Who Can I Really Trust?

by Rod Harvey, Gold Coast, Australia

Recently I asked myself, “How many people do I know or have known who I could really trust” and the answer surprised me.

Because what was revealed was that the one person who has let me down the most throughout my life and been the most untrustworthy is… me!

On the scale of untrustworthiness, others pale into insignificance compared to my contribution.

How many times have I thought, “I won’t do that again” but I did – with alcohol, relationships, food choices, inconsistent behaviour, broken promises to myself and to others, procrastination, giving my power away to children, friends, relatives, partners, parents, bosses, distractions and my thoughts. Need I say more?

Man, I’ve been letting myself down for a long, long time.

Have you heard the expression, “you have to earn my trust”? I heard it, but never applied it to myself. To earn my unqualified trust meant that I had to walk the talk, make no excuses, not judge or place a skerrick of blame on another, be absolutely responsible for myself… and all of that was daunting.

But I’ve gradually learned, particularly through another’s example, that we can live responsibly and enjoy a full and loving life.

That ‘other’ is Serge Benhayon, a person I trust without reservation. I’ve known Serge for six years and throughout that time he has been consistent in his love for others and inspirational in what he presents and how he lives. Yet he does not shirk from speaking truth, irrespective of the consequences and he will not pander to others to please them.

I now realise it’s not about who I can or cannot trust, because what another person does is outside of my control. My priority is to be responsible for myself and meet my own expectations without getting caught up in, expecting, or wanting something from others.

After all, I spend more time with myself than anyone else, so if I get this relationship right, then all else will fall into place.

So can I learn to trust myself? Of course I can and I’m pleased that I’ve been making some progress. It means commitment, together with the discipline to change some ingrained habits. It means shedding blame or judgment of others, dedication to self-care, being responsible, walking my talk and being totally honest with myself.

Sure there are slip-ups (hey the Universe wasn’t built in a day) but provided I’m lovingly consistent I will eventually be able to embrace the answer to that question, ‘Who can I really trust?’

And the answer will be… Me!

115 thoughts on “Who Can I Really Trust?

  1. Being honest in the moment by honouring your feelings supports me to be who I am and not what’s going on around me. I find my own feelings more confronting than others when I originally thought it was others. I am learning this is perfectly normal and yes to trust myself.

  2. Really lovely to come back to this blog, Rod. Me too, I have been making some progress by making more self-loving choices and my trust for myself is recovering as I learn to let go of the need to be perfect as well as the need for others to meet my expectation to qualify as ‘trustworthy’ is decreasing. This is a beautiful process.

    1. So important to appreciate ourselves in the progress we have made Fumiyo. I too appreciate the consistency that so much more there about speaking truth and making self loving choices.

  3. A great question, and I am sure many can relate with what you share, ‘the one person who has let me down the most throughout my life and been the most untrustworthy is… me!’ I love how you turned this around.

  4. Our relationship with self is so important, ‘ My priority is to be responsible for myself and meet my own expectations without getting caught up in, expecting, or wanting something from others.’ Great to recognise your responsibility here Rod.

  5. That is surprising perspective, but so true. I would like people to trust me, but first I have to trust myself, that is the key. Working on trusting myself. Everything around me changes with relationship with me.

  6. I love the simplicity of the wisdom you offer Rod. What a great question to check in with myself each day. Am I living the trust that I’m totally worthy of and what level of trust do I reflect to others?

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