love within us and bring this quality to the way we live.

  32. I love that you have developed the awareness to recognise that when you reach for sugar it is a sign you have disconnected from yourself and can choose in that moment to stop, come back to yourself and remember that you are more than anything you could ever put in your mouth.

  33. When we realise that we are what makes every day special, our connection to who we are, our Soul we come to know that there is already richness within that forever awaits to be lived. Through being honest with myself and how my body feels I have discovered that the joy from living in connection to my Soul, to the wisdom of Love from within me as best I can, far exceeds and is so much more lasting that the artificial buzz that comes from a sugar hit. I too and with you Anne as I am learning more and more every day to ‘…treat myself with the love I deserve, because I am love and I come from love.’ – so beautifully said.

  34. You write “every day is a treat” – how glorious and doesn’t it also point in the direction of the root cause of the worldwide obesity epidemic? We use food in the mistaken belief that it will give us something that we don’t already have and because food doesn’t deliver, we keep repeating it like an addicted gambler hanging out and thinking they will hit the jackpot one day.

  35. I love how you share “on the days when I struggle and go looking for sugar, I see that as a sign, showing me that I am not my true self, and an invitation to stop, go deeper, and come back to myself, where everything already is.” I also have moments when I go looking for sugar, and it’s great reminder to just stop and acknowledge that I am not my true self, and that I have choice in that moment to go deeper and come back to my Self without any judgement.

  36. ‘Life never felt enough for me.’ I can relate to this Anne – when life is only seen for what meets the eye rather than felt and observed for what is actually going on behind the scenes, it feels less and reduced. I find I want more, sweet, salty, carby, anything, to distract or numb the fact that I am living as a reduced version of myself. i.e. not being aware of energy.

    1. Great point Rachael, as I have am taken out by different tastes, which can cause me to over eat and end up with ‘a reduced version of my self and thus not being aware of energy.’

  37. The difference is vast in treating ourselves lovingly and in loving, treating ourselves with sweet treats..
    A great point Anne that when we choose sweets it is because we have not lived in the fullness of what we have connected to within. This I take into my day today and surrender to exploring why I pull away from living the vast, full, steady holding love I feel within.

  38. Life for me is opening up more from reading this lovely blog Anne. Thank you for sharing I feel privileged from the developing understandings I have reached from what you have presented. Sweet things in my life will never be the same. I also feel that whenever I need any type of taste sensation I will remember your blog.

  39. Just yesterday, I noticed how I thought I was entitled to have time just for myself – and it was indeed a mixture of needing to give myself deeply nurturing care and feeling missing out as I actually have not had any day off for a very long time, but the thing is I am settling in more at my new job getting on better with my colleague, relationships becoming more honest and deeper… I thought I was being more ‘me’ and what feels to me is that I am allowing myself to be taken over by something that thinks being who I am is a chore. Woa.

  40. So powerful Anne, “I learned that everything was inside me.” we are so well versed in looking outside of ourselves for love, support, what to do, what to eat, how to live. That we don’t foster that inner knowing that we have inside of us, which is such a shame because it really does hold all the wisdom in the world.

    1. Well said Reagan – we’ve got it all, yet the more we are distracted by looking outside of ourselves for answers or connection the less we will feel and register the fact that we are already all we’ve ever wanted.

  41. Some days things seem a little harder or more intense than others. However, on these days, the choice to be tender with my body is still there for me and when I choose to be tender, the intensity is thwarted, understanding rises and the absolute appreciation of my stillness is there under the very minor disturbance that has affected me.

  42. Interesting, the word ‘treat’ and how we can use it as an excuse to indulge when it’s true meaning is to give ourselves the care, time and space to nurture the inner qualities of who we are. The indulgence form seems like the fake meaning and a distraction away from the true quality of the word.

  43. In treating ourselves in a far more caring and loving way we start to value our true worth and change our choices that builds an inner steadiness from the connection we feel within our body that supports us to engage with and handle what life presents.

  44. Yes treating ourselves with love is totally different than what we usually think treating ourselves is. Having a sugary snack tastes good but makes us feel not so good afterwards in our body as it is not a true nutrition for the body, so in truth this is not a treat but something our body needs to recover from.

  45. “In this way I have learned to truly treat myself. To treat myself with kindness, gentleness and loving care. To treat myself with the love I deserve, because I am love and I come from love.” It’s not about saying no to treats but ‘yes!’ to treats of love, kindness, tenderness, gentleness, grace and honouring.

  46. Anne, just brilliant, thank you. And to feel how everyday can be a treat, just being us, and to know we come from love so of course we treat ourselves with love, such a great reminder this morning. Nothing less than love, and we can choose it anytime.

  47. When we think we are treating ourselves with love but the experience has not left us feeling loved, the fact that we do not feel loved is a testimony that we are love and we know love. So if we can simply choose to be loving again–even if others do not accept this from us, we can start being love with ourselves.

  48. Treating ourselves with love is the key to building a steady foundation and a loving commitment to being tender and caring with our body and the way we interact with everyone.

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