823 thoughts on “What Happens When We Do Not Speak Up?”

1. it makes an extraordinary difference when just one person speaks up… Just imagine what would happen if this became the way it is.

2. We always have a choice as you highlighted in this article, truth or not, ‘I can start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside,
   OR
   I can continue to play the social game – the well-oiled machine of my beautiful manners, well-rehearsed small talk and polite pleasantries.’ We know and can feel how horrible the later choice is, the world needs truth all the time.

3. Expressing in our fullness all the time needs to be foundational in our lives, and is something I am choosing to embrace.

4. Our silence is the invisible punch thrown that sends us into deeper illusion because we do not even acknowledge that we cast it. As we are each comprised of truth deep at the very core of our being, to withhold the expression of it not only hurts us but also adds to the abuse and does naught to arrest it.

5. I unknowingly do put my head down sometimes because of my hurt and what I will see – I know I will see what I have been a part of too. So its probable I know what I am doing. The way out of this cycle, as Matilda has simply expressed, is to claim back our earth with truth for all and fill it with the beauty we all know within. We speak up not for self but for all.

6. “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Albert Einstein. This is all so true and as said in time past “for evil to succeed it is only for good men to do nothing”. The words “snitch” “grass” “tell tale” – people that do this have a personal agenda for themselves and not for the whole. Like a “snitch” will “grass” on their criminal pals so they have less time in prison or do not go to prison at all. Expressing what’s true has none of these agendas, expressing the truth is what’s possible if the environment gives permission for it to be so. And of course one needs to work on their own environment and thereby expanding this out to the world.

7. I am wondering if the general population is aware of how formulaic things have become for our young people at school; how teachers are pressured to say certain things a certain way, in a certain amount of time to start, teach and wrap up a lesson, as well as the directives from administration that what happens in the playground needs to be dealt with in playtime and not learning time. (This only works if the students concerned are game enough to speak up in the melee of the playground about what has been happening and there’s time to give the matter in hand the consideration it deserves.)

   A flow-on from this is that students are no longer being offered the safe and supported space of their own classroom to discuss what has just happened at playtime or during the time going back to class, as they used to be before the intense and now fairly universal supervision and assessment of teaching and learning became the norm.

   Students once were offered the space to be heard, plus the opportunity to understand and work through the situation so they were settled and ready to concentrate on the next lesson. Nowadays, they are shut down by the expectations of the system, however, the greatest and saddest fallout of that is the fact that these students are consequently shut down to learning and all that means for them emotionally, psychologically and intellectually. The consequences from this are huge, right here and now, however, they hold a ‘time-bomb’ of ramifications for the future well-being of society.

8. Imagine growing up as a kid. Even before you know words and can speak, you know the truth of what’s going on around you. Imagine watching those close to you choosing to be unloving and harsh – it’s easy to see how we get adept at bottling things up pretty fast. Because we live like this for so long when we finally do share, it can come out like a flood, or a torrent. Your words remind me today Matilda to share how I feel, but in a way that’s easy and simple and no big deal – we can make it like child’s play.

   1. I remember as a child being constantly told by adults – “You can’t say that!” – to which my confounded response was always – “But it’s true” – to which they would reply – “Yes, but you can’t say that, people will get upset”. This confused me because my intention was not to hurt anyone so I learnt pretty quickly to zip it up and keep it all in. Not so now… 😉

9. “well-rehearsed small talk and polite pleasantries.” That really is how a lot of society is now at, myself included a lot of the time. Afraid to speak up, say what we really mean and need to say in fear of others reactions. I was like that my whole life. Less so now, but there is still a lot of opportunities to say more, speak up more and not allow myself to compromise on anything.

10. Speaking up is not an option, anything that is not love and brotherhood needs to be exposed, ‘in the playground the child shakes away their disbelief that no one else is seeing and feeling what they are seeing and feeling, and starts to normalise the things that are not OK: rough play, foul words, gender competition, cruelty to fellow human beings etc.’ The more we call out unacceptable behaviour the more we give permission for others to do the same.

11. ‘As long as our nests are secure and apparently unaffected (“sure we argue sometimes, but the war is overseas”) we carry on regardless of the hurt and chaos. Heads down, eyes averted in case we see the same confusion and/or pain in someone else’s eyes and have to feel our own.’ This describes the human condition very well Matilda. It is interesting that we even have a term ‘human condition’ – this in itself should alert us to the fact that something is clearly not quite right with how we are and how we live – cocooned, silent, ignorant and desperately seeking some form of security.

12. Wow what a responsibility that we have to speak up and in that reflect and show to our children that they too can speak up, they too can honour what they feel. To not do this, to not speak up is what plagued me for most of my life and it took many years to heal those scars.

13. When you truly hold something, in a relationship, as a parent, in a work situation its not about just maintaining the status quo. You have to learn to call out the behaviour that is abusive, or does not serve the whole.

14. Thank you Matilda, those behaviours you note in the playground stay on into adult life, we often just get more ‘polished’ with them but they remain and we can all pay lip service to them to ‘keep the peace’ or we can stand up and say not ok for any or all of us. Not speaking up doesn’t help anyone, be they abused or abuser, we need to keep speaking up or if we don’t this does indeed become normalised … where we develop coping mechanisms rather than address the abuse.

15. We tell ourselves that holding back and being polite is the ‘right’ thing to do, not wanting to rock any boats, but actually all it does is make things far worse, rock far more many boats later down the line when the truth finally emerges. The situation is often by then far more messy and complicated than it might have been if we just said what we could feel, way back in the moment. When we hold back we do everyone a disservice – ourselves, others and the world at large.

16. To stay silence and with that thinking to maintain the peace, we think we do well but actually hold on to the rot that is underneath and needs to be exposed and revealed instead.

17. The choice is ours, to speak up or to play the social game. Thank you Matilda for encouraging and supporting us all to speak up when we feel/notice any form of abuse/harm.

18. Well put Adele. I am seeing how toxic being nice is.

19. Thank you for speaking out about this Matilda. I too notice how rough and cruel children are with each other, both physically and verbally. As adults we need to call it out whenever we see it, so that children don’t grow up thinking this is just how life is.

20. When we do not speak up we condone what is there to repress, intimidate and present a false truth, as we continue to do this that falsity becomes are reality. There is danger in this for our world and we can see it in every area of our lives, the majority do not speak up and illusion is allowed to pervade society.

21. None of us set out to live a lie or condone the lies of others but out of fear of the reactions that will come our way if we speak what is true, we have learnt to calibrate our expression to be in line with what the majority live, albeit if that is not in accordance with the truth of who we are, just so we do not ‘rock the boat’ and create waves that disturb the comfort we as a society have chosen to become so immersed in.

    1. Indeed Liane, we live a lie or condone the lies of others out of fear, but fear for what I am questioning? What is the idea we have created about fear that does stop us with enormous force to let come through that what is naturally for us to express. So what is that we call fear and we have sold ourselves out to?

22. There is definitely a pervasive thread that runs through Australian culture about not being a ‘…‘snitch’ or ‘grass’ or ‘tell-tale’. It’s almost as if you’re a criminal yourself if you dare to speak up about a behaviour or act or incident you’ve observed that is in anyway ‘off’ – as most whistleblowers would know.

    On the other hand, it’s quite possible that if you choose to protect a person or persons by not speaking up, that there is also a price to pay – often in the form of having the finger pointed at you, for staying silent and ‘loyal’ when the ill-deed is finally revealed… a kind of “You’re more responsible, you should have spoken up”.

    What a twisted and convoluted set of ‘rules’ we have created for ourselves. No wonder uncertainty sinks in and no one says anything.

23. What if all the people on the earth were blood cells in A person, a real big one. What happens when we hold back? Do we not cause blockages and clump together? Are we not doing the same to our body’s by blocking our evolution by hold back our expression?

24. Yes I completely agree Kim, I have been feeling this energetic bullying more strongly than ever recently. It is only when I do not react that I can read it clearly and by reading it I am not affected – but first I need to not react. One of the ways that supports me in this is to not take it personally and not see it as that person attacking me but an energy that is coming through them – usually because there is some hurt they have not deal with. No excuse for this behaviour but understanding goes a very long way!

    1. Spot on Nicola, our communication then becomes with energy and not the ‘self’ of the individual.

25. We should all speak up for truth and in truth and support each other and especially our children to do. We need to understand that truth and love are one and the same and what matters and what life is about. Truth does not judge, blame or condemn – it simply states things as they are and thereby allows an opportunity for awareness and healing to all.

26. “in my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.” this nails it, speaking up is not about worry what the consequences will be but instead knowing what the truth is and delivering that no matter what. Then the magic happens and the ripple effect is felt by everyone. A blessing but also the responsibility we all hold, when we don’t speak up we end up with the dissolution in the world we have today.

27. I love that quote by Einstein. We know how true this is, but because we have all been complicit, we avoid really staring at this in the face. But I know that every time i cover up what I feel, every time I hold back expressing in a true way, every time I see a lie and do not call it a lie, I add to the evil of this world. It is a simple immutable fact, and the responsibility is straight up – we cannot avoid this. We create the suffering in this world through our choices to stay silent in the face of the smallest iota of abuse.

28. This is brilliantly unfolded how disharmony in its many forms does prevail so persistently in this world – we all feed it with every unloving step we take, be it in silence or aloud.

29. Is it possible that when we hold back from expressing truth we confirm to others it’s also ok to hold back? So this would mean that when we do speak up we offer a reflection that others can feel inspired and supported to also speak up – a game changer all round.

30. We are very cunning at compartmentalising life and creating distance between us and what’s happening in THEIR family, THEIR country, THEIR lives etc., but the world we live in holds ALL OF US thus it’s OUR responsibility to look after it and the people inside of it.

31. This article more than ever needs to be read by the whole of the UK! and the world. We have for the last year sleep walked into the most monumental separation and division europe has seen since world war 2. We have the opportunity to vote again in a months time and I will stand up and put my vote where a new referendum can take place, I am talking to everyone I come into contact with about voting and presenting this fact of standing up for what you believe in and voting is important. So many are disenfranchised with the way things are that they feel powerless and just roll over. Like you share this attitude starts very early in our lives and it is only through role models that this will change.

32. This is a galvanising consideration, Jenny – an important call to responsibility that is brilliant to make, thank you – how collusive our silence is; how holding back our expression allows so many atrocities and ills to perpetuate.

    1. Yes… it also gives us something to work with at an individual level, rather than thinking it’s too big and what could ‘little ol’ me’ do to change things.

33. Yes Matilda, the “polite silence” we are so well schooled in contributes to the world remaining the way it is (or even getting worse). Your blog touched me deeply today reminding me that it’s possible to live from the truth we innately know, and to express this everyday, thank you.

34. We have allowed others to swing their fist any way they please until it touches our nose. We have gone a step further by moving through life with our eyes shut and our ears on mute. Albert Einstein has it nailed for what we have allowed the world to become!

35. Thank you Mathilda for being so clear and honest about that which we indeed truly deep inside (aware or unaware) know – that is when we do not speak our truth and play our part we continue the rot we then contribute to further making instead of stopping it by our voices and living truth. Us, living truth is the antidote to all the miseries that are going on on this globe, so the answer of : “i cant help” is simply a very irresponsible response to something you know you can help heal.

36. So many lies, pictures and misunderstandings occur between people that it is crucial that we speak up and use words of truth to clear the detritus that litters our realm of ‘thought’.

37. It is often difficult to speak up for fear of alienating people we know well. But what do we do when faced with abuse of an elder in her own home by her own children. In the person’s best interest it is important we speak up with the people involved, become the elder’s advocate, continue to visit, ask questions, reflect what more could be done and appreciate what is being done well. What emerges from this is an evolving relationship with the whole family and an understanding that everyone is doing the best they can with the knowledge they have and is deserving of support. Only through gentle but honest intervention can we reflect another way. In other words rather than condemn, speaking up can lay the foundation for us to build relationships, offer support and guide.

38. It is important to build families and communities where people are supported to express themselves and speak up when they feel something is wrong or unjust. The question is how do we respond? I’ve witnessed long term damaging effects when someone repeatedly speaks up about an injustice but is dismissed, undermined, humoured to protect ‘vested interests’ and existing status quo. Wherever we are we are family and community. The question is are we listening, do we support or do we play safe and back the winning or dominant side.

39. A memory floods back. A seven year old child living with an unkind family, not her own. She was favoured, but not her sibling. The ill-treatment he experienced was painful to witness. But who would know if she did not speak up. A family friend came to visit, took them away for the weekend. On the way back to the house, anxiety built up, a feeling deep inside could not be contained. Speak now, speak before he goes, and she did. Speaking up as a child is not easy. It helps when you’re listened to, believed and someone takes action. A new home and loving family was found. That moment when we choose to speak up can save and change lives forever.

40. Gosh, you have written this process very clearly, Ingrid, and it is alarming to read and consider the impact of this on all of us who have ‘lost our voices’. What is inspiring to realise is that it is never too late and we are always in our own driving seat. So, hands back on the wheel and off we go, map in hand, knowing full well where to find our voices again.

41. The idea of “I am worthless in the big picture and too small to make a difference” is one I have used for a long time to keep myself small and silent to the world. It made me even think I was not good in speaking in public or in writing blogs or articles for the world to read. How different it actually is as what I am currently learning that these ideas were just rubbish as I can write and share these writings with the world and I can speak in public and in that I bring that specific angle to the subjects at hand that are so needed to be heard and read.

42. I remember reading this article before and how it made me sit up and take notice, a deeper notice of what is going on around me. We are so often in protection of our own surrounds that is easy to look out and say how bad things are in other areas. There is always an extreme to compare to to make ourselves seemingly feel better and yet we don’t sharpen our view to our smaller world around us. What if every world is a smaller part of a bigger world? In this way what if everything we do to ourselves has an impact everywhere else. We have all heard of the butterfly effect and yet we haven’t taken this further to actually mean us. How can we make life so personal and yet not take it to the personal when we see things aren’t working? Our view is slightly one sided and so this already is saying bringing an imbalance everywhere.

    1. This is a great point about our avoidance of responsibility… the quiet, consistent, detailed responsibility that has us making choices knowing the impact that we have on everybody else in the world… the butterfly effect.

       1. And yet we will claim we are responsible or look somewhere else and compare back that we are more responsible then some. What we are saying here is a true responsibility that doesn’t just claim one corner or pockets of life but brings the same level to everything. There is no down part or part of life that we look at and say – ‘well it’s ok because I don’t do that everywhere or all the time’. We hold everything equally accountable knowing that how we are in any part always effects the whole. We love to break life up into parts and seemingly excel in one part and allow another to drop and yet the only place we can do this is in our mind. There is no parts when it comes to energy, it’s all there all the time, no exceptions.

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44. Having attended many sessions of the various Universal Medicine modalities I have come to awareness that if I don’t express what needs to be shared the harm is felt in my body. What has been awesome to observe is that the way this is expressed is always different, is shared with no perfection and is always a marker of what is there for everyone including myself to observe and learn.

45. It is so important to understand that taking responsibility to life is everywhere. We have to observe all aspects of life and ask ourselves if this is supportive to humanity or is it to keep us all in a lesser state of being, and in that I mean diminishing and ignoring the fact that we are all equal and divine beings living here together on this planet earth because of an ill choice we once have made.

46. The polite silences are one of the disease points in our society. One may as well be rolling ones eyes out loud! Why not be lovingly honest and really let people in! ‘Simply put, and in conclusion, my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade. Not OK!’

47. It’s like we live in a world of 2 realms – the one we play ball with (social pleasantries, holding back for not wanting to rock the boat, abuse being meted out not just between so-called enemies but also to our nearest and dearest……etc) and the one of energy we pretend is not there, where what we hold back from expressing is felt anyway through our vibrations. We fool ourselves into believing the latter is our own private world which affect no other, but this is not so, so when I hold back, I affect you – all of you. An inescapable and uncomfortable truth.

48. I have observed children hesitant from speaking their truth, worrying they will get in trouble, or be called ‘tell tale’…I actively encourage those around me of what ever age to say how they feel and if something has happened that does not feel great to be honest about it. I am still learning myself but know that, this holding back is bad for our health!

49. For me what I have learned is really powerful is saying something when we feel something doesn’t sit right with me, simply sharing that without any need to make it more, or be intelligent about why it doesn’t feel right. Rather just to share openly and what comes out of that simple act of standing up for truth is often quite remarkable.

50. When we don’t speak up or say things how they really are then we end up running with a version life which is disfunctional or in some cases even very functional, but it always feels void of the truth.

51. We most certainly need to speak up and not hold back on our expression. This is very empowering and inspires others to do the same. It is also really powerful in those times when no words are appropriate in some challenging situation but one stays aware and observational enough to bring in a sense of one’s own true value and not be disempowered by another’s expression. This can often bring healing to the situation.

52. It is amazing the extent young children hold back their expression in order to avoid being picked on and being bullied from others, as adults we need to support them by reflecting a way of being where expression is everything and the way forth in our evolution.

53. “Simply put, and in conclusion, my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade.” This statement alone says volumes about the insidious ness those little choices that seem so insignificant, because every little choice shapes the whole that we end up living in.

54. This blog is brilliant and so true. I have always been one that has coward in the face of things that are in just. I can see how this started at a very young age with a fear that many don’t like one that speaks the truth. Now on the path of speaking up, I’m seeing how holding back my expression is actually a selfish act, and in doing so offers no point of evolution for what I feel needs to shift in our world.

    1. I love this realisation, Kim, that holding back, not speaking up, is selfish and a disservice to all of us. This is a great point of myth busting.

55. What’s worse is that this culture is created between children. Yes adults have a big influence, however, children are also responsible for the environment in schools.

56. When we don’t speak up about what is happening in the playground, children start to behave in the same manner to fit it, or get picked on and bullied for not being one of the crowd, and they are almost certainly the more sensitive ones. If we as grown ups don’t speak out we are first accepting their behaviour as ‘normal’ when we know it isn’t, and the children are left to think that it’s ok, and secondly we have to let them know that there is another way to be, that society is not truly what has been reflected to them up until now. Is it not our Responsibility to offer them a truer reflection.

57. Playing the well-oiled social game… a great description, and a long way from the truth.

58. I feel like I’m emerging from some kind of cushioned cocoon, one where I have kept my head down, and kept myself protected in social niceties and polite conversation, not wanting to see or feel what is really going on around me. Starting to become more aware of what I can feel is changing this, but it takes more than awareness: it takes action and stepping out of comfort to actually call out abuse for it to stop.

59. A very insightful observation “the child shakes away their disbelief that no one else is seeing and feeling what they are seeing and feeling, and starts to normalise the things that are not OK” Boy, I can really relate to this! It started in childhood for me and continued on into adult life, I used to feel that I must be from another planet because everything normal here did not feel right to me. It’s interesting that when a majority lives a certain way then I may question what I know and smother my expression. A great conversation on speaking up on what is felt to be true.

60. I remember when I think back to the environment of the playground at school, and how it seemed to change as I got further up the grades, in grade 1 and 2 it was still fairly open and not confronting, a it got to grade 4 and older now there is a ‘pace’ in the playground and if you don’t keep up with it you’ll get hurt, and its where some more bullying behaviour becomes more common – and then enter grade 5 and competition is in full swing, now it is starting to be like you have a set group of friends, and you either one thing at lunch time or be alone.

61. The playground is indeed a microcosm of our society and the breeding ground for behaviours that have sadly and detrimentally become normalized in the world. It is here that children need to be taught and encouraged to speak and walk truth and be loving towards each other… for if they do not get this at home, they certainly won’t get it out in the world and so absolutely need the reflection and guidance of people such as yourself to show them there is another way to be with themselves and each other.

62. I wonder if the playground behaviour is a consequence of the parents telling the children at home not to speak up and the children then telling each other not to speak up.

    1. The old ‘children should be seen and not heard’ mantra – i.e. if you’re a child, you don’t know anything and your opinion, how you feel, does not count. It’s this kind of control and dictation that feeds the ‘it’s not safe to speak up, to say how I really feel’ beliefs that children take on from such a young age.

    2. As a child, one expression frequently quoted was ‘ Children should be seen, not heard’ and this really did squash open self expression. This was so because the people who cared for us had experienced the very same when they were children. It’s important we begin to build new cycles for our children and for ourselves where we feel, speak and are open with each other.

63. ‘Simply put, and in conclusion, my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade. Not OK!’ This is what we need to feel that we are all part of this and how holding back our expression is harming and not only ourselves. We are all responsible for far more (for everything) than we are willing to acknowledge and when we stay stuck in this small picture, individuality will ruin the world.

64. ““The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.”” These words have been attributed to various people – Edmund Burke in the 18th is quoted as saying “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” Regardless of where the quote originates the underlying message is that if we stand back and dont express, evil can flourish. So doing and saying nothing aligns us with the perpetrators. Time to stand up for truth.

65. When we do not speak up we are still communicating something…and its worth considering.

    1. I agree. That communication may be acceptance of questionable actions and behaviours by others who take the silence as assent or licence to continue.

66. What you share Matilda is incredibly important. It is essential that we speak up and do not accept abuse and lovelessness as acceptable or we are in fact condoning and participating in it. Speaking up does not always mean needing to actually speak, although very often it does. It is first and foremost an energetic response and we can often speak up by the expression in our eyes or our stillness in not contributing to something. However, often it is also required to verbalise. The first step is to be aware and not accept any form of abuse and from there we know what is the called for response.

67. When we don’t express what we feel we have to hold it back. And when we hold something back how can this backlog not put pressure and stress on us. Thus could one of the reasons the world is full of pressure and stress be because we are all holding back?

68. We are all role models for children – they learn so much through observing our behaviours and ways of communicating or not… The playground really is a micro-reflection of our world and this brings home to me even more how much of an effect our actions or inactions have on our society and all the children who are looking to us as leaders.

69. Holding back our expression not only harms our bodies and delays our evolution but also affects others as they missed on the wisdom from our soul.

70. Keeping our head down, not wanting to stir things up – we may think we are protecting ourselves, not realizing that is the exact attitude that allows and cultivates the rot we want to protect ourselves from. I have to say this topic is one that makes me feel very uncomfortable. Many of us can see the ‘wrongs’ in the world and we want it to be changed but I can feel how we want to remain not responsible. We want someone to come up with a solution if they dare suggest there being an issue, making it ‘their’ problem, rather than recognising the part we play and how we have contributed to what we all are going through as a community/nation/race of beings. And, there’s much pent up, unexpressed emotion on deck ready to burst and we are seeing more of its consequences in some extreme behaviours. There’s pressure that says ‘someone needs to come up with something, do something’, but we are all that ‘someone’.

71. Not speaking up and keeping things to ourselves I find is a real killer as eventually it has to come out in some form of explosion and trust me my explosions have been pretty extreme. But it has never been about others rather my anger and frustration at myself for keeping everything bottled up – its a bit like someone asking for a divorce because you didn’t take the rubbish out – lots of little silly things culminating in thats too much whereas if we spoke about all the little things they would not be able to build up.

72. Great blog Matilda, so powerful. When we do not speak up it does impact the whole. We don’t like to think that it does, but it does. I know from my own experiences, how it feels in my body when I align to social niceties and not speak what I feel or what is there to be expressed. It doesn’t feel great at all. There are of course times when we need to discern, but there is way too much holding back and the pleasantries come forward. If we all expressed more from our hearts, not our heads, this would go a long way to making a huge difference.

73. I have learnt that for the truth to be heard it is wise to first hold the other person in full appreciation of who they truly are and what they have to offer as when they feel met and not judged they are less likely to shut down and more likely to take in what is being shared without reacting.

74. What I am learning more and more is yes we do need do speak up but not out of reaction as in truth this does not change anything instead it is more powerful to come from an authority of saying no to abuse by and through how we are living consistently. This then starts to build a solid foundation to which abuse can no longer be a part of but first we must be willing to see all the rot that is there. Also if children or young people see adults not standing up for themselves or calling out abuse when they see it on some level they may feel why bother or what is the point. So it is our, the older generations responsibility to truly lead the way. It is also really important that all children and young people know they will be listened to and not judged, that they have a safe space to be in and go to when they need although again it is our responsibility that they have a safe space all of the time not just in parts of their life. It is great you are starting to see there is another way as indeed this will have a huge and positive ripple affect on others.

75. By not speaking up we are in fact harming ourselves . . . and everyone else.This is such an important point.

76. speaking truth comes from a strong momentum of living truth, and that means moving and making choices which are loving, without this words are not true – or words are only a reflection of what is already being lived.

    1. It is so important to accept and honour this fact, Harry. That our words are only as full and true as our lived experience of what we are saying.

77. …therefore, if we make it about connection and not competition, what we take away with us will help heal the harm we have otherwise caused by not living true to who we are.

78. We as a humanity are sick because we do not speak what is true but bottle it up so as to continue living the lies we have been fed and indeed gorged on and do not want to admit are not only not true, but also are poisoning us. Speaking truth may yet not be common, but it is in our true norm. Only when we express what we feel in our essence to be true, will we help turn the tide from the tsunami of lies that is threatening to take us out as a race of beings on this planet. It seems that we as humans need major calamities: natural disasters and plagues, to strike many times over in order to awaken us from our chosen slumber to such truth.

    1. Yes Liane great point, it seems that Great calamities are the only thing that awake humanity en. Masse sometimes, because the collective group comfort of bottling up speaking truth and holding back creates much tension we would other wise feel if we didn’t have so many go to solutions like entertainment, hobbies, pursuits, and the many foods, drinks and drugs.

79. This is a great question to ask in those moments of doubt “What happens when I/we do not speak up?”. Chances are we are just thinking what everyone else is thinking and it only takes one person to speak up to encourage others to stand up and speak up as well.

80. As I choose to take more responsibility for speaking up it is great to be reminded of the consequences of not doing so and observe, without judgement, the many times that I still fall back into social niceties. Thanks for inspiring me to consider the ripple effect of my choices.

81. It’s so true that it starts with the playground and children soon learn that to not rock the boat they have to suppress their natural expression and stop speaking up when they feel that something is not right. This then carries on into adult life. Is it any wonder that we are in the mess we currently are, with so much division and warfare of different kinds, when people are routinely attacked for speaking up and the majority choose to keep their heads down and pretend they haven’t seen whatever it is that really needs to be called out. So many feel powerless to change the status quo but that should never be a justification for not speaking up and also supporting others to do so, for example our children.

    1. Speaking from a place of truth and knowing may not currently be our statistical norm but it is totally natural and innate in us… we just have to remember or reconnect to what has been socialised under cover.

82. What happens when we do not speak up? The world is a poorer place because of it, bullying is never healed, victimhood is never healed, human trafficking is allowed to proliferate, slander and lies are condoned in the press, we stay enmeshed in the destructive game of ‘arrangement’ relationships, and eventually our head neck and throat suffer physically in one way or another. There is no excuse for not speaking up once we know this.

    1. Gosh when all these ills of the world are listed in this way I find it hard to digest that all is present in our lives because of not speaking up. But it is so True we have allowed it by not doing so.

83. It is crazy that we have created a consciousness in our society that considers the truth as something that is harsh, bad, mean or hurtful even. Is this because the truth calls us to be honest with ourselves and accept responsibility for our actions and behaviour? We seem to prefer to stay held down trapped by a web lies we choose to accept and allow to become normal, yet the truth is what frees us to be who we truly are by exposing, healing and letting go what we are not. We are surrounded by turmoil, abuse and suffering only because we have not spoken up of the truth we feel, and instead have allowed the lies to continue to develop and shape the world as it is today. This for me highlights the power we all have, as it is through what we choose in our daily life that directly effects the world we not only live in but are intrinsically part of.

84. If only we could hold onto what we felt as a child and take it through into adulthood and not hold back speaking our truth to each other. The world would certainly be a very different place. I can be guilty of holding back but am also re-learning to speak my truth, it can be painful and confronting at times but holding back causes disharmony in my body and can store up resentment, and after all, what are we afraid of by telling the truth, each others reaction, not being liked, being ridiculed, not being accepted… none of that really matters as long as we remain true to ourselves…. all I have to do is convince my mind of that, because my body always tells the truth, there is no hiding it.

85. I never thought I would see the day when I would get on a bus of over thirty children to express about how I felt about the behaviour of a child towards my daughter. A couple of weeks later, my daughter received a beautiful gift from the child as I jumped on the bus a second time to express my appreciation. Words alone cannot convey my deep gratitude to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine as I re-learn to speak up in all areas of my life.

86. The not speaking up has become a habit of all of us and to my feeling things will only truly change when we collectively will let go of this habit and do return to express all that lives in us and needs to be shared among all of us because it will serve our communities with true health. Allowing ourselves to express in full will then enforce change bottom up instead of the bottom down approach that we have allowed long enough and has suppressed our collective speaking up.

87. Such insights into human life you have brought to the proverbial table with this writing Matilda. I saw so clearly that if we accept the behaviour – by not speaking up – then we really accept it into our fabric of society and it becomes normal. We then may complain about it, wish it to be different some times, talk about it etc… but we also resign ourselves to the fact that ‘it is life’. But it is only part of our life because we said yes to it by not saying no to it.

88. What a fantastic blog, thankyou Matilda. It’s absolutely true that by not expressing or allowing others to express the truth about this world, we normalise what is not normal (brutality, corruption, dismissiveness etc) and begin to numb ourselves to the loveless realities we have now created, and accept a much lesser version of what life can be. How on earth did we all begin to champion polite? By doing so we believe we are not upsetting others when the world itself is allowed to be deeply out of balance – which is ironically deeply upsetting to us. Polite asks us to look away when we need to be each fully engaged with the world and with each other.

89. “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Knowing this and taking responsibility for this will change the world very quickly.

90. The playground is a stage of life and what we learn there we take into life.

91. There is something so pertinent here in what you express Matilda, and how our children pick up on what we normalise and so the abuse we all see and feel around us continues. Reading that we are ‘accepting arguing as a natural, even healthy part of relationships’ gave me pause, as in fact I do have this idea that if I can handle an argument with someone then we have a healthy relationship but is that in fact true at all, and am I just accepting a level of disharmony in me which then leads to that argument. Something I’d not quite considered this deeply in this way before, and what I feel deeply is that it starts with all of us and how we are with us, and spreads out from there to live and express that all around us.

92. “….I am allowing myself to see that there is another way which can turn all this on its head, and that my speaking the truth of what I feel and see in the world will not be treacherous, threatening and scary.”

    How gorgeous it is to connect to the fact that we can be in joy when expressing the truth. Thank you Matilda.

93. Not only do we feed the evil in the world by not speaking up but we also fertile the ground in which evil can enter and take over our behaviours.

94. My children have shared with me that they talk to the playground attendants about rough and angry behaviour and they often are told that they will keep an eye on the situation, but often they do nothing…I have been in contact with the school and we have talked about this and they have responded in many ways which have been supportive. However it is interesting to know that when my son, expresses that he or someone else was hit or threaten, it is not met with understanding or appreciation of what he is sharing. He is saying people aren’t being gentle, caring, loving because he knows they can, he is 5 and he knows another way and yet his truth is being denied and there is a different reality in the playground, so what is the truth…that it is normal to punch, sit on someones head or tell someone they want you to die? Or is it more natural to feel this is not our natural way and that we potentially can live from love and not our fears an hurts in everyday life. I support my son, in as much as I live life with the truth I feel, as much as I am able, he knows I practice this and we are in inspired by each other. He has a normal which may not fit into their normal they are presented in this world, I am willing to support him to explore it and honour it, as I am with myself, we will see how this unfolds.

95. It is funny to reflect on how these social agreements show themselves, when someone gives gift, or when we decide to leave a restaurant because it is too expensive for us, talking about that fact that Father Christmas is a story…these are all moments when I have realised how invested I have been in what we agree is normal, not unsettling the boat or some one being ‘offended’. I did speak my truth, how I felt, in these situations. However, honestly, I felt the pull to collude and not break social norms…the fear of not being accepted in what we consider normal is strong. This however is where the beauty of foundation comes in, because all of the moments when we choose to speak our truth, build up, they support one another and allow us in more challenging circumstances, however they come cloaked in ‘nice’ or ‘anger’ to be able to stay steady and say how we feel regardless of what is considered ‘normal’. I learned to collude in what is happening around me as a child, to attempt to protect myself, it didn’t really work, it just kept me small and hidden, and so I now practice to express and consider this a truly loving for myself and others. and know that the pressure of collusion will ebb and flow, but the foundation I am building will sustain.

96. Holding back may be something that we’re used to doing but that doesn’t mean we can’t make a change and start to redevelop expressing and communicating all that we see and feel and know to be true. It’s never too late to open up and speak up.

97. When we don’t speak up we effectively swallow what we need to say. Surely these unspoken words must accumulate in our bodies at the very least as stress and tension – how can we ever possibly think that this is healthy for us in the long term? Everyday I am learning more and more as Serge Benhayon has shared on many an occasion, ‘expression is everything’.

98. Playground mentality plays out in the world of work daily. In organisations it is common for people to experience or witness abusive behaviour but do nothing about it or don’t speak up fearing recrimination. Consequently, bullies are left unchallenged. Some companies offer staff workshops on how to express themselves, honestly, without emotion or reaction when faced with abusive behaviour. This only works if the employer’s values are sound enough to counter abusive behaviour in all forms at all levels of the organisation. Very often this is not the case: values are written but not practiced.

99. I totally agree that “the playground scene is a brilliant micro of the world.” What we see there is not any different from what we live as adults in our societies. We have to understand that this is not our normal way of being and that we all sense that this way of behaving ourselves is not true and that with that we ignore that part of us that we truly are.

100. The school playground is a pretty good description and analogy to the world beyond our front door. The interactions between people, the gathering of different groups, the sprinkling of a ruckus in different corners of the ‘playground’, is probably one of the early learning grounds where as children, we learn the skills of either speaking up against something that is wrong/unfair, or not.

101. Matilda you draw parallels between the conflict and disharmony we accept and condone within our own homes and the larger scale wars and internal conflict within and between countries… this is an important and powerful connection to make… as it is only through our acceptance of this type of dynamic between us and around us anywhere, that we tolerate it occurring somewhere further afield. As a one world we need to be saying no way to conflict anywhere being acceptable.

102. It can be difficult to stand up and speak and yet if we don’t we end up with a society that we all complain about.

103. “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Albert Einstein

     This perfectly sums it up. If we see something is not right then it is our responsibility to say no to it and speak up, otherwise by saying nothing and turning a blind eye we are allowing it to happen and so saying it is ok. We have to speak up and call evil out otherwise nothing will change. How bad do things have to get before we say enough is enough?

104. “…the comfy, familiar habit of social niceties and rightness, and the emerging, urgent, ‘loving humanity’ demand for truth. So just in case I hesitate for a moment, I consider “What happens when I/we do not speak up?”” The demand for truth has definitely raised its voice and is needed in current times more than ever. As staying silent and or nice has not worked and I know for sure in the UK, with recent events, this can no longer be an option.

105. Couldn’t agree more Matilda. I used to have the arrogance because I was comfortable and convenient in my life that what went on outside was not really my responsibility. I also never stopped to consider that the fact that I was controlling, angry, often frustrated etc didn’t really count towards being responsible because most of the time, I considered it was not public and contained within my home. It’s been vey sobering, but also very freeing, to realise the responsibility that we all have, not just within our own private lives, but in connection to our communities and nations etc.

106. ‘I can start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside, OR I can continue to play the social game – the well-oiled machine of my beautiful manners, well-rehearsed small talk and polite pleasantries.’ Wow with these two choices being so clear we can start to feel the effect one has instead of the other. Expressing in truth feels like it’s the only way to be.

107. I also would love to add to the debate…if we learn not to speak up because of reactions we are far more likely to hesitate before speaking up when we see or experience abuse. This can then be perpetuated for generations as children witness the abuse and learn the behaviour too. It is vital we have conversations around this when we talk about domestic abuse as a support to understand how we can break the cycle.

108. Learning to speak up, like learning to walk, can be quite clunky. The reactions that come from speaking up are rarely as understanding as when we learn to walk though so we either learn not to speak up, or we have guards. The guards mean when we do speak up it doesn’t come out quite as clearly, thereby feeding the clunkiness and potential misunderstanding. Oh the vicious circle!!

109. The playground is a very good example of this silence in the face of abuse. They learn that adults don’t always see things as they do, they hear words like man up, grow a pair and don’t be a sissy. We have all seen and experienced this, it is what we chose on the face of this that determines how normal it will be for us as adults to speak up.

110. It is common for us to call out and reprimand people who shout and scream, those who ‘cross the line’. Yet we turn a blind eye to the power of those who stay silent and sit on truth. For when we do this, we harm ourselves and everybody else, it just means we have to return to this issue later in this life or the next to learn to speak up. What if so much of the illness that we saw, came down in reality to us holding back? How absurd that we seek advanced medical technology, potions, lotions and remedies when the ability to simply speak always lives within you and me.

111. Speaking up can be very difficult with the ensuing confrontation, perhaps being ostracised, ignored or any other reaction we may experience but it can help if we understand that we are simply exposing another’s behaviour and that we’re not responsible for how they choose to react. It does take some practice and a deepening of the connection with ourselves but we have a responsibility to all out what’s not true.

112. When we say how we feel, often others do not like it, at least at first. This can seem yucky to feel so we bottle it up thinking we have ‘done the right thing’ by not making a scene. Yet the truth is if we let this reaction shut us down, it’s like choosing not to order a coffee, but drinking a vat of poison instead. When you calculate the harm holding back has on us and every body it’s an absurd choice to make. For when we share how we feel with Love, we all can grow and evolve and understand the very reason we are all here. Thank you Matilda.

113. A blog dismantling the hidden teeth of niceness and being polite. Creating a silence that is detrimental for us all.

114. I have come back to this blog for a reread but I honestly enjoyed it even more this time than I did last time, its just a powerhouse of a letter to all of humanity, it covers everything and makes you really consider the damage caused by taking a back seat, hands off approach to these broader goal issues. I am super inspired, thank you, just awesome.

115. Matilda, ouch those polite rightness is so rife and indeed I can feel it in me, how easy it is to fall into saying the right sounding words, but not speaking truth. Can we stand aside, no, we’ve fooled ourselves for long enough that we could but that is not true and it never was. Our politeness allows the rot and the abuse, and no matter how pretty our gardens may look, we are part of what is creating the ugly trash heap down the road or elsewhere. Everything is connected, and we cannot escape this no matter how many walls or hedges we put up.

116. We should learn from our own illness and disease how awful it is not to speak up. It is our responsibility to let ourselves feel what Matilda so powerful described: “I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.” This is the best medicine for all.

117. Not speaking up is endemic because of the rampant dis-empowerment of society in general, so it is essential now that we re-empower ourselves, and it doesn’t have to be grand sweeping statements, simple choice for our well-being are enough to turn the tide so that the bigger stage naturally emerges and we can take our place speaking about what is right and true.

118. It can be quite a journey finding our way to express what we are feeling and seeing, and being able to present it in a way that the other person, or people, can ‘hear it’. Like many I was brought up to be polite, to speak only when I was spoken to, and often told ‘don’t say anything if you haven’t go something nice to say’ which led to not openly expressing much at all. So it has been quite a journey in learning to trust what I now feel, and to express it, and with that I have had to learn when to express and how best to express, all the while learning that the body knows what is felt and indeed does know the truth. For me this is an ongoing process but what I have found is that it is not as scary as I once thought, and have actually experienced how easy it can be, and the opening that can occur when you do speak up….it can bring a lightness to your body and the space between you and the other that is awesome.

119. Matilda this is a much needed sharing, and as you expose – not speaking up is happening from a young age – we are encouraging a ‘nice’ society’ and thinking everything is OK in our own world because there are extremes elsewhere – but it is all our equal responsibility to speak up and claim how we feel. As you say we all have a choice – and to actually express starts to change things from within the homes, which will only support being able to express more and more outside of the home and to the world.

120. the perfect blog to wake up to this morning Matilda — what you share here is gold. And that quote from Einstein says so much… the very sad fact is that most of humanity doesn’t speak up even though every cell and bone in our body deeply aches for us to speak up. Why is this so? Because for a moment in that choice to sift through the muds of our self-made silence we have to feel how awful it has been to mute our voices and our love, and for many people this is just too much so we muffle our voices even more. We enjoin in the silence, become a part of it and seal ourselves into our own nest to comfort ourselves from the deep pain this choice comes with. But when we do sift through this, and out of the sticky mud we come, that moment of devastation is only fleeting, because all the truth we know in our hearts is there to be expressed all over time and time again. It is the most amazing liberation from the human condition of entrapment, when we don’t hold back from speaking truth. It becomes a tidal wave that liberates us all.

121. Matilda this is so true. When bad things happen to good people and we don’t speak up.We are either part of the problem or part of the solution.

122. A great blog to come back to and get real about. It made me look back at my recent history and look at times when I have not spoken up and the impact that has on all concerned or if I have spoken up out of reaction and not from truth. Thanks for the kick up the bum Matilda.

123. ““What happens when I/we do not speak up?” This is a great question Matilda, one that I have developed so much more awareness around over the last few years. I would feel it in my body when I wouldn’t speak up, as a teenager, in my twenties and thirties, at times I would and feel good about myself when I did. But a lot of the time would find myself landing in the camp of ‘being nice’ or averting confrontation in some way. What I now feel is that when I hold back, I am impacting everyone, not just myself. This is why it is more evolutionary to not hold back, expressing all of who we are, all the time.

124. Thank you Matilda for a great blog, When I don’t speak up and say what I feel is true, I can feel it in my body, I actually feel un well. Speaking up is something I have not done in the past , not wanting to cause trouble, make waves, make people uncomfortable. I have come to realise the harm I am causing to myself and to others by not speaking up.

125. Matilda I love that image of being too afraid of putting our heads above the parapet to speak up in case we get hit! We have certainly built fortresses of protection around us which our castles with their moats and parapets mirror in the outside world. Unfortunately none of us have ever truly prospered while hiding and keeping ourselves ‘safe’ from the outside world. The health of our bodies, minds, hearts and communities need to be open to a flow of energy to be able to flourish, not cut off. And daring to stay up and speak what we feel, lovingly, initiates that flow of energy in a powerful way.

     1. Yes, Lyndy. It is so important to debunk this idea of being ‘safe’ in our fortresses. It is isolation and separatism, not life. Opening up to ourselves, others and life is the key to our collective health, wellbeing and evolution.

126. Amazing blog Mathilda, so very real and well timed for this point in time. We speak not enough, and our silence kills. I like how it is spoken as it is , without trying to be nice or get something from someone. It is so important that we get more real, raw and honest about how life is, and what our responsibility is – open and wide. I trust this will change the world. And it starts by me.

127. With this one sentence you sum up how the world has become so tense, tough and hard.. How we have learned to not feel, instead of feel. Yet we all are responsible for that, even though we did not know any different, or did. Responsible in a way that once we see it – we can heal it.. Responsible in a way that once we sense a lack of love, we must seek true way forward how to truly love etc.etc. Amazing blog!

     1. Awareness does bring responsibility, yes. But life is so enriched by our realising that we are in our own driving seats and cannot blame others for the directions we take.

128. One true expression inspires another.

129. We say that we want the young to speak up and to speak the truth, but how many of us would cope with that truth delivered? We do not support this true expression for we avoid the responsibility that will come with this and be asked of us as a result.

130. We cannot support a generation of children to speak up and to express their truth when we do not do likewise as their peers, parents and role models. True change begins with ourselves.

131. How many of us are still walking through life with our hands over our eyes, saying i can’t see and you can’t see me and how many of us with hands over our ears, saying i can’t hear or turn on mute at whim?

     1. A really playful and important expose of us pretending we are not part of the big picture, the whole picture, and that by simply ‘shutting our eyes’ to what is going on around us, it stops happening.

132. “Whatever you do, don’t mention ‘X'”. “Whatever you say don’t go there”. “If you can just avoid this like plague everything will be cool”. But when we follow all these unwritten rules we actually end up ill and continuously dancing around, the elephant in the room. And isn’t the biggest elephant here, that we are all irresponsible in how we live, so by avoiding discussing this ‘X’ we think we ourselves can get away with it? The saddest part is through this route we all loose. There can be no doubt Matlida we are all here to speak the truth.

133. “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Albert Einstein. I have kept quiet for a long time but this is changing for I am part of the unsafe world we live in and therefore I have a responsibility to participate, speak up, work and love as much as I possibly can.

134. This is so true Matilda – children learn to be quiet from a very early age – they gauge the reactions from adults and other kids and adapt accordingly, to the detriment of themselves and their expression. It would be so great if we educated kids in a way that allowed them to express what they are feeling without condemnation. We would end up with a much healthier and fruitful society – our energy levels would be amazing as all the energy used for suppression were freed up!

135. An awesome blog Matilda, this line really stood out for me ‘ my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade.’ – very true, we all have a responsibility to speak up and expose evil and abuse in every form.

136. This not speaking up because of being perceived as a tell-tale or for any other reason is a very harmful thing that is used to control us all. We should always be free to speak up, to speak the truth and to say it as it is so we can all learn and evolve.

137. This is a brilliant blog Matilda and should be available at every school, workplace, office and home i.e. everywhere! We have all been playing a kind of conspired game together, as you so astutely point out when you say: ‘Back in the playground the child shakes away their disbelief that no one else is seeing and feeling what they are seeing and feeling, and starts to normalise the things that are not OK: rough play, foul words, gender competition, cruelty to fellow human beings etc.’ Rough stuff and abuse happens, nobody speaks up, the behaviour carries on and it becomes the norm. We have moved very far away from truly loving exchange and all because we have not spoken what we all know to be true.

138. This is a very important blog as it exposes a very ‘in our face’ situation in our world today: the lack of expression. It is a willful blindness that we hope someone will step up and express or just because we fear the possible consequences e.g.the reactions of others. The result is an ugly picture as you state: disharmony, aggression etc. We have the responsibility to speak up to what is presented to us in our face. There is no other who will do it for us. We just need to develop a solid foundation with ourselves, a deep trust, and that is the connection with our body and a deep knowing what we feel needs to be expressed, out there to be heard. I have found it is a daily practice – to truly open our eyes and observe and feel what is going on and when felt, express.

     1. Yes, that is the crunch, we do not speak up but we are the only ones who can do this, ‘There is no other who will do it for us’. You have put your finger right on it Caroline. We so often slide under the radar hoping someone else will do it for us. But no, we have to initiate our own ignition.

139. This is a to the point article that belongs in any parenting, education, self-help, university etc. book and course. A topic we cannot speak enough of and with that unravel our frozen behaviours when it comes to the disrespect and right away abusive conduct we demonstrate as normal with each other. As children we literally get shock-therapied into a harsh and very unloving world where function is valued above any loving connection and where what we feel is simply negated. It is time to allow us to be aware of what is going on and speak up and let us express what we really deep down care about.

140. When the rot in the world is happening ‘over there’, it’s all too easy to think we’re not a part of it because it doesn’t affect us. But the truth is, it does. I know we feel small in the face of much of what’s going on and that our tiny voice will be but a whimper, but remaining mute is a form of acceptance. Not speaking up allows abuse to fly under the radar gathering momentum until it’s too late and we wonder how it all got so way out of proportion and then we only have ourselves to blame when behaviours, attitudes and beliefs become mainstream and we are all affected. To let things go unheeded and turn a blind eye only serves to deny us the truth and the opportunity for change. Your blog puts the spotlight on the playground, where it all starts – the fitting in, the holding back, the wanting to be liked. It’s time we actively encouraged our children to express the truth of how they feel and what they see so that they don’t spend their lives with their heads in the sand.

141. Thanks for this Matilda, you’ve really exposed what goes on behind closed gates in the schoolyard, I remember my days at school and how I saw and felt a lot abuse going on but let it slide, afraid of the retribution. I feel its a double edged sword where the effects are that if I don’t speak up then the abuse continues and also I have to feel the contraction in myself of not expressing.

142. Is it possible that the end result of not speaking up is war and sickness? It seems a bit extreme to say this but the more I see and learn I realise that I have put so many conditions on when it is right or OK to speak up and when it isn’t, resulting in me being terribly polite and friendly and exhausted, sick with relationships in disarray. What I have learnt It is never OK to not speak up, those of us living in situations where our lives are not in danger, do not have the luxury of checking out in our comfortable worlds. There are people on the other side of your fence/street/country/world who need our voices.

143. Matilda, I like the responsibility that you are calling us to here. We cannot keep letting ourselves off the hook by convincing ourselves that somehow other people will speak up and make things all right whilst we do nothing. It is all our business what is going on in the playground, in households, between nations, on the Internet etc. No-one can afford to turn a blind eye anymore because whether we like it or not we all have a responsibility to ourselves and to each other to bring truth to the world.

144. This is as very important message and reminder Matilda. Children start out telling the truth but often get put off by others including parents at times. I remember when at school myself and the sometimes the awful names people called each other, usually walking home from school past another religious school and children would call each other derogatory names putting down the child for attending there. The more we have the courage to speak out the more things will change. Thank you Matilda.

145. I love the notion, or rather fact that polite silence=rot. I mean, who is brave enough to say that! Thank you Matilda for speaking up!

146. …’my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.’
     This statement alone is what we all need to hear and be inspired by, because it is 100% true that there is a ripple effect when one chooses to express truth. Every time is an opportunity for someone else to not hold back out of fear.

147. “I am worthless in the big picture and too small to make a difference.” This is a classic misconception and certainly one I have believed for a long long time! The lack of self responsibility in this statement is what is driving society’s need to remain stale and backwards.

148. “That, and in my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.”
     This is awesome Matilda, the willingness to relearn to say what we are feeling out loud opens the floodgate of the dam we have built within us, designed to hold back the hurt and the horror of such behaviours. When we say no and start to speak the truth, its not only the hurt that can be washed out and away, but that more love and understanding can pour forth.

149. If we don’t speak up, we keep on living in a world that has its foundation on non-truth.

     1. Thats right Mariette and the further we seperate from truth the bigger the correction

150. Following from the title’s question , I actually wonder how much of troubles in the world rise from not speaking up and letting things go unleashed. Therefore it must be wiser to start speaking up again – to eliminate the mess we have created and build by not opening our mouth before, not only by our voice, but also by the loving care we live in our everyday life – simply increasing both. I guess our world will then become a healthier place instantly.

151. And what is worse than the massive impact on others when we hold back in one area of our lives is the compromise and lack of fullness we will live as a result in every other part of our lives. Everything is connected to everything

     1. Absolutely, Joshua. And the inspiration is that every area of our lives we do not hold back in, supports elsewhere. We can work with our strengths, with awareness of our weaknesses, and the bar is raised throughout our lives.

152. Yes Matilda, I too feel that to stand by and do nothing is a choice as much as its a choice to stand up and express the truth.

153. Yes Toni, by being silent we are saying that we are in agreeance in what is going on. In speaking up, no matter the consequences, we are evolving.

154. Thanks Matilda for bringing such honesty. If we sit back and do nothing then we are a also a part of the problem

155. When I don’t speak up, I have this habit of starting to snack. The way I eat then is like a hamster, wanting to put something into my mouth as quickly as possible and just swallow it down. When I do that, I know something has not been expressed…

     1. Beautifully honest and therefore supportive, Mariette. I know I often use food as a ‘gag’.

        1. I love that word “gag” and yes, we use food for many things and this is one of them. I also use food when I feel absolutely great which does not make sense at all but hey, that is the point, we make choices that don’t make sense at all yet we still do it. That is why it is so important to observe why we do it instead of saying Oh I can’t eat this or that, because the food is not the issue, it is our grandness and light that we try to dull. That is the issue.

156. What you are so brilliantly saying about speaking up and starting this in the microcosm of the playground Matilda, is providing us the key for such an alchemy to occur for our society. The Playground is ‘the world’ for those children, and in this world they will bring forth a new world if they are nurtured to speak up, to respect and honour themselves and others . . . to simply express exactly what they are feeling without blame. What a society we would have if this were the case.

157. I have noticed this too Matilda, it is so important to encourage our kids to express with out fear – ‘ Children are nervous about telling people when things do not feel right because there is a culture of being labelled as a ‘snitch’ or ‘grass’ or ‘tell-tale’. So the children are learning to keep quiet, not saying out loud what they feel and know, whether it is something that has happened to them or something they have observed. This feels like a big ouch for all of us (I am sure our playground is not unique) – that children do not feel safe enough to express what they are feeling.
     ‘

158. Thank you for the reminder Matilda, that to not speak up what I feel is truth and pretend it is not there I am playing a part in creating the rot that we see in society and that there is so much I can do with my expression and the way it impacts and influences the all.

159. What I like about the picture you paint, Matilda, is the fact that it makes the one reading feel the impact on our following generation. What we leave behind as in what we speak up for or not, is what they will have to deal with… That’s huge!

     1. I agree Christinahecke, the ramifications of not speaking up will have to be dealt with in future generations, and haven’t we already left enough behind for us to clean up?

        1. Yes , not bringing truth is perpetuating a lie.

     2. Yes, everything we do or say, or do not do or do not say is part of the foundation for all that comes next. In the next moment, week, generation. It is huge; it is also beautiful in terms of knowing our place in the big picture.

160. You raise some excellent points here Matilda. It is very true, we need to remember how to speak up and not worry about people’s reactions to that speaking up as it will encourage others to equally find their voice. We feel everything and just taking the time to acknowledge what we are feeling to ourselves first and foremost, and then to another really helps the body process it, to build a vocabulary which is far more powerful than emotional resilience. It is a valuable part of education.

161. Beautiful Matilda. What happens so early on in kindergarten is that the lies of what is seen and felt are not being addressed. This truly makes a kid upset, because what it sees could be accepted and or true. This is how we make an environment of doubt for children, they then doubt their own feelings of purity. Of course this is not done on purpose by us as parents or teachers, but simply our way of how we have been used to it. Even though I am not a parent yet, I know that I have felt this having experienced this from kindergarten, and when observing the situation now, it appears nothing has changed.

     1. Wow, Danna, I love what you have written about the planting of the first seeds of doubt and how devastating it is for children. I remember it and observe it often. I picture it as a fog that I cast over myself by not honouring what I felt because it did not fit in with what I was being told.

     2. Well said Danna, as children we know what love is but everything else confirms the opposite, so it is confusing and creates the doubt that we are different and feel out of place. It is awesome to know that we can still reconnect to that which is pure within us at anytime we so choose.

162. Thank you Matilda for reporting about this and opening up much needed discussion. To me it shows how we are in society in general feeds back to kids in the playground, giving them the parameters so-to-speak of how they ‘should’ be in life. How we are as an adult adds to the way kids in the up and coming generations are moulded. Like you say we simply cannot stick our heads in the sand and try to avoid seeing the impact we all have on each other and the importance of each and everyone’s voice.

163. The attitude that “war is in another country, we’re ok cause at worst we just argue” is the ignorance that fuels the kinds of conflicts we have as a race all the time. I feel it is time that we all begin to accept that the ONLY way forward is a one Brotherhood cause if we are accepting war and evil is ok in another country what does this say about what we accept in our own?

164. It is fascinating the lengths people will go to in order to avoid speaking up. I feel one of the main contributing factors for this is people have a sense of hopelessness towards the idea that their voice makes a difference. It is easy to look at what is happening in schools and feel like you cannot but tow the party line and do what is asked because how is it possible to change such a huge system. Even when the majority of staff at a school disagree with new policies, these changes come in, become implanted by the people who disagree with them and so it goes on and on with everyone seeing the falsity of the game but choosing to stay quiet. There is a giving up energy that is relied upon by people in power as they know people need their jobs and very few stand up and say ‘this is not true and is harming our school children’. Sadly we will have to see the outcomes of a system that is not working before real true change can start to unfold.

165. I totally agree Matilda, the playground is a brilliant micro of the world and many of our behaviors are forged from our experience there. Often it is where we are first exposed to the rough play, foul words, gender competition, and cruelty to fellow human beings, which you described. Sooner or later everyone is picked on in the playground, and what hurts most is not the bully but those who stand by and say nothing. It is the same in the world of adults often we can see and feel the cruelty but do not call it out because it has been accepted as normal. We must speak out and change this hurtful immature culture.

     1. Well said Bernie, we feel the lack of support most deeply, I would go further to say not only the lack of it from others who stand by and say nothing but also our lack of support for ourselves, when we feel unable to stand against such experiences.The culture is so ingrained and ‘normalized’ we allow it to render us powerless. Building a more loving and accepting way with ourselves builds confidence in what we feel and know and in this development there comes a time when we no longer accept what is unacceptable.

        1. Well said Jeanette. This is absolutely true.

     2. ‘…what hurts most is not the bully but those who stand by and say nothing…’ – this really strikes a chord for me, Bernard, we can all feel the collusion. It is so amazing, refreshing and evolving when someone breaks out! As in, simply says what we are all feeling.

     3. Very true Bernard, if the abuse is not called out then it is accepted as normal and life goes on and turns into a destructive cycle.

166. For a long period of time I allowed someone who used lying and manipulation to continue with this behaviour, to try to just ‘keep the peace’, ‘not make a big deal’ of what took place and I thought I was choosing to ‘be the bigger person’ for letting things go. Finally, I said ‘no more’! Through the understanding that expression is everything and from the many inspiring blogs about speaking truth and calling things out I had the confidence to speak up. I was told by others that this conduct had been going on for considerably longer than I had experienced it and that I was the first to call it out. I found this staggering that this had never been addressed before. I thought about how if someone had called this out when it started, this behaviour may not have been given permission to flourish. This behaviour caused a lot of stress for other people and created unnecessary toxic situations. While things were at first awkward from calling this behaviour out in a non-aggressive way, the lies and manipulation have stopped. We must build the confidence and trust to call out what we see as loveless behaviour so we can pave the way for love to be felt.

     1. This is a really good example Tracy.

167. Feeling too small to make a difference is a convenient feeling to hold onto as we can justify not taking responsibility. I have often felt this way and looked at the world in a given up energy. But as you say Brendan, we have history to reflect back to us that truth being expressed by just one single person can dramatically change the world.

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169. this is a great blog making me aware of the enormous effects not speaking up has, and I can feel how it indeed starts at school, not speaking up brings such a normality to everything that is not, it blurs the lines between what is ok and what is not, as no one is willing to be honest and say what is the truth, as they may be picked on by others who are still in the bubble of that everything is as it is and that it is ok… While so many things are not, this is truly inspiring.

     1. And there are hundreds of ways of “speaking up” – It also can be having a different speed than others, a different way of moving, expressing lovingly when others yell or not say anything at all – it is simply allowing the body to “speak” truth in a way of feeling what the situation needs. Great, Benkt*

     2. Brilliant, Benkt, you are exposing the patterns that keep us imprisoned simply because we are not being honest with ourselves and therefore others. There is so much in surrendering to honesty and letting ourselves develop and expand this.

170. This is an awesome quote Matilda, from Albert Einstein…”The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” It brings to the fore, the question of responsibility.

     1. Many of us feel uncomfortable with taking responsibility and the moment we do try to change that pattern we are often shut down by others. We must all take a stand and call out what is not true for we are all left to live in a world that has been created with lies. This affects us all on a micro and macro scale.

        1. Well said Tracy, In expressing the truth we can often get shut down by others, but its up to us to expose it no matter what, as standing by and doing nothing is actually saying that the abuse is acceptable.

171. “My polite silence”. . . The times I have not spoken up gave others permission to assume that I agreed with their stance and that created enormous damage in some of my relationships. I choose to no longer allow that and though it can sometimes be difficult to stand firm and speak up against something that is harmful, when I do there is often an opening up and a freeing feeling all round, as though it is a stop moment we have all been waiting for.

     1. Hear hear Jeanette!

     2. A Truth beautifully written, Jeanette. Having always held a ‘polite silence’ I am now beginning to speak up and although it feels ‘clumsy’ most of the time, offering the truth brings the space for what is to unfold – to unfold. I loved the comment – ‘That, and in my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine’. Thank you Matilda for opening up this topic for discussion.

        1. Its a great thing to realise that through expressing what we feel we are reimprinting the world as we go.

     3. Well said Jeanette…what we walk by is what we accept. By not speaking up we are actually saying so much. We are choosing to say to others that we either agree or are too afraid to rock the boat, both very harming and feeding the fear in others to not speak up when something isn’t right. We are all role models in every moment. It is something I am working on all the time and, with no perfection, I simply ask myself to honour what is there to be said at the right moment as I have felt the consequences of not speaking up in my body and I have found it to be harm-full.

     4. Well said Jeanette, and our body feels just how freeing that is, as withholding something always creates a tension inside.

        1. Yes, Yes, Yes, to all you have said Jenny and Jeanette, on not speaking up.

     5. Yes, I totally get this…when we do speak up, we are saying something that everyone is already feeling. I find that for myself but also around others – someone will say just what is needed and what is on the tip of my tongue too. In realising this I have to accept how we are all connected, all of the time.

     6. Oh I get that Jeanette! On the surface in that moment it can’t be a little scary to say No to something that is harming or even to just disagree…but everybody loves to hear the truth, even if not immediately and a certain level of respect and appreciation comes from it. It certainly either stops or slows down the force of the negative situation.

     7. Thanks for bringing up the insidious consequences of “My polite silence” Jeanette, for not wanting to upset others creates a poison in our bodies that we later need to deal with as a result of holding back our truth. Reconnecting to our bodies and honouring what we feel is the only way to go.

        1. That is correct Francisco and the poison feels awful right from the moment the holding back happens.

172. There are so many many times when I have not spoken up in a given moment when it was needed. Usually I have felt it immediately in my body, it felt like I had swallowed something unpleasant. It would never feel good at all. Over time, I have learned to express more and more, understanding how important it is not to have that energy stay in our bodies, we are made to express and if we hold onto it, it can become illness and disease in our bodies.

     1. So true Raegankcairney. I think many of us can relate to this behaviour playing out. Many times we allow things to unfold even if we know they aren’t true because we don’t want to be seen to be making a big deal of something or known to be creating conflict. I have found speaking up to be an amazing experience, albeit difficult at times, especially when we can express from a loving place. What I have found is that many others were feeling the same and wanted to express also but through fear of judgement chose not to. If humanity had spoken up a long time ago we wouldn’t be in the debacle of world chaos that we are all now living amongst.

        1. Yes, I have found the regret of not speaking up actually eats away at me and I rerun how I should have dealt with a situation or a conversation. The situation feels incomplete. There is always another similar situation just round the corner to have another opportunity though so learning to be loving and understanding with ourselves is a valuable skill to learn as well when speaking up.

        2. That’s so true Lucy. No need for the regret because that situation will unfold again and again until we learn the lessons that needed to be learnt. Ground hog day till we learn to live and express with love.

     2. Yep! I know exactly what you mean raegan. I know the very split second I have swallowed my words or not expressed in full. It feels uncomfortable until you convince yourself it’s too late to saying anything as the moment has passed….but the reality is it’s never too late and that’s just an excuse to not have to feel the potential reaction from another of the words you wish to express.

173. Matilda, you bring up a great point here, if we don’t speak up, we are accepting all that goes on and literally rubber stamping it. Even if it starts with a few people speaking up and calling out the truth, by virtue of reflection the numbers will grow.

     1. Yes Sally , we are all accountable

     2. Well said Sally, we need to understand the responsibility of our reflection.

174. If we don’t speak up and live to the responsibility we have and know to be true it affects us – its like we begin to attack ourselves and become ill.

     1. Yes very true Donna. It is like we are our own worst enemy and we abuse ourselves and all others when we do not express what we feel to.

        1. When I don’t express what I feel it can feel crushing inside, like I have shut myself down as if I am my “own worst enemy” as you say Kelly. If I see what is actually happening, it is not letting me be me, not trusting what I know and that it is ok if people don’t agree – only important that I express in a loving manner.

     2. I find that if we don’t speak up we confirm that behaviour to be acceptable and allow it to flourish. If we put a stop to what we know is not true then we stand a greater chance of creating a world that becomes more accepting of the truth being spoken and acted upon instead of a world that is more comfortable with lies.

        1. True – I am with you in bringing truth to where it is needed, Tracy*. Sometimes speaking up can also scare people away. The body knows when and what to say or act upon.*

        2. That’s right Christiana. Sometimes speaking up can scare people away and that’s why it is important to present in a way that is understanding to the other person but also without capping the truth. The body does know what to say and or act upon. It has been an amazing journey finding my way with this and seeing and feeling what has worked and what didn’t and why.

        3. Well said Tracy. We can get more comfortable with lies – I can see more how crazy it is when you put it like this.

        4. Truth is who we are. Whether we’ve done our best to bury it or hide it in a cupboard somewhere, we miss it. I know I do even though it can be challenging at times. So when people do speak up I suspect people are glad and probably relieved it’s someone else who’ll take any flack for speaking up. No-one likes what is not true or what is abuse – even if this truth is also buried deep for some.

     3. Yes Aimee I have done this as well…I have waited for others to confirm what I felt to be true before speaking up. But we cannot do that any more….we need to speak up. I also identified with this line – “I feel clumsy as I flounder between these two things: the comfy, familiar habit of social niceties and rightness, and the emerging, urgent, ‘loving humanity’ demand for truth.”. When we have all played the social niceties, it can take some time and commitment to wriggle our way out there and step into truth.

     4. Very true, that looking outside our own knowing for confirmation that what we are feeling is actually what we are feeling….absurd really because we are the ones feeling it! Yet this is the pattern. I think it is like asking a question in class, loads of other people want to ask the same question, or in this case acknowledge the same feeling, but they need someone else to go first! From my experience, the moment I acknowledge what I am feeling or ask the question, there are others around me who say thank you for bringing that up, or saying what we were all feeling. I too appreciate when others do the same, we have to work as a team as we rebuild this confidence with ourselves.

     5. It is easy to forget that people do get inspired and appreciate when someone is bold enough to speak up. Allowing ourselves to make mistakes with it is important too for the learning.

     6. Yes Aimee, looking outside of ourselves for anyone to confirm who we are is such a devastating way of living. I know I lived that way for a very long time and it did absolutely nothing to build your self worth or love for yourself. Trusting how you feel and your body, is a true pathway to building that love.

     7. I can relate to this too Aimee, to where I held back and second guessed myself if what I was feeling was true.

175. Its a constant choice to what we are saying YES to and the responsibility that comes with that and of course the ‘correction’ that is later needed should we sit back, check out and give up.

176. I agree Alexander, since everything is energy and running in and through us constantly, then we need to choose what we are saying Yes to, the ill energy or the all encompassing love around us and oneness energy.

177. I participated at a seminar last week-end. What happened is at times some participants were busy with their mobile during the class. One day i joined in- as i didn’t feel so well and used it as a way to check out. Even i could feel that is does not feel right to do this during the class and is in a way distracting and dishonoring of the teacher and the participants. So at the end of class i shared with the group that it doesn’t feel right to use a mobile during the class. I wanted to know how the group feels about it so we can see. What happened is that only the people who used the mobile justified or defended. No one from the rest of the group shared their feeling about it so i stood their on my own not knowing what the group is feeling and i also withdrew a little not holding myself steady trusting my feeling. But the next day only one from 3 people used the mobile a little but not as much. So to speak up has an effect that was my learning experience.
     I choose for myself that i no long tolerate thing which do not feel right even if 14 people in the group do. It is my responsibility to speak up but without expectation or certain outcome. Holding myself and what i feel steady even if no one else is speaking up.

178. “That, and in my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.”
     I deeply agree Matilda!

179. Just this week I had an insight into how not speaking up on an apparently minor issue set in play a set of behaviours in myself that not only undermined me and created complication, but also deprived another of the opportunity to learn and grow.

     1. Very true Anne – that is exactly what happens, we rob another of their own learnings and awareness that would come as a result of speaking truth. Its a responsibility.

180. Well said Matilda – ‘Back in the playground the child shakes away their disbelief that no one else is seeing and feeling what they are seeing and feeling, and starts to normalise the things that are not OK: rough play, foul words, gender competition, cruelty to fellow human beings etc.’

181. This is an awesome blog Matilda and so very important. You nail every playground across the world. Imagine if we could turn this around in schools and give children all around the world a good foundation for speaking up and expressing truth , it would probably change the world. Turning a blind eye when everything is all right in our nest surely can’t last forever as the world is getting worse by the moment.

     1. Yes kevnchardy, the school playground would be a great part in early school life to learn the fundamentals lessons of speaking up and expressing truth.

182. So true – I have come to realise that when we ‘forget’ to make the choice to move with quality in our movements we have in affect chosen something else. For me this is like a default functionality which does not have the quality of presence I know to be me.

183. Keeping quiet in the school ground happens so early in one’s life and places the spotlight on what Humanity is selling out to in allowing or even fostering this way of being. By expressing what we feel is true in every moment, by making this our way we will change the current status quo. Speaking what we feel deep within to be the truth will hold it’s own in the world that fosters and rewards living in separation.

184. Speaking up and nominating what is not truth is not only self healing but its the only way to fix the mess the world is in

185. Building the connections and relationships is equally important as speaking up so that people can recognise in the equal quality in which we express rather than react to someone can appear to be overstepping a boundary.

186. Very aptly said Deborah.

187. I love this blog Matilda. We have become a society that normalises abuse because we do not want to take responsibility for the mess we have created. Instead, we constantly compare our loveless actions to those of another, and granted, there will always be someone who is behaving much ‘worse’ than ourselves and so presto! we have an excuse to continue on our merry way, leaving a tsunami of abuse in our wake that we simply refuse to see simply because someone else’s ‘tsunami’ is bigger.

     Furthermore, we are a culture that thrives on the creed ‘anything in moderation’ and in this way we accept, condone and allow abuse to flourish as long as the scale of that abuse doesn’t go so far as to show us the truth of what it actually is. When really, ANYTHING THAT IS NOT LOVE IS ABUSE. There is no scale. It either IS love, or it IS NOT. The shades of grey that we introduce are a convenient disguise so that we can continue to live in a loveless way without being made accountable for it. There is only so long that this way of living can continue before our bodies and the earth we walk upon make visible the extent of the lie that we live. If we are honest with ourselves, we can already see that this is so.

     1. Amazing, Liane. So clearly said. We can duck and dive our responsibility as much as we like but the truth of what is going on, we already know, absolutely so.

188. What happens when we do not speak up? We are answered by the roar of silence that condones the abuse that we see but do not want to deal with and so we pretend that we do not see it, so that we will not have to speak up about it. A lot happens when do not speak up…probably more so that what happens if we do.

     1. The holding back is huge: a vast wasteland of things unsaid, both about the atrocities and abuse that are going on every day everywhere and the missed opportunities to connect to each other and say ‘I love you’.

189. When we are open to learning from all of our experiences our relationship with life goes to a whole ‘nother’ level of understanding, commitment and integrity. I love what you have shared here Esther about the ramifications of not speaking up and then the truth about the fact that it is never ever too late.

190. It is a cruel world when that children do not feel safe enough to express what they are feeling… this is the world that we are living in but to start creating true safe places for the children is something that is happening with the culture or Universal Medicine. I see how much the children are so open in communicating what is going on for them, even though it feels hard and challenging. I really admire these children and get inspiration from them in sharing how I truly feel about things being an adult.

     1. It is like watching an oil tanker turn out at sea: no sudden movements but a perceptible and sure incremental change of direction. I agree, Natasha, watching the children working with Universal Medicine and staying open to communicating their feelings and observations is properly inspiring.

191. It is very sad that this choice to not speak up starts at a young age and then continues on in most cases right through our lives, and then becomes our norm. I became one of those people who would keep it all in and the reasons why became vast and varied, but I have discovered it is actually so much more fun to speak up and my body feels differently for doing so. It does take some getting used to but well worth the effort.

192. Awesome, thank you Matilda, just by you exposing this I feel a pull to be more of me and to come out of my comfort zone and to speak and not hold back what I know to be true. For too long I have held back for fear of what others may think or how they may react. Your quote from Albert Einstein speaks volumes of this – when I don’t speak up I am indeed adding to the very evil that I am so opposed to.

     1. And when we do not speak up we are withholding from life something truly valuable – us in all our wonder and grace in full in the world.

193. All of our lives we are running after something that we are missing. We want more or something different. Could it be that our lives would be totally different if we got taught and reflected during our childhood that we are enough just as we are and that we only need to be ourselves and be just as we are to live a life of harmony, joy and unity?

194. We pretend to educate children to the best of our abilities, but what an education is it, where the first thing they learn is to not be themselves?

     1. Oh spot on Michael. It is a very deliberate plan of the energy that owns education to teach children not to be themselves. The first step to imprisonment.

     2. If we were taught from an early age that we are love first before we are anything else, then the world would be in a very different place. That said, we do not need to teach our children to be love, we need simply to remind them.

195. “my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade. Not OK!” Well said Matilda. We all have a responsibility to speak up when we know something is not true. We live in a world of our own making and to make this world a place of love and harmony we have to speak truth.

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197. There is a huge responsibility for each of us, that, as you say, is made unimportant at such a young age. That watching everything that goes on and just leaving everything we see for what it is, has become the norm. Which is awful to feel and definitely needs to change.

198. How many times are we told to just stay quiet and hope that it will go away. Or better still just don’t say anything and it will blow over. How ridiculous that we teach children to act like this and then as adults live with the regret and bitterness of never speaking out.

     1. Rather than ‘blowing over’ things left unsaid, sink in and find roots and entrench in our patterns and behaviours. It is never too late, we just make it harder for ourselves to be free of habits that are not loving, true and in line with our evolution.

199. This is a brilliant blog Matilda. I have been working on my own expression for some time, and speaking up the truth I feel with things, and now it seems that I can see my own children struggling to do so just as I did as a young child. It has taken me 30 years to start expressing the truth I feel and it is perfect that my children have that support to start doing so now. Thank you for the gift of your words. Very timely.

200. Young people have shared with me that even when they have spoken up to teachers about being bullied nothing has been done and this includes showing them physical evidence! What kind of society are we living in? We are basically saying there is no hope, there is no support you have to put up with it. This is terrible, no one person should ‘put up’ with abuse and every person should be able to express what they feel or are concerned about openly and have support in place fir them when needed as long as it is not harming another.

     1. Indeed it seems there is no hope, no support for those being bullied, even when they spoke up. I see it also at the workplace. It starts with ourselves to set an example of building loving relationships, being and expressing truth in a loving way. Even though it is hard, even when we don’t get support right away. It sometimes takes a while for others to drop their guards, hardness to truly trust you are to be trusted. I have the feeling many have lost to trust themselves in what they feel and to trust others to be truly supportive. Let’s be the example.

        1. That is an inspiring call to action, Caroline. Why not start today being the person who someone starts to feel as different: steady, trustworthy and honest. I know that one person makes a difference. I have felt it in the support I have received and in the moments when people have opened up to me because of what I represent to them and the foundation we have in our relationship.

201. Matilda, I loved reading your blog, and how you open up such a great subject. I really felt how manners can be used for us to hold back and not speak up, because it’s not the done thing, or it’s not my place to say anything, and we hold back speaking up. It is time that we all spoke our truth and start reclaiming it, and then as we do, the playground will become a place where children are free to speak their truth again.

202. I love the way very young children just say it and ask it how it is. It is sad when it gets to the point of the adults around them trying to quieten these voices and can be the start of how we then do not express, or complicate our expression to remain within what we think is the polite or right way to say something. Thank you Matilda it is time to break these choices of silence and politeness.

203. The quote from Einstein is so very true, each and every one of us that holds back the truth is only adding to the mess the world is in from everyone en masse not standing up for truth. The suffering in the world could be wiped out rapidly if truth was allowed to break the hold that corruption, religion, Nationality has over us.

     1. This is awesome and powerful to consider. That the ‘suffering in the world could be wiped out rapidly if truth was allowed to break the hold that corruption, religion, Nationality has over us’. We feel that in our every days when we do step up from the quagmire of lies that are our social framework and express truth.

204. “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing” – this is such a chilling statement, but true. Those ‘look and do nothing’ are a silent seal of approval.

     1. Nailed it. When we do not speak up about the unacceptable we are giving it ‘a silent seal of approval’, leaving us all in the quagmire for even longer.

205. It is actually very disturbing to feel the level at which we have drowned out the innermost truth of what we know for a superficial, pretend world. This is far from our normal and a call that says loud and clear that everyone of us can contribute to speaking our truth because our world needs it.

     1. YES…’our world needs it’, it is our natural expression and humanity deserves it. This is all of our responsibility as integral parts of the whole.

206. Perhaps it suits us to not hear rather than to read what is needed and to respond. We can easily desensitise ourselves to a repetitive noise. The truth is that any one of us can feel if a baby is distressed, hungry, in pain or reflecting back to us our own state of being at that moment.

207. Matilda I thank you for re awakening the sense of responsibility we all have, but don’t always act on. I know it is scary, having spoken out to a Mother who was berating her child of about four, and shouting in a public place while others looked on in embarrassment or just not wanting to interfere and crossed to the other side of the road. I feel we all need to be more caring and not turn the other way!

208. We can find various reasons for just looking on and doing nothing, but no justification.
     Saying nothing means holding back what we feel and with that holding back a piece of the bigger puzzle.

     1. Yes we can be artful making up excuses for not speaking up, but it never makes sense.

209. I too have become aware that by not expressing my opinion about things that feel totally wrong in our society I was in fact condoning everything going on. We have accepted the way things are as though our hands were tied around our backs. Matilda you are so right about children playgrounds, they are a reflection of our current society and as Michael stated earlier we should be learning from the children instead of the other way around. Serge Benhayon has helped me wake up and take my responsibility in this world we all created together. It may feel like we all have enough on our plate to worry about the whole of humanity but what if we have so much on our plate because of the way we have been as humanity and that there is a way to change all that.

     1. We can also extend this to the point of true brotherhood when the enormity of realising that we are part of humanity in its entirety becomes our greatest support.

210. Wow Matilda hit the nail on the head, having to re-learn speaking up and out aloud plus standing up for ourselves seems to be one of the biggest challenges I’ve seen and also had to deal with, we have been sitting on the side lines for to long we all have the strength to do this, again I’m inspired Thank you

     1. And yet when we do speak up, although unfamiliar, it feels totally natural and in line with what is required. Less and less I have the torturous post dissections of conversations I have had and what I did and didn’t say. As I simply get on with it, conversations start and end and then I am free for whatever is next.

211. Supporting children to express what they observe, feel and understand feels like beginning to turn a tanker around. So, so important to firstly admit we are currently going in the wrong direction and then to take whatever action is required to make the changes; not give up because the task feels too big, but to appreciate the integral parts we all play. At first the tanker does not look like it is changing direction at all, but the machinations inside are setting up and when it turns it will be seen by all!

212. Great question, Brendan. They also have to mutate themselves to mimic these behaviours which has devastating effects as they move further and further away from their natural state of expression and understanding.

213. Indeed Brendan, what role models are we providing? I once witnessed a mother throw a very loud emotionally manipulative temper tantrum in front of her children. One of the daughters mimicked the exact scenario the next day having previously never displayed this type of behaviour. Children have much to contend with these days, with constant bombardment by social media; TV, advertising, the internet, films, celebrities, DVD’s music and music idols all of which asks them to be more, to be something else, to behave in unnatural unhealthy ways. None of which reflects the beauty and strength of who they are by just being them. As adults we hold a great responsibility to speak up for truth and reflect the love and joy these children are so they grow up knowing love is their essence and truth can naturally be spoken.

214. Well said Matilda, I love what you wrote; we all have a choice to speak, walk and write the truth, or to play the polite game of being nice and fitting in.
     For me to speak up and have the risk of confrontation is very scary, but the alternative of not saying my truth feels much, much worse in my body.

     1. This is great, Thomas, an honesty that is a ticket to learn, change and grow. There are all the perceived risks of speaking up and then the urgent clear signs from my body, and repercussions of, not saying what is hanging there to be said. These mad little battles rage on and if I succumb to the ‘voice of polite compliance’ my body cops it…as does the world for one more held back expression of what we all inherently know. Conflict in whatever shape (from siblings fighting over lego to full blown war) is not our natural state – there is no conflict in brotherhood. We truly can work together for change, our last frontier being a need to be individuated from the rest of humanity. Full submersion with appreciation for our unique expression of, and in, this unity is the surrendering way to go!

     2. I agree with you Thomas, as it has also been my experience that confrontation is scary but the more I do it the less scary it becomes. I am finding the choice to hold back is lessening because I prefer how I feel when I speak up, and hate the feeling left in my body if I don’t. I would say that for me it was as if the holding back had built up to such a great extent that it had become an ingrained pattern and I had to choose to speak up over that very strong urge to keep things to myself – now it is so much easier to speak up without worrying if I am going to be accepted or not, or deal with the backlash.

215. I get this too and actually make the stumbling block that is talking up as high as an ten foot fence – impossible to climb over with any grace or dignity, full of worry that what I am saying will hurt another or indeed not come out perfectly made. I am attempting to restep when I fall.

216. The playground could easily be called our home or our workplaces.
     It is worth observing where we dumb down, remain silent when our body is screaming out to speak up or negate truth to not rock the boat. This all keeps the cycle going incessantly and is far from the ‘comfort’ we believe that we have.

     1. That has been super important for me. Getting honest enough about the ‘comfort’, which is really just habit and familiarity, to see it for the opposite it truly is: the fact that it holds us in the pain and isolation of perpetual disconnection and absence from ourselves and each other.

217. What are we modelling to our children that they feel unable or unwilling to express? If we don’t lead the way to speak truth and say what needs to be said as role models and allow our children space, understanding and to honour their voice then we are retarding generations to come and cementing loveless ways.

     1. The joy I see when children are given the space to talk openly and honestly is both inspiring (they have so much innate wisdom to share) and shocking (that that is not our everyday norm). Our service is simple: to listen and to model speaking up/sharing/being honest.

        1. Yes Matildaclark – to honour all as equals

        2. Beautifully said Matilda. We are a role model of some sort or another the moment we step out of bed. What will I choose to reflect today?

        3. I really like that Jenny, ‘We are a role model of some sort or another the moment we step out of bed. What will I choose to reflect today?’ Absolute responsibility and opportunity!

218. I spoke to a little boy yesterday who had made that first step saying he did not want to do football training anymore, although he loved playing, because it was tough and hurt. People’s actions and words. Let’s let him be one of many to say this.

219. So spot on, Alexander1207 – I know I have spent a lot of time in the shadows pretending I wasn’t making choices and decisions, but every not spoken word, every ‘no’ is actually ‘Yes’ to not being engaged with humanity, not taking responsibility, not playing my part. Nowadays, in my life, not OK!

220. Such a great blog Matilda and it’s sad that children are learning so young the ways of societies silence and looking the other way in in relation to all that is not working, especially as they hold such an innocence and the potential to teach adults so much in this regard.

     1. Thank you, Michael. When I read the words ‘society’s silence’ I had this image of all our children muted by us and our unwillingness to hear what is really going on. It is a tragedy, made more so by our acceptance and therefore perpetuation of it.

     2. Yes Michael, by sweeping under the rug what is not said is not a harmless thing as it stays in our bodies and causes ill if it not expressed.

221. Matilda thank you for exposing and highlighting this issue.
     I am deepening my understanding and experiences of speaking up and how important it is to do just that.
     For me it is definitely a work in progress, however my commitment to speaking my truth is solid.
     It is my fervent hope that this culture, of not speaking up in the playground (and indeed everywhere) is turned around as quickly as possible; modelled by adults.

222. A powerful article Matilda, and much to ponder on. I’ve also been in an awkward tug of war between the social niceties I’ve been used to and the longing to express truth for the love of a humanity that deserves no less. There is a lot at stake which is why the game has been played for a long, long time, with something very deliberately manipulating us to believe that we will be stamped down for speaking up and standing tall. Fear is ingrained in us from when we were little from generation to generation. But there’s also the longing, the knowing of truth and a natural call to express the truth — the joy that is felt within and without is enormous. Life lived without truth being expressed is a life that is empty if the truth be really known…. we can fill ourselves up with things, distractions, toys for young and old, but deep down there will always be a longing, something missing if we stifle and dismiss speaking up for love and truth.
     So it’s a tug of war that is slowly but steadily being won for speaking up, because that life of emptiness, however tantalising and seductive it can seem, holds nothing in comparison to expressing and not holding back love.

     1. ‘…to express truth for the love of a humanity that deserves no less.’ Our responsibility in a nutshell. No ifs or buts, no excuses, no hiding…a life of continued longing or a return to that which we know…Love?

223. It is so very exposing how kids are adjusting and fitting into a constructed way of being. What happened to us and to kids just being themselves, not selling out but feeling the fire in our bodies when we speak up and say what ever is needed to be said. There are plenty of things going on in the world where we need to simply say no to. That is the start of a change we all know we want if we would be more honest about the state we are in.

224. “Are we hoping someone else will do something; are we making excuses for not putting our heads above the parapet to say “This is madness”, all the while trying to convince ourselves that it is all OK?”. Thank you Mathilda for asking these questions. I am learning like you to speak up, knowing that it begins with me. Shaking people out of their accepted normal feels as a very responsible and loving thing to do.

225. I recently had an experience of being bullied by another who was raising his voice to assert his dominance. It was at the point that I felt in my body that I was beginning to compete with this by raising my voice, and how awful this felt, that I realised I had to disengage and call a stop by stating that I felt I was being bullied and that the meeting was over, asking the other to “please leave”. It was my awareness of what was being inflicted on my body by my choices that supported me to stop the momentum building further.

226. The words, ‘Back in the playground the child shakes away their disbelief that no one else is seeing and feeling what they are seeing and feeling, and starts to normalise the things that are not OK: rough play, foul words, gender competition, cruelty to fellow human beings etc.’ so expose what our young people are experiencing on a daily basis. They innately know this is not how things are meant to be. This is where their shutting down of their awareness grows and where the seeds of social discontent are sown.

     Silence is not golden. Children need parents and teachers who provide space each day and encourage them to discuss what they see happening around them, if they are to stay confident and able to speak up about things that are not okay. How awesome to have this strength in adulthood, rather than choose whatever means is on hand to dull down all those suppressed feelings accumulated over the years simply because you haven’t spoken up and named the things that weren’t okay.

227. Matilda read this for a second time and I feel a resounding yes within me in knowing we can only truly change a thing if we are willing to see it and then speak up about it.

228. I feel that this message cannot be repeated enough for all of us and there is much to consider from it in how we live personally with our families to how we are in society in general. We are taught to tolerate the irresponsibility and lies of others we know are not true by saying nothing. Often to the point where we can say that we were not even aware it was going on… are we not teaching the next generation true ignorance here!

229. Super awareness Deanne. Thank you for voicing this.

230. ‘We are all in this together’ – this is a crunch quote and when we accept this fact in full it becomes so clear that we cannot hide in a comfy bubble. It also opens us up to the true beauty of brotherhood, so speaking up is not a burdensome duty but an accepting and appreciation of true relationship.

231. A sobering point, Brendan. What is the foundation we are laying for the future if we are not prepared to speak up about what we know is wrong and support our children to do the same?

232. Speaking up when we see or feel that something is wrong is so important. Otherwise the person feels they can get away with what they are saying, and this allows it to continue, or even escalate. As bystanders we contribute to the evil if we do not speak our truth – something I became acutely aware of when I first heard the quote in your article, many years ago now

     1. By playing small and not speaking up I thought that it was just a small thing and by letting things be was insignificant in the scheme of things. This for me was a total cop out and can see how damaging this behavior can be for myself and the fact that all of humanity misses out when we don’t express.

233. Thank you Matilda. This blog and the comments are inspiring me to speak up further about an abusive situation. If I don’t do this I am not letting the “abuser” know how unacceptable their actions and words really are – whether they choose to listen or not – at least I have spoken the truth as I know it to be.

234. “The playground scene is a brilliant micro of the world. If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative.”- so true Matilda. If we turn a blind eye to loveless behaviours we are saying yes to them and allowing them to become the norm.
     But by speaking up we can make a difference, if all united to speaking from truth.

235. The fear or discomfort of being pointed out, judged as different, is in truth a consequence of us learning to live a life where we ignore what we feel and where we confirm to others that it is ok to ignore what you feel. So, we learn to live a life where we train our bodies to suppress a huge portion of what we naturally feel. The completion of that training is not precisely a joyous moment since we have to live the consequences of living a life where we connect easily to what is not true and where there is much abnormality to be expected as accepted as normal. Recovering from this feeling-less is a crucial first step to see the rot it helps to create and to speak up that it is not ok.

236. It feels like not speaking up is an epidemic in the world at times and has become such an accepted way of being that no other way is known so if someone does speak up it is frowned upon and others are stunned into silence. However it hurts every single person to stay in this kind of behaviour..and it is time to call this out.

     1. Yes, I feel when someone rocks the boat and brings truth it’s frowned upon because it exposes us. Also I feel the pain of not expressing is not worth it and through our expression we all evolve.

237. “I feel clumsy as I flounder between these two things: the comfy, familiar habit of social niceties and rightness, and the emerging, urgent, ‘loving humanity’ demand for truth. So just in case I hesitate for a moment, I consider “What happens when I/we do not speak up?”
     Matilda,
     I fully understand what you are saying here, I too feel this. It is something that I am having to re wire, so to speak quite a lot, as the social niceties have definitely ruled up until now. I am finding many of the reasons why I have not spoken up are very quick to slip in, the familiarity of using these reasons is astounding me. It is great though to now be able to feel them, see them for what they are and choose instead to stand steady in what I feel.

     1. True Leigh, this is something I experience too, the ‘old’ way of not speaking up is there for me to pick up easily because my foundation has been build on security and safety. I am making the choice to become aware of these moments and to make another choice and with speaking up make a foundation of love, knowing every time I do speak up it is not for me but for everyone.

238. Albert Einstein spoke pure truth in saying that the world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. Matilda your message is a strong call to stand up and expose the evil, in all of its deceitful and cunning ways. This choice is ours in every moment to side with evil or to step out of hiding and allow the sheer power and strength of truth to be seen and felt in full.

239. The title of this blog is such a great reminder to ponder on this. When I don’t speak up I can feel that I am letting myself and others down as we don’t always get the opportunity to celebrate, appreciate or come to a level of honesty in our relationship with others.

240. Agree Lyndy, there is no doubt that this time will be celebrated in history as ‘the era when people began to speak up en masse’ thanks to Serge Benhayon presenting the Ageless Wisdom teachings which so many are now making their living way.

241. Thank you for the wake up call Matilda. “My polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade”. I’m part of the well oiled machinery of society with its niceties and politeness that keep it going. What the machinery needs is some creaky bolts and nuts that stop it in its tracks and force us to observe the damage done by being a compliant cog.

242. I have watched many a time when people have sat back allowed something that everything inside them tells them this is not okay, yet instead of speaking this, they smile pleasantly and play the game of using something else to justify their decision or why they couldn’t speak up. I have also watched situations where regardless of what comes at them, people will speak what they know to be true, I always respect this and its something I can trust and this is what creates the change that is needed.

     1. I too have admired those who can speak up with what they know to be true, however in my admiration I have somehow made it that I can not do the same. I have let myself believe that they are better, more informed than I am, yet what they speak, I know is true, because I too have felt it. Understanding this is a great support for if I too feel it, than I too am just as powerful as anyone that I admire. To add to this I have my way of saying things that can contribute greatly to all who I am with.

243. “I feel clumsy as I flounder between these two things: the comfy, familiar habit of social niceties and rightness, and the emerging, urgent, ‘loving humanity’ demand for truth.”

     Totally relate to the swing between the familiar (the old) and the new, to the awkwardness of what or how to express this feeling of things not being right – that feeling which has previously been overridden, ignored or dismissed – and to now have the quiet determination to address a ‘wrong’ situation there and then.

     “I can start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside … ”

     … to practise expressing consistently and maybe imperfectly, but to keep practising nonetheless and to never stop, may be the key to overcoming that clumsiness.

244. Such golden gems coming from such a great article. Rebecca you pretty much summed up the state of mental health and addictions today. No one is truly ill, we live contracted from our true state of being, fearful to express, shut down and withdraw and from this state mental ill health is possible. Support our children from young to stay connected and express and we immediately start to decrease illness and disease.

     1. Caroline thank you for sharing your insights from Matilda’s article. The rate of anxiety and overwhelm is alarming to read and see in our society. This blog is great at sharing how we can approach life in another way. Taking small steps to express leads to great steps in surrendering and the possibility to releasing the levels of contractions many are feeling.

245. Your blog Matilda is powerful in so many ways, the state of the world we live in is because nearly everyone holds back from speaking up and as a result we end up on slippery slope of ill becoming normal. I said this before but everyone should read this blog, this is what true education should be about.

     1. Absolutely Samantha! Einstein’s observation about speaking up should be the News Headline for the 21st century. It is the key wisdom for the new era. I just keep feeling this incredible joy joy joy!

246. Thank you Alison, I agree, it is like a dog eat dog environment, with very few standing up and committing to praise or appreciate another, or at least being honest about another! Truth delivers a platform to stand on! Then we have an opportunity to share openly without shutting down our true expression!

247. Thank you Matilda, it makes absolute sense to allow true expression to start at a young age so we do not learn to shut down but instead to talk through our issues. Through not expressing, all I felt was bottled up inside!

248. When we do not speak up, we help contribute to the rot that is going on in our society. It is so ingrained in us to ‘play nice’, to ‘tow the party line’, to not stand up for what is the truth. It is so very important to express from what we feel, sometimes this is not going to be popular, sometimes this is going to rock the boat, so it is important to express in a way that meets people where they are at and to not be advasarial for the sake of it. But it is important to bring truth, to speak what you feel and give it a go and speak up.

249. This is a great point you make Jinya that the level of self-worh has a direct correlation on how we express, or not, and how that then impacts on others. As Matilda shows in this blog it all starts with how we are educated as children.

250. A deep-to-the-bone shocker, Ariana. First, that we do it to the extent that we do. Second, that pretty much every other person on the planet does it too. And third, that it can be so hard to stop! The prison, for myself at least, is this last one. I can recognise that there is a change I go into with some people, and to be honest it is far less now than it used to be, but there are still situations and certain people who I will modulate myself for when I am around them. So, it often feels like I’m still in the prison of my own making, but occasionally I am on day release.

251. Expression can be a contagious thing. We can inspire one another to express more and be true to what we are feeling.

     1. Very true Jinya. When we dare to just share from our hearts, this can inspire another to open up and not hold back their expression too.

     2. How true Jinya. Once we speak up it is as if it opens the floodgates for others to say how they feel. Other people hear that it is not only them who has misgivings about what is going on, or , alternatively, not only them who is so appreciating someone’s contribution to the project (or whatever) and that it is just so expansive to express in this way. Yes Jinya, expressing is beautifully contagious!

     3. So true Samantha – every time we make that step and express it makes an invisible but very tangible footprint of empowerment for everyone to feel – then the support is there, holding the person to speak up themselves. How the joy multiplies!

     4. So true Jenny. When we see those around us expressing themselves with truth it inspires us to go that next layer with ourselves and to keep unfolding the next moment to be discovered. It really is beautiful as you say and leaves the world in a much grander place.

252. At my secondary school we discuss the silent bystander when bullying is happening and how it is not ok. This notion to not be a bystander is expected of the students yet not modelled by the teachers as many see a system that does not work but very few are willing to call this out. We all need to start lovingly calling things out. I feel people all over the world have tried to speak up, protest etc but have a sense of giving up, with a nothing ever changes attitude. But we can see that many courageous people through out history have changed the course of many lives through standing up for truth. We must all want to know and feel truth for there to be truth and ever lasting change in the world.

     1. Thanks Tracy. With regard to the people who have gone out and protested but nothing seems to change, its because they go out in complete misery, unhappiness and hurt by the way the world is and try and change it, but havent dealt with their reaction to the world. When one turns inwardly and starts to adress things that are not true, thats when they can truly change the world because they walk in life with a different energy. That is truly powerful.

253. The world would be a completely different place if we practiced speaking the truth we were born to naturally express. That we compromise ourselves, our relationships and our lives for the easy option of not rocking the boat is why we find ourselves where we are today, with so much disharmony obvious in so many way, be it war, slavery, pornography, dysfunctional relationships, arrangements with friends and work colleagues, cyber abuse, the list goes on and on. All of these major and minor occurrences result from not speaking up about what it is we really feel.

     1. ‘the truth we were naturally born to express’ – BINGO – it is all there, ready and waiting and what ever the spur is that takes us back to this full, real, truthful form of communication should be pounced on and put into action with relish.

254. I agree Ariana it is shocking when I consider quite how much I have and do modify how I am so I ‘fit in’ with others. When I catch myself doing it now it is a blessing because I have the opportunities to change that behaviour, and the more I do it the more content I feel within myself as it confirms and honours me, rather than simply pandering to the outside world or other people.

255. I found the same alexander1207, I used to think not speaking up would get me through life but all it did and does is leave me frustrated with a built up and unexpressed energy wanting to get out. I would also have endless thoughts in my head, I should have said this or that and so it exhausted me long after the event or conversation. The more I simply say what is there is to be said the clearer my thoughts are and the less I think about previous conversations as I completed them at the time and so the more present I am with myself.

     1. I agree Lyndy relationships flourish when we simply speak what we feel and do not hold back. Crazily enough I used to hold back out of fear of being rejected and losing the friendships/relationships! Now the more I allow people in and say what I feel the closer I feel to others and others feel to me. No longer do I feel I need to get through life, or get through it alone rather I now embrace and enjoy life.

        1. Utterly true and gorgeous James.

256. For me the bigger picture is that if I do not speak up and share what needs to be said, then that makes it okay for everyone else to do the same. Thanks to Universal Medicine I now understand and am living more and more each day with this amazing responsibility. I have seen the most simple and profound affects of how one person speaking up opens the doors for everyone else, and more often than not we feel the same. I know for one I have and still do at times, walk about holding onto so many unsaid things, surely this is doing a great damage to our physical body, our health and well being, relationships, work places , family life, communities …. media, government policies ….. everything really.

     1. Yes Gyl, I too see the bigger picture. As a secondary school teacher I hear daily teachers discussing their grave concerns about policies and new things being introduced and yet no one speaks up. I have spoken directly to my Heads of Department and the Principal on topics that concern me and everyone is very surprised and says quite openly, ‘there’s no way I could do that’. There is this deal it seems that despite everyone seeing what’s happening is wrong and doesn’t work, we just have to toe the party line and go with what the powers to be at the time say. If 25 000 teachers in the state of Queensland stood up and called out the loveless curriculum and policies then the Education system would dramatically change. Cast this calling out on all professions (and actions) from nursing, to the police, to politicians, trades etc and we would start to see some amazing changes across the world. It feels we have given up because the task of change is too big now. The damage of not speaking up is much greater than I think we can even imagine. Not speaking up has allowed wars, famine, corruption and the many loveless ways that keep humanity divided. It is time to truly call things out for what they are and to express the truth.

        1. Totally agree. No one profession is greater than another. I know teachers at my school who do not address or greet the cleaners for they feel superior to them. I’ve always wondered how teachers would feel without their rooms cleaned and vacuumed and the windows all spotless. Their job is just as important as mine as is with any job that is in service to humanity. If we do our job with love then we are all doing our part.

     2. I am learning that as well Gyl Rae, the feelings that I have are there to be expressed, they are not for us to keep to ourselves. we have the power and responsibility to contribute our truth to the world around us, if we witness something unloving, we can say something that will bring love to the interaction. this is healing, saying nothing is harming.

257. “What Happens When We Do Not Speak Up?” I cant help but read the title and the words “it hurts” comes up. Actually physically in my body to hold back or onto the truth of what needs to be said, whether it is something I have felt, seen or heard. It doesn’t mean I have to go running around saying it out loud to everybody, at times yes a verbal spoken word is what needs to be said, at other times it can be as simple as observing the truth of what’s really going in and saying it to myself. In every case we are confirming and speaking up for what we know to not be truth or love in this world.

     1. Gyl I have noticed that when I simply observe what is true and not true quite often this can be more powerful than words as people around us feel this awareness we have in their body and there can be no war of words trying to defend what is not true when this happens.

258. A resounding YES to that, Doug. Classrooms the world over are touched by the teacher who lets love out! No, the education system does not support open, respectful and loving relationships, but I am endlessly inspired by what I observe in school: the fact that the system is smaller than the power of one person making loving choices in their classroom (child or adult).

259. I LOVE this, Alison, the power of appreciation in action – congratulations and thank you – this is what everyone is yearning for and it simply takes one to break the silence.

260. Your speaking up to appreciate your colleague in that email is gorgeous Alison. It is healing for that colleague, for the Manager, for you and for everyone else that read it. I have now taken to answering surveys sent out by various companies such as Westnet, or Apple et . asking about the service you got. I not only fill out the ticks of excellence (if this has been the case as it usually is) but I fill up the box where you can make extra comments – with every little detail of how professional, how caring, and how the person went that one extra step to provide a great service. I find I get the best, almost miraculous service everywhere I go these days, and if I do get not great service I just hold the love with the withdrawn or distracted server and bring all of me to them.

261. Rebecca I can relate to what you have expressed.
     I too learnt from young it was safer to stay quiet than speaking up for fear of being attacked, eg verbal abuse from others. But in doing this I was saying Yes to abuse. This is not Ok.
     I also had internalised my fear, anger, and deep hurt around this issue. This created dis- ease in my body as I got older, and mistrust in people. I then chose to not let people in.
     Thankfully today I am learning to express more from love and truth and in doing so I am letting people in

262. Speaking up is an uncomfortable process when we aren’t used to it but as you point out Matilda, it simply isn’t OK to turn a blind eye, thinking that it’s someone else’s problem or that we can’t make a difference anyway. What we see going on in the world is something that we have all had a hand in creating so I agree – time to put aside the fears and speak up when and where it’s needed.

     1. Well said gilesch, speaking up can at first be daunting but it is important we do not simply cower away and let things go on when we know they are not loving. Often people can get so caught up in what they are doing they do not realise quite how abusive or unloving they are being. It is then when they really need someone to stand up and say no that’s not love so they can have an opportunity to look at the way they are. Otherwise we just keep doing more and more extreme behaviours thinking we can get away with it, in reality we can’t but our minds can let us think whatever we want! So yes no holding back speaking the truth – if we do not only do we suffer the lack of expression so to does the person needing to hear it.

263. Hello Alison Pearson and I agree it is important to speak up with care in systems that aren’t supporting people. I also would like to highlight the “we don’t appreciate each other enough” part of your comment. I see that this is an important part as I see most people are just happy to be spoken to with care let alone appreciated. It doesn’t take much to say thank you and for many it was possibly the way they grew up but it seems we have a society that is putting a lot of pressure on perfection and striving but forgetting the simplicity of just appreciating what’s in front of you, even in it’s simplest form. If we are always focusing on the ‘what we don’t like’ part then it is possible that is all we see. It’s absolutely needed for things to be exposed that are going on that don’t support people but equally and as you say Alison it’s important to appreciate what’s there as well. Both support equally in breaking down anything, including systems. Any system after all and as we know are just made up of people. Thank you Alison.

     1. Totally Ray. It’s ‘people first’ as has been highlighted by Universal Medicine, which wins the people’s choice awards hands down. A system that does not have ‘people first’ is an imposition and a prison. A system either serves the people or it doesn’t. Most people complain about the ‘systems’ so it is something that we all know about first hand. It’s in our hands to be the love and care that we are and not try and bandaid the system, as you say Ray.

264. This article is very powerful and holds so much truth Matilda.
     ‘The playground scene is a brilliant micro of the world. If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative.’
     This is not acceptable and yet we excuse it as it is so common.
     Silence is consent. It’s time to speak up and cut through the evil and the changes start within us all.

     1. Yes silence is consent. How often are we consenting to behaviour that our whole being knows is wrong by not speaking up for what is true?

     2. Silence is consent. A bullying policy at my school calls out the bystander as equal to the bully. It is saying that if you stand by and doing nothing you are just as big a part of the problem as the bully, and I for one, agree with this notion. We cannot be silent in the face of lies being spoken in our world for we are then left to live amongst the illusion of those lies.

        1. This is powerful Tracey. Observing another person bully and not speak is cowardly and yet we have all done it. Especially when we measure something as ‘not so bad’. It leaves a poison in our body. Speaking the truth is so liberating and our only way home.

        2. That’s right kathrynfortuna, we have all done it and we somehow justify it. I think oh well I would have just made others around me uncomfortable if I spoke up about that, or I don’t want to cause a confrontation and we justify it in our heads that it was probably best left unsaid. Now I speak up a lot more. I know it can make others comfortable, even when I know they agree with my words, but too many of us have been conditioned to stand by and silently allow abuse to happen. It’s like it is simply an accepted way of being and I can sometimes feel helpless to change it so why create a social setting that is awkward for people. With a growing confidence in speaking up I am noticing that this can create a real healing for all involved.

265. Alison what you have shared is so equally profound and simple. Appreciation of each other is invaluable and everyone and thing can unfold with this. It offers space for something to come next. As opposed to criticism and focusing on what doesn’t work has a denseness that doesn’t invite flow and seems to need push and effort to get through.

266. Like you Alison. I was also bullied at school on a daily basis, verbally and physically. I told my parents what was going on and their advice was, ‘you have learn to deal with it’.
     So I buried my hurt and numbed myself to the abuse but felt guilty in some way because I had actually started the abuse by trying to stop the bullies from stealing my friend’s money every day.
     I have shared this story before, and shared it again recently with a group at the Sacred Esoteric Healing Level 5 course. I have also read and commented on this blog before, but it is only from reading your comment this morning that I realize there is another layer found and another layer of protection removed.

267. What you say is interesting Rebecca, how as a child you found it really hard to express. As a kid in England in the fifties, I also found it hard to express because we were taught that children should be seen and not heard and this just shut down communications with our parents. Have we let this happen to subsequent generations?

268. To speak up starts already by simply acknowledging what one feels and in situations that do not feel ok just say: ‘Hey, something is wrong here.’ This causes a stop and everybody can reevaluate what is truly going on. This also stops the tension as it is addressed though it may be not yet nail where it comes from but becoming aware and expressing where it comes form is then the second part of ‘speaking up’.

269. Matilda, you speak for ‘all of us’ when you say “I can start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside, OR I can continue to play the social game”. This is a choice that every one faces every day. Unfortunately too many in society choose the easy path ‘and continue to play the social game’ with dire consequences later in life when their bodies start to reflect their ill-choices. Once one starts to practice coming from a truth that is known inside, then this path is not only the easier but brings a flow and harmony to life and to the body expressing truth. There is also the added consequence that society begins to change and truth starts to become the norm instead of the ill-behaviour which is currently ‘normalised’ as society stands by and does nothing.

     1. And another great danger is it offers the opportunity for people to doubt their inner knowing of what they know to be true. This is true evil and by not speaking up we are creating the space for this evil to exist.

270. I keep coming back to this powerful and revealing blog, and today was further considering how we seem to get tricked into imagining there is this ‘harmless’ ‘grey’ area of polite apathy we sit in – where we do not directly seem to perpetrate harm — but what I have discovered is that each of us, in every moment either adds to the many ills humanity is facing, or we offer another way, with no fence sitting or convenient comfortable cushioned middle ground.
     The Albert Einstein quote is a real eye opener, that calls the bystander out as being the very one who underpins and provides the foundations for all that is not loving in the world – here is another similar quote (from D. Bonheoffer) that reminds me there is no harmless grey comfortable onlooker place to silently sit by:
     “Silence in the face of evil is itself evil: Not to speak is to speak. Not to act is to act.”

     1. Beautifully said Kate. We are always playing a part, whether speaking or silent. There is no hiding as we all are part of one humanity. Being silent, when there is a need to express is like sitting there in a group with a big grey rug thrown over one’s head and believing that no one can see you.

271. What happens when we habitually don’t speak up is we either implode or explode, it never ends in a great result.

272. I agree Brendan I feel we need to have an open community group about what we accept as ‘normal’. We may then see how ludicrous much of what we call ‘normal’ is. It was so called ‘normal’ when I was growing up for both parents to smoke in the car with the windows up and 4 kids in the back, none of which were wearing seat belts.

273. Matilda, I love all you have exposed here in your blog. The words of Albert Einstein you have quoted are so true “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” You have given an extremely exposing example with how children now seem to be unwilling to speak out about abuse in the playground. Yes, society does not like to see people snitching and will often turn on these people. It is so plain to see that they become so used to this sort of behaviour and eventually accept it as normal in the world. Unfortunately most people who are upset about this behaviour still hold back from saying anything. Very few have the courage to speak up and say it is not acceptable. But it is open to us all to not accept this behaviour and speak up. It is the only way that we are going to change the awful things that go on.

274. This is a good point Alexander. Speaking up does not have to be difficult if we truly feel what is going on in the moment. We can then simply express it because we have felt it to be true. Anything else needs to be calculated and thought out before speaking, and is simply a complication. Best to keep it simple!

275. So true. The silencing, e.g.not speaking up, is abuse in itself. We become a witness of abuse from there on. I have experienced that no matter how much ‘time passes’ or distance is created between me and the situation where I have not spoken up – it stays, even seems to grow like an itch to a tumor. It just doesn’t leave me in a way. Sometimes it takes courage to speak up, even if it is something which could have been expressed at the start. Every moment is an opportunity, a doorway for a next level of truth.

276. Very well said Ariana – I agree, there’s no place you can ‘hide’ from being a part of humanity

277. Thank you Alison Pearson, by expressing your experiences with abuse and ridicule and how you were taught to ignore and ‘rise above’ it I’ve felt how this has been the start of my strategy. How I’ve used this as a form of protection and this was the beginning of building my castle where no one could reach me and I only came out when it felt safe. The castle is more like a prison, every time I express and do speak up I feel how everyone benefits and it feels spacious and it is freeiing myself out of my self build castle.

278. A beautiful balance offered Alison, thank you. We were discussing exactly that on a meeting yesterday, saying that it is vital that we express our appreciation of each other and then, if and when we do need to call something out, there is already established a platform of love from which to come.

279. Hi Jinya I was drawn to your comment about ‘not speaking up’ – and suddenly my memory went to a couple of examples where I ‘chose’ to not speak up. My memory of these situations is clear, and I remember thinking ‘this is not okay – what is going on here – this cannot be right”, but like a thin reed in a fast flowing creek I bowed to the moment believing that this or that person knew more than me, so I had better just keep my mouth shut, and as you say, “not be a party pooper” no matter how uncomfortable the situation caused me to feel. Yes, I see now the word ‘feel’ was key and I was not answering its’ call. Why is it that we at times in our life ‘think’ we are so unempowered, so caught in a situation where it appears that we have to just go along with it. I wonder at times why it took me so long to listen to, or more truthfully act on what my inner feelings were telling me – seemingly held in a sense of paralysis of not being able to speak up or flee. I sense my then lack of self worth caused this belief that resulted in my paralysis that had me held in a belief that I was not able to speak up, How freeing it feels now to know God, that God was not ever not with me, and to know that it is okay to know God and to act on his/her impulse. This awareness for me has only been so since I met Serge Benhayon and began attending the Universal Medicine presentations.

280. Not expressing simply builds frustration within the body. This happens ever so slightly until something occurs as suddenly there is an outburst that often seems extreme or over the top. So the key thing is to not personalise anything that happens in life that comes from others, but to read the fact that they are releasing the pressure of their own frustration from a lack of expression.

     1. Yippee! Love this observational reading Matthew. Freeing ourselves from personalising is a huge liberation and so helps understanding, not reaction or judgment, to be the basis of our expression.

281. I still hear grown up people choosing to hold back because it does not feel safe enough to express what they are feeling. It is the same playground scenario that keeps repeating itself in all areas of live. If we hold back and do not express everything that it is not right, we will keep on reflecting this to our children and they will follow the same pattern and so the cycle continues over and over again in all areas of our lives. So the only way to stop this is to express and nominate everything that is not loving or true.

282. That’s so true Ariana. I’ve seen it in myself and others that if there’s any holding onto wanting to keep the peace then we’re effectively walking around with a ball and chain tied to our foot. I’ve seen it come out as expressions of self-doubt- I don’t know if it’s ok to say this, or guilt or some kind of fog.

     There’s no freedom in being like this, our wings are always clipped until we step forth and no-longer choose wanting things a certain way when we express what is calling to be expressed.

283. This is an amazing blog not only because it exposes an evil we have turned a blind eye to but because in turning the blind eye we have accepted this way of living and yes it is a rot. Im a father of 2 beautiful children. I encourage them to speak up at school and at home when a behaviour is not ok. Yes this isn’t popular but to what extent have we allowed levels of abuse in our behaviours to become popular just so we dont disrupt the status quo? It all starts by speaking up.

284. I remember this so well as a child, hearing and seeing things from adults that just did not make sense to me, that often would feel as an outright lie. I would look around and no one else seemed to be seeing what I was so eventually I made my self wrong. I then started to shut down so I could fit into what was deemed as ‘normal’ Thank goodness for Universal Medicine which supported me to re-connect back to me and to be able to trust what I know to be true and to find my voice again in a world that needs strong voices to reflect back to them the choice they are living in; with that awareness people can choose to change or not.

285. Great point Michelle, I so agree. This is definitely not what responsibility is about.

286. Thanks Matilda, your blog exposes the truth that everybody can feel, but few want to talk about. The choices we make, every little decision throughout the day, either bring us back to love and truth or they take us further away, it is possible to get so far away that love is a myth and truth is cloudy at best. I know for myself that truth alone is not enough, for if it comes with being right or making another less, it is only harming. So the ability to express with love to the best of my ability, is an ongoing choice, that the more I do, the more it becomes clearer and easier to do. How about that!

     1. Thats great Mark! It is like blowing through old pipes and clearing them out and each time we do it again the clarity and flow increases incrementally. Love and truth are one. If there is no love in the utterance then truth is not transmitted, only a distorted version of the situation. Truth always heals and sets us free!

287. When we do not speak up we allow a corrupt world to continue unabated. There is no superhero that will come and save us. We have to save ourselves and the only way we can do that is by speaking up about what is not ok in the world. Too many things have become “normal” when there is nothing normal about them at all.

     1. So true Elizabeth. We have such power in our hands when we speak up! As you say, no one is going to come and save us from this mess. We are all our saviours as we take the courage and express what we all know is true. We all want to love and be loved, we all enjoy a harmonious work situation, we all know what’s true and what is not, so let’s be it and say it.

288. Such a powerful blog Matilda and I love the quote of Einstein’s that you finish with ‘The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.’ That really says it all, In their hurts and irresponsibility people will do terrible things. Thing from which greed, corruption, murder and rape are born as well as atrocities closer to home, such as deliberate exclusion, spreading rumours, bullying, all of which occur between our children in the playground. But we don’t teach our young to speak up against playground evils so how are they expected to speak out against the big stuff when they enter adulthood?

289. So true, Alison. It is so important to speak up when things aren’t truly serving and also when they are in appreciation. There is so much lack of self appreciation and that of others, which is a huge shame as we equally all have so much to share with each other and when someone holds back ,whether it be to appreciate or call out, we all learn from it, and it can be very healing.

290. I used to speak up as a child .. quite a lot I think, it was because I could see everyone around me carrying on as ‘normal’ that in the end I felt it was useless to speak out so kept quiet instead.

291. This is a great point Doug in what is the current education system teaching our children? It seems more about stats, grades and achievements and now starting from a really young age. I know there are some teachers that genuinely put the children/young people first but we have a long way to go with this. As Matilda has shared it is not just what is going on in schools – or could it be it is still going on in schools because we (humanity) haven’t spoken up when we have needed to? In the end it is up to all of us to speak out and make the changes needed lovingly so.

292. Or alternatively Michelle, as I was prone to do in the past when I didn’t speak up was to blurt everything I had held in, all at once to the utter surprise of the person I was directing this to, as they never knew that I felt that way. How could they if I never spoke up in the moment? This was damaging for me and for those around me. The need to express as things are being felt is of utmost importance as they then get let go of and are not held as tension in the body.

293. Not speaking up feels awful physically in your body, it’s like carrying this big unsaid weight around with you.

     1. I agree Gyl Rae, not speaking up does feel very uncomfortable in your body and can bring a double whammy when you then judge yourself for not speaking up at the time. Better to say it when it’s there to be said and not hold it in.

     2. So true Gyl. When I don’t speak up I feel heavy and contracted. When I do speak up and express how I feel, I feel light and expansive.

294. This article is true journalism. I wrote an article a while back that touched on similar themes – on misogyny and the ‘sliding scale’ of abuse, and you powerfully describe a similar realisation here. That we look at the so called more extreme disharmony ‘over ‘there” and use it to justify, accept and give up on the apparent ‘lesser’ disharmony in our households and playgrounds.
 You similarly also highlight that our actions always have power, we always have a responsibility to either silently endorse the status quo or to feel the ills and speak, to live in a way that to the best of our ability does not add to nor endorse the not at all ‘normal’ that we have allowed to become all too ‘common’ – AND – in our silence endorsing its every worsening descent.


295. Thank you Matilda, I agree not talking up is a sure sign that we are willing to neglect our self and others; demonstrating a distinct lack of responsibility. I love the quote you used. . . “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Albert Einstein

296. Matilda, I have recently had a first hand experience of the consequences of not speaking up and I realise now that originally I actually thought that I was doing the right thing by keeping the status quo in tact, but I was in fact simply not wanting to see the truth because then I would have to take responsibility and actually say something. And when I eventually did, I had left it so long the situation was far bigger than it needed to be and therefore far harder and actually more painful to address.

297. Very true Ariana, and to top it off it feels awful in our body. It’s almost like an unspoken physical rant going on inside. That never ending record player in our head. We are carrying around all this unsaid unexpressed stuff that at some point almost self combusts – either outwardly or inwardly, at the point we cannot hold onto everything we have ignored or not expressed anymore. I have found that its better to, most times say it there and then, rather than let it explode later on down the line, as often I have made it into a mountain instead of a grain of sand.

298. I have relied on someone else to speak up in the past, not wanting to stand out or be picked on, wanting someone else to blow the whistle. We have all behaved in this way and when no-one does, we can all feel the consequences. It’s time for me to change my ways, stand up and be counted.

     1. I did the same Gill, relying on someone else to speak up, I even spoke about what I saw to someone I trusted she or he would speak up and manipulate them to do so. I could stay hidden and safe. Or I would look for others who would feel the same as I did and together with others I felt supported to speak up but most of the times I would not be the one doing the speaking but I would stay in the background. As you say Gill time to change my ways and donot hold back truth any longer.

299. “The playground scene is a brilliant micro of the world. If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel” – absolutely agree, well said and a great blog

300. What happens when we don’t speak up is that we allow evil to take hold and grow and become the new normal.

301. “I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.” Holding back our expression is damaging to body, and others miss out on the opportunity to hear our truth and wisdom.

302. What we allow in the playground of our youth is what we will have in the ‘playground’ of our life at large. I love your blog Matilda Clark, and all that you expose within it.

303. When we do not acknowledged the war at play deep within, we are forever at the mercy of a blindness that seeks to cloud our vision as to where the seed of harm lies. “…we carry on regardless of the hurt and chaos. Heads down, eyes averted in case we see the same confusion and/or pain in someone else’s eyes and have to feel our own.” Very well said Matilda.

304. Very true Brendan. What is ‘common’ is not what is ‘normal’. We confuse these terms. It is normal to be love and act accordingly, not in a soft, fluffy escapist way but in a way that says: Hey wait, you are love and I am too and what we are doing is not in accordance to this and therefore is definitely NOT normal and therefore not ok.

     1. I agree Liane, the power of bringing everything back to the simple fact of I am love you are too – what we are doing isn’t love – could you imagine every argument, disagreement, disharmony no matter how big or small being addressed from this fundamental truth. Why do we waste so much time attacking one another is various shapes and ways, when at the basis of it all we all want the same, to be loved.

     2. Hi Liane, in the dictionary common means occurring, found, or done often, normal means conforming to a standard, the confusion comes from the thesaurus which places them under the same heading, wrong!
        I love your definition, “It is normal to be love and act accordingly, not in a soft, fluffy escapist way but in a way that says: Hey wait, you are love and I am too”. It is definitely not so common outside of Universal Medicine circles.

305. We learn from a very young age not to speak up with incidences such as what you have described here Matilda in the playground or at home for various reasons and then we carry this learnt behaviour of not expressing into adulthood. I can relate to this and it wasn’t until Universal Medicine that I began to question the effects that not speaking up has had on my body and my energy levels. When we start to look at the reasons as to why we have not spoken up in the first place we can then heal those hurts and it becomes much easier to explore our natural expression and speak truth again.

306. When I read “Are we hoping someone else will do something; are we making excuses for not putting our heads above the parapet to say “This is madness”, all the while trying to convince ourselves that it is all OK?” I became quiet. I combined it with the fact that we ‘learn’ our children to not speak up. This is actually crazy and very sad. Where’s the support to speak up in all their innocence and fragility. No wonder I have become silent myself. And fact is that if I don’t (re-learn) to speak up – which I’m learning – that the children who meet me also don’t feel encouraged or supported to express themselves. In this way Our school sytem is setting each and every child up to NOT be themselves. No wonder that there’s hardly anyone who’s confident and Truly joyful on a day-to-day basis. What is actually revealed to me here is that it is actually Amazing to work together with Our children to start making schools a place where everyone can express freely. There’s an absolute Joy in this.

307. Wow in a way feeling uncomfortable by reading this. I know I haven’t been speaking up many times, waiting for someone else to do it or thinking that I will do it later. The later often never comes! I can now see if I would like the world to be a more loving place and how I know it in truth could be, I can make a change by speaking up. As indeed what happens when I do not speak up? A great responsibility.

308. Anything that silences our truth is a deliberate evil that perpetuates everything that is not love in this world.

309. i can really feel now that not speaking up for truth can harm my body. Polite silence isn’t an option anymore, full stop.

310. Brilliant powerful article Matilda – true journalism. The school playground as an example of what you demonstrate here is hugely poignant – as it is here we so often begin the slide into blind siding our awareness of everything we see and feel that is so very glaringly not loving from a child’s huge ‘awakeness’ to every ripple.
     The learned mechanism of not speaking up, is one of accepting (resigning to or giving up) and making normal that which is actually not normal at all, just common.

311. “I can start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside”. Well said Matilda and this is what the students of the Livingness practice on a daily basis. Each of us can indeed make a difference and “the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching” than we can possibly imagine.

312. I agree Ariana, one wonders how it has been apparently so easy to do for so long – that is to just look the other way – identifying that whatever it is is none of our business – I feel it’s no wonder we live in such a complex and chaotic environment. But I thank God that it seems that we have been given this key that we threw away long ago, and I feel it is quite a glorious experience now being given insight to the fact, through the Ageless Wisdom teachings shared by Serge Benhayon, that we do have a choice to express, and that there is indeed another way to be.

313. It is very true that we need to speak up, but what I have learned from Universal Medicine is that how we speak is of the utmost importance. I cannot be heard if I am in any reaction within myself to what I am feeling. It is about accepting what is felt without holding any blame or judgments as to whether it is good or bad, right or wrong and from that place alone if I simply express what was felt all the protection that others are holding seems to melt away and no matter how challenging what is being shared is it can be heard and felt in that moment.

     1. Absolutely Kathleen. The magic that opens the doors to true communication is in the ‘how’ we speak up, in the quality of that speaking up. If there is blame or judgment. as you say, this usually immediately provokes a reaction in the other and stops communication right there and then, for example, ‘Don’t be a telltale’. Everything goes down the drain from hereon.

     2. So true Kathleenbaldwin it is so important how and when we express. I know at times I have said things at the totally wrong time or from reaction. Neither works as people are unable to let in what you are saying even if it may be what they need to hear. When I am connected to myself and reading where the person is at and what they will be able to handle then I can deliver the truth in a way that is a healing for the person.

314. What Happens When We Do Not Speak Up?:
     I am now suffering the consequences of what happens when one does not speak up in a relationship, and I have to remember your sentence: “my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade. Not OK!” Polite silence to not spoil a holiday, to not spoil a moment, and most times to avoid rejection, to avoid been left, to avoid being alone. I think that love can heal anything, and it is true, but love is not softness to make everything ok. Love is not tolerance of abuse. Love is saying whatever is in the way so the space is clear for the love to even be there.

315. What you present here Matilda is extremely important and something that is so deeply entrenched that people don’t even see that there is a global problem. How has it got so far away from the truth and for there to be so much violence and abuse on a daily basis to be ignored. This is not normal and it is not what life is about. To be in a world that this is accepted as normal is very sad state of affairs. I have started to speak up on what I see as abuse and the more we all do then is it possible that changes will happen?

316. WOW. Not speaking up about the rot that is going on in front of our eyes in an enormous expression to feel and ponder on. I too know that I feel my most truthful and loving of all others when I do speak up against an obvious wrong, and when I choose to speak from ‘me’ and not from my head.
     Thank you Matilda

317. I completely agree. Absolutely every expression of truth counts and sets a new way forth. It feels fabulously spacious in my body to express, even about the small things.

     1. Yes agreed Johanna, as someone very wise said recently… ‘everything is something and nothing is nothing’. In other words there is nothing small, it all counts. Express the truth with the small things and it’s a lot easier when something bigger comes along… a bit like a muscle that’s already warmed up!

     2. Thank you Jenny for sharing this, it is true, there is nothing small it all counts – I have often dismissed the power of this. There is a saying “take care of the small things and the big things will look after themselves”.

     3. Yes I agree the more I am expressing the more I am able to express and the easier it is to get myself out of the way and say what needs to be said, not what I think I need to write. It takes me for ever to write a comment when ever I am trying to write ‘something good’

     4. If we don’t express the small stuff in our relationships, they build into bigger issues, or a small incidence seems to be blow out of proportion…a molehill blown up into a mountain…because of all the times something wasn’t expressed, the one time it is, it comes loaded with all of that which hasn’t and needed to be expressed.

318. As a child I felt the crushing of my expression. The lack of freedom to share what I was observing and feeling. Instead I chose to play the nice game. As I have felt the effects of that in my body I know the importance of allowing others to have their space to express. I too try to give my daughter and children as many opportunities as I can to feel they can express openly without reservation.

319. Yes, Beverley, maybe it started in the playground and something very strong that keeps me silent is the need to ‘keep up’ some kind of appearance…I feel it in my conversations as a ‘brake’ in myself and others when we are getting to the core of things. The pattern we have set up, to maintain some kind of facade is a powerful one. Totally surmountable if we choose.

320. Brilliant, Elizabeth, thank you for that spur and clarity. It is uncomfortable and awkward for me to speak up but only because I have cemented myself through past choices into an inertia that now needs to be shaken off; even though we know they do not serve, old habits like to hang around!

321. And for me, if I apply that simple choice to every moment: truth v. convenience, all the complication and struggle evaporates. It really is that simple and clear. Thank you, sarahflenley.

322. ‘…and in comes responsibility’ – this is so spot on, Suzanne. I have artfully ducked and dived responsibility because I knew I would have to ‘fess up to all the choices I have made that have been out of sync with my natural wisdom and therefore out of sync with the world. I have done this because I have also been stuck in the mindset that says looking back over past ill choices equals blame. Supported by Universal Medicine I am coming to understand, and live, that without taking responsibility I am not free to make the next choice and that being honest about the part I have played to date, and super understanding about the choices I have made, is a key part in being inspired in the next moment/choice/step.

323. Thank you, Emilia. If we lift off the word playground we all know this silent resignation permeates all our lives and that this settles into an apathy that, in its inaction perpetuates what flows against our innate nature of working and living as one unified humanity with a common purpose that includes and serves all.

324. I can so relate to what you say Raegan about not speaking up because of making sure that we ‘get it right’. I know, for me, that I have in the past been so afraid of being humiliated for sounding stupid or not professional enough as I could never master that professional way of talking and expressing! I was in comparison. Little did I realise that I just had to feel what was going on, read the situation and then speak, from love and without judgment, about what I have observed. A you so beautifully say, we can be courageous and honour ourselves and others – the simplicity of this is felt.

325. Wow Oliver – what you have said has somehow highlighted (again!) that we have been living in a society that keeps things under-wraps, well hidden, not honest, showing how much we live a lie to protect our hurts.
     The teacher could have chosen not call you a ‘snitch’ but to have instead chosen to help the student who was cheating – maybe because that child had stuff going on at home, maybe they needed glasses and couldn’t see the blackboard, maybe they couldn’t follow the way the teachers had explained the subject – it could any number of reasons why that child was pressed to cheat to get through and a loving talk would have brought understanding and a way to address what was happening without traumatising the student.
     One might ask, why did that teacher adopt that idea about ‘snitching’ and what did that teacher have to hide in reacting to you in such a way?

326. Yesterday I spoke up at work about a level of abuse that was directed towards me. It occurred quite abruptly and I felt hurt by the way I was spoken to. So half an hour later I made the point of saying this and that it felt disrespectful. Even though it was not really accepted well, my body felt calm and clear in just expressing this, no matter what the outcome, it was a truth that needed to be expressed.

     1. I have had a similar experience at work recently, when I spoke and exposed a level of corruption that has been directed at me, I felt very solid and could feel there was such a flow in my words about what I needed to express regardless of how it was going to be received, my body felt great expressing truth!

     2. Dear Mathew I can feel the power in this. The difference in our body when we express and do not express is very clear, I feel agitated, the thoughts go round in my head, they come up days if not weeks later – it physically feels like there is something there in my body. Whereas when I express how I feel there is a lightness, a clarity and I don’t think about it again.

        1. Beautifully expressed Gyl. It is as if when we are truly aware and living to our truth we are ‘self-clearing’ organisms. We do not allow the garbage to accumulate and burden our bodies. We would never dream of not putting out the rubbish bins every week. So why do we not do the same for our bodies? Even fridges now de-frost themselves and this must have eventuated from a known knowledge that we self-clear.

     3. This is so good to hear Matthew. The human condition of not speaking up has made a mess of our world and we need to put things right no matter how long it takes, one conversation at a time just as you have shared here.

        1. I agree Dean; we can change things one conversation at a time, steadily bringing truth back into all our communications.

     4. Thank you Matilda, Mathew, Francisco and Stephen, it is absolutely time to express truth – whenever this happens to me there is a blessing for all involved!

327. The breaking of polite silence offers many challenges. The eyes that see the truth so clearly have become blurred by years of learning not to see it. The ears have become a little clogged to mask the sound of lies and denigration. The pipes of expression get rusted up by speaking the words that everyone wants to hear, not the words that are needed.
     But a little time, some commitment and practice renders the senses clear and the voice, speaking truth, that was once scratchy becomes clear and powerful. The modern quill of the keyboard becomes a vehicle for writing the truth again. And the human being is set free of a prison they did not know they existed in.

     1. Beautifully presented Rachel. This paints the picture of evolution. True art written for humanity.

     2. dentistryinharmony – Dr Rachel Mascord BDS , I found your comment so enlightening! I have certainly (unremittingly) been in that prison of not seeing clearly, hearing well or speaking the words that I know others need to hear. It has taken me quite some time and much practising to start un-blurring, un-clogging and de-rusting, but I am getting there day by day…small step by small step…

     3. Wow dentistryinharmony – Dr Rachel Mascord BDS., I love your expression written with authority, thank you; ‘But a little time, some commitment and practice renders the senses clear and the voice, speaking truth, that was once scratchy becomes clear and powerful.’

328. Politeness never serves society, it keeps us in a falsity pretending all is ok when underneath it all we are all desperate for truth because we all know the way we are living is not it. And for those that are not ready to admit this they will stir and cry to please be quiet yet how can we when the depth of the despair is so great.

329. Thank you Matilda, what you have expressed is gold, indeed the playground at school is a microcosmos of what is going on in the world. My experience growing up and at school never supported me in expressing my truth and it took me a couple of decades to find Serge Benhayon and the Ageless Wisdom Teachings for me to feel I have a true choice of being who I truly am.

330. Ahhhh, that feels awesome, Alison. Someone has to start the conversation, so why not me?

331. What a great reminder Matilda, it really is like that; If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative. This is not what we are here for but to be united and supportive with each other, and deepening the love that we have inside us with another in evolution.

332. A great blog Matilda. On reading through another time, I am held by the following “The playground scene is a brilliant micro of the world. If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative. How absolutely right you are here, we seem to learn from a very early age not to tell tales, or snitch on others. Maybe this comes from over-protective parents, but then also think of the ‘whistleblowers’ and how they are then treated by so many people. So much fear has been buillt up in people about telling tales.

     It has been said, ‘bad things happen when good people say nothing’, that is so true, so we are not going to see an improvement until more and more people become willing to stand up and say when something is not right.

333. Sometimes it can only take a moment of silence for us to stop and see how noisy the world has really gotten. Have we lost the ‘stop and smell the roses’ of our life’s? All we can smell now is the rot we have all allowed to carry on because we have not spoken up. Universal Medicine, Serge Benhayon, all the practitioners and everyone associated with this organization is making the new standard to stand up and be heard above the din that has become the normal in the world today.

334. Politeness has never served society well, it has only ever ‘served’ to cover up all the lies, all the hurt, all the anguish, all the misery, all the jealousy, all the emptiness, and pretend that all is well here on earth. Politeness is the biggest bandaid of comfort. When we do not speak in loving truth we are monumentally adding to the layers of falsity that bury the ills that should be exposed and healed by being felt and acknowledged – let all this buried garbage feel the warmth of the Sun’s rays and throw out the evil cover-up of politeness!

335. Matilda I read this again. I love what you expressed here: “…I am allowing myself to see that there is another way which can turn all this on its head, and that my speaking the truth of what I feel and see in the world will not be treacherous, threatening and scary. That, and in my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.”

     This is something I am re-learning and building my trust with too – to say what I feel out loud and in the moment. When I do this the war in my body ceases, the barriers of protection drop and harmony is restored.

336. I agree totally, my life changed dramatically when I started to express and just speak about what I was feeling each day and in the moment. It made life so simple and uncomplicated. It also stopped the pain when you are holding something back that you want to say and feel you cannot for fear of reaction.

337. I can completely relate to what you have written Matilda, and it seems for my own children that this exact issue you express here:

     “Children are nervous about telling people when things do not feel right because there is a culture of being labelled as a ‘snitch’ or ‘grass’ or ‘tell-tale’.

     This is essentially the children calling out the abuse and the bullying, yet when they do they are labelled. It is very empowering and amazing lessons for the children to be supported to express and to learnt to express the truth and not worry about what is said either behind their back or to their face if they know what they have called out is their truth.

338. Great blog Matilda. It’s a lose/lose situation when people don’t speak up. I love your words here “my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud,” – I can relate to this, I always reproach myself later for keeping the words in my head when I haven’t spoken them aloud. Appreciating how great my body feels when I do express what is there is helping me to change the momentum of not speaking up.

     1. I can totally relate Shelley to the self-reproach! Feeling the freedom in my body when I do express (and the imprisonment when I hold back) is slowly helping me to change my long-held pattern of not speaking up too.

     2. Yes Shelley, it is interesting how we can reproach ourselves for not speaking up, not realising we are cementing ourselves into a nice little conundrum: ‘Don’t speak up. Reproach myself. Don’t speak up. Reproach myself’. It is a vicious circle that eats us up – reminds me of sharks doing the attack for no purpose except that they can. Same energy. As we explore and heal our hurts the fatal suppressant begins to dissolve and all that joy and vitality that comes from speaking up is released, transforming our throats our cells and supporting everyone else to also speak.

339. This is such a great point Ariana, we are so often taught only to seek knowledge truth and facts from exterior sources, what if we were taught that the greatest form of wisdom and truth can only be found from within. Wait a minute, where does all the facts, information and wisdom come from in the first place?

340. More and more I have been feeling the effects on my body when I don’t speak up. My body hardens and tightens and sometimes my throat feels constricted. I feel small. In contrast when I choose to speak up my body expands and feels lighter. I even feel there is more space around me. There is no merit in holding back what needs to be expressed, not for ourselves or for anyone else who gets the blessing of feeling the truth spoken.

341. Yes I’ve held back too long in not expressing some obvious ‘little’ situations that could of been sorted out before escalating into ‘bigger’ ones. I held back for fear of the consequence of standing out in the crowd – fear of shining my light. As I’m committing more to life there is a gradual confidence building to not hold back and that my voice can and will be felt/heard. Fantastic sharing with us all Matilda.

342. Ahh thanks for sharing Rosie, I have often wondered why I find it so much easier to express the way I am feeling in writing rather than verbally and as you say it is because with writing I am not writing for the purpose of others approval where as with verbal communication there are people right in front of me and I find myself wanting to impress or rather more importantly, not “rock the boat”

343. This is Brilliant Matilda, this should be a must read in every classroom and or teachers manual across the globe. True prevention – supporting our children that their voice is important and they can speak up, instead of what we have today a system that encourages our silence and erodes at our confidence to such a point we give up and go what’s the point. Thank you to all those that have not given up and continue to speak up, inspiring the way for all of us.

344. Yeehaa Matilda well said, I feel I have been the product of this world we live in passed on down through the ages. Just shy of fifty years ago when I was a little boy growing up it was ‘little boys should be seen and not heard’ and I carried that on through school and into adult life and was led to believe that it was the correct and polite way to behave, well that’s a load of rubbish. You are so on the money – the time is now, speak up, speak your truth, no more holding back as I did last night outside in the carpark at the supermarket, as a boy spoke so disgustingly to his sister or friend, really just so derogative and it was expressed by him as the norm, how sad that I did not pull him up. I am not beating myself up here, just aware that we all missed out because I did not speak up.

345. When we speak up and speak our truth, the way we feel and even our body changes. Everything transforms in the most beautiful way – the way we stand, walk , present ourselves, our manner and our vitality, all are refreshed from our true expression.

346. Wow Oliver. I can absolutely feel how this would make you shut down and not trust others when you spoke up. Absurd that a teacher would set this example.it just goes to show how deeply ingrained the thinking of ‘not rocking the boat’ goes. Great example of how from a young age we are taught to tow the line.

347. i can really relate to this blog especially the part about being called a snitch in the play ground if you speak the truth.
     I have found swearing has become the norm in school playgrounds and if you say to the child, that’s not ok I am going to tell the teacher, you get called a snitch and if you tell the teacher, the teacher is most likely to say, don’t tell tales. how is the child going to grow up into an adult thinking when the truth is not listened to it is better to stay quiet?

     1. Exactly, very well said Jack. I have also found that when you do tell an adult or a person in a higher level of responsibility, they are often unlikely to hear your case or believe you – which is very disheartening and does not encourage people to tell the truth and speak up.

348. Everyone loses when we don’t speak up, followed by a build up of a loss of trust for everyone, if something does not feel right, expressing that ! offers an opportunity for the other to stop and feel what is going on or not and allows the choice to express and clear the air.

349. Hi Jinya I was bullied at school in the first year of primary school. A bigger kid was stealing my mates money every day, I didn’t speak up but punched him on the nose to discourage him. I came out of school at the end of the day and he was waiting for me with all his friends and big brother, I fought him too and beat him but only to be confronted by an even bigger brother the next day after school and I got beaten up. I was bullied by the same group of kids for the next five years. I wish I had just spoken up, it would have been much easier.

350. Thank you for this blog Matilda. I have often found it much easier to write things down than to speak how I feel and share my thoughts and opinions through my voice. However this is feeling extremely uncomfortable to continue and often it has felt like I am gagging myself to not speak. What I am discovering is that as I feel the Love inside of me grow more and more, it’s like there is permission in me to allow myself to express, without the worry that it will come out wrong. This is giving me much more confidence to share my true thoughts and feelings in a variety of scenarios and not worry so much about getting it wrong or what others may say.

351. What you have shown Matilda is that we can all see exactly what is going on in our playground around us. We have a choice to remain silent or claim who we are by expressing our truth in that moment.

352. Keeping quiet feels like more contraction in the body building up every time I repeat the experience, whereas speaking up feels expansive and warm and powerful, and I am engaging with life in the present moment, fully, and everything comes alive, even if the expression does not come out quite right. Unless we risk and try it out we will never learn but hide endlessly in the cave watching the shadows of life on the wall, as I remember being taught at school about Plato’s The Cave. However, we were only taught the theory, not the practice, nobody said to us “How do we live this?” How wonderful it would have been to have explored it as a class, what Plato meant, and how it could be lived, and practice it with each other, speaking the truth. But I feel the teacher probably did not know either, as she had probably kept quiet all her life too. And so the theories become the shadow life we live by.

     1. Wow joanchristinecalder! This is an awesome connection you have presented us with. Not speaking up is exactly described by Plato’s analogy of the shadows on the Cave wall. Having the courage, the heart, to speak up transports us out of the imitation, pale and shadowy reflection of life into the full glorious warmth of the Sun. The Splendour of the Sun.

353. I’ve been feeling that this ‘not speaking up’ which Matilda writes about happening in the playground, also happens in the home, where parents who have not spoken up shush their children so that they (the parents) won’t be noticed and embarrassed by what their children have said. I call to mind how one day I was being served in the bank when my 2 year old daughter said, quite loudly, on seeing a man with long hair ‘look Mummy, theres a lady man’, and i tried to shush her, only for her to repeat it even louder! So much better if i had taken the time to explain to her gently how the length of ones hair is a choice for both men and women.

354. I’ve just spoken up about self abusive behaviour observed in two people close to me. I did so to reflect truthfully what I saw and felt. To remain silent felt dishonest. I spoke to one in conversation, then wrote a letter to both, not personalised, but general, describing how and why abuse presents itself in human beings and the choices open to them. Both wrote back and thanked me. My letter reflected what they felt: they want to make changes but didn’t know how or where to start. I’ve learned when speaking up, it’s not what you say, but how you say it.

355. Thank you for this blog, Matilda, what I experience daily in the school I work in is seeing how, as soon as a child expresses or does anything that does not fit the schools model of behaviour whether this is constantly asking or answering questions, what colours they paint in, whether a fast or slow learner etc. comments and or labeled are made directly to the child or another adult. So for me this blog is a great reminder of the importance of and support that I am to be the one who speaks up!

356. Another brilliant and revealing aspect of the social patterning that normalises lying. Thank you, Aimee.

357. Tolerance is dangerous, defined as the capacity to endure continued abuse without adverse reaction. No one can withstand continued abuse without reaction, its simply a learnt way of burying our reactions back into the body – when we dump on the body in this way and temper our expression – the body speaks back with illness and disease.

358. It’s sad Oliver that you did not have the support of the teacher when you told the truth, and that instead you were judged for being a ‘snitch’. It’s sad that she could not see the value in telling the truth. If we were all celebrated and supported when we tell the truth the world would be a very different place.

359. Matilda, you have exposed something that is at the core of our society – the dis-harmony and disrespect of humanity – that is actually fostered right from the word go in the school playgrounds. And your are spot in saying that this playground area is a microcosm representation of the macrocosm of the world. When as children we are not encouraged to speak up and that there are active attempts to silence us by calling us tell-tales etc. it is absolutely a way to shut down a child’s expression and remove true support from them. I certainly recall having this being pushed upon me as a child – I recall going to report abuse to the teacher and then being called a sissy or tell tale by the other students. Being silent and not reporting abuse is another way in the adult world to make it appear that statistically violence is not escalating or worse yet that it is diminishing. No different to the rules and regulations changing in the police force where they no longer take reports or document particular incidents because of shortage of staff/to reduce paperwork etc. – and so lo and behold it appears that the crime rate in the area has diminished. But the numbers are skewed and do not hold the truth as people are being turned away – being turned away from the opportunity to express and seek support for something that all human beings have a right to. It is a shock when we reflect upon the society and the world that we have all been a part of creating. And so this is the time then to feel the lack of love in this deeply and no longer choose that as our way forwards.

360. I can remember being in high school, always feeling what was going on in the school yard but never spoke up. I was part of what you could call the “cool gang” and some of these girls could be super nasty to others, it was part of being cool. Although I could feel that this was not OK and what was said about others was not OK, I never said anything, just sat back and let it happen in order to stay in the group and to be accepted. Fast forward 25 years and I find that I am often I am still in the same situation, not speaking up when I feel something is not OK. Not speaking up feels awful in the body and leaves us in contraction. Every child and every adult should be encouraged to speak up and speak their truth, even if we don’t always get it right, the act of speaking up creates space and openness in the body.

     1. This is exactly my experience too Donna. The ‘popular’ crowds in schools can be quite rude and ‘bitchy’ to each other, but I don’t actually think they enjoy being that way… At all… I was talking to a girl once who is in that group, and she was saying to me how she didn’t actually enjoy being labelled a ‘mean girl’, but it would be impossible for her to make new friends and move crowds as she had already committed and made the choice to be in the ‘populars’. The social hierarchy in schools is pretty horrendous.

361. Wow Oliver, I can absolutely relate to your story at school as it is something that happened to me too a long time ago. I remember the teacher saying ‘No one likes snitches’ and I too chose to shut down feeling that there was nowhere I could safely express without being labelled or ostracised. We all have a responsibility in supporting children to feel safe to express what they are seeing and feeling.

362. I feel that if children are taught to speak out, without being scared, if what they are saying is open, honest and truthful, they would not be afraid to stand up and be counted for their honesty. Perhaps teachers could be more open and listen to what the children have to say?

     1. Yes, Mike. This is an amazing opportunity for teachers to nurture children’s expression of how and what they are feeling. Think of the power of every teacher, one by one, bringing this kind of awareness to teaching, hearing children out, honouring them, bringing loving (and sometimes firm) guidance, and being able to listen without judgment. What an inspiring role model that would be. The whole status quo of lying, politeness, covering up, hypocrisy, compliance would be blown out of the water. Bring it on!

363. I can super relate to this Oliver. As a young kid I remember clearly being told off for doing things even as simple as mixing paint… Quite a lot of the time I was the ‘teachers pet’ (as they liked to call me), but that is because when I stepped ‘outside the line’ I was told pretty straight away to stop expressing and being so ‘loud’.

364. Joel, I like that you have used the phrase ‘selfish way to live’, as it rings very true to me. I know that I have been selfish in the way that I have lived in the past and present but as I start to feel that we are all brothers I have come to realise that although it may feel like we separate it is in fact impossible to separate from brotherhood. We just think we go off and build our private little nest but in truth whatever we do in that nest still affects everybody that is outside the nest- as we are all connected, it is an unescapable fact. One day we will come to see that our ‘selfish’ ways are laughable as they just don’t make sense in the whole picture.

365. Love your comment, Anne. Definitely agree with your quote from Matilda “If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative”.
     Yes, we have to speak up, it is the only way that we are going to change things.

     I remember some time back being told by a man how he had been bullied when he was in high school, even to the extent that during the chemistry class, he would deliberately have acid splashed at him by a couple of bullies. Even though the teacher had seen what happened, she chose not to do or say anything about it. So he had no support and kept quiet for many years. Unfortunately he said he had not told his parents, as they were very busy at the time and he did not want ‘trouble’ at the school. This has resulted in a life long lack of confidence in that person, changing a little gradually as he now speaks out about this sort of bullying and now claims that these acts should actually bring the police into the picture at the school.

366. Wow that is quite shocking to hear Oliver. True brotherhood is about supporting another to live their truth. The idea of loyalty is so convoluted and mutated that the version of brotherhood we have is nothing more than keeping quiet so another can continue to live a lie. This false ideal is so deeply ingrained and the fear of being singled out for speaking up stops many of us from doing so.

     1. Absolutely Jinya, brotherhood that we have in society is about everyone staying where they are in the safe place whereas true brotherhood is asking everyone equally to step up and evolve, pulling up and supporting those who resist

     2. Yes Jinya, this is rediculous, that this game of politeness and niceness feeds the false ideals. It is time not to allow this any longer and standing out for telling the truth. I am aware that the world does not want to hear it and that I will be attacked for it, but this makes me even stronger and I will keep calling out the lies.

367. Hi Oliver, I can also remember from a very long time back, that it was not done to ‘tell’ on someone who had cheated. Yes, even back then, they were labelled ‘snitches’. So mostly, if one saw this behaviour, one always hoped that the teacher him/herself would catch the person out. We were not game to ‘dob’ someone in. It can be very ugly what goes on in the school grounds.

     1. Wow, it’s amazing to consider people’s behaviour and how adults can hurt children deeply when they defiantly stick to right and wrong instead of connecting with the child first up.

368. Matilda, I was just thinking, what we have been seeing in people who have been coming forward in the big enquiries into paedophelia in various churches and other organisations in Australia over the past couple of years is a big example of how the lives of those who kept the truth hidden have been pretty well destroyed by it. The scars have stayed with them all their lives. In many cases these (then) children were not believed if they did speak up. Unfortunately, in the case of Priests molesting children, often even the parents of these children did not believe them. In the past, there was such a high regard for priests, people did not believe they would do such a thing. How hard it was for those children to have to grow up knowing they were not believed. But of course, many did not speak up through fear and shame of what had happened to them. What a healing it has been for many of those who have now at last spoken up.

369. ‘What happens when we do not speak up?’ We become ill and the abuse, neglect, silence and lies carry on. All my life I have seen things going on that felt wrong but felt what difference can one person make? It is a useless battle. This is not true; one person standing up for truth and speaking out can make a huge difference, this doesn’t need to be with a megafon in the high street but everywhere in our lives we see this happening. Matilda you can make a huge difference to the children in the school you work in. What I am also seeing is across the world how more and more people are coming together to call out and say NO to the lovelessness that goes on.

370. It feels like we’ve played a game of abusing ourselves, getting caught inside when we don’t speak out and perpetuating the behaviour by staying silent. When adults stand up and say that it’s not ok for bullying to continue, children will feel supported to hold onto what they know is true.

371. Its great to re-read your blog Matilda and to read all of the comments, I have thought at times that it is just me playing small and not speaking up, but i can feel now how this a worldwide epidemic, that we as a society do not speak up for truth and instead keep quiet for comfort, to be nice and polite and to not rock the boat, I can feel how it it is my responsibility to speak up against abuse and say when something does not feel right.

372. Your phrase Abby, brought up forgotten memories of my youth on what not to speak about if you wanted to not rock the boat. Being a bit of a rebel in my youth, would like to push the boundaries, It was always the rule that when ever you took out a canoe it was mandatory to rock the boat and roll it over and then get back in it, does the rebel ever really go away. The only T-shirt I ever had that had a statement on it, simply asked a question, all it said was ‘question authority’. This was a time I was in the military and once a Colonel looked at my shirt and said ‘you could get in trouble for that’ and I simply replied with ‘Yes Sir, I know” I seem to have spent a life time calling out things that were not right/truth except when it came to do it for myself. This has been a work in progress.

373. ‘If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers,’ this is a great observation of how we have become in life in our state of apathy. And it is time for us to stop suffering and begin to truly heal.

     1. Michelle what this shows me is that all the times I’ve held onto not speaking up in case others get offended is actually not true! It’s for us to speak up our truth and in that everyone grows and can heal. There is currently an epidemic of silence from millions of people who know things are wrong yet continue to allow them to happen. Ingrained since young so it takes time to break through and build confidence yet it is the only way the world will change.

374. By not speaking up when we feel something is not right, leaves a darkness or a sickness in our bodies, and also in the ‘playground’, as we have implicitly given permission for that ill-energy/ abuse to continue unchecked; and we know deep down that we have let it. Others also know, just not those affected or hurt by the abuse, but including the ones who have perpetrated the harm. In a sense there is a let down on all sides, and a deepening loss of trust for everyone, as all players either shut down or harden up with an extra layer of protection. Those who hurt others are only trying to control to not be hurt, so the cycle continues as the hurts deepen, and everyone loses.

     1. Very well said Annie C. Everyone loses out when we do not speak up.

     2. What a great way to discrete it, that makes it clear what happens when we hold back. We give permission to an ill energy to be in our body and what it does there is not nice at all when we give away our control and let it create its own mess.

375. At the same time as humanity hold back from saying what is not true or not right, there is also a tendency to not support or encourage what is true. When someone looks or feels great, or brings a quality that is true, again little is said to support this, but there is also an activity to pull the other down because they stand out. Commenting on what feels true for someone can and usually is super supportive and is a reminder that what is true is always within. I’ve found that a person can do a task 100 times perfectly well and nothing is said, but as soon as it is done differently or maybe something is missed, they are judged by that one action and that is the only time someone speaks to them. There is little true support for people, if we encourage this perspective, the quality of the activity and the connection to what is true is felt, developed and encouraged.

     1. Good points Matthew. It is very revealing to observe the things we do to keep others ‘in their place’. Such behaviour is rife and we do it to ourselves too if we are not careful and very self-aware. Something well worth pondering on in my view.

     2. Your comment Matthew has made me look at the way I support what is true. I often complain when the service is not good, when someone in my house makes a mess and doesn’t clear it up etc. But do I balance it by making a point of praising good service, and thanking those who keep the place tidy? I do, sometimes, but not as often as I could, and this is something that can be easily incorporated into my daily life – its great to be appreciated, and thanked for even the simplest of tasks.

     3. Wow thank you for sharing this Jane, and yes, people know but we choose to stay in comfort, for whatever reason, to keep our job, to be safe and secure, to be liked etc. It is deeply inspiring to read how you have spoken the truth, regardless of other people. Eventually the truth comes out, whether we like it or not.

     4. Great sharing Jane, so many of us would have stories like this. I have many similar stories, in one, I was reprimanded for speaking up and told that I needed to be quiet because people were following me when they should be following “the boss”. Even though they were nice and polite about it the message was loud and clear: don’t disturb the status quo. Interestedly I felt no one truly enjoyed their job, they saw it as a means to an end, the only time there was any true joy was when they found the courage to speak up, then they felt their true power and loved sharing how it felt.

     5. Thanks Jane. This shows that the people feel truth, but at the time they where not ready to speak up. What a blessing for them to hear it through you and that you stood for it. This is how we need to stand for that what is right, even if that means that we loose the job or we have to go somewhere else. When we stand for the truth we will always be supported. What helped me is to trust into my inner strength and to let go of that what is not supporting me.

376. When we do not speak up, we can not only hinder our own personal development, but can hinder the opportunity for those around you to not grow either. The enormity of this I am just feeling more deeply into just now. The letting go of focussing too much on myself and the realization that I am really impacting on so many others when I do not express and just how important that is.

377. “Are we hoping someone else will do something; are we making excuses for not putting our heads above the parapet to say ‘This is madness.’…”
     It is long been a comfort to think that ‘someone else’ will fix up the mess: Mum, Dad, the teacher, our boss, the government, our friend…..an endless list of ‘someone else’s.’

     For me, part of this holding back has been what we accepted as speaking up – arguing, defiling, name calling – just watch any democratic Parliament in sitting to witness all of the above.

     But is this the only way to speak up? Since attending Universal Medicine presentations, I have come to understand that the truest way to speak up is to speak from a body that is loved, nurtured and cared for; this body allows no abuse and is naturally honest and open; this body holds oneself and others as equal and so the need for argument, name calling and vitriol are non existent. What remains is a true form of communicating – an honest expression of what is experienced by my body.

     This is how I choose to express now and how I naturally speak up. Is this what we could be offering to our children?

     1. Beautiful Coleen, what an amazing role model, not only to your children but the world.

     2. Very true coleen24, learning how to truly love and care for ourselves once again does enable us to confront abusive behaviour from a completely different perspective. The more I care for myself the more I am learning that there is no need to fight, but every need to express truthfully, which can be done with tenderness and genuine respect. I have witnessed miracles when it has happened (which has amazed me, experiencing all the fight fizzle away), because if I am not coming with all guns blazing so to speak, there is no need for the other person to defend themselves, hence no argument can get a foothold.

     3. You have expressed this well coleen24. When we communicate from a body that is loved and nurtured, truth is naturally and lovingly shared with another.

     4. Thank you Coleen, “Are we hoping someone else will do something”. A great line, as it is so easy to sit back and watch while knowing exactly what needs to be said, expressed and felt from our body.

     5. I totally love what you talk about Coleen, if I would wait until someone else will fix up the mess, I would not be the same person that I am today. As I had started to fix up my own mess first I could see clear what else is in need to be looked at next, and that is now the bigger step out of my own comfort and speaking out what is next that wants to be addressed. Everything I feel that there is something not right and missing truth I have to name it, this comes with so much ease now because now since I have started to change my mess. And it gets easier and easier.

378. I like it Ariana – say it like it is.

379. There are many occasions where I have seen things that I know are wrong and yet I have stood by and hoped that someone else will speak up and resolve it. I now understand that I can’t live that way anymore, every time I see something that isn’t honest, truthful or acceptable, it is 100% my responsibility to act and call it out. Standing on the sidelines just doesn’t work.

380. After a lifetime of trying to be nice, never saying what I truly feel, and therefore always being a victim of the circumstances or people around me, I am finding through the inspiration of Serge Benhayon that I am now able to feel much more, recognise it and express it. I have also discovered that there is a difference between expressing your emotions and your feelings. I can have an emotional outburst which I regret later, but that has usually happened because I did not express my true feelings long ago.The change has to happen from inside for us to be able to claim ourselves and risk expressing the truth when we feel it; only that way will it carry the power to start change.

381. This is so important what you have shared and this is just within one school! I know in the past I haven’t wanted to speak up for fear of being stupid, that I don’t understand, that I see differently from others and of having a complete lack of confidence in myself. This is starting to change now but taken a very long time to heal in my life. Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine have been a great support in teaching me the reasons why I hold back in life and how not to hold back but express what is going on. It is really damaging when we do this, not only to ourselves but everyone else. We now have a responsibility to help others to not hold back but express all that they feel. I don’t feel I am completely there in able to do this yet but am working towards this, like many others as it really needs to change.

382. There are so many moments every day if we are aware of it when we have a simple choice to express in full the love and truth that we know is our natural way of living or to settle for less. By only expressing some truth or expressing truth some of the time we are in effect colluding with the social game designed to bury and hide truth.

383. If we do not speak up we are simply living a lie.

     1. Wow yes, a profound and powerful statement Diana and Rebecca. I am going to say it again: ‘If we do not speak up we are simply living a lie’. If it were to be visibly seen we would all be walking around with long noses like Pinocchio. It is only relatively recently that I have felt the extent of the lie we live. It is so good to see it that clearly and in observation with no judgment attached – just the fact of it.

        1. Like how you use the story of Pinocchio to make it visible. There is a great lesson in that story. And even though we do not have a nose that grows, we do have a body that feels contracted when we hold back.

384. So true, children and parents alike are often worried about speaking up in case some one does’t like them or they think they may get more attacked. Silence how ever condones, bullying, be it verbal or physical. If we take the playground environment, many of us know as parents that we want to have a world that supports our children, this the way, money and stuff comes very much behind supporting a child if they wish to speak the truth and speaking the truth with that chid, that is what really supports them to know that there can be a different way in life, it can life changing and empowering.

385. So what happens when we DO speak up?, We tell the truth, refuse abuse, stay who we are, others see this and do the same, and the world becomes more loving. Simple choices, great world.Thank you Ariana, this is so clear.

386. All very true Ariana. As you’ve shared, when we don’t speak up (and naturally then lie instead) things start to escalate – others look and observe us; someone accepting abuse in their life – and begin to think that is okay. They then set the example for other people to do the same, and we end up with a world that lies, accepts and delivers abuse and plays it small. All of this is our responsibility to change.

387. For children to hold what they know to be true and know their voices will be heard we, the adults, have to build the foundation for them with our example. ‘This has to be reflected to them first, and at the moment we are not doing this.’ This is a simple, practical, urgent inspiration for us all. Thank you, Susie.

388. I hadn’t appreciated just how damaging it is to be called things like “‘snitch’ or ‘grass’ or ‘tell-tale’” when we speak our truth. Yet the tread then carries through our life until we heal that. Whilst we can’t change the past, whats beautiful about your sharing is how we can change how we express from hereon out.

     1. Hi lindellparlour, a ‘grass’ is an ‘informer’. I felt to let you know just in case it took a while before David reads these comments.

        1. Thank you Nicholas. I know what a snitch and a tell tale is but I had never heard of a grass before.

389. ‘“The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Albert Einstein’. It appears that most of us have been complicit in this at some stage and it is well time for all of us in the world to look at this responsibility so we can build a truer future.

390. What has come up for me is an analogy of living in a garden. I will forever see opportunities of pulling out a weed, pruning something, watering and feeding – I have a choice to taking care of the garden by acting whenever I spot an action is required. This is similar to taking care as I live life – I have a choice to take care and speaking when I feel that something requires expressing. If we choose to ignore what we feel or keep burying our head in the sand, we end up living in a garden overgrown with weeds and hardly any flowers.

391. Well said Ariana, when we don’t speak up we are accepting all sorts of abusive behaviour. Children and adults alike need to speak up about what does not feel right. We are responsibility for the world that we allow.

392. I have also noticed playground behaviour, “Children are nervous about telling people when things do not feel right because there is a culture of being labelled as a ‘snitch’ or ‘grass’ or ‘tell-tale’.” The flack some children get from others when they have told an adult about what is going on can be intense. They become demoralised, keep the situation to themselves even though they are really wanting to seek support and feel destabilised from the inside. From this place a shutting down can occur and a giving up. Isn’t this what we have done as adults in the bigger world of life?

393. Matilda this is such a strong blog, you have shared so much that as a society we need to think about carefully. ‘As long as our nests are secure and apparently unaffected (“sure we argue sometimes, but the war is overseas”) we carry on regardless of the hurt and chaos.’ Turning a blind eye to keep our own comforts doesn’t in any way, shape or form change what needs to be changed. I have lived with the prime focus of keeping my nest unruffled ignoring the disturbance outside my front door and I am only just beginning to be aware of the damage this causes.

     1. Me too Rachel. I never realised how self-ish this way of living was. Of course there is a responsibility of oneself to consider, but there is also an understanding that we are all equal brothers, living in this world, together, which is of equal, utmost important for us all in order to live harmoniously together….otherwise the cycle continues.

     2. Absolutely Rachel and Roberta. We have been not speaking up to protect ourselves, to keep ourselves safe, just thinking about me ,me, me. We do have a deeper responsibility towards ourselves and to all, to halt the the onward march of sold-out compliance and harmful silence in the face of falsity and abuse.

394. “If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative”. Unfortunately there are very few in today’s society who have the courage to speak up and, as this blog describes, this starts in early school years where “children are learning to keep quiet, not saying out loud what they feel and know’. This needs to change – it is time that children were encouraged to express what they feel from an early age and were listened to. Children, when encouraged, have much to say and great wisdom to share. Thank you Matilda for bringing attention to this important subject.

395. As you say Ariana, not speaking up quickly becomes not just not speaking up but actively reducing ourselves. The ‘grass’ argument is simply a suitable way to express our jealousy towards others as it is very difficult not just to express but to express in the teeth of these constant attacks.

396. Thank you Matilda for such an inspiring blog. I spent a lifetime of not speaking up and I certainly know the consequences of that. It is great to know, now, that I do have a choice.

397. Ariana, I found the way you expressed and presented your comment above as to ‘what happens when we do not speak up’ very powerful. Thank you. It just lays it bare, with no murky or shady bits – it’s very clear.

398. Well said Adam. Yesterday I ended up talking with two butchers while buying some meat. I expressed how I always enjoyed coming into their shop. No one came into the shop for the next half hour as they talked to me about how they run their workplace. They both had cruel masters in their apprenticeship and could see that fewer and fewer young men were wanting to come into the butcher’s trade because of this agonising baptism into the fold. John, who is passionate about his trade, ended up buying his own business with the purpose of having a group of men that would work together – not against each other, help each other out when they can, have a lot of fun while working, appreciate each others strengths and know their weaknesses, be willing to speak up when they were feeling something was wrong so that it could be out in the open. The two butchers ended by saying practically in unison, ‘We work long hours for 6am to 5pm, but with a stress-free workplace this is easy and enjoyable and there is no burn-out. As a result we rarely get sick or have to be taken to hospital, and if this were the case we would look after each other. This family is just as important to us as our family at home’. I was standing there listening in absolute awe as they expanded to me what they live. No coal here, only diamond.

399. Great blog, Matilda, saying it as it is and as it needs to be said – that we’re all responsible for expressing truth when we see, hear or feel something that is anything but. Although it might feel like we’re a lone voice, that ripple effect you describe is unwittingly contagious, giving others the inspiration to express too. Only when we have the courage to step out of our self-made comfort will things really change – and that’s likely for many to be only when things start to affect us and our comfort levels personally.

400. Ariana you have called it exactly as it is. The last one is the alarm bells ‘We accept a world that is abusive to all’. When we stop and really consider what this is saying I truly believe we all know that this is not how we are suppose to be living. Deliberate Abuse, Assault and attacks on our fellow brothers down to the smallest detail when we are just out for ourselves. This hurts big time when you sit and realise that this is at play and running our world.

401. Great, concise summary of how the consciousness of believing its safer to stay small affects us all on every level.

402. This is a great expose of how our natural innate expression can tarnish as we grow up. I have been a follower of the niceties, being polite, and doing and saying what I ‘thought’ was the right thing by others and what they wanted to hear. However through Universal Medicine I have come to understand the importance of speaking the truth, and when we speak to another openly and honestly it is amazing how open people are to hearing the truth – in fact they want more of it, and so much magic can happen from sharing in this way.

403. Yes Ariana, we accept a created world that is without love, and live life as this, in abuse. For what is not love, is abuse. Calling abuse for what it is by speaking up draws back the curtain to unveil how far and how normal ‘living without love’ (abuse) actually is, and seeps into our entire psyche. What happens when we start to love – we start to live again. And others watch, and may feel inspired by the unshakeable truth that is before. When we live and express truly again, we have a world that’s pointed back to its original epicentre and home – that of love.

     1. Yes ladies, I get the ‘compressed, constricted’ feeling too when I don’t speak up. Actually it feels as if my head is going to explode and I feel sick in the stomach. Imagine what illnesses are in the making due to not expressing, whatever it is that needs to come out?! With more love expressed, there should be an ever-decreasing weight of having to point out things that are not love, until eventually all we do is express love all the time and live in the joy that is our natural way.

404. What you share here Matilda is clear, that when we start to silence ourselves from fear we withdraw from life and who we are. Though the games continue, there is no ground in which we can play, just as we naturally are.

405. Oh yes Ariana, I can vouch for the fact that not speaking up leaves us feeling tight and compressed. I find this whether what I have not said is what we may call the ‘difficult’ stuff, or the ‘good’ stuff. Holding back expressing just how much I love someone or something, or how beautiful I find something hurts me and others just as much as when I don’t say that something feels not quite right.

406. Reading your blog again Matilda took me back to my school days when those same issues went on then and children were discouraged from speaking up. We all have a responsibility not just to speak up ourselves but to encourage and support children of all ages to express how they feel.

407. For some of us part of the journey back to expressing truth has been to allow ourselves to feel our bodies, to notice that something doesn’t feel right and then to feel that it’s OK to express what we feel. In some countries where drug gangs rule, it really isn’t safe to stand up and express, you risk your life, but it is our standing by and letting it happen that has created that mess. We can start in small ways, being truth-full to our partners, family, friends, our colleagues, and for those that can, further afield.

408. It is lovely to reconnect with your blog Matilda. I have noticed how much more aware I am becoming of what is really going on – what I am feeling and what others are feeling around me. It has been great to acknowledge and honour these feelings, in a way I have never done before – and yes, speaking up when necessary. I have also been feeling when I do not need to say anything and just a movement or a gesture is enough to change the situation. I love how you have written the choice to “start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside” – expression is powerful through our communication, but our expression IS everything and not only in how we communicate.

409. Are we all hiding behind our masks of ‘niceness’ when we don’t speak up and speak the truth? We have been conditioned from an early age to ‘don’t say anything if you can’t say something nice!’ So, in being ‘nice’, have we have shut down our expression, shut down our ability to call out the wrongs in this world and become totally oblivious to righting all the wrongs we see around us every day? Even our governments turn a ‘blind eye’ to the ills in society in the fear that they are not being seen as ‘nice’ – being ‘nice’ is evil and is one of the roots of the wrongs that are happening in this world.

     1. So many masks, being nice, polite, putting on a brave face and all the conditioning that stops us being the person that we truly are. As you say, ruthanderssen007, we have shut down our expression as individuals and as a society. Buried underneath all this rubbish is the truth which is beginning to surface again now that some of us are finding the courage to put our heads above the parapet, knowing that sometimes we will be shot at but most of the time we will just be giving people a helping hand to come out of hiding and be their true selves.

     2. Isn’t being behind the mask of ‘niceness’ just another way of not taking responsibility, like a get out clause. It does seem to me that this is how we have been trained since young to hold back what we want to say and I remember being told ‘if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all’.

     3. Great comment ruthanderssen007. I always turned a blind eye to things I disagreed with. I followed the proverbs about ‘The freedom of speech’, ‘Every man has a right to say what he wants’, and ‘Each man his own’, but now I see there should be a proviso added: ‘As long as it is hurting no one. Now I ‘speak up’.

410. When I don’t speak up I lose my connection with god – well actually it never leaves me because that is impossible, but it seems that way because I leave it for a while. If there is no connection my life is quite awful and empty. Therefore we could say perhaps that the purpose to life is to learn how to hold a steady connection (as much as humanly possible) no matter what happens around us.

411. Matilda I had a conversation with a fellow work mate this morning about the condition of the world and humanity. The lady willing admitted that she lives in her mind most of her days because she can’t handle what is going on in the world and there is nothing she can do to change it. Most people look at the situation as a whole – the whole world – how can we fix that it’s too big so people give up. We need to start small, first with ourselves, then our families/friends, the play ground etc. This way it’s manageable, achievable and not overwhelming. From little things big things grow 🙂

412. Thank you Matilda for this immensely important blog on speaking up and where it first starts with us all. It is eye opener and a model for us all in the world today and the necessary changes that can occur to bring about a more harmonious loving way of simply being in the world and a living way we all truly crave underneath. It shows the responsibility , integrity and loving joy we can all live and change life to.

413. To stick our heads over the parapet and speak up, we need to claim ourselves in the face of all that might come our way in reaction. Life is that playground and we never leave it in truth. So it’s up to us who lays down the rules. Do we let the bullies tell us who we are and what we can say? I have also kept quiet at times in fear of the reaction. But the times when I did speak, even if I was called a ‘sneak’, I always felt better for saying the truth.

     1. Jinya, I agree speaking the truth feels so much better than not despite the reaction you may or may not get.

     2. Really beautifully put Jinya. I love how you have expressed this. Hearing this is a great reminder and confirmation for me that it is okay to speak my truth. Holding back in fear of reaction does not feel good at all.. it feels horrible in my body and affects my entire day and week.

        1. I agree Annie, ‘Holding back in fear of reaction does not feel good at all.. it feels horrible in my body and affects my entire day and week.’ If I have a strong feeling to say something and at that moment go into my head and stop myself saying it for whatever reason then it feels awful, quite devastating,I feel tired and small, if I express what i feel then it feels amazing, very natural and powerful and I feel strong and true and my body feels amazing.

     3. So true Jinya and your comment at the end is quite poignant. How often are we persecuted for telling the truth, for outing a wrong and putting ourselves on the line. It is appalling really that we attack those who speak up, when in reality everyone is benefiting by the action. I know for myself that learning to speak up is definitely a work in progress that needs my constant attention, because as you say Jinya, we always feel the worth of expressing the truth.

     4. Well said michelle819. I agree.

414. Yes. We do a lot to not rock the boat.
     “Must be a valuable course” one could think – but is it?
     Corruption, sadness, arguments, inner emptiness, abusive relationships, increasing of incomprehensible illnesses, wars inside and outside of people & houses (to name just a few phenomenons of our society) are “normal” – what means: accepted.
     Thats not the boat and course I like to carry on – but if I like a change here, I have to change. I have to speak up and bring in the values I am longing for: truth, harmony, love, joy, brotherhood, simplicity, beauty, grace and a deep connection to God. And I have to speak up.

     1. ” but if I like a change here, I have to change. I have to speak up and bring in the values I am longing for: truth, harmony, love, joy, brotherhood, simplicity, beauty, grace and a deep connection to God. And I have to speak up.” Sandra – we have the same values. Count me in with yourself to living those values, and then to speaking out about them naturally. I look forward to it.

415. Wow Matilda, I don’t recall any blog recently that had as many replies is this short a time! It was like the dam has burst with the expressions that have spilled forth on speaking up. We are but the tip of the iceberg… the silence has been broken, we all have a voice and it is well past time to start using it to call out truth and what is not.

     1. Very true – it is like the dam got broken and huge waves of unexpressed expressions have flown forth… nothing like someone expressing in their truth to inspire others to do the same. This is how we change the world – one expression at a time.

416. Children reflect the way we live and we try to change the behaviours of our children without looking where these behaviours come from so we can continue to live our comfortable life. The ripple effect when we do speak up is as you say more far reaching than we could ever imagine. I know I can make a difference and every time I share what I feel it becomes easier to speak up and not stay in playing safe and be the nice girl I used to be.

417. Matilda, this is a blog the whole of humanity needs to read. The majority of us sit back in silence while the minority run amok, because we are under the illusion that it doesn’t effect us. I find this very powerful article such a kick up the backside as it makes me realise how silent I have been and the false comfort this brings, while so many in the world suffer and others profit from this suffering. The cycles need to be broken, I am so tired of seeing and reading about all the injustice in the world and the amount of money spent on weapons trying to fix the problems only to make them one hundred times worse.
     Your observation in the playground is so true I expect of most schools, it certainly was when I was at school many moons ago. What if we were taught at that early age in all schools all over the world the importance of speaking up and expressing what is really going on, how would this change the mess we are in?

418. I find from chatting with some young people that it’s not just the pressure of not speaking up -because they are effectively speaking up and calling out those around them -it’s also the jealousy and angst within the people they call out that gets thrown at them. When people feel disempowered, what seems to make them react the most is someone who is empowered and expressing it outwardly.

419. Wow Matilda, the power and truth in your words are so strong. Your blog really highlights the idiocy of not speaking up, why is it not normal to say when things do not feel right? & why would I not want to? Abuse is not OK and that includes shouting or being aggressive and all the arguing that we have come to accept as normal.

420. I appreciate what you have written here Marika and I have felt into my experience of this.. I too spoke truth when young but became frustrated and angry that others didn’t listen and didn’t get what I was saying. Expressing truth without emotions but from the power within opens up people to listen and feel what is being said.

421. Your words Simon I feel to be so true, that is “This absence of truth has to change, and the only way the next generation is going to learn is for us to live a different way that inspires them.” It could be possible that we come back to the field that we have earlier sowed the seeds upon – may our choice be a legacy of inspiration.

422. We have a huge responsibility towards the world’s children to create safe places for them to feel that they are able to freely express without any consequences. Holding back becomes a learnt behaviour which then is carried over into adulthood. I have come to realise as an adult by holding back the truth and not expressing doesn’t allow others to express and be in their truth.

423. Well said Matilda.. I am really sensing how the more we don’t speak up and do nothing we are adding to the rot that is going on. Unless someone says something… all this behaviour is classified as ‘normal’. Can we re-define what the meaning of normal is? If everyone was to speak up I’m sure the definition would change.

     1. I agree Ariel – it takes a commitment to see what is really going on – the rot at the heart of our society and the wrongs hidden behind the mask of good. Once you have seen it, you then have to step up and do something about it.

424. I have had many conversations around the situations we are seeing reflected and confirmed in the microcosm of the school yard. It’s a very strong force at ‘play’ changing the behaviour and permeating our kids. It’s like the school yard has become the indoctrination yard, so kids loose sight of who they are and conforming is the only option. We have a responsibility to expose this force and bring the ‘fun play’ back into the playground

     1. This is such an important point, and not only that but with increased technology and accessibility to it, our children are no longer free from the school play ground when they arrive home. There is no longer any reprise, time to collect yourself and see the bigger picture, connect with a different source, because the messaging and the social media continues 24/7.

425. Wow Matilda, this is a very powerful blog. You are absolutely right and this quote: “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Albert Einstein. This I know for myself, I have done. I have stood in silence in front of the face of evil and said nothing in fear of being attacked. It was an act of protection for only myself and I wasn’t willing to stand up for truth and for humanity. This was a huge pill to swallow. I am extremely inspired by your blog and Universal Medicine to always express truth and love. I am learning to stand up for truth and to speak up when I feel something is not true. I am learning to express truth in my everyday life and to not hold back and hide. I am learning that choosing to stay silence is no longer acceptable, choosing to play small and hide is no longer acceptable. I have come to realise that my life isn’t just about me, I am not alone and that my life is about humanity. To not let fear control me. I now know and feel that I was never alone, God was always with me, beside me patiently waiting for me to return to truth and love. Your blog Maditlda is immensely healing for me to read. As I am wiping my tears away, with deep appreciation and a massive thank you for this amazing blog.

426. I am so glad that you wrote this Matilda. It seems that we do not speak up on the playgrounds at school, and we let our children see that it is OK to not speak up. As they see us as an example. If the school ground is the growing up place for kids, and kids are learning not to say anything so that they fit in, we can not expect them to then keep their loving, tender and open qualities, so as they grow up, they stop expressing their loveliness, their sweetness and from their openness & honesty. I feel it is time to be honest of what we all have created in the school grounds and as we adults speak our own truth, this is what we reflect to our children and that is how we make a difference. Speaking up is very beautiful and so we should compliment kids on expressing, never taking them down.

427. Power-full blog Matilda. I love it thank you. Great question What happens when we do not speak up? The consequences of this are all to plain to see yet we hide from so many of these atrocities, living in our own comfort expecting others to clean up the mess. I am committing to speaking up more and more in my life from a place of love rather than reaction, as this previously is where my expression came from, a place of frustration and reaction to the world. But learning to speak from connection to truth and connection to myself is a very different feeling with very different outcomes. I know myself how it feels when I hear truth spoken in connection. It is a powerful transformative and evolutionary tool that is so much needed in the world

428. When I was young my grandfather would use the term “children should be seen and not heard”. As I grew the phrase “children should speak when they are spoken to” came into play. Then at school the teacher would make the statement “and there will be no talking back” or “no discussion”. And of course we all generally accepted that “silence was golden”. I literally felt gaged and powerless from very early on in life. Shaking off the shackles of this kind of indoctrination is so important. As you say Matilda: “Simply put, and in conclusion, my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade. Not OK!”

     1. Great point Barbara, and very true. As children we really are hushed at every possible moment – at the dinner table, when they’re playing too loud, at school etc. etc., and we are definitely taught then that ‘silence is golden’. I remember the chill that went down my spine when teachers used to tell me to stop talking, and that I ‘couldn’t listen to them or do my work at the same time as talking’… Overtime you make a choice to either stay quiet or rebel with detentions as consequence. I chose the former.

429. I was chatting to my colleague at work today, and just happened to ask how their partner was, expecting the usual ‘fine’ answer. But today they suddenly opened up, telling me about how it was really going and how they really felt. They talked about how they realised they never spoke up about how they felt and just bottled it up. It is amazing the lack of communication that can occur in a relationships, where everything bursts out in an argument but nothing is really talked about.

430. It feels to me that it is not so much that society does not want to know what is really going on, it is just that it no longer trusts the media to tell the truth, especially about the lies and the corruption of many governments and (what appears to me to be) warmongers who seem to me to be running our world with an agenda of hatred and violence. It appears many focus on competitive consumerism, whereby the privileged ones who have a job and money buy a whole bunch of things they don’t need or even want that advertising has brainwashed them to believe they need, while the other half of the world struggles for food and shelter.

431. Speaking up is such an impressive game changer – it takes fear and pressure out of you first and this makes every step you take different and more powerful.

432. Wow Thomas your honesty here is inspiring and it’s grand to feel you say it’s time to speak up and no longer hold back. I held back for years but I’m slowly learning to speak up and express my truth when I witness cruelty and harm before me. I quite often stuff up when I do, perhaps I didn’t fully express what I felt and allowed niceness to get in the way or I reacted to the other person’s reaction and then try to make them feel better but I’m learning step by step what works and what doesn’t so the next time I can try something a little different and deliver more of me. Giving it a go for me has allowed for the growth and learning. Awesome blog Matilda. What you write here is much needed for children in the playground and adults in the world, thank you.

433. I think a lot of people can relate to learning to keep quiet as a child, and as you mention ‘not saying out loud what we feel and know…’ – that behaviour starts very young in most of us so it’s no wonder many have trouble expressing their feelings after so many years of practice biting our tongues.

434. Yes Rachel. And if we all spoke up to the evil in this world – there would be no evil remaining… What does this say about just how much we are all holding back- in silence???

435. I noticed the other day when I held back a simple sharing with some friends. It wasn’t anything important, or a grand truth, but something everyday. By holding my expression back I could feel a tightness across my chest and a closed down feeling in my body. When I share with light-heartedness by whole body opens up and I feel so different. It just showed me clearly what happens to my body as a direct consequence of holding back.

436. We are seemingly powerless to do anything about the tyrannical dictator, the horrible cases of abuse and ever growing list of societal ills that fill the news. As you say Matilda, it’s as if the only place for humanity to find solace in such a world is with our heads in the sand, avoiding eye contact, in case we might see the same pain reflected in another’s eyes. It seems if we are not the doer of bad things, we are free to live out our lives in relative comfort, chasing security for oneself. There isn’t anything wrong with a life of security, but it leaves out a huge part of the equation. We are accountable, even if we don’t do those horrible things, by the fact that we live in this world and that we are temporary tenants. The power to make changes lies in claiming the responsibility we have as individuals.

437. Matilda your observations are profound and make such sense, it is boggling that what you share is not talked about widely. It is quite something to sum up not only our commonplace personal ill-dynamics, their evidence at play in our children’s lives, the way this then translates onto a global scale, the underlying causative factors and then offers us a way forward to break the cycle we have come to accept and yet hate all at once. Thank you, this should be read and studied widely… the simplicity of “I can start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside,” is accessible to all, not longitudinal studies, rocket-science or multi-national organisation needed!

438. The voices of children can often be heard loud and clear expressing truth without inhibition but can often be ignored by adults when they do. I was in the company of three such beautiful children yesterday aged 6, 8, and 12. We visited a city in a southern American state. I walked beside each one in turn and marvelled at their sensitivity and ability to openly express them selves. One said ‘ugh this place is scary, ugly, can we go home?’ Another said: ‘it’s dirty and seedy, there’s voodoo and prostitution here, can’t you feel it! The third, ‘What are we doing here, I don’t like it’ Each one expressed what I felt. When an adult attempted to disregard their feelings by romanticising the area, I spoke up, supported what the children and said we should leave. And we did.

439. Profound and true. We all have a responsibility to confront and challenge evil in whatever guise it comes at and always this is done for the greater good.

440. Yes Katie, it works both ways does it not? The more we build up the habit of not speaking out when we observe what is unacceptable behaviour the easier it becomes the next time and the next, until as you say Matilda, it becomes normal. But once we make the stand and let go of those layers of protection we have built around us, and speak the truth without fear of the consequences, then the next time it is easier, and the next and the next …. Then this becomes the natural way. This is what builds relationships and community. No mare in a herd of horses would ever tolerate a colt’s adolescent behaviour, they immediately separate them from the herd until they have learned their lesson, and I am sure many indigenous tribes still call any behaviour that harms the community to account. It seems to be our so called civilised society where it exists, with the danger of “freedom of expression” and “being ourselves” becoming a convenient excuse for “We can do whatever we like”. Freedom to speak the truth on behalf of the community and humanity is a very different thing. The expression has to be inclusive of all, not just for ourselves.

441. An amazing blog and an amazing array (and number) of comments all reflecting similar. Which goes to show me that we are all feeling this. That we all know; how much it hurt not feeling we can stand up, how much we thus haven’t stood up and how powerful it now is when we do stand up. Truly this claiming of our what we know and feel in every cell of our body is bedrock of a loving and equal humanity. And is the catalyst for true evolution.

442. Recently my son has accompanied me when I have been meeting and listening to various people expressing their views on Cyber Abuse. I can tell what a profound effect it had on him, to see and hear people claim with absoluteness that this behaviour was not OK, was not acceptable – not in any single way. He is nine years old and just entering the arena of the on-line world, so to have heard these conversations has been a great marker for him. Now that isn’t to say, that that marker might dissolve or shift as he gets pressures from other parts of his life. But my point is, imagine if he (and all of our children) was hearing that kind of claimed voice all day, very day. Imagine the confidence he would have in claiming for himself that which he knows is wrong (and he absolutely knows). Watching the effect that it had on him, certainly made me ever more aware of my responsibility both as his parent and as a parent of all of humanity to stand up and claim my voice.

     1. Absolutely ottobathurst. Your son is getting a great foundation.
        We are being educated every moment of the day, either in ‘truth’ or ‘not truth’. Parents and teachers, and everything around us, is educating us constantly. True education comes from the reflection of our being in all we say. If we speak from our love, presence and true authority children immediately get that because they already are that . . . and it confirms that true authority within them instead of undermining it, as most communication does. True expression in education is pure Medicine.

443. “…this has to be reflected to them first..” This is so true. It is the responsibility of the adults to set a foundation whereby it is not only OK to speak out, it is actually our responsibility as members of an equal humanity to speak out for our brothers. This should be a lived and expected part of an humane society. We talk often about freedom of expression, freedom to live a life free of abuse and fear, democracy, peace, equality, eradication of poverty, disease etc…a whole list of goals and expectations of how our society should be living together. But what if “speaking up and saying no to that which we see and know as wrong” were a practised and natural and accepted way of being? If you stop and ponder it for a while it is amazing what an effect this would have on…well, everything.

444. Yes, I too as a child learned to keep so very quiet, not saying out loud what I felt and knew and I learned it so well that I stayed that way well into my adulthood. I was such a good learner that I didn’t speak up when I was bullied at work for years – I was deeply unhappy of course but I didn’t say anything. But one day when I saw another work colleague targeted, I knew enough was enough. I did speak up, the matter was resolved and I haven’t silenced myself since. Its not just for the things that are horrid, but I needed to learn to say the things that were beautiful too – like when I deeply appreciated another, when I felt delighted or when there were wisdoms I felt to share. Holding back is now not an option.

445. I agree Judith, “it is only by speaking out ourselves that this insidious pattern of silence is broken”. We cannot teach anything real unless we live it, we cannot ask children to speak up unless we are doing it ourselves, they learn by reflection, by the truth of what they see and feel.

446. What shocks me is that everyone expects people to tell the truth at all times and yet we will easily shy away from speaking up which is not the truth. As a teenager I see many people who will shy away from speaking out about something if it is wrong or if someone is doing something they shouldn’t.

447. Exactly Susie the adults are worse the bullying goes on in a sophisticated way through emails, abusing positions of authority, I remember speaking to a policeman about bullying and he said it was rife amongst the police — how can we expect anything to change when we are so deeply engrained in accepting abuse at many many levels.

448. What a poignant article Matilda, Thank You. I recall from young that when I pointed out something the response of others was not always pretty, and besides nothing ever changed. So I learned to shut down and even numb myself to those unacceptable things. We have a society in which pretty much everyone has learned this behaviour. Your article is a great wake-up call that it is vital to reverse this trend. Yes I may be out of practice – not having communicated for so long at times what I say may not be the most eloquent or graceful communication – however that is no excuse to ignore what I feel or to hold back. Thanks to Universal Medicine and articles such as yours I am reminded that “my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade.”

449. ‘too small to make a difference’ ? Rubbish – just listen to a baby cry – it makes us feel uncomfortable because they are expressing FULLY and we don’t like what they are reflecting so we try to shut them up. It starts really early but can be changed at any time. It’s a simple choice we can make.

450. I feel that when we don’t speak up when we see any form of abuse going on, we are effectively sanctioning it and guaranteeing it’s continuity and thereby declaring what kind of society we want to be living in.

451. A brilliant blog Matilda: “my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade”. I had never thought about this in the way you have explained it before – but it makes sense. If no-one ever speaks up, everyone is allowed to remain blind to what they are doing to each other.

     1. Absolutely Jessica! One of the most profound revelations Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon has offered me and us all, has been how complicit the ‘polite’ veneer is in allowing the rot to fester and proliferate in our society. It has been a truly effective gag on us of knowing and speaking how we are actually feeling. It keeps a superficial ‘niceness’ on things while all the time our foundations are being undermined. The ‘nice and polite’ acts as a hard shiny suppressant upon the font of pure and health-giving expression.

        1. Exactly Lyndy – “the ‘polite’ veneer” is most definitely allowing the world to rot, as it is apparently not polite to call out abuse when we see it

452. Thank you for a beautiful and thought provoking article, Matilda, – this really hits home. To feel and see what happens in the playground, which is a reflection of the world at large, is saddening and not ok. As a child I can also relate, to not speak up, to hide, to want to fit in, to not want to hurt any other’s feelings, not cause any disturbance and to not stick out. I am slowly relearning to speak up, speak the truth and stand tall in my own confidence and glory. This topic is crucial, for ourselves and the community and the world.

453. So many great points here Matilda and I whole heartedly agree. We have come to accept very low standards within our society, where as long as we are ok then we can ignore what’s going on around us and so no one steps up and says ‘what’s going on?’ We forget or ignore the fact that it all affects us anyway in one way or another so it is actually not worth it in the end – we are all suffering from an accepted ‘norm’ (which is so far away from what we can naturally bring) but as yet the majority of society don’t want to see that we are.

454. I completely agree Elizabeth. What Matilda has shared is a brilliant example of how our actions affect other people, and shows just how important it is for us to take responsibility in our daily lives for the choices we make. Indeed if we all were to begin speaking up a whole lot more and expressing I think we’d see a difference in our playgrounds.

455. Beautifully expressed Andrew. Many times I have pretended not to see the pain or turmoil in another’s eyes, not wanting to feel it, because as you highlighted it would have reminded me of my own pain which I was already avoiding…..but not any more, I no longer wish to avoid connecting with another, so now, ‘when I offer my eyes, I stay open’, (just read that in another blog) and so the other gets all of me!

456. I felt that same too Michael, well that is what was instilled in me at school! So I would play the weaker dumb game of pretending I did not know the answers or the truth when I did. It is something I am changing now and wow does life change and become so much simpler!

457. Matilda your insight into playground behaviours illustrates clearly the impact of this all pervasive “head in the sand” cycle we are together perpetuating. With every passing silence, with every swallowed truth, the world becomes duller, sicker and disharmony takes its hold. For a long time I have felt “I am worthless in the big picture and too small to make a difference” but today equally I am inspired by the teachings of Universal Medicine and have a sound understanding of the impact each persons choices have on the rest of humanity, our responsibility is grand and each spoken truth will inspire another.

458. A very poignant quote to choose Andrew, one that also shows me how I haven’t wanted to see the pain another is in because
     A. I might be responsible for causing it and
     B. I don’t know what to do about it, so best not to look and
     C. I hurt too and its too much to acknowledge.
     This attitude is rapidly changing as a consequence of meeting Universal Medicine, the more I heal my own pain within me the more I can connect to another and see their pain without the need to take it on or fix it. I am aware that there are still many hurtful things that are difficult to accept, as deep down we all feel the responsibility of these things, because we have kept quite for so long.

459. Matilda, you have summed up beautifully the dilemma I used to find myself in: Do I hide my true expression in: “the comfy, familiar habit of social niceties and rightness” or do I choose to respond to the ”emerging, urgent, ‘loving humanity’ demand for truth”. Today there is only one choice for me, and that is the one that humanity is starting to call for: to express truth in every moment – no more holding back, no more sitting on the sidelines accepting any normal that harms anyone in any way. It is time to build the foundation of a new normal, one based on love; respect; understanding and self responsibility; and we can begin to do this by speaking up!

460. Well carved out how much danger lies in comfort.

461. What I have found in the past is that I would be great at speaking up for others when I could see that something needed to be said but would not do it on my own behalf. Now I am finding that the more we practise at home with each other, the easier it is getting at work and when I am out and about.

     1. I resonate with what you said Julie about being great at speaking up for others – but would not do it on my own behalf. Like you I am finding it is becoming easier to express how I feel and say what needs to be said. Never too late to make positive changes!

     2. This is a great way to make a start on this Julie. Practising speaking up at home with each other gives us more of a chance of speaking up when we are out in the world.

462. Mathilda, I can see when we do not speak up everybody loses and the world stays as it is with its aggression, wars and disharmony.

     1. True Kerstin, it’s like when were not saying anything we are actually saying “It’s okay… lets continue these wars and living disharmoniously.. I’m not going to stop you or say anything about it.”
        saying nothing.. speaks loud and clear.

463. We may have the objective to change the world but this often just sits on a face that for far too long has just smiled and hardly ever used the most important bit – the voice – that can come out of it. Interesting things happen when we open our mouth and let our voice out, which has something to say that needs to be heard.

464. I haven’t been speaking up for a long time which means I am just as responsible for where we are at as a humanity. Every time I don’t speak up, I am saying yes to all the un-truth that is taking place on a daily basis.

465. Yes there is so much fear in speaking up. Fear of reprisals or abuse. Not many can see how standing up and saying no to something can be beneficial to all. With more education and with the power of saying no, maybe so many wont keep quiet. Thank you Matilda.

466. Every time we do not speak up we contract or become smaller. Let’s speak up with the Truth and grow bigger and better in love and in the light of God.

     1. Beautiful comment Jo and so true. I have definitely have been contracted and played small. I am now learning to express truth and love, and to connect to God. Feeling and knowing that God is always within me, beside me and all around me. When I choose to connect to that knowing, my fears of expressing truth in any situation will not exist.

467. Felixschumacher I really appreciate what you have shared. I can re-call being on the tail end of a comment and how hurtful it was. That’s so great that you do not allow anyone to talk to you in a way that’s unloving. How important is it that we claim those feelings and then others know how we feel, so that new choices can be made next time. That way we can build and deepen our relationships based on understanding each other.

468. So true Samantha, everyone’s voice matter.

469. Matilda what you are expressing is so vitally important. I can relate to not saying what is there to be expressed. And I am beginning to understand the significant consequences to this not only for my health but the health of the entire community. It’s no wonder communities are in situations as you have described because the majority do not speak out. As you say not speaking out is basically agreeing and going on with what is suggested and trying to fit it beyond all else. It takes great inner confidence and knowing of truth to be able to do this. How blessed we are to have Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine to show us how not to hold back and speak the truth and how important it is that each and every one of us play our part.

470. Beautifully exposed Fumiyo Egashira. Doubt is always waiting in the shadowy wings to pounce upon its prey. We must back ourselves to the hilt even if we are ‘wrong’!

471. Totally Simon. “The comfy, familiar habit of social niceties and rightness” is such a false game and we can see right through its flawed and cheap fabric. Well the game is up now and we say No to it and Yes to truth.

472. Life as it is currently lived is a masquerade pretending to be a life. You ask a real ground-breaking question here Matilda: ‘Are we hoping someone else will do something; are we making excuses for not putting our heads above the parapet to say “This is madness”, all the while trying to convince ourselves that it is all OK?’
     Most of us just want to stay comfortable and safe and carve out a life on earth that gets us through without too much agony . . . little realising that the agony lies in the fact that we have made this choice to not say what we truly feel, to not expose ‘the emperor’s new clothes’ for what they are. It is time to crumble the walls through the resonance of resounding Truth.

     1. Well said Lyndy. Comfort in life is a big thing for most of us but are we really comfortable. Most of us can feel when we don’t express truth the dis-ease we feel in our bodies from holding back knowing we should have said something.

473. So well said Richard. We are all ‘the one’ who can speak up and share truth. And, as you say, there is no middle ground to hide in as the ‘silent majority’. This is such an illusion and keeps us down as a race when we could be so powerful in our love and understanding to dispel the shadows..

474. I agree Jenny James. Our responsibility as adults cannot be underestimated here and we all have a role to play in the upbringing of children, even if we don’t have children of our own or work in an educational environment. We each have a responsibility to express in full what we know to be true, and through the embodiment of this as our living way we support all others to express the truth of who they are equally so.

475. To not acknowledge another’s pain is a sure sign for me that I have overlooked or overridden my own, pretending that if it is not seen that it is not felt. This I have learnt is a big lie and an illusion.

     1. Boom. That is brilliantly and succinctly expressed.

476. In the past, I’ve been caught in the ‘nice’ trap as well Rebeccawingrave, its such a toxic existence because it just allows what is toxic in the world to continue. It’s time to be the antidote and just let out what is true.

477. Something about the way you have expanded on this amazing blog Alexis has really resonated with me. Its got me thinking just how many situations I am silent or false, I am going to spend a day today observing this, that is the first step to true change I suppose. I just don’t think we even realise the enormity of it yet.

     1. Ah yes, sarahraynebaldwin, inspired by these comments I am willing to observe and consider the detail of my day and the stop start moments as I hold and express truth or not. Thank you.

478. Exactly felixschumacher8 – starting at home, with occurrences in our daily lives, allows us to build a foundation of saying no to abuse – rather than seeing it as an overwhelming issue in the world that we have little power to address.

479. Never too late- very very true.

480. Absolutely Bernard. Self responsibility, expression and accountability could be taught and instilled with children much earlier. The fact is that children are very wise and if the whole playground had the same tools and process to deal with the small situations, it would be very empowering and definitely eliminate the tell tales for the very minor situations.

481. Well said Samantha. And it is also a reminder for us to allow others, even encourage others, especially children to express freely about what they feel and have observed.

482. Bernard what a great comment. I have no doubt parents and teachers can get weary with settling disputes but I wonder if children aren’t taught how to settle disputes because those taking care of them haven’t mastered this themselves.

     Lessons in responsibility and not blaming is one that is well worth the investment. It allows everyone to grow and not continuously drain human resources.

483. Yes Ariana, a wise quote with an equally wise expansion. We tend to see the act of wrong doing different from not acting against that wrong, for instance being the bully bullying someone or watching someone being bullied and doing nothing is all the same.

484. Thank you Matilda, for an inspiring blog, it is amazing how one person can make such a difference, Serge is a great example of this power. I have been a person who has hidden all my life, felt deeply the injustice, but not speaking out. It is time to speak up and say that the horrible stuff that is going on in the world, is not ok, and this starts with me, saying what is and what is not ok for me.

     1. Yes we can make huge changes and have a big effect by calling out the little things in our everyday lives.

        1. It’s our everyday life where, life happens after all…

     2. Awesome comment Jill. I too am learning to start expressing what is not true and what is true for me. This is huge, as I have been too afraid before I was introduced to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine to express. Now my fears are melting away and I feel empowered to speak up, to communicate and to express truth and love.

485. I agree with your words Jade and reiterating your quote attributed to Albert Einstein, “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” – and brings to mind some of the moments where in my past years I could have said something when I felt something was not right – e.g. watching the older local priest ‘playing’ with young children in the local swimming pool in a country town where we lived – it was a belief at the time that the mothers who were supervising surely had to see what was actually going on so I said nothing to them – and springs to mind the old saying “there are none so blind as those who choose not to see”. Fortunately now, as a result of attending the presentations of Universal Medicine I can feel the depth of the words by Mr. Einstein and I have chosen to be developing my awareness and am no longer choosing irresponsibility when it comes to saying something when I can feel it in my body to so do.

486. That is beautiful felixschumacher8 and so true, it starts at home to not accept anything less than love setting, the foundation which leads to a ripple effect all around you.

487. Well said Adam, politeness and etiquette are so empty and so void of love. The fact is we all are made of love, so that is what we all actually want. And love is not ‘nice’, it is saying ‘no’ to what’s not in line with the truth that we all innately know inside of ourselves. There is no ‘rule’, but a simple knowing. What is now happening on a national scale, like some countries for example in Europe, getting into deep trouble; if more people would have spoken up when things didn’t feel right, as the corruption can be felt and seen by all, then maybe all this could have been avoided?

488. Wow Matilda, the power that we have, that each one of us has to make a change is strong. If every single person was able to say what didn’t feel right, and stand up for themselves or all those around them without fear of being reprimanded we would be living in such a different world. It is never to late to start speaking up and calling out what doesn’t feel right or seem right. We have many years of being able to inspire change in little situations, medium situations and possibly very large situations. But it must start with being able to speak up and share what doesn’t feel right in whatever way that comes across and over time it seems like it becomes easier to do and learning to do it more and more lovingly.

     1. I agree, about 7 months ago I found it extremely difficult to express myself and expressing truth was extremely difficult for me at first. But now I am learning to express more and more, it is becoming something very natural and very powerful.

489. I agree, Bernard. At times, the tell tale syndrome has been used to recruit others to one’s cause and thereby increase the isolation of the other who is being “told on.” Role modelling and teaching conflict resolution skills does allow children to unfold their knowingness of how to respond, rather than react, to situations. A feeling of safety is generated by knowing that a responsible adult is on hand, if required.
     Adults holding a harmonious space for children to interact within is a huge contributing factor in minimising skirmishes and conflict also.

490. I felt saddened when I read how we as children ‘start[s] to normalise the things that are not OK’

     I felt saddened because I have both been the child buying into the non-Love and non-Truth all around me, and because I have also been the adult who has stood by and said nothing when appalling behaviour is exhibited around me. I too have been the purpetrator of horrid Love-less behaviour.

     Thank God that one man chose to reflect something different in the school yard of life.

     The ripple effect of this one different choice by Serge Benhayon to live Love is huge and still continues to unfold.

     I am proud to be a part of this Loving unfoldment within our society at this time, and committed to continuously expanding/deepening my expression, both of Love and of (Lovingly) calling out what is not acceptable within our families, communities and society!

     1. So true Pernilla, I know that without seeing Serge Benhayon and the way he lives I would still be living thinking this behaviour is normal and it’s okay to be normal. I am glad I am not in that fog anymore… although I also feel saddened in knowing that I have not been the one to stand up for truth and put myself out there in that way. It’s scary how much this behaviour becomes embedded in our bodies… now it’s up to me to choose to come out of that.

     2. This is so true to observe the ill that goes on around us is one thing, but for me it is as you have shared accepting the fact that I haven’t stood up or spoken out when needed means in fact I am a perpetrator as well. This feeling is very uncomfortable to feel but it’s true by not speaking out or supporting others when needed we are adding to it. Matilda asks the question ‘What happens when I/we do not speak up?’ I want to add ‘Why do I/we not speak up?’

     3. Beautifully expressed Pernillahorne. I too am very inspired by Serge Benhayon and his commitment to living with truth and love.

491. So true Sandra, it’s such a crippling belief to think we cannot make a difference and question the norm of how we live and what is going on. Imagine if Serge Benhayon stayed quiet! Universal Medicine and the hundreds of students are proof that we can make change and live a life of Truth and Love.

     1. Such an awesome point to ponder on Rachael: “Imagine if Serge Benhayon stayed quiet! ” I for one am so very thankful that he didn’t, and I know hundreds of others would agree. Now it’s my turn to speak up and share what I have learned and know to be true. My holding back not only hurts me, it hurts the world!

492. Dear Lucy, I like the point that you make here, that speaking up doesn’t mean we have to become activists and hurt ourselves in the process. But if we all started to speak up, in our own areas of life and influence, things will slowly start to change, as we leave a different imprint. If we all start to speak up, activists won’t need to put themselves into danger, but speaking up and making a stand will just be a part of our everyday way of being. Serge Benhayon and his whole family, and many of the Universal Medicine students are the most inspiring examples for me of what that can look like.

493. To speak the truth can be uncomfortable as people may not want to hear or listen, there is a tension that is not always easy to endure as there might be an attack or ridicule or other intense behaviours towards us. However learning by doing it becomes more and more a natural expression of truth as this breaks the uncomfortable silences with what is true. And supports both our physical and mental health and well-being. Thank- you Matilda for an awesome blog.

494. Beautifully put Elizabeth, that was exactly my feeling; it brought back moments where I should have spoken up, but did not. So I have played my part in this as well. I like how you express that it can feel awkward to start express and voice what you feel after not speaking up for such a long time. But it surely is worth it. It is up to us, each one of us, and nobody else.

495. Matilda, what you have written is golden. Sure the school playground is the learning stage of not speaking up while it is so visible to all. From my perspective as 71 year old, things have not changed that much, bullying and verbal abuse is still part of our society, which is self evident in every walk of life. As you say “Simply put, and in conclusion, my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade. Not OK!” Thank you.

     1. Yes. Whether a 7 year old or a 71 year old, we are all responsible for the society we have and for this sorry state of affairs whereby this abuse is allowed to carry on un-checked. That said, whether a 7 year old or a 71 year old, we all also have the power to effect great change. The ripple of one person standing up and holding their ground against what they know to be wrong is ginormous. Imagine if many of us started to do that.

     2. And this makes me think of something else. So many of us absolve responsibility for our society to the politicians, leaders, media, lawyers etc..But what this powerful blog highlights is how the true responsibility lies with us, each of us. I might also add that we (by which I mean regular members of society) can be far more effecting of change than any number of politicians. It is us who are living in and amongst humanity, with colleagues, friends, families, children who have the real power in our feet (standing up) and voices (speaking out). If we connect to society and humanity and set an example of NOT standing-by, then great change can happen…very fast.

        1. This is very true Ottobathurst, we do abdicate responsibility to those we (ill) consider have the power to bring about change, forgetting they are representing (and reflecting) the communities who have elected them. If we stay silent, so will they!

        2. It’s so important to really consider this. Deeply. I don’t always. Sometimes I don’t consider the ripple effects that we all have. And as you so pertinently say Jenny Ellis, if we stay quiet then so will they. More and more I am seeing this and appreciating it. The world just isn’t set up this way. Sure we all know that standing up and speaking out is a ‘good’ thing to do (if it is done in the right way – but that is a whole other conversation). But what we don’t consider (and I have only started to see this for myself in the last eighteen months) is how harming, doing nothing is. On a surface level it doesn’t make sense. “I’m not doing anything, so how can I be doing damage?”. Which is how so many of us live, how so many of us hide from our responsibility. The Einstein quote is well known and says it all. And now I am really seeing and feeling that doing nothing is actually doing a very great deal…..of damage.

        3. Also! It reminds me of a quote “If you don’t know what to do, then don’t do anything”. Which I now see is wrong in TWO ways. Firstly, we do know what to do. Always – and if we think we don’t, we are just in comfort or hiding from our responsibilities. Secondly, doing nothing, is not doing nothing. Doing nothing is saying yes to whatever is going on. There is no ‘nothing’. There is no status quo, no wait and see, no limbo. This is so vital for us all to understand.

     3. Being a bystander is something I have done for too long, observing, knowing and allowing to happen. It feels horrible when standing up for truth is what implements change.

496. It’s so true Matilda, this is deeply disturbing that we as a society have not managed to foster that everybody has a right to express what they are feeling. We have accepted things to be ‘normal’ that are cruel and mean and harmful. And if someone dares to speak up they are judged for it and can expect a backlash. So much horror and wrong-doing is going on but we don’t speak up; we all lose, nobody wins.

497. ‘This foundation is then built into our lives and society’ – this is a great point. As for me it raises the question: what foundation are we allowing to develop in our society when we allow our children to feel imposed to discount their truth, to over-ride what they feel is true? When we ourselves bury our heads in the sand with what is going on in our world and in our relationships we are inviting our children to do the same. This is not normal. ‘If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative.’ – well said Matilda. It absolutely begins with ourselves first. Through Universal Medicine I have been inspired to re-connect to my truth and express my truth and with this I have discovered that there is another way we can truthfully live. That by choosing to be honest and taking responsibility for how we choose to live we can all bring true change to re-build the foundations in our society.

498. We cannot support our children to speak up when they experience abusive behaviour if we as adults are not prepared to speak out against abuse of any kind ourselves. We all feel when something is abusive but we have learned to override what we feel and pretend it is not as it is. We cannot stand idly by while we imagine someone else will fix the world’s problems, we all have to do it and we can do it by not tolerating abuse ourselves, within our homes, within our relationships, within our workplaces and within our lives in general. That way we will be true role models of change.

     1. Great to read your comment Elizabeth, ‘We cannot support our children to speak up when they experience abusive behaviour if we as adults are not prepared to speak out against abuse of any kind ourselves’, this is an ouch for me as I often say to my son to speak up when something does not feel true, or feels abusive, but I do not always speak up myself, I can feel how I’m not being a role model if I allow abuse and choose to be polite rather than say what feels true.

     2. This unfortunately is the truth of it. It doesn’t work to preach “do as I say, not as I do”, as history and life shows us. True change comes about from personal responsibility in each and every moment and from inspiration taken from people who “walk their talk”, such as Serge Benhayon.

     3. Exactly Elizabeth! the children are only copying what they are already seeing us as adults live. If we don’t call out untruthful behaviour in our lives of course the children will pick up on that and then they have the option to choose it as well. This gives us as adults a much higher level of responsibility.

        1. This is so true arieljoymuntelwit, ‘the children are only copying what they are already seeing us as adults live. If we don’t call out untruthful behaviour in our lives of course the children will pick up on that and then they have the option to choose it as well’, I notice how children do copy behaviour that they see in other children and adults and so seeing adults stand up for truth feels really important.

499. Matilda, I wholeheartedly agree, whatever goes on in the world ignoring it is not the answer. We all need to stand up for what is truly going on, and when one stands up others will stand beside them, and no matter what your truth will be known.

     1. very true Sally.. it is hard to feel how long I have just tried to ignore what is going on. There is no way around it, we need to feel it and express what we know deep down inside is the truth, in a world full of lies and re-interpretations.

     2. Sally I whole heartedly agree that ignoring is not the answer. I have observing recently that agreement to keeping blind to what is not ok, is being left alone to carry on and continue in the illusion and comfort that all is fine if the boat isn’t rocked. The initial few who have stood up and have been attacked for doing so have others now standing beside them. Hats off to those who have chosen truth first and stepped forth. They have said no to the comfort of sitting silent. Theirs is a majesty inaccessible through comfort.

500. Wow Matilda a really powerful contribution that really made me pay attention. I feel it’s so true what you have shared and how from a very young age we learn to accept the unacceptable as normal. Time for me to shake off any fears that stop me expressing what is not acceptable and indeed very harming to the world!

     1. Sharon same here, there is no wonder the world is in a state we don’t want it to be or don’t like to see it is as every generation has been taught to ignore the truth and to accept what feels unnormal to be normal. Time for a change to support ourselves to speak truth and in turn to nurture the next generation to share what they naturally feel without fear of how others may react.

        1. That’s huge David as it would change everything if people could express without fear. Less need for counsellors and therapist I imagine without all the held in feelings.

501. I can feel in this blog and the comments shared that there is great need for us all to be part of true expression, the call is loud and clear. For if we sit back and allow what we know to be false, harmful and poisonous play toward each other to continue then everyone stays further away from their true state of being and connection thus perpetuating separation. I feel we are deeply hurting from not being in True Love with each other and expressing that in all we do. We are all connected.

502. Silence is acquiescence? – thanks Matilda “That, and in my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine”
     Magnificent.

503. Well said Jenny, it makes sense to support the kids in there authority, not to say that speaking up and working on our stuff is not important too but giving equal focus to the next generation, fostering and encouraging them to speak truth is a great way to guarantee a different type of future which will benefit all anyway.

504. So well said Matilda – there is so much ugliness we see and feel everyday and as awkward as it is to have those conversations they are so powerful. I had one such conversation at work recently and I trembled and felt vulnerable having no idea how my insight would be received and as confronting as it was for my colleague to hear certain things it was well worth it as we both came to a truth that the quality in which we do things matters more than the volume in which we get things done. Little by little we restore the harmony we all deeply miss.

505. From what I remember of being really young at school, I would never speak up about how I felt because all I wanted was to be accepted by the other kids and be safe in a group where I didn’t feel alone. Once that was secured I was the one pushing other’s out and bullying them so I didn’t loose my place in that scene and safety. At least the other kids spoke up about my behaviour and the teachers let me know it wasn’t OK!

506. Yes beautifully expressed Andrew. Acknowledging the disharmony is there has in my experience allowed me to receive another person and open my heart to them.

507. I love that Felix, instead of being overwhelmed with the enormity of it, bring it back to the simplicity, change begins in the self.

508. This has got to be up there with one of my favourite blogs written. I love the parallels that you draw with school yard behaviour in direct relation to the world politics. When you put it like that everything seems simple and it seems crazy that we are all just playing along. I will share this article everywhere as I truly believe the world needs to hear this. I am warning you I will have to make many more comments on this as I am just so inspired by this, thank you Matilda.

509. So true Aimee, with our silence we willingly allow the evil to reign which, when felt, is almost unbelieve-able that we would do such a thing. So thick is the illusion that ‘nice’ is heaven sent.

510. Hi Matilda, great blog and so very true, saying nothing is condoning the world in its lack of truth and the fact that it is witnessed in the school yard is no surprise since we copy our parents and those around us. If we all ignore these behaviours and stay quiet nothing will change. Time to speak up. Actually its always been time to speak out but with growing awareness of the situation comes more responsibility to talk about it. Thanks for a thought provoking blog.

511. Interesting point here Adam. So what is a good citizen exactly? Someone who obeys the laws of the lands? Someone who does not do anything too extreme that they will be caught or exposed? Meanwhile we know that many people who would pass this test live in a way that is deeply disregarding, disrespectful even abusive of themselves and others. Staying silent actually is a form of disrespect and disregard because we are saying that our own security and comfort matters more than the obvious pain and suffering we can see and feel in humanity. Perhaps we need to re-define what a good citizen really is? Someone who would not stand by knowingly if any human being was being abused or disrespected in anyway?

512. Zofia, your comment is so clear and full of strength, it’s spot on.

513. Matilda, thank you for sharing what you see going on in the playground these days, and I feel it is the same in our offices, homes, and on our streets. We’ve all contributed to this by not speaking up. Staying silent when something doesn’t feel right or is just not on, is basically saying ‘it’s ok’, ‘it’s not bad enough to say anything about’ or ‘I’m not putting my neck out’. It is insidious and sad that this is happening amongst children who are learning this way from what they see around them.

514. Considering deeply your comment sjmatsonuk. I feel there are a number of things happening here. Our children learn how to be in the world by being in ‘Family’ first by having the love, support and encouragement to speak up, so this becomes their way. They then have those experiences behind them to support their holding themselves when speaking up out in the world, in the playground. Who are the parents protecting really? Are the parents closing their eyes because they are still playing out the ‘roles’ learnt in the playground – keep your head down and then you won’t become a target. We have a responsibility to speak up and by changing the old patterns of the past we can change the present and also model for our children in our Livingness, that we have choices. Through speaking truth in every situation, moving and writing in truth – this will become the ‘Way’.

515. I love this blog Matilda, because it is so true and something i was reflecting on recently – how people don’t feel comfortable speaking up about things that make them uncomfortable – a joke at their expense, a comment made about someone else, or even just don’t to being hugged when they didn’t want to be – these are all things that matter, for if it doesn’t feel right or makes a person in anyway uncomfortable it matters, and yet we are conditioned from young to smile, ignore it and carry on, as I know I have done. The idea of speaking up and expressing that I don’t want to be touched or hugged by someone because its not right for me scares the pants off me – but why? Why am I scared to set my own bounderies for my own body – why do I living in a society that would perceive that as weird or impolite? Because as a whole and as individuals, we have all slowly allowed things to slide, letting abusive comments slip past and normalising arguments and tension as being healthy in a relationship. Is it any wonder we have problems with young teens having sex without full consent, or getting into abusive relationships, or war and gender inequality? Just the other day, a man came into the coffee shop where i work. He has made very sexist comments to me once before and I bottled up my hurt and anger and remained silent, as he was the customer, but this time the same thing happened, and he called me a dishwasher, temperamental, ‘fiery’, because i dared to talk back, and apparently unable to multitask because I was a woman. For the first time, I didn’t pass it off as a joke, or be scared by the fact I was a work – instead i stood my ground and spoke up, in such a way that he stopped, apologised and was able to stop and see what he had done. My manager, who has been politely laughing along also look shocked, not only that i had spoken up, but also at having to be accountable for what had been said, and allowed to be said by him. It felt great, and since then the man has not been at all sexist. As i once read some where, you must stand for what is right, even if you stand alone.

     1. I love the way you have said ‘No’ to the sexist expression from your customer in the coffee shop Rebecca. That takes real presence, strength and love. You have changed the way the customer/server relationship has previously stood and reigned – you have revealed it as a game, an ‘arrangement’, that allows all kinds of abuse and untruth of who we all really are. What a huge healing for your boss and this man – the love of a woman for herself and for the truth.

     2. Rebecca, great sharing and you’re right we’ve normalised what we allow for such a long time now that we’re expected to just grin and bear it, but as your example shows. What’s telling is often when people are called out or pulled up, they stop and feel what they did was not right and somehow it breaks this game we all play, where someone makes a remark and everybody is supposed to laugh along and be a good sport, even when it’s abusive. One thing that shocked me a little reading your comment were your words ‘Why am I scared to set my own bounderies for my own body’, as I know often I can live in a way that is scared to stand up for myself and say no. I’m learning and seeing more where this happens and starting to speak up, but it’s very much a beginning, as I’ve trained myself to get on with things, to push through and not to feel how much those abusive remarks or behaviours hurt, and in that I put myself last, and it hurts massively. So now it’s about unpicking those behaviours and speaking up to allow the breaking of this cycle.

516. Matilda, thank you for placing the responsibility to speak up squarely at the feet of each and every one of us.

517. And I wonder, what part of us gets satisfaction from not speaking up? what is it that makes lots of us stay in the tension of the polite silence? what do we get from it? It is not easy in the body, it fills the body with tension. Is it the “uncomfortable” comfort of trying to stay the same by not expressing, not evolving?. I am also re-learning to say things out loud, and making mistakes, but it is worth it.

518. Such an important and essential awareness you raise Matilda. It’s been a case of ‘don’t wake the sleeping giant’ I feel. However it is time we all wake up and honestly accept what it is we see and feel going on around us that is abusive in anyway to ourselves and or others. Only with honesty can we then be prepared for the possible next step to take. In the past I’ve looked at the enormity of abuse and harm and contracted into myself with the belief I’m one person what can I do? Now I understand with one step at a time I do know what to do when some thing happens in my immediate vicinity and I can respond with what’s needed then and there. As you say the ripple effect is so much more powerful than I’ve appreciated in the past.

519. This is something I too am in the midst of forever changing with myself too Matilda. All my life I have seen what is really going on but I chose to say nothing as I learnt very early on that people did not want to here the truth. As I now choose to speak up most of the time (still working on all of the time) I have discovered that while truth may make people uncomfortable at first in the end it is often felt as supportive and can bring about great change for all involved. If we look back in history at those who were willing to stand for truth and nothing else we will often find that in their time they were mostly derided or persecuted but today they are seen as instigators of great and lasting change in history and they are often the very people we are now inspired by.

520. In my experience as a Mum at Primary School (or Kinder or Playgroup) it does stand you apart from the other Mum’s who all stand around chit chatting and are not wanting a real conversation. But I continue to walk and stand at drop off and pick up, in my connection, knowing that I am not alone and eventually, there are other parents who approach me and a real connection is formed.

     You have called out the politeness, niceness and small talk and this is great, because it is all too easy to fall back into that to feel like you fit in.
     We need to prepared to be unpopular at times.

521. Matilda you are so accurate in your description of how we all are able to accept less in one way or another with relationships both intimate and nationally all over the world. It is a phenomenal situation of the greatest proportions and yet I love how you have given us the answers right here in your own words about living walking speaking the truth we feel and the ripple effects this can have. I have seen it and I know this to be true, it is incredible the power we all have to feel and express.

522. If we encourage and allow the young ones to speak up about injustices that are happening in the playground at school then we are fostering a healthy attitude in them. This then will support them to continue to express as they become teenagers and adults. I am now needing to deepen and develop my true expression in my latter life because as a youngster this was not encouraged, in fact , quite the opposite, I was often shut down by others if I was to speak about what I did not feel was true.

523. Violence, toughness, argument and conflict has become normalized in our culture. Changing the way we are with ourselves as students of the Livingness, to allow for tenderness, non reaction and reading the circumstances of life to garner understanding of others is the foundational change available for us all and which makes an enormous difference in itself. It then gives the strength and confidence to walk, stand, speak and write from this. Yes we all feel it if we allow ourselves to and Yes it is so important that we all know ourselves to be an equal part of the all with a very important voice that needs to be heard. To wake up those that have not been ready to hear and see, nor shown that there is actually another way.

524. I am tempted to write here Matilda that this is a ‘great blog’ and that it indeed is. However what you share here has a tragic element to it; I can feel my part in contributing to the rot you describe. Yes we are all responsible for what happens when we do not speak up! And it begins here in this context of responding to your blog as much as it is in the playground at school or other settings. A painful reminder and a welcomed one about the responsibility NOT to do nothing but to connect to the truth of love which we must hold back when we do not speak up. Thank you.

525. This is one of the first blogs I have read on speaking up in the face of being labelled a ‘goody-good’ or ‘tell tail’ and it deeply speaks my own experiences of what this was like for me too at school. When we felt the truth in these cases we never doubted or thought we were small. We were empowered by the truth so the choice to think we are to small is one we consciously make to hide.

526. Matilda what you present is so important and the playground example is spot on. We all have a responsibility to start to speak up. How else will we effect true change? I am learning too to connect more with my body – this is really helpful in instances when my head starts to convince me something I’ve felt isn’t OK might be ‘normal’. If I can connect deeply with my body I can feel what’s true and speak from there.

527. Matilda you make a very important point about this deeply harmful controlling consciousness in our society that stops us speaking up and saying things as they are for fear of being called a snitch. True Love and Truth which are qualities of the Soul as described in Unimedpedia – http://www.unimedliving.com/unimedpedia/word-index are now the qualities I choose to live by to the best of my ability. To not speak up against lies and abuse is to condone and participate in them. Speaking up can at times be an energetic thing – it does not always mean I literally open my mouth and verbalise. There are times when people say things or do things that are completely off and just the fact that I hold steady and nominate (without any judgement whatsoever) within myself what I have just observed is enough. The main thing is not to accept anything less than love as normal or who we truly are.

528. Thank you for speaking up Matilda.You have written a beautifully felt and caring blog. Everyone who reads this will agree with you, if everyone speaks up together the ripple effect will indeed be far reaching.

529. Matilda, the topic of truth is a crucial one and I am grateful that you have shared your observations. I know for myself that at age 31 I continue to uncover what it is that I feel is the truth in particular situations from the knowing and claiming that I can feel absolutely everything. It’s amazing to learn more about the way in which I began to override what I felt in place for the spoken word or to fit in with the crowd. Until Serge Benhayon, I didn’t have a role model in my life that spoke truth, unapologetically and unreservedly as he.

530. Boy oh boy, you nailed a point, where we as a society would read your article and be exposed to the lie (we have created ourselves): ‘That we don’t have any influence on the bigger picture in the world’.
     The whole point of us individually not being strong enough to have any influence on the so called ‘big’ events in life (such as wars, domestic violence, discrimination and crime) is being opened up to the straight and real fact: we can, and we have.
     As you speak I can feel I have been contributing to illness and disease, crime and violence, war and cruelty, fear and destruction – because I have not stepped up and let the truth come out of – speaking with my voice and letting be heard, what is right and what is wrong. This responsibility we all have, this is our contribution. This is at the same time offering us to make a real and true difference in all those matters. We have the power to change, as we also had the power to disgrace and pollute the earth as we can all see we have contributed doing.

531. I used to think arguing was good, ‘healthy’ for a relationship, but it just added to the wall of competition and eventual mistrust because the argument was based on always being ‘right’ rather than coming to a joint understanding of what in fact is true. If ‘right’ persists on both sides then the gulf of separation deepens.

     1. Oh boy, this is a beauty, Jeannette Macdonald. Arguing in relationships being seen as healthy – arghh – getting the last word and being ‘right’ reducing us all to isolated spots in a world that yearns for unity. THANK YOU for the succinctness and simplicity of your writing.

532. When we standby and say nothing in the face of something that we know is wrong we are just as complicit as if we had been the instigator. The bystander effect is a huge problem in society, oh well its not directly happening to me so I won’t say or do anything. But in not speaking up we are saying that it is ok for that behaviour or situation to continue and repeat and even worsen.
     We all inherently know when something is wrong and it is only by expressing and speaking up that we can start to make a change.

533. Brilliant blog Matilda. “I can start to practise speaking, writing, standing and walking from a truth I know inside, OR I can continue to play the social game – the well-oiled machine of my beautiful manners, well-rehearsed small talk and polite pleasantries.?” I have been playing the social games for a long long time not wanting to stand out and not choosing to be aware of the fact there was another way. Now I have been inspired deeply by Serge Benhayon and all students of Universal Medicine to feel again in my body what is true for me. Because I now feel again what is true for me in myself I am more and more confident with expressing this in the world. I start to feel that if I do not practice to speak up, talk about things or write about things that concern me, the world will stay as it is. If I start to express and communicate what I feel is truth and what is not true there is a grand opportunity for change.

534. I totally agree with what you say Matilda, we learn at an early age to keep quiet and not ‘rock the boat’ for fear of retribution. I’ve always had a strong sense of what is fair and at school would call out what I saw as unfair, this was labelled as tale telling and the result was being ostracised. I see the same thing playing out now with the present generation and it is as you say a microcosm of the macrocosm of what is being acted out on the world stage. We need to address what is happening in playgrounds and make it safe to tell the truth if we wish to address disharmony and bring about change to the culture.

535. hi Matilda, I have been very concerned about what goes on in school recently and I have been questioning what is accepted behaviour nowadays. It is normal for kids to swear, use aggression on each other, fight in the play ground even if a teacher is watching. It is called ‘rough play’ and as long as it doesn’t escalate it’s ok. Heads are turned, a blind eye is given to this behaviour so now it is a daily occurence and has become the norm. The children rarely speak up because this behaviour has been accepted. This is my experience of the school my son goes to and I shudder to think that this may be the norm in many schools. On the outside all appears well, the children may even achieve good grades but just under the surface there is a huge amount of tension and behavioural issues that seem to be discounted as not as important as good grades. If schools were measured on children’s behaviour in school, I wonder if then it would receive the much needed correction?

536. Awesome, Matilda. Reading your blog I was reminded of the ways that we are convinced that speaking up and speaking the truth has been so paradoxically demonised in our society. On the one hand if you witness a crime and do not report it you are guilty of a crime as well, and on the other hand if you blow the whistle on a large company or the government who are committing a crime you can get in trouble for that.

     But the truth is the truth, and there is never escaping it. Once it is felt that something needs to be expressed, it will come out in some way somehow. When we follow the initial impulse of truth it always flows so much easier, than if we hold it in, and then have to deal with can develop into an actual physical discomfort before expressing it in some way.

537. What you share is massive and one of the biggest evil of human life. History is full of bystander stories. It looks like the Will to stand up and speak truth has been corrupted by the comfort of “one life” thinking and the hiding in supposed security. But what if human life is just part of an ever returning cycle and one time we live in the save spot of not being affected and next round we are living the consequences of this so save bystander life? How would we decide then?

538. You make some great points here Matilda, especially ‘my polite silence means I am part of letting the rot continue and pervade’ – for me this one line says it all.

     1. I agree Julie, that line says so much. Being a bystander, an onlooker to anything that is not of love is basically saying ‘it is ok’.

539. Matilda, what a wake up call for all of us. I could feel the “ouch” for me in what you had written here. The fact that children are suppressing their feelings so much at school means we are shutting down our light at such an early age now and that is a tragedy for us all.

540. Hello Matilda Clark and thank you for this blog. This is one of my favourite quotes, ““The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.” Albert Einstein” I agree there appears to be a societal attitude of ‘just look after yourself’ and it does start with the children. I go back 20 years and most people would know everyone in their street or at least be aware of their names but now people are lucky to see their neighbours let alone interact with them. We need to look at what is considered ‘normal’ and continue question what that looks like and see how it feels. I always do a 20 years forward test on things, ‘how will this look in 20 years?’ On most occasions I don’t like what I see in 20 years and again with what you are saying I would say the same thing. I agree and as you say, “That, and in my willingness to re-learn to say things out loud, I can make a difference and the ripple effect of this is much more far reaching than I can possibly imagine.” If you don’t feel the way something is headed will support anyone then it is time to speak up about it. As you say Matilda the ‘ripple effect’ can be far greater then we could imagine but we shouldn’t continue to look sideways for someone else to do it.

     1. I like this ’20 years ahead test’. It diminishes the ‘self’ in the moment and focuses on the big picture and our responsibility as part of a whole. It also diminishes my ability to worry about reactions that might come from my stepping out of the line of social niceties and stating the truth of how things are. Thank you, Raymond Karam.

        1. Thank you matildaclark and yes I feel we all need to be willing to be leaders in our field. If we get locked into a day to day style of living it seems to leave you at the mercy of everything. We need at times to keep our heads up and look at the direction we are headed. As a society just because something has been labelled ‘the norm’ doesn’t mean it is to be accepted blindly. We need to feel ourselves how it sits and then be able to stand in how we see things even if it goes against the ‘norm’. It would be a different story if we as a society were going super well but at this point we can see that is not the case. There has been a continued rise in illness and disease as well as what most organisations locally are calling a “disconnect”. Many are seeing that people aren’t connecting with each and this is becoming more and more frequent. Could it be possible that everything is built from around how we connect with each other? From my experience this is certainly true and it is not normal for it to be any other way. Success is measured for me first on how people are going and not on what they do.

541. Thank you Matilda for so clearly showing the ill consequences of not speaking up. It really puts it into perspective that our actions or in this case lack of action has a much bigger effect than we may want to see.

542. The playground is indeed a brilliant micro of the world. That is where we as children take our first steps into the big wide world. If we cannot speak up there and feel safe to express our truth, then where can we?

543. By standing by and saying nothing to avoid ‘getting involved’, people are supporting the problem to get worse.

544. I used to think that I did speak up for truth, and recently became aware that the wasn’t really true, that on many occasions I had not done so, particularly when I needed to speak up for myself, not others. It was quite a shock to realise this, and to discover how hard I found it to speak what I was feeling. It would be, I was out of practice. I have also realised that I must speak up quickly, as soon as something does not feel quite right, because if I don’t, I either start to doubt myself, or find that by the time that I do speak, what I say is laced with resentment or anger that has built up from me not expressing.

     1. So true Catherine that we need to speak up at the time – when I don’t, my message gets filtered and doesn’t come out clear and the other person doesn’t feel the truth of what I’m saying even though the words may be correct, it is laced with something else.

     2. The life long habit of putting others first. Thank you Catherine, this is yet another subtle way that we use to not only not speak up, but to put ourselves less than another, which inadvertly sets up the struggle we have in saying how we feel. Very clever set up when I look at it this way. Learning and feeling that we are all equal is the only antidote to cutting this long held behavior that I personally have found.

545. You are so right Matilda, the school playground is a good look in at the way we deal with issues, or not as it were. I have learned so much about taking responsibility for myself and the way that I feel through the presentations of Universal Medicine, and with this I can no longer just stay quiet or passive aggressive. When something is wrong I say so now rather than looking the other way… at home, work and in the community, I understand that by staying quiet I am saying yes to what is not right.

546. To have a look at the playground as a micro world is really vivid, to become a feeling for the bigger picture of people, once (this lifetime and before) have learned, to not speak up for what they truly feel. I consider to allow myself more to avow, what I observe is cruel and harming in daily interactions. Realizing, that the harm is contained to a very very very subtle level, what we in a normal social interaction won’t acknowledge to be harming when it all the same is from the origin energy within. So I start to discover in reverse, up to wich level I accept harm and have learned to overwrite it instantly. It is so important, to detect the energy of harm itself, to not accept it in any way, shape or form, whatsoever. This is an ongoing learning and relearning, starting with exposing the many ways of harming oneself. Once I have stopped to accept self-harm, I am able to stopp it in general. As a work in progress, of course and so worth it for to change the world into a place, where children will feel safe enough, to speak about what they truly feel.

547. I have always said that I would rather know whats wrong than to not hear anything at all, this to me feels like a truth and yet I know in the past I too have played the head down, mouth shut game. Pretending to not feel is essentially asking us to live a lie and the tension we live with forever more is unbearable, is it any wonder that as a humanity across the world we seek distractions non stop to keep up the avoidance game? As I have started to take more notice and be aware of what I do feel there have been thoughts of ‘that’s crazy/out there’ but these feelings make more sense than anything the outside world can rationalise or endlessly explain with many fancy or complicated words. Our feelings make life make sense so why have we all chosen to play this game of pretend?

     1. “Our feelings make life make sense so why have we all chosen to play this game of pretend?”
        So beautifully said Leigh a wealth of wisdom held in this sentence.

548. Dear Matilda, very well said, it does to matter if we are on a school playground or out in the world there, it is time that we learn to speak up again. Speak out what is not of truth and to learn not to be afraid of reactions – as there will always be ones. But the ripple effect you wrote about is the important part here. We do no know how many feel and think the same and just do not dare to speak up. Everyday we have the opportunity to speak what we truly feel – at home, at work, with friends and even strangers. Starting with little things helps to build up our confidence when big things have to be addressed. And at the same time we learn to react less and speak more form an observing position which makes situations less emotional and dramatic.

549. Thumbs up for this superpowerful blog! And yes, I can make a different- we all can.

550. Hands up – I’ve been one of those people who has held back witnessing situations that needed someone to speak up and express with a clear voice – and to stop and cut those destructive behaviours of what is truly going on in the world. Saying things in the confines of my own thoughts of what I should or should not say and what a possible outcome could be. We all know this can be a dubious place of hiding and concealing what we truly feel. Little by little the more I express the confidence grows. To not hold back leaves a much lighter, expansive feeling in my body but also brings awareness to those destructive behaviours which need to be exposed. Thank you Matilda for finding your voice and expressing so beautifully in your sharing with us all.

551. Wow Matilda Thank you for speaking up calling what is really going on and making a difference that we can all feel in the absolute truth of all you are saying. Your strength and power is felt with the deep knowing that things need to change and that it is up to us all to do this for ourselves speaking up and calling what is not loving behaviour for mankind. It is our responsibility and this clear and ‘polite silence as you say means I am letting the rot continue and pervade’ From the school playground as the former of life, things need to change and it is from here we make the first difference. I know this as it was in the school playground at 6 years old that I stood up and called out what I saw was going on that was not true and loving only to be bullied and blamed myself and hence learnt to stand back and say nothing and have lived with this all my life. It is thanks to Serge Benhayon his family and Universal Medicine that I am learning to speak the truth of what I feel and see again and this is an unfolding journey of love and empowerment. I love the quote “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. Albert Einstein”.

552. An excellent blog Matilda that really grasps the nettle and does not dodge the issue. Everything starts at the playground and then can continue as a pattern throughout our lives. I too have held back and been polite and I can now see that this is deserting my responsibility to speak up in the world when I know that things are not OK. As you say the world is a ‘dangerous place’ and when we participate in the silence we are contributing to the rot.

553. A very powerful message you deliver Matlida to us all, which inspires me also to continue to express what I feel is truth in every moment with whoever is in front of me, without hesitation or fear of reaction and if reaction, this is something I do not have to take on or be afraid.

554. You have said so much here Matilda to open topic for discussion and to actually start to bring about the change that is needed. I am not surprised young children do not feel they can speak up, only the other day in the news I was reading how children as young as 8 are suffering from anxiety and worry about their body image! That’s shocking. Why am I not surprise? Because we have all been silent for eons not addressing things that need to be addressed, so much so that is now affecting the next generation at a very young age. So it is great you have seen and expressed this also knowing to speak out at school and be the person to make that change in turning it around; urging all of us to do the same. Thank you.

555. Without the direct inspiration of Serge Benhayon, who I have known to unequivocally speak and deliver the truth for some fourteen years now, I can say without doubt that I would still be in the woods in regards to expressing the truth – and consistently so.

     Though I was very strong in this as a child, ‘life’ got to me – I basically was eroded by resistance to the truth I said (frequent), and a sense of deep frustration, futility even, that no-one seemed to regard my penchant for all that was true, in the same way and absolute regard as I did. Don’t get me wrong, there was plenty I eventually succumbed to where I compromised on the truth I knew – particularly in the seeking of approval and acceptance from others. Yet underneath, the truth and its glaring, yet brilliant obviousness, without a doubt remained.

     What I also have no doubt about, is that without meeting Serge Benhayon, I would have remained withheld in my expression of truth – it would remain curbed, the edges softened… I would have turned a blind eye (well, I would have kid myself that I did) to corruption, and all that makes what you share here Matilda, absolutely not ok. Today I regard myself as an ever-developing work in progress, yet I am most certainly NOT in the withdrawal I had allowed myself to get to before meeting Serge Benhayon – case in point of WHY we all need to reclaim and express that which we know. For if ONE can make such a tremendous difference, what can many MORE of us truly do when we actually step out of the stagnancy of apathy, and do not hold back the truth that everyone knows, and craves to hear once more?

     1. The giving up is enormous Lucy, isn’t it. As a society, I don’t feel that we truly want to get in touch with this, or see the extent of the rot… for what does it lead to in later life, if in our younger years we see no avenue in which to say what’s true? What does it mean if those we are looking to as role models – parents, teachers, peers – are complicit in the ‘standing by silent’?
        What occurs within us – every single time – when we repress the expression of truth, and bury it somewhere within under a leaden weight of frustration and futility?
        This cannot bode well for our health and wellbeing – emotionally, physically and mentally.

     2. Well said Rowena. We accept so much that is harmful, so readily… Without voices of truth, and those willing to say it how it is, we would be completely and utterly lost.
        It takes someone of great strength and the deepest compassion to be able to say it as it is in the way Serge Benhayon does – as you say, relentlessly expose the ‘ills in our world’, and yet at once, deeply confirm the truth of who we are.
        Serge Benhayon is the most powerful role model I know of in this regard, and an unwavering inspiration in terms of solidifying the ground upon which so many here are now finding their natural voices of truth to surface once again. Wow.

     3. Beautifully said Leigh. What a false construct it is, to be so led to ‘think’ that each and every one of us has no place to speak what is true, unless we have some series of university degrees or such that deems us so-called ‘qualified’?
        It is indeed no ‘rocket science’ – truth is known, felt and registered by us all. It’s up to us to honour it via its expression through us – every day.

     4. Ain’t that the truth Marika. This should be ‘lesson in health and vitality 101’ – expressing truth is not only good for you, it’s absolutely awesome! And, everyone can only, in truth, be the greater for it.

556. I for one can say that most often I kept quiet hoping someone else would speak up. But as you say, this silence is complicity and I no longer wish to choose this complicity. Speaking up can be a floundering exercise as you say, but I generally feel much more myself after having done so.
     Great blog, thank you Matilda.

557. Very well said Matilda, thank-you. You have stated a truth that every one of us knows, and yet the degree to which we continue to perpetuate such harm is, as you say, off the scale… Is this the future we want for our world, our societies, our children??
     A future where we and they feel somehow compelled to live “heads down, eyes averted” as you say. A future where “everyone suffers” when we stand by silent and do or say nothing in the face of harm, abuse, apathy, judgement, bigotry, intolerance, dominance, misery, pain….. the list goes on.
     I surely do not want this to be our future, nor our reality now, and am committed to speaking up – acknowledging the long way I’ve already come out of the withholding I once sat in, and yet in view of there being so much more to open to and embrace. For we don’t speak up in the face of what’s not true for ourselves only, we speak up for everyone.

558. It is a great question that you ask Matilda “what happens when we do not speak up”
     The extent of men’s violence against women is one of Australia’s most shameful secrets, Australia has a deeply entrenched and serious problem with family violence and abuse It has significant impacts upon the lives of men, women and children. It knows no boundaries of gender, geography, socio-economic status, age, ability, sexual preference, culture, race or religion. It’s the leading contributor to death, disability and ill-health in Australian women aged 15-44. “If we lost someone to a shark every single week, there would be, as there already are, laws to do something about it.” There are horrible things happening behind closed doors I believe this is what happens when we don’t speak out and when our children don’t feel met or heard.

559. As I open my eyes in the world I am seeing how many patterns of behaviour, particularly any that mean we – feel less than who we are, express less, speak truth, may make others feel uncomfortable or may stand out and many more, stem from how the education system is set up. I am not blaming the teachers as they are only behaving and teaching in a way that they have experienced and have been taught to control a large class of children. Neither is this way isolated in schools it is present in many areas of life even in our family life. I also know I have subscribed to not express how I am really feeling which means continuously holding back what is true, for most of my life and beyond. It is a pattern that floods most of the world and because of this it seems abnormal to express Truth which is I where I thank God for people like Serge Benhayon and his family for supporting myself and many others to open up, connect and express when truth is needed no matter what. Thank you Matilda for opening up the conversation around what is happening in schools and throughout life.

560. Thank you Matilda for sharing your sensitive observations of playground behaviour and cnsequences of children and staff not speaking up and accepting certain behaviours as normal. To me this a kind of sickness that infects and pollutes wherever it raises its head. I was recently sent an assessment of the current state of health of a disharmonious and under performing workplace team. When I read the brief, I saw immediately that an inability of colleague’s to honour feelings and communicatethem them honestly to each other was a major source of frustration, resentment and disharmony. So yes, the same behaviour is evident and infects many other contexts. What would help is if children and adults were shown the tremendous value of learning to express feelings lovingly and for them to feel the potential this has to heal individuals and benefit the whole.

561. Matilda, I see & hear this a lot from kids on what happens in playground &;how its not voiced at times for many different reasons. That is also a reflection on how we adults are living in not expressing what we feel & allowing things to play out & be part if thus vicious cycle of not expressing fully or sometimes not at all harming ourself & also others in the process.
     “The world is a dangerous place not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.”
     So very true. I have learnt through example of people/students around me at Universal medicine & living it myself that when I do express truth that I clearly feel it may make others uncomfortable but it sure is very healing.

562. ‘a society that does not want to open its eyes to what is really going on ‘, are we as a society aware that this is the stance that we really take? Do we not want to know what is really going on?

563. I love this blog Matilda. This not speaking up about those things that are blatantly not right has been going on for aeons and has to stop. As you say, ‘Children are nervous about telling people when things do not feel right because there is a culture of being labelled as a “snitch” or “grass” or ‘”ell-tale”.’ The pressure to suppress the horrors of life starts at this early age. Turning the blind eye, remaining silent, accepting anything less than love in relationships, is a huge disease of the human race and the only way we can get well again is to speak up, lovingly and through pure observation, without a SKERRICK of judgment.

564. May we all feel the support that is there for us to rise up to the power of expression in this blog.

565. There is so much here Matilda in your beautifully and honestly expressed blog. So much disharmony is caused by our inability to speak up. Staying silent to protect, not become a-target yourself. Is form of sickness affecting the ones who stay silent and those causing harm. From personal experience, not speaking up came from a lack of confidence, not being sure of myself, fearing offending others, or losing a friend. And yet doing so colludes with the perpetrators of abuse. Like you, I saw that doing nothing leaves everything unchanged. And yet speaking up can leave us exposed to more abuse and isolated. I’ve seen this happen countless times in organisations with workplace bullies, those who speak up victimised, ostracised, sometimes forced out.bLearning to honour and express my feelings honestly changed my world and in one instance removed a block that held everyone back including my self? Noneone gains when we hold back from lovingly expressing truth,

566. Thank you Matilda for speaking the truth about what is really going on in our playgrounds and our lives. It is quite exposing to see the behaviours and attitudes that our children “normalise” and know that this is what they are experiencing and mimicking from the world around them. But yes, thankfully we have been shown another way by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. And as always, the message is clear: Speak your Truth.

567. I love the sobering facts you have presented here Matilda and that there is a direct relationship between the ongoing conflict worldwide and the disharmony in our homes. In truth, the conflicts in global relationships are just bigger versions of the same family problems. And these we can actually start to address immediately.

568. Matilda this article calls loudly to all who have not spoken up – myself included. Today I am speaking up more and more and I will never stop speaking up again. I had lost my voice so completely that it has taken years to being to express the truth again, often when I knew that I should speak up or say something in a group I would feel so much fear in me and I more often than no give in to the fear and say nothing. Today I speak the truth even if it upsets people – it has to be said. What we have accepted as a one humanity is indeed madness on a massive scale and the time for being stifled and bound is over. You only have to look into the eyes & faces of the students of the Livingness, and you know that there is something very special taking place within these extraordinary human beings.

569. Thank you Matilda for this great gift to humanity. There is so much here for us all to consider how not speaking up when the truth is there to be said hurts everyone and allows division and separation between people.
     I especially love the line:
     ‘Heads down, eyes averted in case we see the same confusion and/or pain in someone else’s eyes and have to feel our own.’
     I can so relate to this, I have not wanted to see the hurt in others from them not living true to themselves and yes I get it – not wanting to feel my hurt too. I have also been inspired by the Benhayon family who are continually aware of the untruths that are all around us and in people’s relationships and they never hold back from speaking the truth, always in support of others. Gradually I have let myself feel the extent of these untruths , which is really the evil that keeps us trapped from living our truth. As I see this more I am more committed to speaking the truth I feel and not burying my head in the sand – it is an ongoing process that is deeply healing for me and others too.

570. What a powerful blog Matilda thank you. There is much to consider here and it is a big ouch to be mirrored in our lack of responsibility. As you write we are apparently unaffected by what happens at the neighbours or across the world but this is such a big illusion. The fact that we avoid looking into each others eyes just so we don’t get met by the same sadness and hurt that we are avoiding, as you so rightfully express, shows that we are all suffering in one way or another.
     I am feeling more and more the irresponsibility of not speaking up, enjoining the ‘normal’ and allowing for a society that is so full of hurt, rot and disregard. It is a big ouch but at the same time in feeling how we are all connected and none of us can be truly all we are unless each and every being is so equally, makes it actually quite easy to choose responsibility once again.

571. We are seeing in the behaviours of many of our youths, a reflection of a society that is not functioning in a harmonious way. Matilda you make a great point that unless we speak out against what is not right then we are actually saying yes. Thank you for reminding us of the huge responsibility we each have for maintaining the health of our society and modelling true values to our young.

572. Thank you Matilda. This is happening everywhere, no doubt in all playgrounds far and wide. Not speaking up, not expressing, has got to be one of the biggest ills we have as a human race. We have allowed far too much for far too long.

573. Matilda, this is great to explore. Social niceties are very familiar behaviours for me too. Building the trust and confidence in myself to speak my truth as needed is a continuous work in progress but something that is well-worth the practise.

574. It’s true Matilda, and as your blog aptly explores and as Albert Einstein expressed, the true harm in our society is when we observe, see and feel and do ‘not’ speak up for what we know is truth and / or not right. One small voice ‘can’ make a difference, and many small voices make one very powerful voice and can have a huge impact. Time for more of us to speak up and out in the truth that we know and feel!

575. Wow Matilda. I remember learning early on that being labeled a ‘ dibber dobber’ (Australian slang for snitch I think) would mean being ousted from your friendship circle and doomed to roam around alone. This concept seemed to be set on the premise that adults were the enemy, however, staying silent often meant allowing abusive behaviour. I found that when I did get the courage to ‘dob’ adults would swiftly put an end to whatever abuse was going on. It clearly paid to speak up yet I can feel that I still have hurts around the rejection tactics that were employed so early on… thank you for writing this and giving me an opportunity to reflect.

576. This is fantastic, I love the quote of Einstein, it is so so true. I also relate to being fearful of speaking up and found this sentence particularly inspiring; “and that my speaking the truth of what I feel and see in the world will not be treacherous, threatening and scary”. Not speaking up, not only within small groups, but also in government, politics and policies is what has allowed society to be the way it is today, with greed, financial issues, problems in politics, drug and alcohol abuse and violence as well as increases in rates of illness and disease.

577. Matilda, you have brought up the fact how we as children already hold back our truth in order to not get attacked or excluded and start to play the game and doing this we are more and more lost and withdrawn. The effect this has on others is frightening, because often they also stay silent and allow abuse happening. From your example I get more aware and sensitive concerning the abuse happening when not speaking up. Thank you.

578. Super well said Matilda, I have been pondering deeply on this very subject a lot recently and how much abuse I allow in my life towards myself or watching on as others are at the receiving end of it. And then to ask myself to ponder of the next level of this, and that is if I do not say anything then am I not complicit? To consider that I may not directly be the perpetrator but if I am witness to abuse and do not say or do anything then aren’t I just as bad? These things are always easy to pick and address with the big and obvious stuff but I am now looking deeper across all aspects of my life, at the subtle and not so obvious. Thank-you Matilda for an awesome blog, very timely and very much needed.

     1. Yes Terri-Anne well said. It is easy to see not speaking up as it relates to obvious abusive behaviours and situations, these might seem hard enough, but it is also true there are many, many instances where it is seemingly small things that are felt as ‘not right’ that can feel equally if not harder to speak up about. Learning to honor what I feel, and then developing the confidence to speak up for me comes from feeling the harm done in staying silent and as Einstein’s words point out, being responsible in that case for the perpetuation of the very evil we dislike so much.

579. Learning to speak up has also been and continues to be a difficult one for me. Staying safe by being nice, polite and not rock the boat is oh so familiar. I have connected with the importance of speaking up and expressing and I have found learning to do this is a bit like building a muscle, something to be worked on regularly, knowing that it will take some time but the strength and power of experessing supports the whole of our being. Ultimately through expression humanity grows, learns and evolves. If we let things slide and they stay the same, no one evolves and what a sad world this would be.

580. Wow Matilda, what you have expressed here is so powerful. I very much relate to leaning on the social niceties and ignoring what is so obviously there and felt by all… Your article has inspired me to step up to speak my truth more – thank you.

581. This is a powerful and slightly disconcerting blog. I’m going to be taking a good look at my own oscillation between what is comfortable and what is true … and then come back and read this again.

582. After shutting down my true expression from a young age, It took time for me to become confident again in speaking up about what or how I am feeling. If I can express from a loving and true place it is usually well received, and both myself and the person I am sharing with can move towards a point of evolution together. If I hold back, as you say, I hold everyone back, and am contributing to the illness pervading society today.

583. Matilda this is such a great reflection that you have shared. That at such a young age we choose to silences what we feel and not speak up because of fear. This basis is what I have known and I have chosen this by walking a very very long road in silence. A choice to actually not turn a blind eye and see that this is real and it is not going away and only festering even more. When we look at where the world is we can honestly say there is no true love and harmony going on, no true brotherhood where we care for all equally so. I have been a player on this play ground and I now choose to get off. To look at everything and see it for what it really is and to speak up regardless of where I am and who is around me. I know that the way I have been choosing has not been working so there must be another way and taking responsibility for my part in it is the only way this will start to change.

     1. As you say, Natalie, if we can simply accept that what we have been choosing to date is so not working, we are immediately willing and open to another way. For everyone that speaks up, that is one more voice setting the foundation for ‘this is not OK, let’s work together to navigate a new way’. The power and responsibility of us all.

584. I have spent my life up to this point playing the role of the child in the playground that feels something is wrong but not speaking up. It is a powerful message you share Matilda, not speaking up is not ok, it is as bad if not worse than the original sin as if we don’t condemn what is wrong then we allow evil to spread. There is a lot of evil in the world at the moment and what I am beginning to understand is how much of that evil is there in the smallest details that we allow to grow. Cyber abuse is one such example, such small acts of abuse online can grow into really disastrous outcomes, much like the playground bully creates a misery (often through words) that can spread and disease someones whole life.

585. ‘If we do not speak up and make ourselves heard, everyone suffers, getting used to a standard of behaviour between human beings that is cruel, divisive, aggressive and combative.’
     Thank you Matilda for stating it so bluntly how very important it is to speak up, because if we do not do so we create a world that is becoming crueler and colder by the minute. I am learning to open my mouth and speak that what I am seeing and with that open up my angle of perception for the world and not letting my fellow human beings and myself sit and live in that what we all know is not the loving and caring standards we are innately capable of.

586. Exactly. without someone standing up to call out the social games that we play, we all suffer. There is more to us than the need to compete, justify and defend ourselves.Thanks for so clearly exposing this. I really enjoyed reading your blog!

587. There is much to consider and reflect upon what you share here with us Matilda!

588. Matilda, it is a unanimous truth you share here… Very few of us speak up. Most of us settle for the “I’m OK, the war is raging elsewhere and I’ve got to look after myself and my crew..” TV and the news becomes part of the comfort, depicting cruelty and suffering that is outside our home, outside our reach and therefore we can remove ourselves from what is really going on. But what we have done is numb away a huge pain, a pain of having disconnected with people at such a deep level. Instead of deep connection we have pleasantries and politeness and letting ourselves ‘relax’ at the pub. But within, we are lonely, because we deep within we know truth and we know we made a choice to walk away from it and settle for something else in its place to try and stay ‘safe’. When we do choose to stop, to stand up and say ‘hey, what’s really going on here’, the numbness does start to go, and underneath the pain we’ve been protecting we start to feel the enormous joy of being in connection with our brothers and sisters once again.

589. Agree Matilda there is no middle ground . And if you try you will always come out half baked servicing no true course or purpose.

590. Matilda thank-you, as you simply put about ‘polite silences’, polite silences have never worked for me as the shutting down what needs to be said actually feels like a rot inside my body and I don’t sleep well at night knowing that I needed to express what I felt was true for me. One could say that speaking up has got me into trouble at times and yet the ripple affect was well worth it for all concern.

     1. ‘pregnant with discomfort’…that is such a palpable and accessible way to describe those moments when truth is withheld. We all feel it and it only takes one person to talk about it for the flood gates to open and for truth to wash through all the tendrils of ‘polite’. Thank you, michelle819.

        1. Yes in my experience when one person has the courage to go there and speak up, it gives permission to others to express the same. I know when I feel something but I don’t have the confidence to speak publicly about it but someone goes there, I feel confirmed in that I wasn’t imagining it. The self doubt disappears and I feel confident to join in the conversation. The key for me is to honour the fact that my feelings in the moment are real but if I am wrong in my understanding it is because my perception is being laced with an issue I hold, which will then get exposed. Either way it’s a win win situation.

591. So true Matilda, I have personally witnessed the apathy people have to respond to and express their feelings about any issue that may ‘rock the boat’. I can see how this has been perpetuated from the playground and into social life which often now revolves just around being on phones and not directly communicating and connecting with the actual person.

592. Matilda thank you for sharing your observations about what happens in the playground. What happens there is indeed representative of what is happening out in society and it is a shocker that we actively encourage our children to keep quiet and not express what they are seeing and feeling. Much damage is done to the individual, and society continues to live in its rot, not only blind to it but accepting it as normal! Learning to express the truth of what I am really feeling in all situations is a work in progress but one I am committed to doing. When I express the truth in the moment not only do I feel claimed but it also supports others to feel it and claim it for themselves too.

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