Category: – Self Worth & Acceptance

Life Behind The Mask

by Rachel Hall, Brisbane, Australia

I was looking back at my life, reflecting on the person I used to be only a few years ago, when it struck me that I didn’t even recognise myself or know who that person was. It was as if that person living my life was someone impersonating me, putting up a very credible performance that would have even the most astute acting critic well and truly fooled. But why was that? How could it be? – that person obviously was me, but somehow was not the person I recognise as and relate to the me I am today.

I realised that I have hidden myself behind a series of different masks worn to suit each role, act, relationship and mood that I felt would protect me, make me liked, give me confidence and cover up the fact that I was anxious and insecure and out of my depth.

So no wonder when I looked back I couldn’t recognise myself if, for most of my life, I had been presenting a fraudulent version of myself so as to fit in and appear like I had my act together. Continue reading “Life Behind The Mask” →

True Love, not Emotional Love

By Danielle Loveless, Australia

Like many, when I first met Serge Benhayon, his family, and other students embracing the esoteric way of living, I felt something very different, I felt much more in my skin or at ease with myself. I later realised that although these people felt different, they were just ordinary people getting on with life.  Continue reading “True Love, not Emotional Love” →

True Relationships – Being Love First, not Demanding it from Others

Danielle Loveless, Australia

I spent a large part of my life not liking myself, with a lack of self-worth, never feeling enough, and never having true confidence in life. I tried to cover this by excelling at everything that I did. In this time I also lived quite abusively towards myself, to try be the best so I could feel that I was enough, but also to confirm that I was worthless. This included many different relationships with men to try and feel loved, get affection, or feel that I was in fact enough and accepted by others. In these relationships I would allow the men to be quite harsh or rude with me, because this is all I felt I deserved. Continue reading “True Relationships – Being Love First, not Demanding it from Others” →

I no Longer Worry if Someone Thinks I’m Odd for Caring for & Nurturing Myself

I spent about 20 years of my life drinking, partying, trying to be one of the lads and having a complete lack of self-worth. I got really ill as a teenager from over-drinking alcohol, but just carried on as it was what I felt gave me confidence and was what all young people did, I didn’t know another way of being. It came to the point where I got so sick, I wasn’t digesting food properly and I had constant diarrhoea.

I decided to seek help, I was advised by a nutritionist to stop eating gluten and dairy and to cut down on my alcohol consumption. Over the next couple of years I started to feel better and decided to stop drinking alcohol altogether as I noticed how sick it made me. The problem was that this alienated my friends, all of a sudden I didn’t have a social life and my friends thought I was weird for not drinking. So even though my body was feeling better, my lack of self-worth was still there and especially now I felt like the odd one out. Continue reading “I no Longer Worry if Someone Thinks I’m Odd for Caring for & Nurturing Myself” →

Esoteric Women’s Health: What does it mean to be a Woman?

I used to think being a woman was about looking beautiful, having my nails painted and pampering myself. And that nurturing myself was having massages often and having a pedicure. I was always very focused on having a great body – muscular and lean and I took pride in displaying that body that I had worked hard for to show to others how I was taking care of myself. I pretty much strutted it around.

I remember running my body into the ground in order to maintain this image I had painstakingly created for myself which included maximising a gym membership and taking yoga classes – all in the quest to be as beautiful as all of the women I saw on magazine covers.

I felt the pressure to be perfect, flawless, fit and pretty in order to have a happy life and the man of my dreams.  Continue reading “Esoteric Women’s Health: What does it mean to be a Woman?” →