Starting a New Relationship with Food and Myself

by Janina Koch, Cologne/Germany

I wrote this down the other week… a realisation from my body which describes my relationship with food:

“No food in this world is more yummy than feeling delicious me!”

I used food all my life to not feel me and what is going on – as a treat for me, a reward. I loved watching TV with my wine, crisps and Belgian chocolate. It was the best part of my day. I looked forward to it. No matter how bloated I felt after, I ate a whole packet of crisps.

I didn’t want to deal with my stuff and with my life. And I didn’t want to deal with my relationship with food, or understand that the way I was eating was connected to my exhaustion, lack of vitality and commitment to life.

I defended this way of not taking responsibility for me and my life for a long time. I was convinced that life was too much and that I couldn’t handle it.

But now I know this is not true…

My mind always said “Oh, it doesn’t really matter if I eat more than I really need”, in a not very connected, rather racy way.

However, now my awareness of my relationship with food is changing and I can say it does matter.

To eat when I am not hungry, or to override feelings of being tired with food, is a way of harming myself deeply.

To stuff myself by eating too much, and with heavy food, destroys the lovely connection I am building with myself. It’s a way of giving up and letting an energy rule me which is not loving, destroying the tender loving me that I am.

There is no joy in doing that, even if the food tastes nice. The energy does not feel nice in the body, either during or after eating.

And, even though over the last 6 years I have changed to a mostly carbohydrate, dairy, sugar, alcohol and caffeine-free diet, I still did not change my relationship with food. I still used food as a reward and to numb by over-eating – especially with nuts, nuts and nuts and salty food. So it has been a process of constantly feeling what my body is telling me.

I am becoming more aware of how my mind tricks me by dictating what, when and how much I can choose to eat. I can still fall for this instead of listening to my body. My body does indicate to me in a much stronger way now, more than ever before I started to listen.

I feel this is super-important to say all of this, as it is normal for us to abuse ourselves with drink or food. Most people do it.

But…. there is a different way to be!

So now, it’s about starting a new relationship with food and myself. It’s in the way I deal with food, in the way I prepare and eat it – and in what I choose to eat to actually nourish my body. Now, I can start to treat my body with love, preciousness and respect.

Deeply inspired by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine


296 thoughts on “Starting a New Relationship with Food and Myself

  1. As my relationship with myself has deepened so too do my food choices lighten. It is difficult to feel lightness and clarity in the body when the food ingested is heavy and dense. Like closing a curtain on the bright and shining sun.

  2. Having the commitment to constantly fine-tune our relationship with food is the best support that we can offer our bodies to be a vessel for the volume that is needed in line with our own evolution.

    1. Nailed it Francisco, it feels very self-loving to continually and regularly do a stock take on what we are eating to get clarity if the food we are buying and eating still supports where we are now and in our evolution.

  3. In developing a loving relationship with our bodies we develop a relationship with truth, for our bodies will always reflect the truth of our choices. It is a great point you share here Janina, as even if we are eating foods that are knowingly more supportive for our bodies, we can still abuse, numb and dull ourselves depending on our intention of eating. As behind everything there is an energy first, and our bodies will always reflect the quality of energy that is moving us.

  4. This offers a very true perspective on food and how we can use it, further to that, how what we eat certainly does affect everyone. We, therefore, have an opportunity to be with food in a very different way and to not use and abuse it to not feel. But the key is appreciating ourselves to a point where we would not even consider putting in anything to our bodies that dulls it, because the body feels so amazing and content.

    1. My body does feel amazing and very light…. yet I still use food to dull myself down, it feels to me some deeply ingrained habits take time as we adjust to a new way of being and of allowing ourselves to express all that we are without holding back an inch. I guess I am still holding back!

  5. Our relationship with food begins very early in life, often from very young. How many of us were told we had to eat everything on our plates, that the food we hated was actually good for us, and that you can’t have dessert unless you eat your vegetables …and many more scenarios. Children have a natural knowing what is nourishing for their bodies and when food doesn’t agree with them, so why as adults do we think we know better, don’t listen and make them eat it?

  6. The preparation of food has been something I have been observing lately and it is the care and attention to detail of how I cut and place my food on a plate and or container that brings a real smile to my day. So it is not only the food we choose to nourish ourselves with but also how we prepare the food and in what quality we are in when eating and or preparing. So very cool thank you Janina.

  7. “No food in this world is more yummy than feeling delicious me!” A simple and powerful awareness of your own inner beauty and preciousness.

  8. This sharing is so relatable. If I look at my diet – it has changed massively, but how I use food has not. Ie I still overeat or try and eat not great stuff when I am feeling not great. So certainly I am on the same journey of developing a relationship with food that is truly loving and supportive.

  9. This blog is so relative to any time I use food to numb myself . . . no matter how little I eat during the day . . . even if I do not eat . . . when I do have a meal in the evening I can still overeat and use the very best of foods to numb myself. It just goes to show everything is about the energy you do anything in.

  10. It is so interesting what we think that self-abuse is and we come to find that it can be in the smallest details in those areas where you would have not sought it, yet found it as you increase your awareness of the quality of your connection. Forget the right or wrong ways, as they only block us from truly seeing what is there, what is ready for us to change and how dear love is to us. No longer will we allow (self)abuse in our lives and world when we get stronger and stronger..

  11. I have an old time habit of eating my food to quickly, and have been aware of it for some time, yet still I continue…. not all the time but still too much. Key for me is being consciously present during eating because my body is too sensitive and delicate to be abusing it this way, and actually abuse feels true. Time to re-imprint this to honour my wise and intelligent body.

  12. I had not made the connection between stuffing ourselves with food and eating the wrong foods with commitment to life and the ‘giving up’ energy…. currently I am focusing on deepening my commitment to life.

  13. ‘And, even though over the last 6 years I have changed to a mostly carbohydrate, dairy, sugar, alcohol and caffeine-free diet, I still did not change my relationship with food’. This is gold because I can relate. I have made all the same changes as you Janine but just realised in reading the above that I too have not changed my relationship with food. Feels time to revisit and explore what is my relationship with food?

  14. Cooking a yummy food is something in itself. Yet, it is different when it is the only yummy thing in town, compared when you feel yummy too. In the latter case, it confirms and feeds the quality you are in.

  15. We all know that the physicality of our body requires food to fuel it but the nourishment we get from taking care of ourselves in the way that we sleep, move throughout our day and love and interact with each other is also a source of nourishment and sustenance for us.

  16. “No food in this world is more yummy than feeling delicious me!” – such an important reminder and great when it comes to looking at and addressing our food choices. Seeing food as a way to support the body to sustain living love rather than to get something from it starts to change the way we view it. There is also no right or wrong diet rather eating to support support our bodies is key which is a continuing evolutionary process.

  17. “No food in this world is more yummy than feeling delicious me!” How often do I stop to appreciate the deliciousness that I am? No where near enough. It makes sense that we might seek that feeling from the exquisite taste of some foods and then use foods to get that feel good factor that is missing when we are not connected to ourselves. The feeling is not the same and we know it but we like to live in the illusion that it is so we even use food to induce mind altering experiences – mind altering experiences that last for a while and then leave us and the body worse for wear.

  18. It’s interesting how so many of us think we deserve a reward for living life, and accept a ‘reward’ even if it may be actually harming us. So, who is rewarding who? I used to think allowing myself to eat and drink whatever I wanted and as much as I wanted was ‘loving myself’ based on the relationship I was having with myself at the time. As we deepen our relationship with ourselves, what we choose for ourselves keeps changing.

  19. The relationship we have with food is always changing and evolving, it takes a lot of honesty to review our foods regularly and to feel if they support our connection or dull our connection.

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