Misery, Sugar and Movement

I have been overweight most of my adult life, but since changing my diet to gluten and dairy free pretty much all of that excess weight dropped away over a period of five years, and stayed off for a further seven. I worked to kick sugar too, and mostly succeeded, and more weight dropped off. But recently I’ve been eating more sugary foods (including carbohydrates and dried fruits, which are all sugar in one form or another) and have started to put some weight back on.

I always know that when I crave sweet things it means I am exhausted or feeling low for some reason and if not addressed, can lead to a mild form of depression. The trouble with eating sugar is that it gives you a lift and then drops you down even lower, so there is a cycle of feeling low, eating sugar, a moment of feeling OK then a crash back down to feeling low again. We can get into a cycle we think we can’t get out of and fall into despair.

The antidote is to be totally honest with how the body is feeling because then we can choose to look after our bodies through self-loving choices. I know that for me, when I truly love myself I naturally don’t want to eat anything containing sugar – which can also include fresh fruit – because it makes me racy and I can’t feel what’s going on around me.

Question: But how can I love myself when I feel miserable?

Answer: Awareness and Understanding.

I have the awareness that there is a certain tension in my body that I really don’t want to feel and an understanding that overeating has been my ‘go-to’ numbing device, but it’s no longer working. All I do is eat more and more sugary foods with a kind of desperate addictive behaviour. My body is warning me it’s too much because I am putting extra weight back on, so I know that I need to bring myself back to me – to re-establish my inner connection.

Thanks to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, we have been provided with many tools and techniques for bringing ourselves back into balance and one of them is the quality of our movements.

How are movements connected to being self-loving?

Our bodies are systems of delicate balance, yet we tend to treat them hard and rough even though they are really very fragile. By being especially gentle and tender in my walk, my touch, my breath, I am taking more care of my body, and that is the start to being self-loving through our movements.

When I move my hands with tenderness my whole body feels different: for example, when turning a doorknob, I have to allow my hand, my wrist and my shoulder to be gentle, which affects my back, my hips and my legs too.

Getting into a car is a challenge, especially when the seats have high sides. I do it as gracefully as I can and then close the door firmly, but not slamming it.

My voice is an obvious one because when I am racy it tends to go a bit hard, so I breathe gently and that helps to take out the hard edge.

There are many examples of ways I can be tender, and I can really feel it when other people are not being tender. For example, one I’ve particularly noticed is in ladies’ toilets – the way I hear some women attack the toilet roll or the paper towels makes me smile. It is something we do every day without thinking and that’s the point… when we do anything without conscious presence, we are not being tender.

So, coming back to the title of this piece, the way for me to feel less misery is to enjoy moments of tenderness with myself, because my body is beautiful and it feels beautiful when it is being tender: there is a stillness inside that does not allow for misery, and that stillness is shattered by anything that makes me racy. So… if I want to let go of misery, and enjoy the inner stillness, I simply have to breathe gently and move with tenderness. No sugar needed!

By Carmel Reid, Northern Rivers, Australia

Related Reading:
Are we Consuming Sugar or is Sugar Consuming us?
Quality of Movement = Quality of Life
The Dieting Misery-Go-Round

1,040 thoughts on “Misery, Sugar and Movement

  1. Thank you Carmel for shining a light on what I can avoid in being racy ‘… there is a stillness inside that does not allow for misery, and that stillness is shattered by anything that makes me racy.’ And in that stillness we feel ourselves and all around.

  2. Even the smallest amounts of sugar make me feel tired so I was asking myself the question, today, why do I still eat it?

  3. I have become very aware of how my thoughts are influenced by what I have eaten. If I eat sugary things I often have self-doubting and negative thoughts the day after. There is a definite correlation between food and our quality of thoughts.

  4. It makes sense that when we push our body out of its natural rhythm and balance we drain and exhaust ourselves dulling our sensitivity and awareness so rather than choosing to stop and come back to ourselves to bring a quality to our movements that are self-energising we push with much effort against the natural flow and then seek the false fuel (sugar) to prop us up.

  5. I still go to fruit or sweet things sometimes when I want a lift but as you say it doesn’t last and can leave us, after a while, feeling worse than before or have us pushing ourselves through in the illusion that we are on top of things.

  6. The biggest thing I realised from my own experience about body weight is that it’s to do not just with food intake, but with energy. If we are holding onto things, not letting go, or taking on people’s stuff, emotions that are not ours then it leads a heavier mass being accumulated in the body. Letting all that go can equally see weight excess loss.

    1. This is a valid point you make here, Zofia, holding onto things often means that our critical thoughts go round and round in our heads taking us out of the present moment and circulating in our past. Our negative thoughts can be toxic to the natural harmony of our bodies.

    2. A great sharing… if energy precede form, then energy precedes food, or more like the type, quality of food we choose… and reflects the energetic state of being we are in before we get the thought of what food to eat…

  7. The more I pay attention to my thoughts and the quality of them, it becomes easier to start to say no to the negative rubbish because it starts to stand out against the quality of how I’m moving: less rushed and hurried and more ‘with myself’- ie more focused on what I’m actually doing instead of being distracted by my thoughts.

  8. Wonderful Carmel… And yes of course, as we know, feeling our voice just a little bit more is an extraordinary doorway into understanding where we are, what connection we had with ourselves, and how we are communicating with the world, and what we are communicating.

  9. The highs that we seek in the form of experiences and relationships may offer momentary elation, happiness and relief. However, just like sugar highs we cannot sustain the artificial stimulation and then we must experience the low or drop of not living in our natural harmonious way of being.

  10. The more tender and honouring I am with myself, the more beautiful I feel and the less I choose to let any of life’s distractions disturb what I feel inside. There is a sense too that this builds as an unshakeable strength the more honouring I am.

  11. There is definitely a cycle of not feeling good, eating more and feeling a bit better for a while and then dropping low again which will have us looking for relief once again. It is interesting to observe with myself that as soon as I feel discomfort that I will look for a fix instead of just feeling what I am feeling and being ok with that. Because just being with it is actually ok and then I can make the choices to not make it worse, because the fixes often make it worse on the long term.

  12. Beautifully expressed, no space for misery if we are living the stillness of our essence and then no need to seek sugar for we are full-filled.

  13. Carmel it’s changing the way we respond to ourselves, understanding that yes we need support, but choosing ways to support ourselves that don’t bring temporary relief or harm to the body, instead we can be self caring and loving with ourselves by adjusting the quality of our movements.

  14. Carmel, I really love your article, you have a way of writing so simple and practically, this stands out for me and is really helpful; ‘By being especially gentle and tender in my walk, my touch, my breath, I am taking more care of my body, and that is the start to being self-loving through our movements.’

    1. I agree Rebecca and what stands out for me is when we are being super gentle and loving with ourselves this naturally flows onto others too.

    1. Absolutely true it is our choice to move toward love or away from love. When we connect to ones own tender and gentle movements we are moving towards love.

  15. Consuming sugar is a vicious cycle, we have the sugar, get exhausted, feel low, crave more sugar, get exhausted, feel low… it’s no surprise that cocaine has virtually the same chemical component as sugar.

  16. Wise words in the whole of this article and I find them very supportive…”Our bodies are systems of delicate balance, yet we tend to treat them hard and rough even though they are really very fragile.” This is one of the main if not the main issue for us and health issues, we do not respect our bodies and we override their sensitivity.

  17. Moving is everything, those thoughts we allow, like little bits of unnecessary rubbish, they are movements too. For me it’s learning to not allow those bits of rubbish into my movements.

  18. When I feel into the lows of life I can feel how a space is created by the contraction and the dips, all of which allows for the self doubt and despair to nest in.

  19. I have noticed this tension too which can build up and then I start looking for a relief from the tension in various ways one of them being food. I have also noticed that relief is not the only option available and if we deepen in our connection within and reconnect to that still part of us that is not tense at all then we can honestly observe the tension and not be dominated by it.

  20. When we have experienced the tenderness and gentleness within our movements hardness feels awful and we know that we are off. I am more likely to feel different after I eat my lunch, especially if I have been engaging in stimulating conversation with work colleagues but when I go for a walk in the park and chat to people I feel different on returning to work.

    1. I agree, we cannot feel the details and subtle aspects of our body and health when we come in hard and rough, we need to be gentle and tender to refine and adapt our lives to be more supportive and enrich our wellbeing.

  21. We may one day realise that the way we move can actually lead to unhealthy lifestyle choices like overeating, because when we are rough, rushing, unaware of our bodies and not consciously present there is a quality of energy in the body that is not harmonious or pleasant to experience. That in itself is a type of misery because it doesn’t represent our true being or essence which is love, instead it feels quite awful to experience. Moving with connection to my essence and body and allowing each movement to express my soulful qualities of grace, loveliness, harmony, tenderness, and delicateness brings a joy into my body and being.

  22. Great when the movements we make are so deliciously sweet that no amount or version of sugar in the world comes even close to the enjoyment we feel in our body.

    1. So true Alexander, and this reminds me of when people ask me if I would like sugar in my tea, I reply, ‘no thanks, I am sweet enough already’.

  23. Sugar has been one of the hardest things for me to stop which is crazy when this is what we give children often before they can even speak.

    1. I too am finding sugar to be the hardest thing to let go off, especially when you are working late the body sometimes craves the sugar in some form to keep going.

  24. We live in a society that promotes hardness instead of gentleness. We tend to think gentleness is about being slow and an airy-fairy way of moving but true gentleness is very far from this. Our body resonates with the true qualities of gentleness and it is part of our natural and true movement. I have learned about gentleness at Universal Medicine and through the amazing presentations of Serge Benhayon.

  25. Once we have established a certain amount of tenderness, stillness, equilibrium… the ‘temptation’ of distracting, numbing or dulling ourselves may not be gone, but now that we have a sense and a knowing of the above-mentioned qualities we experience the reduction and misery that comes with giving in to the temptations (or addiction). And there comes a point when we cherish a well-balanced state of being so much that we will not want to comprise it anymore.

    1. Yes and there comes a point where the taste is no longer what it used to be. For me the taste of salt and sugar are just too strong and the initial taste is too much, it is then still easy to override that if I choose and eat the sugar but my taste buds say no to start with.

  26. When I am disconnected my voice is loud and boisterous, when I am connected to my body, my voice has a sweet melody and sounds divine even to my own ears. The sound of my voice is a dead give away as to where I am at in any given moment.

    1. You’ve reminded me of when I observe children, I notice the same thing happening to them too, and how the vibration of their voice changes when they are not connected to their body.

    2. Great what you share as I too have noticed the difference in my voice to when I have been connected to my body or far from connection to my body, as the voice sounds very different.

  27. I find it very confirming of how energetically aware we are that we know just what to eat to provide ‘hidden sugars’ even though we may think we are choosing ‘healthy food’. I find this with other foods too. I may want to eat something creamy but end up with eating tahini or macadamias. Even though they are healthy they are still in the same energetic food group that provides comfort.

  28. I know only to well the trap and contagiousness of sugar and all its implications . A beautiful sharing with understanding what is really going on and the honesty we need to address it and the effects and loving choices we can make.

  29. “Our bodies are a delicate balance” – I love this, it gets me imagining that one harsh or careless move could unbalance our whole system. And it works both ways – I find my body is enormously responsive to how I move it and take care of it, if I treat myself as precious and if I’m delicate it’s the best way to reset my internal balance.

    1. “If I treat myself as precious and if I’m delicate it’s the best way to reset my internal balance.” That is exactly how it is for me too Meg, beautifully expressed, thank you.

  30. Overeating and feeling miserable is such a vicious cycle. I am in it at the moment and I know there is no end to it unless I choose otherwise so this was a good blog to read today. Practising tenderness and gentleness will be my focus today.

    1. I know what you mean, for me it is not over eating but the wrong food that does not agree with my stomach, makes me feel miserable, which is a vicious cycle.

  31. When we get stuck in a rut that we think we cannot get out of, it is often a spark from someone or something that ignites and/or inspires us to see beyond our trench and make the steps to pull ourselves up and out.

  32. I am finding movement so important in my day… to take a walk, or even just to get up and move around the workspace, allows for the release of any mentally created tension I’ve allowed and helps me come back to feeling my body and moving in a way that is truly supportive for it.

    1. I’m finding the same Paula, I can sometimes feel quite awful in myself emotionally when I wake up, and after getting up and moving about gently attending to tasks in the home I bring myself back to a lovely state of being and can feel remarkably better – just from the quality of my movements.

  33. It can be hard to come out of the addiction to sugar as it comes from a pattern of bringing something from the outside in to feel the sweetness in us. But when we start to give this loving attention to ourselves step by step we see it is much more easy.

  34. i love your absolute honesty here Carmel, your observation and understanding which brings you away from the idea that will power can solve anything, and the beating up we can give ourselves when will power doesn’t work. When we know it’s about re-establishing our inner connection, it makes so much more sense to look at what else is happening in life.

  35. When we do things without conscious presence, when we do not move absolutely honoring our divine being, we lose the connection to that divine being, that beauty, and we end up feeling miserable, discontent, which make us grab things from the outside to cover it up.

  36. Bringing awareness to the smallest of movements changes the way my whole body feels. The delicacy at the tips of our fingers can ripple through our whole bodies if we simply allow it… in a breath, a momentary pause and a willingness to feel.

    1. I agree Matilda, I fidn the same too and it starts with something so simple like being tender and delicate with our finger tips. My body loves it and so naturally it supports me to allow my whole body to be delicate and tender. And with this I get more of a sense of authority and presence in my body.

  37. Especially when under tension the choice to either seek relief or to raise one’s vibration is very present, a learning on our way out of the identification with tension back to knowing and living who we are within the tension.

    1. That’s the key in life Alex, indeed. To be oneself with the tension, because tension is a part of life, and the solution is not to avoid the tension. The more you give the full of you (which is not a doing) the less holding the tensions have on us.

    2. That’s great Alex because we so often just want relief from the tension but to know that we actually will always have tension it’s our relationship with tension is what makes it something we want to rid ourselves of or deepen into.

    3. To allow the pull of the tension in our awareness of the discordance in life is what will guide us beyond the way things currently are… our resistance and the many ways we do this just perpetuates the discordance.

  38. When we look at the amounts of sugar many children eat, in processed foods, in biscuits, cakes and in sweets (lollies), it certainly explains bad behaviour, because they must be feeling so miserable inside and not-them. What is sad is when parents reward them with sweets for being good, not realising it was probably the sweets that caused the bad behaviour in the first place.

    1. Yes, such valid observations, we feed that what we do not want and reward ourselves with something that is harming us.

    2. A properly mad cycle to be in, yes Carmel. And actually connecting bad behaviour with feeling miserable inside because we are not ourselves, really helps to understand our own and anyone else’s waywardness.

    3. Yes agree Carmel, Esther, Matilda – and, perhaps one of the reasons parents give children sweets is because they themselves live with that same level of reward (with other substances/foods etc) – so we are passing behaviours through generations – we don’t deal with life, and we reward with food etc, we do the same with our young and so the cycle perpetuates.

    4. Great point Carmel, it made me laugh when I read the last part of your comment. It is so true that we use sugar as a huge form of reward and when we understand what sugar does to our body and to how we respond to life, it is no reward at all.

  39. The misery of sugar and all its addiction and buisness with the loss of connection stillness and joy within is something i know so well and a way I used to live and it is only now with changing the way i live and eat that i can truly appreciate the effects of sugar on my body my awareness the quality and purpose of life and the learning process this is in every movement .

  40. Misery and sugar….yes the misery of going numb and missing ourselves, not being connected with ourselves, because sugar and eating a lot of it, gets us to check out and not feel. That is my experience, and movement, when we move with awareness and connection, then the sweetness of flow and stillness is with us and sugar is bitter. I have days when I feel flat and that is when the thought might come in to sweeten things up with some sugar… when I move with purpose there is no sugary recipe in the world that will take me away from that. It is so much to do with how we move.

  41. Actually we all, everyone is so sensitive and tender that anything that doesn’t match that tenderness is felt as a disharmony, disturbance or even assault on our body and being, but depending on the coping mechanisms we develop we may either have numbed ourselves or became over-sensitive which actually means we have not learned to process the input appropriately and thus are overwhelmed by the onslaught of stimuli. But at any point in time we can learn to restore our natural senses and the ability to handle it.

  42. Eating sugar can be an addictive pattern that is hard to break free of, and one we often don’t go to the root cause of – why do we crave that food in the first place? Is it a deep seeded exhaustion, a lack of joy and spark in life, a desire to ease a tension or to race the body to not feel? When we ask these questions it removes the power and emphasis on the food and returns it to us and how we are feeling

  43. Carmel thank you so much this is beautiful what you share, simple to understand and apply to our lives. Bringing awareness and understanding to our movements.

  44. Carmel, the fact that we get more tired and can get depressed after eating sugar is something that is really important to discuss. It is not often talked about but can explain why we maybe feeling low.

  45. “…there is a stillness inside that does not allow for misery, and that stillness is shattered by anything that makes me racy.” Esoteric Yoga supports me to feel the stillness inside – which feels really beautiful. When I get pulled away from this – rephrase – when I choose to pull away from this – then I may go searching for something to nibble. This is not very supportive behaviour and I’m catching more easily these days.

  46. I finally had a stop moment that gave me the full impulse to stop eating fruit and I’m currently on Day 7 of no-nuts and no-fruit and I’m feeling more steady and more still inside and am finding that my ability to read situations is already evolving.

  47. I love the simplicity and truth of what you have said Carmel. To avoid feeling miserable and down, choose gentle movements which brings us back to the love and inner sweetness that we are, so no need for sugar.

  48. In bringing absolute honesty to what we feel from our bodies we can connect to a wisdom which is greater than anything we can imagine. All starts with simple honesty and a relationship with our bodies.

  49. It is great that in this blog you are sharing that it is wise to look at why you are eating or craving certain foods in the first place and deal with that, rather than just trying to cut them out, using will power which in my experience never works for long.

    1. So true Andrew – will power doesn’t cut it in the long run and the old behaviour will reappear., as I have discovered. Addressing the reasons why a behaviour exists gets to the root of the issue.

    2. Great point Andrew … it seems to me that what we choose to eat is the end product of how we have been living in the in-between period between meal times… Do we eat on the run? in a rush, standing and not sitting? have we let emotions / reactions in that need pacifying/numbing? There’s a lot more going on than just simply having a bite to eat.

  50. I like the way that you have made a connection here between love-for-yourself and eating sugar. And I find that it can sometimes be the case that when there is huge amounts of love being offered to me, often by someone else, I will also reach for the sugar, just as much as I will reach for it when times feel loveless.

  51. It is so amazing that in one simple movement so many parts of our human body come in to play and are affected, nothing is in isolation from anything else, all a beautiful interconnectedness within this vast universe.

  52. When we are in the company of someone who is truly gentle and tender in their body it feels like there is a permission for us to be the same way. This can be confronting for some people although other allows themselves to surrender and also return to a naturally tender way of being and expressing.

  53. Once you start reducing sugar in your life, the many places it hides become super obvious. The body tells you loud and clear when you have eaten something sweet.

  54. The tension can feel almost unbearable but it is of the mind whereas the body is the steady backdrop that we can always refer to and connect with. Its wisdom is unbeatable.

    1. I agree, Michael – we have everything there at our fingertips – limitless wisdom and support available to us for us to live the divinity that we are. It comes down to one choice – are we saying a big Yes to this or not.

  55. So true Carmel that when we are full of stillness there is no space for misery or any other negativity… stillness is full of exquisiteness: love, grace, joy and harmony.

  56. Do we consume sugar which then alters the way we move or do we move in a way that alters our physiology and then ‘feel’ the craving for sugar?

    1. Great question, Michael – and what is it that causes us to move in a way where we find our selves craving sugar, or other substances that take us away from our stillness? It’s as though another energy has crept into the pilot seat and is forcefully driving us to self-destruct.

    1. At least then we are giving our selves the opportunity to nominate what is driving us to feel this way and renounce whatever it is. Clocking and calling out the offending energy in this way is immensely powerful, it may seem like a small thing, but with commitment and consistency it’s our path home.

  57. I have been off sugar recently and absolutely loving the impact on my body and the new steadiness I am allowing. Yesterday I had a mouthful of a biscuit and immediately didn’t eat the rest as the sugar was so overwhelming and this morning I am a little foggy in the head. The more I honour the lovely steady feeling within and place that as all important the less I will want even a mouthful.

    1. I love how our bodies so readily respond to our loving choices! Once we stop eating sugar, then anything sweet – even a piece of fruit or green peas – will have a sweetness about them. Its like our bodies create a radar for the types of foods we have given up and let us know loud and clear if we slip up and eat some of it… which is so supportive and inspiring.

  58. So true Carmel that some women try to minimise the time it takes them to visit the bathroom, rushing on the way in and the way out. What if in taking the time to check the mirror, wash hands more gracefully etc. we had a moment to reflect on our day and rejuvenate for whatever was next?

  59. It’s our honesty that allows the awareness, then without judgment, we are offered the understanding which then invites us to make more loving choices moving forward.

  60. I am seeing that the food I eat is the end result to how I have been with myself. There is no good or bad with my choices – even though I can think that from time to time. But really all these choices that I make are highlighting that there is something deeper to look at and feel. One of the aspects that I keep returning to is the quality of my movements, but its not just physical movement either. Often its can be a expectation or ideal that I have of the way something should be, leads me to a way of thinking that allows me to eat in a particular way, that is not supportive. Its so obvious when I eat to nourish and support, but there are threads that I allow in where the end result is me eating either way more or make not so good choices.

  61. I find it amazing how paying attention to the way we turn the door knob can have such a ripple effect to how we the start to move and behave elsewhere in life.

    1. I agree, Eva, bringing this detail and awareness into one very tiny area of our life, with consistency, sets a new standard, which we can then apply to other areas, gradually bringing this new standard to all areas of our life. These standards have the potential to be forever deepening and evolving.

  62. It is worth an experiment or actually self-observation to honestly feel what emotionally is going on when we crave certain foods or drinks – most often we will find ourselves emotionally needy, a need that food cannot really satisfy but compensate, ie. substitute and suppress, only for the need to return and return over and over again until we take care of it appropriately.

    1. It is so true Alexander when we crave certain foods to satisfy a negative feeling and have a moment of pleasure or relief it is only ever satisfying for a few moments in our mouths and then the dissatisfaction returns. The source of dissatisfaction is however within us or in something we have taken on from life that is in truth not us.

  63. I love this; ‘The antidote is to be totally honest with how the body is feeling because then we can choose to look after our bodies through self-loving choices.’ What I find is that it actually feels great to really feel into my body, to be honest if I am feeling tired and to notice how my feet, shoulders and back etc feel and whether they are achy or not. Having stop moments in my day, even for a few minutes feels really supportive for this. What I really love is lying down for 5 minutes if I am feeling a bit tired, I then feel deeply into my body and can often let go of tension that maybe there.

  64. This is so great to be aware of; ‘I always know that when I crave sweet things it means I am exhausted or feeling low for some reason and if not addressed, can lead to a mild form of depression.’

  65. It is the everyday moments of our connection with our body and being in sync with our body that in truth make our day, as it deepens our relationship with ourselves and lets us feel where we are truly at.

    1. Exactly, so when we are disconnected and we hear the door slam harsh and loud behind us, it is a reflection for us to look at why we were not truly with ourselves in that moment. A simple learning without placing any need for perfection on ourselves.

      1. Yes, I love that Eva, it is just a taken note instead of ignoring / dismissing it and to feel how it is for ourselves. Does the way we move through life allow for an environment we want to live in? And if not we ourselves can step by step introduce the changes in our own awareness and movement that brings a quality to life that we feel truly at home in.

    2. All these little moments that we get to feel and appreciate the yumminess that we are add up so much that we then do not crave or need a sweetener as we are already sweet enough! There is nothing more fullfilling and satisfying then feeling who we truly are and living this as much as possible.

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