by Kate Maroney, Melbourne, Australia
For the first time in more years than I can remember, I feel like I am free to choose the life that I want.
Up until recently, I had a problem with sugar. It wouldn’t be exaggerating to say that I was addicted to sugar. I was preoccupied throughout the day with when and how I was next going to be able to eat chocolate, cake, biscuits etc. If I wasn’t thinking about when I would next be able to eat one of these things, I was preoccupied with how much I hated the cycle that I was in. Every time I ate something containing sugar I told myself it would be the last time. That this one would ‘fill up’ the emptiness that I sought relief from and I could move on… but each chocolate, biscuit or cake I ate only made me want more… and more… and more. I actually can’t remember when this cycle started, but it went on for at least 12 years.
I had tried many times before to ‘give up’ sugar but here is how I finally did it…
With some help from Serge Benhayon and some other amazing people I began to examine why sugar was such an integral part of getting through each day. I came to realise that I was using sugar to try and distract myself from feeling that I wasn’t ‘ok’. Up until that point, I hadn’t felt that I really was ‘ok’. It took some time for me to really feel that not only was I ‘ok’, but so much more than that again.
I discovered that the essence of me is truly amazing, but the way that I had been living for so many years (without caring for myself properly) did not confirm that the incredible light I felt inside me could truly be the essence of me. I remember someone summing it up beautifully for me…. they said that I was seeking sugar because I was ‘missing the sweetness of Kate’. Finding my own sweetness opened up the possibility to not need sugar to enjoy my day, because within me was all the sweetness and beauty I needed.
Once I started believing that I, as well as my body, was worth nurturing, I was able to start choosing to not eat a substance that was harming me. I also started supporting myself in other ways so that I was more readily able to say ‘no’ at the times when I most wanted sugar. I started looking at all the things that were leading to my being exhausted during the day, such as going to bed late and frenetically rushing from one thing to another throughout the day. I also started nurturing my body by doing things gently and with grace – rather than stumbling and clunking through daily tasks.
Now, I don’t even want sugar. People can be eating it all around me and I am not remotely moved to have any myself. My body generally vacillated between feeling buzzy and dull when I was eating sugar, whereas now my body feels a lightness and a stillness that I rarely experienced then.
A ‘bonus’ to my choice to give up sugar is that I now feel an incredible potential within myself. My problem with sugar was the most formidable thing in my life. There are so many basic things that I felt were out of my control because of the lack of control I perceived I had over my ability to not eat sugar. Since giving up sugar, I feel for the first time like I am piloting my own star ship (or plane if aviation is more your thing than space travel), and I really can choose for myself the life that I want to live.
The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
Our inner sweetness shines through when we take the fake sugar sweetness away.
A beautiful realisation that we crave sugar in order to not be aware of how amazing we are.
When we begin to connect to our inner-most essence, it reveals of just how much we have allowed ourselves to dishonour our worth, our exquisite delicateness and instead be self-abusive and unlovingly treat ourselves. There is no greater reward in this world than to be our true selves, as the sweetness it delivers is out of this world.
Absolutely awesome healing Kate, where you start to feel more yummy inside, because you no longer have to replace your lack of acceptance of your sweetness with outside sweets (sugars)! Gorgeous!
Go for it Kate, ‘Since giving up sugar, I feel for the first time like I am piloting my own star ship (or plane if aviation is more your thing than space travel), and I really can choose for myself the life that I want to live.’ Gorgeous.
A lovely sweet and inspiring blog showing the importance of seeing why the addiction is there, what is behind it.
We could say our freedom is to choose to have sugary snacks when we want to and that that is awesome, but as you say it can feel very much like being trapped and not being in control at all. The ultimate freedom is to be able to choose to not have the sugar without having to fight a need. I found too that this is only possible when we feel how divine we are ourselves. No sugar can ever match the feeling of how divine I am.
I love this blog Kate. When we feel ruled by our addictions it makes it really hard to trust ourselves. When we address the root cause of our cravings and desires we are truly free.
“I remember someone summing it up beautifully for me…. they said that I was seeking sugar because I was ‘missing the sweetness of Kate’.” Such a revelation to read this Kate. I have a similar formidable issue with macadamia nuts. They are used to numb my innate awareness aka sensitivity. I shall embrace next time (tomorrow) that feeling rebirths itself .. because it is me who will be on offer if I do. Sounds fantastic!!
A few years ago I could only dream of a time when I was not hooked on sugar. My journey was similar in that in it was only when I started to look at the underlying issues as to why I was needing sugar – thanks to the presentations of Universal Medicine – that I too have left sugar behind and no longer have any desire to eat it. That’s pretty amazing.
This is a very loving approach to let go of things that do not support us but we have a hart time letting them go. Instead of forcing yourself you allowed yourself to look ‘behind’ the sugar, to look at why you needed the sugar to then being able to lovingly build a relationship with yourself in that area of need to close the gap so that no sugar is needed anymore. Beautiful, thank you Kate.
Thank you so much for writing this blog Kate. I am going through my own process of letting go of sugar and other foods that are not supportive for my body. Your post reminds me that I have a responsibility to connect to my own loveliness and live it.
Beautiful blog Kate and I relate all too well as I am addicted to sugar. Sometimes I feel the worst consequence of this addiction is the way it results in self doubt as I cannot trust my thoughts once I eat it.
A very powerful point Leonne – it is so true. You highlight just how important our connection to our bodies indeed are. As regardless of what our influenced minds are telling us, the truth remains absolute within our bodies.
It is amazing that you realised the harm that sugar was causing and what it was denying you… and through recognizing you are worth nurturing, you found a way to say no and embraced the sweetness you already possessed…. allowing you to then live the life you always wanted. If this is what is possible for one person, I can only imagine the potential of people as a whole in a sugar free world.
That’s the tricky thing with sugar, you can’t feel your potential while you are under the influence and high of its after effect.
It is great to read this story, and feel that there is always a cause of our behaviour. It is only up to us and be honest, and let ourself feel the truth of who we are beneath all that we used to ‘substitute’ it.
Thanks for sharing this story Kate, I used to pride myself on not eating sugar and would boast about the amount of years I had gone without it, but on recent reflection I was eating huge amount of sugar in the form of fruit. I was eating really sweet stuff too like bananas, grapes and dates and I would label this as ok because it wasn’t a refined sugar, but this had the same effect on my body as sugar had. I would go racy and numb because of eating these foods. Now things have really shifted once I got a lot more honest about what this was doing to my body. Its not perfect and at times I still eat things that I know are too sweet for me but the difference is now I know that there is always something going on beneath the surface when I’m looking for the sweet foods.
Thanks Kate, great sharing . . . just goes to show that true freedom comes from taking responsibility.
“I came to realise that I was using sugar to try and distract myself from feeling that I wasn’t ‘ok’.” That is really an important insight for all people suffering of sugar addiction. So it is only a choice to allow oneself to feel the love and beauty which lay inside in each of us. The sugar industry will not love this insight at all!
Looking at and addressing the underlying causes of our addictions in whatever form they are is the only way to truly heal them.
This is great Kate, the need for sugar is very recognisable. I can feel that sugar is a deep distraction from feeling the stillness that is within, and this stillness within for me equals the sweetness that is there.
The thing about sugar is that we can reach out for it for comfort or solace but has a detrimental effect on the body and can lead to increased moodiness. This can add to the cycle of reaching for it more and more – we eat sugar in an attempt to solve a problem, but end up with many more.
I like how finding your own sweetness has left you with no desire whatsoever to seek this sweetness from outside. The more we stand in our fullness (sweetness) the less we need anything from the outside to fill us up.
Sugar is undeniably an addictive substance and I used to justify my addiction with ‘I have a sweet tooth’ – a statement that my teeth did not agree with! When we learn to appreciate our natural innate sweetness then the craving to replace it with artificial sweeteners is no longer there.
“Once I started believing that I, as well as my body, was worth nurturing, I was able to start choosing to not eat a substance that was harming me. I also started supporting myself in other ways so that I was more readily able to say ‘no’ at the times when I most wanted sugar.” Great sharing Kate – thankyou.
You present an undeniable truth here about the role sugar plays in many people’s lives – that cycle of addiction followed swiftly after the sucrose crash by self-loathing – and how it takes a choice to hold ourselves as more worthy of nurturing to begin to break that cycle and start to make more loving choices that respect and honour the body.
So good to be reminded from time to time how far one has come. Thank you Kate for taking action and for getting to the bottom of the sugar addiction. You did this representatively for us all and this power still holds us specially during these sugar-crazy weeks around Christmas.
I like reading your blog Kate and the fact that you found your own sweetness and abandoned sugar for good. I have made good progress towards eliminating it from my diet but have the occasional relapse. I do not beat myself up, I examine and feel why did I need this biscuit, although homemade and with little sugar?
This is such an awesome sharing Kate, it should be printed in newspapers for the general public to read. Sugar is accepted as normal in society when in truth it can affect us in so many ways and insidiously control us making it hard to reach our true potential. When we let go of these unwanted behaviours it empowers us to look at other areas that are also holding us back.
When I was young I loved sugar, it was a highlight of my childhood. However since becoming older I have realised sugar was always a stimulate and a buzz. Now every time I consume too much sugar I assess why I needed and why I wanted it?
Not ever being harsh on myself but being interested in my own behaviours.
I felt you have delivered some very important messages here around being addicted to sugar or being open to our natural ‘sweetness’. The latter doesn’t need the former. I have found that my sugar addiction changed when I started to recognise that it was being justified by me as a form of escape from how I was feeling. The more prepared I was to look at what was going on, the more I could appreciate that I am worth nurturing and that the flicker (or flame) of light inside me was actually true. There was a corresponding decline in the urge for the sugar hits. I love that these days I can go to the supermarket and walk straight past the confectionery aisle and not have even the slightest urge to buy anything.
Thank you Kate for the much needed blog on Sugar, as far as I am concerned not enough is ever written about this addictive substance, which seems to be added to everything these days. On one hand it seems as though the Joe public are becoming more aware, but on the other hand do not want to acknowledge their reliance on it.
I know from my own experience that I find it very addictive and the slightest bit of sugar has me wanting it more and more everyday. It seems to me that it has become an accepted drug, which has the craving side effects just like other illegal substances available on the market.
Kate I love this quote “I was seeking sugar because I was ‘missing the sweetness of Kate”. A powerful statement and so true. I too thought I would never be able to give up the dairy products I consumed in great quantities. And yet by allowing myself to feel rather than rationalise the reasons I should not choose this food, the change over has not been as dramatic as I expected. It sort of just fell into place once I accepted myself as an amazing human being.
I also vacillated between feeling tired and nervy when I used to eat sugar regularly, it was interesting how long it took for me to let go of the sweet stuff. I realised that I let go of it when I began to love myself and yes consider my own sweetness to be true.
Thankyou Kathryn. sometimes giving up a substance like sugar has nothing to do with forcing ourselves or ‘being good’ by not having it. As you have shown there is a greater depth to why we choose such substances in the first place and choose to run our life so erratically. Once we feel the devastating effects sugar has on our body, then there is no way we can choose it again. I know once I started to appreciate being present, gentle and feeling naturally energised, I didn’t want sugar because I found I couldn’t have those qualities.
Great article Kate. I remember you telling me that you gave up sugar and inside I was in awe of your decision. I also didn’t see it as something I would be able to, but it is something that has fallen away. Occasionally I may still have cravings and give in to something sweet but I can see why I am reaching for it.
Well said Alexis. It is amazing how addictions and the things that don’t belong can simply fall away.
Living without sugar is a true freedom that everybody should experience. To feel so light, clear and connected with yourself is certainly a blessing and true gift to oneself.
Beautiful. Thank you, Kate. Totally agree with you. The more I accept myself as love, the more I am able to treat myself with loving choices, and this goes in tandem. And what I eat is a great reflection of where I am at with that.
Thank you Kate I loved what you shared here – your beautiful story is deeply inspiring for anyone trying to stop any addictions or behaviours that are harming to them.
Kate, to share that you were seeking sugar because you ‘were missing the sweetness’ of yourself is a revelation for us all. Thank you for such a beautiful and inspiring blog.
Very rarely do we stop to question why we crave things. It’s like a complete blinding to everything outside of that which we crave. But looking under our need for these foods or any behaviours can feel liberating, no longer are we held in their grip but understand that that is how we have chosen to cope with whatever situation or hurt that has unsettled us, past and present. Thank you for sharing this Kate.
I love how the freedom that having no food control me feels. Sugar was an addiction for me too and it was exhausting to be at its mercy. It’s inspiring for others to read that it can be made history; we just need to uncover why we need it in the first place, address that, then see what happens.
Sweet and beautiful Kate what you reveal in your amazing blog is wunderbar. I also was a chocoholic and could feel exactly what you are describing and therefore I know that what you express here is a great opportunity for all other chocoholics in the world to think about their relationship with sugar.
Lovely to read your inspirational story Kate. I particularly like what your friend said – that you were “..missing the sweetness of Kate”, and this led to you appreciating the ‘sweetness’ you naturally are.
Love the title and the opening phrase. Sugar addict, uh? I was too!! Everything sweet please and lots of sugar (four spoons in a little cup of coffee for example). Coca Cola, cakes, you name it. I was really into sugar. Yet, in one of these things that amaze me from myself, quitting it was a piece of cake (pun intended). One day, I said enough. My relationship with adding sugar ended there. It took me some time to be out of anything sugary. But now I cannot stand what sugar does in my body. I get totally lost if I eat anything sugary even if a tiny bit.
This is a brilliant blog Kate – thank you for sharing your road to freedom. I love this line – ‘I remember someone summing it up beautifully for me…. they said that I was seeking sugar because I was ‘missing the sweetness of Kate’. You have offered wonderful insights and exposed valuable truths into how sugar makes its way into our lives and becomes such a vice for us. It’s a true ‘bonus’ for us all that you are able to feel your beauty-full potential and the ‘sweetness of Kate’ is being lived.
Agreed Samantha. It’s so confirming reading this blog, to truly stop when we might find ourselves reaching for a food, or anything habitual really, that may not actually be ‘in our best interests’. Kate has beautifully shared what it’s like to listen to her body and look ‘underneath’ at what was behind her cravings. Without doing this, we may at best be ‘abstaining’ from something, but not actually come to a point where we may actually wilfully leave it behind, as she has found.
Having experienced many similar things with sugar, caffeine, alcohol… I totally attest to this being possible. And then look at what can transpire… not only does Kate get to feel more of her sweetness and ease with herself, but WE get that from her too, rather than the racy ‘sugar-fiend’! Absolutely awesome.
great Sharing Victoria, there is indeed a difference between “abstaining’ from something and ‘will-fully’ leaving it behind. A beautiful destination.
What is occurring here is truly ground-breaking for humanity – if we are willing to see Harry. It turns everything on its head and asks us to look at our quality of love for ourselves, first and foremost – rather than seeking solutions that are simply outcome-based.
This is so wonderful Kate, and your one line here is the key for me: “I came to realise that I was using sugar to try and distract myself from feeling that I wasn’t ‘ok’” – so huge to consider and admit this fact: that we’re not actually doing ok. What I loved the best here was the analogy of ‘you missing your sweetness’, so symbolically true, and relatable.
Great insights Kate, I too am someone who has struggled with sugar having grown up with it being a big part of my life. I find the revelation you shared about it being about missing the sweetness that is us to make so much sense. My cravings for sweetness seem to come up when I feel down or needing comfort. Feels like it might be time to look closer and begin to appreciate the natural sweetness that is in me!
Great blog Kate, as kids growing up we always had puddings most nights, I made puddings for my family when I grew up and lots of biscuits and cakes and other baking. When I look back on those times, having been mostly sugar free for over 5 years now, I can’t believe I used to use at least 1/2 to 1 cup of sugar in most things I made.
I don’t need that kind of sweetness any more, and if I had that amount of sugar in anything now I would become highly anxious and shaky and definitely pass out having nearly done so once not long ago after eating half a banana. I felt very unwell and just had to wait for it to wear off. It is easy to feel how sugar does alter the workings of the body if you do have it after stopping it.
I really enjoyed reading this insightful blog Kate. I have been addicted to sugar for as long as I can remember and lately I have noticed that it makes me feel so anxious and detached from myself that there is no doubt in my mind it is a powerful drug. I may eat something sweet at 10pm, only to find myself awake at 1am and feeling terrified. When I check in with my body the culprit is always clear – sugar. Sugar does so much harm to me, yet it is so addictive it can feel difficult to stop the cycle.
Your blog has allowed me to ponder the fact that I may just be missing my own natural sweetness. I am inspired to connect to myself and feel this so that next time I experience a craving for something sweet I can serve up a gorgeous slice of me.
I can totally relate to that Alex, quitting something because I know that it’s not good for me has been so easy but deep down I wanted it anyways so I just put a blanket on my wants and thought it was alright. When I then saw someone eating something I’d put under my blanket I felt uncomfortable because it revealed that I still wanted it. I’ve been great at controlling myself through life but it doesn’t work in the long run. It’s better to be honest about what I still crave and can feel is not food for me and do something about it rather than using the blanket technique. And to be honest it feels like even though I don’t eat what I at times crave I still consume it energetically, which I experience affects me a thousand times more.
Thank you Kate – the knowing that I am the one with the strength to change things in my life is a big one. Often I feel I don’t have what it takes to change things around but I’m becoming aware that that is just a thought, not a truth.
A sweet blog, highlighting the importance of looking at the root cause of our addictions. This is necessary whether it be sugar, cocaine or emotional addictions.
“I was seeking sugar because I was missing the sweetness of Kate” well I know that sweet Kate and she is more beautiful than any chocolate or honeycomb. Thanks for the great blog!
“within me was all the sweetness and beauty I needed.” – Yes, Kate, when we connect to this there is no need for artificial sweeteners in any form.
Lovely blog Kate, the line that stood out for me was, “…once I started to believe that I, as well as my body, was WORTH nurturing.” It was only until I had come to the realisation that I was worth it, which was inspired through the presentations of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon, did I start to make the changes that truly supported me.
Thank you Kate for sharing your journey connecting to your true sweetness. It is very inspiring for all of us.
I love this Kate – thank you so much for sharing. I’ve been the hugest sugar addict too and I absolutely agree that it feels like you have no control. The power to say no and claim our own sweetness is amazing, I love your analogy of driving your own starship, that is exactly how it feels… that you are back behind the steering wheel.
Kate Maroney – I love what you have shared here. It is very inspiring and deeply profound. I was a ‘sugarholic’ and there is no denying that. Sugar sandwiches and chocolate were part of my daily diet growing up. I could not live without sugar through most of my adult life. It was out of control and I never dreamt I would ever be sugar free.
I was touched when you shared about your ‘sweetness’ and yes we miss our own sweetness and fill up that emptiness with the sugar.
Today with the help and support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I no longer need sugar and I really do feel cree inside. The biggest thing has been that I am not craving it and to put sugar in my mouth is unthinkable – it just isn’t in my radar.
I am the compass and I steer my own star ship and yes it is a huge bright star out there.
It is clear and has no exhaustion so it is not dull, slow or sluggish.
That’s awesome Kate, thank you for sharing your ‘sweetness’!
Thanks Kate for sharing a major concept here… that life felt out control because of your feeling that you did not have control over eating sugar. If medical doctors, dieticians, and psychologists, to name a few, could work with this concept with their patients / clients, think of the change that would follow. It would change the world for all of us. Just think of it…
Sweet Kate in her own star ship ‘parachuting’ sweetness as she pilots around – lovely. 🙂
A very ‘sweet’ blog Kate – thank you.
I’ve had a bumpy road with sugar too, Kate. It took a stranger to show me the harm I was placing in myself and also in others closely connected to me, and the resultant effect sugar had in my body – raciness, confusion, shakiness, heaviness, and a whole host of yucky emotions. Once I made that connection, giving it up was easy, empowering and freeing. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
How wonder-full for you Kate and for us – for you to be feeling and living your true sweetness again.
‘Finding my own sweetness opened up the possibility to not need sugar to enjoy my day, because within me was all the sweetness and beauty I needed’. BEAUTIFUL, Kate!
So with you Kate in relation to sugar! Thanks for sharing.
Kate, your story has a really sweet ending!
Awesome Kate. I have also had a similar experience to you, I found it very disabling mentally when I had an addiction – it was the forerunner topic in my thoughts, so to be free of the mental overload was not short of amazing. Thanks Kate.
I love the line “I came to realise that I was using sugar to try and distract myself from feeling that I wasn’t ‘ok’. Up until that point, I hadn’t felt that I really was ‘ok’. It took some time for me to really feel that not only was I ‘ok’, but so much more than that again”.
The whole cycle of wanting to give something up, from sugar to coffee to alcohol or whatever your drug of choice is, and not giving it up and beating ourselves up for doing it again and again, can be just a part of the self-loathing pattern of behaviour. We get all these thoughts that tell us we can’t give up, we don’t need to do that, we need what sugar/alcohol/coffee gives us, but what if all these thoughts are lies?? Big fat lies we have allowed and listened to?? The proof they are lies is living in me as I live sugar free too. I love how Kate puts it:
“Since giving up sugar, I feel for the first time like I am piloting my own star ship (or plane if aviation is more your thing than space travel), and I really can choose for myself the life that that I want to live”.
So whatever your poisons are, this is an awesome testimony of someone who has let go of her poison and the control it exerted over her.
Well said Kate and newlookstresssolutions – yes, this is an awesome testimony of someone who has let go of her poison and the control it exerted over her.
Kate, thank you for sharing your story – I too have been a sugar-holic. I love your words “I also started nurturing my body by doing things gently and with grace – rather than stumbling and clunking through daily tasks”. They are such a great reminder to be aware of the quality we do things in. My developing awareness of how I was living on nervous energy and emotional issues really helped me to kick sugar. I’m working on accepting just how much I and my body ARE worth nurturing. I’m working with simple things, like doing the washing up before I got to bed, so I come down the next morning to a welcoming clean kitchen. I’m taking time to do the ironing with gentleness and grace so the clothes I put on feel lovely. I am developing my awareness when my thoughts take me into anxiety and changing my breath and posture so that I can be more calm. I’ve found that taking care of what I eat in the evenings makes a difference to my sleep pattern, so I wake up less exhausted to start the next day. It’s all a work in progress and, as you say, a case of choosing the life we want to live.
Hello Carmel. I too have been living in nervous energy for most of my life until I found Universal Medicine. Sugar and chocolate played a big part in my diet, sustaining me as I was exhausted. I am still not sugar free as I still eat fruit, some honey and some maple syrup and it is very much work in progress as I deepen my awareness.
Nervous tension is so key in the conundrum of eating sugar – sugar feeds the nervous tension and we eat the sugar to not feel the nervous tension. A self perpetuating cycle until we cut it somewhere along the line.
Thanks for this post, you have summed up a similar journey to my own – I too have stopped relying on sugar as my reward in life and have never looked back either. I also used to rely on the thought of champagne as a treat to get me through my own dreary life, never realising that I had the ultimate sparkliness within me… I felt this one day a few years ago. I have never had alcohol since, as no sugar or alcohol can compare to the incredibleness I have naturally. I would never suppress this awesomeness ever again with such things.