My Natural Inner Knowing – My Clairsentience

As a child, there were things I just knew.

I knew which family members I wanted to be near to or spend more time with.

When I started school, I knew who I wanted to become friends with. I knew when I met their parents and siblings how the family was and whether I felt comfortable to spend longer periods of time in their home.

I knew that dying was not the end; that we were connected to something far greater than this physical, material world.

I knew that to take drugs was not something I wanted to do, nor was it a wise choice.

I knew when I was full of breast milk/food and to stop drinking/eating any more.

I knew when I walked into a room if there was jealousy towards me, or if someone did not like me. (This included schoolteachers).

These are just a few examples.

I knew these things because of what I was feeling, rather than what I thought in my head. This feeling ‘thing’ was just there. I did not have to try or think about these things. I just knew.

As I grew older, I began to make choices that were going against what I felt.

Looking back, I see that I ignored what I was truly feeling a lot, and this choice to disregard my feelings often ended with very serious consequences.

As an 8 year old, when my friend simply asked to swap bikes, I said ”Yes” when really I knew inside that I wanted to say “No.” Within five minutes of the bike ride beginning I had fallen from the ‘much too big for me’ bike and had a broken ankle, which was put in plaster for the whole eight weeks of the summer holidays.

Did I learn from this? No.

At the age of 13, two more accidents ended with me having broken bones. On both occasions I made decisions that went against what I knew to be true. One of those resulted in a lifetime of continuous pain and discomfort.

After starting to go out with friends at 15 years of age and remaining the sober one who looked after my drunk friends, I eventually gave in and started drinking too, only to end up a very drunken mess enough times to learn the hard way that this was not a wise choice. I already knew this from my inner knowing, but I chose to put myself through damaging and dangerous situations, rather than honour myself and what I knew and felt inside me.

At 16 I met a boy who was interested in me, who was into drugs. I went into the relationship because I wanted to have a boyfriend, to be loved. I knew at a deep level that his drinking a lot of alcohol and the drug taking were not what I wanted to be around, but I overrode what I was FEELING because my mind said, “I want to have a boyfriend, it’s important to be sweet 16 with a boyfriend for the summer.” I said “No” to drugs for five months and then I tried them. I went on to abuse the so-called soft drugs, marijuana and alcohol, on and off, for a further 30 years, all the while, knowing that what I wanted was ‘purity.’

I was living the life of what was considered by onlookers to be that of a ‘Health Fanatic.’ Very conscious of what I ate and exercising, doing yoga, sitting in meditation, living in the outdoors, reading all the right books and into all things ‘a la naturelle.’ And behind that image, I was a drug user. I spent some years without these two drugs of choice. I put this down to the fact that I knew deep within that these choices were not true or supporting me in any way and were in fact very damaging. The drug use was not what I wanted deep within me, but I always ended up going back to it.

I am now 50 and I could go on with countless more examples of not following my deep inner knowing, my sixth sense, my CLAIRSENTIENCE.

Of course, there are also many examples of when I did follow my inner knowing. But what I find interesting is why it is that we ignore what it is we are truly feeling and knowing, even when we have had many previous circumstances that tell us very clearly from the experiences and consequences that followed, that we did not listen to what our inner knowing in our body was telling us.

What is it about the mind that ‘wins out’?

For me, it was about my expression. Being fearful to speak up and say what I knew. What I knew and felt from a place deep within that bypassed the mind. Fearful of the verbal attack that might come at me, or of not being liked, (i.e. If I don’t swap bikes, my friend may not like me anymore or I will have a conflict to deal with). I was giving my power away, rather than expressing what I was feeling.

There was also an underlying sense of abuse in the way I was prepared to put myself into situations that harmed, rather than honoured, myself.

This momentum of choosing abuse did not begin in this life. I knew I had been here before and I knew that these choices were a very old pattern that I could seemingly not so easily change.

I used to often ask myself the questions, “Why did I become so angry? Why did I become a drug user?” It did not make sense to me, because neither my family nor the role models around me made such choices.

There were countless situations where, even though I knew deeply that my choices were not what I wanted from a feeling within me and a knowing that came from something much bigger than me, I still continued to ignore, override, dull myself with drugs and food and music. I continued to play dumb and not speak up.

The choice to continue denying what I knew about the world of energy then became more obvious because there was an even deeper sadness about the choices. This explained the anger, as anger is just a form of suppressed and undealt with sadness.

Ignoring my ‘inner knowing’ has had consequences for me to feel that have been very difficult to bear and at times have been so uncomfortable that finally, they brought me to where I am today.

I am learning to express and speak up and follow what I feel to be true for me.

I have had to climb over a huge mountain to get to this place.

I have let go of so much, on so many levels, that at times I have felt such unrest that I wondered if harmony would ever be restored in my body and my life. However, what I am now feeling is the true energetic freedom that comes from being dead honest with what I am feeling and making decisions from that place. The feeling I now have and live within my body just does not compare to living with the anxiousness that comes with living life so that it looks like the picture or ideal I had in my head about how it should be.

I have only been able to come back to living from my knowing because I started to love myself – to really love myself, deeply. This is a work in progress, and I practise this every day, by continually making choices that are loving. This is what has made the difference.

So all the while I was reading the right books and living in a way that looked like I loved myself by exercising and eating well and doing self help courses, being nice etc., however on a truly deep level, I was not loving myself at all as I was using drugs and giving my power away and not honouring my CLAIRSENTIENCE – what I knew and felt inside, in my body: the truth that is the one truth for ALL, my connection to God, the universal laws that we are ALL unavoidably connected to.

I have learnt that it is not what I am interested in and reading about and the classes I am attending that bring change, but it is in the Way I Live and the quality I choose in everything I do every day that has supported me to listen to my CLAIRSENTIENCE. Expressing again from this knowing has brought true and sustainable change into my life, without following rules and regulations, but from listening to what I always have known, listening to the Divine wisdom of my heart that was there all along, just waiting for me to re-connect to it.

I have been inspired to live what I already knew by the presentations and teaching of The Ancient Wisdom presented by Serge Benhayon from Universal Medicine.

By Mary-Lou Reed, Arnhem, The Netherlands

Further Reading:
Seeing Is Believing…Or Is It?
Mental Awareness V Conscious Awareness
The Gift of Clairsentience: Reclaiming My Ability To Feel Energy

534 thoughts on “My Natural Inner Knowing – My Clairsentience

  1. Giving permission to ourselves to express what wee feel inside breaks this ingrained way of being ‘good’ and nice. Despite it implies a disregarding of what we know inside is true for us it is socially accepted, seen as the norm of how we should behave. It seems we have created a way of being that is completely against who we really are when in truth we came in to life being very clear and very all knowing of what’s true and what’s not.

    Thanks Universal Medicine for showing us that our Natural Inner Knowing matters, regardless if it is liked, accepted by others or not.

  2. “The true energetic freedom that comes from being dead honest with what I am feeling and making decisions from that place.” It is one of the greatest gifts we can give our selves is becoming ‘dead honest’ about our lives. We sugarcoat our lives so much as to not get real about how we are living and it really does us no good. Honesty is the best policy. And that can be hard when you have been living a comfortable lie for some time.

  3. We do know so much that is brushed aside and not honoured. As a child I had a very strong feeling that the education in the form of the day was not for me. Education crushes our innate ability to know, to wonder and to be amazed by the magic and beauty of God. Instead we are forced …yes forced to learn by rote and to regurgitate information from books that someone else has written in such a way that that the subject is as dry as sand. Is it any wonder that as children we give up at school because the way we are taught goes against every sense in our bodies, in order to survive we feel we have to switch off or dull ourselves down.

  4. As children we are not taught to honour our feelings of what we know to be true, many children find that their sense of knowing is not welcome either at home or at school so we shut down what we instinctively know. To me it’s like putting on a straight-jacket we are asked to conform to the rules of society so that by the time we reach adulthood we have closed down and become zombies. When I stop to feel this in my body it’s quite horrifying what we actually do to ourselves.

  5. Thank you Mary-Lou. It’s a crazy paradox that we think ourselves to be very clever these days but dismiss this inner voice in so many ways. We are all knowing ~ but only when we let our feeling senses be.

  6. Funnily enough today it became very obvious that I would feel something and then not act on it, then complication arose afterwards and I could clearly feel how I created that. To me it is very much avoidance of simplicity, being in my power and wanting identification that made me not just go with what I felt but with the excuses in my head.

  7. Overriding what we know and doing the opposite to please others or to gain recognition is a killer. How many of us go against what we feel and do not speak up; eventually this practice erodes away at us until we no longer know who we are.

  8. Our clairsentience is a great gift that we all naturally have, the less we override it the more we start to realise that it has great value and the less distracted we are, and the more able we are at being connected to our body the more we value our clairsentience.

  9. The more I find i honour what I know to be true and stay with it the more I get confirmed with what I have felt. We are all super aware beings just playing lesser thinking what we see and hear is all that can be possible when we are far more than purely physical. We are Gods playing lesser, pretending we can’t feel or know when we do all along.

  10. “what I am now feeling is the true energetic freedom” a beautiful claiming to live who you naturally are.

  11. Mary-Lou, I could feel your absolute preciousness from a child to an adult reading this today. Thank you.

  12. it doesn’t seem like rocket science – so why do we take so long to start truly honouring the communication of our bodies, even when the messages have been breaking through loud and clear. The rewards of supporting our body is the access to greater clarity, wisdom and understanding, as well as much greater ability to deal with all situations that come our way. So it is worth at least giving it a go to see!

  13. How often do we forgo our inner knowing, our absolute and all-knowing compass? And when we do, how often do we kick ourselves in the back side for it? – I can say from my life, many, many times have I done that.

  14. I often hear people complain that they were never given a road map on how to be in life. The truth however is that we have been given the gift of clairsentience which supports us to know exactly what is going on and how to deal with it. All that is required is that we listen to our body.

  15. I am really seeing the places I still over-ride my feelings by using my mind to make decisions that are against what I have felt. It all happens in an instant but the outplay from that choice can be incredibly harming.

  16. This alone shows how we need to change education and change this to True Education in supporting children to honour what they already know and what they feel rather than trying to teach what they ‘should’ know which takes them away from this innate and natural clairsentience.

  17. It’s amazing how we can fool ourselves that we are caring for and loving ourselves when in truth we are just going through the motions. It is impossible to take drugs and love ourselves at the same time…unless of course it is the emotional kind of love we are talking about, a love that panders to our wants and needs however harmful and abusing they might be to our body mind and spirit.

  18. True Mary-Lou we can come from knowledge but when we don’t live what we feel is true and build this quality in our day to day life, we will never get it and it will be an endless trap of trying to find more knowledge to satisfy our mind. Our body is full of wisdom and when we put this first before anything else in life our quality will determine what is there for us, living from inside out and not the usual other way around.

  19. Our clairsentience needs to be honoured and accepted as very ‘normal’ when we are young, somewhere along the way we separate from this inner wisdom and then we lose this connection to greater awareness and understanding that supports us through life.

  20. This was well needed for me to read today. This line – “The drug use was not what I wanted deep within me, but I always ended up going back to it.” – was a corker for me. No longer drugs for me but over eating, being hard on myself is something I keep going back to. I got from this today to deepen the love for myself, which I will work on, thank you.

  21. I love your honesty Mary-Lou in which you share how you portrayed yourself as a health fanatic all the while ironically in the background you were abusing your body with drugs. I have to say it’s really quite fascinating how our mind works to justify the contradictory choices we make.

  22. The only reason why we do not live the simplicity we had as children is because as adults we do not value our clairsentience.

  23. I think it is interesting to consider why we may ignore or override what our sixth sense is telling us, that sense we get to not do something or to do something that comes from deep inside without any justification…

  24. As a child we have a natural knowing of what is true and what is not, but as we go through life we allow ourselves to be influenced by other peoples opinions and start to doubt our own clairsentience. This is when we start to make choices that deep within we know go against what we feel but we choose to do it any way, so that we can fit in with what is seen as normal. What you show Mary-Lou is that it doesn’t matter what age we are when we start to make loving caring choices, we can begin to turn our life around by listening to our inner heart as we did as a child.

  25. This is such a perfect blog to explain the inner knowing we all have called clairsentience. I am sure everyone could relate to the knowing you had as a child and that the pull to be liked by our friends and family. Most of us have experiences from early on that lead us to believe that by not expressing what you actually feel, you will be more liked. All the while our like (love) for ourselves is being eroded by the constant dismissal of what we feel to be true.

  26. All we really need is to have this doorway, this window, opened so that we can be reminded of what is innate within us… And what is so natural… But then we have to go through the doorway.

  27. Clairsentience is something that is often presented as being wacky or only for ‘special’ people rather than the totally normal, natural thing that it is for all of us in my experience. I think blogs like this are great as they help us to recognise how much we are sensing energy all the time just that we may be dismissing what we’re picking up on, but that can change and we can re-develop our awareness of it.

  28. Looking back to my childhood, it is amazing how clear I felt about everything. There was an inner knowing that gradually got reduced and then decimated by a world determined to make me feel less than I was and of course I chose to go along with this, so I cannot blame anyone else.

  29. When we are thought form young to focus on our mind and dismiss what we feel, or worse that what we feel is wrong, then it is no wonder that we let go of this innate wisdom and are always looking for a reasoning, explanation or mental knowing as a confirmation before we dare to act on what we feel.

  30. Like bats in the night we are to feel our way through life relying on what we know the heart feels, over what the eyes and mind tell us is true. Our clairsentience is our radar. Without it we are lost in the darkness with nothing to guide us safely home.

    1. An excellent metaphor… If you have been in a colony of bats flying it’s uncanny how none of them hit you… They know exactly what to do… It is their nature, and so clairsentience is ours.

  31. I can feel what a huge impact the accidents you had as a child and teenager impacted your body when I read your description of it. Our bodies have to wear the consequences of our choices and it can simetimes be an even bigger ouch to realise we knew that that choice would hurt us all along.

    Love the way you have shared so openly, powerfully and sweetly here Mary-Lou.

  32. “I have only been able to come back to living from my knowing because I started to love myself – to really love myself, deeply. This is a work in progress, and I practise this every day, by continually making choices that are loving. This is what has made the difference.” Beautifully said Mary-Lou. I feel that I too am regaining my knowing little by little as I accept and appreciate all of me and love and cherish myself.

  33. I can remember a particular teacher not liking me and a teacher that did like me. I also remember at the time asking myself ‘how come? Why was one teacher very obviously not liking me and the other very obviously liking me?’ I put it down to at the time that the teacher that liked me knew my parents and the teacher that didn’t like me didn’t know my mum and dad!! How we can come up with mental explanations to avoid seeing what is really going on. On reflection the teacher that didn’t like me was jealous, fact and my clairsentience knew it but I didn’t want to see it especially the reflection of jealousy in a woman because it would bring hurts up from within to address and heal.

  34. We honour our innate clairsentience by living what we know to be true and not simply by thinking we know something is true because we are told it is so. Every child knows how to do this. Most adults have drifted from it.

  35. My body’s messages get louder and stronger the more I connect and honour my true feelings. ‘Expression is Everything’ (Serge Benhayon) – following the impulses of the body and expressing everything that offers.

  36. I love the instant response our body gives when we start honoring it. It doesn’t matter at what age we begin, the moment we treat the body with love and respect it simply appreciates that so much and it will communicate to us even louder what it needs.

  37. We have sat exams in overriding, we have certificates in blocking out and doctorates in ignoring what we feel. So it only makes sense, that it takes time and understanding to let go of these ways of being. The more we accept how they have seriously hurt us, the more we will say ‘no more for me’. Thank you Mary-Lou Reed.

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s