It is ironic that responsibility and freedom are both so intrinsically connected and yet we have never stopped and paid attention to this.
Question – Why are we afraid to see that responsibility brings freedom?
Answer – Because it scares the living daylights out of us. It scares us to feel that we are so very much deeper than just ordinary beings living our lives mostly on auto-pilot and numbed and conditioned to our own follies; thinking all the time that we are a superior and intelligent race.
Where is the intelligence in letting our true selves go?
We are far more powerful than what we have reduced ourselves to, and this awakening to the fact can only come when we become responsible. This freedom of choice is free – ready – waiting for us to come back to! But how willing are we to take this path?
As I dived deeper into myself with my commitment to evolving and unshackling the barriers to true freedom, what I realised big time was that with responsibility came lessons and learnings. Some very hard lessons. When I was able to take a clear view into my past I could see that I had only been repeating these very lessons without actually taking the responsibility to learn and implement them. One of the biggest lessons of course will always be about ‘responsible choices’ in everything we do.
For me this lesson has been Epic!
How do I think? What thoughts do I have? What words do I utter?
This is huge just to feel how conditioned I had been to allow myself to think in a way that only made me live 50% of who I am. At times even less than that.
So imagine a super race car without the right kind of tyres going around the track – making pit stops that keep on lowering its capacity to stay ahead in the game. That’s how I was going around and around in life… repeating the same lessons without learning much; and yet I always knew there was a divinity in me that was wanting to burst forth in all its power, just like a supercharged turbo engine that sparks up when you turn it ON and goes the distance.
We – all of us – have not even scratched the surface when it comes to understanding who or what is responsible for the thoughts that pervade us, rule us, imprison us day and night. We are all Supercars waiting for the spark to come alive and fire us up… and yet some of us, knowing this to be true, deliberately crank it down – a paradox truly!
When I started upon this path I could easily sense and feel that surely there was something that existed that knew how to manipulate me into thinking in a manner that made me irresponsible. This ‘something’ – which I have now come to understand as the ‘spirit’ – is clever, insidious and is a master manipulator. This not only bullies but has bullied us all, individually and collectively, for thousands of years in the truest sense.
This spirit is a part of me, has always been a part of me and yet has done everything possible in its power to sabotage my true essence from playing out. This might sound like some sci-fi story but it’s true and it does not absolve me from being responsible at any single moment in time. When Serge Benhayon, through the teachings of The Ancient Wisdom, finally shed light on what exactly is the spirit and how different it is from our very Soul, I knew then the moment had come to take on my ‘spirit’ in a way that I had not ever done in my recent few lifetimes.
Once this was shown to me, or rather I chose to see it, I could now fathom the level of irresponsible behaviour that I had allowed in myself for so long.
Initially this was not just an eye-opener but also a great lesson in humility and was necessary to break down my arrogance. I could now see that everything that I thought – those thoughts that I believed only I was privy to, that no one else would ever know, what I think and how I think – was all so irresponsible.
I have seen so many times in my past that I ended up saying/doing things (actions, patterns, behaviours, speech) because of those thoughts, and then regretted having said or done things that so obviously harm and hurt people around me, and most importantly hurt me more than anything. And to now be aware of my thoughts, to catch them when they come, and to feel where they come from . . . do they come from my fears, needs, selfishness, individuality or do they come from One-ness? Doing this has made me far more responsible than I had ever been.
There is no Private Idaho!
We can’t escape into a world of thoughts and entertain them, as that does and will affect the quality of our lives and also our relationship with the world around us.
Do I hold back the Truth? Do I express Truth in reaction to any hardness or hurt, whether it’s mine or not?
This has been one of the most beautiful parts of the lesson. To know and understand that holding back truth is far more painful and harmful than saying it when it needs to be said.
I found that I had over time developed a deeply insidious and harming pattern of expressing what I thought was truth from reaction to my hurts, or in judgement to the person/group that I was expressing to. This is equally harmful when any truth is laced with an emotion that reduces us or the other. I never had any problem with being truthful as I always deep down knew I was a Guardian of Light and Truth, but over time I had allowed my behaviours and hurts to dull the luminescence of it.
It took a lot of humbling down on my knees to be able to not only see this but also break through each layer by ill-fed layer to now come to a place where I express Truth no holds barred, but in a way that is loving and evolving even if the other does not choose to feel it. Detachment whilst delivering the truth is the re-mastering process that I am enjoying with each word delivered.
Reductionism is a game I have chosen to not play ball with anymore.
It has been a revelation for me to now deeply revere and honour the truth of the All, and in this the Love that every Truth comes from. An undoing of all my past errors is a journey that keeps freeing me each time I go deeper into respecting this Truth and accepting more and more of the responsibility that I carry as a divine being on this planet.
Since then it’s been challenging no doubt to watch myself and observe and feel how I express the truth in my daily life. And I certainly do not hold back. But I am loving this, for it delivers me to my true self, each time I take responsibility in expressing/presenting truth.
It makes me highly aware of all those negative thoughts that kept me under and away from my own ‘preciousness’!
Serge Benhayon has been a super-cool mentor in showing me All of this. An elder brother who is walking this path with an integrity that shines for all those who walk it with him. With him and all the masters by my side and my deep innate connection to my Soul, I know this time around I am wisely, humbly and lovingly choosing to be Fiery and Free with each breath.
Thus the Freedom connection deepens and deepens and deepens… as does the Responsibility…
By Chetan Jha, London (UK)