I recall being a very playful and joyful child, always wanting to have fun and play games, and anything could be made into a game. I also remember that something happened to this. I started to feel very sad, and I was confused as to why the rest of my family or world wasn’t the fun that I knew. I spent many hours laying under or in my bed crying for no reason other than ‘it hurts’. This crying went on until I was about 15 – then I toughened up to be an adult and do what everyone else was doing, to get on with life. I succeeded in everything possible in life – sports, school, boys, parties, alcohol, body image, the lot. I thought this was it and for nearly seven or eight years I never cried again. But that was it, I NEVER cried, not once, and I was very closed and unaffectionate. I never hugged people or felt comfortable when others hugged me. Instead I coped by partying very hard and working just as hard.
In my early 20’s I had a ‘quarter-life crisis’ – basically I had enough. I left my long-term relationship, took time off from my PhD, sold my house and moved. Within about a month I bumped into one man who was different. He was an accountant, and when I met him he hugged me. Later when I asked out of politeness how he was, he told me he was resting a lot, crying most evenings and getting used to a big change that had happened in his life. I was shocked that this stranger had honestly told me what was going on, and something so sensitive and personal. I knew in this moment that this guy was different. At the time I did not know that this man had been having Esoteric Healing and attending Universal Medicine courses for about 2-3 years.
At this point I was inspired to go deeper and look within. I was somewhat fearful of what I would find, and I cried and cried and cried for nearly 4-6 months. I cried about all the things in life that I did not understand, why others were also so unhappy underneath their smiles, why work seemed fake and no one wanted to do it, and why there was distance or separation in my family and friends even though we appeared to get along. I now realise the hurt that I felt deepest was that I felt this distance and separation in all of humanity – this still hurts now.
Seven years have now passed and I still often feel sad about how life seems around me, and I let myself cry. However, I now have some simple tools to deal with the deep hurts so they don’t get on top of me, but also so I don’t bury them down deep. I thank Universal Medicine for sharing with me these tools. For example, I now see that although life may not always feel very lovely, joyful or fun, I can connect to this lovely joy and fun on my inside (because I am this), and I don’t need the world to be this back to play with me. I understand that underneath another’s hardness they are lovely and playful just like me, but sometimes people reject this because of their own hurts about why others were not this lovely and joyful with them as a child.
So is life a set up? That we don’t get met in the loveliness we are as a child, because our parents have their own hurts, so we then feel hurt, bury our hurt and then can’t meet our own children for the loveliness that they are, and so on and so on. It felt like a set up for me until that accountant came along and met me from that loveliness that he chose for himself, so I had a moment to feel that I am still this. Yes, a complete stranger allowed me to open up and connect within, just because he had allowed himself to do the same. So someone must have done the same with him and someone before that person also, and so on and so on – the way life can truly be set up.
So I had my first profound healing and inner-connection at my accountant’s! Isn’t this saying something to how life is currently set up? It wasn’t any spiritual group, no church, no psychologist and not even in ten years of university. If there is any story to be told about the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, this is the true one. Serge is one of very few people I know who meet absolutely everyone equally from this lovely and amazing place, to another’s loveliness. He does this with absolute consistency and commitment to love for humanity, allowing people to feel they are the same. I thank him deeply for re-starting this cycle. I also thank my accountant who continues to do an amazing job with my tax with a warm and open heart.
By Anonymous
The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
When we are truly met we reconnect with our own inner being. Serge Benhayon is an inspiration and role model for us all to share the beauty of truly meeting ourselves and each other without judgement.
Yes I too remember how sad I felt when nobody wanted to play with me when I was a child. When I was older, I had my happy moments, but it was not until I met Serge Benhayon that true joy re-entered my life. Now at 60, my life is full of joy and playfulness which is my true essence.
It is so beautiful when we can let go of our protection and allow ourselves to be fully transparent and open with another and how healing this is to others and offers the space for a deeper connection.
This is the ripple effect that can change the whole world. We all remember one teacher, one person who truly connected with us, and how life-transforming this can be – and equally we have the potential to connect and open up to everyone we meet. If the world continues to operate from its seeming hurts, then we have a world guarded and protected, and in individualism – and this is what can be so devastating to feel if we too hold the same.
One person can inspire us to challenge our norm and see life in a new light. What is important to note is that we can all be sources of inspiration equally for each other and once we wise up to this fact just like domino’s this set-up of life can fall.
Sometimes it does indeed seem like life is a set-up – bringing either the allures of riches and success, or misery, struggle, poverty and drama – but that none of it is offering the opportunity to truly connect to ourselves and to be free to live from a place that feels true within. Thanks to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine we now have the tools to hold steady in the drivers seat – we may not be able to control what goes on around us, but we can have absolute mastery of how we are to live with it.
As we are all love inside it makes sense that everybody equally is able to express this love, to the best of their ability in the moment. And yes, it hurts that we as a society and humanity hold back to express who we truly are in such a big manner. I too did cry about it. Till I realized I can change something here. I can choose to learn again to express the love we all are and so make a difference. This will inspire others to discover their love again and maybe also to express again. Every one of us is needed. We need each other as reflection. To take this job, this responsibility is calling me out of the bed and brings purpose into my life. This is my new chosen set-up.
Wow, initially upon reading this I would say I had no idea that opening up in this way can profoundly support another to open up too, but then I know this is so from how open and honest others have been around me that have inspired me to connect and be honest about what’s really going on for myself. Yest reading this has shown how much of myself I keep guarded and protected still – whether that’s sharing how amazing I feel or those days I have which aren’t so much fun.
This is an amazing story – that shows life is perfectly designed to bring us back to who we are 🙂
“Although life may not always feel very lovely, joyful or fun, I can connect to this lovely joy and fun on my inside (because I am this), and I don’t need the world to be this back to play with me” – this is such a great point. I have often thought that the way I feel about myself and my life was all because of everything and everyone around me and how loveless they were, and that would leave me totally powerless as there would be nothing I could do to change. Knowing myself as an essence that cannot be touched has been the most life-changing realization.
This is a great testimony of how we are all practitioners no matter in what profession we work. The eye opening support your accountant offered to you is priceless and no psychologist would have brought you near this experience, which was simply to live with an open heart and in absolute transparency.
To say that something is not right in this world and to stop and say no more of this and not trudge on regardless is immense and a starting point for us all. As the way how we live is not and cannot be right when there is so much pressure, stress, overwhelm, hate, disease and so on which everybody is experiencing to a degree personally or indirectly on a daily basis. Your story shows how we can break through this cycle when we make life about connection and people, by simply sharing what is really going on instead of living in isolation towards another.
Wow I am so blessed to have discovered this blog today. I love the way you draw my attention to the true set up (divine design) and the false set up (most people call it ‘life’) that is designed to keep me entrapped in my hurts. Serge Benhayon consistently shows us what it means and how it looks and feels to align to what is true and I am intensely grateful for this incredible blessing that has changed me forever.
‘Yes, a complete stranger allowed me to open up and connect within, just because he had allowed himself to do the same.’ Isn’t it beautifully infectious when one person opens up, because we can’t help but let our guard down, even if it is only for a few seconds.
It is always a deeply saddening sight to bear witness to a child’s innocent joy and sparkle drop out of their body in a second, in reaction to a well-intentioned, protection-based parental rebuke, itself only a reaction to a hurt buried deep within the parent. A devastating rite of passage that quickly knocks the joy-full stuffing out of the next in line. If life is all a set up then isn’t the next question, ‘For what purpose?’ Why do we continually, unwittingly, but nonetheless collectively, arrive at a place where we’ve managed to put a stop to the joy we naturally are for each successive generation? What is truly going on here?
“So is life a set up? That we don’t get met in the loveliness we are as a child, because our parents have their own hurts, so we then feel hurt, bury our hurt and then can’t meet our own children for the loveliness that they are, and so on and so on.” So deep gratitude and appreciation for Serge Benhayon for standing up and showing us there is another way. When we are open and express how we truly feel with another, it gives them an opportunity to be real too. With the support of Universal Medicine practitioners I have been clearing my hurts – which feels amazing after – like you – so many years of sadness and crying.
The issue with the current construct of life is that it is built of systems that are designed to protect our hurts.
I remember a similar experience as a child. It was a feeling like my best friend was going away, a sad moment indeed.
My daughter is constant reflection of playfulness and I have to stop and remind myself that it is ok to play whilst working and completing a task. Otherwise I am simply perpetuating the same cycle and squashing her innate playfulness and loveliness! She is the perfect medicine for me in my daily life to remind me of my essence.
I find this too with my daughter’s. Although they are in their late teens and beyond, they are a constant reminder to me of the natural joy that is within us all, and that all I need to do is make the choice to connect to this.
Life can definitely feel like a set up when the rhythm of our true beat is missing from our steps and what has been replaced is an auto pilot mode of operandi. I love the fact that no matter what the flight path we may have been on the inner beat never stops but remains awaiting us to hear and feel once again.
At my first workshop with Serge Benhayon it didn’t take me long to realise that he was: “just reminding us of something we already know”. If was the most wonderful feeling of coming home; a feeling I had been waiting for, for a very long time.
Amazing to think that our hurts are like dominoes having a knock on effect on each other and keeping everyone in the same misery and pain. It only takes one person to rise above their hurts and actually put love and humanity first to start a love chain reaction which has the power to change the world.
I love that all these changes came about by someone basically being honest with you. How often do we say what we really feel? How often do we just say what we think the other person wants to hear, or do we even really consider the question and feel for ourselves the answer? Being honest opens up the opportunity to be aware and to change naturally.
So true Laura, expressing honesty in how we are feeling brings more awareness to ourselves and to those around us and change happens naturally.
I agree jacqmcfadden04 and Laura, I have experienced many times by expressing what I felt in the moment it was exactly what the other person needed to hear. This is also a great learning process for me, confirming that I can trust what I feel and express it.
I love what you share. Connecting to our own loveliness within, allows another to do the same – so beautiful!
The sadness you described I always covered my whole life… Now letting out what I truly feel and showing this, changed my life and my relationship with me. I am super playful and full of joy, but to escape the sadness that lies underneath (because of aspects you shared) is no solution for me anymore. Now my joy is even more pure and real, because I am ready to feel everything, all the time !
So it seems there are two set ups! One in which I am met, the other in which I am missed out. Obviously everyone wants to be met. No one really wants the other version. Yet most of us live the other version. Mmhh… Thank God I was provided with the tools to choose the version I truly want. And thanks to Serge Benhayon who presents them through Universal Medicine.
This is an incredible testament to the strength of taking the time to be the true us. We only need to see it once to feel there is another way, and this can be life changing, and so the cycle can continue.
It is amazing how healing we are, just like your accountant, when we can be open and real in our love with people.. no guards or pretence.
True Annie, It is all about being and sharing our true self and letting people in.
This highlighted for me that how we are and what we do has an impact on others…You never know when something you say to another might be exactly what they need to hear to open up a change.
What a fantastic blog, I related to so much of it. I really enjoyed this quote: “Yes, a complete stranger allowed me to open up and connect within, just because he had allowed himself to do the same. So someone must have done the same with him and someone before that person also, and so on and so on – the way life can truly be set up.” This is how change occurs, being willing to be open with another and sharing what we feel with another, just lovely – thank you.
I agree with you Samantha, this is how change occurs, not by being perfect and always saying the right thing, the high wisdom, but being willing to be open with one another and sharing what we feel, we let others in and they feel it, that can stay forever. In the same way that we felt that from someone else.
It is so beautiful to read how you took the opportunity offered by your accountant to open up and feel your hurts/pain and those of humanity and get beyond that to the true joy that is forever in our essence.
I love how the person who you felt your first profound moment with was with your accountant – and not in church, or a spiritual group, or at uni or a psychologist – this is definitely saying something about the way the world is!
Immensely so sweet and delicately written.