The Big Picture of Saying No to the Small Print

These days just getting a new e-mail account comes with reams of terms, which realistically, most of us in our exhaustion, apathy and acceptance of how ridiculous it has become, just sign without reading it all: but recently, I had a different experience. We just got a new insurance company to cover our new-to-us car.

I set up the coverage and paid for six months on the phone. Two weeks later I got the official ’application package’ where I was to put my signature in all the right places – but there was a clause in there which had not been mentioned before I started the policy with the payment.

The Small Print

I was to sign to allow myself to be a target for the worst kind of telemarketing. It said I did not have to sign but “…in order to complete the purchase and ensure the rate and effectiveness of the client’s desired insurance coverage…” they would need permission for the telemarketing… so basically, they were saying that if I did not sign, my premium would increase (as much as they wanted to increase it) and there would be no guarantee that they would take care of me if anything happened which is not a clause I wanted to accept, so I took a moment to consider my choices and feel what to do.

The Choice

I could do the easy thing and choose to compromise my own sense of what is right in order to sign it, keep my cheap rate and go about my life – but in doing so knowing I was allowing another big company to get away with ‘business-as-usual,’ in other words – bullying, blackmail and the oppression and abuse of many people for the profit of a few – or I could just deal with it and say “No.”

I was tired and I had lots of other things that felt important for me to take care of, but I could not sign (agree) to this and let accountability ‘slide’.

In my cancellation letter, I included my reason why. They still wanted to charge a $50 cancellation fee but I explained that when I agreed to the policy, they had not disclosed this stipulation. Six phone calls and over an hour of being on hold later, they waived the fee. The fourth representative was genuinely caring – she got me to an advisor and she made sure the fee was waived.

Throughout those phone calls I kept coming back to who I am by breathing gently and bringing my awareness to my body (so I would not slip into my old patterns of frustration) and I actually felt how lovely it was to be me and to be on the line with other human beings and that was beautiful. I found another company, more expensive, but worth every penny.

The Big Picture

Through the teachings of Universal Medicine, and as a result of being inspired to develop more and more self-care and love for myself and to take responsibility for all my choices, I have realised that everything is an opportunity to learn, understand and connect with myself and others.

Had I not had the role models and the support of people who are walking the talk, I’m sure I would still be missing these beautiful opportunities to deepen this love for myself, others and life on the whole and would still be struggling in an existence that previously made little sense to all that I feel inside. Had I not known people who are truly adhering to the deepest integrity found within us all (living in accordance to our inner most essence), I know I would still be contributing to my own un-wellness and to that which does not feel right to me about how we live in the world.

If we think we are safe or protected because we don’t live under a dictatorship, we need to look around. If we think we can sit back and expect to be treated with respect and fairness, because ‘we have democracy’ or money or a job or whatever… we need to look again and ask ourselves “What if life is about learning to take deeper levels of individual responsibility than what we have been doing?”

Corruption and oppression will continue to reign from corporations to the people and between people on personal levels all around the world for as long as we go along with it.

I am not advocating any mission, agenda or revolt, however I feel a responsibility to not allow abuse that I am aware of (including self abuse) to go un-named. I feel that when I accept less than respect, it is a loss for everyone, as this gives the world the message that we can do business or ‘get by’ at the expense of our humanity.

Coldness, separatism, oppression and harm will continue between people unabated until we claim that there is another way and live to show this other way by not leaving what we truly feel out of the equation in anything we do. In other words we can and will make a True difference when we no longer compromise on what we know is true for us all in order to stay in a form of social comfort.

I have drawn immense inspiration and support from Serge Benhayon and my practitioner Bina Pattel, who are living this other way by openly being and expressing from the fullness of who they are.

By Jo Elmer- Concord, CA USA

Further Reading:
The Importance of Expressing Truth
What Happens When We Do Not Speak Up?

664 thoughts on “The Big Picture of Saying No to the Small Print

  1. What you show here Jo is the blatant corruption and abuse of offering a service that is not interested in the people and insuring that they are looked after should something go wrong, all they are interested in themselves and the most they can make out of their customers. This is a new level of marketing bullying I have not heard of before, and the more people that sign to this the more this will then become the acceptable practice. Great that you stood up and said no to their abusive behaviour

    1. Yes Alison, the many heartless policies we complain about exist because we have been complacent consumers accepting the unacceptable.

      This will start to change when we start saying no and talking about stuff that does not feel right.

      1. Well said Alison and Jo – life is all about people and it is up to people to claim it so.

      2. Yes I am really learning that we can not let anything go that does not feel true. Many of us have been complacent in allowing things to slip and dismiss things rather than questioning their integrity. When we collectively speak up it really does make a difference and it supports others to see the corruption and lies we are often blind to.

  2. To save a few bob but to lose yourself would be a very sad decision Jo. Not losing ourselves and our values feels the most important thing to learn here, everything is connected.

  3. We are bullied in so many different ways, so much so that we often don’t even realise it. Exposing abuse for what it is asks for something greater than what is currently being offered.

  4. We are very sensitive beings and can therefore register abuse very easily in our bodies. If we are living in any way less than the glorious beings that we all are then we are at some level allowing abuse in our lives. The only true way to live without abuse is to live the love that we naturally are.

  5. Thanks Jo… there is a lot of small print going on isn’t there… It’s all around us and we do need to take note… imagine if we knew the small print that came with every politician , with every bank, with every policy, indeed with every so called health food ( lets get lateral!)

    1. hmmm… if we knew the small print behind every politician, policy, product etc.. we may realize that in order to eat and live with a clear conscience we need to change how we are all doing things, change ourselves and rebuild society with the integrity of True love.

  6. Reading this I am reminded that saying yes to either what is love or what is not, I will get way more than what is seemingly superficially on offer. So saying yes to love the universe is given to me. And saying yes to what is not love brings through all that will destroy and harm who I truly am and those around me.

  7. There is too much of this manipulation and bullying going on and if we don’t stand up to it it will just increase. We are selling out if we do not bring attention to these things and refuse to take part in them.

  8. I have come across this blog this morning and interestingly it has been no coincidence as the last few weeks this has been a big part of what I have been learning. It is so easy to brush aside what we know and feel is not true in order to not rock the boat or cause waves but what in the long run does this do to impact how we accept one another and the levels of integrity we bring to the all?

  9. The article is a great reminder of the fact that we slide things to not rock the boat, be nice and get on with life without taking responsibility. It starts from small and becomes a norm and plays out in our life and others too as we have become part of the norm. Thank you for sharing!

  10. It is amazing to read that a company thinks it’s ok to slip such imposing conditions in under the fine print. Yet I am sure it is representative of what goes on in business these days. We have been manipulated by advertising for decades but now the manipulation is hitting our pockets, in the form of bribery. I must admit I generally do not read fine print, so I am just the sort of person that companies rely on to not question their terms and allow the abuse to continue.

  11. It is true that it is we, the users of our systems perpetuate demand for such, in our complicit acceptance of the corruption we are dished out on a daily basis. It is well worth considering what will happen if corruption, greed and bullying is no longer tolerated by the people.

  12. This is a very necessary message Jo that you are expressing in this blog, one that all of humanity needs to adhere to: say NO to any abuse including self-abuse

  13. This reminds me of that saying that the ‘devil is in the detail’…. but then equally god is in the detail as well. So the important lesson is to pay attention to the detail cause there is alot going on there!

  14. How often do I compromise a situation because I’m too tired, too busy. It might be just a little, a nudge to the left so to speak. But no matter how small I end up diminished from it rather than supported. In the end that does not serve me, and provides no feedback to the supplier on what is true and not true. So all around a very poor compromise.

  15. This is a great service to humanity Jo to not let abuse go un named, any form, rather than just going with what may seem the easy route. We can all feel and know what feels true and if we were to all to take responsibility and act on it as you have the tides would change on the abuse that is rife in our world.

  16. Thank you Jo. It is invigorating to read a blog like this and to know that there are people in the world who want to stand up for truth. Everything that we do matters and makes a different to the world at large.

  17. An inner commitment to removal of abuse in all its forms is a daily development. It requires no self-judgement and a path of understanding more and more of what abuse really is. Imagine if even 10% of the world committed to such a path… would that change the world forever?

  18. ” I have realised that everything is an opportunity to learn , understanding and connect with myself and others ”
    This is a great realisation for once you live this anything life throws at you will never be a stumbling block , thank you Jo

  19. The small print, which never truly is that small, is always worth paying close attention to. If not, ift will have to come around again, so it is actually seen.

  20. What has become evident is that there are many terms and conditions sometimes not even scribed that we behave to – like how we can be at work, how we have to be walking in the shops, how we should be with guests over – this small print is everywhere.

  21. If only we realised the true imprisonment and crippling judgement we live with when we let our spirit run the show, we would never ever consider ourselves free, or at liberty – but realise we are simply vehicles of energy and there is only one source of loving energy we can align to and that is Love. Thank you Jo for this beautiful blog.

  22. ‘I feel that when I accept less than respect, it is a loss for everyone, as this gives the world the message that we can do business or ‘get by’ at the expense of our humanity.’ True Jo, we need to have at least respect in all our relationships.

  23. Our livingness directly affects the life we live and what comes to us. Your example of holding yourself and choosing an insurance that equals the love you have for yourself has shown that it is possible for this to be the way we live. Holding ourselves and deeply respecting ourselves in all transactions means this will be felt by those around us and will confirm what is true.

  24. The small print is found all over the place and the beauty of our skills of awareness and reading can support us to feel what is true and what is dishonouring of who we are. Standing up for truth in all facets of our lives shows us how far we are willing to go to choose a more loving way to live life and how amazing it is to stand up and be honest with how we feel. An awesome blog thank you.

  25. Brilliant Jo – I appreciate the paralells you have drawn between our everyday decisions and the quality of world we live in. It’s like we will do anything to try to ignore the vital part we have to play. If we push away things that don’t feel right it’s only matter of time till we see that small things are big things actually.

  26. Most people would brush this off as normal and expected. Standing up and saying no is an immense service not just to yourself but to everyone – it is these ‘normal’ ways of behaving that have no respect or care for people that when called out, pave the way and space for deep respect and care for ourselves and each other.

  27. Funny as I was reading the start of your blog it occurred to how many “terms” we sign up and accept without discerning and these are not just written contracts but energetic ones too. In most cases if we really knew what we were getting we would run a mile, and yet if we were more responsible and discerning we would know what we were getting and not sign in the first place.

  28. Every day we are given the gift of gaining more awareness. We can either brush off the constant awareness we receive to stay in what is familiar or we can challenge ourselves to be the constant explorer, finding nuggets of gold everywhere.

  29. ‘I feel that when I accept less than respect, it is a loss for everyone’, When we allow ourselves to be treated without respect we are basically allowing abuse and to let this go without calling it out is irresponsible and care-less, a giving up on humanity at large.

  30. Knowing we have compromised always hurts. It may seem like we get away with it initially, but something always happens to remind us of our choices.

  31. I am amazed at the blatant and corrupt way the insurance company bullied their customers into signing such an agreement. In the UK we have a 14 day cooling off period where you can cancel agreement if it does not suit without any cost. The fact that you had to fight not to be charged is crazy but shows the bullying tactics that many fall for and become fearful to get out of. I feel this company should be reported to the ombudsman if you have such a procedure in the US.

  32. This is a wonderfully inspiring blog because it asks us to go that extra mile and not just accept things at face value. This then takes us to that deeper level of responsibility spoken about in the blog.

  33. I love this. I recently know someone who was going to sign a contract with a large company. The terms in the contract were hideous. They had the choice to walk away or to say something. They said something and what transpired was that the company itself was a bit shocked at how bad the terms were and looked at getting them changed. This person taking the time to read the contract with a fine tooth comb benefited everyone – not just themselves and what they were entering into but also anyone else who had signed the contract, those who would in the future and in my eyes it lifted the integrity of the company itself.

  34. This is important to be aware of, because all those documents and policies can often be created without human connection in mind, and so by bringing up this point to the company you are reminding them of their place in the world amongst us all.

  35. I’m experiencing how empowering it is just to say ‘no’ to what doesn’t feel right wherever I go, or lovingly share my observations and reflections in those public services that are not properly offered. I feel that I do it for myself and also for others to come, and this is a service in itself. Maybe I ‘suffer’ an incident, but other people will benefit later with my rectification… and this is huge!

  36. The importance of life is about people which the world is made up of and the honouring of this with each other is such an innate natural loving way for us to be yet the world is made up of abuse and disregard of us all and this is something greatly called here to contemplate on and see our role in this with the ripple effect and bigger picture.

  37. “I feel that when I accept less than respect, it is a loss for everyone”. We are all so connected, and much more than we can possibly comprehend with the human mind. What effects one, effects us all. (or is that affects, I always get confused 🙂 ).

  38. A beautiful sharing Jo, I love how you were open to the situation being an opportunity to connect to people rather than allowing emotions like frustration to get the better of you. In this way the situation didn’t ‘own’ you which otherwise would have brought you down…

  39. ‘In other words we can and will make a True difference when we no longer compromise on what we know is true for us all in order to stay in a form of social comfort’ Yes it is far too easy to let things slide and before we know it we have a tsunami to deal with..

  40. Where we currently stand is the sum total of the movements we have put in place to get there. Therefore it is wise to pay attention to every tiny detail but also remain astute that we can lose ourselves in the seeming complexity of this in order to avoid panning out and seeing how it all fits together in the big picture of life.

  41. Thank you Jo. You’ve helped me to see how important it is to submit a fraud report to police after somebody stole from me recently. Everything we do counts – even if it may seem pointless it isn’t.

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