by Penny Scheenhouwer
In my early 20’s, I made a decision to change my lifestyle. I stopped drinking alcohol and smoking, I cut gluten, dairy, sugar and caffeine from my diet. I also ended a relationship after realising that my partner and I were just going through the motions. He was not interested in what I thought or felt about things and most of the time we spent together revolved around going out and partying. One day, I just decided that I would rather be on my own forever than settle for being with someone who was not really interested in being with me.
Why did I make these choices? My life seemed great. I was earning a lot of money for someone my age, had loads of friends, played sport and had a great social life (which was always about drinking). I also used to have mood swings, cry a lot, get angry for no reason and hated myself. I couldn’t reconcile the fact that I seemed to have what was deemed a great life yet, I felt otherwise on the inside. I decided that things were not working and something had to change. I didn’t really ‘know’ what I was doing but just went with what I felt to do. I started to feel much better about myself, more settled within myself, I had loads more energy and of course my skin looked great and I lost weight. I also started to like myself (wouldn’t go as far as love yet!).
When I made these changes I got some support from family and friends but mostly people got upset with me and gave me a hard time. The biggest issue for most people was that I chose not to drink alcohol. I was constantly pressured to have ‘just one’. As for the food, most people found it weird and a hassle to have me over for meals. A lot of people stopped asking me out. It didn’t take me long to cave into the pressure and go back to living the way I was before, to feel accepted and ok with others again. I have to say it also didn’t take me long to stop noticing how horrible I felt in my body, or that I was moody again and began to put on weight.
I met Serge Benhayon over 10 years ago after a friend recommended having a session with him. At this point in my life I was drinking heavily, smoking cigarettes and taking recreational drugs regularly. I was also married to a wonderful man. We had what we thought was a great relationship, yet most of the time we were drinking and taking drugs.
I remember that first session so clearly. Serge spoke to me about how much love I was amongst other things. That seemed foreign to me at the time but I couldn’t deny how I felt after the session with him. My husband also came that day and loved how he felt. We continued to see Serge for sessions regularly as we knew that the way we felt after a session was something that we didn’t feel normally in our life but wished we could.
Our life was hectic, stressful, we had money issues and of course we used alcohol and drugs to relieve the stress. All the time that we saw Serge, he knew that we drank, took drugs, etc and never once did he tell us to stop or tell us what food we should be eating. He continued to treat us with respect and love and supported us in our way to connect back to Love. It took us a few years, but we eventually made the decision ourselves to change these things. While we started to feel great in our bodies and life, others around us reacted. Having experienced this before, I knew that this was just a part of the process and continued doing what I felt was good for me. That was eight years ago now.
My husband and I are still together (more so, as our connection to ourselves and each other is based on love first) and we have an amazing life (though not perfect!). All those that reacted initially to our changes, now comment on how well we look, how healthy we are and how wonderful our relationship is. They notice that we don’t have a life filled with drama and that we are not exhausted. They ask us for support with their lives, never do we tell them what they should be doing. In fact, we hardly ever speak to them about how we live. We have many friends who are not esoteric students and have great relationships with all of our family members. They are all used to our way of living and respect it, and our choice to not drink alcohol or eat gluten and dairy is not an issue to them now.
Serge Benhayon, his family and Universal Medicine have inspired and encouraged myself and my husband to re-connect back to ourselves, to trust ourselves and trust that we already know what our bodies need and that we are already love. And we in turn, are now inspiring others by our daily living, showing them that they too can make choices for themselves, if and when they are ready.
The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
Whilst we all know what feels right in our own body we do not always adhere to this. The big question is why don’t we listen to the body and what is it that we get out of abusing ourselves because we definitely do get something out of it. What I have learned for myself is that when I do the right thing by myself it asks me to be more and more responsible and it is this responsibility that we run away from.
I was at a Universal Medicine event yesterday and I observed over a hundred people looking really well, joy full and very few over weight. They were all interacting with each other and enjoying the connection. I went to a conference recently and where I observed three quarters of the room being over weight, most looked very unwell and miserable. No one were really connecting to each other, rather sitting alone drinking coffee. The two gatherings were like chalk and cheese.
What a beautiful testimony of how developing a loving relationship with ourselves, living in connection to our love and truth within, is what truly guides us live our lives with far greater enrichment. This is what offers real inspiration, being met with a loving way of being that is naturally lived, representing the truth who we all are in essence.
The words that spring to me at this moment Penny is true commitment. Appreciating the movements made to strengthen your living foundation and trusting that everything you need is right there within you to support the changes is super inspirational. When we stop and observe the choices made without perfection, true healing starts to unfold. Thank you for sharing.
When I stopped drinking alcohol (which was a few years before coming across Universal Medicine) I too experienced the pressure from friends and family to ‘just have one drink’, and this is something I too have done to others for loving choices they have made which I am jealous of or find exposing. And this is the nub of it isn’t it? We trundle along in our relationships where we have unspoken rules and arrangements about how we behave and interact. If someone then ‘breaks’ the rules, the others will feel disturbed, disrupted, uncomfortable, exposed and instead of celebrating the one who has chosen to step off the numbing hamster-wheel and allow ourselves to be inspired, many, if not most of us instead feel anger, jealousy, rage even, and will do whatever we can to sabotage the loving choice of another so we don’t have to feel the lovelessness in our own choices. As soon as they are back playing within the rules of the game, we relax back into our comfortable arrangement. I’m pretty sure there aren’t many of us who would consciously choose to do this, so why do we unconsciously choose it? Could it be that we will go to any lengths to protect ourselves from being exposed in the irresponsibility we choose to live in?
What you share here is beautiful Penny, I can relate with this part and am choosing this too, ‘to re-connect back to ourselves, to trust ourselves and trust that we already know what our bodies need and that we are already love.’ Absolutely.
What is becoming clear to me is my response to another when they are in reaction to me and how the response is dictated by the choices I have made previously eg. when I am in the momentum of listening and honouring myself I am less likely to react but if I am rushing or listening to doubtful thoughts in my read then I am more likely to react. Developing a momentum where my choices are loving builds a foundation of love and the more steady the foundation is the less likely I am to harm myself by reacting.
I am noticing that the more loving a choice I make the more other people seem to react. i have also noticed that the way other people react seems related to my ability to appreciate and accept my own choices without apology. If I am steady in myself I am rarely questioned about my choices.
It’s crazy that when we make loving choices this can trigger so many people, sometimes the reflection is too much for them to handle and they feel exposed in their loveless choices even though you haven’t said a word or judged them in anyway it has rocked their comfort – in a good way.
One thing that has happened since starting to make choices from my heart and being solid and steady in those choices – some friends move away and even family members can go distant, and this was not the intention but simply to live more truly myself. It’s more a reflection of what perhaps those friendships were based on – something which was not true to begin with, but this doesn’t mean there is judgement or hardship.
I have also had the experience of changing many things in my life for the better (sometimes only temporarily) but still not feeling completely satisfied or settled. It was only when I started to connect to a love and stillness inside of me (with the support and inspiration of Serge Benhayon) that I realised that I am ok as I am, and then this sense of settlement or ease in my body was really there and then it became much easier and more permanent to make my life how I wanted it to be and feel.
“They are all used to our way of living and respect it, and our choice to not drink alcohol or eat gluten and dairy is not an issue to them now.” It makes such a difference in your relationships when you claim what is true for you.
It is fascinating that people give you a ‘hard time’ for giving UP alcohol and other harmful drugs… they should be giving us a hard time for taking them up in the first place and continuing to use them despite the in-your-face obvious ill-effects. We have it completely upside down.
I can relate to the knowing of what feels right but then not being able to live it. It is powerful and very confirming to meet someone like Serge Benhayon who simply lives his truth no matter what the world is living or saying otherwise. A true blessing, a reflection we so very much need in this world as it all helps us to build trust in ourselves again and to live what we know is true.
When there is a constant present of some crutch, whether it be drugs, alcohol, or huge consumption of food (amongst many other things) this must tell us something isn’t right. It surely must say: “there is something inside you are not wanting to feel or address”. For those who are willing to say “I want to be me, and I want to get rid of that crutch” – Serge Benhayon offers insights that are invaluable in supporting that change.
It can show how little our relationships with friends and family are based on love when they actually encourage others to drink alcohol and change their diet back to unhealthy ways, supposedly to be social and fit in. Love actually supports people where they are at and let’s them be – no imposition. Serge Benhayon is a great example of that love.
It is truly a conundrum how much people react when they see someone they know making healthy choices. The pull for them to do the same is very present and must feel super uncomfortable when they ignore it for old familiar unhealthy ways.
It is strange how much peer pressure there is to not make loving choices and not expose all that does not work in this life.
Thank you Penny for sharing. It is our life to choose how we lead, but if it’s not Love that we know and feel in our body, then it’s not the full us we are bringing anyway. This can sound a bit blithe or rather blunt but the more I honor this, the more I can see there is no substitute for truth: that is we are all made to live with stillness, appreciation, openness and grace – anything less is just a mirage.
Most people initially have an opinion about whether I drink or not, (why not?) or don’t have dairy or gluten ! When I express the fact that my body feels so much better without these things and the response I often get is about how difficult and limiting it must be for me to enjoy my food. I did miss some items of food when I chose not to have them anymore, but not for long!
I had a similar experience of uneasiness when I finished university. Everything looked rosy and sorted on the surface in terms of relationship, career, money, fitness, health etc but underneath it all I felt miserable and empty and not content at all. There was a deep unsettlement in my body that did not ease until I re-discovered my connection with my body and my inner heart and started living more truthfully according to how my body felt not what my mind was telling me was the norm.
This shows so clearly that it is not about pushing anybody into changing their life or tell them what to do but that we are all allowed to have our own rhythm and by letting each other live and living our own life to our own awareness we inspire each other and thus bring change to us all.
I love how so many people, inspired by Serge, choose to connect back to who they are and make choices in honour of that connection and how they feel… trusting their bodies to guide them in a way of living that is deeply supportive and transformational to the point it then inspires others to do the same as if love is contagious. Very cool.
Alcohol seems to be a peculiar addiction that has the power to generate the illusion that we are one (when we are under its influence). It also provides a great alibi, if anything goes wrong, alcohol is ythe one to be blamed for (the people choosing to drink it have not responsibility here). Only when one is out of this created reality, one realises that alcohol cannot really help to establish any real foundation for relationships, that the relationships created around it are empty and not true. The veil gets lifted.
Changing your lifestyle when you were younger shows you that you knew, like we all do. Beautiful to read how you connected back to the truth of your body when you felt the loving reflection that Serge Benhayon gave to you and your husband. And now you are a loving inspiration for your family and friends, your love for all is what they get and feel.
Standing strong is very helpful when you wobble so you can get up and be strong for another.
Good to see and realize where our choices bring us. I also made the experiences to choose alcohol and other ‘things’ like foods and entertainment to not become aware where I and the world was and how it feels. Now while I am ready with alcohol and many other ‘things’ (still not perfect and no pressure to become) I become more and more aware. My life did get better, but also more challenging. Or better said: I become more aware of the challenges and I am more free to make a choice again. To take responsibility again in full is a journey away from the ‘normal’ life of most of us and it feels like I am a pioneer – with all the ups and downs of this position. Thats my way.
Everything about this blog was enjoyable, at the risk of sounding like a sycophant it just made me want to meet you and your husband one day. You writing is so accessible, relatable, there is no trying to be anything but who you are. Thank you for taking the time to share your story with everyone.
It was only after I came to Universal Medicine that I realised that I had actually hardly ever made choices for myself even though I thought I was in charge of my life. Many choices were made in reaction to the world and people around me. What I have learnt is that I have to get to know myself in essence in order to make choices that are in alignment with the true me.
I like how you changed your life style because you could feel there was truth in it and then weren’t able to sustain it, it simply shows that we do not learn to support ourselves to live in a way that feels true to us and then we doubt ourselves instead.
Thank you for sharing your story, showing us that it isn’t about what’s coming from the outside. But that it is what’s coming from inside of us that matters.
Thank you Penny for sharing your journey back to you, trusting the love that your are to guide you along the way.
Penny you and your husband are simply the best role model ever to let people around you feel and see how beautiful it is to live the way of the livingness.
Our bodies really do know when enough is enough but we are experts at denying its messages. We do this at our own peril.
Hi Penny, I experience very similar reaction with family and friends when I initially changed my diet and lifestyle some 30 years ago. I found it so strange and very hard to handle the reaction of others but persisted for about 7 years without drugs or alcohol or dairy, or meat for that matter. I was a little radical though taking my family to the extremes of eating raw food and fasting. Because this change was in reaction to how I had been living previously it did not last as I soon swung back to coffee, alcohol, cigarettes, dope and dairy. When I saw how harmful smoking dope was watching my teenage children I gave that up. When my first granddaughter was born I gave up cigarettes. When my body could not handle even one glass of alcohol I gave that up. By the time I came to Universal Medicine I had already made significant changes in my life but the change that the presentations of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine inspired me to make of the greatest significance were on the emotional front. It was the emotional drama that had gone unchecked for a lifetime that needed addressing along with my lack of self worth and low self esteem. This was dealing with hurts in a whole new way; from a place of being love first. I realised that I had not previously really dealt with any of my hurts; I had only ever magnified them by pulling them out at the drop of a hat and then stashing them back in the body to build on the next time round!
Who would have thought the choice to not drink alcohol (which poisons your body), and cut out foods like gluten (that bloat you and and weigh you down) are such controversial decisions… it’s one of the many ways that human beings live that doesn’t make sense currently.
Thank you Penny for sharing, I love how you say you and your husband never felt judged by Serge Benhayon, I can also attest to this. Serge has always offered complete and unconditional love and never ever have I once felt judged by him, this in itself is something quite extraordinary as even when people say they don’t judge there is often an underlying tone, whist with Serge there never is. When we are given a space that is free of judgment we are being offered great healing.
I love how Serge treats us all with the same equalness without any judgment or comparison. He lives a simple true loving way of life and has inspired many to make different choices and live a life that is true for each of us.
Such an important point Rosanna, that everyone has their own timing and space in which to come to feel what’s right and what works for them. What I have found is that this path is always fast-tracked when I connect more deeply back to my own body, because it’s in this that I can feel truth. Serge Benhayon has been and continues to be, an amazing inspiration and role model in that regard.
As more people choose not to drink alcohol and listen to their bodies when choosing what to eat, the balance of ‘normal’ is gradually shifting. By law all food packaging now has to list ingredients so that it is clear what is included so that we can choose. The laws on drink driving and drug driving are becoming clearer and more accepted so that saying ‘no’ to alcohol causes less suspicion and ridicule. The law is catching up with what our bodies have been telling us.
Mary I agree, and the Gluten and Dairy free section in supermarkets is expanding as the demand is increasing, not because it’s trendy but because people are recognising the true health benefits cutting out gluten and dairy offer.
This thing about those around us disliking any decision to change our drinking habits is because it provides them with a reflection on their own choices and that can be uncomfortable as the realisation hits. That may then set off a fear in us of not fitting in, or worse of being ridiculed, even rejected and abandoned – and so we’ll often cave in. But your experience goes to prove that anyone can get used to anything – it just takes time on their part and conviction, commitment and self worth during the layer of turbulence on yours.
I love the power of your honesty expressed here Penny. Making changes in our lives starts with us and the choice to bring responsibility back to the forefront. That is hugely healing and much too appreciate. Thank you.
Is it possible for one man to change the world? As we can see and experience ourselves the answer is yes.
Serge Benhayon shows us what one true man can do just by being love all of the time.
Living how you are without reservation and without preaching inspires people. No need to offer advice however only given when called/asked for. This is true support and giving people the space to develop in their own time.
What an inspiration Penny! Your sharing of your journey to where you are now is clearly your own choice, no pressure from anyone else, just listening honestly to your inner most. It is great to hear your family and friends accept your decisions to change your life for the better and that you have your Husband who joins you in your amazing changes!
“Serge Benhayon, his family and Universal Medicine have inspired and encouraged myself and my husband to re-connect back to ourselves, to trust ourselves and trust that we already know what our bodies need and that we are already love. And we in turn, are now inspiring others by our daily living, showing them that they too can make choices for themselves, if and when they are ready.” I love this final paragraph Penny, especially the line ‘when they are ready’. I too have been learning this , as when I first came to Universal Medicine presentations I was so enthusiastic to have found a way that spoke to me with true integrity I became preachy – and of course that went down like a lead balloon! Now I have more understanding – of myself and others – people notice the changes and now ask questions – if they want to know more. And if they don’t, that’s fine too nowadays.
Well said Benkt. It stands to reason why we need to get to the point where other peoples opinions don’t matter to us any more.
With self-acceptance, we no longer will need to “to feel accepted and ok with others.”
With appreciation we can strengthen our self-acceptance of ourselves, others and the world we live in.
Penny, all I feel when I read your blog is the love you are and the love you have for people.
Very true and clear said, it is important for each person to feel what is true and express that and so offers others that truth than too.
This is so important Penny, what you have chosen , your way, is the way that serves you. Whatever friend that is yours will allow that no matter what. This shows who true friends are. Friends are not about comfort or comforting , but who are you offering you the pull to forever sing (live) higher than ever before. To continue your way , in a world were many do not, it takes true strength and love to stay and trust your way, but this is what we are all capable of.
Beautifully put Fiona. others can be so unsupportive as it brings up jealousy in them.
They secretly wish they could do it.
lt takes a lot of strength and absoluteness to turn your unhealthy habits around and make them more self loving choices but when you finally do the rewards are worth every moment to of initial struggle. l need to remember this.
Thank you for sharing.
Penny beautiful how your friends have come full circle and how they respect the choices that you have made.
Yes, there will be those that drop away but the ones that really count and truly care are usually those that come full circle and support us all along.
Very true, Angela’s comment is also a great expansion. If we look at smoking it is a great example. Smokers all know what they are doing is harmful to their lungs, there is an honesty there but when they try to give up the relationship changes and the hanging out no longer happens. Relationship groups change as the abusive behaviour no longer becomes a choice.
Ha ha yes! Initially I think it irritates others that ‘we mess up the status quo’. Why do you have to change bread after all this time?! (You can substitute bed time, face creams, exercise routines, whatever you want really). On the whole I can attest to being like most others I have met… There are 2 things that are very confronting; change and responsibility particularly personal responsibility. We need to be the change we want to see in our lives,indeed in the world; it is actually the most empowering opportunity.
A lovely confirming read Penny. How interesting that so many of your friends struggled when you chose not to drink alcohol. There are some people who have not had an experience of what is is like to be social without drinking alcohol. I didn’t realize this till I stopped drinking. Hopefully over time they get to see how amazing it is to socialize, enjoy good company and feel amazingly bright and focused the next day!!
It can be very uncomfortable for friends and family when we make the choice to give up alcohol, as deep down they have to feel and reflect on their own choices.
I find it beautiful that you have lots of friends besides your esoteric student friendships and that your relationships have a loving quality irrespective of wether they are connected to Universal Medicine or not. I experience the same in my life.
How odd would it be to only have friends who did the same things as you, it is like only ever looking at 1 colour! Life would be so one dimensional. We all have different experiences to bring to one another, that colour comes from sharing and learning with and from each other.
It is a very strong and insidious force that beckons you back once you stop consuming something that is not of your true nature. I too have experienced this and its like the ‘group’ know you are pulling away and are there offering you more than ever to entice you back into the fold. When one is awakened from the stupors of what is not truly who are, they liberate themselves onto the path back home – inspiring a light for all others.
I agree Suse, there is what i would call a dis-association from the body to feel the honesty of what the body is sharing as opposed to the make believe persona from the head. I see this increasing even more so through the use of social media as a playground to present a picture but not to share what is truly going on.
It is interesting how making choices to sell care and result in others feeling uncomfortable, I did not consider this when I decided to look at my diet and connect more to my body and that my choices would be at times provoking for others to witness. Simply it offers a different view and challenges what many of of us consider ‘normal’. Something else I had not considered was true benefits of beginning to refine my diet to support me more, I have the practical increased vitality and steadiness, but also this deepening connection with my inner essence, what I am truly made which has been staggeringly beautiful to experience.
You make some great points here Penny. One of the things that I have really appreciated about Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine is that everyone is free to make their own choices. There are no set rules or criteria for people to abide by and no one is policing others: we are all working out for ourselves what feels right and making changes (or not) in our own time. It can be hard for others around us to understand why we make the choices we do, but over times, the benefits can’t be denied.
Penny an honest sharing, and lovely to hear how you transformed your life by choosing to simply love yourself and say no to self abuse and harmful substances. The journey back to our true selves can be lonely, especially when our new choices are misunderstood or ridiculed by family and friends. We gain so much more, by choosing to stand firmly in love,and when we do loneliness diminishes as we reclaim and live life our way. With time, and as you have found, we earn a new found respect from those that once judged or criticised. They can see and feel for themselves the amazing effect our choices have had on health, energy and relationships.
The level of acceptance, allowing and understanding Serge Benhayon has for each human being is beyond words. Never judging our choices but constantly, 24/7, offering us the choice of love by reflecting this.
I also experienced that people turned away from me and commented on how boring it is to not go out and party, drinking alcohol and taking recreational drugs and for sure it is an uncomfortable reflection to them, but we also have to take into consideration that we did not live our true self and that we basically role played another person and that people related to this person and not the true one. So when I changed and started to live from what I truly felt i was not the person anymore they knew and they had decided to relate to before. This is just a reflection of how far removed from our true selves we lived and how empty our relationships were.
Thanks Dragana, I can attest to this as I’m sure many if not all can. Peer pressure and changing ourselves to fit in is a very big part of growing up (as it currently is). It is good to remember this because it brings back awareness of things that I just wanted to shut out and didn’t want to feel, like the attack that came from not following the trend, but I was just being what is naturally me. Peer pressure is even rife at University and this time its more subtle because everyone is developed in their intellectual capacity. I strive to be aware all the time of the peer pressure that controls humanity. It obviously isn’t working just by taking one look and from personal experience it hurts a lot to succumb to peer pressure, so I would never choose again.
Well said Rachel
Very Good Observation Danna, thanks for sharing 😀
LOVE it Penny. Thanks for sharing how when you were in your 20’s you naturally felt to give up caffeine, sugar, dairy etc.. There are a lot of things in life which do not make sense, and when I chose to not have food like Gluten and dairy I felt so amazing. It made me wonder, why did I not ask the question earlier? Why was i so fixated on what I want in life but not prepared to listen to actually truth and symptoms that I was experiencing, let along the peer pressure that is massive in high school.
I love this story Penny. It just goes to show, that when we allow others to support us to be who we truly are, great things start to happen.
Yes I feel it is so important to surround ourselves with inspiring people like this.
This is a sweet story, the fact that you both went to see Serge together is very warming. Often one partner may sit on the fence and be challenged by the idea of Serge for sometime. Usual the men from my experience and then when they meet him 98% of the time they absolutely fall in love with him too.
The fact that your husband wanted true self love and wanted to reevaluate his life just as you did is super romantic. Your friends and family all coming around to accept who you both are and how you live is testament to how you would interact with them and sounds like you always meet them as equal no matter what their life style choices.
It is amazing how others around us can react to changes we make in our lives. Change is difficult for many, and making choices based purely on love can be challenging when we are so used to accepting abusive behaviour as our ‘norm’. It’s so true that when we have a strong inner connection, making loving choices becomes so much easier and we are less likely to be affected by those around us that find it hard to accept.
I have indulged in fear of change and it has played havoc with, much delay, in my life. We cannot evolve without loving and encouraging the consistency of change in our lives.
What I found interesting here Penny is that when you and your husband made the changes in your life from a foundation of love first, it caused less reaction in those around than when you had previously changed your lifestyle, and also with you being so solid in your choices makes you less likely to be concerned about how others may react. I find this very inspiring.
I’ve read this a couple of times now and I always find it rather inspiring. Because you’re just doing what feels good and base your life from that. It’s interesting how people feel threatened when others start making good self loving choices for themselves…
I have had lots of reactions from people for not drinking alcohol. Some people just don´t want to go out with me because not drinking is not fun for their way of life. It is sad, but at the same time if they value alcohol more than relationship, what can I do?
That’s the way it is done, isn’t it Penny? Our change inspires others and on and on. For quite a long time after I stopped drinking I also stopped socialising, now I am enjoying initiating and nurturing many friendships.
You are so right Fiona. It is absolutely true. We are aiming to live more healthy and happy, but we often don’t appreciate it or welcome the answers with open arms. This to me then highlights that our resistance is only strong at the beginning stages, because we have given the opposite of health and true harmony a role in our life. We need to claim what is true & what we truly want in life, in order to break this stubborn pattern and possibly arrogance that ‘we all got it’.
Lets drop the self-defense and let go off all our old ways (that are keeping us away from truth). Let’s get real here.
Yes Danna l feel it as the comfort of arrogance.
What a revelation… Knowing you and your husband today and seeing your before and after photos, you have made changes for the better – absolutely! If this has all come through inspiration then it’s worth it for people to check out Serge Benhayon and see how he lives. I know my life has totally changed and is so awesome today!
I love how you share that in your early 20’s you chose to stop alcohol, gluten and dairy of your own accord and felt so much better. So many people report huge improvements in their health and vitality when they remove these foods that don’t feel good in our bodies (nobody can pretend that they feel vital after a night out drinking!) Yet society, including loving friends and family members, often do not support these beneficial changes – is it because they may have to look at what they are eating and drinking and may have to take responsibility for their choices in life?
Thanks Carmin. Often people react to other people when they are presented with someone making a different choice and it is an offering for them to see something different. And because we are so used to what is normal and have believed that we have to follow what is normal by societies standards, we are shocked to see someone who is ‘abnormal’. But someone making a choice for their health, diagnosed by themselves and truly felt and honoured by them should be normal and it is very disempowering to say otherwise so or that we need science to prove things before we do them. If it is true and is harmonious in a true sense then lets embrace whatever that is I say!
Gorgeous sharing Penny, I too loved how I felt after a healing session or course and wanted more of that in my life. Once you feel the love inside you can’t turn your back on it, as much as we may try to fit in with others it just doesn’t cut it. To feel the love and live to support that feeling becomes at some point more important than what other people think. I am just at the stage where I now aren’t willing to hide how amazing I actually feel compared to where I was 10 years ago, and I am not perfect or joyous everyday – but I know people who are living with joy and harmony in every moment and thats what I am allowing and developing. It’s awesome.
This is a very inspiring story you share Penny I love how it is now for you that “we in turn, are now inspiring others by our daily living, showing them that they too can make choices for themselves, if and when they are ready.” As what you have expressed here is that you hold no push in you to have others to be like you, instead what I feel is the acceptance of others for where they are at, while equally holding them in the same love you hold yourself. Just beautiful.
Thank you Penny for sharing how you knew in your 20’s the changes you needed to make in your life but were unable to sustain them because of the pressure you were put under to ‘conform to the norm’. It is inspiring to hear how you and your husband have transformed your lives and the positive impact that this has had on your relationship with each other but also with those around you.
That is true inspiration Penny, you changed the way that you live to what you feel to do, and not because anyone has told you to. It’s interesting how you already made the same choices years ago – you already felt the truth in that way of living!
Agree Melissa, it’s very lovely to build a trust in ourselves and let that be our first go-to for advice.
It’s really interesting that when someone starts to make positive choices that others get angry with them, or want them to go back to old ways and will even hassle them to go back to old ways. This is most often at the difficult point of breaking an old habit, in the early days where the patterns and cravings are being stopped. It doesn’t just come from people around us, but also from society, with ads on television, in newspapers, and when we walk down the street past cafés and restaurants, or even through the supermarket. There’s this constant bombardment with advertising and visual stimulation to consume alcohol, caffeinated drinks and foods high in sugar and fat. It’s no wonder that as a society there are so many problems with obesity, food addiction and excessive alcohol consumption. I don’t feel the health care system and, in general, society, are really understanding the impact of all of these products, not only on our physical health, but mostly our mental health. I’m so grateful for the inspiration from Serge Benhayon to begin to feel my body and feel what it really wants, then develop the self love to actually make the choice to take care of my body.
I agree Rosanna, I’ve only more recently realised how important it truly is to be exactly myself and do things exactly as I feel and when, never copy anyone else, because we all bring something different that adds to a bigger whole.
Thanks for sharing Penny. I love the way Serge Benhayon operates, he just lives a deeply loving way and shares that love with everyone he meets equally and consistently. That naturally inspires us to develop that in ourselves.
Yes I love that too katechorley, it is really inspiring how Serge Benhayon never tells anyone what to do.
Very powerful Penny, thank-you for sharing so honestly… The strongest impression I am left with from your blog, is of the ‘heart cranking open’ – bit by bit, accepting that greatness of love that Serge Benhayon spoke of in your first session.
This brings home to me so much of what I have also heard from Serge’s presentations, and that is, that it is ‘all there within us’…
How deeply we can resist this great love, do our darnedest to deny its existence, and yet, how profoundly our lives can change when we commit to the way of ‘re-opening’ our hearts, ‘cranking open’ those forgotten hanger doors… What astounds me to this day, is how amazing it feels, even to allow the smallest opening, allowed by letting go of what has hurt in life that had left the doors well and truly shut.
We are indeed so much more than we would, by and large, want to give ourselves credit for, so much more…
I love the way you describe the doors to our protected hearts as “‘cranking open’ those forgotten hanger doors”, that just hints at the enormous love that has sat there, waiting to be restored into our lives.
Exactly Rosanna. And how it is the shared experience of so very many people, particularly since coming to the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, that those old, neglected ‘hanger doors’ over our hearts have indeed been ‘cranking open’ – most definitely so! The love that awaits is at once profound and amazingly powerful, and then so very natural.
Experiencing this, it becomes such a crazy notion that we would ever have constructed barriers to this love. Holding onto such hurt most surely is something we needn’t feel enchained to.
Yes Victoria, it astounds me too at how amazing it feels to open up, let go of what has hurt and embrace love again. Letting people in is a big part of that for me.
Beautifully Said Victoria! ❤
Now this is more than a ‘good news story’! This is something worth celebrating day in day out, (by the feel of it you already are) truly inspiring Penny.
Thanks for sharing your beautiful story Penny. It’s inspiring to read about the connection ( to the love you naturally are) you and your husband felt after your first session with Serge Benhayon, and the commitment you both had to continue with the sessions eventhough it caused a reaction with those around you. The amazing thing is that you both provide such a beautiful reflection to them all now.
Such a beautiful sharing with us all Penny – thank you. So often I find when others including family and friends know that you do not drink or eat certain foods how many like to tempt you – ‘Go on just one won’t hurt’ they say! They then either go to one extreme of hiding away when consuming their chosen drink/food or exaggerate their choices in front of me. The one thing I am not doing is judging them – their choice. Underneath I know that they can feel all their choices in their body. So can I.
Such a great sharing here with us all Penny – the point when you mention the pressure of others/friends trying to ‘tempt you away’ from your way of eating or not drinking alcohol I can so relate too. Overtime the more I supported myself and the benefits felt in my body I became less easily persuaded and know that others could feel this too.
The fact that one day while you were having a great life (seemingly so from the outside) but nonetheless you decided to put a stop to it, carries an enormous weight. Recognising that one is not settled in the body and say no to it is something that not everybody is capable of doing and yet, amazingly, is something very easily reacted against. This is a marker you never forget and at some point returns to.
It’s true emfeldman. Often it is a crisis in life that has us looking to make changes but for me all seemed well, in fact fantastic to most. It was of course a crisis within myself and how I felt about myself and life, and for me this was a way I could no longer live. The rest is history as they say, for today I live a life that is full of so much love and playfulness and my relationships with everyone, including the friends I partied with back then, are more open and loving than ever before.
We don’t need to talk about what we do differently, just living the love reflects so much to others, that eventually they can ‘t but align in the future, whenever humanity is ready.
Absolutely Steffi ‘just living the love reflects so much to others’. Reflection is so powerful and then when people want to know more they will naturally ask.
This was really beautiful to read Penny. A life of tears and mood swings to inspiring others by the way you live is an incredible transformation. This vast contrast is something I too can appreciate since being inspired by my sessions with Serge Benhayon and the unwavering love and support he offered me. I look back only wishing that I had chosen to connect to the love within myself much sooner rather than hide in a life of recreational escape to hide the misery I was in. Thank you for reminding me how deeply appreciative I am to Serge and the choices I have since made for myself.
A walk down memory lane. Those changes and the Love that Penny and I have now almost 3 years on from when this was written has been ever increasing. We have become the walking proof that there is a different way.
It’s true Mick. Choosing to live the truth of who we are has meant that our relationship continues to deepen and that the love that we have does not have an end point but is always asking us to be more individually and together.
Beautifully expressed Mick, you two are walking proof that there is another way; a way of life that’s built on a true foundation of love. Thank you for sharing; you and Penny are so beautiful.
Penny, I love that you knew in your 20’s what you needed to do to support you. It doesn’t matter that you went back on that, because frankly the world wasn’t ready to support you with those choices, so it would have been extremely hard to keep that up on your own. Even more amazing is that you came across Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine later in life to revisit what you already knew… this time packaged with the support you needed.
Wonderful Penny that is a great story thank you so much for writing this amazing blog. I made the same experience like you – that it is sometimes hard for people around me if I change. For me that is normal because the people around me then cannot stay in their comfort anymore.
Wow Penny – you have come so far – we all have – after reading your story I am in deep appreciation for all UniMed and Serge Benhayon has offered us and very inspired to feel that this is now what we offer all others in life too. Thank you.
I agree Gemma. What has and is continually being reflected by and offered to everyone by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine is the opportunity to know who we truly are and that a life lived based on love is in fact our natural way of being. As you say we now offer this same reflection to others by simply being all of who we are in our every day.
Penny I also found that “The biggest issue for most people was that I chose not to drink alcohol”. It definitely takes really knowing who you are and sticking with what feels right for you no matter what the outside pressures are. What helps me is to realize that the pressure comes from people who are uncomfortable with seeing someone make a healthy choice that they know they are not making for themselves (while secretly wishing they were), and wanting everyone else to drink alcohol too so they can feel comfortable. Which means they do know the truth! And therefore the most loving and supportive thing to do, not only for ourselves, but for them also, is to keep showing that truth by sticking to our healthy choices. And you did it! Thanks for sharing your inspiring story.
Hi Penny, beautiful to read how you have transformed your life, through the choices you have made, having been inspired and supported by Serge Benhayon.
Your title “Choosing To Live My Life, My Way” is the answer. Adding “with Love”. Thank you for sharing how you did just that – by choosing love in your life.
Thank you for sharing, Penny, that un-common fact of what pressure we are put under when we take that so important step of making a better choice… to trust that choice completely. Trust ourselves that we can constantly and consistently make as many choices as we feel to – really go for it – and trust each choice that is made for, and from, the body, and not from pre-conceived ideals of “what is the best or right thing to do”. Learning and experiencing feeling great, not needing another or anything to fit in, what feels right and committing in full…
Thanks Penny, I have enjoyed reading this blog and how you and your husband have transformed your lives by choosing to reconnect to that love within us all and how we can offer to others a true refection of who they are.
Having come from the same I can very much relate to the lifestyle you had Penny. Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine have indeed supported you, me and thousands of others to eliminate such self destructive habits with absolutely no imposition… Instead allowing us the grace to unfold, come to and feel the truth for ourselves before finally making the self-loving choices to eliminate such harmful habits.
What an inspiring blog, thanks Penny. I love that in your early 20’s your body knew what it needed.
Penny I love how you describe that the changes you’ve made have been your choice but lovingly supported by sessions with Serge Benhayon. For me this is one of the key points of difference to Universal Medicine and the esoteric modalities, they are not needed to keep feeling better because you are supported to connect to the love that is naturally inside and so life simply becomes more enjoyable, symptoms fade away as does the weight, and the unloving choices that were easily made.
A very gentle way of changing habits with love and support, without judgement or pressure. That is why you can say you can support others to do the same “if and when they are ready”.
I enjoyed reading how you and your husband recognised this feeling you had after your sessions with Serge Benhayon, a feeling that you did not otherwise have in your life but wished you could. And then how later on this feeling has become normal to you, proving the fact that we make the changes and ultimately live the lives our choices create.
This is a great story, Penny. It can be all too easy to impose our ways onto others. You show how much more powerful it is just to be there for family and friends, with no imposition. It is also a testament to how you changed your life over time and slowly worked out what was working for you in your life and what wasn’t. It certainly makes me feel more patient and understanding with myself.
Great story Penny – I have also made many changes in my life without necessarily being focussed on giving up anything in particular. The focus was on coming back to love which is so simple, anything that does not support this eventually stands out and is not needed anymore. So rather than feeling like I am giving up anything there is more and more love in my world.
So very true what you say here Nicole, The focus was on coming back to love which is so simple, anything that does not support this eventually stands out and is not needed anymore. I have found this also, that with choosing more love for myself, your body just naturally tells you, this is not needed anymore. Love certainly gives you an okayness around anything that you choose to let go of, and as you say, there is more and more love to be had, as a result.
Wow, awesome Penny. I can really relate to the mood swings, crying, getting angry for no reason and hating myself then having all that change when I too made most of the choices you have depicted above… But I really like how you have shared what your like with others. I’m always like ‘hey you should try this and this and this and that’ which I realise isn’t the best thing to do. It’s quite pushy actually.
Thank you Penny – I loved reading this. Practitioners associated with Universal Medicine are the most unimposing practitioners I have ever come across and I have seen many! Reading this I was reminded of the way you supported me to make my own choices to stop drinking, smoking and partying with the same grace and acceptance you describe experiencing with Serge Benhayon. It is awesome to feel.
It was very familiar reading that you made all the changes once, really changing the way you were living… but that it did not stick because the underlying issues were still there, and once you caved in to the peer pressure you slowly slipped back into what is seen as normal.
The benefit of Universal Medicine is that there is the support, from Serge Benhayon, from the Universal Medicine Practitioners, and from a wider student community to bring those issues to our attention, to help us, to inspire us and to point out when we take a backward step. It is that support that truly helps us develop
Yes Simon this was the missing ingredient for me originally. Understanding that true change comes from addressing the underlying issue was the key. Also the ongoing support you talk of, from Serge Benhayon, Universal Medicine and the incredible community that we, are has allowed me to know that no matter where I am at or what is going on I will always be supported to connect back to the truth of who I am.
I just love reading about people being their own scientist, first by being honest with where they are at (regardless of what the “picture” looks like) and then the courage to make true and lasting changes, step by step – all the while keeping the “scientific honesty” of where they are at and where to next. Thank you Penny
I too chose to stop drinking alcohol many years ago. Even this Christmas I still got offered a drink from someone who knows very well I don’t drink. The pressure from society is very strong, but never stronger than my choice to honour me and what I feel.
I have enjoyed reading how your choices have brought such huge changes to you and your family; in fact, everyone you come in to contact with. Having met you personally, I am inspired by you and your husband. You are filled with such joy!
It is crazy how we cave into peer pressure despite how we feel when we do conform. But this blog is a great example and inspiring of how choosing to live in our own personal way is far more supportive than going with the crowd.
I had the same thought – why do we all conform to the trends and what is around us rather than choosing our own lives? This is a perfect example of the benefits of following your own heart and choosing a different way to live.
It is great reading about how you’ve claimed to live your life in the way you know is true for you. From regularly using alcohol and drugs myself when I made the decision to stop it was very uncomfortable for many friends at the time. Looking back, it was such a big part of life and any interaction I had with people – it just became normal. With the inspiration of Universal Medicine what I consider normal has most certainly changed back to being far more loving and caring of myself.
I love Penny, how you have described your relationships with your family and friends.
This is beautiful Penny, I can relate to a lot of what you say. Alcohol and drugs has played a big role within my family and I know how destructive it can be to the lives of the taker and the family members. It’s great to read that you and your husband have found your way back and live a much fuller life, without the need of the drugs and alcohol.