In our world there are lots of self-help guides and books, presentations and recordings to help a person lift their self-esteem, self-worth or overall and general positivity towards life. These can be an accumulation of many so-called ‘loving’ words and affirmations that one can say once or twice, or be recalled repetitively throughout the days, months or years to come.
Affirmations can be telling ourselves things like, “You are good enough,” “You are beautiful,” “You are positive, happy, amazing, worthy, successful etc. etc.,” and even “You can do anything.”
But does telling ourselves we have all these positive, easy-going and highly desirable traits and talents really work? Does it feel real? Does it last? And do we really live it? Or are these words really just presenting to us the knowledge that if we tell ourselves repetitively that something is true about us, we will eventually believe it?
What if a true affirmation was actually something that was felt in our own bodies, already known absolutely and just simply remembered as a configuration within our every living cell: that we are already everything – that we are already enough.
Would it be possible to then use our daily words and personal appreciations to simply support and confirm this, and never to just tell ourselves what we are? There would be no need to label ourselves with words that describe who we want to be, leaving us thinking that we will reach our goals or get there someday; thinking that if we repeat affirmations many times, perhaps even sticking them to our fridge, we will one day believe it about ourselves in full.
Could it be that our number one and true affirmation is that we are love?
We don’t ever need to teach ourselves this nor try to recall it as knowledge – because we already are love, it’s just a simple fact.
With the choice to stop and to feel who we are, in our own bodies, in this very moment, is it possible that all anyone ever truly wants is to be love and to be loved? If so, there would be many places in our daily life where we would look for this love and one of the most obvious places is in the way we speak to ourselves; including what we tell ourselves about who we are, what we are good at, what we are worth, how we look, what we are capable of and, perhaps, even what our purpose in life really is.
The most common conversations we have daily – if not moment-to-moment – happen within our own heads. Our internal dialogue is where such affirmations happen, driving and striving us to be better or to achieve personal development, growth and success, but does this drive to be greater someday actually work for us and most importantly, does it feel natural, easy or truly loving?
There can be great simplicity in the relationship with ourselves and this begins with knowing who we already are, from the very inside of our own bodies, within our hearts. Our bodies know when something feels hot or cold, good or bad, and so they definitely know when words are just words and are not truly felt or lived in full – when they are not a part of our Livingness.
It is true there are many writers, presenters and courses that one could seek out to support themselves in affirming who they are, and changing how they would like to live. But a true and loving affirmation cannot just be found on a calendar page or a magnet on one’s fridge, or through words spoken at you by another.
When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.
By Cherise Holt, Nurse, 32, Brisbane
Further Reading:
Who Am I?
Appreciation, Appreciation, Appreciation
Appreciation – A Pathway to Love
Livingness
The Truth about Serge Benhayon 
‘Affirmations are the lies we tell ourselves’. However, appreciation and self-love and building that is true affirmation.
The livingness of love is an awesome description of the embodiment of the love we are which when we appreciate and confirm it thus expands and flows out in all our activities both those of caring for ourselves and also all our interactions with others.
What a great claiming of the love we all are, ‘the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.’ Beautiful sharing and confirmation.
Changing our internal dialogue is a big one. I didn’t clock until the last few years that I actually communicate the most with myself in terms of my thoughts and how I feel about myself, but it cant just come from the head because I also know affirmations don’t work, having tried them for years. Connecting to my body has been my way to make lasting change and it started for me with doing the Gentle Breath meditation. A way to call a stop and feel what was going on in my body, and then from there start to get honest with how I was feeling.
I totally agree with you Debra. It is through listening and honouring the wisdom from our body rather than telling it and our self something we do not believe that results in the changes we desire and more.
I used positive affirmations for years, but they did nothing for my lack of self-worth. Also because my own negative self-talk about how I wasn’t enough continually drowned out anything positive i tried to say. “What if a true affirmation was actually something that was felt in our own bodies, already known absolutely and just simply remembered as a configuration within our every living cell: that we are already everything – that we are already enough.” Saying affirmations are meaningless unless we actually feel we are already enough in our bodies. Universal Medicine presentations and practitioners have enabled me to now know I am worthy and good enough, because i have reconnected to who i truly am deep inside.
When it comes to exposing the false layer we can place on top of the existing reality of our lives, through the new age/personal development and spiritual practice of ‘doing affirmations’, the promise of “getting there” says it all really. Get to where?
In doing such a practice – and I did my fair share of it in years past – we are frequently seeking alleviation from aspects of our lives in which we are generally not happy and/or do not feel that we are enough. And/or seeking to ‘magically attain’ externally driven measures of ‘success’ that contain not an ounce of actual love.
Industries yet thrive upon this… emptiness begetting emptiness…
Without a knowing of love within our own being and reconnection to the essence within, it is all meaningless…
The thing is, connecting to ‘the love we are’ IS something that requires a deep ‘yes’ on the part of our own will, or yet again, we are left with words that sound good and helpful, but leave us bereft…
And so we need a means of reconnecting, of making this truth real for us – that this may become our own claimed knowing. The Gentle Breath Meditation, as presented by Serge Benhayon offers a powerful step in this direction – an opportunity to feel the truth that you have shared here Cherise, to arrest the ‘outer bombardments’ and quite possibly, feel that we do have an essence within, an essence that is this Love.
Stopping the negative thoughts and self-talk and allowing us to feel instead how much beauty there is about us is something very worth practicing and a true affirmation to ourself.
The difference between a mental dialogue, no matter how ‘meaningful’ and an energetic full body realization of truth and healing, is vast, and once the latter is felt , one could never go back to the former.
“But does telling ourselves we have all these positive, easy-going and highly desirable traits and talents really work? Does it feel real? Does it last? And do we really live it?”
In my experience, a big fat no is the answer to that question. I used to have affirmations taped to my mirrors, say them constantly, write them down, often each day for a period of time- you name it, I did it!
And whilst I may have got ‘a result’, it did not last as I did not really live it. I put something ‘out there’ and got ‘something back’ but it was not really me truly living it and it continued the illusion that I had to be ‘better’ to become ‘who I was’.
Whereas the true confirmation you write of, is learning to live the love that you are, with a deep knowing of that you start to live that, and confirm that you live it and that you are it, then it feels real, a strong foundation to live life from – and in my experience, it lasts.
Words are just words if there is not livingness behind them. So, where is the author of the self-help book writing from? From where is anyone ´learning’ what the author have to say? What truly helps is someone writing what they have to say from their own body, that is lived experience and to feel in and with your body what the author is presenting.
Words are just words if there is livingness behind them. So, where is the author of the self-help book writing from? From where is anyone ´learning’ what the author have to say? What truly helps is someone writing what they have to say from their own body, that is lived experience and to feel in and with your body what the author is presenting.
I love playing with words and how they feel and when I feel affirmation versus confirmation there is a real difference in quality. An affirmation feels slightly fluffy or transparent and something that is felt from our thoughts whereas a confirmation feels like clarity and a solid foundation for which we can continue to express and appreciate the essence of where we are all from. Confirming who we are with every breath or step taken is so utterly beautiful and supports our commitment to living life from the quality of vibration we then move in.
This makes perfect sense to everything in my life so far. I tried but it never truly made sense to try and talk myself out or into something. The way I learnt was always a very bodily, physical experience, in other words I had to feel it for myself and no amount of telling or teaching would convince me. It’s the same for trying to tell yourself to be positive or cheer up or be happy or whatever. The moment you have a conversation, even with yourself that is telling you to do something to get you out of something the whole thing is a miss. For me feeling has always been my strength, my make sense of the world that didn’t make sense. Whenever something confused, impacted or sent me in a spin I would need to feel how to walk myself back and the only thing I was able to stand on was the experience I had had. Anything else would always lead me around in circles.
Spiritual affirmations are needed when we live in separation to the love that we are and thus in this space we search outward for a truth that can only be found within us. And so we set up the futile outward search for love and our true self, our Soul, which buys us more time to stay lost in the mire of our own creation rather than simply feel the love we already are, the magnitude of the love we belong to and begin to deeply appreciate this. Thank you Cherise for these beautiful and truly affirming words that are spoken in and with the great love that we are.
So beautifully shared Cherise – surrendering to the knowing of all we already are within is the greatest affirmation and as such foundation for us to live from, through which our livingness, all that we do, is a confirmation of the love that resides within us all.
Really appreciating the depth you present here with such simplicity. We could be telling one thing in our head, but if that is not what we are experiencing/living, the lie is felt unavoidably no matter how much we tell ourselves otherwise and try to ignore. Disregard we often choose to live with is totally contradictory and negating of what we truly are in essence. What is already here only needs to be felt and lived for it to be affirmed.
Affirmation is never a word I used, but when reading this, I start to understand that what we affirm is important to realize. That we not just affirm that which is obvious and ‘accepted as normal’ but actually feel within what feels right. As only then we will know its whole and full truth.
“but does this drive to be greater someday actually work for us and most importantly, does it feel natural, easy or truly loving?” I wish the latter part of that question had been asked to me a while back….I used to be a big fan of affirmations – the kinda fake it till you make it – and the question you pose is a great litmus test and if I had asked myself, none of what I did would have passed the test.
Learning to live the love that I am, can feel a bit clunky at times because I have not done it for a while, but when I connect to it, it feels as natural as the day we were born.
It is crazy to believe that we can fool ourselves with empty words. A truth is known only when it is lived… everything else is just a lie to make ourselves feel temporarily better.
Such great topic! It is so daring me to be honest and equally all whom read this.. Have we been affirming those things we miss or would like to be lived, or truly appreciating? One who can answer that very clearly is : our body. As it is shared about – that what is lived will be felt, as our body will never lie at all.
Affirmations or saying the same thing over and over trying to memorise it can be like a broken record going around and around in your head in a tune of words that you kind of dance to but don’t fully embody and express from your heart… nor bring fully alive in your day to day life.
When you know something you do not have to keep repeating it, it is just an absolute truth felt in your body.
Some people are better at listening to what they feel than others, but the bottom line is that we all know, it’s whether we’re tuned in or not. We can feel a situation – perhaps being somewhere that doesn’t feel right or tension between two people. Acknowledging what you feel builds a foundation for knowing what you feel.
When our head is constantly talking to us, it is easy to beat ourselves up, and affirmations no matter how good they may sound are making us focus on an expectation of ourselves, it is so much more loving when we focus on being ourselves with no preconceived ideas as to what that might look like.
It just doesn’t work trying to tell ourselves something is true when it is not, or that something hasn’t hurt us when it has because it lays a shield that we have a subconscious knowing is false. It creates a relationship with anxiety that can become all to familiar to the point we forget we are trying to persuade ourselves of something. The anxiety stays though…. to stop us feeling completely comfortable in our own skin. Much better to embrace who we are in full.
Love holds such clarity and richness and we all know it deep within, as it is a part of our every cell and particle of our bodies. There is no affirmation book big enough to support how huge our love is.
Words can take on any meaning we want them too – and many words have been made to mean something they are in fact not. Affirmations feel really empty to me, like there is no relationship to anything, just a hope or a ‘fake it till you make it’ attitude.
I’d say this is a case of Quality rather than quantity! Even if we repeat words over and over to ourselves if we haven’t connected with the quality inside us then it doesn’t really help…
Awesome Cherise. As we begin to see the truth of what we are not it is vital that we appreciate the truth of who we are too. As you say, this true beingness does not have to be created for it already is but we do need to appreciate and nurture this innate essence.
The world we live in is full of pictures and images of how things should be, how we should be and what everything should look like. But these images are a set-up to make us think that we are beginning from a starting point where we are ‘less than’ before ‘we get there’; but where are we getting exactly? It’s like a dangling carrot that is always moving and always designed to keep us in the ‘less than’ mode and way of thinking. The illusion that this way of thinking holds us in is thick but there are definite ways to not get caught in it and actually bring ‘true love’ and thus ‘truth’ back to our lives. One way is to redevelop our natural ability to be aware of such pictures and to claim what is true and what is simply a picture or placed expectation and another is to move in a way that is not about the mind running the show or about listening to the constantly fed pictures, but instead move from a connection within our bodies that ‘already knows we are everything’ and that any ‘less than’ energy has been exposed for the set-up and picture that it always, always was.
Its great that you bring up sticking affirmations on your fridge and trying to convince yourself you will get to this, as you say it is not something that comes from the outside, it is knowing the truth of who you are on the inside and allowing this to be expressed on the outside.
There is something naturally ‘absolute’ about us that we can connect to at any moment and this is a profound and exquisite understanding to have; because from here, we are able to walk, talk, move and speak (communicate in every way) from a place within us that is more solid and naturally confident, unshakable so. There’s no place or time to go into doubt when we come from our absoluteness and so this is a concept that each and every one of us has the worth and potential in exploring more and more.
It is important to confirm and appreciate that we are love, this could simply be in ways like, ‘ in the way we speak to ourselves; including what we tell ourselves about who we are, what we are good at, what we are worth, how we look, what we are capable of and, perhaps, even what our purpose in life really is.’
This is lovely Cherise, ‘When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.’
Things which require effort usually do not work. There is a difference between effort and commitment, one is an expression of what is already within us, and the other requires all sorts of things to be justified.
This is great, affirmations are only from our mind, while when we truly feel deep into who we are we get to see the beauty that is there only needed to confirm but never only to affirm..
One of the choices I have made recently is that of ‘ letting go’, and I have found that the more I let go of everything I was hanging onto that no longer serves me, the more I am able to accept, allow and connect to the wisdom within my body which is then easily felt and expressed….
A simple choice ‘to let go’, allow or give ourselves the permission in any circumstance is a healing one and I love what you share jacqmcfadden04 as the clarity within our own bodies that is there always becomes much more easily accessible and lived.
Having a deep appreciation of ourselves is far greater than any external affirmation as the appreciation confirms us from the inside out. Thank you Cherise.
“There can be great simplicity in the relationship with ourselves and this begins with knowing who we already are, from the very inside of our own bodies, within our hearts” The simplicity of this is just gorgeous – thank you 🙂
I used to use affirmations to make myself feel better, but they never lasted. I would feel good about myself for a moment then move onto feeling like a horrible person again. It wasn’t until I re-connected to Love that resides in me, in all of us, that I began to hold a level of Love for myself more consistently. There is no affirmation that comes close to this, because once we re-connect to the Love that we are, we simply just need to live this. This is what fills us up, the Truth, not something we hope is the truth, and repeat to ourselves over and over again hoping it will stick eventually.
The origin of the word affirmation comes from the Latin to consolidate, strength and confirm something that already exists. Hence if affirmations are used to establish something that we do not already have, as in the New Age approach, then they are just lies that we tell ourselves.
On the back of that, if this is true, “The most common conversations we have daily – if not moment-to-moment – happen within our own heads.” Then this is the relationship we should bring the most attention or dedication to. Knowing that how we are with ourselves will impact on how we are with someone or everyone else. This is true for me, the relationship with myself in any moment reflects how outwardly my relationships are. In other words take true care of yourself and everything else will be taken ‘care’ of in that same quality. Thanks Cherise.
From my experience Cherise this is so true, “But does telling ourselves we have all these positive, easy-going and highly desirable traits and talents really work? Does it feel real? Does it last? And do we really live it? Or are these words really just presenting to us the knowledge that if we tell ourselves repetitively that something is true about us, we will eventually believe it?” I for a long time watched the up and downs from this type of ‘positive talk’. It was like you would talk yourself up only to fall down again to talk yourself up again to fall down again, the yo-yo of life. At some point you would give it away only to find another way to try and do the same thing again at some point. Universal Medicine supported me to smooth this yo-yo out and now it’s nothing about positive or negative but I keep an eye on my thoughts to see where they have me headed. I bring simple awareness to the quality of my thoughts and then reflect this back to how I have just lived. My thoughts follow the way I am, the way I live and equally the way I live follows my thoughts. The only true choice we have is the quality of how we live.
Our bodies are too intelligent to be kidded by our minds.
I used to repeat affirmations daily before I came across Universal Medicine but I found saying them from my mind with no substance, an effort to sustain. Today I know who I am; my essence is love and when doubt creeps, I say ‘No’ and confirm myself of this love. Having felt and experienced both I can say there is a vast difference between the two simply being affirmations come from the head and the livingness of love comes from the body.
Accepting and appreciating ourselves is key, confirming that we are love, knowing this deep down, this knowing of being love has to come from feeling this in our body. ‘When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.’
Many years ago I would say daily affirmations and from my experience they do not work, I was searching for something outside of myself because of the emptiness I felt within. Learning to appreciate and accept myself has been key to deepening the love for myself and all my relationships and then confirming this has been simple and easy.
Cherise what a powerful way to look at confirming ourselves as who we are rather than telling ourselves something in the hope that we believe it. I love the simplicity of confirming something, of being able to appreciate what we bring, which so often we don’t even stop and consider.
The amazing thing is that every moment and every movement we can either confirm the amazingness we are, or convince us of the opposite, it’s simply an every-moment choice.
Affirmations are more of a wishful thinking whereas that which comes from our body and is lived is known.
Loved this one especially the affirmation of you can do anything …. Mmm well I did and many times but where’s the small print that says, yes you can but maybe check in with your body ‘cos perhaps it’s actually not for you to do and might leave you lying on the floor in a million pieces!! The small print is not so small when it’s your body talking.
Yeah sure we can do anything, but we need to ask ourselves a few accompanying questions: Is it true for us? At what expense to our health or our bodies? Is it of true purpose, quality and value to us and those around us? and Do we seek to ‘do’ from an emptiness, a need or a rush or even out of distraction to not be aware? There are many, many, questions we could ask ourselves and the truth is that true truth and wisdom is held within our bodies and does not come from the thinking mind, riddled with expectations and images. And so without a Livingness – a true connection to ourselves we are left ‘thinking that we know’ until such time that we begin to feel for ourselves again and live the awareness and ability to read energy as we did so effortlessly as children.
“There can be great simplicity in the relationship with ourselves and this begins with knowing who we already are, from the very inside of our own bodies, within our hearts.” If only we were taught this in school, the fact that we are everything now, which really is simple, that everything is about our connection and knowing who we are in truth.
These kinds of affirmations put the cart before the horse. They say “I want x and I can achieve x by saying ‘I already have x'” even though that is a lie. Much better to affirm what is true and already worth affirming and to build on that. That actually works, permanently.
“What if a true affirmation was actually something that was felt in our own bodies, already known absolutely and just simply remembered as a configuration within our every living cell: that we are already everything – that we are already enough”.
Beautifully expressed Cherise, so much in this sentence to ponder and inspire; very wise indeed, thank you.
When ” …the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us…” is realised, then we also realise that this quality about us is more than enough. No more trying, proving or competing required.
‘does this drive to be greater someday actually work for us and most importantly, does it feel natural, easy or truly loving?’ I love this question. It exposes the whole illusionary cycle of perseverence that then leads to a temporary, short-lived ‘success’ that then must be bettered by the next ‘success’. Exhausting! Learning that success is connecting to who I am and living this in my life, learning to accept the evolution that living from love brings – and yes, feel like a fledgling learner.
Affirmations are a way to try to outsmart ourselves. A part of us trying to outsmart the whole of us. A more intelligent way might be for the part of us listening to the part of us that gives us true feedback – our body and then not affirming that experience but confirming what is already there and to build on that foundation.
The idea of being all-knowing Sons of God whose bodies are constantly communicating to us how we need to be and what we need do, and that we are completely responsible for everything that happens to us is very hard for us to grasp. I think it is the responsibility factor that mostly trips us up and leads us to seeking heaven outside ourselves.
The problem with these affirmations without feeling is that it already starts from a point of feeling not enough instead of from a point of knowing that we are love, no matter what happens. This will always lead us to feel not enough as the ultimate affirmation or confirmation we are looking for is feeling our own love, who we truly are.
Great point Lieke, affirmations that people say to themselves or instructed to say to oneself in the mirror, are ‘always’ coming from a place where we aren’t good enough, there is something wrong that needs fixing. It is never positioned that we are 100% love now, and our job is to discard all that which is not love, that is key.
Absolutely Adele, so simple, walk your talk, which brings a quality of love that is our lived Livingness!
‘I am already enough’ my body knows this but I choose to not listen sometimes. Affirmations are futile unless they come from a lived love in the body and not a grasping, needy mind.
‘When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.’ The simplicity of this is so beautiful. We are returning to a love that is already within us.
We have , built within every human body , a living affirmation of our true selves, and that affirmation is within the gentleness of our breath …. It is like a secret that waits within us all, , simply waiting for us to turn within, feel that affirmation of a direct and true connection with our hearts, and to live in the way that this guides us.
Cherise I can remember being a bit obsessed with affirmations. I once read a book with a list of affirmations and I fell into the trap of saying some every day as I thought they would improve my life. This lasted about half a year until I cottoned on to the fact nothing was changing. Fast forward a few years and my life has dramatically changed, I now know myself to be love and there is no affirmation and trying involved.
“… the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies…” Solid gold words here Cherise, thank you
I love your words Cherise – ‘Could it be that our number one and true affirmation is that we are love? We don’t ever need to teach ourselves this nor try to recall it as knowledge – because we already are love, it’s just a simple fact.’
Absolutely Cherise and Jenny, we are love we come from love so confirm and appreciate we are all the living Sons of God, because God is love how could we be anything else, no affirmations just a simple Livingness.
Yes, all the words in the world can’t change how we feel. It needs to come from a deep knowing and living of the Truth of our bodies.
There is a huge difference from what comes from the mind to what comes from our inner heart. We can tell ourselves something over and over but this doesn’t change how we deeply feel and the way we are with ourselves.
Then felixschumacher8 our Wisdom would come from the true connection and reflection from each other, if as you say ‘ we lived from our wisdom’ Is it possible this is how it was in times gone by and we have just been caught in the illusion of progress coming from knowledge.
Affirmations are there to fill the gap from us not living in connection to our natural way of being, to comfort us from the deep unease we feel at being separate from the love we innately are. Once we make the simple choice to be open to the essence that is and has always been inside of us affirmations are exposed for what they are.
The difference between speaking about something and living it is significant. If this would be really understood, humanity would close down its current Universities, the so called Meccas of knowledge and instead teach to truly nurture our bodies, our markers of lived wisdom.
This would be a marked and profound change Felix, what would life be like if we were truly living from the wisdom of our bodies first and foremost before anything else? The way in which the whole world and every system now works would naturally change as those that run it, those who attend and everyone in between would have Universal truth to bring to us all and thus a truly intelligent way of living.
If this were truly to be understood we would not need to say so much at all.
The difference between saying something and living it is apparent in the way we parent too – ‘do as I say not as I do…’ Even then ‘do as I say’ changes with moods, making it very confusing and meaningless.
We all have to look at ourselves and make the way we live our daily lives worth inspiring others.
Cherise, your blog reminds me of something truly important: that it’s about developing a relationship with ourselves and not about using an outside thing (be it an affirmation or something else); that the true gold is in developing and building that relationship with ourselves and allowing ourselves to feel and know what our bodies are communicating to us.
So well said Amita. We can’t make things happen magically, there has to be a reality there. There is nothing more real than the physical body, so why not live the way we want to live through the body instead of ‘thinking’ and ‘wishing’ how we would like our lives to be.
If a true affirmation is something that is felt in our physical bodies, then how far do we have to go to numb our ability to be affirming of who we are. What practises are in place that keep our bodies unable to feel the truth?
One of the most harmful things about affirmations is they keep you on the illusionary wheel of not feeling enough and needing to be more. There is always something else you need to do, be, improve to be enough but when you get there you find there is more to do. This constant chasing of the carrot is exhausting! Before Universal medicine I thought this was the only way life could be. But as I reconnected with my body, I discovered this lack wasn’t true and there was a vast ocean of loveliness waiting to be re-discovered.
I used to think (hope) that affirmations worked before Universal Medicine. They made me feel temporarily better, like a little shot of sugar. But it never changed anything within me and really just covered up the emptiness that was there. I have since discovered my body is the most amazing lie-detector and affirmations definitely set the lying needle off.
I have been pondering on the great harm caused by affirmations for awhile, so it was very confirming to read your blog. I was brought to this realisation listening to a person one day, talking about being positive and using affirmations, They appeared confident on the outside but I could feel that the affirmations were being used to bury how they were really feeling – scared of being sick, feeling they have to hold it all together for the family etc. There is such a healing when we honestly accept how we are feeling, rather than constantly trying to be more.
This is so true. It is one thing being inspired by someone or something, a gentle nudge to show you there is more, yet it is quite another telling yourself you are something that you are not. In doing so you take away the honesty and the integrity so needed to truly move forward in life.
I agree Jenny, living honestly really allows us to accept things as they are and vice versa. This enables us to makes choices to learn from that which is presented to us each day.
We can become very very humble whenever we are given a thought that truly serves us, knowing that it is then that we don’t follow affirmations that lead us astray. Once such a truly serving thought is given to us, all we have to do is choose it. And it dawns to me that these serving thoughts are given to me all the time…
It feels like you have nailed something here, in that there is a massive difference between affirmation and confirmation – an affirmation is the bringing in of something outside of you to try to make you that too or to convince you to believe it, whereas a confirmation comes from within you, and confirms the truth you already feel inside you.
Meg I love your beautiful comment. What you have shared so simply should be part of a lesson at school.
Yes I agree esteraltmiks. The clarity in Meg’s expression is very powerful presenting us with the Truth, undeniably so.
Affirmations are doomed to fail if the body they are being spoken to doesn’t feel it or know it as its reality. If you feel tired and run down and tell yourself you are a dynamic, energetic person, you know it’s not true because your body tells you so. All the affirmations in the world can’t change this. What would be so bad about admitting you are tired, taking steps to change whatever is draining you and developing a body that actually is vital?
Fiona it’s another seemingly ‘good’ thing to be doing for ourselves, but in actual fact it’s just another layer over what our body is showing us needs healing deeply, and positive thoughts might block out the reality but it is all still there… When our car breaks down we ask ‘ what has caused the problem, and that’s where we can start to ask the same questions of our bodies, and with our bodies seek the appropriate assistance from one who understands the truth in our connection.
‘…a confirmation comes from within you, and confirms the truth you already feel inside you.’ A beautiful reminder, thank you Meg.
Yes I agree Michael, a very beautiful reminder Meg.
I love what you write here Meg and agree with you but it takes some dedication and commitment to knowing what is true within you. ie. When someone pays you a compliment about how beautiful you are, if you dont know your true beauty within, you can say thank you but also scoff it off in a way (oh not really, its just the way I did my hair etc…) but when you know the beauty that exists within you (as it equally does for all woman) a compliment is confirming what you know. But that can only come with a commitment to know that we are already everything and the only place I have been able to truly come to that is through Universal Medicine – any other teachings have felt forced.
Totally Meg. Affirmations have always felt like painting over mould – and I’m always scared what I’m trying to hide will start showing through. I want to hide all the stuff that doesn’t feel great that I have felt inside of me, not realising that it is only energy I’ve let in and it’s not actually me.
Whereas comfirmations are feeling the truth of who I am. As I appreciate and allow myself to expand all the other stuff that isn’t me, that feels yukky gets pushed out leaving me. No fear of mould coming through!
Love this summary Meg, thank you 🙂
So well said Cherise. Thank you.
“When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.”- so beautifully claimed and truthfully expressed Cherise.
What we all want to feel is confirmation that we are already love and we always were enough (we know this deep down we just haven’t had it confirmed to us). This knowing of being love has to come from the feeling in our body. This is what we need to develop a relationship with rather than the many thoughts that come and go.
Thank you Cherise for a beautiful blog, to simply live the love we truly are that is what life is all about. It is so simple, but the mind with it’s self talk can railroad this simplicity as it has had lifetimes of running our bodies. Appreciation of who we are is a powerful way of building love in our bodies.
Agreed Jill, appreciation creates more space for the love that we are in our bodies.
Yes Fransisco, and it happens so naturally when you don’t think about it, simply be it.
Appreciate is a key that opens up our ability to feel love within and express it, the more we appreciate the more we build and know love and the divine within. I have felt an expansion within my body through appreciation, it is a tool and true affirmation that brings the knowing of divinity and our relationship of being with and from God in to everyday life.
Appreciation is powerful beyond measure Jill and it constantly deepens when we give our focus to nurturing it as apart of our rhythm. The mind and self talk is completely imposing, we would not allow another to talk to us in the way that we communicate within our own heads and yet we allow this imposition to continue. Staying with the connection of our quality and our movements with this is the key to not being owned by thoughts and knowing this, developing it in everyday life, is one of the (many) greatest things that Serge and Natalie Benhayon have ever presented.
‘an affirmation of what is already there has a true and lasting effect’ this is the essence Christoph, feeling and claiming the love that we already are.
‘What if a true affirmation was actually something that was felt in our own bodies, already known absolutely and just simply remembered as a configuration within our every living cell: that we are already everything – that we are already enough.’ Thank you for this true definition Cherise. If everyone read and felt these words, the affirmation book shelves in our book shops would either slowly gather dust or be taken down. A great replacement then would be the purple books by Serge Benhayon.
It is a very powerful quote, it is spot on, I feel this in my body when I read it. This is the way to live and know truth and love to feel it from within.
Yes, it’s a very powerful quote that I feel throughout my body. I can feel truth. Samantha thank you for reminding me of this true and powerful way to live and know truth in the everyday.
Like Cherise I have discovered over and over again that those pictures in my mind and the mental dialogue that accompanies them, some of which are attempting to affirm a way of living and some negating, all only serve to separate me from my body. In doing so, they prevent me from connecting with the activity of love that naturally flows when I make life about connection and the quality of activity I can bring to each moment.
This puts a whole new meaning to the word ‘value’ and what we choose to place it on in life.
Well said Simon. The flow of life can be a magical experience the truly surrendered to.
Yes Simon, it is the way in which we stay connected to our bodies and our deepest form of knowing that supports us throughout every aspect of life. Our connection, once felt, is the most precious feeling we can have and yet the total opposite of this is to live disconnected, separated or in isolation from our otherwise deepest part of who we are; this hurts us deeply as we can never ignore the fact that we know connection and to not be with it in life is a tension that can’t be not felt.
Being aware of the picture we have in our minds is powerful, and some of them do come to attempt to hold on to ideas we have about our lives, and some come dressed up and pretty if not alluring. But it is the quality of them that for me has been how I began to assess them, how do they feel and I have felt this through being connected with my inner heart and observing…it makes all the difference.
We have pictures and images behind everything Samantha and I agree with you that it is through discerning the quality of energy that they come with that allows their exposure and supports us to build more deeply a life built on transparency; of both ourselves and all that we see and feel around us. To not hold an image or a picture is simple when we make it about quality first and move in this quality which harbours zero judgment, ideals or beliefs of any sort.
A great reminder that the truth is in our bodies not from affirmations from the mind ,as we learn to feel our way and give less power to the thoughts of mind we can connect our natural order .
Feeling rather than thinking has been super powerful for me, it has allowed me to understand and appreciate who I and all are without getting lost in my head. I feel I have connected with the natural order of the universe, a natural flow.
If the affirmations that we say stop short and do not include the whole truth, then are they really self-help at all? In fact it is more accurate to say they are poison, that keeps us distracted away from the simple fact that as you say Cherise, we are LOVE first and foremost. The ability we have to feel this Love in our body, gives us the simplest, greatest and most universal tool to affirm whether we are connected to truth or not.
‘What if a true affirmation was actually something that was felt in our own bodies, already known absolutely and just simply remembered as a configuration within our every living cell: that we are already everything – that we are already enough.’ Yes Cherise a beautiful confirmation that expands us.
Yes very much so Caroline, being with our body as a very close friend feels lovely and super supporting.
I love how you have expressed this Rosanna. A true affirmation is a confirmation.
I have always wondered why affirmations never worked for any length of time. I now know that it is because it never came from the body but the head.
I agree, these affirmations you stick on your fridge feels like a sentimental longing, a want or a wish of something we feel we don’t possess, when a true affirmation just confirms what we know we already are.
I love what you have shared sehlleyjones 44: “walking our talk affirms the truth of us, no amount of mind chatter can improve or change anything.” It is interesting that in our world most of us are thinking that a great amount of chatter can change everything. We are lost in our thinking so to speak – it seems that to live what is in our body is too simple.
Thank you for sharing this Cherise Holt! I have been pushing myself to be “loving with myself” and thinking affirmations will fix me. This feels like a lot of hard work and not loving at all.
I love how you bring it back to simplicity and our body.
This quote just makes me stop, ‘Is it possible that all anyone ever wants is to be love and to be loved?’
In reading this blog again today the line “there would be no need to label ourselves with words that describe who we want to be” so true, no label is required as it becomes very evident if we are living in the fullness of the love we truly are it just shines out for all to see and feel.
I agree Marian. All the labelling does is provide a sticking plaster which ultimately is covering not just our surface hurts, but our deep and loving essence which lives within.
‘But does telling ourselves we have all these positive, easy-going and highly desirable traits and talents really work?’ It’s amazing what we’ll buy into to avoid havng to feel the investment we have made into that which we know within is not it.
With a true affirmation there need not be reason for repeat, as it is felt direct, allowing for yet deeper still connection with ourselves to bring about the next.
There is no doubt when we live life from our bodies…it is only our minds that bring confusion and complexity.
I can feel the enormity of what ‘accepting ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our bodies’ could mean for humanity. As such it would not be possible to wield hate toward another or ourselves, and henceforth illness disease would cease to accelerate but reverse its current momentum, therefore what reason would we have to go to war?
Knowing that we are that love and living from that love is very much needed, especially in times like this, when there is so much going on and terrorism is at its peak. In are days like today, we have to turn up the love.
There was a time in my life when I was really keen on affirmations. It was after a big break up from a relationship. I told myself things every day that gradually helped me to feel better in myself. But underneath this falsity of feeling ‘better’ were the underlying true feelings that I was denying. What I truly needed was to be honest and loving with myself and to feel the pain in order to clear it. Affirmations simply took me away from my true healing process.
I listened to two interviews of women described as successful. One was an ocean sailor, the other an author, both described how affirmations helped them complete projects gave them self confidence. Affirmations can be about getting things done or making you think you feel better about yourself rather than truly feeling the truth of where we are in our bodies.
Cherise, you offer a beautiful understanding of the difference between affirmations that are externally based through the mind to make life ‘better’ and the contrast of the livingness of love that comes from deep within us. This can be developed to re-build a foundation which is true and solid from the inside out.
So true Stephanie and when we build this foundation there is no need for affirmations for we already know within our bodies we are love.
‘…yet there is nothing in my body that is agreeing with what I am saying…’ What a great way to put it. There is a hollowness that comes with constant mental reinFORCEment. I heard an interview with 3 ultra-marathon runners the other day and wow, running like this is the ultimate in “I can do this” thinking – that’s exactly how they keep going long past the time the body says ‘enough’. Suffice to say their bodies suffer greatly as a result.
“When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.”This says everything Cherise and exposes the myth of affirmations.
Could it be that our number one and true affirmation is that we are love? That’s a yes from me . A very beautiful sharing Cherise, from your lived love, no question.
Cherise I liked how you highlighted that “our most common conversations we have daily – if not moment-to-moment – happen within our own heads.”
As we understand and accept more of who we are, the love that we innately are, the quality of these conversations in our head can naturally change.
I feel what we are talking about here is the difference between an affirmation and a confirmation. An affirmation, as we have come to understand it, seems to consist of a repetition of certain words to achieve a particular outcome, e.g. using the words “I am love, I am love, I am love” to become love. A confirmation is an inner knowingness. Here the words “I am love” emanate from the inside out, and need never be vocalised, just impulsed and felt.
A beautiful blog which brings such an understanding to the beauty we carry within us and all we know through our very connection to our bodies . Honouring this builds a trust and knowing that we are love and that is everything. The truth about affirmations you offer here Cherise is very profound.
A true confirmation can only come from the body, never the mind.
With every conscious, loving and present step I take, I affirm what I already am.
Beautiful Kate, ‘With every conscious, loving and present step I take, I affirm what I already am.’ I love this; what you have written feels like a very practical way for us to return to the divine, loving beings that we are.
By not identifying with our issues we do not need to constantly pull ourselves out of this space with positive affirmations.
This is an interesting statement, Kate, because I am working on letting go of judgement – (of myself and anyone else) and “I am equal” doesn’t work because it’s not in my body and I keep catching myself putting myself down (or up). Even ‘I don’t need to judge myself’ feels like a false affirmation, so it’s not that I need a statement to convince me, I simply need to feel how it is when I don’t judge and see how it feels when I accept and appreciate myself and there will be a difference that guides my choice.
A true affirmation is a confirmation, and that confirmation is made through a movement, a choice to be that which you already are, instead of living less than this.
Working as a counsellor it is not uncommon for people to ask me about affirmations and how they may help them, and my answer is always the same, if you are not living the statement or if it not something you already know yourself to be then they are just empty words confirming falsely, what you are not, as by ‘trying’ to convince yourself of something is confirming what you do not already know yourself to be! A very toxic and sneaky self-help tool dressed up to be something ‘good’ but in truth is actually quite evil.
This is a great way to approach this subject… Affirming and confirming who we already are, not trying to use ‘self talk’ to talk or convince us into something we think we don’t have already.
Affirmations are designed to override the body – to force whatever we want to happen, to force that to occur. This means we collect momentum to go against our affirmations. We can keep the momentum at bay for a while but eventually it will override what we want – a bit like ‘buy now, pay a lot more later’.
For my feeling Affirmations following an outer image, a picture how I would like to be or should be or whatever and so it is separated from the inner truth, the ‘who we are’ inside. To follow an image is a way that can not ever lead to truth.
Exactly Rosanna – true ‘affirmations’ are in fact confirmations. And this feels so different.
Precisely Alison, “just words without true meaning”. We cannot change our world by words alone, for them to have true power they need to arise from a living expression within our bodies. I have found, through Sacred Esoteric Healing, that owning, feeling and releasing my hurts and pain in my body first has naturally changed my internal dialogue and self esteem. Bombarding our bodies with words alone will not ever change the ill energy trapped inside us, going inwards and feeling it is our only option.
It would appear to me by resounding words that ‘feel good’ to the ear does not indicate any honest want for change but more an unwillingness to be that change, as perhaps the fact we are Love has long been disconnected from, and therefore access to feeling it from the body is temporarily closed.
So true Rowena, whilst it is important I think to actually nominate or say to our self what is the hurt and pain I hold in my body, it must be felt also. Otherwise words to the contrary, as in positive affirmations, are indeed energetically empty.
I agree Rowenakstewart, I feel that you’ve summed up the issue beautifully here and how we can change it.
Yes, this has been my experience too Richard – the more drive and push for life to be better or more, the complete opposite occurs as nothing ever feels complete or enough. Exhaustion, burn out, living a facade etc eventually take its toll in illness and disease causing more separation from “the truth of our being that awaits patiently within us for us to stop for a moment and look inside ourselves”.
Great point jeannettegold, affirmations for me have a degree of aspirational wishful thinking about them. That we are wishing or wanting ourselves or life to be different. Confirmations are confirming what has already been felt and known in the body, so the changes have already occurred and been lived.
The phrase ‘actions speak louder than words’ springs to mind here in the sense that we can hear or study great knowledge or wisdom and even remember and repeat that knowledge or wisdom to ourselves or each other but unless the wisdom is embodied meaning actually lived in practice through all of our daily movements, it will not change anything. It is our movements that confirm or magnify the energy that we have chosen to align to.
I feel the problem with a lot of self help books and guides and courses etc is that they are coming from the basis that we are broken and damaged and less than amazing to begin with and we have to go out and search, find, achieve and attain some kind of wisdom and amazing life. They then present themselves as the solution that those that seek for things outside of themselves are looking for. In contrast, The Ageless Wisdom has presented for thousands of years that we are already divine and amazing as we are and we have enormous wisdom and knowledge within us. We don’t have to strive to achieve anything or seek it outside ourselves, just simply accept who we are and return to our own amazingness.
This is a great point Andrew. I never read any self-help book, but the concept of being broken or not complete is huge. Being it the education system, the job, the skills, parenthood, etc. all have the same aim to form us into someone, to give us an identity a role to play. The fact that we are already all who we are has never been presented to me before Universal Medicine and feeling our true grandness is the most beautiful daily confirmation.
Before I came to Universal Medicine, I dabbled in a few self help books. I had questions I wanted answers to, such as ‘why do I feel really small in the world yet I put on a face that everything is OK’, ‘why is it that sometimes I just know in my body what is going on’, ‘why do I have very little self worth’ – these were all questions I started to naturally ask myself. Sure I got the advice to ‘be confident’ ‘love others’ and ‘be kind to myself’ – but none of these books felt true so I put them all down. When I made a choice to start listening to Serge Benhayon, it was as if what he was sharing what I recognised in my body. I knew what he was saying and he seemed to know exactly how I was feeling. To explore this and start to appreciate how easily it is to let go of roles and start just being myself in the world, is not something that can be taught, but rather connected with. Universal Medicine made this connection possible and is an absolute affirmation of who we are already but might just not be living.
Affirmations will only work if truly felt in the body,but saying something over and over in the head may satisfy the mind for a while but seldom last the test of time.
Well said Kevin and mainstream religious institutions are the proof of that. Repeating things over and over again makes people obey out of fear, but it seldom last the test of time and the atrocities that are planted in people through this have shown us their ugly faces.
We are Love and there is no words that can encourage us to be this. It is a connection with in that is the only thing that truly supports this to go deeper and allow more Love that we are to radiate out. It is a connection with the inner heart that no words can deepen this, this one has to be lived and expressed.
‘There’s no place like home’ and clicking your heels three times is a great affirmation of how our dreams work. But they are just stories we create for the outcomes we wish would happen. Life is grand when we live in it with no need of expectations.
Nice observations Steve! Wishing is like hoping, are and both fairly insubstantial – I don’t feel anything real or actionable in them. They don’t speak of a commitment to life and, yes, perhaps they have more to do with how we expect or want life to be rather than learning to master life for ourselves.
It is the quality we live in that confirms and appreciates us or dismisses and disregards us. We are not confirming ourselves if the choices we make are giving our body the absolute opposite reflection. The love we are living in our bodies is the confirmation and affirmation not the words or actions we make ourselves belief to be that. For example, I cannot celebrate myself with a glass of wine, as it is poison to my body, although my mind wants to belief it is a sophisticated beverage that confirms having a good life.
Beautiful, and an on point example of how we can use things outside ourselves to reward ourselves – the glass of wine, the cigarette break, the chocolate bar at the end of the day, and so on. All forms of affirmation, rather than the true appreciation and confirmation that can spring naturally from our inner-hearts.
Cherise- awesome blog. In the past I tried using affirmations from my mind as part of selfhelp book advice. This never worked. Today, through developing a body connection more through gentle breath meditition, esoteric yoga I am able to feel the truth in my body and confirm the love that I am.
I have had this experience too. Affirmations repeated like mantras come from the mind and hope to convince us something we have identified as desirable is coming our way, and soon!
Exactly Elodie, well said. We have missed the point indeed. I am sure our body and soul do not require a check list to connect to.
This responsibility is a big key Jeannette, confirming who we are in all our beauty, power, grace and love becomes not at all about us when we take responsibility for living this way; life becomes about true equality and a oneness between us all that disintegrates the sense of self that we so identify with and hold as so important. Without ‘self’ our confirmations progress to being about the love that we all are and confirming each and every other person around us that they are this same equal love too. There is always a sneaky part of ‘self’ that doesn’t want to let go of identification, hence affirmations serve to keep us less than or more than; but the truth is that we are all on our way back to responsibility, it is inevitable.
And the plot thickens – affirmations are usually centred on self gain, whilst confirming your own innate beauty, power, grace and love is for all, as it offers an inspiring reflection of those qualities in all others. How beautiful, powerful, graceful and lovely Cherise!
Could it be that our number one and true affirmation is that we are love? A true affirmation indeed: Words are lineal and hold no true lasting quality of the deep knowing and feeling of love that is affirmed by feeling it from our body.
I agree Kelly, love can be conceptualised, but when it’s felt, it is known.
What an important awareness and learning Rik, when we give our authority away to another it leaves us floundering in the same energy we were in to have given it over in the first place. To know who we are in full is one part but to back this up with the movements of true Livingness is needed to solidify our knowing in all situations, naturally this comes with the ability to truly observe and not be caught in the images and pictures that complication loves to use over us.
Yes Shelley this is the key! Living what we know and our truth leaves the small talk and the chatter in our wake, with each step and every movement we get to build our quality to be far more powerful and absolute than anything else could be.
We are amazing markers of truth as our bodies do not lie and this is the power that we can bring to our lives in each and every moment, to any problem or crisis. For all of us have an ability to connect to our sense of knowing and to knock out the cobwebs of false doubt that can flow through us. Imagine what life would be like if we lived completely by our sense of knowing and not from an image or plan? To feel the solidness and continual expansion in our bodies and our Livingness is deeply powerful and brings a richness of purpose to our lives.
Beautifully said Sandra, in all its simplicity we are able to confirm, consolidate and strengthen the pure love and divinity that we are in each and every moment by connecting to our quality and moving with it, from here there is certainly nothing to affirm as we are all and everything in these moments.
This is super important Sandra because we can be fooled to believe that ‘good thoughts’ are the answer to ‘bad thoughts’ when in actual fact they are exactly the same when they are equally coming from a picture or an external image of how we or things should be and thus equally as harmful. Without knowing our essence and true quality we are forever left to the mercy of comparison and judgment and never truly knowing and confirming the greatest most powerful love that we are.
I have just been feeling that anything can be an affirmation, even “I am love” in the sense that it is a thought that is repeated over and over to try and convince myself of this. But if I am not making choices in my life to confirm this, then it stays floating in the ether of my head and remains something that is not lived.
Agree Jennifer, it is not confirming to have thoughts “floating in the ether of my head” as what is not lived through our daily choices is never a true confirmation. Living in a world of energy we also know that we don’t think and if we don’t think everything that is in our head does not belong to us – it just gives us the impulse for our choices and that is what we live.
So true Jennifer … we can convince ourselves of one thing in our head but our body will always show us the truth of how we are living.
We can say ‘I love you’ or ‘I love me’ as much as we like but it is our movements which make up our livingness, that actually confirm the love we are.
So true Jennifer – living love is the confirmation of what we are.
To be honest I am still struggling with this phrase ‘I am Love’ and yes, you are right, it can become an empty affirmation in itself. For me the most important thing is to keep connecting with and feeling my body, that helps me to stop being governed by my mind, so I am not dependent on words but on what I feel.
Ditto for me Carmel. I was never one for affirmations per se but certainly one for being governed by my mind. Connecting with my body and moving from there is a moment by moment choice I need to make if I am to bring any sort of truth to my life.
I agree Jennifer. The truth is our choices determine all that comes to us, not affirmations.
This provides an understanding for me Jennifer, of how we can at times appear to be so very successful, having accomplished everything that we have set out ‘mind’ to. But without our heart and our body intimately involved in the process there is little satisfaction and not much experience of the gorgeousness of life, because we are not truly present in it!
This is so true Jennifer. We can say ‘I am love’ until the cows come home but unless we are in the livingness of our love those words are just like other affirmations and thus carry no credence.
Wouldn’t it be an interesting exercise to record all of the dialogue that goes on in our heads in one day. It would blow us away. If we really looked at them we would see that all of them are designed to take us away from knowing who we are.
You are absolutely right, Jennifer. None of our thoughts support us in knowing who we truly are: divine beings on our way back to our soul. Our body is the instrument that supports us in this process.
I agree jeanettegold. It’s like we need to have expectations of ourselves and of how our life should be with affirmations. With confirmations there is no expectation, just knowing who we are and the choices we make either confirm this or not. This also gives us the opportunity to learn a lot through life.
When we know who we are there are no need for words or phrases to convince us of anything. Even if we get hooked by the lesser quality of thoughts that come through, returning to what we know will always hold us in good stead.
‘…hold us in good stead’. I love that phrase. Hold us in good standing, and in steadiness – yes that’s exactly what a sturdy foundation of knowing who we are will offer us.
The message is clear. Affirmations are just scaffolding holding up need, when what we really need is the knowing that we’re already enough.
Cathy that’s great a point and i love the analogy. When we allow ourselves to feel that we are enough then we simply confirm what we know and feel.
Gorgeous, Cathy. The metaphor of scaffolding is spot on. I can see a Dr Seuss-like apparition, higgledy-piggledy holding up a teetering, tiny affirmation, the whole of which is constructed to give us something we think we need, that is missing from our lives. And none of that elaborate structure is needed – everything we need is within.
This is very exposing of the fallacy of affirmations Cherise. Convincing ourselves that we are something we are not through repeated self marketing until we believe the message – even when we believe the message this still does not make it true. I love what you propose here, another way, to actually confirm that which we have felt to be true in our bodies already. We are love and we come from love. When this is felt in our body as truth it can be confirmed and appreciated – no marketing required.
I love this phrase self-marketing Lee. Like all marketing we can be led to believe anything in our minds based on our needs but this may not be the energetic truth of actually what is going on which we can always feel in our bodies first not our minds.
“no marketing required” – love it Lee 🙂 !
I too love your phrase self marketing Lee. We can try to hood wink ourselves with affirmations from our heads that get us nowhere, or we can simply surrender to the truth that we are love, eternally so.
Cherise, your writing is always deeply heartfelt and I feel so much love when I read your words here. Mostly I feel your love and support for humanity. This I love and treasure about this piece. Your words here support us all to go deeper into our bodies, claiming the love that we are, not just in words or thoughts, but in our very being. Beautiful.
Thank you Cherise for a truly beautiful blog, livingness doesn’t come from the mind and it’s knowledge but from living in connection to the true wisdom held in the body.
Absolutely Sandra, confirmation comes when I feel that expansion in my chest. I know that the love in me is aligning with that of the universe!
Absolutely Heather, claiming our true sonship can be that easy if we choose our breath.
I agree Sandra, love is what we are and we can only know that by living it. thanks to the presentation of the Ageless Wisdom by Serge Benhayon the truth of love that has been known throughout the ages is once again being made clear and accessible for all.
The living of Serge Benhayon, the Benhayon family and other students of The Livingness has to be studied so we can see what is love in truth and not try to follow an image that is fed to us and the opposite of truth.
That’s right Sandra, if we experience how it is to live love for ourselves and all, then we will know by our own truth the truth of it.
I agree affirmations are only like plasters and we know this at the time but may continue as we like the relief they can bring and false hope. Definitely not sustainable it is only when we are confirming what we feel inside already that we naturally make changes.
The thing with affirmations is: we can say a 1000 times in our mind that we are beautiful and full of love, but if we don’t live it from our body, no matter how many times we tell ourselves something, it will never be felt, nor by ourselves, nor by others.
This is so true Mariette, after reading this article and these comments it seems obvious to me that affirmations will never work, we can not tell ourselves something over and over in our heads if we do not feel the truth of what we are saying in our bodies.
Exactly – if our movements are against what we are, there is no way of truly living it. In fact our movements, how we live and express with our body do set up what can be realized and thought in our mind.
And that is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
That’s a great marker of truth Laura B – that it does not need constant feeding. The truth just is.
Totally agree Lieke we have to live in a way we can feel who we are to confirm it, otherwise affirmations will not mean anything, and will only create another layer obscuring ourselves from being able to feel the truth of who we are.
Yes affirming needs to be a very practical living action, otherwise the quality of love cannot be built and held within the body.
There is indeed here a danger when we give emphasis and power to our thoughts and controlling our minds. There can be a great dichotomy at play when our bodies do not correspond to the dialogue we are running with and yet are at the mercy of our living way.
Developing a relationship with ourselves and getting to know who we are is definitely a great place to start. Re-connecting to this truth allows us to access great wisdom.
All anyone ever wants to be is loved, I see that everyday in the children and the adults I work with, and I feel it within my colleagues, friends, family and in myself. And we go searching and pushing for this love, yet it isn’t out there needing to be found, it is within us all. The love we hold others in is one special way we can start to allow another to feel how true this is, and when we do this the behaviours we don’t like, the disharmony will lessen and the choice to accept ourselves starts to shine through.
Before the Internet, bookstores had large sections just on self-help books I just did a Google search on self-help and got ‘About 143 million results in .062 seconds’ and trending shows self-help books has rated in Interest’ and average of 70s for ‘the last 10 years. That is a whole lot of looking outside of us for affirmations! When our greatest affirmation of who we truly are is the sparkle in the eye of the person that looks at us from the mirror.
I had a bookshelf full of self help books before I found Universal Medicine. Not one of those self help books helped me to restore my ‘sparkle’, however, through how I live now, thanks to Serge Benhayon’s inspiration, that sparkle has been restored.
That is a great point Steve. Self help books, audios and modalities are becoming a huge trend, and it’s interesting how there has been such a rise in looking outside of ourselves to find what can only truly be found inside ourselves – ourself! It sounds absurd when it’s put like this, but millions of people believe that this is the way forward.
There is a lot of people who actually know their life and the world is not how it could be and that change is needed. Unfortunately it also shows how many seek outside of themselves for that change when it is our connection within ourselves that comes first and then the world changes with us.
So true Rowena the self care and self love must be lived from within us otherwise any external help, advice or support cannot be sustained.
Spot on Steve, it only takes a second and stop to connect deep within the wisdom and true beauty that lives within us all.
This is so true Steve, the way feel about ourselves and in living that is the greatest confirmation we can have.
“I am love” and knowing this from our body ….. and claiming it through our livingness’ beautifully expressed Alison.
Yes Nicole, feeling the quality we hold is awesome, and for a while I was tricked into thinking that was it, but this was little better than using an affirmation. Appreciating my quality, and living from it is truly joyful, powerful and deeply life changing.
Well said Fumiyo,
The feeling of the foundation of our love is as strong as a rock, and is always present within our bodies. The trick is to be still, to surrender and allow ourselves to be guided by it.
I love this Simon – we are always looking to get to some point ahead of us but this in itself is the trick that stops us realising that we are already everything we need to be and that we simply have to let go of what we perceive as where we should be to return to the love we are from within.
When we live our lives from images we lock ourselves in prison as we can’t see beyond the bars. Being free of images is our gateway to living heaven here on earth.
Cherise (and all writers of blogs) – I love how a topic introduced through a blog brings so many facets and angles we can explore together and expand our way of living, moving and expressing to bring more awareness, honesty and truth to ourselves and everyone.
Thank you!
That is such a wonderful appreciation Stephanie – I too love it that there is this possibility to explore and expand together – that is brotherhood for me.
Gorgeous and I love this too Stephanie. It is such a joy to read blogs that constantly expand our awareness and I love the way each comment then builds on that foundation allowing each person to grow and expand with it. True evolutionary expression.
Oh yes – I have been down this route too Richard and affirmations were certainly an ‘improvement’ on old negative thought patterns, yet at some point, the slide back into self doubt or self loathing would return and the cycle continued. To feel the difference in my body now from re-connecting to the innate essence of truth and divinity within is building a rock-solid foundation to move and express from.
“Reconnecting to the truth of our being is so very different. We don’t have to create a new self, but simply allow the truth of who we are to be the root of our expression and affirmation then becomes as you say – a confirmation of the love that we are.”
We have words for everything and in this age of ‘LoL’ the list appears to be expanding. But what if we were to stop and consider them all, from the aspect of how they actually feel? We may find their meanings and the way we band them around might substantially change. For no matter how many times we may say something this is no substitute for the truth. When words correspond to the energy of what is going on we are can start to have a conversation that’s real and meaningful. Thank you Cherise, for sharing how you feel.
The same is true for glib and superficial politeness teamed with a fake Colgate smile = customer service, so called, out of some rule and how to book that makes one’s hair stand up.
Good point, Joseph. The abbreviated terms the younger generations are coming up with are indeed a reflection of the lack of quality in expression that we have allowed into our relationships.
Absolutely Joseph and with this we have learned to settle for less. Social media has shown us to go for “likes” and not for “love” and that it is quantity and not quality. Building markers of true quality in our body is the way forth and the only true confirmation.
This is a great point Rachel…likes and not love, quantity and not quality. We so underestimate the power of words and the effect they have on us, especially if we are not truly aligned to our bodies and what they are constantly telling us.
Now Rachel, one of the social media platforms has offered an array of reactions, including ‘love’. Love, reduced to a popularity contest, a button click moment that passes in a flash until the next reaction is reached.
This Joseph, brings us back to truth, honesty and integrity. Qualities that many in our world adore, yet struggle with living by.
“When words correspond to the energy of what is going on we can start to have a conversation that’s real and meaningful.”
So true Joseph, it is the intent and quality behind the words we express that truly have an impact and reveal whether or not words are simply being said or come from a true felt place within.
Our ability to invent new words is never ending and our current technological status encourages us to endlessly abbreviate and re-invent our communication, yet seldom does it encourage us to truly feel and assess what it is we are communicating. Restoring integrity to the use of our language invites us to truly enjoy and cherish the real purpose of words, to communicate how we feel and create intimate relationships. That is the joy of language to support us to honestly and lovingly connect rather than just make a noise to fill up the emptiness.
You reminded me of ‘buzz’ words Joseph – popular, snappy, fashionable. But “buzz’ says it all to me…words that give a momentary thrill but no lasting quality.
Again the wisdom of the body can allow us to discern what words are true or energetically empty. So instead of the focus being on what we say there needs to be an equal focus on the energetic quality that we speak to ourselves and others.
Beautiful Joseph, there is no substitute for the truth.
Nailed it Simon. Not just individually, as there is also a globally accepted narrative about life become more prosperous and advanced, when the opposite is true.
Well said Floris – Expressing from the lived experience of our body brings a completely different way of expression, there is a resonance that can be felt within and others can hear and feel the truth of it.
I’ve (ab)used countless and countless hours of thinking, reflecting in the illusion that I was actually moving forward / evolving / growing.
We can say and repeat many affirmations but not unless we can feel and confirm them in our body we can truly embrace them.
We can say and repeat many affirmations but not unless we feel and confirm it in our body we can truly live it.
Beautifully said Rosemary … a deep knowing of Truth.
I agree in general Felix but would say actually it is ”talk my walk’, because I have to live (walk) first what I than can deliver. 😉
Absolutely!! Without the living and expressing it is only words with no substance or truth.
Walking our talk Felix, yes this is true affirmation. For when we allow ourselves to feel the depth of beauty that lies deep within us, the only way I know to affirm it and to make it the way I live, is to walk with it.
Dear Cherise,
And it becomes a joy to expose those yet to be lived qualities and how we hold them back. For once set free, we expand and bring greater joy and presence into our lives and all the lives of others.
When we know the truth of who we are deeply in our bodies our livingness becomes the affirmation.
Absolutely Janina, and I am particularly moved by this question… “With the choice to stop and to feel who we are, in our own bodies, in this very moment, is it possible that all anyone ever truly wants is to be love and to be loved?.” It all starts with us filling our own cups.
You stopped me Irena. So poignant right now to read this and know that there can be a reticence to fill our own cup first, allow it to overflow with the love for each and every other person we meet. How can it be otherwise?
I agree Rosemary, affirmations from the mind come across as wishful thinking with no substance, and we can feel this but it is like grasping at straws for something in our lives to change.
I agree Julie, repeating affirmations from the mind is grasping at straws and will never change our lives, it is only through taking responsibility and beginning to self love can changes start to take place.
Beautiful Rosemary, ” an affirmation of what we already are is a deep knowing.” indeed it is something we already are so there is no need to try to be something, we just need to accept it and let it out.
Exactly Francisco, when we know it deeply we live it, and we just naturally let it out.
I agree Fumiyo, affirmations are simply words and when we are not choosing to live them it becomes like you shared, it ‘has no foundation’ but by making the choice to live these affirmations they become alive, true and confirming of our love.
Yes, well said Emma, this brings my attention to be more aware of the quality in how I move. I find I can still easily switch from being connected to myself to the next moment of not. So, the quality of my movements as in being gentle and conscious is key to confirm more love.
I love what you have shared here Christoph Schnelle. The affirmation is so solid and leaves no room for the doubt that can plague us for a life time.
When we let go of any image or outcome there is always so much more on offer than we can ever imagine.
So true Jane, there are no affirmations that come close to the glory of our grandness, they are a poor substitute to the immensity of our love.
‘Bingo!’, nicolesjardin.
So true nicolesjardin. I use to have these images and ideals of what I thought my life would be like. As I have let go of these and been open to what is actually possible I am now no longer limited by my imagination and my life is so much more lovely than I could ever conceive in my mind.
How gorgeous is this Lee…so very inspiring to be open to the magic of life, and appreciating the transformation that comes with letting go.
I love this practical observation Lee, we are so dominated by our images and associated ideals of what our lives should look like and completely missing how lovely they already are when we allow ourselves to truly be.
Yes Lee, the more we let go of images that are limiting us in many ways the more we can accept and surrender in our bodies to the what is.
There is a science to what you say Nicole, which I feel we, in the world are only just touching the tip of the iceberg about. Letting go of the pictures and the images that our minds show us and just simply surrendering to the feeling and walking our future selves towards us. It is yet to unfold.
How true this is Nicole, expectations and outcomes in any form only limit us from seeing the true beauty that simply can occur at any moment. With an outcome we are focused on an end point, rather than appreciating just being in the moment and being with ourselves and others.
Yes, when we let go of control it allows space for so much more magic, love and joy in our life.
I find there is also less effort and drive needed when I let go of the need to control, as in the space created there is so much support and natural intelligence.
Yes, when we let go of control it allows space for so much more magic, love, beauty and joy in our lives.
Precisely Jane, expressing from our fullness what need is there for a sell of a sweetly sounding repeat of something our head has dished up, that in actual fact tastes stale the moment it has been recalled as a fill in for the true connection not being made.
Gorgeous Sandra, and in that surrendering we are the living affirmations of such stupendousness.
Without the connection to who we truly are, we are only left affirming an image of who we think we are or would strive to be.
Great point Jenny, when we live in disconnection from ourselves we can not but not try and live up to expectations, as in disconnection how could we possibly know better. Yet when connected, we know there is nothing to live up to as we are already the all.
Absolutely, Jane. Affirmations are our wished-for way of being, but we cannot change where we are at just be saying words that contradict our lived reality. Acceptance of where we are at and our responsibility in that, awareness of who we truly are, and then making new choices which align with that will start to change the things that we may so desperately want to be different.
Hmm so true Sandra, you raise an imperative point in that affirmations not coming from truth clearly have to come from its opposite of an ideal, image, or picture that leads to more of the same. A truth that’s lived eradicates need (or neediness) for any such imaged affirmation to leave instead a surety and fullness that comes from, as you say, the body or heart to then direct the mind in connected unity, not compartmentalised separation.
Absolutely Elodie, yes i recall the exact same when i was young too…so much was geared around the mind, its control or power which i gave credence to back then… and yet when you start to come out of the mind and into the body to live from this and its natural sensitivity, you realise where the true power is. There is nothing greater than being truly connected to your body for the natural sense and feeling of true confidence from a self-authority that’s lived, instead of a confidence puffed up through empty affirmation to leave one in arrogance and lacking in true worth.
Agree Emma, how we move is everything, if that quality is agitated, harsh or jolty, then our expression and communication will also be this with thoughts to cement that way to then seed further movement. Without movement in self-connection, awareness and presence of one’s physical body, a word (or affirmation that is not from a lived way first) can so easily be the filler. Makes sense then learning to consciously move in everything we do with connected-quality. This quality of being is essential living.
“Our bodies know when something feels hot or cold, good or bad, and so they definitely know when words are just words and are not truly felt or lived in full – when they are not a part of our Livingness: – this is very true Cherise, that feeling of temperature is definite, distinct and immediately felt. Love your example as is such a great way to explain the workings of the body and how sensitive it is to everything, and feeling everything such that it equally knows the embodiment of a spoken word in the same way as it reads temperature change.
And we can learn to toughen up to ignore both in the same way. There are people I know who go bare foot in the depths of winter – proud of the fact that cold does not touch them. Others drink tea and eat food scalding hot, insensitive to the burn. We might look at these as extreme levels of ignoring the messages from our body. But virtually all of us have learned to ignore the very subtle levels of feeling our body is constantly registering in every moment. We are just like the self-proclaimed ‘tough’ person with bare feet in the middle of the coldest winter day when it comes to awareness.
Wow bare foot in the depths of winter!!!!!!! And I thought people jogging in just a vest and shorts was crazy!!! Years ago when I was traveling at one point I would do a lot of walking bare footed, gosh now I just see how incredibly unloving and unsupportive that was as well as how I was so desensitised to my body.
My daughters sports carnival in always held in winter, and in winter where we live we get to -2 degrees. They would encourage them to run the race in bare feet so they could not feel the pain. This was very disturbing to watch and I now keep my children home from school on these days.
Whoa! That is intense Heidi. What damage does barefoot running do to those growing, tender feet?
Toughening up! Good Lord, what a mess we make of these bodies in the name of “good”. And we wonder why we have so many arthritic, miserable adults?
Yes beautifully said Janet.
And it makes sense because the body is made up of the same particles as everything else in the world. So it is able to detect and feel when other particles, which move in the same way it moves, are moving out of order.
When my mind says one thing and my body is telling me another, it makes sense to trust my body because my mind isn’t in direct communication with the wisdom, the order and harmony of the universe.
Absolutely Zofia, our bodies know truth, we can trick our mind through affirmations but our body still knows this is a trick, not truth, hence the discord felt with affirmations.
Absolutely Janet. The more we connect to and trust the readings felt in our bodies, the more available and easy to access these readings become. It then becomes easier to discern truth as it is clearly felt in our bodies.
This is so very inspiring, and everyday is another opportunity to know our bodies language of feeling, ever deeper. They are undiscovered countries so far-the journey is incredible for each one of us to take as we choose to embody our soul more and more.
This is true… as long as there is a sensitivity to and awareness of the body. I see people walk around in singlets, shorts and things in winter; and I know for myself I have been oblivious to the disregard to the abuse I have meted out to my body over the years in various ways. Developing an awareness of the body might be a first step to feeling something more.
Yes Victoria, we can’t deny the level of sensitivity in our bodies and it takes great effort to live against this natural flow.
Absolutely Janet. The more we trust what we feel, the more everything flows. I am finding that the more I allow this and the more that things happen with beautiful synchronicity, the more I am able to accept that its because of my choices and these are simply being confirmed by what is taking place. It is beautiful to feel, without there having to be any big ‘rah rah’, just a simple thankyou to myself for allowing myself to feel and follow my first impulse.
Yes, and listening to the body’s wisdom gets easier and easier the more often I do it. At first it’s a little bit like trial and error, but with practice it gets very clear and distinct and fun.
Learning to feel and trust the wisdom of our body is so amazingly simple, powerful and profound – it changes everything.
And if we don’t allow it Janet, we ‘cannot feel’ or over-ride what we feel as very often we’re in our heads. As you say’as we come to honour the bodies wisdom more, we become more attuned to its subtle messages.
Great point Alison we cannot connect to the wisdom of our bodies when we have numbed them or made them racy with the many foods, substances and activities that we engage with.
Although we may have been experts at numbing ourselves, thank goodness (!) this does not change the fact that it is innately within us to feel and that re-learning to feel is about re-establishing this connection not having to create a new one.
True Janet, well said, if we allow it.
Reading from the wisdom the body is so accurate and foolproof. We have to ask why did we ever let the mind take over?
well said Janet, in the connection with our body all can be found, it is the greatest and wisest friend we can have and being fully with it will bring us space and clarity to know how to be with all that comes towards us.
Our bodies are aware of so much more then we give it credit for. The wisdom we search for in books and through education is found first and foremost in the body we live in every day.
It’s been an absolute revelation to me, to experience that learning to trust what my body is saying actually builds confidence. Having tried the affirmations, the books, the healers..everything from outside of me, to ‘build me up’ or fix me, it’s been incredibly empowering to actually feel that none of this worked. The only place to turn is within: back to the body, listening to it acutely, and honouring it, re-builds that trust and connection with ourselves, and builds a natural confidence that comes from within.
Given the way we treat our bodies we could almost say we don’t want to be wise. It’s like having the fastest Maserati on the block and doing everything we can to it to make it the slowest… Perhaps we don’t like the attention.
Beautifully expressed Matthew. Yes love is our spherical connection to life. Everything is everything including the quality we move, breathe and express from.
I so glad that someone has written and exposed the illusion of affirmations and put some clarity and truth into a subject that has had us so fooled for so long. Millions must be handed over daily for all these self help books and techniques and has anybody ever had results that last?
How often do affirmations and goals come from an image of how things should look or how we would like them to be,instead of just living from the truth that comes from within.
‘There can be great simplicity in the relationship with ourselves and this begins with knowing who we already are, from the very inside of our own bodies, within our hearts.’ Cherise I love this line about my relationship with me. Feels so all encompassing and so simple to live when put like this.
Yes these affirmations come with a seed of doubt. Reminds me of putting a sticking plaster on and not being too sure if it’ll stick. I know that it is a temporary measure that falls away. Whereas true healing comes from the body – the broken skin grows back, wounds heal from within. This love I can simply allow.
Tell me about it! I would say that for me the ticker tape of chatter going through my head is hands down THE main thing that distracts me from the responsibility I have to live in connection and express fully in the world. What has helped me hugely is the Gentle Breath Meditation as presented by Serge Benhayon – this supports me to move my awareness out of my head and into my body – to be consciously present so my thoughts are in sync with my actions.
I devoured a huge number of self help books, affirmations etc in earlier years, hoping that the next book would be the be all and end all of my search for truth and for a better life.
Over time I disposed of them all. Studying with Universal Medicine, I came home to myself, learning to trust what was within me all along, my own inner knowing and connection to soul.I discovered then that no affirmation was needed, simply an ongoing confirmation and appreciation as I reconnect more and more deeply back to who I truly am.
Yes Rosie this is so true. Letting go of the image or expectation is wise as there is often so much more on offer if we trust.
Great comment Alex – very enlightening. Negative self-talk works because we are living in the struggle and negativity just as words will lift and affirm us if we are living in a self-loving way. So in fact affirmations can be just that when they come from the quality of lived expression, although they would be more accurately termed ‘confirmations’ as they are simply a confirmation of the quality in which we are choosing to live.
Wow I love this Matthew. We can feel the truth of who we are not in what we say to ourselves to make us ‘believe’ but more in the movements that we make that confirm our preciousness and the depth of who we are inside our bodies.
I love how the words you write have the rhythm you speak of. There’s something very reconnecting about this sentence, ‘No matter how many times we can say something it will never be a true rhythm if we are not living it..’
Affirmations come from the outside calling us to be more…. the livingness of love is found deep within knowing that we are already enough.
I agree Nicola, Serge Benhayon is affirming, inspirational and aspirational for so many others – and this is completely down to the fact he walks his talk. There are no empty words from him.
I agree Jeanette and Susan, however I also understand why someone would want to have one in their home – We all know there is another way to live that is not the struggle so many of us choose to exist in so these kinds of things can give something to aspire to, and yet until we realise that nothing on the outside will change until we address what needs to be healed on the inside, they will only bring momentary relief and not be a confirmation of how we live.
Affirmations ARE empty. We could repeat for 100 years that ‘We are Love.’ for example and a person could still live miserably and without an ounce of joy. Whereas to live with love and feel love inside our bodies is a whole different ball game; one that transforms people’s lives.
A great question Elizabeth – when we feel empty inside we quite often succumb to empty words in a desperate attempt to fill our perceived void.
Great description Matilda – “affirmations spoken regularly end up being white noise and an imposition, ‘telling’ us what we ‘should’ feel”.
I feel ‘mindfulness’ is the new black …. affirmations do not connect to the ‘knowing it to be true ‘ and mindfulness does the same, it’s a constructed belief ‘ to bring a quality or state of being conscious or aware of something’ which once again takes away the responsibility to know and claim our own quality and take responsibility for the energy we are choosing. Without this its just a mind game with no true livingness.
I agree merrileepettinato. I find affirmations and using the force of my mind to create a reality is completely different to the actual power of knowing of something with my whole being.
I like the way you have expanded that Susan. It’s true that affirmations keep us in perpetual motion – they are all from the head, mental concepts that have absolutely no root in the stillness we are from and how our bodies naturally are.
That’s so true Rosie – holding onto images or outcomes is another way of limiting ourselves which prevents us from seeing clearly what truly lies before us.
Yes Vicky Cooke and affirmations become a relief, not different to going to the gym or eating. If I first do not connect with my body there is not benefit at all – just more abuse of it.
To me, affirmations just confirm that I am not enough and therefore require affirmations, to be more, to be better. I love what you share, Cherise – we are Love, we are already enough, we just need to choose to live this on a daily basis.
Exactly right Emily – we have to DO affirmations but we already are LOVE – no doing required, just simply BEING THE LOVE THAT WE ARE.
and appreciating and accepting that seems like the way to go ! 🙂
Richard that’s an important clarification ” Beliefs always have an element of doubt in them, if they didn’t they would be knowings and not beliefs.” A belief can be a construct, an imposed ideal … knowing is acceptance of the what is.
That’s gorgeous Rosie ” there is always so much more on offer that we can ever imagine” being open to this with no set agendas or outcomes allows the flow in our lives.
Vicky this reminds me of an old saying ” he who tries has a trying time” a bit like affirmations, they put a distance between the connection to who we ar naturally.
Yes Christoph to construct an affirmation in the mind firstly is to confirm we are not that already but wish to be. In knowing who we are naturally and living with the knowing we are a direct reflection of love … we are all equally and never separated from the Love of God. Live in this knowing and your expression confirms that which you already are.
“We don’t ever need to teach ourselves this nor try to recall it as knowledge – because we already are love, it’s just a simple fact.’ Reading this Cherise I was feeling how amazing this would be if we naturally reflected the fullness of our love to each other. If children were brought up knowing they were love any need for self-help affirmations in later life, self-help anything, wouldn’t be sought because people would know with an inner confidence who they already are.
What if there is something for humanity to experience within themselves about who they truly are that is so grand that beliefs do not even exist in this place? And if this is true, what use then would affirmations be?
Melinda what you say is profound. Affirmations make us believe we have to substitute one belief with a more favourable one. A completely false and disempowering set up. They hoodwink us out of the possibility of remembering that who we are is “so grand that beliefs do not even exist in this place”.
I love what you have shared here, Christoph. I am feeling that there may be a huge difference in affirming what we already know in our essence as opposed to saying something affirming and hoping it will happen. Love is an inside job and hope is always coming from outside of us.
This deeply resonates in me Emily. Affirmations add to the bubble and illusion of ‘doing’. It always has an end point, some sort of image we want to get to or be. We’ll never get to our ‘being’ by ‘doing’. Life is about surrendering deeper and deeper. Building a forever deepening connection with our own body. The complete opposite of affirmations. While writing these words, I am realising that The Livingness of Love never ends, as life never ends. How Beautiful and inspiring is this. This blog is an offering of letting go of affirmations and all other (mental or emotional) goals and drives. Deeply inspiring Cherise and Emily.
Gorgeous to read Floris – Well said. “some sort of image we want to get to or be.” this is a great tell tale sign of how affirmations are not it. Life cannot conform to images in our head and how things ‘should’ be. We are twisting, contorting and kidding ourselves when we try to make it so.
So True Emily, reading your words and my own comment, deepen the knowing of the fact that any affirmation takes us away from surrendering, thus takes us away from the precious connection with life and ourselves. To really let go of all the affirmations and images is asking me to be deeply honest and also have a foundation of who I am, so I can return to that known ‘me’, whenever I’m out. Because if I don’t have a known ‘me’, I’m somehow lost and it’s much more difficult to discern when I’m out (or not) = adhering to an affirmation of any sort.
l love this truth Amina. When we walk our love in movement rather than talk our love in words we take big steps towards ourselves and our evolution expands ever outwards. Touching all.
Yes if it’s not expressed through my body it’s not ‘alive’ in me. Movements of love expressed first without thoughts or words.
Awesome exposure as to what affirnations actually are Bernadette. Set ups from our mind of endless empty controling thoughts.
When l gently move from an absolute knowing that each step is love expressing in full and each little movement is another manifestation of that love, it finally begins to build a momentum over time, in my body. lt creates space for me to have a ‘lived’ experience of loving expression. This is the key that changes everything and it has nothing to do with the mind.
Yes this is awesome to expose. l did hundreds of variations of these affirmations for years during my lowest point in life. They simply served to make me feel the everything l believed that l was ‘Not’. l felt all the empty mess and inadequacy that l believed l was at the time. At no time ever did l entertain the possibility that l was already “enough”.
Now l know better. l have Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon to thank for this epiphany and for finally, getting through to me with my own Truth of who l really am. l am forever grateful to him. As he would tell me it was my own amazing soul that showed me the way back home, that walks with me on my journey and carrys me when l am hurting badly. He would not take the credit for that, however he is the walking, living, pointer and marker of all truth for me. As he is the living reflection of all that l am.
The other day I had an example which showed me the nature of affirmations. I knew my body wanted to take it slowly yet I chose to put several other circumstances ahead of the care for my body, told myself ‘you can do it’ and rushed forward carrying on with something, an activity that needed more attention than I was able to give it. When I sat down and picked up my iPad to read some blogs I noticed my hands were shaking ever so slightly, but I could tell. There was buzzing in my arms and when I stopped to feel I could tell it was the same throughout my body. I at that moment knew this was not my natural energy – I immediately knew it was about me overriding what my body had asked for a few minutes before. I had in effect called in a force to help me perform what I had just done and my nervous system had been taken into an excess so that my body could perform the action. In that moment I knew clearly how the standard practice of using affirmations to force a change in our behaviour works! Yes on the surface we may get the result. But what is actually happening is the absolute opposite to deepening the level of love, power and awareness in our body.
I love this Golnaz and in fact it mirrors a recent experience of mine almost exactly. We can tell ourselves whatever we like and merrily follow that line, but our bodies will let us know about it – if we care to listen and observe.
I agree Christoph – wishing for something in our life and believing that by repeating this does not have any true power. Confirming what we know is true from deep within – that we are love ,holds the true power of healing.
Further to this… confirmation, which is an appreciation, is only effective when it is taken is an acknowledged within the body as Cherise has so beautifully said. Likewise an affirmation begins and remains in the head, as a wish, a thought and ultimately an empty experience for the body.
When I first learnt the difference between confirmation, which appreciates something that already exists, and an affirmation, which tells us that what is being sought does not in fact exist in the first place… I understood in that instance why affirmations do not work. So simple, and so powerful.
Yes agreed Heather, I did affirmations over many years and nothing whatsoever changed, except I spent that time kidding myself that I was changing! Since Universal Medicine l’ve not even thought to do a single affirmation and my life has changed immeasurably.
Thank you, Cherise. These words feel so true and make me melt – “There can be great simplicity in the relationship with ourselves and this begins with knowing who we already are, from the very inside of our own bodies, within our hearts.”
“It is not from the mind that the truth is known but through the heart that Love and truth are known.” So very true, Carola, beautifully shared.
Yes, we can tell ourselves all kind of things that aren’t true and for a little while we can believe them, but the truth will eventually be revealed, sometimes quickly and other times not so quickly.
How big is the mess we have created in the world that the simple fact that we are Love has been replaced with looking outside of ourselves for this Love to then fill us up? It really is self-defeating.
“When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us, we can then live each day knowing and confirming this as our truth through the choices we make to accept ourselves in full and appreciating the wisdom we hold in our own bodies.” So true, Cherise, and part of accepting this is actually realising that we are in fact Love, and all we need to do is re-connect to it within our hearts. This stops the seeking behaviours so many of us can find ourselves in and what drives the personal development arena.
I love this blog, Cherise, as it calls to account the majority of what the spiritual new age is based on. Empty affirmations. Thank you for such an insightful sharing.
“What if a true affirmation was actually something that was felt in our own bodies, already known absolutely and just simply remembered as a configuration within our every living cell: that we are already everything – that we are already enough.” This was my exact experience today. This is a beautiful way of saying we have all we need, we just need to call it forth.
Cherise this is a very clear and beautiful blog, and just the medicine I needed for today. It reminds me that as long as I connect to the love I am and thereby confirm it, whatever is not of that quality can just drop away.
Elegantly expressed Alex – words without a living quality are just a collection of alphabet letters.
Richard I relate to this pearl – ‘using affirmations in this way simply served to confirm the fact that I didn’t like myself very much and needed something to fix me.’ Reconnecting to our inner most is truly confirming.
Good point Elodie Darwish. The need for affirmations is really indicative of a belief that something feels like it is missing in our lives and hence ends up being a confirmation of what we believe. When we reconnect to the fullness of being in our body, our expression is more one of confirmation of who we already are, rather than an affirmation that seeks to become more.
Well said Leigh Strack. To have any power, an affirmation must be rooted in what already is within us and a confirmation of the fact – not a wish or a hope that we can magically manifest what we desire.
Precisely Alex Braun – in truth if we seek to become, we end up affirming the notion that we are not whatever it is we are seeking. We live in the illusion that we are becoming ‘enough’ – but our actions simply confirm that we are not enough.
If there is no foundation of love and alignment to truth, no amount of affirmation will change that. From a deep inner connection everything around us confirms the truth of us.
Beautifully and simply said Victoria – Cherise’s blog has busted the ‘new age’ illusion that we can think or talk ourselves out of unloving situations. Like you expressed, ‘If there is no foundation of love and alignment to truth, no amount of affirmation will change that.’
I remember years ago having an affirmation journal where I would pen ‘positive’ statements I hoped would come to pass ….. It never felt true.
If we first do not have a living relationship with our self that is loving and true we will not feel the fullness of who we are and will always be looking outside for something to confirm us.
Agree with you Victoria, i recall positive affirmations and mantras being really strongly used in my area of work (sales), and all they did was leave you feeling never enough and having to do more.. which i guess was the point behind them/why they were used for ‘training purposes’ – to drive you to deliver more…and in the process leave you depleted, hungry for more.To feel the fullness of ourselves is naturally expansive, and a feeling infinitely greater than any affirmation that doesn’t honour or confirm this but instead substitutes with empty words.
This is exactly what affirmations do ‘label ourselves with words that describe who we want to be, leaving us thinking that we will reach our goals or get there someday; thinking that if we repeat affirmations many times, perhaps even sticking them to our fridge, we will one day believe it about ourselves in full.’ It is like mentally saying something over and over again because we want to be in a different place than we are. It is futile and doesn’t work. Trust me I did this for years even to the point where every morning I would read this long list out! What is needed is honesty, self-love and appreciation of where we are first at, including the understanding that all that has happened in our life has at some level been our choice. Then things start to change. Truly. I deeply appreciative Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine they have taught and continue to teach us all so very very much.
A gorgeous confirmation of the spherical love that connects us all. Thank you Cherise.
I, like many I knew, tried affirmations by the dozens, in total desperation as nothing else we had tried had been the fix for the mess in our lives: we were always looking outside of us for those elusive answers to the meaning of our lives, and life in general. When I was presented with the wisdom, “that we are already everything – that we are already enough”, I was stopped in my tracks as I could feel the truth of this revelation resonating in a very familiar way through every part of me. That was the day my outer searching ended for good and the path back to who I was, and always had been, began.
Great comment Ingrid. What an amazing moment to be presented with the whole truth, to accept it and to stop the endless search outside of ourselves that leads us to a feeling of emptiness and therefore needing to continue on with our search. The search for me has also stopped since starting on the journey to connecting back to myself.
I love your sharing here Matthew of the ways we affirm ourselves in our movements. We can say many words but without true movement to back them up, words stay empty.
Well said Vicky. We cannot expect our lives to be sorted out for us by affirmations and other people, nor our self worth confirmed through compliments or accolades, as these will not change the emptiness or disregard in our bodies as a loving relationship with ourselves is something only we can develop.
It sure is Marika and can explain why so many people can invest a whole lot of time in affirmations to be disappointed that nothing seems to change. Energy is what always comes first.
Thank you Cherise, there is a world of difference between repeating nice sounding words in the vain hope that some day it will morph us into a different person verses re-connecting to the love we already are and living that every day. The two approaches are very different as the latter one requires a deep honesty and self responsibility not even mentioned in the first approach. This means tackling the internal dialogue and not allowing one iota of negativity or criticism towards oneself and hence others, but observing ourselves, our choices and behaviours in absolute honesty, so that our inner love nourishes our expression, choices and actions, something that the world of affirmations never ask us to do.
The use of ‘affirmations’ by the Spiritual/New Age Movement is to practice ‘positive thinking’, which is a complete misuse and bastardisation of the meaning of the word. The original meaning of an affirmation is ‘a declaration that something is true’, which is confirm something is true and not the wish or desire for something to be true. Just by wishing or desiring for something and verbalising that desire does not make it manifest, it has to be lived and embodied to make it true. Therefore affirmations, as used by the Spiritual/New Age Movement, are ‘lies we tell ourselves’.
Yes, I have felt these affirmations as lying to myself – but rather than be honest I saw others seemingly convinced and thought I must be doing it wrong or I was immune to them as they felt false.Not being able to ‘fake it until you make it’ led to a sense of hopelessnes. Life and me in it would continue to be miserable!
Being honest about how I felt about myself or the world has led to letting go of a lot of misery. I’ve discovered beneath every negative thought and emotion about myself I lie, delicate and untouched. Being honest has allowed me to see that these emotions and thoughts I had of myself were never me at all whereas when I tried to make them go away and paint over them with affirmations they always showed through – perhaps because they were actually ready to get out the door and not return.
This is a great description lorettarapp, ‘It feels like handing over my power to something, ideal or image.Unlike true affirmations or confirmation of truth by feeling it in the body.’ There is a very clear difference here, I have experienced both and know that just saying words over and over that I have read in a book or been told to say does not work.
Great point Elizabeth, the words are empty and to me affirmations were used to make me feel better about myself but never really addressed the lack of self worth – it’s no different than pretending to be happy but feeling miserable inside.
I love your comment Esther, especially this; ‘When we understand that nothing from the outside can confirm our own beauty and self-worth we will start looking deep into ourselves…’ And when we begin to unlock the beauty and vastness within then the outside world will begin to reflect what we have felt on the inside.
Great blog Cherise, and I totally agree; affirmations said in the head to ourselves don’t really go anywhere or have a lasting effect. Sure they can make you feel ‘good’ or somewhat inspired for moments, but unless it is lived they don’t mean much. I remember trying the affirmations diary and saying nice things to myself each day, but I never really believed them, they were just a formality, like I was being polite to myself. Now that I am moving through life with a body that knows it IS love, the words I express to myself come from inside and have purpose in confirming what I feel.
We hold so much beauty already in us. Needing those affirmations really is confirming that we are not full already. Because even though the words might say that “I am beautiful”, the energy I am in at that moment is saying: “I am ugly, therefore I need such an affirmation.”
The livingness of Love has been the one way of living that is Absolute in all that it does, says, thinks, and breathes so there has been no need of any affirmations to ‘pump’ myself up. Only when I was not living love did I seek words to make me feel better. Gone are the forced affirmations and hello to Appreciation of who I really am and they are the stark opposite in how you feel about yourself.
This is a beautiful example Kerstin, instead of trying to make you something that you think you should be you simply allow yourself to feel that what you are already and have been all along but haven’t really honoured it.
So true and beautifully expressed Esther.
Very true Emily, affirmation is yet another thing to do letting us crave for the day that we will have achieved. It may be a medication that seemingly gives us relief but does not let us understand that we are already enough.
True Esther, affirmations seem to be more about achieving and recognition. not truth and what one feels from their body.
Well said Matilda. The lived experience then becomes a confirmation of the choices we have made and an inspiration to continue appreciating and exploring the wisdom of our body.
And once we have lived it, felt it and experienced it we can always find a way back to it as we know it in our body.
Cherise thank you for writing on this topic of affirmations. Absolutely it feels like this word has been misused to make it all about self, see it as a motivational tool, or even just identify with a skill rather than seeing who we naturally are as an affirmation. You share here that a true affirmation is felt in our bodies, and that I absolutely agree with. For it it is lived in our bodies it can then be expressed in word, and not the other way around.
When we feel our bodies, truly feel them, then we first feel a lot of things that are not right but eventually notice that they are not us – we may have issues but they are not us. Underneath everything that is going on, there is the true ‘us’ and the amazing surprise is that this ‘us’ is love.
“I am love” and knowing this from our body. Stating it from the mind is not sufficient.
I agree, if we can’t feel it then the words are empty
Otherwise it is only half of it when spoken from the mind – like its asking the body to come along with what’s being said. And not a true knowing from deep within. We are so love.
I love this simple truth, ‘I am Love’ has been expanded right through to the Livingness in each and every movement – this is our purpose.
I agree Christoph, this too can be like an old worn out record if we do not make the choices that support us to know and live this without doubt.
Beautifully said Alex. Our words are empty when they lack the fullness of our love.
In an affirmation we either either confirm the All that we are, or the all that we are not.
The love we seek is the love we are. There is nothing to find, but everything to be.
That’s beautiful Liane. We seem to seek love in all the wrong places except the one place where we will find it… right inside ourselves. We can spend a lifetime looking outside of ourselves to obtain it from others…and yet there it just happens to be in our back pocket all the time. No doing, or obtaining just quietly there waiting for rediscovery.
I love this Liane … ‘There is nothing to find, but everything to be.’ It is worthy of a place on my fridge as a reminder to simply honour and be myself.
Beautifully wise and so simple Liane…. as affirmation is nothing more than an empty wish to be something we already are. Empty because it does not begin with the premise that ‘the love we seek is the love we are. ‘
A beautifully simple truth, Liane. When we finally come back to ourselves and accept that what we have longed for is eternally within us, we settle in the body and feel the absolute joy of deepening in our own love.
Beautiful and all so very true Cherise. From what you present it seems that we seek affirmations once we have lost touch with the love that we are. In order to reconnect we desperately seek outward for that which lies within. A true affirmation is living our love everyday in every way and through its expression we feel and know in full, the truth of who we are.
So beautifully said Liane. It’s so true. Why would we need affirmations if we already are in touch with our own love? We need affirmations when we feel lost. If we are in connection with ourselves, our bodies and the love that we are we do not need affirmations to lift us up or feel good about ourselves, as our sense of self-worth is naturally already there.
The greatest affirmation is living the love we innately are. A Beautiful blog to read Cherise.
Thank you Emma, I agree, it is essential to understand how we move. “Movements confirms our love” very true, and love is developed from the choice to align our bodies to the divinity we all come from, through our movements. So when we can move in a way that keeps us in that reconnection to the divine, this becomes our Livingness, which is true love. For more on the Livingness and love go to;
http://www.unimedliving.com/search?keyword=LIVINGNESS
It is the energetic intent behind affirmations that makes all the difference and the energy as everything is energy and ultimately every comes down to this and what energy are we choosing, that is one of love, of God ,of the divinity, of the universe we are all part of and are from or that of the astral plane living amongst us all. True appreciation comes from the divine and is confirmed to us constantly as we choose to live it every day in the quality of our very movements every moment..
Absolutely Alex, love is continually filling us with more love, which needs no words but is felt as a Livingness, which as a truth and presence that cannot be denied. As this is also a feeling of inner stillness, that brings a feeling of harmony, which is innately who we ‘all’ naturally are as Sons of God. Simple God is love, we are love, when love is lived it is felt as a Livingness, so simply appreciate we are love! For more on love go to;
http://www.unimedliving.com/voice/whats-on-in-the-world/when-you-say-i-love-you-does-it-come-with-love.html
“When the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us…”. I love how you start this last paragraph Cherise, it shows that if we keep it simple and make life truly about love all else will naturally fall into place.
I agree Judith and it takes one to surrender and trust to allow this to take place.
‘There can be great simplicity in the relationship with ourselves and this begins with knowing who we already are, from the very inside of our own bodies, within our hearts.’ I love this reminder of the power of self-acceptance and developing a relationships with our own true nature – Love.
What feels amazing Sarah is that when we don’t try or aren’t out to give ourselves a certain image in the world, things like “I feel fantastic!” and “I am SEXY” just come, and they are real!
perfectly put Rachel! The whole world is Lying to themselves, and trying to justify the “empty chasm” that exists, we are trying to make it work, but it isn’t.
And it is exhausting us Harrison.
It is our responsibility to accept that we are love first and foremost, equal, from God. Knowing this provides the foundation to live responsibility in our everyday.
Beautifully expressed Annie, I have found my solid foundation within me since meeting Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.
Yes you can’t shake a knowing in the body. There is an absoluteness to it.
Talking ourselves into believing something is a stark contrast to having that knowing in our bodies.
Yes Annie, it is a stark contrast, as is the difference in what each approach will offer in the end result. For many years I followed affirmations, and little if anything changed. I have not used this approach now for 15 years and my life has changed enormously. Understanding the difference and beginning from the premise that we are everything already, has completely eliminated the need to try to reach for something. This actually undercuts the entire basis for the spiritual new age. Affirmations are but the tip of that iceberg, and from my experience, just as unhelpful when it comes to any true and sustainable change.
Beautifully said Greg. We are all equally the Sons of God.
Amazing Matthew! Deep down we know we aren’t anger, sadness or any other emotion, we know we are pure light. When we grow up that’s what we are taught, that sadness is opposite to happiness, and that calmness is opposite to aggression. What we aren’t taught is that these are all forms of energy and they are choices, we can choose to be who we ARE, or there is also a choice for emotions, which are destructive.
Accepting that ‘I am love’ already before I do anything changes the need to strive to prove or better myself.
So beautifully expressed Elizabeth, so much is said with words, with them and without them.
Sometimes all words do is get in the way of what is being expressed on a much much deeper level. I notice this with my eyes too… If I get caught with the image and what my eyes are receiving, it stops me from feeling what is there to be felt.
To me, affirmations are like hope, whereas appreciation for what I have is a substantial truth.
So simply and succinctly summed up Alexis: “appreciation confirms what is already there and affirmations are simply what we wish was there.”
I love what you have said here Rosie, it is about dropping the pictures and images we hold of how our lives should be and when we do, we can feel the potential of everything that is on offer.
and not only that, when we let go of the time factor it is amazing what can unfold and present itself to us.
‘ Affirmations are like ‘give me everything on a plate but I don’t want to truly see and feel everything there is!’ They are baseless.’ I think you have really summed it up here Vicky!
Agreed! Yes I’ve tried ‘the give me everything on a plate approach’ and it definitely does not work, but it gives a sense that at least I’m doing something that maybe one day will make a difference. In fact for me they were just a distraction, a delay tactic to avoid feeling and seeing what needed to be dealt with.
When we accept “that the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us” and we confirm this truth by the way we choose to be, there is no need for any affirmations.
Oh my goodness – I had shelves filled with those books – none of them truly helped until I came across the ‘Purple Books’ and their author, Serge Benhayon. Even now, I can hear beautiful statements about us but, until I can fully embody them, they remain just that, statements, not a way of living. For me cutting the incessant internal dialogue that tells me I’m not enough and I’m not doing enough is a good start. Simply being aware of and cutting the awful way I criticise myself and instead allowing little drops of appreciation to filter in, is a basic action that, when done every day, helps me to embody the beautiful truth – that I AM enough. I need to appreciate where I am at and how far I have come and to continue by making choices to nurture and care for my body so that it can do all that it needs to do in this lifetime.
My experience with affirmations is that you can use the mind to convince yourself over and over of pretty much anything at the expense of your inner wisdom and knowing and use the mind to override the body’s loud messages to us of truth…the body however doesn’t miraculously become the affirmed belief, ideal or picture we choose to hold for our bodies live every one of our choices and never do they hide the truth from us of where we are at and how we are living. We may say we are Love but if we don’t live the Love we are, the body too will reflect this clearly.
We need not assure ourselves of anything when we live in the knowing of who we are. Living the Love we are, our natural essence confirms us over and over again.
A knowing within every particle of our being.
Absolutely Doug we are all equal it is as simple as that.
Thanks Julie, we can all benefit from the teaching and presentations by Serge Benhayon. When we align to the truth, which is we are all equally the Sons of God, life is simpler.
Many years ago, I used affirmations a lot…and I mean a lot. But all along, they were just rattling around in my head, without an invitation for my body to join in. And so, the way affirmations are used, is a way of keeping people in their thoughts and in their heads, and quite disconnected from their feelings, and they are based on what you want to become, therefore confirming that you don’t already feel that you are everything.
Beautifully expressed Cherise, making it very clear that saying affirmations without feeling the truth of them in our bodies first is yet another way of goal achieving and having an ideal, whereas taking the time and space to feel what is deep inside us in our essence — and that is love – enables the affirmations and appreciation of all that we are to flow from there and be expressed openly and to all, not just to ourselves in our heads.
If it isn’t felt then it doesn’t stick. That’s my motto. Over and over I have had to tell myself the same thing. Zillions of times. Whilst it may stick for a while, it can always be blown away by doubt, someone else’s words or whatever. But once it is actually felt in the body then it becomes an accepted truth. A truth on which I can then build and move.
“…Could it be that our number one and true affirmation is that we are love?…” What a great affirmation to start with…
Thank you Cherise. Many years ago I tried using affirmations just as you described for support. Looking back I can see that these affirmations were like elastoplast I would use to cover over my lack of self worth, my anxiety and my very chaotic lifestyle. For a brief spell I would think all was well – on the surface there was an apparent calm whilst underneath the emotions wreaked havoc. There was no lasting support and when the plaster fell off things always felt worse than they had before. Learning to connect to my body and the loveliness within has been a very different path, one that has brought lasting change and one from which confirmation of the love that I am is easily accessible without an elastoplast in sight.
“the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us,” It’s crazy really when you think about it, we are running around everywhere, a little bit like headless chickens, looking for love when all along we just need to stop, and it’s there. It makes me think of a cartoon with a person running down the street with this huge big love heart right behind them, never going away. There is no escaping the fact that we are love, and everything is supporting us to be that love, from beautiful sunrise to a sprained ankle.
I do whole-heartedly agree that “all anyone ever truly wants is to be love and to be loved”.
I love feeling within me, confirming to myself very regularly throughout the day that I am Love, Cherise, not from knowledge but from what I feel inside in my heart. So when sometimes things go wrong, as they can do, I know it was an energy that was not me, and do my best not to get caught up, but simply let it go. It’s not surprising you should write this blog to cherish from your heart, Cherise.
No matter how much someone says something – if they are not living it it’s not true. Every cell of our body can sniff out whats not truth and can tell a mile off when someone’s living a lie. It’s whether we choose to buy into it for our own comfort or not. There are many so called gurus or new age health people that have turned out to be nothing more than cons – in the sense living a vast difference, drugs, drink, abuse – from what they ‘healthy so called perfect image’ they present on stage or in books. Serge Benhayon is not one of these people. He is the only person I have ever met who lives with absolute transparency – everything he lives, is what he presents – they are one and the same, there is no difference and no affirmations in sight – only the absolute livingness 24/7 of love, truth, integrity, commitment, dedication, purpose and service for humanity.
This is super power-full. No doubt about that. Affirmation is gold when truly spoken from our hearts. It helps us to be more real, down to earth and actually enjoy living life once again. Self-Critique, self-judgement, issues, tensions and dramas all are created to get in the way of this simple affirmation and joy-full living way. Shows how simple living life truly can be and how complex we have all made it
“With the choice to stop and to feel who we are, in our own bodies, in this very moment, is it possible that all anyone ever truly wants is to be love and to be loved?”
Today there is much mistrust & cynicism around the word love and I can understand why. For we have put great emphasis into the word, the expression, the doing of it but what Serge Benhayon has clearly pointed out, is that love cannot have any real & true depth if we are not first committed to self love and hence live and express the enormity of the love that comes from within.
Thank you Cherise for a blog with a powerful message for everyone that “the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us”.We definitely can’t use this fact as an affirmation either – I have tried! The fact that we are love definitely has to be lived through our body and the choices we make.
It’s interesting as it reminds me of something which is happening across many primary schools, which kids are given what you could call affirmations to support them in not seeing mistakes as a bad thing – but what’s interesting to watch is, that what is being said does not match what is being expressed through their body – their bodies are saying very different things.
I have actually seen this in adults too, and I was once one of them, seeking all these new age. self help, yoga and health books. I might have been saying all this so called ‘ great’ stuff but my body and life was a mess. I was totally caught in the illusion and very much the arrogance of I was better than everyone else.
Gorgeous Cherise. As you share we cannot drill into our minds that we are ‘worthy’ and ‘amazing’ through repeating the words of others; no matter how many magnets there are on our fridge it comes down to whether or not we understand that there is something pretty special inside of us, and if we can appreciate this fact.
Exactly Emily! We haven’t been taught to appreciate our natural selves. The “feel good lines” are nothing compared to the awesomeness that a person already is.
Absolutely Emily, and no matter how much we try to manipulate or push others into saying the right things and confirming our ideals and beliefs, everyone has their own expressions and it’s impossible that they will act in a way that exactly mirrors our expectations.
Appreciation is certainly key and I agree, no amount of mantras on cereal packets, magnets on fridges and affirmation calendar messages will deliver us unto the Love we are if we do not accept the fact and Live its way.
Thank you Cherise, I know that ‘telling ourselves’ or anyone else for that matter is not loving or supportive for our body. Being told, is one of the worst things you can do, it’s deeply damaging on many levels, dishonoring and lessening of a person and their sensitivity. It’s basically saying we are not good enough as we are, or that we don’t know any better – which is far from truth. As inside everyone of us is a place of pure, unequivocal divine wisdom and love.
Accepting we are love and choosing to confirm that in all we do completely changes our internal dialogue and replaces the need for affirmations.
Well said Helen – Accepting we are Love and embodying the Love we are is IT. We need only Live and deepen our Love, not wish it or think it with our minds.
This is a great point Cherise, ‘Our bodies know when something feels hot or cold, good or bad, and so they definitely know when words are just words and are not truly felt or lived in full – when they are not a part of our Livingness.’ In the past I have tried saying ‘positive affirmations’ I would try in the mirror, but this always felt strange and never truly changed how I felt about myself, I always felt like I was trying to achieve something that I did not already have, the presentations of Serge Benhayon have supported me to feel that I am already love, and that I am already enough.
Thank You Cherise for this blog, what you’ve shared here is that we are not bound and held by our minds and the chatter that is non-stop for I would say almost everyone on the planet. When we make the choice to reconnect to our bodies there is a different language that often I have found needs very few words. Sometimes one word or even none, just a feeling that later expands out into words.
I’ve had the desire to buy a few self help books over the years, but now I understand and can appreciate that to love myself is something only I can trigger for myself, and it is actually quite an easy switch to flick, it just requires a commitment to not accepting all the muck that gets in the way of knowing I am enough and have lived with this love before. When we know we have this love inside of us then it is much easier to see that this is where we can easily return to living.
Cherise I feel you are spot on where affirmations are concerned. In the past I tried them to no avail and as we are love within already, we do just need to acknowledge this and be in the livingness of this truth. Something we all need to be reminded of as children, so that we grow up with this truth.
When we use affirmations to achieve or gain something they are endeavours to counter beliefs we already hold rather than confirmations. Therefore they are ‘lies we tell ourselves’.
‘that we are already everything – that we are already enough’. I am just deeply appreciating this knowing….
Years ago when I smoked, there was a new drug that was meant to help people stop smoking but was by prescription only. I went to my doctor to try this new method and he told me he refused to prescribe it because people smoked ‘because they choose to’. Not being love was also something I chose not to do. The great thing about choices is there is always time to make new ones. Smoking for a long time can and does have lasting affects but you can choose to quit so you don’t compound these problems, being love is always the same when you come back to it waiting patiently, no matter how hard you chose to ignore it.
Steve, what a wonderful Doctor! and love your sentiment, ” being love is always the same when you come back to it waiting patiently, no matter how hard you chose to ignore it” This is heart warming.
The ultimate patient is Love’s Limitless patience.
Some years back I tried to p practise positive affirmations but nothing really changed in my life, because it felt like it was based on wanting to be someone or something better than what I was currently experiencing. At best it is a bandaid.
I agree Katerina – Our knowing and our bodies lived wisdom are a powerhouse couple.
Thanks Julie, we can all benefit from the teaching and presentations by Serge Benhayon. When we align to the truth, which is, we are all equally the Sons of God, a life lived in this truth / love becomes much simpler with no “bandaids”.
Affirming as you mention doesnt really work, it is just a repetition of something we know.. which always feels empty as this “something” that we don’t, but we are trying so hard to make ourselves believe. In living and through this knowing that we are love, then it changes and makes total sense. It isn’t about the mental knowing, but feeling it in our bodies that we already have everything we need, which is the quality and energy of love.
Beautiful Cherise. When we connect to and feel the love of our essence we know where we come from, who we are and where we are returning to and we know we are already everything as we are a part of the everything that is God.
Wow I love this. True affirmation is the confirmation of knowing we are love through the choices we make every moment of the day.
Lieke this says it all for me too ‘True affirmation is the confirmation of knowing we are love through the choices we make every moment of the day.’
Me too – making a living way about the truth which is felt and known inside – we are love.
I have bought countless self-help books and many that have included affirmations. My experience has been that within minutes of reading or saying the phrase, it was forgotten and I was back to living the way I normally did. My learning has brought me to the understanding that it’s no good just saying the words. There has to be an action, and an ongoing commitment to a loving way of being that makes the real change. As you share Cherise its about the way we chose to live.
Yes Cherise. I was on a training course the other day and we got asked the question, ‘who do you talk to the most?’ I said my husband, others said friends, work colleagues etc, but actually we have an ongoing dialogue going on in our head almost every moment of our day. It makes sense that we should become close observers of what we say to ourselves. It has a huge impact on how we feel.
Beautiful Cherise. Choosing to feel and be the love that we are is all the affirming required. When we connect to our body and to our inner-most place of being, there is no need for bits of paper stuck on the fridge to tell us something that we already feel as our truth.
Yes, Cherise, I too went through the affirmations stage without ever finding that they brought me love, joy, help or anything of positive worth at all. They were supposedly the shining stars of the spiritual days, according to many of the books and talks of the gurus of those days, whose names I shall not bother to mention, and on whom I wasted a great deal of money. Fortunately I found Serge Benhayon and his Universal Medicine many years ago and learnt the beautiful truth that real love is available to us all at all times, free of charge, simply by connecting to the love inside us. What a joy and what a relief this is.
“the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us”. Yes, yes – how crazy is it that we have forgotten this and are not taught this as an essential guide to life.
I agree Sue. We are living in a world where people desperately seeking love and are destroying themselves by looking for it outside of themselves. “the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us”- this changes everything.
Thank you Cherise for providing this understanding on affirmations. The way that affirmations have been spoken about in the past has never made sense to me. Your definition of an affirmation deeply resonates with me – “What if a true affirmation was actually something that was felt in our own bodies, already known absolutely and just simply remembered as a configuration within our every living cell: that we are already everything – that we are already enough.” An affirmation then is something that is used to confirm what is already known and not just some wishful thinking.
Beautifully explained Elizabeth.. Makes much more sense than any definition so far – as, darn, to me this definition is actually resonating a deep truth within my body that what is shared about affirmations is absolute truth.
And so what is shared in this blog is : life, what life is all about: the love we are is simply a fact that already lives inside us. So our only job is to come back to that love and let it out all the way – in our daily living, with each other – we will find our way back and so who we are. In our own pace.
This is beautiful Cherise, especially the last paragraph brought to me a real clear revelation that is; we are love in essence love in our inside, but yet we have living body and being that seemingly is not living knowing that it is all of that love. So life teaches us that when we confirm this essence, this love, we are able to make love our everything so from inside fully out , an expression from our body – and so our living way (livingness).
And that the truth is, that not only does our body know this truth, but the driver of this body (which I know is our spirit) has had its hands full driving the body in a way that is not in regard to the body’s natural laws – and hence the disregard and illness and disease the body is in, which had to be brought up in order to clear itself – so it is our driver (spirit) we have to discipline to be simply loving again – something it has not done for quite some time – but, deep down, it knows inside out. Re-learning is everything. And so, by re-connecting to our body’s truth.
It is indeed a process of re-learning – it is not new to us. Our bodies know love, they know how to move in a loving way – so much so that they bring up illness and disease to correct the fact we have not moved with love. That is awesome and a deep confirmation of what love we are.
Cherise, so true, we can keep repeating words but it is only in knowing and feeling it by living it that it becomes a lived truth that emanates as the Light and Love we are.
Yes Susan, the reciting of words do not change anything only gives our power away to what is outside of us. The truth is that the Beauty is already within and so it is up to us to claim and live it.
‘ is it possible that all anyone ever truly wants is to be love and to be loved?’ When I feel this question in my body my body lets go of the tension I hold it in in my drive to succeed, my drive to better myself, to try, to struggle. Could life be this simple? Could I let go of all my many hours of pushing/punishing myself to get somewhere when actually I was here all along; I had not wanted to feel this after opting for recognition over love.
What is beautiful is I can explore letting go of complications and living from love again. That’s not to shy away from the practicalities of life but to know that they are practicalities and not the means of getting love. Love comes from who you are and feeling this is what expresses love through the what you dos.
I can not truly think or affirm me into something great. As hard or seemingly lovingly I may try it – it will never last or be enough. That’s because I try to become like something I imagine it would great to be. But as you said Cherise, we ARE already. And in fact we are more vessels for energy then anything else and so we choose what is coming through us, but not controlling it. But one energy we belong to and the other is an creation that ‘tries to be’. And so we are either surrendering to what we belong to or run after a goal we never will reach, because there is no truth in it.
The biggest and oldest illusion of all that we have been sold, is to search on the outside for solutions when all the love and answers are found within, how mad is that? But we all fall for it.
Is completely mad Kevmchardy, I agree, and now the only thing I am falling for is truth and then greatly appreciating when that truth is delivered and felt in my body.
To say no to and drop that illusion will bring out the love which was there all the time.
Indeed kevmchardy it seems we have trained our eyes to see all that we are not, yet the wonder of these receptors is their power to read and confirm all that we know to be true.
It was sold to us. And we bought it. Hook, line and sinker. It’s important to me to remember this – because as did I choose to buy into this illusion, then so to do I also have the absolute choice not to. Remembering that is very empowering.
Yes Kevin, a big one! Something we all fall for, we have everything we ever need inside us! The solutions are not out there, they come first from connecting with ourselves. Often when I do this I found that its so important to even fix things, but to just go “phew I know the truth”
These affirmations are just like sticky labels we stick on top of us and hope will keep everything sweet. Rather than adding in ‘positive’ things, your words remind me Cherise, how life shows us that actually it is the beliefs, ideals and pictures we carry around that obscure the divine beauty that lives underneath.
Knowing we are already everything we need to be, make affirmations redundant. Affirmations keep us imagining we are small, and constantly trying to affirm something about ourselves, from the outside in the way of your ‘sticky labels’ Joseph. When we go beyond ideals and beliefs and connect to our deepest divinity no more is needed.
So true Joseph, so often these affirmations are gathered from the outside, a collective bundle of aspirations that we continuously strive towards yet are ultimately unfulfilling because they have not been impulsed from within.
Cherise there is true wisdom in the sentence “There can be great simplicity in the relationship with ourselves and this begins with knowing who we already are, from the very inside of our bodies, and in our hearts.” Once known we need look no further for answers or information … that only complicates the journey away from who we already are.
Love is often an affirmation issued by one person to another one as in I love you. Yet, in truth love is what we are, we are love. So, establishing a relationship with love cannot but start with oneself.
Very true. We cannot love another without knowing and being love ourselves.
An affirmation is like an oil slick that floats on the surface, it never truly becomes part of the consistency of the water. The water is already all it needs to be – the essence of Love. We are the water, we are the love and all we need to do is claim it. Thank you Cherise for claiming the love you are from within and living this in the world.
ch1956 affirmations never become part of us, but are ‘ like an oil slick that sits on the surface’ What you says is beautiful ‘ the water is already all it needs to be – the essence of love.’
I like your analogy ch1956, the oil slick a mere superficial film whereas the waters potential depth is oceanic.
Beautifully expressed – i agree that affirmations are superficial and stand out a mile when they are not lived and therefore not equal in quality to the vessel receiving them.
What an awesome description, Christine. You nailed it.
Thank you Cherise, I was never able to do affirmations as they always left me feeling empty and to be honest… worse. Words are pointless if the energy we say or write them in is the opposite of what the words portray. I could tell myself I am beautiful 100 times but if I say this in an energy believing I am ugly this is what I will falsely confirm. We can confirm what is true when we allow ourselves to feel that we are the love we seek.
So true it is going through the motions and often feeling you have failed at yet another thing that is supposed to help you rather than connecting to the love we truly are and appreciating that.
Absolutely Leonne, we are the love we seek. When I read this I could feel my shoulders dropping and an ease return to my body.
I agree that affirmations fall way short, they don’t capture your essence and so it feels shallow and doesn’t honour the depth of who you are and what you bring.
Bingo Leonne. Kids are brilliant barometers for this. Say something to them without truth behind it and it falls on deaf ears. So, if they can discern – then so can we all. Kids play.
I agree Cherise, affirmations are one thing but appreciating and confirming who we are and what we bring is a completely different level. Affirmations for me largely are based on the outside and external influences whereas appreciation and confirmation is based on our bodies and is deeply felt. We are love and by deeply feeling and appreciating this fact my body knows it, so it is not a mind thing.
Said so perfectly, James!
Thank you Lee, the more I appreciate who I am and what I bring the more I find there is to appreciate about myself but also others. It makes a huge difference to the way I used to live, which was finding fault with myself and everyone else!
Well said Nicola, “we already are far more magnificent than we can even imagine”. That is something important to remember especially when we are feeling down.
The more we focus on our inner being and stop worrying about outside forces and influences the stronger we will become within ourselves. As I have experienced as a result of Universal Medicine I am now far more confident, not because I know more, but because of the steadiness I now hold within my body, something I lacked before. I have a marker to go back to, something I know. Whereas when I look to the outside it will tell me whatever I want it to good or bad depending on what I am wanting to see.
I agree Jade, it the solidness of appreciation and confirmation which I find the most supportive. It grounds what we already know and feel and makes it more tangible. It is not about bringing anything new or trying to be more rather appreciating and confirming all that we already are.
Great to know at all times because even at a so called high point, there is always so much more and that more is not outside of ourselves!
In my experience we can’t actually “control” anything, but we can choose to surrender to ourselves and the grandness of our essence.
Well said Nikki, and how strange that we try to be more than we are when we have not even touched on the ALL that we all already are!
Beautifully said Nicola. There can be a focus and so much effort put into being more, but what a distraction away from what we are already. Who we are already is what is worthy of our focus.
Thank you Jenny, most of my life I have tried to think my way out of situations and think my way into becoming a certain way but it has never worked. It has only been since starting to truly listen to my body that I have felt the love that I am and have always been. Seeing life from my body makes it very straight forward and simple, for me it sees things as black or white, as love or not love, and so the choices I make are now much clearer.
That is great to hear Katerina. I find, like you, that the more I appreciate myself and what I bring the more my movements support me to feel this and to deepen it. I have found that it is amazing how the way I move can deeply effect the way I am feeling.
Great point Nikki, by seeking something from outside of us confirms that we are not enough, whereas when we appreciate and confirm we accept that we are already divine.
We are what we align to. We are living as we were thinking individuals and in this illusion we are longing for the confirmation of the individual. When we live as the vessels of energy we are we will stop looking for the individual recognition and live a life of responsibility of our own choices. The appreciation is then about what we have chosen as we know that we are not the initiator or creator of anything, but the mere vessels of the energy we have chosen.
Spot on Rachelandras; ‘ The appreciation is then about what we have chosen as we know that we are not the initiator or creator of anything, but the mere vessels of the energy we have chosen’.
Affirmation comes from the Latin affirmationem “solid assurance.” The truth is that we have a solid assurance of something only when we felt it in our body in a clear and distinctive way. Only then we KNOW.
Absolutely Eduardo, the ease with which something is lived and expressed through our bodies is what makes it truly accessible and tangible for all.
When we feel love for another it confirms that equal love in ourselves, and when we feel and know that love in ourselves it also affirms in another.
I have tried the affirmation thing, it never sticks because you never fully believe it, you feel the tokenism of all that stuff.
Nice knowledge Eduardo – like that!! Thanks.
Yes Eduardo. A knowing from what we feel and live rather than a knowing just from knowledge.
Correct Eduardo. Once lived we have the authority of knowing absolutely on all levels.