The Gentle Breath Meditation, Being Gentle and ‘Doing the Right Thing’

by Leigh Strack, Receptionist, Eungella, Queensland.

I have been a Universal Medicine (UniMed) student for about 5 years and since that time I have been doing the Gentle Breath Meditation. For such a long time I thought I had to do the Gentle Breath Meditation to connect to myself. Now I can truly feel that by choosing to breathe gently everything else stops, and I can straight away feel myself, my true self. This has shown me that this beautiful warmth that I feel inside when I stop is always there. Essentially I don’t have to do anything to get to it, I just have to choose it.

An experience I had recently has helped me to realise this…

One morning I woke at 2am and decided to stay in bed and connect to my breath. I did this, and like it has been for some time for me, I would feel myself connect to me and then I would check to see if I was doing it right. You see, I had been living in the belief that I was not good enough and this belief kept me in the motion of always wanting to check if I was actually connected to me and if I was doing the Gentle Breath correctly.

The previous day I had a session with my practitioner and at the end of the treatment she said to me there was still some tension in my body, and asked me what I thought it was. I knew immediately, and said that it was me “wanting to have done my treatment right”, to which my practitioner replied that it’s ok, so long as I know what a trap that is, the trying to ‘get it right’ ideal.

So when I found myself doing exactly that again as I lay in bed, I made the decision to stop the checking, to stop trying to ‘get it right’. I chose to simply be with myself, to breathe and enjoy my breath.

What a lovely feeling. I could feel there was no tension in my body. My first realisation was wow, I have been living with constant tension for such a long time, tension that I had not realised I had until I felt my body without it! How is it possible to live for 45 years and not be aware of the tension that I was holding in my body every day?

Then I thought some more about this and realised what a twofold trap I had been in… not only was I trapped in the doing of wanting to get everything ‘right’ (the checking if I was connected), but when I did connect, if I didn’t feel like I do when I’m at Universal Medicine courses and workshops (which is connected to myself and a general feeling of loveliness) then I immediately judged myself as not doing ‘something right’. I had not only been trapped in the ‘doing it right’, but I was also trapped in an ideal of perfection – an ideal of how I thought I should always feel. In being this way I never let myself truly feel how I was feeling and what was actually going on for me in my life.

Since having this experience it has become quite obvious that not only was I doing the ‘checking and wanting to do things right’ trap with the Gentle Breath Meditation, but it had actually been my way of living. So I had myself under this constant surveillance (tension) wanting to be gentle, always checking to see if I had been gentle, instead of simply choosing to be gentle.

It was in everything I was doing in my day… washing up, feeding the animals, working on the computer, conversing with people, just to name a few. As I became more and more aware of this I also realised that living this way has kept me feeling not good enough and has fed the unsureness that I feel inside, so this has meant that I have been living constantly on guard – trying to be sure that I do and say the right things.

I can now feel how ridiculous it has been to live this way, and that it is much simpler to live responding as things arise – no longer feeling that I have to be pre–prepared for everything that will happen in my life.

As I have begun to live this awareness in my life I have had moments of frustration when I realise I have dropped into the checking again. However, what has been particularly amazing in all of this is how my body has changed – it feels much more fluid as I move. I can now feel the tenderness that I have inside me and I am now able to express from my love and tenderness.

As the weeks roll on I am finding that I am being so much more gentle, loving and tender with myself, and I know that I am also being this way with others in my life. Now, instead of getting frustrated when I discover yet another place in my life where the checking has been, it is now a simple awareness and “wow, there too” kind of feeling… an appreciation of seeing another area I can work with and an acceptance of it, knowing deeply that it is no longer my way of living.

Inspired by the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

354 thoughts on “The Gentle Breath Meditation, Being Gentle and ‘Doing the Right Thing’

  1. What a lovely unfolding Leigh, especially the part where you are stating you found that gentleness is a choice. That it doesn’t have to be about just expecting oneself to being gentle, it really is a about making it a choice in ones day.

  2. Awesome to read this Leigh, and that you’ve shared here with such open candidness – this in itself, is a breath of fresh air…!
    My experience has also been that any self-judgement aka setting impossible standards of perfection, actually completely caps us from the most valuable tool there is in life – i.e. feeling our bodies at any given time, and the signals they are giving us. All we are able to ‘read’ is the tension, and not what underlies it – the keys that may offer us the true opportunity to respond to what we sense and feel. Such a ‘trap’ indeed – and well exposed here – to keep us completely not appreciating any of the steps we may have taken back towards a loving relationship with ourselves, and essentially, dally in the part of us that prefers to play small, and less than we truly are.

    1. We know on some level the reason for the tension that we feel in our bodies and it is often knowing what this is that causes us to ‘dally in the part of us that prefers to play small, and less than we truly are.’ As here seemingly we do not need to take responsibility for where we find our selves in our life, this is the ultimate trick, as to take responsibility actually frees us from our own self made trap and opens our hearts and minds to steadiness and consistency. No one else can change how each of us chooses to live our life, this we can only do for ourselves.

  3. Great blog Leigh. It makes sense that living from the belief of ‘doing the right thing’ holds our body in a tension and fear of not wanting to ‘get it wrong’ capping our natural expression.

  4. What you show Leigh is that it always comes back to ourselves, that is, how we are with ourselves. It is up to us how we treat ourselves, either with love and care or rough and criticising. The power lays in our hands.

  5. Leigh its interesting that the discovery of how you do the Gentle Breath Meditation led to you uncovering the same pattern in other areas of your life. Thanks for sharing how you have turned this into something to be curious about rather than something to get upset and frustrated about. Once patterns come to light, we then have the choice to do something about them.

  6. Loved your blog Leigh, particularly trying to get the gentle breath right, when we allow the connection to ourselves there is an easy flow and also with the gentle breath too and what unfolds is simply beautiful, no longer needing to try or be right.

  7. How insidious trying to get it right can be, and it is only when we are aware of this crippling belief that we can choose to let it go.

  8. Leigh thankyou for your blog, this has come to me in great timing. I recently realised how often I’m checking in on myself, but not in a nurturing way, more from a foundation of insecurity and assuming I’m not doing something right. How insidious this feels to not be free to be myself and also enjoy the person I am, and instead assume I’m doing something wrong. I’m sure this harks back to teenage years if not earlier, but the whole ideal of getting it right (which is ever shifting) is so harmful, instead of nurturing myself to just be me and be connected to me, and to appreciate all that I am.

  9. I love how you are choosing to let go of this old pattern of ‘perfectionism’, or ‘being right’, that was running your life, and instead are choosing to accept yourself and your love and tenderness, ‘As the weeks roll on I am finding that I am being so much more gentle, loving and tender with myself, and I know that I am also being this way with others in my life.’

  10. Every time I catch a thought or behaviour in the way I am living that is holding me back or keeping me stagnant is a miracle. It truly is special to give myself all the space in the world to see what is me and what is not me. The Gentle Breath meditation has been a great support for this.

  11. Awesome Leigh what a great revelation. This is something no doubt we were all brought up with the ideal of ‘right and wrong’ which is actually a complete reject of the person we are judging or in the case of self judgement, a rejection of ourselves. With my grandchildren and other young children I am around I adopt a completely different language. It is more like “you are not yourself what’s going on?” or “It is always lovely to be with you when you are simply being yourself.”

  12. This trying to get it right or trying to be perfect and always trying to be prepared for whatever may come, creates such tension in the body and is a great trick to keep us distracted and from our clairsentience of just knowing exactly what needs done or said in any given moment. There is another way to live and be in this world, with the gentle breath meditation being a gentle first step back to feeling yourself and your body.

  13. Leigh, you used the word ‘trap’ or ‘trapped’ a few times and you are so on the money, it is a trap when we get fixated (however subtly) to get things right, doing things the right way and striving for perfection. And it is a trap that I am very familiar with and like you, am becoming more and more aware of it, and lessening its grip it has on me. The Gentle Breath meditation is a great way to build a connection to your body so you can become aware of these tensions and see what they are for you.

  14. I agree Leigh, the GBM is a great practical tool to be able to stop and feel the beautiful warmth we naturally hold within us reconnecting back to our true selves. It is accessible to all through a simple choice to connect and return to our natural way of being and not seeking outside ourselves for anything to confirm who we are.

  15. Cracker article, showing the difference between thinking/trying and just living. When we try or think we are doing something that is already out of truly living it whereas if we put that energy into simply being with our body or with whatever is there then you will see space open up and have more energy. We can spend to much time in the wonderment of if we are doing or if only we had done or we’d wished we did in place of just consistently being aware of a feeling and fully appreciating that alone. We feel things all the time and only when we live in a way that supports this awareness do we see things truly change and make sense. It’s not about being perfect it’s about truly being and loving the fact you are where you are and have no need to be anywhere else.

  16. Ah this is a good one isn’t it, “So I had myself under this constant surveillance (tension) wanting to be gentle, always checking to see if I had been gentle, instead of simply choosing to be gentle.” So simple when you say it like this Leigh, we don’t hear toddlers saying to themselves ‘Am I walking properly’ or ‘Am I crawling properly’, they just do it and love how their body moves.

  17. Trying to ‘get it right’ is to be in constant self-judgment and this is then how we treat others in checking and judging to see if they are ‘getting it right, so we compound it with comparison.

  18. The incessant need to get it right is merely another version of the hopelessness of striving to be perfect as we human beings are full of imperfections that we are here to learn from.

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