360 thoughts on “Bringing Self-care to Dentistry: 7 Steps to Returning to Love”

1. Rachel it was confirming to read this blog, and how far I have travelled in my own journey of being a woman. Yes there is more to go but where I used to be compared to ten years ago is very much different.

   I loved, “I don’t know” and saying “no” which is something I haven’t mastered yet, but certainly on its way. Letting go of those things that don’t belong and bringing those things that are “ALREADY INSIDE ME” to the forefront is the way forward for everyone, if they so choose to do so…

2. This is something I too can relate to – the placing of unrealistic goals upon myself and hence feeling crushed by not achieving them – but I too have learned to let go of this and instead know that true success comes from the quality we do things in rather than the what we have achieved.

   1. I was a master of making goals often unrealistic and if anything, they were unachievable. So it was a no wonder I was frustrated and I made it about others, when at the end of the day, the frustration was upon me for setting them on the first place.

      Now there are very few if any goals, once an expectation or investment sets in, then there are some ramifications. I’m learning to let go of how it needing it to be a certain way and go with the flow of what life has to offers, and then it becomes depersonalised and then I have more friends!..

3. “how can you truly care for another when you do not care for yourself?” – an age old and very wise question to ask!

4. “I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others.” This is something I’ve developed since I last read your blog, and also something I’m constantly learning. When I take on other people’s choices I disconnect from me, and when I am able to observe and give people space I also gift myself that same space – space to just be me.

5. I love your steps for returning to love; and, this is so true, ‘for how can you truly care for another when you do not care for yourself?’

6. We learn so much as we go through life, and can become wiser as we move forward, ‘I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others.’

7. This is just so helpful. I was just pondering on the frustration I often feel at work and how that is related to how much and how well I think I do, and this often brings in comparison with others, which makes it even worse – in that, I can feel how I am still pretty much caught in this relating and knowing myself through doing rather than being, and how much that gets in the way of truly appreciating myself and what I bring.

8. Learning to rest is super important. To rest is more that going to bed at night and having a ‘good’ nights sleep. I spend a lot of time in my day sitting at a computer and/or talking on the phone, so going for a walk in the afternoon is a great way for me to move my body, let go of anything I may be hanging onto from the day. I am about to have a 10 day break from work and my focus is going to be on developing a deeper quality of rest.

9. Doug, I have had a similar experience where my gum disease was pretty bad but with consistent care I have reversed much of it. And the more care I invest in the more wonderful and looked after I feel and then it just makes me want to care more and more for myself too!

10. Connection first, knowledge second becomes wisdom lived.

    1. Some small simple steps to assist us staying connected, ‘I now take responsibility for the quality of my being through:
       The breath I choose to breathe,
       The movement of my hands and arms,
       The tenderness of my fingertips,
       The way I sit in my chair and hold my body, and
       My conscious connection to my body and the task I am performing, equally.’

11. How is it that our studies at University or even at school and some colleges do not seem to really prepare us for living life in all that there is on offer and all that there is thrown to us? It is understandable that not everything can be covered in classes and at uni – there is much we learn on the job as they say. But what studies seem to focus on is purely the information and knowledge rather than a lived way of applying that information and knowledge whilst remaining connected to who we are. Perhaps this is the missing picture in education and life in general – but the real question is are we ready for this or are we just seeking to have the knowledge and be set with that?

12. Loved coming back to read this again, the changes you’ve made are truly inspiring. And great point that – “My tenderness and innate delicacy are my greatest strengths, not weaknesses to be overcome and ignored.”

13. “I used to think that I had an absolute obligation to squeeze people in, even as my body groaned under the weight of nervous system pressure this created.” Yes this is big in dentistry and I see many dentist fill their breaks with patients and work very long days. There is a lot of demand for dentists but we indeed should not forget that the quality we offer is equally as important as the work we do. And by overworking ourselves we will not be able to hold that quality so there is a responsibility there to care for ourselves.

14. Learning to rest ever, at all, let alone stopping during the day.. this has been a big one for me, and still a work in progress. It has always felt like there’s too much – so much – to do that I’ve never even wanted to stop because it felt like a waste of time. But the way I work is changing – working flat out doesn’t cut it anymore and isn’t sustainable, and I’m learning to work in a way where I do what I can, in line with what my body can handle. Often I’ll think ‘it’s too much’ or ‘I’m working for too long’ but there’s a big difference between these thoughts, and my reaction to them, and the simplicity of feeling this in my body and clear feelings to move on to the next thing, whether that’s another project, conversation or a moment to stop. The steadier and more consistent I am, the less I crave a moment to stop as a form of relief. Instead it becomes a moment to check in, feel how my body is, feel the quality in the way that I move, and bring the focus back to my movements more closely afterwards.

15. In our professional training we learn to reduce life to such an extent that we end up naturally assuming how life has to go and that it has to happen independently of what we have ourselves bought into.

16. “I believed that success and ease would be the natural outcomes of all the hard work I’d done. I had achieved great success as a student by pushing and driving myself: what I did not grasp was that my developed patterns of self-neglect and anxious drive had become an entrenched and normal way of operating”. This is amazing wisdom that every student, especially health professionals should read. I see this in the students I work with and notice that the highest achieving students are often the ones who are most anxious and stressed. This has shown me that ‘knowing stuff’ does not imbue you with confidence or ease, which is so important to help the client/patient feel settled and confident with you.

17. “I felt something deep within me begin to respond to the simplicity and love that Serge presented, and also lived himself.” “ .. and that the source of this truth was held inside the physical body – the body I had ignored for so long.” “ .. and that it starts with how I treat myself; and from treating myself lovingly, it naturally extends to others, no trying necessary!” A short synopsis of this blog — a true tale of how to find truth, live it for yourself and how to inspire others that will change the world!

18. Rachel, your words are certainly full — inspiring indeed. You’re a research project for all dentists, including many other professions, about how to live healthy and have fun at work while truly delivering. You’re a role model who is easy to be heard with a very strong connection to how expression needs to be delivered.

19. “This means that if I am being rough with myself, and disregarding in how I treat myself, then my patient and my dental nurse get that quality too.” This is a super important point, we like to think that we only hurt ourselves when we are rough or disregarding, but in actual fact by virtue of the way we treat ourselves we cannot help but treat everyone else the same.

20. Thank you for this blog as it’s very relative to any profession. The knowledge based way of life and the perfectionism we strive for is such a reduced way of serving people through our work, however this is the common and often expected way to be in work. I appreciated what you have shared here, that it’s about people first and the quality of care and love we can bring based on the quality of care and love we first offer to ourselves. I also noted this line “Using the ‘Our Cycles App’ has supported me in making a consistent commitment to observing my state of being and nurturing myself from this observation.” If have lived fairly disconnected from and unaware of our body, this app is truly supportive to bring that connection (and subsequent self nurturing) back to ourselves.

21. .. and adding to this, perfectionism is a great excuse to not take responsibility and be all that we are. When we’re trying to be perfect, we’re trying to control who we are, and how we’re perceived, which isn’t what humanity needs. Humanity needs all of us, in the raw honesty of just being who we are, fully in life and loving it, not caught up in our heads, distracting ourselves in the smallness of trying to be perfect.

22. Perfectionism is the antithesis to tenderness and restoring a connection with our bodies. It keeps us hard, cold and separated, stuck in our steely minds of determination and rigid control to get everything ‘right’. It feels like safety, but actually all it does is cut us off from ourselves and others. Letting go of perfectionism and instead choosing to focus on how we feel, and acting from there, feels freeing and expansive, and connects us back with the world again.

    1. Our education system is failing in many ways, ‘At university I learned that I was never enough, and perfection in what was done was the only way to be enough. Now, no matter what the situation at work, I can bring my full presence, care and nurturing’.

23. I agree Linda, these 7 steps Rachel wrote are super supportive and powerful for many professions.

24. What a blessing your patients receive Rachel, the way you live your life is very inspiring and invites other dentists to feel there is a different way to live that supports them in this challenging profession.

    1. A domino effect of inspirations abound when someone steps into true care for themselves.

25. This is so inspiring. I am no dentist, but there’s so much I can relate to and I am sure this applies to any profession, anyone anywhere. Not many of us grow up being confirmed that we are enough already, and living life from that place of knowing ourselves changes everything about how we experience life to be. And I agree – to be able to say ‘I don’t know’ without feeling less is totally freeing.

26. The fact that one relies upon his/her identification with a profession to value him/herself as a worthy human being, exposes the level of lack of self-worth a profession is called to deal with. The choice of a professional career is much more than what we pretend it is.

27. I have a doctor who is an extraordinary human being, he is a man of integrity, wisdom, care and is deeply philosophical about life. He is also a very skilled doctor which has supported me immensely, however the healing for me comes equally from the presence he brings to each consult. Yes, knowledge is essential but it’s only part of the healing process, what we bring from our essence via our true qualities offers much to our fellow human beings.

28. When we get caught in the habitual momentum of pushing and driving ourselves to perfection it is all too often at the expense of our general health and well-being.

29. Being a dentist is hard work, both physically and mentally and a truly supportive, nurturing and solid self-care routine very much needed.

    1. From what I have recently read in the media training in the medical profession is so demanding and punishing that some students commit suicide. It is so counterproductive and inhumane to place such pressure on students of any profession that leads to impaired physical or mental wellbeing. Especially ludicrous when you consider some students are going into caring professions yet their own care is completely disregarded throughout training.

30. “What was offered was a deeper truth to life; a truth to be explored and connected to, and that the source of this truth was held inside the physical body” Serge Benhayon presents the truth that we are all seeking is already held within our body.

31. ‘My work had been suffering the consequences too, for how can you truly care for another when you do not care for yourself?’ Such great point here Rachel – how we effect others when we disregard ourselves.

    1. We have to care and love ourselves first, ‘ I used to think love was about self-sacrifice and doing for others with no regard for myself. I learned, through steady commitment to myself, that love is a way of being, and that it starts with how I treat myself; and from treating myself lovingly, it naturally extends to others, no trying necessary!’

32. I love how you’ve claimed yourself and the quality you know live within Rachel. While reading this I feel I could relate very much in also my own life.

33. Wow – so many people strive for a ‘better’ job with more flexibility or A job that pays more but I almost never hear people talking about changing the way they treat themselves so that they actually enjoy their work. What a revelation!

34. This is an inspiring testament to the power of self-care and the seven steps are very practical and applicable in any profession.

35. I loved these words Rachel ‘I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others’. When we allow the choices of others to affect us, we lose the quality of ourselves.

    1. That’s true Sally, we can’t be at the mercy of others choices but we can make the self empowering choice to take care of the quality we live by.

36. Rachel it was wonderful to read this again. A great line “I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others.” I have noticed when we make another the focus, either because they have upset us or we are worried about them then the focus is now off our own quality of life and quality of energy we innately can bring. It’s a huge lesson to just let others be where they are, to know ourselves and not allow their abuse to affect us, and also allow others space to be with their choices with no expectations on where they “should” or “could” be.

37. How many of us have got caught up in this false belief of putting everyone else before ourselves is a loving way to be, so not true, ‘I used to think love was about self-sacrifice and doing for others with no regard for myself. I learned, through steady commitment to myself, that love is a way of being, and that it starts with how I treat myself; and from treating myself lovingly, it naturally extends to others, no trying necessary!’ Absolutely, it starts with bringing that love for self first.

38. What you describe in your first few paragraphs Rachel reminds me of how I used to live my life when I was training to practise Acupuncture almost 30 years ago, the drive and the perfectionism, ‘I made life about getting everything ‘right’’. Thank goodness I too attended some Universal Medicine courses and have let go of running my body in this loveless manner.

39. Rachel it is lovely to read how you are now taking care of your body and whole wellbeing. I have realised my body is delicate and precious and taking care of it is one of my new top priorities.

40. There is a wisdom in our body that is super supportive to connect with and honour in the way that we move, work and live our life. Thank you Rachel for sharing the simple ways that you have transformed your vitality and wellbeing.

41. Wow what a turn around, this is amazing Rachel. I am super inspired by the simple ways you have brought joy and vitality back to you.

42. This is a stunning post Rachel, with a super helpful guide to the steps you took to restore and heal yourself. How refreshing to read that most of those things involved the simplicity of movement and choices within each day, and not some expensive or comprehensive program someone had laid out for you. Very empowering and inspiring thank you.

    1. It is so simple isn’t it, to be aware of our body and take care of it by honouring it’s signals of discomfort and whatever other needs it has. As you say, no complicated program or “detox”, just super simple self honouring.

       1. Yes and not just super simple, but sustainable… what Rachel has described is a new way of life, and not just a measure to address a certain problem. That’s what makes it so empowering.

       2. I agree Jenny and everything Rachel has shared is also practical and relative to everyday life, no strange practices, just making small adjustments and loving changes by honouring the body.

43. “BEING A WOMAN FIRST – then a dentist” this is so powerful Rachel, to really state that first and foremost is not something we tend to do as women. To really know ourselves and that we are indeed a woman or man, before we are our job, or parent as another example. It is very empowering to re-learn that for ourselves and then live that.

    1. It’s a great point, we are taught that what we do comes first and then the role, like mother or dentist etc, but not to be the woman / ourselves first. There is such a focus on the doing in life and the functionality that comes with that (often with self sacrifice and disregard), instead of the focus on our being and how we feel t be ourselves and what that brings. We value what gets done and not so much the people doing it.

44. Women in the workplace can take note, be a woman first always. After that execute the role you are working in fully being the woman.

45. Life opens up in the most amazing ways when we begin to live a relationship with ourselves. And suddenly life is a whole new dimension, it becomes very simple and very enjoyable. There are no rules and we can feel a flow. Of course, this is not the way of living the world is familiar with, and therefore this reflection may not always be welcomed, but it is absolutely necessary as it is the truth that so many are looking to find.

46. Thank you Rachel for sharing your 7 steps. They are all great but I particularly like step 7 where you rest at lunch time with an eye pillow. I relate to having held myself to ransom with a picture of what a successful life looked like. I still have expectations that I am discovering all the time, but fortunately for me I am discarding the pictures and allowing my life to have more of a flow.

47. It is the little things in life, all that we know will do us real good, consistently applied step by step that will bring true change. It is simple but we tend to make things complex and then are not able to see the simplicity anymore.

48. I wonder if the fact of many people not liking going to the dentist also comes from the fact that dentist are often under such a pressure physically and emotionally and therefor expressing this through their work.

    1. Hi Lieke, I’ve experienced the pressure a dentist is under to perform a certain amount of teeth cleaning in a short time frame, which felt quite traumatising for my mouth. Although this dentist worked with care and consideration of my needs the time pressure really did impact on the consult. I’ve since changed to a dentist who takes more time and as a result the care of my teeth was more thorough and with remarkably less trauma. My current dentist shared that it’s a trend in dentistry to fit more consults in, so we could also add ‘financial pressure’ to your comment.

       1. That is such a great comments Melinda because it shows we can’t see dentistry as ‘factory’ producing clean teeth! There are people attached to the teeth and the way you are cleaning the teeth makes a difference to the experience in the chair.

49. The simple practise of observation without criticism, and moving and being gentle, slowly starts to dissolve old, hardened and protected ways of being and allows the gentleness and tenderness out – and is so much more of a freeing, open way of being in the world. No protection, no holding back and no hiding – just being who we naturally are.

50. So amazing Rachel, Thank you for offering the contrast of before and after. It’s insane that we are still choosing to educate under the same energy that has clearly not been working for eons. Thank god there are people like you out there showing/proving there is another way!

51. Rachel, reading this was a joy and a gift. I could feel the steadiness of you. And you write with such wisdom, delicacy, strength and authority. The changes that you have made are remarkable and I can feel how much you offer the world know and what a different offering that is from where you have come.

52. ‘What was offered was a deeper truth to life; a truth to be explored and connected to, and that the source of this truth was held inside the physical body..’ This sentence alone is so incredibly healing to read and sums up (if that’s even possible!) the limitless wisdom that Serge Benhayon presents. Coming back to my body is changing how I see and interact with life because I now know the depths of love and knowledge that is held within it – as equal to all others.

53. You’re 7 steps are stunning and clearly deeply powerful in the difference they have made to yourself and the way you practice. This could be adapted accordingly and applied to everyone as a beautiful way to live and work… and ultimately serve others through a much needed reflection of another way to move through life.

54. I love this sentence. “The most wonderful thing I have learned to say is “I don’t know” when I don’t have the answer, understanding that this is not a sign of failure or inadequacy.”
    The choice to accept I don’t know everything has been integral in healing the high level of anxiety that was my normal way of living for 40 of years.

55. An inspiring sharing Rachel ! What a difference you have made to yourself and your work situations and those your work with and no doubt your Patients receive a great healing from you!

56. What a beautiful and amazing transformation you have described here Rachel and it is not to be underestimated how much more you now enjoy working with your patients and your staff which must surely show and benefit everyone you have contact with in the day. I have been through a very similar transformation with my Physiotherapy profession and I have also been greatly supported in this by Universal Medicine.

57. At university we may learn a lot of facts and information that is needed but on what foundation if we come out feeling worn down, stressed, anxious, lacking in true self-worth? The practical steps that you share here Rachel on returning to the love we innately are and taking responsibility for our quality of living are a crucial foundation for our lives, we would do well if we brought this into universities and coupled the livingness of that love with the learning that we can do there.

58. I love your 7 steps to return to love, they are brilliant, very supportive and inspiring. ‘I used to think love was about self-sacrifice and doing for others with no regard for myself.’ I can so relate to this as I too used to think this was how I could express love, to always put others first. Now, I realised I had it back to front and no wonder I was feeling exhausted. Letting go of this has been great, I am now more able to be supportive to others and my expression of love is energising not at all exhausting but about not leaving anyone out including myself.

59. Wow Rachel! – this is a hugely inspiring before and after story that covers so many areas that affects each and every one of us in varying degrees. There is no way anyone who reads your story could do so without feeling truly inspired.

60. Just reading this Rachel, there has been some great reminders, some inspiration and loved the honesty in which you have shared. The 7 Steps to Return to Love is super clear and a great support in which to return to and read over again and again. There is so much in those steps, each being super powerful.

61. Love your seven steps Rachel, all practical and can be worked with every day and obviously will make a huge difference to quality of life.

62. Brilliantly expressed Doug, we miss the point in education and work systems, perhaps even in society in general, that the only “perfection” we ever can have is what we are already born with – the gorgeous essence of the person. This is what we truly need to value, foster, nurture and celebrate. Let this be our true foundation, and see society flourish.

63. What Universal Medicine teaches about self care is so simple, yet it’s so completely transformative. Great to read your story about how this translated in your work life – so many benefits for you, your staff and clients.

64. This is worth shouting from the rooftops: “My tenderness and innate delicacy are my greatest strengths, not weaknesses to be overcome and ignored.”
    There is so much to celebrate in the transformation you have described Rachel – for all women, and all of society. We have allowed ourselves to be ‘crushed’, as you say, by ridiculous notions of ‘perfection’ and expectation, for far, far too long – and it clearly aint’ workin’…

    1. I absolutely agree Victoria, striving to obtain ‘perfection’ simply leads to exhaustion because there is no such thing as perfection. So, chasing something that is unobtainable would only lead us astray and feeling fully exhausted and even lost. Also setting up expectations closes our hearts and our potential to deepen our evolution and relationships, be it with work, people or goals.

65. How strong is it in our culture, to put others first? Especially as women? To self-sacrifice to the point of personal toll and harm, and yet, still be held in some crazy notion of esteem and worth by ‘virtue’ of such actions and way of being?
    Thank-you for bringing your powerful revelations to the table here Rachel Mascord. Such Judeo-Christian dominant mythology (also existing elsewhere…) deserves to be broken down, and true self-devotion, love and care restored to the picture, and our way of being. And look then, at the qualities we may truly offer to others, as you yourself are doing – just amazing.

66. I love your 7 steps to returning to love. You inspire me to bring this same level of quality and love to all that I do. I am learning to let go of perfection and appreciate what I bring to my every day, and reminding myself that everything I need is already within me. This supports me to trust what I feel and not be easily influenced by what I think people expect of me, but to simply be myself in full, embracing my natural confidence as a woman.

67. This feels an amazing love letter Rachel and it inspires me to go deeper with myself, my relationship with my body and with being a woman and my relationship with my nursing job.

68. Love your seven steps on returning to love. Steps that could be used by anyone in any job, resulting in greater self-care and less stress and anxiety.

69. The dental profession sees high rates of depression and suicide, so the steps of self-care you offer, particularly seeing yourself as a woman first and dentist second are extremely important for any dentist to be able to continue to offer the highly valuable service for society, and at the same time enjoy your life.

70. Very revealing that in letting go of the drive to be the ‘perfect’ dentist has resulted in offering so much more with what is offered while working as a dentist.

71. When we live from the most sacred and innermost place we cannot help to live first as the gorgeous women we are rather than being driven by the tasks we have to do. I am still perfecting this!

    1. I am also learning to connect to my sacredness and innermost, without perfection but with more consistency and joy.

72. A beautiful example that there always is a way to bring about a change in how we experience life. That we are a woman/man before whatever the role we assign ourselves to at home/work is super important. We often complain about how stressful our job is and how much there to be done and there’s nothing we can do to change because we need money/security/comfort it brings and the job needs us s – and make that the ultimate reason for the way we feel, and we hardly ever give ourselves enough consideration to go ‘hey, I am worth looking after’.

73. I love what you have presented Rachel. So much wisdom in your sharing. Love is at the heart of who we are and when we return it to what we do, life is transformed.

74. There was a distinct understanding from your blog Rachel how the enormous, amazing changes you have chosen in your life and profession, came though a shift of awareness of a narrow relationship with life through work, expanding to a relationship with yourself. It did feel tangibly like letting go of one energy or consciousness or driving force that keeps us trying reach some unattainable goal and committing to another based on love and arriving back home to yourself. It was truly lovely to read and very relatable as having been one of your patients for years now and feeling how you treat your staff and patients, that you have chosen a way to live what you have discovered even amidst a super busy profession such as dentistry.

75. Thank you for sharing your 7 self-care steps that have supported you to return to love and that inner knowing of what is needed in any moment. The perfect antidote to the bane of perfectionism and so needed in our current society with the ever increasing pressure to do more thus leading to our rising disease and mental health problems that are placing an intolerable burden on our health services.

76. Wow Rachel this blog is full of such deep wisdom and practical advice on how to self-care it would be great to see this published in magazines and internet for others to be inspired by. Especially those in professions such as yours where putting others first is common instead of caring for self first and developing a quality within that supports you in your workplace and beyond and where others are touched and inspired by the loving choices you have made.

77. A beautiful sharing, Rachel. Being tender with ourselves in everything we do and then everyone feels this. I can feel your expansion as a woman and also the expansion in your practice. This is magic for everyone you connect to in your day.

78. A redefinition of what is true success is presented here, and this is what the world need now, because success is definitely not what has been presented to us.

79. Beautiful Rachel. There are so many bits that I can take from this blog but something that stands out in particular is the reminder that we are each enough just as we are. We can dance around this concept and play small at times but these are just games of hide and seek and distraction. However, the reality is that we are all grand in our own way and if we are prepared to let self love in, we will sparkle and shine regardless of anything else.

80. An inspirational account of overcoming the burden of perfectionism through discovering the power of connecting to our true quality within. Life’s success isn’t down to how much we know but how much of the truth of who we are we choose to live.

    1. What a wonderful definition of success Cathy – “Life’s success isn’t down to how much we know but how much of the truth of who we are we choose to live.” This ought to be taught in schools, as it is fundamental.

81. Definitely a piece of writing and sharing that brings the future into the present as the flow of experience and offerings about reclaiming the natural woman inside are just a pertinent as they were over 2 1/2 years ago when the blog was written. Indeed all the practical tips pretty much for me spell out everything that needs to be worked with to bring greatness to our lives – a greatness in the quality of every moment rather than the picture of greatness that Rachel has dissembled.

82. Rachel I just love how you share ‘I feel as though I have experienced a second puberty, at the age of 45; a second chance to embrace what it means to be a woman in this world. My tenderness and innate delicacy are my greatest strengths, not weaknesses to be overcome and ignored’. With the support of Esoteric Women’s Health this is indeed a realisation many many women have made and many more will follow as when we reignite the true women within us it inspires all others to do the same… It is never too late for any women to reconnect to themselves no matter their age and no matter their history.

83. ‘Now I do what I can, and no more’. I hear these words verbalised a lot by others and sometimes I feel they are said with a giving up mentality that is founded on an ‘I don’t really care’ attitude, but if I say these words, although they sound good, they kind of are also a cop out that gets me out of my responsibilities. When I feel it said in this way I must be honest and admit I react but as I read these same words in your blog Rachel I can feel your quality and commitment to all that you do and I know that you actually do all that you can and no more. This example also reminds me how all words can either be said from an emptiness or fullness that we are all sensitive enough to feel the intention of.

84. “I have learned to say “no” to the things that cause me stress.
    I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others.”
    I can relate to this Rachel and how the sense of enjoyment of everything in life returns when I apply these principles.

85. Rachel your transformation has shown others that there is a simplicity behind all that we do when we stop and put care in every action. I loved reading your 7 steps to return to love and can feel how supportive these are. I’m going to revisit mine and begin to nominate more in my work place. Thank you.

    1. Yes likewise Natasa. After reading Rachel’s words I can see that it’s time for me to revisit how I am living in my workplace as it seems that the busyness has been swallowing me up again lately.

86. Inspirational blog Rachel that shows how it is so possible to let go of perfectionism however deeply ingrained and choose to care for ourselves and how that then opens us up to truly care for others. What stands out for me in all you have written is the consistency in your commitment to loving yourself. Thank you for sharing and demonstrating how simple and possible it is for anyone to choose this path and how they can start by making simple changes and then build on those.

87. Consistently going to bed early, rituals that allow space to re-connect with the body, how we walk and sit and the way we set up the daily rhythm to not push the body beyond capacity, the tenderness of the fingertips, choosing the quality of the breath and equal conscious connection to the body and the task being performed – this is all so accessible, what can also be felt between your words is also the dedication you bring Rachel to how you are throughout the day.

88. Your expressive writing is so silky and beautiful Rachel and this is why ‘Everything I do is infused with the quality I am in when that task is being done.’

89. Thank you for the 7 steps to return to love. They are a great support and reminder what I can choose for myself.

90. Reading your blog made me check in with the gentleness of my being and I am feeling how tired I am right now because of the pressure I still put on myself to get things right.

91. I loved re-reading this blog Rachel and being reminded of your beautiful and supportive 7 steps to love. The quality in which you live you life at home or work is consistent and true always inspiring others with the loving choices you make.

92. A true woman in dentistry and what a woman! Thank you Rachel for this beautiful reflection and gentle reminder;
    “What was offered was a deeper truth to life; a truth to be explored and connected to, and that the source of this truth was held inside the physical body – the body I had ignored for so long”.

93. Inspiring and very lovely to read. Thank you Rachel.

94. Rachel, you have shared so many golden nuggets and wisdom here! “BEING A WOMAN FIRST – then a dentist” highlights so much of my own life within my profession. We forget we are Women first and not the profession first. You mentioned 7 steps, but reading your blog has so many more points equally as amazing that could be shared with everyone.

95. a statement or article like this should be required reading for every student going into their chosen career, whether it be dentistry medicine or whatever… If the connection with oneself was nurtured as an absolute priority as Rachel writes, the world would be a very different experience now.

96. What a gorgeous and inspiring blog to read Rachel and so true that self-care is key, in whatever field we work. And I can attest to and truly appreciate how that shines through in the wonderful, caring, nurturing space and service, that you provide. From my past dread of going to to the dentist I never would have thought it possible that I would enjoy going to the dentist as I now do.

97. When reading this blog two things stand out for me: the first is that “love is a way of being. ” rather than doing or behaving in a particular way according to society’s expectations. So much is done in the name of love that is only dictated by expectations.

    The second is that perfection is not the aim in life. When we are less than ourselves we need to thrive towards a goal in order to get recognition from our peers. Amassing skills, degrees, knowledge without reaching and exploring the well of love inside of us will never fulfill us. The Way of the Livingness has shown me another way to live my life.

98. I can relate to so much in this blog striving for achievement and being exhausted probably not so much in the work place but as a mother striving to have my children to have a “better life” than I did, better education, opportunities to fit in socially with singing, dancing, deportment. All sorts of lessons, telling them how to care for themselves, what to accept in life and what behaviors not to accept from people but modeling nothing in the way of the livingness of a true woman. What I was reflecting was a long way from what I was attempting to achieve. It wasn’t until I came to the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I began to learn about self-love I felt how loveless my life had truly been. I now understand by loving myself and connecting with my essence which is love the importance of opening my heart and expressing the love that is within me and by allowing love in, my reflection now offers love in everything I express.

99. ‘love is our essence and as such it cannot be given, it can only be expressed’ how true is that comment to me it feels like giving love has some sort of attachment to it, whether that be to the response of another or the relief for the person giving it whereas expressing love just is and comes as it is from the heart with no expectation or attachment.

100. A very powerful sharing thank you Rachel. Your living examples are deeply inspiring and practiced examples of applying the livingness of the Ancient Wisdom presented by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine

101. “At university I learned that I was never enough, and perfection in what was done was the only way to be enough.” It’s shocking to me how normal this is in our education system as it is today. I didn’t complete a degree but even before I got to University, I was feeling that whatever I did wasn’t going to be enough. The constant competition that is encouraged at school seems to me to just breed huge anxiety and tension within ourselves and between each other. We only have to look at the appalling suicide rates for young people who simply find they cannot cope with this pressure and choose a devastating route to escape from it, to see how damaging this pursuit of perfection is.

     1. ‘I am enough’. I need to stick this on post-it notes at work and at home to serve as a reminder when I forget.

102. I love your blog Rachel. It’s so inspiring to feel your transformation. You stand tall, blooming in your full beauty, offering us all your glorious reflection. Thank You.

103. Rachel this is a powerful piece that applies to every woman, no matter her job or role in life. You have covered so much and made it so practical thank you… the way forward is very clear if we wish to truly improve the relationship we have with ourselves, others and with life itself. True change is possible, and you have outlined exactly how it can be done.

104. Rachel I loved reading part 2, feeling how much you have claimed yourself as a woman by making simple daily choices that supported you to nurture and love yourself. I feel it is bringing presence to our day in this way that can make such a difference, even when things begin to feel heavy, the moment we stop, breathe and come back to ourselves, we can then approach the situation from a different perspective. This is something I am starting to do and already I feel so much lighter! Life feels joyless when we feel we have to be perfect, but the moment we let go of that ideal, we can actually begin to be ourselves and see the joy that we so naturally are.

105. Love it Rachel! And especially, I can relate to what you share when you say “At university I learned that I was never enough, and perfection in what was done was the only way to be enough.” – shocking how we leave the most crucial part of ourselves behind when have to jump through the hoops of University. But thank goodness that we have the understanding now to re-connect back to ourselves and to bring our full presence, care and nurturing to what we do.

106. Super gorgeous blog Rachel and I love your 7 steps 🙂 what stood out for me the most was the fact of the change at work with your female colleagues, it’s not very often in the workplace that a group of women can work and be together so harmoniously even though we know it is how it can be. I love your last line where you claim yourself in full so powerfully, it gave me goose bumps.

107. I enjoyed the blog, and your clearly mapped journey to a life that is clearly of your choosing and infinitely more appealing. As I read it, I was reflecting that for myself there seemed to be so much more work to do until I got to the last sentence and the reminder that we are already this… and the journey is not hard, its just a return to who we naturally are.

108. Thank you Rachel for your beautiful observations and learnings. You say that the body has its rhythms, and adjusting to them helps to heal, and to live according to your presence and whether you with you at the moment and not living franticly and with the drive to get much done. I have discovered this for me too and yes life becomes much more a flow and joy once I am connecting to myself and how I feel in this moment. This cuts the consciousness of achieving and racing after something- there is no more neediness, because there is so much love that holds.

109. All my life I was (and I am) afraid of going to the Dentist – but when I read your lovely words, follow your development and the claims of self-love you do everyday at work – I want to come and lay down on your chair, open my heart and my mouth and trust in you because I can feel your love as a lived quality and know therefore that you will treat me with that love. Thank you Rachel. When will you come to Europe to practice?

     1. Well said Sandra – I too have had a fear of dentist and it was through my relationship with Evolve Dental – Rachel Hall, that I was able to re-establish trust and an appreciation of what I had put myself through and to let go… Once I surrender to the process its a whole new experience of openness, understanding and love.

110. Well said Katie. Supporting each other as women is so natural…yet we have bought into the competition and comparison due to our lack of connection and appreciation of who we truly are. I love that I am coming to a deeper understanding of this within myself because as you say Katie ‘boy oh boy it feels amazing!’

111. ‘Being a woman first – and then a Dentist’ ~ This is a very simple statement and it makes so much sense. Yet this is not the way women live. We are everything else before we are a woman, if we even actually acknowledge the woman at all! Such a powerful and practical piece of writing Rachel that applies to us all.

112. Rachel I love your 7 practical steps and how they support us in our daily responsibilities. Its so true, our body does indeed groan and struggle under the excessive strain of pushing and driving it beyond what it can manage in a day while the debilitating consequence of perfection only further exacerbates this.

113. Rachel, isn’t it great to let go of perfectionism and allow ourselves to just be as we are. Saying ‘I don’t know’ is certainly not a ‘sign of failure or inadequacy’ but a sign of humility and openness. When we don’t need to be the expert we can meet other people as equals and there is opportunity for true connection. How gorgeous to have a dentist who is a woman first and not identified with her role and how lovely that you and your staff support each other so beautifully – a visit to the dentist could even become a pleasant occasion.

     1. When we say we don’t know it also opens us up, to other people and to the magic that is all around. The fact is the answer is never far away, and by being open we don’t have to struggle, on pushing through. Instead we can let the world come to us, and if we are feeling ourselves, then the decisions become so much simpler.

        1. Yes good point Simon, what you’re suggesting breaks down the constant push to find answers out there that I know women are very prone to. When the question we ask is genuine, the answer does come towards us in some form or another… much simpler and without half the angst of desperately trying to find it.

        2. I agree Simon. It’s so beautiful to let go of the need to know, or be seen to have all the answers. It’s so honest.

     2. ‘When we don’t need to be the expert we can meet other people as equals and there is opportunity for true connection’. Beautiful Sandra and yes to have Rachel for a dentist would be amazing.

114. Rachel a beautiful blog, I love how honestly you write, the seven steps you talk about are a great way to make more loving choices for ourselves.

115. Rachel what you have presented has given me inner strength. I have so much of it but I don’t tap into it enough. You have highlighted the 7 steps that has made me aware that I should look at my rhythms and see if they need refining – I’m sure they do 🙂

116. Super beautiful to read about the woman you are now Rachel. The ourcycles app has been a great support for me too, its incredible how doing something so seemingly small, like using it consistently, can have a great impact on how you are and for me personally, my health. I liked this point you made about ‘Choosing to go to bed earlier, consistently.” the consistently part is important.

     1. Yes great point Emily… the consistency part has always been the key for me too. Once I have consistency with something, it becomes part of my foundation, and I am very unlikely to forget it, let it slide or shirk it as part of my ‘self-care’.

        1. Yes, I agree – being consistent is the one thing that does support me. Believe it or not, no matter how busy I am, once I am being consistent it somehow opens up my day with more spaciousness and everything flows easily.

        2. I know what you mean Donna, sometimes it’s just a simple choice to stay with my body, and that space opens up…

117. Rachel I have found more in your words the second time around. What a huge difference you have made to your work situation through your willingness to truly look at what you need to implement in your own life to bring this about. Self nurturing has always been a difficult thing for me to truly commit to until recent times and at last I get that none of us can give love without first giving to ourselves, after all we are so worth it! What a treat for your staff and client to have that love offered to them through you too.

118. Learning to say ‘I don’t know’ was a big deal for me as well – wanting to be someone with an answer, something useful to offer was very strong in me. And what I used to think good teamwork was the one where everyone pushed themselves beyond their capacity to deliver something to impress the client/the boss/the competitor etc., there was no harmony or care. What Serge Benhayon presented really challenged the yardstick I gauged life and relationships (with myself as well as the others) with, and I am so glad I have been able to swap it for the one of love.

119. What a gorgeous article, so rich and full of wisdom. What you have shared is so common with the striving for perfectionism. It is such a crippling way to live and I love how you have taken the reader on a journey of your steps back to love which offers a profound healing to all those who wish to make a true change also.

120. Self-love is the path by which the true self (true love) is first glimpsed and next known. It is but the first step in a grander walk that sees us move within the rhythm of all things.

     1. Exquisite Liane.

     2. So beautiful Liane…

     3. Stunning Liane!

121. I can relate to the constant striving to achieve and the desperate exhaustion that follows. You can never try to be something you already are and therein lies the key to the depletion felt when we go in search of something else.

     1. So true, I had never realised this was the reason for feeling so depleted in all those years of searching for answers. ‘You can never try to be something you already are…’ – profoundly wise, and the answer to the entire spiritual new age!

122. “…for how can you truly care for another when you do not care for yourself?”

     Rachel, these words have the ability to transform the medical profession and indeed the world, for how often do we deeply care for others; friends, family, colleagues, clients, customers etc. but neglect to give ourselves the same love? If we do not give ourselves the same love, then surely this changes the quality of the love we give to others. However, love is our essence and as such it cannot be given, it can only be expressed. And one of its finest qualities is that it is there in equal measure in us all needing only our permission to be expressed in full. Therefore is our expression or lack of it, which trips us up and thus impedes its/our natural flow.

     1. Great point Liane, ‘love is our essence and as such it cannot be given, it can only be expressed’. So how important it is therefore for us to open our hearts and express the love that is already there and to let love in so we do not ‘impede’ the ‘natural flow’.

     2. Love is our essence and it cannot be given, but it can only be expressed. It starts once we give it permission for all to be expressed, that is so profound and absolute truth and at same time is the key out of our self created prison.

123. ‘everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME’ Many of us have known this on an intellectual level – for isn’t this what a lot of the religions and philosophies say? Yet by adhering to your steps it is possible to begin to feel this for real and begin to live this on a daily basis, certainly not for me all the time but enough of the time to know all of the time would be stupendous. At last not living from the head or the heart or the genitals but from all of us – all of us that is alive with the fire of God.

124. Thank you Rachel! You are deeply inspiring in what you have connected back to, and the grace, presence and tenderness that you now live. It is a blessing to feel there is a different way. And currently IN University, this is what I am learning to bring and not let the ideals and beliefs within Uni run, “At university I learned that I was never enough, and perfection in what was done was the only way to be enough.” I keep feeling this need for perfection, and only when I cut it and stop playing ball with it – does it drop away, and there is the natural space for me to be me, and do whatever is needed.

125. These two line really stood out to me.
     “At university I learned that I was never enough, and perfection in what was done was the only way to be enough.
     Through Universal Medicine I learned that everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME.”

     It is so spot on that at university everything is telling you to be perfect otherwise you haven’t done your absolute best. The perfection drives goes so deep that your worth as a student, is reflected through yours marks. Marks are deducted when your heading isn’t centred on the page, you don’t write what they want to hear or in the accepted structure.

     Now we know that a student’s worth is not dictated by their GPA however many are under this spell, sadly. A student’s worth comes from themselves first then their ability to commit to their chosen field of study.

     1. Hear hear, wise words from a young man like you, Luke. Wouldn’t the world be a much better place to live, when the need for perfection wasn’t there anymore but first of all the person in connection with their heart and soul and their passion and love for a subject, I would have loved to study in university.

        1. I agree Monika, and in time it will change. As has everything else

126. Thank you for sharing your insights Rachel. This line really stood out for me on reading your blog: “I made life about getting everything ‘right’’. I have come to see and know that trying to get everything right is a huge imprisonment. It keeps us as far away from ourselves as we possibly could be. Being honest and truthful on the other hand opens us up and allows us to feel our equality with another. I too had to learn to say that I did not know something when I didn’t know it and to know that the world did not come to an end if I didn’t know. Learning to listen to my body has been one of the many profound shifts that have occurred for me through attending presentations by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

     1. How true Elizabeth that getting everything right is a huge imprisonment which keeps us in constant anxiety which is so draining. Trusting that it is not a sign of weakness to open up and admit when we do not know but actually a strength thus opens up the possibility for true teamwork. This has transformed the way I am at work and made it so much more enjoyable and I can feel that I am being much more effective.

127. You have shared some awesome points here, Rachel, but the one that resonated with me the most was, “…I have learned to say “I don’t know” when I don’t have the answer, understanding that this is not a sign of failure or inadequacy”.

     1. This resonates with me, too, Carmin, to say I don’t know – when I feel to and not to hold it back any longer. This allows others to return to their true answer inside too. What it also does; it shows there is no need for perfection and there is a right not to know everything. It brings me back to equalness when someone is honestly saying that they don’t know. All the pressure of perfection is nailed and can go with these words.

     2. Hmmm yes, one I know I am still learning, very powerful Carmin!

     3. Yes exactly Carmin – to be truly free to say ‘I don’t know’ without feeling any less for it.

128. Rachel I agree with your observation about University, my experience was the more I studied to gain degrees, the less confident I became about my ability to be good at any job, this just kept compounding. I now understand that the stress, study and such purely mental and pressure driven pursuits are a surefire way to take you out of your body, leaving you unsure about how to handle anything, and never feeling up to the task. Thanks to Universal Medicine, that notion was turned on its head – learning about looking after the body and ourselves seems simple enough, but has brought a profoundly powerful shift in awareness and well-being, not to mention a steadily growing confidence in work and life, no matter what may come.

     1. Great Annie, and it is the Universal Medicine Therapies that support coming back into the body to begin the process of re-establishing a relationship with ourselves. This is the No1 relationship that turns everything around.

129. I suspect that from your opening few paragraphs, this is why so many people, intelligent sensible people end up becoming depressed. This drive for getting things right or perfect and living within this unachievable place will undoubtedly play itself out in some form of personality trait or expression. To live feeling like you are not a worthy person is detrimental to our self worth and to compensate for this we can numb this feeling with food and or alcohol and still not deal with the self worth issue…

130. What a tender, honest beautifully inspiring blog, thank you Rachel. I am sure most of us have been driven outside of ourselves by the curse of ‘perfection’ and the ‘ need to have all the answers’ , especially for health care professionals. In my work in physiotherapy I can relate to so much of how you used to work. I had no idea what is was to truly care and love myself until I was inspired by those I met who live that way, such as Serge Benhayon, Natalie Benhayon and the practitioners of Universal Medicine. This was such a freedom from the old hard driven ways and you have said it all for me and so many with :

     Through Universal Medicine I learned that everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME. This inspired me to make self-care and self-love my way, to liberate the lovely, tender, and innately wise woman that was ALREADY THERE.

131. In a word – Awesome! Rachel, thank you. You inspire me to give away the ‘don’t quite measure up’ chatter, and its many versions, that so often consume my head. When I do my body is there consistently waiting to feed me with true markers for me to take note of make choices accordingly, to take into all I do. I too thank Universal Medicine for pioneering this way.

132. A very powerful sharing, thank you Rachel. I can relate to everything what you are writing. One big challenge is still for me “Learning to sit with respect for my body. ” That I find difficult sometimes to find a position, where my body really feels comfortable. I will keep exploring it…

133. This is beautiful and deeply inspiring to read Rachel, your dedication to truly love yourself and heal your patterns of self worth are a joy to read. What Universal Medicine offers everyone equally around self-care and self-love is super power-full and truly works.

     1. Yes, Rachel is a deeply inspiring, living example of what is possible through applying the Ancient Wisdom teachings as taught by Universal Medicine. What is also beautiful is to read other women so openly joyful to see another woman expressing in this way. Comparison and jealousy would normally abound, and what you share Anna in response, is simple, heartfelt and genuine.

134. To say “I don’t know” when I don’t have the answer…this made me giggle. How often have I felt that I had to know everything and that I ‘had to’ come up with some intelligent answers all the time….quite tiring….but no longer. Very simple, saying I don’t know when I don’t, and then still feel more than good enough.

     1. Yes this stood out for me too Mariette. I used to feel less if I didn’t know something and would try to cover it up in some way. I love saying it now because the absolute honesty and openness it comes with supports the relationship to be more honest and to honour what I know and where I’m at, truly strengthens my foundations.

        1. Beautiful Lucy and I feel the same. I love the honesty that comes with it. And the humbleness. Just saying I don’t know. Just like yesterday, when a dear friend shared about his trip and where he was going. I just shared that I had no idea where that was and it felt lovely. I don’t have to know where all the countries are in the world, I just share and then he tells and then I know.

135. Notwithstanding the profound philosophical wisdom that Serge Benhayon presents to humanity, it is sometimes the simplest of statements in his presentations that can open the door ways to the deepest healings, that make it possible to let go of deep hurts and deeply embedded paradigms of disregard.

136. Wonderful blog Rachel. Simple, practical and delicious steps to take to bring more love into one’s life as evidenced by your way of living.

137. This is fabulous, Rachel. A timeless guide of how to live and work with joy.

138. wow Rachel your article is jam packed full of gems and practical tips – a mini manual for life. I too have found setting up little rituals and loving reconnection moments is very supportive. Your observation: “the source of this truth was held inside the physical body – the body I had ignored for so long” was also a major eye opener and life changer for me. You wrote: “I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others” that pretty much nails it and is truly responsible.

     1. Yes spot on Nicola, this is a ‘mini-manual for life’… it applies to every one of us, if not in it’s entirety, then at the very least in many parts.

139. The grace and steadiness felt in this blog is palpable and testament to the truth of how you are living. You are indeed an inspiration Rachel. Thank you.

140. Thank you Rachael your blog was inspiring. I loved the 7 steps to love, simply beautiful. I had been a yes person most of my life, always wanting to please, to keep safe of course. When I started to take more responsibility for my life and my choices I found it much easier to say no. Being honest with myself and with others felt so real and so freeing. The “noes” have it now, but also the yeses of course.

141. Your gentle and loving way could be felt in the sharing of the unfolding of you within your work Rachel. A blessing for all the people that come to you – a healing in the chair. Dentistry has always carried fear for many people attending for treatment. What you are introducing into your clinic will change the ‘Fearful’ reputation of dentistry forever. Thank you for sharing.

142. The quality that you bring to your life and your work Rachel, your commitment to the innate delicacy, tenderness and power of the beautiful woman you are, is deeply felt throughout your blog and an inspiration. It reminds of a beautiful and deeply perfumed rose emanating its divine essence to all that pass by.

143. What a huge blog Rachel! I’m so glad I read it. The only way to be in this world is to be who we really are and it sounds like it’s the woman you really are coming out and adressing the things that aren’t you. So inspiring and what is more inspiring is to see people walking in their truth. The richness and vitality that you describe and now live is what it’s all about.

144. Working in the way you now work Rachel, makes it easy to see how one could work up until their last breath. You have and are creating a body that supports you in all that you do, so retirement from dentistry is probably never going to happen! Imagine the wisdom and experience patients and colleagues alike will gain from you deciding to love yourself first.

145. I want to go to the dentist now! I love the feeling of getting my teeth done and with what you have shared Rachel it would make the experience a whole different level haha. Thank you for sharing your 7 steps to return to love. A lot of them I pondered on.. How I can create little stop and connect moments and notice how I walk to the door and great others more. These may seem like little things, but I can see them having a big impact.

146. I work with nursing students and observe how stressed and disregarding of their own wellbeing being they can be. When I read the sentence, “what I did not grasp was that my developed patterns of self-neglect and anxious drive had become an entrenched and normal way of operating”, I wished they could all read it. I see many students thinking it will all be worth it in the long run. But 3 or more years of pushing yourself takes its toll and leaves them already under restrain in a demanding profession. Self-care needs to begin right at the start of the degree so it is a normal way to be by the time they enter the workforce.

     1. What a great opportunity you have Fiona to reflect the possibility of a different way to them. The years so many of us have lost in pushing ourselves for some goal in the future when if we just chose to listen to our body in the present we learn that ‘everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME.’

147. I love your 7 steps, particularly number 3, washing your hands in-between patients, taking this as an opportunity to re-collect yourself and start anew from you.

148. An absolute success story if I have ever read one.
     The way you are with your women staff members is a true testament to this. To have such beautiful harmonious, lovely working relationships with your colleagues just goes to show how loving, honouring and gracious you all are together and this is not the ‘norm’ within most organisations. A true honour to read your blog, Rachel.

149. Rachel thank you for your sharing here. Your dedication and commitment to yourself, to truth and to love, which I feel are all one and the same, is a constant inspiration to me and I’m sure many others.

150. Thank you Rachel, what an amazing awareness your blog shares. The students of the Livingness bring such integrity and tenderness to all they do.

151. I loved reading this blog Rachel and feeling the quality of you as you lay back in your dentist chair with the warm eye pillows, lovingly nurturing yourself. Sheer heaven to read and also for the patients who get to see you after your ‘rest’.

152. Rachel I thank you for your inspirational Blog. What you have expressed can enrich our lives and appreciate that the qualities that we share with others, such as self appreciation, tenderness Love and self nurture . To work as you do now, without the stress ,must have made a huge difference to the satisfaction and joy in your day.

153. Great article on your steps back to love. What I liked, and it was a reminder for me, was to allow yourself to say ‘I don’t know’. I often give answers, or at least will start to help somebody out. But just the idea to say I don’t know made me relax already. I am taking that into my conversations.

154. Pingback: Dentistry Part 1 – When a Woman chooses her Profession over and above Herself | Women in Livingness

155. Wonderful blog Rachel. From your amazing presentations that I have seen, you not only bring your fullness to dentistry but to all who have been inspired by your deep wisdom that is so fully claimed. Very inspiring.

156. “My tenderness and innate delicacy are my greatest strengths, not weaknesses to be overcome and ignored”. This is such a powerful and life-changing realisation. What a different world we would have if these qualities were deeply appreciated for what they truly are.

     1. Thank you Rachel and Jonathan, I agree, the collective tenderness of the students of the Livingness is one of our greatest strengths.

157. Awesome sharing Rachel. I can very much relate to it and the learning to say “I don’t know”. Thats such a liberating process to not strive for perfection anymore and just go with the flow and just be!!! Very awesome testimony of how life changing responsibility is.

158. It’s wonderful to read of this new connection to life you have. There is a strong belief in me that to get anything done it needs to be done fast otherwise I won’t fit it all in, yet your work life has slowed down considerably with how you are with yourself but I’m sure you still fit in all that needs to be done. It’s great for me to read this and be challenged in it. I love this quote “The stillness I bring creates space and eliminates the frantic urgency that used to permeate my work.” There is such a big difference between how the outer world has taught us to work and how the natural woman within approaches work (in her stillness).

159. “Through Universal Medicine I learned that everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME. This inspired me to make self-care and self-love my way, to liberate the lovely, tender, and innately wise woman that was ALREADY THERE.”
     -Beautifully claimed and a great reminder.

160. An incredible testiment to what is possible when you chose to take responsibility for how you conduct yourself day to day. AWESOME.

161. Rereading your blog was beautiful. Becoming the true woman we are, no matter what age, feels awesome and like a blossom that is finally able to grow.

162. The beauty in this story is that you are everything already, and from choosing to self love and self care you were able to realise all of this – and deepen into the gorgeous woman you are today and be a truly amazing practitioner in your field with genuine health and vitality.

163. I really relate to the line ” I used to think love was about self-sacrifice and doing for others with no regard for myself”. That was the way I was brought up, too, to believe that doing things for myself was selfish, and it was important, especially for a woman to put husband and family first at all times. It was then of course, so easy to completely forget about looking after oneself. It is wonderful how I have found from looking after myself first, then I am able to have such a wonderful relationship with others. I have learned to bring the love that I have for myself to those others, a much lovelier person to have a relationship with.

164. Thank you Rachel. I really like the way you have described the hopes and aspirations that came from university life, but the reality was that you were anxious and over stretched. This shows so beautifully how the quality of our life far out weighs the content of it, which again you have given to us by way of your seven steps.

165. Rachel this was just gorgeous to read. How you live and work is deeply inspiring and the tenderness and delicacy that extends from how you are with yourself is truly embracing.

166. Thank you Rachel for revealing how harmful aspiring to perfection is and how healing self love and tenderness for ourselves can be.

167. Rachel , I found it very helpful that you shared the list of some very practical steps you have taken to return to love. I am feeling inspired to write my own list now. Thank you.

168. I love what you have written about love ‘I used to think love was about self-sacrifice and doing for others with no regard for myself. I learned, through steady commitment to myself, that love is a way of being, and that it starts with how I treat myself; and from treating myself lovingly, it naturally extends to others, no trying necessary.’ This is a powerful and clear blog showing us that it is HOW we live that makes the difference and can bring a certain quality to our everyday, not what we do.

169. Thank you Rachel, you have offered some top tips to take into the workplace. I love this paragraph – “Consequently, I have started to now enjoy my work. I love the opportunity it brings for deep connection to people. I no longer feel crushed under the load of perfection I cannot ever achieve.”

170. Rachel, I love the many ways you have mentioned through the day to be in your full presence, particularly when you rest in the dentist chair with a warm pillow over your eyes. As a patient I have spent many hours in such a chair trying to be perfect so the session could finish as soon as possible. Soon I will be back in that chair but I will not seek perfection. I will be in my presence, with my body, honour it, feel everything there is to feel and enjoy the care given to me by the doctor.

     1. A lovely way to approach being the patient in our own presence, feeling all that needs to be felt, in effect working with my dentist in the healing process. Thank you for sharing Patricia.

171. Beautiful to revisit this blog Rachel, and feel the graceful way you have brought yourself to your work, and indeed how you live every day. It is so real and accessible, that I am touched to bring more tenderness to my body even in typing these words!
     The take home line for me is this: “there is a harmonious timing in which to do things”. It can be so easy to lose this natural harmony and flow, to accede to outer demands and pressures… We are surely capable of ‘doing much’, but your article here truly bring home that the true success lays in how we do what we do – are we negating or compromising ourselves, or are we truly supported, and if need be, ready to fire away…

     1. So beautifully said Victoria, I also really love that message: “there is a harmonious timing in which to do things”. I can sometimes get caught up thinking I don’t have time because i’m ‘too busy’ so time is taken away from me. I can feel like there is no room to slow down, check in with myself etc etc BUT what I can sense in your article is that you allow yourself so much space to feel what your body needs to be honouring yourself and honouring the woman. It feels so worth creating that space and connecting more to the woman, as this would mean a life lived with more quality and presence.

        1. I agree wholeheartedly Ariel. In any form of ‘rush’ or ‘push’ to do… the essence of ourselves as women, and men also, is lost. And this essence is something to treasure way beyond the values and beliefs that still dominate this world that would determine our worth based upon what we ‘do’, i.e. our output…

172. This is such a wonderful blog Rachel, I am appreciating all that you have brought awareness too – every tiny detail we hold in our bodies that holds us back from the natural tenderness and truth we are needs exposing and letting go. Steadfastly I can feel your dedication in every word.

173. Blown away by this blog. I can actually feel myself slowing down and breathing a bit deeper and relaxing into my body bit further as I read. Let go of all of the pressure is what I read here, and I think you might have just given me permission to as well – I just suddenly felt like I could really do my new job at my own pace and that that is ok – its great – there is so much pressure around me to be a certain way and I don’t have to take it on. Very touching and inspiring Rachel.

174. I very much enjoyed reading your blog Rachel, it is a definite blue print on how life can be so much more than the struggle most of us find we are in at times.

175. Rachel, what a gorgeous practical tender blog. What you share is so simple and so profound, how we can live in ways that support us to be us no matter what we do. Simple things have an impact and all we need in any given moment to be us in all we do.

176. “I learned, through steady commitment to myself, that love is a way of being, and that it starts with how I treat myself; and from treating myself lovingly, it naturally extends to others, no trying necessary!” I love this Rachael. I have found the very same thing.
     And . . . “Through Universal Medicine I learned that everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME. This inspired me to make self-care and self-love my way, to liberate the lovely, tender, and innately wise woman that was ALREADY THERE.” Yes this is so simple and so true for each and every one of us! If only everyone knew this in themselves! Thank you Rachel.

177. I love this beautifully supportive and honest blog , thank you Rachel. I can so relate to so much of your old drive of perfection – from the ‘ never enough’ stamp from university days – I had the same within my learning in physiotherapy. I especially loved the part of .. ‘ True woman in Dentistry’ I am learning about my delicate, tender qualities and living that more and the huge difference that makes to my clients at work as well as in all my relationships. I am loving being a woman again and learning as you have :
     ‘ My tenderness and innate delicacy are my greatest strengths, not weaknesses to be overcome and ignored. I have come to feel the quality of being that we, as women, bring to the world.’

     1. Kate273, I also love that quote you have ended your comment with. It is so beautiful to begin to feel that “quality of being that we, as women, bring to the world.” It is really great for me to be working on that too.

178. I love how you learnt to nail perfectionism through self-honour and self-love by coming back to the body – it truly is that simple!

179. “…for how can you truly care for another when you do not care for yourself?” And herein lies the falsity we fall for; giving what we have not yet ‘got’ to give. No wonder we are so exhausted! When we live from the fullness that we already are, we never again have to feel the lack we learn to be.

     1. Spot on Liane, “giving what we have not yet ‘got’ to give.” leads to exhaustion. We often try to fix in another what needs attention in our self.

180. A very timely blog for me to read, as I am starting to see through the trap of perfectionism. Thank you Rachel, through your article I have received further clarity on how perfectionism hold us back.

181. This is very beautiful Rachel. Absolutely the way to go!

182. When we study at the university level, not only we get knowledge, abilities and know how. We also align to a consciousness that tells us very clearly how to measure professional success and failure. Such consciousness governs us in terms of expectations and in everything related to ‘make progress.’ The problem, as you say Rachel and as I have discovered myself, is that it helps to build a unloving life (if the word love is taken in its truest and fullest meaning). Renouncing that alignment is not easy but is truly freeing. Self care, not doubt, is crucial in that journey.

     1. Emfeldman I have observed this alignment in myself and students I work with – the ability to drive oneself is seen as a badge of honour almost, and needs to be renounced. It would be great if we could present life skills along with study in all courses offered.

183. I can so relate Rachel, I am working on the “no urge to get on and ‘do’.” I understand the profoundness of it but to really let go of my drive for perfection and allow myself to just BE somehow takes a very loving discipline and consistency to stop, re-connect and surrender.

     1. “Everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME”, so true Rachel – thank you for sharing and confirming that we do not need to look outside of ourselves for any answers.

184. I love your 7 steps to return to love. I have a few of these in my day that really support me. One in particular is the washing of my hands and applying moisturiser. It has become a moment to see where I’m at, either to nurture and enjoy a little me time ( just 1-2 minutes) or to notice if I’m rushing or being careless. Then I can choose to not continue in the rushing mode. It’s very ‘handy’ as it’s a constant reminder throughout my day.

     1. I love these steps too Laura, it is like a recipe for us to return to ourselves and really leave the nervous drive behind. One of my stop moments in the day is when I open and close doors gently, it really helps me feel my body more and stay gentle with my movements and it keeps me present with me rather than thinking ahead of myself.

        1. I have a few stop moments where I use my hands to connect to myself and be gentle, another one is if I get stuck in traffic or stopped at traffic lights, I’ll turn my hands over in my lap as gently as I can or consciously loosen my grip on the wheel and drop my shoulders. I have noticed over the past couple of years how much more delicately my hands move these days thanks to these little moments, it’s quite gorgeous.

     2. Always enjoy a bit of humour Laura – thanks for the ‘handy’ tip!

     3. Just as you do Laura I love Rachel’s 7 steps to return to love. I also love your handy reminder that taking just 1-2 minutes a couple of times a day from the 1440 minutes we actually do have in a day gifts us with the opportunity to fully revitalise and reconnect us back to what is important – ourselves.

        1. Every moment counts.

185. Rachel, I love what you write here, because I can relate to it very much! Accepting, that non perfect is absolutely perfect 😉 is a huge step for women like us, who learned very early that they get accepted about their doing and talents. I have exactly the same feeling of discovering the woman in me with 34 , because I chose differently how I am during the day – it is a miracle and shows you can change anytime.

186. It’s so beautiful to read how you and your dental nurses now work together. So often in work places there is competition and jealousy… but what you have presented is that women can work together in a way that is truly supportive and healing for all.

187. Wow Rachel, so beautiful, inspiring and empowering. I love everything you have shared, Thank you.

188. Beautiful Rachel, I can feel your tenderness emanating from your words expressed here. How blessed your patients must be to have someone who cares for themselves and therefore this is the quality they receive as well when they have an appointment with you.

189. This blog is a real keeper – I’ll be back many times to re-read and explore. I loved what you wrote about the Our Cycles App, it’s supported me to make the connection to bring more nurturing in to what I’m observing in myself.

190. ‘I have opened my heart to the women I work with’ how gorgeous and rare a gift is that. Beautiful sharing Rachel.

191. Thats beautiful Rachel. I aspire to work in healthcare like you. working to the best I can without trying to be perfect and without carrying all of peoples problems around with me. This level of self acceptance is amazing and helps others to see that we are beautiful on the inside and that we just need to let it shine.

192. “Today I bring that woman, in full, to the practice of dentistry”….pretty cool statement Rachel and pretty cool that you are doing it. Your story is gorgeous one to read about how you got to this point. It is inspiring and I got a bit excited thinking about all the other students of Universal Medicine who are also re-connecting to their fullness and then bringing that to their industry. I can feel a revolution coming on….and that is also pretty cool.

     1. Funny thing Sarah, so much more depth has been developed since the writing of this blog. It will never cease as we all learn the power of our tenderness and our commitment to truth.

193. What a powerful blog. Rachel I loved how you debunk the notion that to make big improvements in our life you have to make radical changes, or push yourself. Lots of the changes you speak of are the small things, and how you do things, like how you walk to and from your waiting room. This is so accessible, because we can all choose to do whatever we are doing with more focus, or more gently. It takes no more time.

194. Thanks Rachel for an amazing blog. I love how you say ‘Everything that is needed is already inside of me” For this is the answer that dissolves so much of the futile struggle, and instead embraces the simplicity of caring for the body in a way that it can feel and know the love that it innately is.

195. It really shows how making steps for self-care and self nurturing do make a difference in so many parts of your life.

     1. Yes Lukeyokota, in every part of life! Nothing is left untouched by the choice to be more self-loving as this changes the quality of energy we hold for ourselves, which affects everything in our lives. It also makes a difference for (all) others. I have always marvelled at the idea that when a butterfly flaps it’s wings on the other side of the world, it can be felt. While my mind finds this hard to fathom, when I read a blog like this, I am reminded that because Rachel has made the choices she has, the quality she now offers to the world, is different. And because we are all connected, what we are each offered has now changed, making the same choices she has made, accessible and more possible than before she made them… so beautiful!

        1. Honestly we should rely more on what has been felt then what we see.

        2. Yes absolutely… and re-learning to do that is an enormous part of healing

196. You are a true inspiration Rachel… The way that you are living is one of devotion to being and bringing love into all that you do. This is the most amazing blog that really shows that.

197. I can relate to what you write about, that you just ‘existed’ 17 years of your life. I did the same. Actually I reached a point of ‘giving up’ on life at an early stage, but then life just went on and I became just functional, ‘in existence’. Incredible now, but true. You can live, without having a real life, a true living. Years later I came out of the darkness, from deep in the ground where I hid myself. Many people and situations have contributed to my coming back to life again. The workshops of Serge Benhayon opened my eyes and my heart widely again. I felt this was the missing part, which I had not until then seen reflected back to me throughout our society. Gradually I have become more alive, including the wonderful steps described in the blog. My most intimate relationship now is with my body and my breath. Two things I loathed in the past as they reinforced my being here; now I love them as my beacon, my confirmation I am joyfully alive.

198. Rachel as a fellow “never get it right” person I really reasonated with your article even though I am not a dentist.
     I too have been able to slowly let this goal of being perfect go with the support of teachings of Universal Medicine and what I have embraced from the Esoteric Women’s groups.

     1. Sharon you could plug any work into the space given to the word “dentist” and it would apply. Perfectionism is everywhere. It is as though we believe it delivers the quality. But we have all found there is another source of quality that leaves the tension and fretfulness of “perfection” in the dust.

        1. So true Rachel, we caste our perfectionistic expectations on almost every aspect of life, it is definitely not the domain of any one profession that’s for sure – ultimately proving to ourselves time and again that we are indeed ‘not enough’. Letting this go, and returning to the fact we are already everything, intact… is a blessing the size of Niagara Falls! Thanks for showing how it can be done… in 7 simple steps!!

199. Thank you Rachel for this gorgeous sharing of allowing yourself to come out from under all the pressure you were putting on yourself. I too can relate to this, especially the perfection part. I spent most of my life in search of perfection so I would not be criticised because for me being criticised meant I was not being accepted, and I very much wanted to be accepted. What I was not aware of through this relentless quest for acceptance by achieving perfection was that what I truly wanted was to deeply accept myself and it really wasn’t about being accepted by others.

     With the support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I have come to a deeper acceptance of Me and all that I am, and now it doesn’t matter whether people accept me or not because I already have this from myself. And with this deeper acceptance of myself I am able to more deeply accept others and allow them into my life in a much more intimate way. This has been extraordinarily healing for me as I have always known this is what I wanted I just wasn’t sure how to go about it. This is where Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine were invaluable in supporting me to let go of all the ways I was holding onto that which got in the way of allowing a deeper acceptance to be a natural part of my life and the true beauty is, it is so natural to live a life of deeply accepting who we are.

200. You are a woman first and then the dentist. So beautiful. Thank you Rachel, for this blog and what you bring to all those gorgeous people lying in your chair.

201. So beautiful Rachel. Having known you along your journey with this and seeing you blossom has been truly beautiful. It is a testament to what can happen when we choose to fully self nurture and take awesome care of ourselves. You are a role model to many, that is for sure.

202. Rachel I love what you have shared your transformation here.
     What struck me the most was all that self care, self love and the lovely, tender, graceful, and innately wise woman was always there inside you. Thank you for sharing the practical ways you allowed your true self to reborn to the world.

203. This is full of gems of practical wisdom, thank you Rachel. I love how you said – “I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others”.

204. And keep bringing the woman you are Rachel – you are truly gorgeous. Your words
     “I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others” is a key for every woman and her choice to be all that she is already.

205. Rachel, there are no words to describe the level of insight and healing that your story offers. I felt such a spherical level of healing as I read your story, I could feel it coming to me from all directions. For me to use more words will only minimize what you have shared, other than to say it was ‘pure expansion.’

206. Hi Rachel, this blog is such a welcome way to work as a dentist. The messages I get at dental school are very much the same as the ones you got – it is about perfection, getting the job done in whatever way. I can feel the way you describe is supporting me to not get distracted by all the outer pressures to join in that disregarding way of doing dentistry and to instead choose to stay with my body and my grace and beauty as a woman. Thank you.

     1. Liekevanhaastrecht you are going to be an awesome dentist as you are already awesome.

207. Rachel I could feel my body responding to the simple 7 steps to return to love for they are things I can do for myself at work and sometimes do, but I find your whole blog a timely reminder to always put myself before work and the demands of others. You are indeed an amazing woman and dentist

208. Great sharing Rachel. The steps are practical, so simple and feel amazing.

209. That’s beautiful Rachel how you have changed so much. I know what it’s like to be “crushed under the load of perfection I cannot ever achieve”, and it’s so freeing to let that go and to not harden myself in protection but allow that ‘innate delicacy’ to express. Not only does it feel better to me it affects everyone around me and allows them to be more at ease and not feel driven to perform to any expectations.

210. Love these 7 steps to returning to love and love what you have written on true success. You are a great example of how it really can be that simple when we listen to our bodies. Thank you for sharing Rachel.

211. Thank you Rachel . So practical and applicable to everyday life. I love how you describe so fully how self care has impacted your life is so many ways, from work and everyday living to feeling the gorgeous tender loving woman that you are.

212. Hear Hear! Love is already inside me. I remember this was one of the first things, I heard Serge Benhayon talk about. Not something to strive for, but something to allow myself to feel from inside. So yummy.

213. Awesome Rachel what a gift it is you give to all by embracing the woman within and living from that. I love how you expressed you have let go of perfection and now acknowledge if you don’t know something – how liberating!

214. Thank you Rachel- a heart melting article, as well as deeply inspiring.

215. Your practical advice is invaluable, thank you for your article.

216. The 7 steps to Return to Love – awesome! Easily applied to any job and way of being. Really simple and easy ways of bringing self care and love to oneself. Thank you for sharing this.

217. Great article Rachel. I loved the ‘7 Steps to Return to Love’, and how these came from a realization of the importance of self care, “..for how can you truly care for another when you do not care for yourself.”

218. Awesome sharing Rachel. 7 steps to Love.. Wow… you’ve summarized the commandments of true living. It was a healing to read this article. Thank you.

     1. Absolutely Haresh, love it… the 7 Commandments of True Living! Now THEY would change the world!!

219. We are taught that we always need to have an answer and even if we don’t know we need to pretend to have an answer. How very awesome is it then to hear somebody say “‘I don’t know’ when I don’t have the answer.” Thank you Rachel.

220. What surprised me while reading this was how I felt about myself – in the past I would of snuffed out my own self-worth, thoughts feeding me a perception that such simplicity was out of reach. But to actually read these words and consider that ‘that’s nothing unachievable’ shows me that as I have started to care for myself the idea of caring (even self-loving) for myself even more is not a complete polar opposite or way out there idea.

221. I enjoyed your blog, thank you Rachael. I loved how you expressed about learning to walk with awareness and presence and as you say “equal gentleness for me as well as for my patients is now part of the equation”. I would enjoy being your patient.

222. Thanks Rachel, for a great article, I like the bit “I have learnt to say no to things that cause me stress, and also I don’t know”, keeps life simple and honest. I myself can relate to much that has been written as a much driven perfectionist at many times through this life.

223. That’s so inspiring Rachel. It’s like you are actually a stronger person in your own tenderness… and you are more steady. I would say more efficient as well by the sounds of how you are supporting your body – that would then support your mind to stay focussed and not go into overwhelm or anxiousness, so you actually get more done and in a loving quality as well. I have learnt a lot from this blog.

     1. I agree Ariel. There is great strength and power in tenderness and Rachel walks this truth with every pore of her being, every day in her every way. Truly inspiring.

224. Absolutely beautiful Rachel having you as a dentist would be such a blessing. I particularly loved this part “Everything I do is infused with the quality I am in when that task is being done.” I find when I allow myself to bring this level of care and self responsibility to my day there is such a lovely feeling in my body.

225. I can relate here to the driven self critical perfectionist streak. I have found it a priceless revelation to find that all I have to do is just be truly loving towards myself in everything I do and then there is no trying – this self care and love will naturally overflow outwards to others around me at work and elsewhere in my life.

     1. So true Andrew, this makes so much sense! But it is still very much a work in progress for me, there are so many believe systems going against this approach to life, that I keep falling back into the old striving for this and that. It takes the moment to moment awareness and claiming that choice to really change this old pattern, which sets in like an autopilot.

226. Hi Rachel -I want to have you as my dentist!
     “I have learned that I am responsible for my state of being (the quality I bring), but not the choices of others”. This really resonates for me as it challenges me in my trying to please others in order to keep my day “calm”. Bringing me to the day is enough and I need to allow others to do the same without feeling responsible for their choices.

227. I just loved reading your article Rachel. Thank-you for taking me into your world. I feel I have been privy to your beautiful unfoldment through dedicated self-care and nurture. I am inspired by what you have achieved for yourself and with your team at work. I love the idea of ‘lovely, light, fun, dedicated in equal measure’.

     1. It has been quite a process, and having just re-read this blog so much has developed since this time. It is a wonderful thing to stop and take stock, because in the midst of the changes it can feel as though very little has altered. It was not until I wrote this blog that I could appreciate the enormity of what has taken place and how vastly I have developed in my relationship to myself.
        In university we develop skill to do a job…no skill in self awareness or how to care for ourselves to deliver that job with quality. That is where Serge Benhayon has been a game changer. He is the first person I know who has taught how valuable the quality is, and how to live in a way that the quality is assured.

228. Rachel, this is gorgeous — and I can so relate to what you say when you write that at university the constant message was that we are never enough, and that the never-ending strive to perfection is like beating our heads against the wall, because of course we never get there. The world at large makes it about what marks you get at school, and what and how much you can do, and not about who you are. Reconnecting to the essence of who I am, and bringing this exquisite tender quality to all that I do has been amazing. No longer do I define myself by what I do or measure myself as good or bad depending on my performance. I know I am a woman first and then my profession — and my colleagues and everyone I interact with get to feel the exquisite quality of tenderness and joy that naturally comes from someone who is connected to the essence of who they are and brings that to their work.

229. Wow Rachel, what an amazing blog – and what an amazing difference you make, not just to your patients and collegues, but for ALL of us.

230. Rachel, thank you for sharing. I have made the same experience, the level of how I nurture myself throughout the day makes the difference.

231. As I read this amazing blog Rachel, all I wanted to do was be a patient of yours, or one of your dental nurses! How nurturing and honouring it would be to have this depth of care from all health professionals. We would all be looking forward to our appointments – not fearing them! I can feel the deep commitment that you have made to you, and how that in turn flows on to everyone you meet during your day. Your sharing encapsulates the wonderful wisdom that Serge Behayon has presented to you, me and many thousands of others; how the truth is so simple, and that it begins with us accepting ourselves for the amazing beings that we are, and that this truth has always be there waiting for us.

     1. Agreed Ingrid. As one who was actually slapped by a dentist in my childhood, (probably a tap more like it, but the impact was horrendous) I can feel the gradual stripping away of all the false ideals and beliefs you have been been cloaked with Rachel and I too would love to be a patient of yours… not so much a dental nurse though…! You too have appreciated the teaching of the Ancient Wisdom as shared by Serge Benhayon, who has reminded us to look within for everything we have been looking for, rather than outside of ourselves. An immeasurable gift!

        1. A tap or a slap to a frightened or anxious child is one and the same thing. It is the sign of a person (dentist) who is out of control with their frustration. How amazing that we can let things degenerate to such a point that no one questions tantrum-like behaviour from an adult! It was a sign of the times, when the dentist or doctor had quite tyrannical power over their staff and patients. I have known 2 dentists who threw used needles at their nurses, like darts at a dart board!!! They should have been reported to the police, but the staff members (the potential “dart boards”) just laughed it off as Dr X and Dr Y in a bad mood! Outrageous!
           It is different now, but is only because parents and staff will no longer tolerate any sort of dodgy behaviour from the health care professional. However, the underlying emotional problems are still there for many professionals – they are just expressed differently, hidden under a nicer façade.

232. I so agree with you – one of the most wonderful things I have learned is to say “I don’t know” rather than pull something in so I always have an answer or a solution.

     1. Same here Gabriele – I was just thinking how I used to be afraid to say I didn’t know, thinking it made me silly or not respected. Yet now it’s so much simpler to say when I don’t know – instead of trying to pretend I do.

        1. A great point David and an important example of how we do not have to live up to something we are not. We can just simply be ourselves.

     2. The pretence that we have to know is like a double whammy of tension, first the pretence itself and then the answer we come up with that has to be held up by a false effort because there is nothing solid behind it. Completely draining. It also shuts us down to the possibility of gaining true insight into the problem and understanding.
        Why are we not taught this when we are young??

233. A beautiful article Rachel…so easily applicable to my life and to the lives of any other people who read this. A practical ABC of how to let go of stress and to start expressing the love that we are.

234. So true Rachel that our studies can teach us that we are never enough. I too went in the act of perfection to gain a feeling of self worth but neglected the anxiousness and hardness it caused in my body. After many years of working and living like this I could feel that I was continuously fed by the anxiousness I had build in my body, not giving myself time to be with myself, always looking for something I can do in order to feel my self of any worth. Recently I am learning how to treat this anxiousness by listening to my body and to allow more time for myself. Thank you for reminding me of the fact that there is a harmonious timing in which to do things. I can feel that this is true and when I can live like this my body will be able to expand and fill itself up with joy and harmony that is natural to it.

235. Were I living in Sydney, Rachel, you are the kind of dentist I would want working on my teeth! If and when we take absolute care of ourselves, we cannot help but naturally provide that same level of care for those we come into contact and interact with. Your article captures very strongly the quality of service that you are providing all of your patients through your work, and it inspires me to do the same in all of my work. Indeed, this – and your lived example – is a source of inspiration for the whole world, of what true and loving service can look like.

236. I too used to think that life was about putting everyone else first, before me. I got stressed and burned out. Since listening to Universal Medicine presentations I have been inspired to put myself first and develop more love for myself. I am then in a much better place to support not only myself but others as well. Win win..

237. Beautiful Rachel; “The most wonderful thing I have learned to say is “I don’t know” when I don’t have the answer, understanding that this is not a sign of failure or inadequacy.” To not go in perfection – that is huge, but what freedom arises when we are able to admit we don’t know. And as you say, truth is there the moment we do not strive for perfection. Perfection keeps us away from who we are, it is just a distraction, and a very painful distraction because of the pressure we put on ourselves and our bodies.

238. Thank you for sharing Rachel I love your simple steps returning to love!

239. ‘We work together, as partners and friends, and that is beautiful. We all learn self-nurturing from each other, and support each other to make work lovely, light, fun and dedicated in equal measures’ – this is absolutely incredible Rachel, and how colleagues could work together in all industries around the world.

240. Most of my life I strived to be perfect … but it never worked, there’s was always something that wasn’t quite ‘as it should be.’ It makes sense that what is behind this is not feeling good enough. The need for perfection tries to hide the fact that this is running underneath everything, but I knew deep down it was always there and I found it became an exhausting way to live.

241. Its great to read and learn about such commitment to self and career. Thanks for sharing Rachel, very inspirational blog

242. Fantastic article Rachel. I spent many years driven to get it right and to get things done. From Universal Medicine presentations and with support from their practitioners I am now making self love and self care my way, liberating the tender wise woman already within me, something I am so very much enjoying. It has already enabled me to be so different in my approach to life and how I am in it and with people. I continue to work with this and deepen my love and care for myself.

     1. T

        This is a great one to continuall work with Ruth, I am doing the same thing and have been amazed to feel how many self imposed layer of perfection there are in life. Layer by layer is so liberating as they are removed.

243. Reading your blog this morning was a little of the ‘Magic of God’ that I have just read about in the ‘Truth About Universal Medicine’ site by Gabriele Conrad. I am feeling really driven at present and it was so beautiful to be inspired by reading your words, Rachel. Thank you.

244. Awesome blog Rachel about the massive changes you have brought to your life and your work. As a health professional myself I have also followed a very similar path. From perfection and being crushed under the weight of having to get everything right and self criticism to an understanding that if I work on my connection and quality of presence with myself that this is enough. And my patients and colleagues certainly prefer it this way!

     1. So true Andrew, the striving to be perfect can be a shadow that can completely undermine our innate qualities and thus quality of productivity.

245. Rachel, reading this blog felt like looking in the mirror as I have had a very similar path of “drive for perfection” and not ever feeling enough. You so beautifully laid out simple and practical steps for anyone to follow to begin living in a way that is more self-loving and thus gain a greater sense of self-worth and love for others. I have noticed the same type of thing that you have described, in that people will come up to me and share very intimate aspects of their lives spontaneously without any prompting. This I feel is a direct result of just allowing people to be without any need or agenda, something we all want others to do for ourselves, as so much of our society is based on constantly needing to prove ourselves. We all know deep inside that this way is not healthy or sustainable, and once I have begun to let go of this pressure I put on myself, things seem to almost magically happen to support me in my life.

246. Gorgeous to reread this Rachel, I can hear your voice as I read it and it is exquisite.

247. Gorgeous blog Rachel and so inspiring. I love what you share and I particularly love your summary when you say –
     “Through Universal Medicine I learned that everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME. This inspired me to make self- care and self-love my way, to liberate the lovely, tender, and innately wise woman that was ALREADY THERE.”
     As you’ve beautifully said, we live in a world that tells us we need to be a ‘success’ and completely negate ourselves in the process. This had been my way up until I began to attend courses presented by Universal Medicine. In my experience no one else has presented such practical life changing simplicity before.
     This blog is such a shining example showing us the benefits of true self-care and how it can improve the quality of our lives and those around us – pearls of wisdom for sure, and thank you for sharing

248. I love your 7 steps to love Rachel. A very inspiring article from a very amazing and inspiring woman!

249. Thank you for sharing this Rachel, there is so much in this – truly inspirational! It’s one of those Blogs that you print out and keep by your bedside to remind yourself each day of the loving steps to success… to LIFE!

250. I love this story of a return to love from the lovelessness dictated by an education system without even a seed of love at its core. It is very inspiring to hear how you mastered one thing at a time and gradually brought love into every aspect of your life.

251. Love, love this blog Rachel and one that I will re-read many times.

252. Dear Rachel, imagine if more dentists were like you! I love the way you returned to love choosing to be a woman first with your beauty, presence and deep awareness of your body. This is deeply inspiring.

253. As always Rachel, your chronicle of wisdom is inspiring! Your Seven steps to return to Love is an indispensable guide.

254. Your 7 steps to return to Love are pure gold Rachel. I can feel how by using these steps as a guide, it can alter everything we do throughout our day, including the way we move and walk. Thank you for sharing them with us.

255. Thank-you, Rachel Mascord. Reading this confirms so much for me as I too, held onto a perfection that could never be achieved and would only bring anxiousness and a nervous quality to all that I did. I have found now that just by bringing awareness to my body, I can actually feel it as an unsettledness in my belly and thanks to the presentations by Serge Benhayon, I now realise that this is coming from a feeling of not being able to deal with what is coming my way. Instead of obsessing about it and getting into the “why am I not perfecting this?” stuff… I find now I just have to feel it, ask myself where I went off track and make the simple changes – like returning to a gentle presence as I wash my hands, as I sit in a chair, as I feel the breath enter my lungs. Then I realise, as you have so beautifully put, “that everything I needed was already inside of me”. It is a treasure chest of glorious proportions!!

256. Rachel,I love how you have presented so clearly for us, the 7 steps to return to love. I know I will keep refering to this list.

     1. I so agree, Elizabeth, an inspiringly beautiful blog.

257. Thank You Dr.Rachel Mascord for yet another powerfull piece of writing that you are sharing – it is simply profound and life changing for anyone ready to make real true change. I have lots to say but to keep it simple, I agree with point 1 – when I gave up gluten and dairy I never got bronchitis again and had this all my life.
     point 2 – choosing to go bed early consistently has been the key for me in all areas of my life. It has allowed me over the years to deal with my exhaustion and hidden anxiety.
     AND the biggest revelation I got from Universal Medicine was as you say too – that Everything I need is already inside me. This site and all the writers and those who comment like myself are deeply blessed. I feel honoured to be a part of this ‘speaking truth’ forever growing blogsite.

258. I found this deep inspiring, and very practical too.

259. I loved reading this blog Rachel. I loved reading about your journey from disregard to self love and the simple techniques you use to stay there. What resonated with me particularly was when you said “The most wonderful thing I have learned to say is “I don’t know” when I don’t have the answer, understanding that this is not a sign of failure or inadequacy”.

     I have just started a new job as a secondary school teacher in an inner city school. I have been given a particularly challenging class but I asked for support because I didn’t see my struggle with them as a personal failure. In letting that support come in I feel this week has been a turning point for me and this particular class and we can hopefully move forwards in a productive way. In the old days I would have felt ashamed in asking for help or in admitting I wasn’t coping well and would probably have seen myself as a failure for not being on top of things leading to and building on the lack of self worth I already had. In asking for help it was actually confirming as I wasn’t putting myself under pressure to be perfect.

     The result of all of this is not only am I turning the behaviour around in my class and they are learning, I got to deepen my connection to my colleagues who also confirmed just how much they find the class challenging too, and I got to to come away from school with my self appreciation as strong as ever!

260. Delightful blog to read, thank you so much for sharing!

261. Rachel, I am thrilled to feel how true and loving you are in all you do. Like Elaine, I love your 7 steps to return to love. I know they work because I do most of those things too. I am moved by the profoundness of your article to a deeper commitment to honoring myself in these ways. Thank you!

262. How many of us start out wanting to get it right and how entrenched this desire can be. I love your 7 steps to love and your bringing the loveliness of yourself as a woman to your work. This blog just unfolds and expands until we can feel the fullness of who you are. Beautiful. Thank you.

263. I totally agree Rachel, how can we possibly know how to care for another , if we do not know how to care for ourselves.

264. Wow Rachel, the power that I feel in these words “Today I bring that woman, in full, to the practice of dentistry.” is awesome. And how truly beautiful it must be to sit in the chair as a client! Thank you for sharing the practicalities of your Return to Love and how you embrace this in daily life. Inspiring!

265. Rachel this has deeply inspired me today. There is so much I can relate to about having the perfect picture, image and the complete emptiness in striving for that. I love your list of 7 points and the feel of more and more strength as I read the article. Simply taking care to wash your hands and connect between patients or lovingly resting/walking rather than keeping yourself busy so you are prepared in yourself for being with your next patients. I see how easy it can be to try to fit so many things into the day, without first stopping and making it about the quality and care in what I am doing first and foremost.

266. This is amazing Rachel. Anxiousness and nervous energy are so draining and debilitating and yet it is taken by most as the ‘normal’ way to be as we are evermore pushed through systems such as Universities. So beautiful for you to share that there is another way to be that is super productive and deeply loving for all concerned in the process.

     1. Yes Beverley, I too have been too much in anxiousness and nervous energy in my life (school, university and work) and it is really draining and takes the joy out of life.

267. What an incredible turn around and how amazing to be able to come and see a dentist who takes such great care of herself and her team. It feels extremely supportive for all your patients as well as yourself. Thank you.

268. This is gorgeous Rachel. Thank you for sharing so openly. I am learning that our quality is the key and that it starts with how we treat ourselves 1st. Valuing and adoring who we are is fundamental!

269. Dear Rachel, this is such an inspiring piece of writing and one that I will return to. You really break down so clearly for us the evolving stages of developing a truly beautiful relationship with yourself and then with everyone around you. I am left with such a tangible feeling of how you hold yourself and others with such honouring and genuine care.

270. Rachel, truth in simplicity… love it!

     “I have opened my heart to the women I work with…we all learn self-nurturing from each other, and support each other to make work lovely, light, fun and dedicated in equal measure….”

     Thanks for the gentle reflection and the ripple effect it has for us all….

271. “At university I learned that I was never enough, and perfection in what was done was the only way to be enough. Now, no matter what the situation at work, I can bring my full presence, care and nurturing” This first part is actually very sad; that young students are trained to be perfect in what they do but are not taught that taking care of yourself first is vital ingredient of being a great dentist. Now, how awesome it is that there are dentists like you who start to change their ways in more loving, caring and nurturing ways. This is absolutely an article to show everyone, dentist or not, that there is another way to live.

272. Thank you Rachel for this powerful and delicate piece of writing. It has inspired me to go deeper in my own connection. One thing I loved reading was about how you and your work colleagues are learning from each other about self nurturing, to let each other in and be inspired by one another, that in itself is truly inspiring!

273. Wow Rachel! Thank you for this amazing sharing. I loved the practicality behind your blog. It is something that can be used by any person, in any profession. It was a treat to feel your deepening to yourself as a woman as I read more and more of your experience. Very powerful!

274. Awesome, Rachel – dropping the crushing burden of perfection with its ever shifting goal posts really is the only way to go – and not something that can be done in one’s mind but a livingness that has to be lived to become real and tangible and inspiring.

275. Brilliant account of the steps to healing and living with love!

276. Rachel, I love the way that as you have tuned into your own body’s needs you have deepened your connection to other people. It would be so good to sit in your dentist’s chair.

277. The following, ‘Through Universal Medicine I learned that everything that is needed is ALREADY INSIDE ME. This inspired me to make self-care and self-love my way, to liberate the lovely, tender, and innately wise woman that was ALREADY THERE,’ is what has helped me to let go of my visions of perfection as well, Rachel. It was awesome hearing, then accepting, that we already are all we could ever want to be and to then find our own ways of living from there.

     The way you bring the loving, self-caring woman to dentistry provides great inspiration for everyone’s life and way of working – especially saying NO to what would push you beyond what your body can lovingly cope with.

278. Wow what a dentist, you are revolutionising Dentistry. I worked as a dental nurse for several years and this is the complete opposite of my experience. When you mentioned the seven steps to returning to Love, I felt one of my steps was learning to say no. It is a little word, but it is a word I used when learning to honour myself. You also mentioned later in your blog that this was an important step for yourself. No, for me meant acknowledging and voicing when something did not work for me. At first it was hard to say, but it got easier as I learnt it had huge ramifications on my quality of life and others appreciated hearing the truth from me. I Love your blogs Rachel, they are magic.

279. Rachel this is such a lovely and insightful piece of writing. I especially relate to the ‘perfection’ demands. I can see this article in a dentist’s newsletter or magazine for professionals – it feels as if it should be shared with those who could really benefit from reading it. Thank you for sharing this.

     1. Agree Debra, the ‘perfection’ demands resonate with me too and it is very exhausting as it is endless and impossible to achieve.

280. Rachel, what an awesome blog! You have given us such a clear, unadulterated picture of how we hang ourselves on the scaffolding of ‘perfection’.

     ‘Perfection’ is an ideal that LOOKS so good – who could fault us if we adopt that??? And yet, as you have so beautifully exposed, it is the very thing obstructing the way of true love, joy, and the living of life itself.

     I love the wisdom of ‘allowing’ that is expressed in your words, ‘I had an absolute obligation to squeeze people in…now I do what I can, and no more’. Also your ability to say, ‘I don’t know’. Recently, a client asked me a question I did not know how to answer and I said ‘I don’t know’. Two minutes later as I was sitting in the next room, while her treatment was taking place, the answer just dropped in.

281. Love your blog Rachel! You are an amazing, inspiring Woman.

     1. Seconded! Without reservation.

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