339 thoughts on “Breakdown or Breakthrough?”

1. We can make our issues bigger than they are or we can see them for what they are and take the opportunity to evolve.

2. Breakdowns give us the willingness to see the truth.

3. The healing can come more naturally when letting go of the need for perfection, as in ‘keeping it all together’ for whatever reason. We are sensitive human beings and this is worth celebrating not denying.

4. If we look at the ever increasing levels of suicide across the world, it seems clear that as a society we do not know how to truly deal with the challenges that we face in life – we are not raised or supported to have the tools to be able to work through our issues and express in a way that doesn’t bottle up the problems until the only solution that people feel is left is to take their own life. This is where blogs like this are so important because they show that there is another way to be.

   1. Tragic indeed that taking ones own life would be considered a solution. Without letting others in or letting ourselves be seen we keep the illusion going that we are separate, that what we do does not have an affect on all of us. It is our collective responsibility to support ourselves and ask for support when needed.

5. We are here to learn and at times things need to crack in order for the light to get in.

6. I have recently had the feeling of past periods of being low in my life despite the fact that life is better than it has ever been this time round – this shows me clearly that this is a clearing of the old feelings which have been buried.

7. Recently someone was sharing with me how they were close to a breakdown and had been to the GP. While they were sharing they were holding back tears that they clearly wanted to shed but held strong not wanting to feel vulnerable, which reminded me of how we think we need to be strong and not show how we are truly feeling, even though I had felt for some time this person not really coping. We see this kind of behaviour as a failure, but to me in that moment, it was a great point to be at for them because it had brought more honesty and we all need much more of that in our lives so we can start to heal.

8. I’ve recently been speaking to someone about an illness they have – and in this conversation, we spoke about the possibility of that illness being onset by an old pattern they were living. They agreed and saw that it is about their movements and breaking the cycle of abuse they have allowed for 20+ years. It is still their choice what they do next, but if what they do is break the pattern, then that is so healing for their bodies.

9. More often than not, when experiencing an illness or disease we would call success that which is the regaining of health and vitality, but what if success or true healing is the breakthrough in consciousness of that which has led the person to become ill in the first place and to be open to live more from the heart regardless of their time here on this plane of life.

10. I know when I have felt safe and encouraged to feel what I have buried in the way of hurts with practitioners of the Universal Medicine modalities it has been astonishing to feel how much I didn’t even realise that I had allowed to foster in my body. It is life changing when we truly allow such a healing to take place and I personally have felt physical alignments and my body feels so much lighter and freer because of it.

11. There has been a lot of emphasis in enduring difficult situations and being stoic and yet we miss the point sometimes that different responses are needed.

12. Our body is like a house, if we keep filling it up with junk and rubbish that doesn’t belong we will end up with many issues, one of them is the ability to walk from A to B, the flow is blocked for example by rubbish. So, similar to our body, if we accumulate excess of emotions, hurts and undealt with stuff, our body, mind and general health suffers. Often the state of our house is an indication of what is going on in our body.

13. I have found that the greatest growth comes when there is a breakdown of what is not working in my life. Without the breakdown, I wouldn’t be able to see it as I am like a hamster on the wheel, continually running to try to make it work. Managing life is not what we are here for and certainly a reduction of the love and joy we can be living. So, although its uncomfortable at the time, from the mess comes a new truer way of living.

14. ‘The letting go is the healing and a very necessary part of someone’s growth and development.’ – Indeed it is, if we are not willing to let go of that which is holding us back, whether it is physically, emotionally and/or mentally, there can in effect be no true change.

15. Such an important call to allow such conversations relating to depression which affects such a high proportion of the population at some point.

16. Our so-called breakdowns can be our greatest moments of change, often when we are in the mud very deep we really have to start to be honest with what we are doing in the mud and how amazing it would be to be out of the mud. In this realisation we can commit to getting out of the mud because we are now aware of being in it, if we are willing to be honest and take the next steps.

17. ‘Breakdowns’ give us a much needed stop moment to reflect on all our choices that has taken us to that point.

18. Illness and disease is a great example of how we have reduced human life to be only about the physical and in that missed the bigger energetic picture that is taking place.

19. One of the most obvious useful and practical ways to feel the letting go of the layers of protection is to keep letting go of the tightness in our face… It has a remarkable effect on our awareness, our energy, and our body

20. Our bodies are always on our side, calling us back to unity. What we often call a ‘breakdown’ in the body can in truth be a healing when it is understood from the whole.

    1. Very true Victoria. It’s important to appreciate that what is being ‘broken down’ is what is getting in the way of this undeniable unity. When this is the case, it is indeed a beautiful healing that is taking place.

21. This is a great point Amita – there is a significant difference between seeking healing and just relief.

22. Our bodies are so amazing and they know how to exactly work with us, their timing is so precise – simply divine.

23. ‘These emotions can feel like they are part of who we are, like being an angry or sad person, when in fact they are just an energy held in our bodies, the apparent difference between people only being how deeply embedded they’ve become.’ i is great to remember that emotional energy is not us, we are just letting something through that we have let in.

24. I know that my body responds physically to the way I live. My cycle for instance is a perfect example of what can happen if I choose to burry for a month. I usually get zero symptoms now with my period due to the way I live but if I have a month that I am emotional and I rush and I don’t take care of myself, my breasts will get sore leading up my period. Illness does not just appear out of thin air, it is there to communicate and clear out past choices.

25. “If we each committed to this process of reflection and healing and took responsibility for our reactions rather than looking to others, our lives and our relationships would transform in every way.” The more I confirm myself, the more I know myself and when people fling stuff my way about me that is not true I am able to read what is going on and not take it on and react. Appreciation and confirmation are key to building a strong foundation where ill energy cannot enter.

    1. Without appreciation we are left with self bashing, self critical harming thoughts.

26. We live life like cars running around a race track without taking moments to stop, so it is inevitable that our bodies eventually make us stop through illness and disease.

27. Allowing something to fall apart gives us the space to see and feel what we were invested in that kept us holding on to a broken picture. It is through this period of reflection that we are able to grow.

28. When making emotions personal to us (I am angry etc) we erroneously believe that this is who we are. Observing any emotion as being only an energy that is not who we are in truth, releases the attachment and stranglehold of this belief.
    “These emotions can feel like they are part of who we are, like being an angry or sad person, when in fact they are just an energy held in our bodies”

29. A beautiful understanding of the need for us to express all we are feeling and allow ourselves the space to simply be who we are. Being brought up to suppress all we feel is very sad and the straight jacket we put on ourselves but the freedom of breaking through and breaking down this is a real break through in our lives with ourselves and others allowing love back and the beauty of this everywhere is very powerful.

30. The devastating impact of pretence and keeping up appearances (something I exhausted and constricted myself with for years) and the release, honesty and openness that comes with letting go of this pattern, is really amazing to experience and for every time I do let go of something (a belief, opinion, need to be right, for example) I am blown away by the sense of liberation and realness.

31. Beautifully said Alison. Just recently I have started to see that there is no destination that will ever be enough, but it’s in the quality I move that the richness of this life lives. It’s not the where, what or why but all about the how. I haven’t been able to maintain it, but I got a great glimpse to see that putting the rubbish out or cleaning the sink can be as beautiful as a kiss. It’s all in the connection and depth we choose to bring.

    1. I can so relate to your comment Joseph, I feel the same and learning to appreciate the quality of what I do that matters and not the quantity or location.

32. It is our unresolved hurts that make us irrational and lead us to act in ways that harm ourselves and others. It makes absolute sense to feel and deal with these hurts in a way that clears them from our bodies. This then leaves us free to feel the natural joy that we have been all along.

33. The irony is we can think we are ‘putting a lid on it’ and keeping things functional, but it is in truth far from functioning well – as our bodies are taking a huge weight and strain while we try to look like all is OK.

34. Breakdowns are like the last straw that breaks the camels back, because the resistance to surrender to something just gets so intense that something has to blow. These times can be much needed to bring us back to a point of surrender where there is space to see clearly what is not true for us, but choosing to focus on it as being a bad thing and getting caught within the struggle to get back, can override any true understanding of what we are holding onto.

35. ‘But is there something very necessary, honest and real about going through an apparent breakdown that could actually be an opportunity for a breakthrough?’ I have been through a number of apparent breakdowns in my life and each of them has been profoundly healing once the choppy water has settled and I have been able to gain perspective on what was going on.

36. ‘Like a dead weight around our ankles we drag our unresolved hurts into every situation, reacting not to what’s right in front of us but to everything that has been thus far’ We get what we think is justifiably angry about situations either in our personal lives or in global situations, not recognising that the energetic impact of our emotions is spraying the world with negativity.

37. Any issue we experience comes from not expressing the love that we are, this hurts and when we let ourselves feel the hurt it comes up, hurts then leaves. Giving us another chance to express our love. Its awesome putting this into practice as I feel invigorated and inspired to go into the ‘hurtful situation’ again but with a chance to express rather than holding myself back. Knowing how much the holding back doesn’t work!

38. ‘We’re baffled by the sudden deaths of seemingly healthy, happy people dropping dead with strokes, heart attacks, aggressive cancers and the like, but could there be more than bad luck going on here?’ More than baffled I think we are plain confused and scared because we have bought into the all the ideals and beliefs of the current consciousness around health and education, in utter denial that we know they aren’t it! Somewhere deep inside we know our current set up isn’t working but because we have such an invested pride in making it all work the way it is we have been very closed to the truth and making life about love rather than function.

39. This is very true Alison …”The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life…”

40. ‘could our apparent breakdown actually be our body’s ultimate spring clean, shedding the layers of what doesn’t belong to make way for the new?’ – Speaking of experience I can testify that a breakdown is indeed the body’s ultimate spring clean, forced to happen by past pattern of overriding my body’s signals. For me the breakdown offered a true healing and an understanding of true self honouring.

41. If everyone had this understanding of breakdowns and such events in people’s lives then we would not be so quick to stereotype and label people and instead our communities would feel and be a lot more supportive to those things which can come up for us to deal with in life.

    1. We can be very quick to judge another whilst having absolutely no understanding of what they are going through, especially as so many of us walk through life with a smile saying that everything is OK when quite often it is not.

42. I can vouch for the “keeping it together” not working. All it does is build a brick fortress around ourselves, eventually making us sick.

43. There is something very interesting in considering that in something breaking down, we are given an opportunity. Often its hard to see at the time that this is the case, for a breakdown can be quite overwhelming. But we can see something in ourselves during these times that we don’t ordinarily see.

44. It feels a bit like when a volcano erupts, the pressure can build up so much that there appears to be a breakdown, but breaking through the understanding that the body supports us with illness to give us a break from the pressures of life we are subjecting ourselves to, can then be viewed in a very positive way.

45. Living behind thick, seemingly solid walls of protection is like embalming ourselves in layers of numbness so as to not to feel the deep hurts within. This creates more pain as we then feel a deep separation from our essence and others.
    “The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.

46. It is possible to approach illness and disease from a completely different vantage point – one that actually embraces the illness for what it is removing from the body. It is then that we no longer fight the illness and no longer fight ourselves – and the healing that takes place is immense.

    1. Another example of how letting go transforms our relationship with life.

47. Super blog. Emotions are toxic in our bodies and can feel really heavy and if we don’t release them the body finds a way to release them through sickness and illness, and so our breakdown is indeed a breakthrough and can be truly serving and healing us in so many ways if we can be honest about how we have been living.

48. “… could our apparent breakdown actually be our body’s ultimate spring clean, shedding the layers of what doesn’t belong to make way for the new?” This brings a whole new awareness to the purpose of illness and disease, that it is the body clearing something that does not belong inside it. Every disruption to our health is a message from the body that how we are living is not supporting it.

49. It’s true – the world is ‘obsessed with the pursuit of happiness’. But you cannot create happiness on top of a whole load of unresolved stuff. To connect to the joy in life we need to deal with the issues that are stopping us feeling that joy. If we don’t, we are likely to feel misery instead of joy. It’s well worth facing the challenges and issues that are right in front of us.

50. When we feel hard done by in life are we not missing a golden moment. When we stand still, nothing happens and when we only look at our past. The simple movement of looking forward will always leave mistakes in the past lessons we have learned from.

51. This really challenges the notion that the bad or challenging things that happen in our lives are really “bad”… or …. could they be a whole new introduction to a whole new way of living life?

52. Until it breaks, we do not question the structure that encloses us and keeps us imprisoned. There is great beauty in such a ‘break’ if we surrender to the healing on offer through this process.

53. What can appear like a cosmic dagger of attracting the same old situation time and time again is not a punishment from the universe but can be viewed as a helping hand to get us to look at what’s really going on so that we can resolve our hurts and make a different choice going forward”. This is a powerful teaching for humanity as often there are times we’d rather not look at our imperfections, however this is how we grow and evolve.

54. ‘Like a dead weight around our ankles we drag our unresolved hurts into every situation, reacting not to what’s right in front of us but to everything that has been thus far’ It is so easy to go through life with reaction after reaction and with no understanding of why situations keep repeating themselves, we feel that we are victims… until we are supported with the revelation that everything is as a result of our own choices, we are the creators of our world which is simply a reflection of all our choices. Then we can choose to explore the hurts and let them go. Amazingly, when we do that, the situation stops happening and that is because we no longer need the lesson.

55. Resilience is an interesting word. I have felt that there is something not quite right with it, but there is a strong movement that is asking us to all consider how we can be more resilient. We can say yes the world is not going to suddenly become gentler and more accepting of us, but to be resilient does seem like a mask that may bury how we feel and not address the issues that have made us feel in need of coping mechanism. If we focus on being more resilient though it seems to take the focus of us addressing how we have set up society/ our world. Toughness becomes the go to, where in actual fact we need more love and care in every aspect of life, the more we appreciate ourselves the less we need a counter to the world around us.

56. ‘Like the calm after the storm clouds have passed, there is a deep settlement in the body when someone allows themselves to feel and let go, like a sigh of relief – “finally I don’t have to carry this anymore!”

    I remember sitting on a bench on a clifftop by the sea after the storms have come, and the wind and seas battering the shores, have passed and there is an ease, a new beginning that feels so fresh and full; and this is how I feel after letting go of old patterns and emotions and hurts I’ve let rule and ruin me by trying to bury and ignore them. There’s then the space in which to breathe fully deep into my lungs, just like sitting on the cliff top breathing in the gentle sea breeze.

57. It is easy when things don’t go to plan, to panic, brace up or push for control. Yet recently I have been realising that there is a great deal of learning, healing and empowerment can come from opening up to flow, observe, understand and respond lovingly in such instances.

58. There is much wisdom that you have shared with us Alison, thank you. One particular nugget that stood out, is when you talked about we are not our emotions. Quite often you can hear people say, “I’m a sad/angry/frustrated/anxious person”, but what you share here is that we are not that, they are an emotion that is in us/coming up to feel but it is not what defines us. The key is not to identify with the emotion, but to see why you are having it, and to learn to let it go.

59. Yes, this makes sense to me Jane. Young children know this, it just gets covered over by well-meaning continuation of the imposition of ideals and beliefs from significant others that continues through life, unless another way is reflected – as Serge Benhayon lives.

60. It is true for me at least, that in the expectation to be a certain way, when there is a rough patch or I wake up feeling not so great or a but vulnerable, there is an instant worry – oh no what’s wrong with me! As if the one day in amongst the 10 or 20 amazing days is somehow of greater weight!

    1. This is very true Rebecca, we tend to nit-pick ourselves on the days we have a hiccup, rather than nurture even more lovingly.

    2. I agree Alison – tension need not be the unwanted guest – we can either focus on the tension that is often there that wants us to step down and away, or we can embrace with all of us the tension to be more, to step up and keep stepping up and expanding and this tension can become the pull back to living all of who we are.

61. When having emotions in our body, our ability to respond and see how things really are is reduced because the emotion wants us to play out the situation with the current that is in our body. From. It being taught how to truly handle emotions as children we live at the mercy of them and think we are them, but we are not.

62. Of the three people I have personally known who have suicided, all three were men. As a woman with a young Son, I get to see first-hand just how equally fragile and sensitive a male is and what a reflection he delivers to me each and every day to accept (and learn to live as) the sensitivity that I am too. Being sensitive is actually a great strength that beholds us when the times are tough or the tension is great. supporting us to deal with life.

    1. Absolutely Cherise. There is this false notion in the world that to be sensitive is a negative thing – a weakness. It is an incredible strength that we all have within us to discern our way through life in honour of what we have felt is true in any given situation.

63. Reflection has become a key tool to learning about life, what is going on and how to be. It is the impartial story teller, offering so much to learn from it’s similes, symbols and tailor-made allegories,

64. I like how this blog presents that a breakdown is actually something positive, rather than it being reaching the end, it is the beginning of the new, a releasing of what does not belong to us.

    1. I’ve experienced someone close to me have a breakdown and I had one myself earlier on in life. Seeing it as a breakthrough puts a whole different perspective on it, and with this view what a great place to start with the healing process.

65. Every challenge is an opportunity for growth. The harder it feels the more of an opportunity it is. Facing things that we find challenging helps us to deal with issues that need clearing, and dealing with them allows us a breakthrough into more freedom. There is something wonderful about facing a challenge. It feels scary but satisfying. Very different from the wishy-washy feeling of walking away from it. Commitment is the key.

66. Great blog Alison, I was so identified with my anger and hardness, I thought I was a hard, loud, self centred person and played these behaviours out for forty years. Since breaking down my layers of protection I am quite the opposite, I am a deeply sensitive, delicate women who loves and cares deeply for all humanity.

    1. Same here Mary-Louise, I too was very hard ( from all my layers of protection to shut the world out). My voice sounded hard and I rushed everywhere in a checked out state. Like you, since I have shed many layers of old skins (protection), I have discovered how sweet, delicate and precious I am and in that I can show my vulnerability and sensitivity which feels lovely to do so rather than hiding it.

    2. Same here Mary-Louise, all I knew was that I was hard ( the many layers of protection to keep the world out), and the sound of my voice was hard and I rushed everywhere in a checked-out state. Since shedding the layers of many old skins ( protections), I too have come to discover how sweet, delicate and precious I am and in that I can show my vulnerability and sensitivity which is a strength not a weakness.

67. Yes, Alison. If I consider how I have put my body on the line over so many years, it is no wonder that a process of ‘spring cleaning’ occurs periodically. So when I get sick or something brings me to a stop, I now see it as a golden opportunity to learn more about myself, and how I can be more loving with my movements.

68. This is very well explained how illness is a matter of unresolved emotions and as such you give already the key to heal or prevent them. Thank you.

69. When we connect to the immutable truth that everything in this 3 dimensional realm is impulsed by energy, including us, it provides us with the opportunity to see beyond the personal and understand how and why weird things happen. The more layers of protection we peel away, the easier it becomes to read the quality of energy behind impulse and alter our response or reaction to it. The more we deal with our hurts, the less the reactions pop up and the more we are to respond and grow, essential activities for our self-evolution.

70. Breakdowns strip the house of cards we so often build to protect us from the perceived hurts in the world. They are opportunity’s to discover our bleak, dark view of the world is just the dirty sunglasses we are wearing!

71. It’s quite staggering that more people are not breaking down given the state of the world, of relationships and of society at the moment. The getting through life seems to be the motto yet with that we always seem to miss out of feeling the vivaciousness that we did as kids.

72. ‘The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.’ as I was reading this I had a constant feeling of the meaning of the word breakdown meaning to take apart and identify the constituent parts of something. This allows us to see clearly what is there and identify anything that has been hidden within which can then be removed or worked on. We have attached a negative connotation on this word in that we breakdown like a car, broken and needing repair rather than an opportunity for significant learning and change.

73. The sooner we all start to realise that everything is because of energy the sooner we will get a grip on life in general and start developing true cures for disease, or by living from our bodies getting to a point, where through making true choices and being able to express all that we are, we can turn the tide on the runaway train of illness and disease.

74. “The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.”Absolutely agree wholeheartedly Alison. We are so identified by our layers of protection that we think this is who we are. It is bit like the band-aid thinking it is the skin.

    1. That’s a great analogy kathleenbaldwin because those layers stop us from feeling what would otherwise be so obvious.

75. There is much on offer in terms of healing when we choose to deal with our hurts and let go of old reactions which keep us cycling in old behaviours and interactions with others.

76. ‘could this lack of expression actually be holding us in a prison of suffering, when being vulnerable could be the key to emotional freedom?’ So many of us can feel shut out and it is ourselves holding back from our true expression.

77. ‘The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.’ The word that comes up is ‘surrender’, surrender to letting more love in and expressing more love out.

78. The subliminal message we always get in life is that what ever our next goal is that when it is achieved we will reach nirvana or be “happy” but as you say Alison to “not feel what’s really going on inside us makes us ill.” Reconnecting and feeling from to our inner-most starts the “healing,” which “then is about giving ourselves and others full permission to feel and let go without the imposing beliefs,” or ill messages that come from outside a True connection.

79. I was of the ‘fearlessly independent’ school. Seldom asking for help, or only when I absolutely needed it. Self sufficient in ways. But really all I was doing was not letting people in. We are meant to work together, to share and support one another, get to know and build quality relationships where we are honest with ourselves and others and one where we grow each other. There is no weakness in this at all and is the way to begin dismantling the walls of protection we have placed around ourselves.

80. So true Alison, we do need to encourage each other to speak up, to get things out, to share and, however clumsy we may be at the start, to express how we are feeling. It is medicine.

81. It has only been thanks to Universal Medicine that I have been able to see what would have in the past been massive breakdowns as possible opportunities to grow and evolve and it has totally transformed my life.

82. The body cannot help but discard what does not belong. And what does not belong is what is not of the divineness we are from.

83. What I’m discovering is it’s a re-learning what it is to surrender. We have live so long in a way that turns a blind eye to what we are feeling inside, and have become so comfortable with the way in which to cover theses feelings up. When we begin to surrender to all we are, we start to see the false way in which we have lived, and the layers we once were comfortable living become so uncomfortable we start to discard them.

84. Holding on to emotions is very harmful to the natural flow and harmony of the body. In time, beyond the mental state and initial physical changes that go with emotion, it will begin to affect the body and state of health much more obviously when not addressed and released.

85. Allowing a deeper connection and not continuing to ignore our feelings is an enormous breakthrough when for so long we have just hung on rather than become vulnerable. Vulnerability is the opening we need to begin the healing process.

86. We are not aware of all our stored baggage but the body sure is and it plays out in all aspects of life whether we are unaware of it or not. What a blessing the body knows how to clean it all out.

87. When we hit the bottom we are faced with the reality of where we are. When we are coasting, we can fool ourselves into thinking all is well.

    1. Yes and find so many distractions to fool ourselves that everything is fine. Eating smoking, drinking, countless activities so we don’t have time to stop and think, chasing sports teams, even working extra hard, oh, the list of distractions to fool oursleves is endless!

88. People can think that because something has past them and may have happened a long time ago, its done and dusted but the pain from that experience is still with us in our bodies when we are not honest and don’t deal with it. Men in particular can hold this, she’ll be right attitude, while still carrying deep unresolved feelings, or self judgement around something that happened in the past, all because of that tough exterior that they feel they have to uphold.

89. A great sharing Alison and thank you for the wakeup call. We all need to seek support when we first feel things are getting too much for us in this life.

90. Could it be “our apparent breakdown actually be our body’s ultimate spring clean, shedding the layers of what doesn’t belong to make way for the new? Bring on the “spring clean” for once the cleansing has finished our bodies feel rejuvenated. And our connection to our Soul has deepened.

91. Yes, Alison, holding onto an unresolved hurt creates tension in the body, which builds up and then leads to a breakdown, health condition or accident. Surely it is time for the medical world to acknowledge that our emotional state of being needs to be addressed, in order to heal the underlying cause of our ills.

    1. True Janet. And this would also highlight that superficial fixing of health issues and regaining function is neither the end of the story, nor a true healing.

92. Doing everything right and by the book does not deliver us health and wellbeing. We actually need to cultivate and nurture a relationship with the body in a way that only our body can teach us and not the from intellect.

    1. Yes the mind is not the holder of the truth, yet our body knows and communicates loud and clear to us if we are willing to listen.

       1. We do not gain an ounce of truth when we listen to our mind

93. Whilst having a breakdown could be our body’s ultimate spring clean and is healing when it comes, but it would prudent for us all to express and share well before getting to that stage.

94. I have been having several conversations recently about how we judge certain experiences as good or bad, but in many recent example, the people around me have felt that the bad ones actually were the best outcome, although they didn’t think so in the first instance. When we judge situations we can be closed to seeing the lessons or opportunities they present to us.

95. The suicide statistics are shocking and bring a stark reality to what is really going on with men these days, which highlights the fact that they are struggling. It makes sense that the burden of carrying all of the emotional baggage can eventually result in a breakdown, but unfortunately, we do not encourage our menfolk to speak up of the pain they hold inside.

96. When we make life about integrity, responsibility and energetic discernment, we will naturally experience joy, a steady quality that cannot be rocked. Simply pursuing happiness keeps us on a roller coaster of emotions that can never deliver a constant quality, just bob us around on the highs and lows of life.

97. We have already set ourselves up for the mess you describe by desiring to be happy. Happy is an emotion and will only perpetuate the unrest. The true quality of the Soul is Joy. Unimedpedia Joy provides some great quotes and free audio that expose the happy myth: http://www.unimedliving.com/unimedpedia/word-index/unimedpedia-joy.html

98. ‘Like the calm after the storm clouds have passed, there is a deep settlement in the body when someone allows themselves to feel and let go, like a sigh of relief – “finally I don’t have to carry this anymore!” I can relate to this. People carry emotional baggage for years unaware the path to healing is to let go not hold on to.

    1. Yes indeed kehinde2012, I can say I feel physically lighter as a result of letting go of emotional baggage I had been holding onto for many years. I have done it by having healing session and also the support of others together with making a commitment to myself to let go of the things that didn’t serve me.

99. A goal of ‘happiness’ is very short sighted as happiness does not deliver us from the tension we feel. Imagine if we could take a ‘happy pill’ that left us feeling happy no matter what was going on around us – war – murder – rape – cyber bullying … being happy despite all that? And if you don’t like a pill you could choose a sport a hobby a drug a drink a food a tv show to deliver that happy moment to you. Doesn’t sound fun or true to me. We are all connected and all we choose affects others. Joy is our true state of being and we will never feel true joy if we settle for happiness.

    1. Yes, being happy despite all there is in the world that is unloving and needs to be acknowledged and not ignored feels to me very false and unsustainable. Why? because we are all in this together and it is natural to feel the tension when some of us are experiencing abuse. So, for example, having a happy holiday next to refugees who’ve risk life and limb to get there feels at odd with this, even very dangerous as our ignoring our fellow man’s plight means we don’t stand up for love and say no to the abuses of the world as long as we are happy. Those who live joyfully and reflect this natural embrace of our innate responsibility inspires me greatly.

100. It is often when we are brought to our knees so to speak that we then become very real and honest… the question is – why do we let it get to this stage? Wouldn’t it be less complicated for everyone if we were open right from the beginning – like when we are children we are so transparent! There are no lies (generally) but an open honest account of how things are – life is so natural and simple.

101. When we hold onto something we naturally feel impulsed to share it creates a tension in our bodies, so when we finally find the courage or whatever it needs to express, there is a kind of settlement.

102. At times we are attempting to keep something together that doesn’t work and needs to fall by the way side in order to create the space for something of truth.

     1. So true Deborah – there when we are in force or trying to control life we can be blinded what we think we need to happen and not seeing the beauty that is being offered through another avenue or opportunity.

103. I have observed that at times it is the deepening of awareness and ability to engage with life that can lead to an increased level of sensitivity and honesty about what is going on. So the apparent ‘break down’ is actually our Soul’s way of inviting us to face those areas that we need to address, a chance to build, deepen or solidify a loving foundation.

     1. I concur Golnaz, and sometimes that might be what we feel is horrendous but it is what brings the greater level of service for everyone equally.

104. “Rather than trying to ‘put a lid on it’ and keep things appearingly functional, we should be encouraging one another to speak up and let the tears flow.” – a great reminder to not bottle things up!

105. Letting ourselves be seen is a scary process but it does feel so freeing!

     1. Yes Henrietta, beautiful beyond words to experience this feeling of freedom.

106. Sometimes a breakdown can be in the subtlest of ways, for example, a simple point of the day when, during a conversation I may feel very exposed about the defences which I have placed around myself to feel safe or protected. The shock of this, of how I have constructed a way of moving which is ultimately designed to shut down my heart and keep people out, leads me to a kind of mini breakdown because of the love that is there which really is not meant to be kept hidden. So the breakthrough becomes opening up again to love in and throughout myself and everyone I meet. learning that no matter what, there is always love and vibrancy to be expressed.

107. Well said Alison, when the amour is taken off the body is left to feel all it has lived and has not let go of. You could say the state of the body is truly felt. It pays well to live a life that has no amour, we would then expose and deal with life as it comes.

108. I love the notion that we are not our emotions but we simply have feelings. And the ability to observe and not take things personal is still very relevant in letting go of old hurts and patterns,

     1. Absolutely – are not our behaviours for we are in truth divine… we are a soul.

109. So much freedom when we simply be with what we feel rather than trying to control every thing.

     1. Spot on Vanessa. I have been experimenting with accepting what happens around me and it does feel freer.

110. Whether we like it or not, our hurts must be healed at some point.

111. I am so starting to appreciate how life happens in a way that offers me the opportunity for a breakthrough. Someone I meet, something happens and a familiar hurt I’ve kept buried pops up and says ‘hi, look at me again so I can no longer bother you.’ Most of my life I’ve spent trying to hide myself from the fact that I’m feeling hurt. The loving, healthy thing is to welcome them from out the shadows a the lengths I go to to hide them are so harmful; and the willingness to feel them and my part in creating them is so healing.

112. Though this was not the way I handled it at the time, there can’t be any judgement on breakdown, even from ourselves towards ourselves, just the call to look at life differently and an acknowledgement of what we have been aligning to.

113. It seems as if we live in a way where we build up so much tension and unexpressed things and stress and so our bodies need some sort of outlet. So it is possible that the actual ‘breakdown’ is not bad, but the sum of all the choices we have made leading up to this point.

114. To put a lid on what we feel is like living in a castle with thick walls and a moat so no one is allowed or able to come in. As you say Alison ‘The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.’ Lets break down the walls and cross the moat so we can become transparent and open for learning to live with our heart.

115. Lack of expression, certainly holds us constrained in the limitation of our own making.

116. Yes, Alison. It is so true what you say about dragging our unresolved hurts around with us, and so having a breakdown, illness or accident is a powerful healing, of what keeps us contracted and identified as a victim in life.

117. It is so common to keep on going no matter what is going on for us… and yet when we ask for support, it is often there in bucket-loads, and we wonder why we didnt ask earlier!

118. When we look at the word ‘break-down’, there is a break, usually of a momentum of choices that are harming. The breakdown is the turning point as there is nowhere else to run and escape what is being created.

119. Holding everything in can harm us but can also end up doing as much damage to those around us… we can choose to ignore this or we can express how it truly is for us, which often opens the floodgates for very real and open conversations.

120. Yes so true and after we wonder what all the ‘fuss’ was about…

121. “Without full acknowledgement of how much we’ve been affected by our past hurts and traumas, we can never truly move forward and embrace new experiences and relationships. ” – This is so true and the more we do it the better it feels inside the body and in our whole being; it affects all our relationships and all we do – how awesome by just addressing our hurts and starting the process of healing we can have the most beautiful relationship with our selves and others,

122. What you are saying Alison rings true to me, I carried ideals and beliefs and thought they were mine but I had actually taken these from my family and when after many years I discarded them I could feel the space that opened up in my body and I felt I could breathe again.

123. We do need to be able to lift the lid and open up and express, how else will people know what is really going on and I feel this is what builds true family.

124. This leads me to ponder the importance of how we consider what is happening in our lives. Is it a ‘breakdown’, or a ‘breakthrough’? The distinction between the two attitudes is perhaps an obvious one, the latter being so much more positive than the former. But there is something deeper here too. What is the energetic truth? If we reach a point in life where our body needs to make an adjustment or a correction, we can appreciate the fact and lovingly embrace the healing that is taking place. But if we label it as a ‘personal disaster’ there is resistance to what is perhaps a natural process and an ongoing thought process that keeps us in denial of what is truly going on. How important it is to understand and appreciate the truth of such an event in our lives.

125. Great point you make here Alison that the more we let go of the trying to control and manage life the more life flows and the better equipped we are to handle everything before us.

126. It needs to become ok or normal for us in society to admit that we are not coping or handling something for in that rawness and vulnerability we can actually heal what it is that is causing the issue.

     1. True – deep honesty is needed of us all and the willingness to admit that the accepted life for most is nowhere near what it could and need be.

127. The alarming rates of suicide and depression and anxiety in men in particular is showing us that ‘keeping it all together’ and ‘keeping up appearances’ is not working and we have to start talking more to each other with a greater level of honesty about how we are really feeling and what is going on for us.

128. The world needs more people sharing their vulnerability. If we open our eyes we can see how many people are struggling and living with anxiousness, medicating for it with so many things, not just drugs. If we show vulnerability it allows us to be less trapped in the idea that we should be able to cope with the intensity life throws at us without feeling its affects. Of course we can perhaps get to that state, but only if we are honest that life is not always easy and that we don’t need to be able to hold it all in.

129. Without a doubt breakdowns are the opportunities for breakthroughs as they make us stop and take stock. However the challenge is not to get lost in all the stresses that come with the breakdown but to keep connected to the bigger picture.

130. “Looking at little boys and girls it is abundantly clear that we are each equally sensitive and fragile, regardless of our gender.” Nurturing this fragility is the key to life, allowing our selves to honour and respect this immense sensitivity that informs us about the quality of life we are choosing to live. So often the disasters we experience arose from small incidental occurrences that if dealt are prevented from escalating out of control.

131. When we stay identified and caught in what has hurt us and let our emotions rule, we are giving free reign to toxicity to circulate in our body. whereas when we consider everything as a reflection and an opportunity to heal, we allow for more and more space within ourselves – and that space is filled with love.

132. “The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life” – very true Alison, being honest, being open allows intimacy to be at the core of all relating and relationships and it’s this that so makes life so satisfying and enriching.

     1. It’s ironic that when we hide away to protect ourselves, we often feel more afraid, because we’re less connected to people and more isolated. When we completely accept ourselves, there’s no need for protection because there’s nothing we’re trying to hide or protect. Could appreciating ourselves more, and deeply caring for and loving ourselves also be the key to dropping protection?

133. Learning to give yourself space and grace to go through the discarding of what is not true is so important.

     1. Gosh this is so true Rebecca and it is so important not to self-judge or self-criticise ourselves but to see everything as a learning.

134. Sometimes things come up for me and I need to release it, it might come up as a sadness or frustration, in the past I have tried to attach a story to these feelings, so my brain can understand what is happening. Lately I have been just feeling it and letting my body go, I have found it very supportive.

135. The breaking down of… “layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.” Layers of hardening up, toughening up, soldiering on, being independent, capable, resilient, etc all have the effect of shutting out the love and intimacy we all crave – that comes from within us to be shared with all, and therefore received from others too.

136. ‘Learning to cope, to be resilient and ‘keep it all together,’ are skills we’re taught to develop as children,’ I have recently been through a traumatic time dealing with some bad health news of a loved one and when people asked me how I was with it all, my response was along the lines of ‘holding it together’ meaning I was being stoic and not allowing myself to cry, not allowing myself to feel the devastation of what it could mean in the short or long term. Being honest and allowing my vulnerability would have been a more true expression.

137. I used to go into sympathy when I hear someone has been through a breakdown which was not very supportive. But what I realise now is, a breakdown is actually a blessing in a way because it is our body saying ‘enough is enough’ how we are running our body is not working. It gives the person an opportunity to stop its current momentum and an opportunity to choose a different way.

138. I have spent most of my life being very emotionally attached in all manner of ways and really thought that this was all there was to life, a constant roller coaster of highs and lows. However, learning to nominate what I am feeling and move on has brought an amazing level of freedom that keeps on expanding my ability to observe and understand many of the activities that caused the distress in the first place and consequently make different choices that deliver a much more stable foundation to life.

139. ‘The key to healing then is about giving ourselves and others full permission to feel and let go without the imposing beliefs of it not being ok to cry, or that we are too sensitive.’ So true Alison and it needs to start with children so that they do not shut down their feelings because of the reactions of the adults around them. Furthermore as adults we can also reflect our vulnerability so that they have role models of how to deal with uncomfortable feelings rather than trying to ignore them.

140. There is so much suppressed hurts the body can hold before it can no longer do so and then illness, disease or suicide results. Learning to be vulnerable to face, feel and resolve one’s hurts is the best medicine one can give oneself.

141. Being honest with ourselves about how we’re feeling inside is key for us to be able to process and heal emotions rather than bury them; it doesn’t have to be overwhelming, a big catharsis or what we would traditionally call a ‘breakdown’, but an awareness and understanding that we allow ourselves to have without any judgment.

     1. If we are honest along the way and don’t deny how we feel there perhaps is much less need for a ‘breakdown’. Feeling along the way offers a gentler way to be with ourselves and others as we live our everyday

142. “In a world obsessed with the pursuit of happiness – an ever-elusive destination we live in a constant search of, but never seem to arrive at …” – this is a very revealing sentence and shows us how so many of us can be caught up in the picture of a perfect world, wanting everything to look rosy and pink and lovely and not wanting to see the not so pretty parts. But what if life is not about everything being hunkey dorey? What if life is about seeing it for what it is – the awful parts, the not so nice parts, and also the parts that we know to be from the same truth that lies deep within each of us and it is simply about recognizing that which is from our essence and recognizing that which is not from our essence and choosing to bring as much as we possibly can from our essence itself? Now that makes a difference in perspective!

143. Thank you Alison for a great reminder of how important it is to not hoard our emotions, but to actually let them out with the intent to heal and keep our body clear – It is almost like doing a big garage clean out, which is often not fun to do, yet feels amazing! “The letting go is the healing and a very necessary part of someone’s growth and development. Without full acknowledgement of how much we’ve been affected by our past hurts and traumas, we can never truly move forward and embrace new experiences and relationships. The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.”

144. Nothing can truly be ‘swept under the carpet’, as it all eventually comes out.

     1. So true Vicky, there is no way we can hide what is actually going on, our body reveals everything eventually.

     2. It all comes to the surface, the body is a great marker for truth, and anything that is not truth will rise its ugly head – and so we can address it and heal or dwell in it so that our body will say even more…

145. “If we each committed to this process of reflection and healing and took responsibility for our reactions rather than looking to others, our lives and our relationships would transform in every way” This is spot on the money Alison, and testimony to so many I know in the Universal Medicine student body who have done and do exactly this. No perfection of course… but the willingness to take responsibility for our reactions and look more deeply at ourselves is key. As a foundation for good relationships, it is essential in my view.

     1. I totally agree Jenny and the guidance of Universal Medicine is without a doubt transformational in enabling one to do this.

        1. Yes, Universal Medicine is the first to teach true self-responsibility with no blame of self or others, with no self-critique or condemnation, but the ability to self-reflect knowing we have an essence that is intact regardless, as does every other person we might have our ‘issue’ with. This viewpoint, that who we are is intact, allows for a level of self-responsibility that is truly free-ing, allowing love, which is our essence and once claimed and known as who we are, to be what we offer to others in relationship.

        2. The viewpoint that at our core we are untarnished I had before I met Serge but the difference that Serge brings is the approach of how to re-connect and live the essence. All other approaches focus on the problems, issues, etc. to get to the essence, i.e. ‘from the outside in’. This achieves short-term solutions but keeps one trapped in the illusion of getting to the essence but never achieving the desired outcome. With Serge, however, what he presents is to, and how to, connect, and keep deepening that connection, to one’s essence and then that which is not of one’s essence falls away, i.e. ‘working from the inside out’. Then the ‘miracles’ happen.

146. Alison what you are describing is the understanding that our situation – whatever it is – is not hopeless and we are not victim but there are actually ways with dealing with our situation that work and work permanently. I agree.

     1. I agree too, and it is awesome to experience when we have had hurts, and true healing has occured by first taking our own responsibility, and I found when all that occured all of a sudden I was wondering where it all went as it simply had no energy anymore.

147. “What can appear like a cosmic dagger of attracting the same old situation time and time again is not a punishment from the universe but can be viewed as a helping hand to get us to look at what’s really going on” – This is a really stunning quote, wow. What if the universe was there to support our every move, showing us exactly what we need to see when we need to see it. And when we feel like it’s acting against us, what if we’re actually making movements against the flow of the universe and this is what’s creating the tension?

148. We are given zillions of signs and warnings before the big breakdown; God is constantly looking out for us, nudging us and supporting us. However, it is always our own free will as to whether we heed his calls and in the end our bodies may have to deliver a bigger message.

149. “…the key to letting people in…” It’s a much used expression, but when I actually consider it I realise that the very fact that it even exists shows how far we have strayed from both our true selves and also from true brotherhood. I’m going to really look at how much my protection keeps me from the world and from others.

150. Thanks for highlighting the disturbing rates of suicide for men as this is a problem worldwide and is something that needs more open discussion rather than ‘trying to put the lid on it’ and hoping it disappears.

151. “Rather than trying to ‘put a lid on it’ and keep things appearingly functional, we should be encouraging one another to speak up and let the tears flow. The letting go is the healing and a very necessary part of someone’s growth and development.” Absolutely. So much tension builds in the body when we do not speak up, and we can hold onto old hurts for years and even lifetimes which can, if left unexpressed eventually have devastating effects on our physical and/or mental health.

152. I agree Alison, we get into habits of compromise, where our choices, that we say wont hurt, slowly chip away at the body and its natural harmonious rhythm, until we end up with a breakdown or illness that makes us sit up and take stock.

153. The stiff upper lip is an ingrained part of our culture. Very few of us are comfortable showing our vulnerability. Its a shame, because underneath we are all tender, fragile and sensitive, and we are the most at ease when we can be that with ourselves and others. It follows then, that if we are walking around guarded, most of the time we are not at ease. No wonder then there is so much disharmony, illness and disease.

     1. Yes, learning to have the confidence to walk around less guarded gives us a much better choice how to live as we are more aware and much more able to receive love.

        1. Love your comment Christoph – and it is so true, the more we drop our protection and let people in, the more love we are able to receive, and even if we do encounter hurtful situtations, we are much more able to discern what they truly are and can move on much quicker.

154. ‘If we each committed to this process of reflection and healing and took responsibility for our reactions rather than looking to others, our lives and our relationships would transform in every way.’ I have found that when I look at each challenging situation and am open to asking myself how I contributed to it I naturally find that I can take responsibility for my part without getting caught up in feeling like a victim – much more empowering!

155. When we identify with our emotions – which are just reactions, we keep ourselves stuck in harming the body. The constant harm inevitably leads to the body showing us so, and possibly, left unabated, to the breakdown.

156. Thank you for sharing Alison the importance of being vulnerable. It seems we are not this so much of the time and we have developed a shield of protection to get us through, but on the other side of that is illness and disease. To be able to share how we truly feel is actually so healing for us all – because it is the deep truth we carry.

157. “could this lack of expression actually be holding us in a prison of suffering, when being vulnerable could be the key to emotional freedom?” thats a great point and one that I found to be spot on and true, whenever i try to ‘hold it all together’ i end up falling apart inside, change this and when I let myself be vulnerable and my body relaxes and anything is possible, the support is there and I don’t go on pretending things are fine.

158. There is a huge tension that builds up in the body when we feel one thing but say another. When i was a child, we were told not to speak up, and not say what we were feeling. I have felt the tension so much in my body in the past that it became my normal, a pressure that I thought was a part of my life forever. The relief felt of letting go of the hurts, the tension accrued and the not expressing what was in the body, is physically palpable when we break through this way of behaving.

     1. Great point Gill that so many of us have accepted tension as a normal, day to day experience. But when we look more closely at tension, we get to feel that it’s not normal – as in a natural way for our body to feel – but that we have normalised it. Tension is our body’s way of letting us know that there’s something going on around us, or the way we’re choosing to respond to a situation, that doesn’t feel great

159. I think this is a brilliant piece of writing Ali, so many great points. The behaviours that occur in a dysfunctional society are often band-aided with punishments but rarely do we address the type of societies that foster anger and the deep sadness that resides in so many from a reaction to a very unloving society we so errantly accept. And yet the answer to life resides in our own acceptance of self and understanding that the model of normality in life does not mean it is loving or what we should accept.

160. This is a very interesting take on breakdowns, as we have many of them in the world but it seems little of them have the breakthrough that you mention. What you describe is that with the breakdowns we have the chance to get rid of things (behaviours and habits) that are not serving us/are not longer needed, but we do not always take this opportunity but simply endure and maybe even fight and hold on to our old patterns or just transform them into a different flavour. So the simple advice to ‘let the tears flow’ is really really beautiful as it has us surrender to our body and stops the fighting, the push, the it has to be different, and opens us up to feel and see.

161. Sometimes, when we have resolutely refused to deal with our hurts and issues as they arise and they build like a bottle neck waiting for release. A breakdown is the breakthrough we need to let go of the pent up emotion that has had no outlet.

162. “But is there something very necessary, honest and real about going through an apparent breakdown that could actually be an opportunity for a breakthrough?”
     This is a great question Alison. It had me reflecting upon periods in my life that seemed to be like being stuck in a super thick-glue-like substance – feeling anxious, separated and ‘discombobulated’. The breakthrough would come with an awareness of mental ideals and beliefs that were binding and not serving or healing anything other than to stay stuck in the ‘glue’.

163. There is a beautiful rawness and honesty when we are going through a crisis or health scare that many people experience and can mean a richer quality of life in terms of the relationship with ourselves and others.

164. We are like a pressure cooker, and without a way to release the pressure we have created, something will have to give! It is easy to see why men have a higher suicide rate. We have from birth, moulded into something that has shunned tenderness and caring for hard and unfeeling. Does this explain why men also commit more violent exits? What happens to a tough piece of meat that has been in a pressure cooker for a long time and then has the pressure released, you get something that is now, once again that is very tender.

165. The understanding that not dealing with our emotions is the cause of a lot of tensions in relationships and can lead to illnesses and diseases down the track would be a break through in many area’s of our life. If we would understand that we do attract the same partners to have the same dynamic because of our not dealt with hurts this would totally change this area of our lives.

     1. So true, in the long term it hurts much, much more to not deal with our hurts than to take the lid off, have an honest and responsible look, perhaps a few tears and let them go. It is actually very liberating to deal with our hurts and imprisoning not to.

166. Beautiful Alison. Many times when I’ve felt at my worst have been followed by times where I feel wonderful and begin making positive changes in my life. It takes a lot of honesty to break down but when we choose to get up again we are stronger than ever.

167. The ‘pursuit of happiness’ sounds a very reasonable thing to be doing – but the pursuit of happiness is not happiness itself and it could be said that it is actually ‘unhappiness’. If we are pursuing happiness then we are not happy for why would we pursue it if we know we already have it? For me, the same is true of love. The pursuit of love is not love and our choice is around continuing to seek love…or to connect with and be love. Continuing the pursuit of love just keeps the illusion alive that love is outside of us, distant and aloof maybe – when in fact it is within us all.

168. It is true that the world feels obsessed with happiness as the ultimate achievement. What a consciousness breaker to reveal that it is not in fact the wholy grail! The fact that life can be lived in a joy not dependant on outside things or events is freeing and inspiring.

169. With the suicide rates as they are, especially in men, we need to be able to open up and take the lid off, not put one on and for it to be totally acceptable to express what is going on and how we feel.

     1. So many men are growing up unable to see that “it doesn’t have to be like this”. Everywhere they look they are told to do, to be more, to look this way, to act that way, to provide this, to wear that….amongst all of that, it takes true courage to stop and feel and be.

170. Breakdowns in themselves do not necessarily lead to breakthroughs: only when we open ourselves to honestly reflect on the learning offered does it become so. And when we do we are graced with true understanding and healing.

171. Breakdown is often considered to be a failing, whereas this article presents it as something much more profound: an offering from our soul to heal our body and be true to ourselves.

172. Thanks, Alison. I love the simple wisdom you have presented here – “the choice to not feel what’s really going on inside us makes us ill”. There is a very different way to regard illness and disease, to embrace everything that is being communicated to us by our body and listen intently so as to learn and evolve.

173. I am very thankful of the healing modalities Universal Medicine presents, especially Sacred Esoteric Healing as it supports me to look at life patterns which have loaded my life, to feel the heavyness of them and eventually to let them go.

174. All the predescribed ideals and beliefs we hold of how to behave in life when we enter a hurtful situation does hold us away from truly feeling what these hurts mean to us and have a basis from to look into our lives.

175. and too susan, in these moments of crisis there is always a choice to make. We either ‘break down and surrender to that what is so strongly coming to the surface or we choose to not surrender but bury the hurt deeper within and move on with living our ‘normal’ life.

176. “If we each committed to this process of reflection and healing and took responsibility for our reactions rather than looking to others, our lives and our relationships would transform in every way.” That is so true Alison and it shows that responsibility is something we should become more use to in our daily lives.

177. After reading this blog for the second time, I couldn’t help but think of how butterflies emerge from a chrysalis after a period of their former caterpillar’s body being broken down into its constituent building blocks of matter and reforming through some amazing magic of Nature/God. It may sound kind of corny, but perhaps their is something to learn from that as we can let go of our individuality, allow ourselves to show our true feelings, even if it means a bit of a meltdown at times, and call out what the deeper hurts are to heal and transform into a new being without those emotional energies controlling our way.

178. Allowing ourselves to feel vulnerable is key to our own healing, we build hard walls of protection and keep people out but our expression and openness are what is truly needed to inspire good mental health.

     1. I agree vulnerability is such an under-rated quality in human beings and one that I am learning to allow in my life more and more which has supported my health immensely.

179. Anything that asks us to be anything other than the Divine Being we are is asking us to choose illness and disease. Our boys hold the same senitivity and fragility as our girls and the world is in desperate need of this. No wonder suicide rates for men have escalated as the push to deny their exquisite continues. We can change this by the way we interact with our boys and by openly celebrating their tenderness as it is expressed.

180. This is a great blog describing how one may look and and therefore respond to a ‘life crisis’ such when things don’t unfold the way they were expected. Depending on one’s viewpoint, it can be either a situation that one can choose blaming others or everything else around them, or a great pull-up of responsibility to see what more has gone on when one finds themselves in the disagreeable consequence of a situation.

181. Sometimes we may wait to hit our lowest point before we are actually willing to look at our hurts and heal them. But it does not have to be this way – we can make a choice to look at them before it gets that bad, and hence in this it is about the willingness to go there even though it hurts.

     1. Very true, Henrietta, we don’t have to wait for a big storm to pass through to see and feel the tension in the air or in our bodies.

182. Opening up and letting people in is definitely a key to our own evolution and those around us. The ripple effect of being open to Love by opening our heart will be a blessing that allows the appreciation, which is a great contributor to our evolution.

183. Wow Abby, I love what you have shared here – breaking down protection does take time and I had not thought about the fact that it also takes time to build, but this totally makes sense!

184. There is a strength in letting ourselves be honest about how we feel, and not hiding it, and hence allowing it all to be seen by those around us. It is often in those moments when we try to ‘hold everything in’ that we end up doing more damage to ourselves, rather than being open and calling for support when we truly need it!

185. Wow Alison this article has laid out a way forward out of the quagmire and into the light. Beautifully expressed and delivered without missing a beat. One to re read and refer others to as it speaks to everyone in everyday language that cannot but evolve the reader.

186. Sometimes I wake up and the first thing I feel is the awareness that I have received which has not been expressed. This is a constant reminder that what is there to be expressed is not for me and the moment I hold it back I have made it personal.

187. The fact that seemingly healthy, happy people can unexpectedly die with strokes, heart attacks, aggressive cancers and the likes very much suggests that there is far more to consider when we look towards true health and well-being. There is evidently far more at play than we currently give credit to.

188. When we let our vulnerability speak its amazing that this level of honesty then allows for more intimacy within our connections. Vulnerability is a true super power and one to be honoured and appreciated for the strength it offers.

189. ‘Rather than trying to ‘put a lid on it’ and keep things appearingly functional, we should be encouraging one another to speak up and let the tears flow.’ – giving ourselves and each other permission to open up and not bottle things up and in is so fundamental and deeply beautiful, because it is through this vulnerable process that we come to know the essence we are within and share this with everyone else.

190. This is what I have experienced Elizabeth and this is why it never works when we hold back expressing and being love, or wait for others to be love first. We ultimately hold the key to a loving life, no one else holds that for us.

191. When we break down our protection and live a love filled life, we get to see so clearly it is our choice to protect ourselves or react to others that hurt us the most. When we let go of the different layers/forms of protection, love is present even in the most unloving situations because we can chose to reflect love even when others are not.

192. I am still learning to no longer ‘put a lid’ on emotions that come up and feel the consequences when I do continue to do this.

193. ‘Rather than trying to ‘put a lid on it’ and keep things appearingly functional, we should be encouraging one another to speak up’ Supporting each other in our expression – there is no right or wrong.

194. The keeping up of appearances is probably our chief skill these days in life. But like the proverbial saying of ‘painting lipstick on a pig’ we are wasting our time beautifying something that’s not right. We grade ourselves and others we know on the use of make up – all without questioning whether any of it’s true. It’s uncomfortable as you show Alison to feel raw, unorganised, out of rhythm or just plain in pain, but it’s time we understood this a natural part of expanding rather than a sad mistake.

     1. Nothing wrong with pigs but for sure it does not suit them to wear lipstick any more than it suits us to be anything other than who we truly are.

195. Definitely a great piece of advice ‘let the tears flow’ keeping a lid on it just causes so many problems later on, it never stays hidden!

196. I never quite understood how healthy people get sick – especially really fit people who didn’t smoke or drink. I didn’t understand because I was missing a key ingredient, which is energy and how everything we do and express that is not inline with our true and divine self is having an impact on the body which it needs to clear. Suddenly, everything now makes sense.

197. I love this part ‘Like the calm after the storm clouds have passed, there is a deep settlement in the body when someone allows themselves to feel and let go, like a sigh of relief – “finally I don’t have to carry this anymore!”’ I recently was able to see and let go of a very old hurt. As I was understanding it I made a record of what I felt at the time, how it has impacted me and my understanding of these events from where I stand today. I re-listened to myself and felt how my voice became more powerful. I shared the recording with my husband and these were events that have happened in my life which he had not heard about before. I felt great and lighter by the whole process and being able to share with him felt like what you have described of not needing to carry that anymore. Profound and inspiring.

198. Why have so many of us given in to trying to seem OK or look OK or act like we are doing well while we continue to neglect dealing with what does not feel right inside us, in our lives, in our relationships and in the world?

     I know the first step to healing what does not feel whole or true in ourselves is to stop pretending “it’s all OK’ or mostly OK and stop settling for ‘good enough. We need to start by allowing ourselves to feel and face what is going on so we can get the to the self-honesty we need which begins to push out all the stuff that we know we don’t want. As we let go we make room to find and learn a new way to go forward.

199. Surprisingly the first thought that came in respect to “encouraging one another to speak up and let the tears flow” is that the whole society will be filled with emotional people crying and whimpering all the time and not being able to rely on anyone to do anything! How conditioned can our thinking become.
     The truth is that this is not what will actually happen, at least not long term. What this is offered is the understanding and support during those break-through moments.

200. Sometimes everything has to fall apart so it can reform in a more true way – if we can hold steady as it breaks down and focus on the building a new solid foundation, unafraid of leaving behind what we might have wanted or needed or attached to.

201. I agree, ‘trying to ‘put a lid on it’ and keep things appearingly functional, we should be encouraging one another to speak up and let the tears flow.’ Talking about how we are feeling, nominating what hurts us is very supportive. When I look into the eyes of someone who shares, they definitely look brighter afterwards. I know I feel completely different… ‘taking the weight’ of our shoulders does ring true.

202. A much needed blog thankyou, changing the way we look at adverse events in our life.

203. ‘… illness and disease – the Soul’s way of clearing out our unresolved baggage.’ I just love this understanding of life and the very beautiful possibility that something we have come to regard as a major disaster is in truth supporting us to heal. This really helps me to see and appreciate the so very loving nature of our Universe.

204. Absolutely. Letting go frees our body and creates space for the love that we are to just be there. And with this we can then choose to express from our true light, playfulness, joy and brotherhood.

205. A truly beautiful blog Alison. Thank you for taking the time to write and share it. Yes letting go, moving forward and embracing are so important to us living a truly love filled life. We can isolate and control our space so it appeases things are ok at times but then when we interact with others all that which was suppressed gets triggered for us to deal with. Embracing life, embracing situations and bringing our true quality to this is all part of healing and evolving.

206. This paragraph Alison is actually the awareness and understanding that if society took onboard fully – it would be the answer to all our woes and an acceleration to our evolution. A long but worthy copy and paste.
     ‘As everything is energy in this world, our emotions – much like electricity – are also pure energy, just differing qualities of it. We tend to think we can just brush them aside and move on, but these feelings like frustration, anger, grief and sadness have to go somewhere, and that somewhere is in the deeper layers of our body where they are held until such point that the tension becomes too great. Enter illness and disease – the Soul’s way of clearing out our unresolved baggage.’

207. A fabulous blog and question ‘could this lack of expression actually be holding us in a prison of suffering, when being vulnerable could be the key to emotional freedom?’ in schools I observe many programs trying to teach children resilience and I’m always left asking – ‘but when do they get to express what is really going on for them ?’

208. I love what you say here, Alison, about seeing challenging times as an opportunity to clear old patterns and hurts once and for all, rather than as a cosmic dagger punishing us, keeping us in a victim mentality.

209. ‘The choice not to feel what’s really going on inside makes us ill.’ So well put. Burying our feelings is not a solution to dealing with them, but storing them up to be dealt with by the body later, through illness and disease. We can’t avoid the consequences of our choices, a fact that our bodies so lovingly communicate with us all of the time.

210. There has been a lot of shame around having a breakdown and now there is a also a dismissiveness as though it is not something we want to talk about. I agree a break down is a potential break through. The body, physical, mental and spiritual has reached breaking point and can no longer function in the way it has been. Everything is saying stop. With the stop we have an opportunity to release and make way for a greater awareness, allowing us to see what changes could be made to start anew. The quality of support that we choose at these times will contribute to the new foundation that we build for ourselves.

211. It does feel freeing to have a breakdown at times, I have felt that sense of relief as a huge weight drops off me. We break down the beliefs and ideas and hurts that wrap around us like a suit of armour, leaving us hard and protected. The more I get out my hurts the lighter I feel without those weights.

212. The hardest lessons we learn in life are always the most valuable ones. When we experience a trauma or come upon hard times, there is always an opportunity to see it as a catalyst for change. Ultimatley the choice to change is up to us.

213. Beautiful Alison, what you’ve shared makes perfect sense to the heaviness most of us carry ourselves in throughout life. The light, joyful and playful steps of small children is something we need to use as a marker for how it is we can be throughout our whole lives. Dealing with emotions and things that have affected us in the past and letting go as you say, is key in being able to restore this lightness of being we all have at our core.

214. True Alison; to move on from or initiate a different way of addressing something requires us to voice what’s going on, creating a platform to move forward from. Burying issues or feelings, although often an easier solution, does not create a clean slate but can actually magnify the negative effects of it, such as how it affects our relationships.

215. Great question: ‘could our apparent breakdown actually be our body’s ultimate spring clean, shedding the layers of what doesn’t belong to make way for the new?’ We are fed such negative perceptions about having a breakdown whereas we can choose to see it as an opportunity to re-evaluate and clear out what is not supporting us to allow space to become more truly ourselves.

216. Very beautiful blog Alison. Shows that reaction to the current state of the world is all part of the ill that constitutes it at this present time. Seeing it as a cleansing and a necessary healing process changes ones perception on it entirely

217. A brilliant sharing Alison of the necessity to let go of everything we are carrying and the true benefit of this. Realising the harm of our emotions is something I am learning more and more and where emotions come from and that they are not really me. The real breakthrough of letting go and allowing is very necessary in our lives allowing a freeing to be and live who we really are. Beautiful ” The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.”

218. Thanks Alison, it’s essential we get to the bottom of this illness and disease which is now in every corner and pocket of this world.

219. ‘Like a dead weight around our ankles we drag our unresolved hurts into every situation, reacting not to what’s right in front of us but to everything that has been thus far – all the moments we’ve felt abused, abandoned, neglected, invisible and unsupported.’ I have definitely experienced this – sometimes I am reacting before I realise what’s happened, but as soon as I reflect it is easy to see what the underlying hurt is/was and then it is easy to let go and there is no longer a reaction.

220. What a belief dismantling sharing this is Alison. For as long as I can remember the word ‘breakdown’ had connotations of a failure and the inability to not be able to deal with what life is presenting us with. But to look at what is unfolding for the person as “our body’s ultimate spring clean, shedding the layers of what doesn’t belong to make way for the new”, not in any way a failure but a priceless opportunity to heal, is so very refreshing and potentially life-changing.

221. We are so pressured to put on a brave face, if I was to go to the shops feeling vulnerable and maybe cry in public people will react in many ways, some will be kind, others will avoid the situation, and others will judge an emotional person as mentally unstable. That style of judgement shows how much we have locked down our humanness – our ability to just be with what we feel, accept and express it.

222. A very great and simple start, to not turn a blind eye where things are so obviously not right and where we are all struggling. We have made life so complicated but in fact it is very simple if we but start with the awareness we have and put it to action.

     1. Great point Esther. Whilst reading your comment I felt how important it is for everyone to share experiences of breakdowns and breakthroughs so others can be inspired by them.

223. I love your very vivid and tangible descriptions of what is going on.

224. Alison the amount of hurts that we all carry can be huge, how we deal with those hurts, the support we have and the way we look at them. For me this meant a crisis point of what is the purpose of life, what am I doing and the only true answers that I found came from Universal Medicine and the support provided. A breakdown and letting go of those hurts is in my view a true breakthrough.

225. This is beautiful Alison. There is so much love and acceptance in this blog. Putting a lid on it in order to function does not allow us to bring all the true gifts we have to offer, and these are only available if we let go of the old baggage that is sitting in us from the past.

     1. Yes so much acceptance and willingness to heal. Very beautiful and although a short piece of writing it could be the cornerstone for others to be inspired by to truly change their lives.

226. Universal Medicine has supported me to see that my anger, frustration, sadness etc are not actually me, they are not what moulds and make me, they are the culmination of my unexpressed awareness & that if i commit to moving and verbalising what i feel when i feel it, then my body feels lighter, less burdened and I can feel the pull to stand up for what feels true.

227. Having been told to ‘keep a lid on it’ as a young person – ‘we don’t wear our hearts on our sleeve in this family’ – I can so relate to your line ” The letting go is the healing and a very necessary part of someone’s growth and development.” Until we do this we are carting around old and unnecessary baggage throughout our life.

228. Unexpressed emotions are poison in our body and if not cleared the body then has to deal with them. Illness and disease is simply the body’s way go getting rid of what is not natural or loving for the body. We have to start assuming responsibility for the choices we are making and the diseases/ illnesses we are experiencing.

229. “could our apparent breakdown actually be our body’s ultimate spring clean, shedding the layers of what doesn’t belong to make way for the new?” What can seem tragic at the time can open new doors – new possibilities – in the long run. I can vouch for this.

230. Realising that our emotions are not actually us but an energy that is so attached, or ’embedded’ in us, that we come to believe that they are changes our whole outlook to life. To then extricate oneself from their enthralment is like pulling oneself out of a quagmire, which can be very challenging but oh so liberating.

231. Becoming aware of these harming emotions that may be held in the body is the first step to being free of them.

232. When we begin to understand the true nature of energy and how it underpins our emotions, thoughts and actions, we can begin to decipher our real selves amidst our emotional turmoil. It is a life changing revelation and one that has the potential to free us from our self-made emotional prisons.

233. I got dumped by a girl friend in my twenties and really played down how hurt I really was and coped by drinking lots of alcohol and brushing those feelings under the carpet. It wasn’t till, I think it was last year during a healing course that it came up and I felt the hurt, and let it go so that energy is no longer in my body. How many of us carry stuff around weighing us down when it is totally unnecessary to do so.

     1. And how many of us carry around hurts we’re not even aware of, until they surface, years later? Our relationships with ourselves and all others would be very different if we committed to dealing with those hurt feelings, because, left undealt with, they manifest as not-so-helpful behaviours that sometimes play out on the subtlest level – yet they’re still there.

234. In London, we have buses that run on Hydrogen to help in reducing air pollution. The only thing created as a by-product of this energy source is water. Now, when we look at what high grade melted dinosaurs, better known as Diesel, what its by-products do to us is well known. Our bodies are amazing and will run on almost any kind of fuel, the choice is always ours, even when we know the consequences of the wear and tear it causes to our vehicle of expression and the world we live in!

235. The statistics for male suicides in Australia are alarming. It makes sense to attribute a large part of this to how boys are raised, encouraged as they are to ‘man up’, ‘not cry’, ‘not be a baby’ or called ‘sissy’ in many families. Boys and girls are equally gentle, fragile, vulnerable and should be supported to embrace this, talk about how they feel and understand that to do so is a strength not weakness.

236. To consider the possibility that living with unresolved emotions are tied up in illness and diseases does make sense especially as you can’t help but notice or feel how disharmony affects human movement, behaviour, and choices.

237. To feel our life falling apart is a very good place to be in. It’s the very point we should stop fighting and let it happen, let it all out.. As you say Alison, holding back the tears is not the answer. Connecting to deeply held feelings and sharing them with a supportive other, drops the protective guard and opens the floodgates. When this happened to me a few years ago, I felt a deep sense of relief, connected to the true me and began to breathe again.To share how we are truly feeling with another is an important step back to healing.

238. When we can let go of the emotional hurt and allow ourselves to feel the root of this hurt, we are on our way back to who we naturally are. And in that allowing oneself to be vulnerable in any situation, we are able to see and feel any abuse we experience in life and can observe it for what it is and will not absorb it and put it away as something we do not want to deal with.

239. Reading your chapter I got more aware how superficial and trapped in patterns of control,and protection we often are in our relationships. So seldom there is the person directly is open to show her true self but there are layers of protection corresponding and interacting with each other.
     This is sad and needs humbleness to get honest about.

240. I had the feeling that resilience wasn’t it but never quite the understanding of why. To be vulnerable is not a weakness but a way of connecting more closely to how we feel and let go of harming emotions that in resilience get trapped in our bodies.

241. Healing takes many forms and true healing is releasing the ill energies that kept us from living the Love we are! So could it be we need to be Love and see everything else that is less than Love as an ill? Then we can be Love “so that we can resolve our hurts and make a different choice going forward.” Looking for replacements at best fills the gap but never gets to the root cause so seeing things as being love-less starts the healing thus opening us up to True Love and healing that will nurture the body. This is great Alison, and by allowing us to be “encouraging one another to speak up” develops a trust so that our sharing reveals how we have been open to living less than Love.

242. A beautiful sharing Alison and very relatable to how I have dealt with things in the past.. I have started to listen to myself more and when I do how different the outcome is.

243. Letting go of something creates space…to see…and what is seen can be understood.. and what is understood can be embraced.

244. If we have created a momentum based on a series of movements that have taken us away from our true self (Soul) then it is inevitable that, no matter how much we delay, there will come a time where we have to face all that we have put in place that imprisons us and finally make the choice to renounce it so we can once again move unencumbered by all that prevents us from moving true to the love that we are.

245. ‘…illness and disease – the Soul’s way of clearing out our unresolved baggage.’

     Beautifully put, Alison, simple and succinct. And it doesn’t mean illness and disease can’t be scary – for some of it surely is at the purely human and medical level – but it does allow us to bring a big picture understanding to the table.

246. Keeping the deck of cards stacked high is exhausting and takes so much focusing of attention that actually letting them all fall down and discovering I’m still intact at the end of it is actually a wonderful letting go of what wasn’t true and being more honest so I can build a true foundation from which to grow.

247. When you consider it … everyone meets those protections and hurts we carry so they do not in fact get us in the essence of us – they get the version because of what’s happened in our lives and it has nothing to do with them these hurts we carry … we deplete who we are in living in this way and the key to letting go is with us being willing to address those hurts … why would we not want to be all of us with each person we meet and with ourselves?

248. Thank you Alison. I agree, it is in the breakdowns that I have alway experienced the greatest levels of honesty which have in turn allowed me to see clearly what energy I have been running my body with, which then gives me the opportunity to make changes to how I respond to life. So the breakdowns are perhaps our gifts for truth to come back and be a greater part of life.

249. Apparently healthy people may only look healthy on the surface. I often hear something in people’s voice or see it in their movement or how they feel overall and I get the feeling that something can be quite wrong even though the body still is considered healthy.

250. Often it is an event of massive proportions that stops us in our tracks and provides us with the opportunity… but as I have become more sensitive and learnt to listen to my feelings here and now, so I have developed so many more opportunities to feel what is hurting me, and what the right choice is.

251. Isn’t it amazing how we learn to ‘cope’ with life while not really being allowed to live who we are? It’s like telling ourselves never to put our foot wrong while not even knowing how to walk in the first place.

252. Makes perfect sense. Bottling up all our stuff is a classic ‘what not to do’, yet is basically what we’re taught to do even though perhaps not directly. Ultimately, it’s ‘suck it up, and move on’. But, we don’t move on when we don’t deal with what’s in front of us, and the knock on effect is so much greater than society really wants to see.

253. So true, in the hardening we lock ourselves away further, however, when we open up and express our vulnerabilities we give ourselves permission to let it go.

254. This turns the general perception of breakdown upside down. A breakdown is not usually seen as a ‘good’ thing, but if it is seen as a breaking down of our layers of protection to enable us to heal our deepest hurts and live free of constraint and control, this to me is a cause for celebration.

255. The number of suicides in Australia in 2015 is staggering; it equates to something like eight people taking their own life every single day of the year, on average. Multiply that by the number of people who are directly and indirectly affected and it is clear that this is a topic that concerns us all.

256. Thank you Alison and so true. We invest a great deal of energy in shielding our most powerful quality, our vulnerability. When we finally begin to dismantle the layers of armour we have applied to our bodies in order to protect this precious gift it is a huge relief. The more open and honest we are about what we are feeling and experiencing, the more we enable our selves and one another to process and deal with all the tensions in life without causing our bodies undue stress.

257. Reading this has reminded me of something similar with someone who is very gentle, loving and kind, and recovering from a breakdown. When there are so many things unsaid and emotions held onto in these situations it is not surprising that something has to give.

258. A wise woman once said to me – ‘the only real protection is our Love.’ When I heard these words and felt the undeniable truth of them I melted into myself. It was like I was being given the warmest most delicious hug from this Love within me that I had dismissed and forgotten about until that point. Those words activated the resolution in me to remember this Love again and to live it… and letting go of all the hard walls I would carry has been a journey of amazing surrender back to my soul. Better than any holiday journey or trip one could imagine… the ticket back home to our soul is the most amazing trip we can ever take.

259. It is very supportive to reflect on our day, to appreciate the good stuff and with out judgment, critique the not so good stuff. Then we can learn from our mistakes and make a different choice the next time around

260. ‘Rather than trying to ‘put a lid on it’ and keep things appearingly functional, we should be encouraging one another to speak up and let the tears flow.’ Yep I so agree and be honest about what we are feeling. Burying and denial get us nowhere and takes an illness or dis-ease to clear it.

261. Great article that puts the spin on what a ‘breakdown’ is and could be. I remember points thinking I was having or going to have a ‘breakdown’. It was like the pressure was to great and you just had to let go before you broke. I had allowed the world to be on top of me and the only way out was to walk myself out and choose to live another way. I tried living the opposite which only bought about the same feeling but just looked different and then it all came back to truly feeling and letting go, feeling and letting go. It was like that everything I had felt I was holding onto and this built the pressure. We are always feeling and so it would make sense to keep being aware of what you are feeling and appreciating what this brings.

262. Brilliant blog Alison, you’ve shared so many key points that supports us to let go, heal and be love. Being vulnerable and allowing our sensitivity through is actually so important. I find when I’ve had a good cry from letting go of a hurt, I feel much lighter and more connected to myself. Holding onto hurts just hurt us more.

263. I went through a very stressful period in my life and it culminated to a point where I took six weeks off to recover from that. My body literally said no more and I had to stop. It was not a full on breakdown but it was in that camp. It was the best thing that ever happened to me because I was forced to stop, take time off and rest, and in time heal the hurts that led to that spot. I also learnt some important life lessons (albeit the hard way!).

264. These emotions can feel like they are part of who we are, like being an angry or sad person, when in fact they are just an energy held in our bodies, the apparent difference between people only being how deeply embedded they’ve become. I used to think the emotions that I constantly had were me and that I was just weak and couldn’t change that, until I went to Universal Medicine presentations and courses and met Serge. It makes so much sense that we are not those things because they are not with us all the time, only when we feel less in some way, and then these things spring up from those places where they have been nicely tucked away by us.

265. A beautiful invitation Alison – to give our selves permission to be the tender beings we innately are. What a world of difference this makes to how we respond to and with the world around us.

266. Alison this is gorgeous. Lately I have allowed myself to feel more vulnerable and at first I thought there was something wrong with me, but when I allowed myself to simply feel what was there and not toughen up, it felt glorious. It is only our hard shell that breaks down and not us. We are ever steady even when feeling it all. When we drop the protection the adjustment can feel like a break down.

     1. I found that if I label it as vulnerable I will have a strong urge to protect myself but if I note it as being fragile and very aware, it is much more harmonious even though it has the same starting point.

     2. Interesting point you have shared here Nikki Mckee. By just allowing ourselves to feel this and nothing else in a step in the direction of feeling truly what is going on as this blog so powerfully shares.

     3. Nikki I had the same reaction but unfortunately went back into old patterns of using food not to feel. I’m glad to hear gloriousness awaits once I learn to crack this particular nut!

        1. For me all I had to do was be willing to go there. It is far more glorious than a bloated belly!

267. I used to think that my emotions were who I was and it was quite a revelation to realise that they are not. Once we understand this it frees us up in our relationships as well because we then don’t spend so much time reacting to others emotions and can see the essence of the person rather than the emotional hurt that they carry.

     1. Very true Elizabeth – I used to think the same, and it’s exactly as you have shared here. It is a freedom like no other to realise that who we truly are is pristine and pure, that there is an essence untainted by emotions we take on and experiences that have hurt us along the way. Our entire perspective on life, on ourselves and on people as a whole, changes when we connect once again to the pristineness we have inside of us, knowing that this is who we truly are and not the rollercoaster emotions we would otherwise identify ourselves with.

     2. This has been very supportive for me, to see people for their essence and not for their choices of emotions.

268. To understand emotions as simply ill-energy held in the body makes sense Alison. To know these emotions are not who we are is a powerful way of being able to begin to observe them and then make choices to heal them.
     “These emotions can feel like they are part of who we are, like being an angry or sad person, when in fact they are just an energy held in our bodies, the apparent difference between people only being how deeply embedded they’ve become.”

269. I have noticed that the times that I have been able to let myself really feel the source of something that I let hurt me, there was a feeling of that emotion be released from my body- like a giant weight lifted from my shoulders or an expansion of my chest and heart. The fact that I felt these palpable physical reactions in my body shows how the energy of emotions affects the physical plane of life- just as Serge Benhayon has taught since 1999.

     1. True Michael. If we accept the hurt is there instead of trying to protect ourselves from feeling it, we realise we then have a choice as the whether we hang on to it or let it go and allow ourselves to heal.

270. When we are more settled within – we are more capable to handle things from the outside. The more we surrender to our body – the more we feel.
     The more space we allow the more truly loving we get, as space is God”s love.

     1. Beautiful Danna – that feeling of the ‘everything’ that can be found inside when we feel the space inside us. Whether we call it Love, or God, or Joy it is always there, all the time, waiting for us to connect to it.

271. A breakdown is now often seen as a weakness but as you say it is often a point in our lives that allows for change and growth. Really seeing it for what it is and supporting each other when we have a hard time is the way forward to encourage people to learn and grow instead of push away feelings of not coping etc.

272. ‘Like the calm after the storm clouds have passed, there is a deep settlement in the body when someone allows themselves to feel and let go, like a sigh of relief – “finally I don’t have to carry this anymore!”’ I can certainly relate to this. I recognise those times when I have taken on unnecessary burdens but then have allowed myself to let go.. A very welcome feeling!

273. This understanding is profound Alison because people, on the whole, have difficulty explaining or understanding these events with their own knowledge. Expressing the description in this way gives an opening to think differently and be offered another feeling how the Soul clears the way for change. It feels like we have to go through this process for the breakthrough. I love your final statement of “The breaking down of our layers of protection is the key to letting people in and living a more love-filled life.”

274. I love what you share here – sometimes I have been in situations that feel like everything around me is breaking down, or maybe a picture or attachment I had held onto for a really long time is shattered or challanged and it feels hard, painful or uncomfortable. And yet when we ride this out, stay open and honest and are willing to go there, what is actually being offered is an opportunity to go deeper and shed all that is not who we truly are.

275. The very fact that statistics like this are so un-published and un-known is exactly why these statists exist in the first place.

276. This article inspires a stillness and openness in me, a lack of judgement, regret or guilt, an equality and beholding, a universality and purpose, an invitation and inspiration to the whole. This is the perfect foundation from which i can drop my protection and then begin to feel deeply into any hurts. This article is a true form of psychology. I have sat with many a counsellor or shrink, and can say that I have never felt this level of support, understanding, clarity, care and true purpose.

277. Dear Alison, what a fantastic blog to read. Straight to the point, clear and direct. I am sure a lot of people can relate to what you are describing here.

278. ” Break down ” from my understanding just about everyone has a ” break down ” for what causes a break down , is living a way that is not truly us , unloving , uncaring, giving up, eating abusively, drinking alcohol, smoking , drugs , simulating war battle by ” sport ” this list goes on . The break through comes when we stop not being us , but the challenge and difficulty is letting go of what is not us because we have accepted it and think we own it , but the truth is if we hang onto it ( not been us ) it will own us.

279. Just like everything is energy so is expression is everything. I honestly find it not so easy just to express how I feel because of the reaction. When, in fact expressing is all for the real face of change that is needed to restore balance on earth – easy said then done (pun intended). I suppose if I see this as a truth, then it’s a responsible I am to live.,

     1. Many times the reactions come from myself more than others in the denial of how I am feeling. Because many times I say how I feel and others don’t bat an eyelid or have a completely different take on the situation I hadn’t considered.

280. How important it is to let our protection go and to heal our deepest hurts – and allow our Love to express forth.

281. This is such a wise blog, thankyou very much for writing.

282. ‘Learning to cope, to be resilient and ‘keep it all together,’ are skills we’re taught to develop as children, with boys in particular feeling the pressure to ‘toughen up’ and ‘soldier on.’ Whilst these can appear like they’re serving us in the world and bringing the acceptance we’re desperately seeking, could this lack of expression actually be holding us in a prison of suffering, when being vulnerable could be the key to emotional freedom?’ I love this paragraph as it really resonated with me. Absolutely! My method of coping with life was to make the veneer look good, work hard and tick all the boxes, whilst underneath there was a lot of unresolved stuff going on! This toughening up really took its toll and whilst I am undoing all of this, the patterns I went into around not showing my vulnerability and expressing are still getting revealed and exposed!

283. It is very confronting when we come to see that our emotions and go to behaviors are but mere tricks to keep us boxed and held in our old ways. But also very freeing, a trick exposed is one that no longer holds power over us.

284. The rate that men are suiciding worldwide is at crisis point. Surely it is not possible to look at the rates and not consider that there is something seriously wrong with how we are raising boys and treating men. Forget about going into space and let us spend more on educating men and women on how to look after themselves and how to connect with themselves and each other in a meaningful way.

     1. I agree with you Elizabeth, I read an article recently about a family who son committed suicide and the devastating effect it has had on everyone in the family and their circle of friends and it seems they had no idea their son was struggling with life. And what was so poignant was that the mother said that if she and her husband could have that time over again they would have raised their son so very differently, without the burden of expectation they put on him to succeed in life and have the security in a university degree with great job prospects.

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