Unique Expression

Recently I had a really sore throat, making it very painful to talk. I realised being unable to talk was actually a blessing as it revealed something about the way I talk and my unique expression that I have been struggling with for years.

I saw how there are times when my outward expression, namely my voice, doesn’t always match the gentleness that I feel inside. I have noticed my voice can feel harsh as I speak and then I can sound insensitive or judgemental, which leaves me feeling bewildered because of this inconsistency.

During this sore throat episode I had an esoteric connective tissue therapy treatment. In this session, I pondered on my way of expressing and the lack of gentleness coming through my voice.

When I hear harshness in my own voice, is it because I am trying to make it sound like someone else’s, and in that moment I don’t actually know what my own voice naturally sounds like?

I realised the harshness I feel is because the communication isn’t from me, it isn’t the true me.

I was listening to everyone else’s expression and how they talked, then choosing to compare myself to them, and consequently being hard and judgmental on myself, and everyone else.

During my connective tissue session, an image came to me of diverse, magnificently coloured corals growing under crystal clear waters. My insight in that moment was that our expressions are like that coral – they appear very different to one another but are all equally unique and gorgeous in their own way.

I understood that the individual ways in which we express are all equally significant and valid – indeed it is crucial that there is a variety.

I could feel right then how destructive and crippling comparison is, and is simply not needed; everyone’s individual expression together makes up the whole, just as each coral together make a reef.

I realise now that it makes no sense at all to try to be like another: it feels important to let go of comparison and let my own voice, my own unique expression evolve into what it naturally is.

I continue to be inspired by Serge Benhayon, Universal Medicine and Esoteric Practitioners, Rebecca Poole and Jenny Ellis who support me to investigate what I need to with such love and kindness.

by Suzanne Anderssen

Further Reading:
Communicating with, and Talking to People – No longer Calibrating my Expression
“Expression is Everything” – How I Feel About Myself, the World and Other People
Am I Allowed to be this? Finding a Balance in True Expression


842 thoughts on “Unique Expression

  1. We are all the same but different and that can be hard to appreciate if what we are looking for is to be better-than. It is very interesting to observe how those who are completely at ease and content with themselves, and equally at ease and content with everyone else in whatever their expression might look like, can either disarm or infuriate others around as they do not participate and feed the game that seeks individuality.

  2. We are all like different notes in the one song, without one the song is discordant, with all the notes there is a beautiful harmony.

    1. Together we are so much more, ‘the individual ways in which we express are all equally significant and valid – indeed it is crucial that there is a variety.’

    2. Beautifully said Melinda as was the comment made
      “just as each coral together make a reef.”
      It has taken me a long time due to the way we are raised and educated to appreciate that together we can be so much more than when we live as individuals.

  3. It’s beautiful to make the connection between our voice and the opportunity to express who we are in essence in this world. What a blessing it is to hear and feel another’s love, joy, and tenderness in their voice.

  4. Recently I heard a recording of my own voice and immediately I noticed the thoughts came flooding in with comparison and judgement. It was great to be aware of this because I was then able to let go of the comparison and judgement once I nominated what I was doing.

  5. ‘I realise now that it makes no sense at all to try to be like another: it feels important to let go of comparison and let my own voice, my own unique expression evolve into what it naturally is.’ Yes coming from who we are on the inside is what counts, coming from the outside, makes us compare and insecure of who we are although we all deep down know who we are.

  6. The more I live in my power and authority and express from this space, I notice the quality of my voice is totally different and much more harmonious and healing for the listener.

  7. When there is any outcome needed that is driving our expression, the sound of our voice will reflect this. The quality of vibration being expressed is what is being voiced as the vibration of sound resonating from our bodies. When we express or speak from our connection to our body and Soul, our essence, our voice will naturally express with the sound that represents the vibration that we are aligned to in an effortless way that is unique to us all, voicing the divinity that we are within. When we are with ourselves, the love we are within, there can be no comparison as we are already everything and the expression of this quality is a sheer joy.

    1. Wow Carola, beautifully and powerfully expressed, and I absolutely agree, it is pure joy to express from our Soul and the vibration is deeply healing.

  8. It is interesting the huge difference in sound when we speak with our true voice and the warmth of the vibration that resonates harmoniously through our whole body with a beholding quality when we are connected to ourselves and what we are feeling from our essence compared with the higher tone and shallower vibration when we speak from our mind and our throat with the feeling that the words fall away hollow and empty.

  9. Our expression is very powerful, how we use this affects everyone around us. We can either express with authority, love, and truth or express with contraction, judgement and delaying our evolution. It is important to be aware of how we use our voice and constantly take responsibility for all that we express.

    1. Very well said Eduardo, and this shows that we communicate with more than just words and body language. Understanding communication on a vibrational calls us to take responsibility for everything we express.

  10. I like the analogy of the coral and how they are individual but together make up the reef as this is a reflection back to humanity from nature to remind us that this way of living can be ours too if we choose to adopt it. And we need to understand that we are creating all the misery in life because we insist on being an individual to the detriment of our community.

  11. Thinking that we should sound (or look) like someone else, or in fact anything other than being ourselves, is debilitating. Our job is to make sure that what we consider ourselves to be is really the expression of the innate, true essence of who we are.

  12. I sometimes also listen to my voice and think: is that me? It is so heavy and serious. But many times I can also listen to my voice and actually enjoy listening to my self. The difference is the connection to me.

  13. Thank you Suzanne, I enjoyed reading your words on the difference between when we express ourselves and how our voice and words are, and when we are not being ourselves. Feeling inspired to really pay attention to this, thank you.

  14. I was speaking with an old friend the other day and although I enjoyed speaking with her I could feel immense tension and push in her voice and tone that felt harming in my body, this experience reflected to me the responsibility we all hold when we express.

  15. I have found the same Suzanne. . .”that there are times when my outward expression, namely my voice, doesn’t always match the gentleness that I feel inside” . . . my voice sometimes go up and I feel how it is actually disturbing my body.

  16. It’s the energy we are reading that is behind what is being said that we are picking up on. For example someone can say something very sweet to you, by reading the energy behind their expression you can feel jealousy, and so the sweet words expressed are hollow and meaningless.

    1. Mary what you are sharing here is there is so much more being expressed than words, there is an energy which is also communicating much more.

    2. Great point Mary and it is apparent that we pick up not only the words communicated to us, we can also pick up the vibration of what is intentionally expressed.

      1. Yes, the words communicated can be the same as another,’s words but the vibration and intention can make such a huge difference on what is delivered.

    3. There is also the converse where we can judge someone, perhaps from how they look, and miss the expression of who they are carried through their voice.

  17. I too am becoming more aware of the importance of my tone of voice and how harsh it comes out sometimes – particularly when I am being emotional and reacting to something. But what I also am realising is that I have a responsibility to change this pattern as the harm we can inflict on others with not only what we say, but how we say it, can be significant.

  18. I remember hearing my voice on a recording once and thinking that doesn’t sound like me. I have kept my voice soft and held back most of my life, to keep myself hidden, these days I am finding my true voice, with much more power and truthfulness in it as I am less holding back.

  19. ‘When I hear harshness in my own voice, is it because I am trying to make it sound like someone else’s, and in that moment I don’t actually know what my own voice naturally sounds like?’ I heard my own voice recently on a recording, it’s been a long time since I’ve heard myself played back on a recording and I was amazed how comfortable I was with it. I was comfortable because my voice sound true, it sounded like me and not a version of me that wants to fit in or sound like someone else. It felt so lovely to hear the quality of my voice and appreciate what I was hearing.

  20. It is designed like this. We all bring a uniqueness that together forms the whole. Yet, we have to live it to the world and live it so it can help the others to realize that there is work to be done.

  21. Our voice is the truest marker of how we are feeling at any given moment of time. We can pretend that we are ‘fine’ and voice this, but the truth of how we are feeling comes with every word that we speak and is felt energetically by the person/s we are speaking to. If we come to understand that words are simply bundles of energy, and that energy is felt by everyone on some level, then perhaps we may start to take responsibility for each and every word that we express.

    1. Reading your comment Ingrid I find it hard to believe that we could think that we can ever cover up how we truly feel, even if our words express otherwise! We can at times though believe words instead of trusting how we feel. Reading your comment what I’ve realised is that it’s another level of integrity to match our words with how we truly feel.

  22. When we express from our connection to Soul we offer the truth that confirms who we all are in essence. And through our uniquely constellated bodies our expression resounds the way we are here to shine the truth of who we are.

  23. When I look around I see many people visibly not being themselves, but instead identifying with their job, their status, taking on roles that are at odds with who they truly are. And as they do the way they move and the way they talk changes. I too have done the same so I know how exhausting it is but I have also come to know how effortless it is when I allow my own, unique expression to flow, how life flows with it.

  24. Yes, we each have our own expression and without it someone misses out because the way we express was exactly what was needed in that moment. The clumsiness of practice is part and parcel of growing up but we seem to have forgotten that and now react to young people rather than listen and understand what is trying to be expressed.

  25. It’s actually really amazing to let seemingly small or insignificant things like losing your voice, shine some light on an area that perhaps we didn’t give much or any attention to before. I’m noticing this a lot as I allow myself to appreciate that there is no coincidence, and that everything is interlinked.

  26. It sounds like losing your voice was an enormous gift! so illness and disease can actually be an opportunity to reassess what we have taken as normal and how we have been living, so we can choose afresh.

  27. ‘there are times when my outward expression, namely my voice, doesn’t always match the gentleness that I feel inside’, yes I have this too, and with the awareness I can immediately feel I have gone into a little bit of hardness, an old habit of mine, but it feels great to clock it and read it, and not go into making myself wrong.

  28. The unique and individual ways we express are all equally important, the key is to express, and to express in our fullness, ‘I realise now that it makes no sense at all to try to be like another: it feels important to let go of comparison and let my own voice, my own unique expression evolve into what it naturally is.’

  29. I have noticed this at times with myself too, ‘ I have noticed my voice can feel harsh as I speak and then I can sound insensitive or judgemental’. I keep reminding myself to always express with love, still a refining process.

  30. I have had some interesting experiences recently with my voice and have been paying attention to how it can change beyond tone pitch and volume. When I am totally at ease with myself, and feeling connected to my body, there is a different quality and vibration to my voice. I feel it resonating from deep within. I must admit to really enjoying how my own voice sounds and feels when I’m in this place.

  31. What a simple tool, to feel our voice when we are speaking and allow us to feel it in our whole body. That alone allows me to express more from me than letting an idea dictate how and what I say.

  32. I am constantly amazed at how my voice changes depending on where I am at, at the time. It is an absolute reflection of the truth (or not) of a connection to who we are, to our essence. Working with Chris James in his expression workshops has highlighted this more than anything else. The power of our voice to heal (or harm) is a level of responsibility most of us probably prefer not to acknowledge.

    1. Thank you for the timely reminder Jenny that our voice has the power to heal or harm and that each of us has a responsibility to heal ourselves ( let go of the old baggage and hurts) and in doing so we offer healing to others.

      1. Yes to understand the power of our voices to heal is huge… not in a beautiful sound but in expressing from the truth of something we know or have lived. As a practitioner I have learnt this over many years, some of the most powerful sessions I have offered have been predominantly talking. The shifts and changes possible in another has been profound at times.

  33. Feeling our voice resonate in our body as we speak, supports us to stay present and not calibrate to another so easily.

  34. It is great to listen to ones own voice, as it keeps us in the moment and very present with ourselves. It all reflects a lot about us, which helps in many ways to understand ourselves more deeply.

    1. I so agree! I didn’t think I was much of a comparer but when I read your comment, I could feel something in me stop and I realised that when I feel that from another I too drop into comparison because I am hurt they have gone there. Rather than hold steady in where I am, I can feel the part of me that doubts what I bring is needed. I have been both sides of that equation and no-one wins 😦 a good learning.

  35. Thank you Suzanne, a voice is actually very powerful and healing when it’s spoken from ones love and tenderness, i.e. from the true essence of who we are. I have noticed that recently with some people around me and how I feel like I receive a healing from hearing them speak – it’s not the content of what they are sharing, it’s just the pure expression of who they are in their voice.

  36. This is recognize to so well, Suzanne. Sometimes I can also listen to my own voice and think is that me? But that is because I am trying to be different, putting a role and basically not expressing who I am. Fortunately through being a student of The Way of the Livingness, I know that I am loving, tender, sweet, caring and powerful man, and if I cannot hear that in my own voice, I know I am not expressing from the source that I know I am. Learning, when I hear that, I stop myself immediately.
    Thanks Suzanne, great reminder.

    1. Willem thankyou for your comment, it was beautiful to read because you have reminded me of the many people in this world dedicating themselves to living from love to express the truth of who we all are in essence in every moment.

  37. As we deepen the relationship with ourselves, with our bodies and true inner qualities, what no longer matches that vibration is very much felt and becomes very obvious.

  38. We all come into the world with our own unique expression in order to contribute and unite this with everybody else’s expression. Holding back or comparing our expression with another results in the overall expression in the world being lesser.

  39. After reading your blog the word ‘trying’ came up for me. In trying, I am putting effort into being a certain way, that is not me. I don’t need to try and be myself because I am already me. In being myself there is no trying and so there is no strain.

  40. Our voice is a great marker as to where we are, if we are angry, sad, joyful, they all have a slightly different tone, and each person’s tone is unique to them. When we go into comparison it also has its own tone, and is often cutting and destructive which is not loving for either person. When we live without comparison life is more open and more loving.

  41. When we crush our expression we crush ourselves, and it doesn’t take long for this to be reflected in the physical body.

  42. In comparison we are never enough and all that we already magnificently are is instantly negated. Through connection to who we are within we can express the love we are, with a quality that reflects our equalness yet sparkles with a uniqueness that can only be delivered through you.

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