Misery, Sugar and Movement

I have been overweight most of my adult life, but since changing my diet to gluten and dairy free pretty much all of that excess weight dropped away over a period of five years, and stayed off for a further seven. I worked to kick sugar too, and mostly succeeded, and more weight dropped off. But recently I’ve been eating more sugary foods (including carbohydrates and dried fruits, which are all sugar in one form or another) and have started to put some weight back on.

I always know that when I crave sweet things it means I am exhausted or feeling low for some reason and if not addressed, can lead to a mild form of depression. The trouble with eating sugar is that it gives you a lift and then drops you down even lower, so there is a cycle of feeling low, eating sugar, a moment of feeling OK then a crash back down to feeling low again. We can get into a cycle we think we can’t get out of and fall into despair.

The antidote is to be totally honest with how the body is feeling because then we can choose to look after our bodies through self-loving choices. I know that for me, when I truly love myself I naturally don’t want to eat anything containing sugar – which can also include fresh fruit – because it makes me racy and I can’t feel what’s going on around me.

Question: But how can I love myself when I feel miserable?

Answer: Awareness and Understanding.

I have the awareness that there is a certain tension in my body that I really don’t want to feel and an understanding that overeating has been my ‘go-to’ numbing device, but it’s no longer working. All I do is eat more and more sugary foods with a kind of desperate addictive behaviour. My body is warning me it’s too much because I am putting extra weight back on, so I know that I need to bring myself back to me – to re-establish my inner connection.

Thanks to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, we have been provided with many tools and techniques for bringing ourselves back into balance and one of them is the quality of our movements.

How are movements connected to being self-loving?

Our bodies are systems of delicate balance, yet we tend to treat them hard and rough even though they are really very fragile. By being especially gentle and tender in my walk, my touch, my breath, I am taking more care of my body, and that is the start to being self-loving through our movements.

When I move my hands with tenderness my whole body feels different: for example, when turning a doorknob, I have to allow my hand, my wrist and my shoulder to be gentle, which affects my back, my hips and my legs too.

Getting into a car is a challenge, especially when the seats have high sides. I do it as gracefully as I can and then close the door firmly, but not slamming it.

My voice is an obvious one because when I am racy it tends to go a bit hard, so I breathe gently and that helps to take out the hard edge.

There are many examples of ways I can be tender, and I can really feel it when other people are not being tender. For example, one I’ve particularly noticed is in ladies’ toilets – the way I hear some women attack the toilet roll or the paper towels makes me smile. It is something we do every day without thinking and that’s the point… when we do anything without conscious presence, we are not being tender.

So, coming back to the title of this piece, the way for me to feel less misery is to enjoy moments of tenderness with myself, because my body is beautiful and it feels beautiful when it is being tender: there is a stillness inside that does not allow for misery, and that stillness is shattered by anything that makes me racy. So… if I want to let go of misery, and enjoy the inner stillness, I simply have to breathe gently and move with tenderness. No sugar needed!

By Carmel Reid, Northern Rivers, Australia

Related Reading:
Are we Consuming Sugar or is Sugar Consuming us?
Quality of Movement = Quality of Life
The Dieting Misery-Go-Round

1,106 thoughts on “Misery, Sugar and Movement

  1. Eating to numb myself from what I am feeling doesn’t work anymore. But that understanding and admission doesn’t stop me from doing so. The more I connect to my essence, which has no want or need to do something it knows doesn’t work, the less I spend in the mindset that ignores past results.

  2. Movement being the key word here. As what movement have we been in or what have we been aligned to that then craves something. This is something I am still learning.

  3. “When I move my hands with tenderness my whole body feels different..” I experience this as well, the quality of my thoughts and emotional state can all literally change instantly when I allow the tenderness and grace back into my movements. The soulful quality of tenderness is like a wash through my whole body.

  4. ” because my body is beautiful and it feels beautiful when it is being tender:”
    This is an important learning, coming from the truth that one’s body is beautiful and treating it so will imitate the beauty.

  5. ‘But how can I love myself when I feel miserable?’ mmmm good question so does the cycle continue? Eat sugar etc for comfort and because we are not feeling good, then feel worse then eat more sugar? I am learning more and more that the way the cycle can be broken is indeed through our movements. Simply by walking to be with us we can change things in an instant ✨ Simply yet powerful when we choose.

  6. I’m experimenting with the seat belt of my car again as it is so easy to just get into my car and drive off with no awareness of what I’m doing as I’m so busy with where am I going, what will the traffic be like, how long will it take roughly to get there? I’m totally focused on the outside world and not what is happening to me.
    The seat belt is my stop moment to bring it all back to me to be tender with myself as I strap myself in before anything else.

  7. “The antidote is to be totally honest with how the body is feeling because then we can choose to look after our bodies through self-loving choices” Honesty is the first ingredient in true healing.

  8. “the way for me to feel less misery is to enjoy moments of tenderness with myself, because my body is beautiful and it feels beautiful when it is being tender:” Staying connected with our body can transform so many of our more negative feelings and when we move it tenderly even more so.

  9. Doing things gently is so much more joyful than doing them harshly. Joy is never that far away, just a choice really, but how often do we move in a way to ensure we don’t have any opportunity to feel it?

  10. I certainly know the pattern of feeding the tension in my body with foods that my body really doesn’t like, and the result is, I still have the tension and my body feels decidedly more yucky than it was. I have realised that I often feed this tension as I really don’t want to know what it is actually telling me, but the avoidance doesn’t solve anything, in fact it makes things worse. Note to self – be honest about what I’m avoiding so I then can avoid the foods that make my body miserable.

    1. I’ve been noticing this recently too, Ingrid, how ‘I still have the tension and my body feels decidedly more yucky than it was.’ I’m realising that this doubled up yucky-ness is not worth it anymore so I’m taking a page from your notes if you don’t mind and rather than trying to numb this tension I am feeling with food, choosing to raise the bar on the level of honesty I am willing to go to with myself.

  11. Thank you, Carmel, for the gorgeous reminder of how our movements can fill that empty-ness that I too tried to fill with sugar from a very young age and from any number of different sources. I have felt how beautiful it feels to move in a self-loving way, or to change my movements to be self-loving ones when I clock they are less than. Your blog has inspired me to bring these self-loving movements into those moments when I am still reaching for something sweet. I am realising with great joy that I am ready to let go of a lifetime sustenance of finding sweetness in the outer and instead am ready to accept and embrace my inner sweetness.

  12. Being in conscious presence (when our mind and body are doing the same thing) and when we move with the quality of tender loving care it is exquisite.

  13. It feels like you have to work hard to feel yourself miserable – in entertaining that endless self-harming thoughts, to constantly looking for something to eat to keep that uncomfortable feeling in your tummy, the constant motion to distract yourself perhaps with sporting or burying yourself in your work.

    1. This was an aha moment for me reading your comment, Willem. Sugar sustained me from a very young age and although I’ve heard it before, your drawing attention to the connection with sweetness as I read it here and now has really hit home. I can feel the utter lack of sweetness throughout my childhood and beyond and how I desperately tried to replace this lack with an outer sweetness. Thank you for your wise sharing, sweetie 🙂

      1. I echo this Brigette, appreciating Willems comment. Spending a long time in a boarding school, when we were ‘allowed’ four sweets a day after lunch set in a sweet craving that is ongoing – and always after lunch!

      2. Incredible isn’t it, Sue, how ingrained a sweet reward can become even down to the time of day? My childhood sweet craving started and has since been before the evening meal when the anticipated return of an abuser was looming and I would clock the minute they walked through the door whether abuse would take place that evening or not.

  14. Thank you for sharing Carmel. The pull of sugar is one of the most addictive things I have ever experienced and trying to use willpower to give up inevitably backfires as the root cause and understanding of the attraction to the sugar has not been truly addressed and understood – super inspiring to read of your experiences.

  15. ……’there is a stillness inside that does not allow for misery, and that stillness is shattered by anything that makes me racy.’ Connecting with our body provides us with lasting energy and vitality.

  16. This beautiful blog reminds me to be more gentle on myself and be more aware of the quality of my breath and my movements. Sometimes I can get a bit racy without sugar but by going into a rushing energy.

    1. The feeling miserable is like a confirming of how empty you feel and so the catch-22 spiral continues and confirms. Pharmaceutical companies would have us believe that the only answer to this downward spiral is to put us on a lifetime program of popping Prozac as there is no money to be made in encouraging self-love.

    1. It sure does make you more tired, but what a perfect reason to eat some more! That’s exactly how I used to live until my body began presenting me with a raft of very unpleasant symptoms, messages from my body that I could no longer ignore if I wanted to live my life to the fullest, a life where sugar has no place.

      1. It is choosing to jump onto a crazily unhealthy roller-coaster that removes all harmony from life. We need to see it as the deliberate choice that it is. I have done it, we have probably all done it.

  17. I reckon if you asked most people, especially kids “would you like to willingly live a life of misery?” Most would say no.
    And yet most foods, activities that drain us, being harsh, unloving, critical, blaming, obliged to task and much more is a normal part of daily life that leaves us miserable! As a whole we haven’t fostered a life lived from being gentle, tender and loving with ourselves but thank God there are people doing so and many more learning to live such a way.

      1. Good point Doug! We are slowly getting there – with warnings against diabetes and obesity if you eat too much sugar. And with the current craze in searching for what makes you happy a misery warning may well pay off.

      2. I love this. However, we have all the warnings of the dangers to health on packets of cigarettes yet people keep smoking. We need to find ways to stimulate them to look at and support them to heal the causes of their miserableness rather than scare them.

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