1,128 thoughts on “Self-abuse Under the Umbrella of Making it Right”

1. Trying to ‘prove’ ourselves to others or ourselves is to disconnect to the beauty and preciousness that we already are.

2. This statement made me ponder to how far I had come in my life, “I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs instead of what brings the greatest pleasure”. It is far from perfect but boy is it so much better to how I used to treat my body. And as we develop that relationship with the body, that love becomes stronger, that we sense more and more what serves and what doesn’t it.

   The beauty about this is that we discover more and more about you and this partnership is forever developing, and in that we are filled with true joy, something I hadn’t experienced in the past, when pleasure ruled. Living our lives from this is so much fuller, than searching outside ourselves.

3. How amazing it would be if each and everyone of us knew this, and lived this, ‘I explored the possibility that my body knows everything (!) – when a rest is needed, which food it needs, which exercise, how often to go for a walk and how to walk more gently.’

   1. Then we wouldn’t project or blame others about our disregards to everyone else, we would take full responsibility of how and the way we lived.

4. ‘I’ve always wanted to be that little step ahead, to be seen as the woman who can do it all… independent, not needing anyone, being respected because I could handle anything’. What is that respect laced with when it is so hard won in personal injury and what is it confirming in the world? We have so normalised hardness and a fierce independence that we no longer consciously clock how damaging it is to the individual and their health. I too used to be fiercely independent, wanting to show the world that I could cope, that I wasn’t fragile and vulnerable (weaknesses I thought) but in the process was just incredibly miserable underneath as I was constantly making compromises and negating the truth of how I was really feeling.

5. Are we not judging our-selves for recognition or acceptance as we must be thinking lesser of our-selves?

6. There is a simple learning that I take from this article which is that any time I dismiss, override and/or ignore communication from my body I am being self-abusive. My body is my greatest barometer and guide, learning to heed its messages is wise.

7. The Way of The Livingness, does support people to become more aware of their surroundings and in that awareness as it grows it’s like a veil gets lifted from our eyes and we see the world as it really is warts and all rather than what we just want to see and shove the bits we don’t want to see under the carpet and pretend they’re not there.

8. There are so many ways that we can override what the body is saying and end up being abusive towards ourselves…be this by jumping off a roof, pushing ourselves to exercise when the body is not up for it, keeping ourselves up when we are tired and need to sleep, eating more than our body needs to, not wearing warm enough clothes and the list goes on…when we really start exploring this it gets interesting as we begin to realise all the obvious but then also the not so obvious ways we disregard and disrespect ourselves.

9. Going against what the body feels at the time is such a revealing thing – it really does show us what does not work. And applying the opposite ie listening to the body and heeding its messages, is actually very difficult to do when you allow the mind and thoughts to take over. And yet, who is more intelligent – the mind or the body? To me the real intelligence comes from the body as it never compromises anything.

   1. Going against my body is a habit that is ill-considered and irresponsible. And our bodies are showing the signs. We are getting less and less well as our bodies have to show more and more clearly our deviance from basic standards of care, respect and community for ourselves and others.

      1. The more we choose to honour and respect our bodies, the more we are reflecting this way of living to other people, ‘I started being more caring and self-loving. With this, more hidden choices of self-abuse showed up… like eating food that did not agree with me, or too much food, or not resting when my body was tired etc.’

   2. The wisdom does come from our bodies, which is why it is key to be connected with them, ‘ feel first what to eat, which words are truly needed to say, and what I am really to do, and that being connected with my body is the real deal!’

10. Christina – what a gorgeous and honest blog to write and share. And you are correct in saying that many of us as women can relate to what you have wirtten in terms of the pushing ourselves and proving independence etc. Not that I have jumped off a roof, but there are many other ways I have unnecessarily challenged my body and pushed myself and yet when I let myself feel what it feels litke, it makes me want to not feel the pain and the damage done.

    1. Yes, many of us can relate with, that is how I used to live my life, ‘I’ve always wanted to be that little step ahead, to be seen as the woman who can do it all… independent, not needing anyone, being respected because I could handle anything.’

       1. But really living in the above way, is a form of self abuse. We are ignoring the body’s wisdom and many loving messages it constantly impulses us with, to present a false, and protected front.

11. ‘There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there.’ This is so true and great to clock all the areas I do push myself and then wonder why I am tired, grumpy, resentful etc.

    1. When we negate the truth of what we feel we are deeply compromising ourselves – that compromise is the same whether we are jumping off a roof or saying yes to a cup of tea when we really mean no. The effect is the same as both are eroding at our sense of empowerment and self worth.

12. Reading this article I can feel how in the past I would rather please someone and do something ‘right’ than honour myself and my body. That is changing now and the more I listen to my body the more there are things that I simply would not do because they hurt and I do not want to put my body through that.

    1. Learning to treat the body with the love and respect it deserves is life changing, ‘I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.’

13. Many people are living in abuse under a disguise of ‘doing it right’ in fact I would say many in society fall into this category.

    1. Superbly said LE – and this form of abuse is very ‘difficult’ to see when we are caught in the paradigm of doing things the ‘right’ way.

    2. Many people are living in a way to prove their worth, ‘A lifetime of feeling I have to prove that I am good and worth it, that I can do it, that people can rely on me. ‘

14. What I now understand from knowing Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine is how evil ‘nice’ is.
    Being ‘nice’ is so ingrained in our society it masks or puts a layer over the truth. And if we stop we can feel when someone is being ‘nice’ and it does feel horrible because it is so false and far away from what can truly be felt.

15. The moment we try to do something ‘right’, we have forsaken what is true. There is no ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ in our innerheart; there is only love and its expression or there is the withholding of it.

16. This was important for me to read ‘I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself. There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body’ as over the last few days I have been reflecting on how much I push my body or override what I am feeling in order to get things done.

17. Christina I could identify with a lot of what you write here, and I am sure thousands of others have similar experiences, I was particularly involved with sport at a high level and would happily compromise my body to defend or get a goal, the only thing on anyone’s mind was the winning, and the body heals after, only each time it takes longer to heal, and in the end I gave up most of my sports because my body could no longer handle the constant abuse I was putting it under.

18. My body is one of my best friends and a consistent trustworthy and faithful companion and guide.

    1. I love what you have shared here Andrew – I am better at saying this too now, however, I used to think the body was a nuisance and something that just did not want to cooperate with what my mind wanted it to do. Thankfully with self care and self love which I have developped over time, this has changed and I am far more appreciative of the body.

19. There are so many things we “can” do – ultimately we can push our human bodies to extremism – but is it loving for us to do them? Now that is another question altogether.

20. I know I have abused my body in many ways in the past so I could fit myself into a ‘picture’, so crazy how I would override my body’s natural way of being so I could be recognised and accepted.

21. Someone once shared with me that they nearly died when they were trying to do something to get attention/recognition and your blog reminded of this person’s experience. This makes me realise, when we move disconnected to our body it could potentially be very dangerous.

22. “And so – I jumped.” So often we jump through the hoop to seek recognition of ‘I can do it’ and then feel the consequences of hardening and self-abuse in our body.

23. It feels extraordinary to say that not everyone wants to hear the truth or to feel the love that brings, and yet that is our normal. There is a sense that we would like to be able to float through life, comfortable and unchallenged but that is not the way the world works.. and its the truth that stops us gliding into a possible or even inevitable car crash (be that in our relationships or with our health etc) and better now than hitting the proverbial wall.

24. A great reminder of how whenever we compromise our body we are in fact abusing ourselves, and how aware we need to be in order to clock these patterns of behaviour that we have and how simple it is to make a more loving choice, rather than constantly get caught by old patterns of behaviour which in turn wrecks our body.

25. Doing it right is not doing it true and all too often is ‘doing it the way it suits another person’.

26. “To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act. ” so very true and in my experience the only reason I do that, or did that, is to be liked in that situation. It actually all came back to me so by setting the foundation of truth we build that strength inside to make the quality we feel more important than anything else.

27. This can come in all of our jobs, for example staying at work until 10/11 pm to finish a deadline that is not that important and completely ignoring the need for rest and rejuvenation of the body; eating while doing work or not even showing in the morning because we want to be on time or early. Or the opposite, leaving work too early and creating for ourselves a pile to get back to in the morning and feeling overwhelmed, taking too many breaks and then stressing over the fact that we don’t have enough time in the day to complete all of our work. When we act in a lack of consideration to what is needed, we are in affect abusing ourselves because we are the ones who will suffer the consequences after.

28. The most loving thing we can do is say no to a way where we dismiss and abuse our bodies and being. I have loved working on this and with a few years under my belt I can sense that there is a depth to this that is beyond what I had thought was possible. Appreciation has been one the biggest learnings and not taking my body for granted, honouring and listening to what it is communicating.

29. The choice is always mine. Doing what the world wants or what my body wants. My body is the marker of Truth. Every bit of choice I have said yes to affects me and I can choose to be loving to my body or not. No one is going to take this responsibility for me but me.
    This is not easy for most of us to claim because of an investment that if we do not act like everyone we will not be accepted. Our work will drop us and we won’t be used. We won’t earn enough etc and all these worries enter to expose that we invest in the temporal world, our 3rd dimensional existence.
    Having no investment to be liked, or the need to be nice, and claiming our full right of multidimensionality, there is no question that life is not about fitting in but it is about Truth. Reflect truth in all that we do, everywhere that Truth has been hidden and bastardized and to shine and brighten up what we all equally know but has been hidden under cobwebs for most. And this choice takes care of everything in life.

30. I wonder if it was less “I can do it” and more “I have to do it”?

31. And as you say, the self-abuse Can come in so many ways when we are disconnected from who we truly are.

32. It is great to find more and more aspects of our hardness and control and letting them go, giving us more and more energy of a type that doesn’t leave us exhausted, unlike the energy derived from tension, stress and stimulants.

33. Yes we cannot underestimate the effects of us saying no to what we feel. It ‘teaches’ us that what we feel does not matter and it also allows another energy to take over and basically do what it wants with our body once we said yes to it. Which we then feel afterwards and regret.

34. Whenever there is right or wrong there is abuse – it is as simple as that.

    1. Black and white, right or wrong… such a setup always with winners and losers – no equality, no truth, no evolution.

35. The image of I can handle everything we construct when doing whatever we are requested to do, independent of the fact that it may have deleterious consequences for us, is a false one, since that abused and hardened body cannot really handle love.

36. “I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.” A great re-marker even if you know it. We live in a world that is setup to live from the mind hence it is so easily to be caught up in there time and time again… if it does not feel right its worth taking a moment and feeling what needs to change.

37. Respect for the body is not a chore, but a pathway of living a life of meaning and purpose. Without a body ready to work, we cannot really give it our all.

    1. And it is quite a joyful feeling to being able to give and receive more and more.

38. An absolute killer question: “Why do I think I am not enough being me?” We can go through life with a pretence confidence, have our chest puffed up, our head up high but our heart shut down and our shoulders curved forward in protection because we always feel like regardless of what we do, where we are at, we are not enough.

39. There is so much push and pull when we focus on getting things right or wrong. When we come with the purpose of understanding, the steadiness reveals itself.

    1. Beautiful words of wisdom Nattalija, thank you for sharing, I am getting a lot out of this.

40. It feels very important to call out the abuse that we have normalised and deeply adopted in our ‘normal’ for us to be able to make different choices that are not abusive – which would have to come from and with love. Those ‘I can do it’ and being right and recognised and validated and all that we use as our justification and motivation, they are pretty insidious.

41. I am struck by your phrase “i was acting from my mind”. Indeed if we only use our recalled knowledge and experience we are just like an actor playing another role, without coming from our innate wisdom and knowing of a whole body intelligence.

42. You couldn’t ask for a more reliable and honest partner, who is actually great in communication and there literally 24/7 and never leaves you (although you can abandon it) than your body.

43. We have a long way to go to make what is ‘normal’, or should I say natural for us and our bodies again the normal for everyone so that we can let go of all these abusive behaviors. It starts with one, then a couple and soon there are more and more who reflect this to others and set a new standard of what is normal in treating our bodies respectfully.

44. ‘You’ve made your bed you’d better lie in it’ – this attitude is misplaced and a trick. We can’t help but face natural consequence but there’s no need to whip ourselves. This doesn’t fix anything.

45. These words are powerful: “to truly ask and feel the body first – and listen to the answer on the inside. To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act.” Absolutely agree Christina. This is life-changing.

46. This blog reminds me how often I compromised myself by reluctantly agreeing to do things just so I can appear reliable. For example, putting my hand up for unexpected overtime so that I appear to be a team player when my body is tired and much younger staff could it. Is it not a stunt but I give my body just as much disregard.

47. I love this point about the body knowing how to move us. We can either surrender to that, and enjoy the grace and space that comes with it, or override it with how we think we need to move, usually to get somewhere or something. When we move in line with our body’s natural rhythm it feels like everything else in and around us is more aligned to that harmonious state too.

    1. And interestingly, our movements after an initial adjustment become much more effective and our needs are more than fulfilled.

48. This blog is very apt this morning and just what I needed to read. Doing things to please others has been a long-lived ingrained pattern, and this very morning a situation has come up where I know that if I say yes to what I have been asked to do, I will be compromising myself. I already know what to do and say, so this was a great confirmation.

    1. Don’t you just love that? This is awesome Julie, and we often receive lots of confirmations like these throughout our day but sometimes we miss seeing them because we get too caught up in doing this or that.

49. This is a great example of how we can so easily discount our body because we want to create a certain image, want to be seen in a certain light, no matter the cost to our physicality.

50. To be honest about what our body feels is so healing. If we put on a face or pretend, we are just saying to others that it is OK to compromise when we know in our bodies this is not OK. Pretending to be nice is a classic one of us not actually looking at why we feel a bit more shut down – if we do the fake thing then we never have to look at what is behind the fakeness.

    1. We encase ourselves in goodness and what is expected of us and then end up being resentful and feeling very lost as to who runs the show here – the expectations of others or the love within?

51. Its amazing how far we will push our bodies to not feel the impact of what we are doing to them. But it is equally, in fact even more amazing that when we do start to take care of how we treat ourselves, the level to which we can and do feel, and consequently what we then are prepared to say ‘no’ to because we get to feel the level of abuse that we have previously accepted as being ok.

52. I am learning to love and care for myself and I am beginning to get the feeling of what being in ‘love with oneself’ actually feels like. Like you Christina, it has taken me many years to begin on honour my body and although I still have a way to go I am appreciating the fact that I am on my way. Thank you for your sharing, and thank you Serge Benhayon for bring truth to this world.

53. Great to appreciate that we are sensitive that that a new level of care and support for our body can be delved and lived, regardless of how we have treated our bodies in the past. This example is stark in showing how different it felt to go back into a drive of pushing through to get something done or to achieve something. I know this feeling, I used to put on the extra boosters and zoom around to get jobs down, to lift something to keep going when I was tired, over riding how we feel is very unsupportive and the level of exhaustion and the hardness in my body I used to feel from it was debilitating. I see this as I reflect on how my life has changed, since beginning to honour and listen to what this beautiful delicate body requires in way of support and care.

54. It’s very true, nowhere else outside of Universal Medicine have I ever been reflected true love and honesty. This is what melts my heart, the genuine appreciation I experience, the gorgeous care of practitioners and the ever deepening love of Serge Benhayon. People do not have to be Universal Medicine practitioners, or be associated with the organisation in any way. Of course we all can live with integrity, truth and honesty – but how many of us experience unconditional integrity in their work place, in the supermarket or anywhere in the world? Perhaps it may be time that we start to look around our society and clock what is really going on.

55. The more we seek the right the far from truth we choose to see and feel.

56. “To be seen as the woman who can do it all… independent, not needing anyone, being respected because I could handle anything.” So many of us women have fallen for this same thing thinking that we need to be more. The fact is we are already everything that we are ever going to be and it is more about cherishing that, embracing it and living true to ourselves.

    1. These images how to be are very damaging as they are not true. They are influential though as many of us subscribe to those images.

57. Ah, the woman who can do it all, who can keep up with the boys, that is way too familiar and often only stops when we have a momentum-stopping event. Our body is a gift that can so easily be taken away, it is time we put it up on a pedestal and nurture and honour it as such.

58. Christina, thank you for sharing your experience of abuse and questioning how far we’re prepared to go to be accepted at work or in the home. It’s important to be aware of abuse from others, but more powerful to be aware of our own patterns of self abuse. The more we deepen the love we have for ourselves, the easier it is to spot our own abusive patterns and staying connected to our true essence makes it difficult to self abuse.

59. There is no respect from anywhere if we do not first respect ourselves.

60. Our return to love and Soul is possible through deepening our awareness to sense what is really going on in our body and respond to this with new food choices and and to express from the connection with that which is Divine within (and available to all equally-so).
    “I learned to shift my behaviors from choosing what was cool to have, fancy to be, or yummy to eat, into: feel first what to eat, which words are truly needed to say, and what I am really to do, and that being connected with my body is the real deal!”

61. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” – To me, this is the definition of true responsibility, and is so simple, yet we all seem to resist it in order to stay in the comfort of being able to do whatever we want, when we want to. However, I have noticed just how easy it is for things to spin out of control into disregarding behaviours when I do not stay with my body and honour what it is needing at any given time.

62. We have normalised abuse in the world, it’s a movement away from love that is causing so much misery, separation and pain for countless people.

63. By getting it ‘right’ we get it all so very ‘wrong’ as we are lured by the false sense of achievement that comes from forsaking what is true.

    1. Yes, it is like redecorating a home when actually you are in the wrong home to start with – not only the wrong home but someone else’s home that you have moved into because you weren’t paying attention!

64. Women are pushing themselves more and more wanting to prove that they can do what men do or even out do them. But what are we doing to our bodies, we are delicate fragile and tender and loving, so we are going against our natural way of being. I think it was great you were able to feel your body Christina and feel the harm you were doing to yourself and be aware of how long it actually took to recover from the roof jump.

65. Beautiful Christina, if we don’t honour ourselves then our relationships and life is nothing more than a bad act – and that’s a crazy stunt to pull indeed.

66. As women when we go through life taking it on as a battle and in warrior mode we will always be effectively fighting and resisting our innate nature to nurture and love ourselves and others equally.

    1. Agreed 100%, the key being do we go through life fitting into the mould – even if that is battling our way in warrior mode – or do we stop and consider what is true for us and then live that to the maximum.

67. I love how you describe the body being a compass by which we can navigate through life. Our body is made up of particles of the universe so will always be obedient to the universe’s flow. When I consider what I allow myself to be directed by – hopes, fears, other people’s wishes, dreams etc. – if not coming from love then it is all creating more harm to then feel the consequences of on an individual and global level.

68. “I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.”
    This is a very simple and practical truth and easy to live by and recognise when one is abusing the opportunity that living in a body gives a person.

69. The fear of getting it wrong was something that dogged my footsteps since early childhood and became an insidious pattern of numbing out from my body and holding back and closing down my expression. From attending presentations by Serge Benhayon, the harm and abuse this has caused throughout my life was finally (and thankfully) exposed. Re-connection with my body continues to bring greater awareness of what is not true for my body and to be able to say NO.
    “I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself”.

70. “To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act.” now this is one of the things that I have nearly mastered yet still from time to time put what I think someone will think ahead of the truth.

71. Such a great blog to read again, I can feel your dedication to truth and really making sustained changes, very inspiring.

72. What I have noticed is that we change our ways when things force you too and as soon as the pressure is off or the spot light shifts I often will just revert back to old ways that brought up the issue in the first place!!! So arrogant!

73. We take on many roles in life and run with them without questioning if they truly serve us or humanity. These ideals and beliefs can be ingrained in how we move to the point where we will not question where they are taking us. This is how many different levels of abuse can exist in our lives without us even knowing it, and only when we start to look at our choices do we see that there are many different layers of abuse.

    1. Beautifully said Julie abuse happens under our noses just because this is what we all do etc rather then truly consciously choosing a way of living.

74. “Understanding this is my key to truly ask and feel the body first – and listen to the answer on the inside. To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act.” I have had a pattern of giving myself away to what others want which I am learning to break with more love and respect for how my body is feeling, just the other day I was tempted to give in to others instead of feeling my body, I had the space to really feel and honour my body by not going there.

75. Great expose of how we abuse our bodies which can be overriding them in a physical way or being ‘nice’ to someone when we don’t feel like talking and just want to be. This is a continuing lesson for me but I can appreciate how I no longer abuse my body by drinking alcohol, smoking or saying yes when I truly want to say no. This to was with the support and teachings of Universal Medicine.

    1. It’s a big leap for most to see physical abuse of poisoning yourself with drugs like coffee, alcohol etc as the same as being nice but it makes perfect sense when you take it back to energy and the body as it causes us pain to move in a way that is contra to the flow of life and being nice is definitely not in the flow of what is true.

76. The ‘I can do it’ syndrome is incredibly pernicious, and pervasive in our society… Especially in men… Possibly? There is so much that we have taken on that makes this habit or pattern sometimes seem so much a part of us. It is essential that it is written about and understood so that the release of this destructive old paradigm can start.

    1. Yes, I can do it. Is it worth the damage, though?

77. “there is a way of reconfiguring the ‘normal’” The more that we and the more all of us live and move in a way that is honouring of our body the more the ‘normal’ will be a loving way to be.

78. It amazes me how easily I will jump into an old pattern that I thought was done and dusted! It’s humbling really as it shows we are continually learning and often running with an ill energy.

79. It is often when we wonder why we did something extreme and abusive to ourselves and then we notice that it is the every day little simple things where we do the same that allow for that build up to a more extreme showcase of the abusive behaviour. And it is in working on the little everyday ones that will support to say no in the ‘big’ ones.

    1. Yeah very good point Lieke it is the small seemingly not so ‘bad’ abuses – an unkind thought, a controlling thought, that we just let slide that end with much greater and more obvious abuses shouting, yelling etc. It is attending to the little micro that takes care of the macro.

80. Such a great point; ‘the abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.’ So it is our responsibility to be all that we are and not hold it back so we are not abusing ourselves and others.

81. ‘I used to push myself and my body really hard all my life, living in the belief that “I am strong, I can do that, and I’ll make it without any help.” Trying to show how independent I was as a woman, somehow trying to prove that “I can do it!”’ It’s funny really for one of the most healing and gracefully humbling moments of one’s life is when we put our hand out and ask for support from our fellow man.

    1. Absolutely when we are willing to say I haven’t got this all together and can just let the guards down is when we are vulnerable and incredibly beautiful and strong.

82. Pingback: Are we in an Abusive Relationship with Ourselves? – The Truth about Serge Benhayon

83. We have been trained to push and abuse our body first, and ask questions later. We need not wait for distaster to strike to reconfigure our life to nurture ourselves first. Thank you Christina.

84. I don’t think there would be one person who could not relate to doing actions to either be ‘good’ or be ‘liked’. If the action is not from truth or evolution then one would have to question what we are moving for and why…

85. Needing to be ‘right’ in fear of getting it ‘wrong’ is a defence we use in order to not feel, express, breathe and thus live, all that is true.

86. I remember going back to heavy lifting (out of sympathy for a worker) after having started to treat my body with much more care and respect and it hurt a lot, and for days! And I can still at times just drop that one little notch in my self-care but feel the effect immediately now rather than pushing through, trying to do, fix and impress others.

    1. The push we go into to get something ‘done’ is ironically the very thing that ‘undoes’ us.

       1. Brilliantly said, the drive to do something undoes us – that would be a great billboard slogan – I love it.

87. ” Just the other day I was asked to do an action stunt whilst shooting a movie – they wanted me to jump off a roof. ”
    When reading this , I want to say ” you want me to do what “

88. We buy into images of ‘independence’ and let them walk us to wherever they walk us. The images we buy of ‘independent’ are not just any image but ones that suit us and that make sense to us given our previous pattern of movement. In other words, all we are doing is to adopt an image to become ‘independent’ as a means to become even more dependent of the pattern of movement underneath the selection of the image. Just another way to keep going in the same pattern while we try ourselves to convince ourselves that this is something new to bring change into our life.

89. Being the superwoman who can do it all in life is such a trap as it is often at the expense of our tender and precious bodies and against our innate sacred essence.

90. I feel we are so conditioned from young not to have any consideration for our bodies what so ever, and usually it’s not until a serious accident or illness brings us to a halt and we are given an opportunity to re-evaluate our lives.
    I have found that The Way of The livingness introduced by Serge Benhayon has supported me to develop an awareness with my body, I have started to take more care of it and therefore me, and when I go back into the drive to get things done, how quickly my body shows me that I can no longer do this. I am beginning to appreciate and understand just how sensitive our bodies are and just how disrespectful and abusive I have been with my body.

91. ‘There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there. One may seem more dramatic than the other, but there is no difference – they both feel horrible afterwards.’ Absolutely Christina – there is no difference – while jumping for a roof may be easier to spot as going against the truth of the body, not expressing our truth and substituting what is true for ‘good and nice’ can be worse, as they cannot be faulted unless one is discerning of energy.

92. I love how you have uncovered the fact – the truth – that self-abuse can be very subtle, acts that we have come to accept as normal. But how wonderful that when you began to let go of the bigger forms of abuse that there waiting underneath were many more layers waiting to be healed. And as you say so wisely, and a great reminder for us all, abuse “happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.”.

93. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” . . . Saying no to abuse is simply staying connected and listening to what feels true for us. It is not allowing the ‘outside world’ to dictate who we are.

94. “I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself” – this is a powerful realisation to have, one that has the potential to change one’s life forever.

95. I find it fascinating, this link between wanting to be independent and actually pushing or asking too much from our bodies. Because when love is the measure for all activity, what is needed and what is done will always hold you dearly with no personal or outwardly abuse.

96. Very wise words on how easy it is to disregard our inbuilt compass and simple, practical suggestions to support yourself in reconnecting to all that it has to offer in support of maximising our vitality and our purpose: ‘feel first what to eat, which words are truly needed to say, and what I am really to do’, so that we are able to know ‘when a rest is needed, which food it needs, which exercise, how often to go for a walk and how to walk more gently’. The challenge is then to heed that knowing and to reflect on what gets in the way when we choose to ignore it.

97. Behind the seemingly endless oscillation between right and wrong, lives and breathes all that is true. We need only tune into this to know which way to move through life. All else is simply a detour and a distraction.

98. We are not always aware we are living in an abusive way, it can be very subtle, but any time we are not living love we are in fact being abusive.

99. It is beautiful to have a physical body that never holds back the truth. Without it we would be lost as to what is abuse and what is not because we could get away with anything!

100. I would also add that abuse happens any time we compromise or lie to ourselves – in the slightest, smallest of ways. If we don’t catch ourselves and call these nudges out, eventually we find ourselves acting in the total opposite way to who and how we naturally are.

101. Awesome commitment to: ‘let love be the fuel that runs my engine’. When we choose to let love in the changes are massive and we can feel the ill-choices that we have made previously and start to choose differently.

102. This is something I am very much learning ‘feel first what to eat, which words are truly needed to say, and what I am really to do, and that being connected with my body is the real deal!’ Including going to the gym which I recently started. I was given a programme to do and just started automatically doing it without feeling first if it was right for my body and some of the exercises I was given did not feel right. It took me a while but soon I stopped them and instead did other exercises that supported me. It is great that you did not ‘beat’ yourself up about doing the jump but instead got to feel and reflect on all that you have done here and this is also so true and very well said ‘There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there.’

103. Christina, this blog is truly inspiring and a great reminder of the fact that how we listen to our body and nurture it, is the quality that we bring to the world. Having met you in person, it is hard to imagine you living in this hard and tough way you describe.
     “I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure. I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have”.

104. This is so true Brendan. I am beginning to see that abuse is very much hidden at the moment in so many areas of our lives. It seems we only consider the more extreme abuse to be abuse because we have normalise everyday abuse and accepted this as a way of life but it is very much far from a true way of life.

105. Choosing to be more aware is a huge support for us to eliminate abuse, what you’ve shared highlights how much we have to numb and override our sensitivity and awareness to follow through with an abusive act on our body. No wonder we have so many products, trends and lifestyles trying to sell us various ways to numb our body. It seems to me our world is geared towards celebrating people who are willing to abuse their body, it sounds pretty warped but this is what I can see is happening and our world is currently predominantly running on abusive energy.

106. Just reading the title of your blog – it can never be “right” to self-abuse or any other form of abuse so that makes things very simple.

107. We have an in-built understanding to answer when we are called , and to follow instruction when they are given . The difficulty is we have a deep trust of others , that its only when the outcome has happened that we realise that what we are doing is harming and destructive. A sad way to learn that we are not living out true connection.

108. I can so relate with this, ‘I used to push myself and my body really hard all my life, living in the belief that “I am strong, I can do that, and I’ll make it without any help.” Trying to show how independent I was as a woman’; until my body brought me to a stop with this way of behaving.

109. One could look at this experience as a great way to celebrate, because the fact that we can now clock an activity as abusive, that in the past we would not have regarded as abusive, shows how far we have come in our development and relationship to self-care and honouring our body.

     1. So true Raegan, when we start to live more love anything that is not love sticks out, that’s why the teachings of the Ageless Wisdom are so needed in the world today.

110. The truth is often inconvenient which is why others can react quite badly to it and so can we. It may be the last thing I want to hear if I’m about to do something that my head wants to do but my body is saying No! I may spit the dummy, have a tantrum but I cannot deny that my body speaks the truth.

111. ‘whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself. There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body’ – Abuse is anything that take us away from the harmony and love that we truly are.

112. When we look at the extremes, we think we are doing ok because we are not experiencing them, but there are many levels of abuse that we put up with and its great for us to start looking at the subtle ways they occur. The other thing is that we often look outside and think it comes from others (and yes it does) but we don’t see how we are abusing our own bodies, so our relationship with ourselves is the place to start. This was a great blog to read Christina.

113. This is such my learning at the moment, as my body goes through a clearing process of discarding all the ill choice’s off my past. I’m learning to re-imprint that I am enough without needing to do anything. Learning that even when my body is tired and needs to lay down I am still an amazing being that offers an incredible light to humanity.

     1. “Learning that even when my body is tired and needs to lay down I am still an amazing being that offers an incredible light to humanity.” Love that Kim. Such a beautiful thing to remember.

114. “Why do I think I am not enough being me?” What a great question, one that I can certainly relate to, one that i have asked myself many times. I feel we all revert back to our learned way of being, that life of protection, not wanting to fully claim that we really have it all inside of us. That we really can be enough, we just have to give ourselves the permission to live it.

115. I love how you say this – “The only truthful ‘making it right’ is to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine. No more, or less.” – and when we honour the truth that we know or feel from our body then it is something that truly honours everyone else as well.

116. The more love and respect we have for ourselves, the less abuse we will say yes to and partake in. It’s a simple equation and your example is a perfect illustration of that Christina thank you.

     1. Very true Jenny, with a deeper love for ourselves anything that is abusive sticks out a mile.

117. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others.” and this is because in that disconnection we are most likely to accept less and compromise our true feelings in order to tick the boxes of what is expected from us. We need to develop a relationship with our bodies in order to set a standard of decency and respect that we will accept in our lives and anything less is abuse and should not be tolerated.

118. Hi Christina, it just goes to show what a great foundation you have built for yourself over the years for you to feel the extent of.the devastation in your body and get this lesson so readily. And it is a great point that you make about pushing yourself to ‘be nice’ being as abusive as pushing yourself to jump roofs.

119. “I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure. I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.” Treating our body with love and care seems so obvious now – after all it is the only one we have this lifetime. It often takes a big scare, such as accident or brush with a serious illness to bring us to our senses. But it feels all to easy to allow subtle acts of self-abuse to trickle back in. Great to re-read your blog today to remind me how precious we truly are.

120. “I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.” Check. A pertinent reminder for me as well – that no matter how tiny or big, when it is not truly right in the body, it is abuse. And I enjoyed the lack of critical judgement in which you explored why you did it, because I feel that is the key for moving forward. Lovingly asking ourselves those questions, so we can work out why and then let it go and continue to keep choosing true loving choices for ourselves.

121. When we are so used to being recognized and be rewarded for meeting and/or exceeding an expectation, it can be hard to appreciate and honour the truth our body speaks which often contradicts what and how that picture of ideal is asking us to do/be. It was only after I encountered Universal Medicine that I started to recognise the abuse I have been inflicting onto myself.

122. We are very used to being in a situation where we are asked to contribute and play our part to make things work but we are never taught that we deserve to be treated tenderly and with deep respect, we learn that everything comes first. You give a beautiful example how very ingrained these learnings are but that it is very worth to allow ourselves to connect more with our body and respond with its tenderness and fragility instead of bracing for impact in daily life.

123. Deeply appreciating the honesty, wisdom and insight here Christina, in your words here about our true capacity to honour “this sensitive vehicle” that is our body, and the deeply sensitive and beautiful being also that we are – a being that need not give oneself away to that which simply fails to honour us.
     It’s a continual learning, isn’t it… but well worth the process.

124. Great blog Christina – I can see how accepting abuse in one area allows abuse from other directions too. When I allow someone to be condescending for example I’m more likely to want to eat food that my body doesn’t want or need.

125. I always used to want to say yes to anything anyone asked of me but now see if I 1st am not supporting myself then I cannot support another. However I used to think saying no would hurt the other person and I should say yes to help them but now see how sometimes helping someone is not always what is needed and can actually make things worse for them because they then do no get to fully see the consequences of their actions – cushioning how much we may think it helps I have found it the long run generally it means nothing changes.

126. What I am finding to be very cool at the moment, is the more I am are aware of myself and how I move the more opportunities play out for me to see where I can go deeper with my connection and where the abuse outplays. The more we listen and observe our bodies and how we live the more we uncover about ourselves and how much love we are willing to surrender to or hold back. Life is for learning and deepening our expression to reveal the true divinity within.

127. Defeating pleasure – indulgence – is surely one of the most challenging of tasks on a plane of life where the physical and material are exalted above all else.

128. ‘independent, not needing anyone’, oh yes, this was me, I would and could do everything alone, I held the titles of super-mum and super-women, and prided in that, yet I was always feeling exhausted and not good enough. Thankfully that can no longer hold in my body, through the many lifestyle changes I have made to be more self-loving and self-nurturing and appreciating all that I bring.

129. “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there.” On the surface there may seem to be a million miles between these 2 examples, and for me too a few years ago this was the case. But now, after reconnecting to my natural way of living – letting my body lead the way – I completely agree that they feel the same to my body. There isn’t a sliding scale of abuse where one abuse is more or less than another. There is just abuse. It’s either abuse or its Love, so if it’s not Love, it’s abuse. The mind doesn’t like this truth, but the body celebrates it.

130. “I can do it” has got me into loads of trouble before too, learning to treat my body like it’s precious has been revolutionary. We literally can’t exist without our bodies – so it makes no sense to abuse them…

131. I feel that it is only unitl we embody a constant appreciation in our lives that we get to understand that anything that is not from love is abuse and therefore harming for our bodies and detrimental to our own evolution.

132. I know this abuse so well, for many years I lived in a way that allowed ‘pleasing’ abuse. I’m now walking the path back to truth and feeling what harm I allowed to myself and others which isn’t always pleasant. My biggest learning is that I can not truly love another if I don’t live, express and walk truth.

133. Abuse is something that we all have to get a handle on, as it is so prevalent in our lives, whether we want to admit it or not. Anytime we go against our body we are abusing ourselves. Over time this takes an enormous toll on the human body so no wonder illness and disease figures are on the rise.

134. We do so many things, For so many people, for so many causes, accommodating everyone and everything except honouring the connection, as you say, Christina, with our own bodies

135. Having been exposed further to my own behaviour patterns it was very supportive to read that they are only there when we don’t take into account how our body feels to be in any given moment. It’s not that the abuse is stronger, just more repeated. And we can choose to feel and build on repeating that relationship instead.

136. ‘The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.’ I love what you share here Christina, so many people can live in self-abuse and it is seen as quite normal and accepted by others such as playing any sports or drinking alcohol, or overeating etc. When we make a choice to build a loving connection to our body something we may have thought was ok in the past now sticks out as being abusive and to honour this feeling brings a deeper love and care for ourselves that offers a powerful reflection for others to feel.

137. It is incredible how insidious the need for recognition and rewards from the outside can motivate us to go absolutely in the opposite direction to what supports us to be in communion with our souls. ‘Fun’ is a classic excuse for anything goes and the body is left behind to pick up the pieces. I am so far from that now but still live so far from being in true connection with my soul every minute of the day it’s quite a shocker to really feel. But I do appreciate the steps towards this way of living as it is infinitely more than the life I lived before.

138. How beautiful to be at a point in life where having made the jump, you could really feel how your body was. The communication of the body was loud and clear and no longer hidden, seemingly subtle and ignored. I spent much of my life pushing and pushing my body. Nowadays, when I do that it doesn’t take long before I realise the impact of the pushing and drive. I have built up so much love in my body that now when I push, it just doesn’t sit right with my body – whereas before it was simply how I lived and was my normal.

139. No matter what others may say, how they behave or what they think is the ‘right thing to do’, we each of us always have direct access to an inner compass that tells us what is true. If we choose to ignore it and pretend it does not exist then it is us who make ourselves the stunt dummies in all of this. We are only acting at being our true selves and can’t be surprised when we are hurt. The crazy thing is we use these sad experiences to ignore our senses in an even bigger way. Thank you Christina for calling for this acting out to be ‘cut’.

140. It was an incredible revelation when I stopped and felt the abuse I was doing to myself by ‘doing’ for others. There is no love in ‘right’, just as there is no love in ‘good’, to find love one must be in truth, then love is all that is lived.

141. “Trying to show how independent I was as a woman, somehow trying to prove that “I can do it!” How many times is it images that bring us to action to do what is not true to our beings? When we want to become the image, or to confirm the image, we do not really serve us.

     1. And yet how many of us question those pictures? I do now and ask myself ‘who am I cooking this for?’ But when in the belief that the thoughts I receive are mine then we live very blind. Feeling the body whiles these thoughts carry out I have found is the best truth scanner/radar.

142. Our greatest opening that allows for abuse is the fact that we do not recognise nor accept our own true worth.

143. Self-abuse is a normal way of life for most of us, from the big stuff like team contact sports, to the little stuff like having caffeine all day just to be able to stay on top of things. There is another way though, and with self-care a new way of being and living is possible.

144. The more the divine body is honoured and appreciated, the more we allow ourselves to feel the abuse. The deeper this connection becomes the brighter our sight is to see the tiniest of abuse.

145. The abuse we allow on our bodies to either fit it with what society deems as normal or to push ourselves and our bodies through constant stress and tension for recognition or making things right by others is a form of holding back. Hence when we go into abuse or do something that the body does not appreciate we are not only hurting ourselves but also not offering a true representation of what love and deep care looks and feels like to others which keeps everyone locked in comfort and evolution and true growth is halted instantly. Bringing ourselves back by changing our movements and listening to how our body feels can instantly change this age old pattern and begin a new movement towards love and true care for all.

146. I did this the other day when I made myself walk to work which took me over an hour. I ‘thought’ I was being healthy and that it would be ‘good’ for me, but actually it was far too much for my body and I went into a push to do it. My body ached for days afterwards, and felt really hard. A real lesson in not deciding from my head what is good for me, but always listening to what my body is not ready for and what it truly needs in each moment.

147. Any movement that is made that does not come from our inner truth is a movement of self abuse.

148. What about the first paragraph of this article, I think I was shocked. They asked for someone to jump off a roof as a stunt? I am not saying this is strange or unbelievable but it is shocking in just the thought of it, let alone actually do it. I’m not a big fan of heights and doing something like that would take sometime to get my head around and I know I couldn’t go through with it. At the same time this is one part and there are plenty of other parts where I don’t literally jump off a roof but where I block or ignore a feeling that I have had to not go through with something. This may not have an obvious physical outplay but it’s still there and at times harder to explain or be aware of yourself. We are good and more comfortable with exposing the extremes like this roof one where I can say I wouldn’t do that and apparently feel better when in actual fact my roof jump would just be under a different heading and more subtle and truly no ‘better’.

149. The more women value the preciousness they are, the less they need to prove their worth by doing because they know that everything they do carries the value of who they are, regardless of what the task is or who is watching.

150. I have learned that from building that lovely connection with my body there comes a point that this love in my body is so strong that it is not accepting any abuse to it anymore and from that I then make my choices in which it is impossible to be persuaded to do differently.

151. Thank you Christina. Your blog reminds me that I used to believe it was completely normal to abuse my body with food, alcohol and strenuous or harsh activities that caused me physical pain. Now I can feel how abusive it is to walk on a cold floor with bare feet. The more we fall in love with ourselves the less abuse we will accept.

     1. Hi Leonne, I do know that too, that from the building of love in my body it comes to a point where it just does not accept any abuse anymore and in that I have noticed that behaviors I used to do in the past, like your example of walking with bare feet on a cold floor, are now experienced as abuse and unacceptable for my body while it was completely normal and acceptable for me up to some years ago.

152. Going against ourselves is abusive – no matter what we try and guise it as, our bodies will always and ultimately show this to be the case.

     1. Beautifully and simply said Kylie – we can make elaborate stories to justify our choices, but at the end of the day, if our choices are not in line with our highest energetic state, with our Soul and the equality of Love we are all from, then we are in the abuse of choosing to disregard our essence. Living in the mind at the expense of the body is a good example of this.

153. Gosh how many of us want to be right? Usually it is when we are arguing with another person and we just know that we are the ones who are right. But in truth we are not usually right, no one is and when we focus on that, we never end up getting anywhere. So it is important to let it go, not go into ‘being right’, it isn’t bringing things back to a foundation of love.

154. When we need to make a decision about anything, if the decision comes from our body then it will be the true one. If it comes from our mind it will not ultimately support us.

155. It is easy to pick up on the big moments of self-abuse but the smaller momentary ones are less likely to be picked up on because they have become so ingrained in our lives. Just a small moment where we allow our mind to wander into judgement or sadness or thinking about something else while we are responding to this text means we are not being with ourselves and bringing all the love we are. The most loving thing we can choose is to hold ourselves in love and completely surrender when we realise this is happening, as the wayward spirit likes to wander off and not take responsibility for its choices. Every beautiful blog written with honesty is an opportunity to bring more awareness to the livingness of our lives and an opportunity to choose more love in the next moment.

156. It is so easy to be tricked with the idea that there are grades of being abusing to ourselves, and some things are not so bad. A great wake up call with your example and :” There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there. One may seem more dramatic than the other, but there is no difference – they both feel horrible afterwards.” If I don’t just use my mind to grade the abuse, and if I check in with my body, yes they both feel horrible afterwards.

157. ‘Why do I think I am not enough being me?’ – I had an experience of just being me this week whilst presenting to a group of about 100 people. What I felt was that in me being me, they were able to truly connect with what I was sharing with them. This has really supported me to understand that first and foremost, I am here to be me and all of me, not to try and be someone else, someone who attempts to please, someone who seeks the approval of others – but the amazing and glorious me – through whom true connection with others is made. How perfectly simple this is and how very beautiful it feels.

158. What we each consider to be ‘right’, our values can be quite different from one person to the next. In the face of so-called ‘wrongs’, ‘right’ seems to be the only way out and I have totally been investing in being ‘right’ and ‘good’ myself, and I am also learning that ‘right’ is not truth and our body is the marker of truth that I have a very personal relationship with.

159. All we are asked to feel is how we are part of a grandness that we seem to not want to acknowledge, stubbornly holding on to only being a human being which we definitely are but the design is absolutely divine.

160. I agree Christina that abuse is happening to us every time we are not ourselves but live from what we are told to be instead. And when we do so we are not only abusing ourselves but everybody we are with equally as from the reflection we give them they are told that it is okay not be themselves and from that to allow abuse to enter their lives.

161. It is almost crazy what we are capable of with regards to disrespecting or dishonouring our bodies and how normalized it is… ‘why do I not think I am enough being me?’ is indeed the right question for in feeling ourselves as enough and the preciousness of who we are, it is impossible to not cherish the body that holds us.

162. This is a great understanding you share Christina: “I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure”. Learning the difference between what my body needs and pleasure is a huge awareness. I know I have lived in a society that encourages choosing ’pleasures’ – considering this as being what is needed because it makes us happy. Time and my body has proven over again that happiness is very unsustainable, as is every pleasure I’ve experienced at the expense of my body.

163. Being true to ourselves is a biggie – one I’m discovering the subtle ways of presenting its self. Very easy to fall for the little ways I give my power away for a moment of being good, approved of accepted, liked etc. The irony is that by ‘doing’ something is no confirmation that I’ll get the response I think I want even if I do the activity.

164. At he moment I’m working on my vulnerability, and trying to explore what that actually is for me, which I’m feel a similarity in what you have shared. For me I’m starting to see how much I have invested in being hard and capable of doing it all, emotionally and physically. This investment is like an actress that I have spent much time on showing everyone how great and capable she is. There is now a breaking down of the self created wall/actress that needs to occur for the true women to be seen. Building love and acceptance of myself feels to be the key to allowing this women to be seen.

165. Living up to pictures as to what we should or can achieve as women mean that we can put ourselves under lots of pressure, putting our bodies into lots of disregard. This really does feel like self abuse. But it is up to us to bring gentleness and tenderness to ourselves and let go of those pictures.

166. Trying to fit in and please others is path that is open to self-abuse. When we don’t honour what we want and how our bodies feel the choices we make can be harmful. Be it mild or extreme self abuse is still that.

167. When we try and value ourselves only from what we do we totally dismiss our innate qualities that enhances and forms the foundations of all that we do.

168. There must first be a denial of our true self before we can push ourselves to prove we are anything other than such loveliness. This does not mean we have to walk slowly and softly but more so rediscover that there is a way we can move that honours this preciousness and does naught to abuse it.

169. Fake nice feels equally icky and yucky at the same time.

170. Being hard, I can do it all, and independent is one of the many false versions of being a woman on offer in society. Perhaps this is a reaction to being treated as less, of not wanting to need anyone or ask for support. Whatever the reason, it does great harm, and takes us away from living as the precious woman we are. In fact, from my own experience you don’t even recognise these qualities in yourself, as the false veil wont let you see through it.

171. I like the analogy of jumping off the roof being the same as any decision that is made without it feeling right in the body. We can often try to justify that some behaviour or choice is better than another or if we do it less often, it makes it ok. Any choices made without the body are like a poison and this builds up over time.

172. ‘There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there.’ I was confronted with this ‘being nice’ during a photoshoot today, of course not the first time but to really feel what you are describing here, how it is abuse towards our bodies but also adding to the collective abuse women allow to enter their bodies is huge and requires an honesty and a willingness to see truth and how we all contribute to the abuse that is happening on this planet.

173. Great blog Christina, thank you for sharing.

174. It is pretty much relentless and all around in all we do, that people will like and reward us for what we do. We as a society pay no heed to quality – just looking all the time if the picture of what we see. But ultimately this never works, it doesn’t matter what special effects we use or tricks of light to make things look like they have moved – life always returns to the truth in our body. Whether we honor this now or admit it on our death bed, it is never too later to start to say no to the stunt jobs of so-called reality and say yes to care, love and tenderness in everything. Thank you Christina for sharing this precious blog.

175. It is through our commitment to developing our relationship with the truth that we can break through the illusion of what we have called normal and once again reconnect to that innate quality within our bodies where we know what life is all about and that is to offer a true reflection of love and trust of the divine.

176. “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there.” This is huge and I know the pushing through for recognition as well, but you are right everything we do against the true feeling of what to do and what not to do is abuse or at least it won’t do us good. It is key what we make our reference point in life: to be recognised or to be love.

177. It seems the more self loving choices we make the more abuse stands out, and the marker of what is and is not abuse starts to change, along with the depth of questioning. There is no point in berating ourselves in these moments because quite often there is so much healing on offer in these slip moments if we care to be honest with ourselves.

178. Well said. “I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.” What I have been quite shocked about is the more I said no to things that hurt my body, the more it pushed other peoples buttons! Clearly it pushed mine too or I wouldn’t have been so sensitive to other peoples opinions but it would have been much easier to stay in the abusive behaviour that was seemingly normal life than to be a reflection that actually what we are choosing as pleasure and fun is actually hurting the greatest gift we have.

179. I walk in nervous energy most of the time, even from my kitchen to my bathroom, never truly settled and in my body. This is something I have been experimenting with, walking me, gently, not walking nervous energy. I love watching Serge Benhayon walk, this is a marker for me. There’s a total surrender in his body, a completeness, an ease, he’s not fighting anything, and a joy. I have felt what it’s like to walk full of myself in absolute joy loving my body.

     1. Our love is an emanation that commands the body to follow in its wake. It is formlessness followed by form. This is how Serge Benhayon moves and by virtue of this reflection shows us that it is the true movement of us all.

180. Saying no can be the most loving thing we do for ourselves and others. I can certainly relate to pushing myself to do something to please others in order to get recognition of the ‘well done’ or ‘thank you’ at the end, but it was often at a cost. Over time I have become more discerning but I can still get caught out particularly at work.

181. So true Christina that it’s relatively easy to cut out the choices we know are obviously harmful to us. But after that, what next? We’re constantly being offered the opportunity to go deeper, to continuing refining what we choose so that we have even more awareness and can live greater levels of love.

182. Could we say that because we aren’t perfect and it would be impossible to live this way then when we say, “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” that we can see that abuse and it’s subtle layers will be with us in this world always. It will be our awareness and our deepening and appreciating of all things that aren’t abuse that will support our understanding of where it is still unseen. We or I have an image of that at some point abuse ends, it stops but what if this isn’t the case, are we disturbed by that or similar? We are looking at something that is a work in progress but not from who we truly are, if we were aware of who we truly were then we could see the work that is needed here. What I am saying is there is no end point, no place of no abuse in this world. That shouldn’t lead us to resignation but more inspiration that once you’re aware of one point of abuse, this is a time to be aware of the next and this is ongoing.

183. I love that you questioned why you slipped back into this old pattern and did not flick it off as a it-just-happened-once moment. If we allow ourselves to be caring with ourself and our life to the very detail there is a depth and a richness that unfolds that leaves no room for boredom and idleness.

184. It really is time to deconstruct that what we have made our normal. As everybody is abusing themselves this will not say that his is a normal way to behave as a human being. lets bring back the true meaning of what is normal back into our lives and with that do not accept any abuse or what soever to be part of our normal ever again.

185. Ever so often we do things that our bodies do not really enjoy to fit in, but we suffer the consequences. But living in this way we keep ourselves and everyone in a state of comfort and stagnation, and there is no true reflection of love. And yet when we make a choice as such, it is an opportunity for us to see it clearly and to understand why we make such a choice, and simply to acknowledge and to respect our next choice. This is how growth happens, in which life is always supporting us in.

186. Pingback: The Truth about the Cycle of Abuse – The Truth about Serge Benhayon

187. There is such a vast difference between the right thing and doing what is most loving and supportive for your body. I know I got very caught up in the whole right and wrong but they are just opposites and reactions and are not actually love. Right or wrong has never actually progressed the world back to love – only love and truth do so any less is further keeping us in separation to the love that we all are.

188. I love your honesty, Christina – and in sharing it in this blog you are offering a wonderful reminder that we all have an opportunity, a responsibility, to choose what our bodies are asking; to choose love in everything we do and that it’s okay to make mistakes. If you hadn’t jumped from the roof this sharing wouldn’t have been possible.

189. Yes Christina our bodies are our true compass and show us much in how we treat, abuse and or care for ourselves. Building a relationship with our own bodies and feeling what works and what doesn’t is a great way to learn, live and love and its something that can be deepened and expanded for our whole lives. Our bodies are amazing.

190. We can justify so much of what we do, especially as the “normal” way of living is at such a low peak, with much indulgence and living in neglect or at least disregard for our bodies and true health and especially when we get recognition for doing such things, like you jumping off a cliff. It would benefit us all to take a breather now and again and consider what is really going on and at least give ourselves a chance to come back to a kinder and more truly fulfilling way to be.

191. “I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.” The particles that make up our physical body are in tune with the Universe and constantly communicate the truth of the way we are living.

192. It’s confronting for me to read your blog but it’s so true all you share, that any form of going against our body is a form of abuse. And yes, this truth is confronting for many hence the attacks on Serge Benhayon, but we actually desperately need those who speak the truth. Look at society on a global level, the events, increasing mental health and health issues, abuse, and corruption for example, and see that we are living in a form of decay – but not questioning it because it’s now so widespread it’s considered normal. We need a big shake up out of the complacency and back to living what’s true.

193. What you have shared Christina is super important, that making loving choices and changes in ones life, can only be effective if we develop a loving relationship with ourselves and listening to what our body is telling us. It is so easy to override and not listen, but when we do miracles can occur.

194. Now I have had my eyes opened – thanks to the presentations of Serge Benhayon and others – to the realities of abuse and particularly self-abuse, I now know abuse is not just something that happens to victims of domestic violence. Self-abuse happens every day in a myriad of ways, simply through what we choose, allow and have accepted as normal.

195. Breaking the entrenched patterns of a lifetime, or lifetimes, doesn’t happen overnight. The important thing is it is happening.

196. Our body is like a compass that always knows the direction we need to go in with food, rest, care, and how to nurture ourselves, and what we need to do is listen, and take the appropriate action.

197. An interesting point made that I have been guilty of and that is overriding the bodies natural impulse for the purpose of some type of recognition or reward. However as I am becoming more connected to my inner knowing these situations are becoming less frequent.

198. Being aware, self caring and looking after ourselves is the key to calling out and naming any form of abuse; self abuse or abuse from others;
     “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” It is thus incumbent on us too live the true love that we are.

199. Absolutely true Christina, it does seem for most of us it is our default to comply, ‘do the right thing’, go along with what’s expected etc. and end up doing, saying or involving ourselves in things that are abusive to the body. Learning to listen and honour the body at the level you are talking about takes significant work and a constant commitment… one that’s well worth the effort I have to say.

200. ‘The abuse happens anytime we are not aware of ourselves’ – I so agree. When we choose to disconnect from the body, it’s like we’re saying to it that we don’t care about it and don’t want to care for it. When we’re present and aware of what we’re feeling, we’re more empowered to feel what to do next, and by taking care of our body, we take care of everyone.

201. Our body is certainly our greatest gift. It is so common to abuse it but what you’ve shared shows how incredible we feel when we listen and choose to care, love and honour our body. This impacts on us as well as others around us. Our body supports us to connect to others when we choose to connect to ourselves.

202. We often get many accolades from others for doing the right thing. But it is often a far cry from what is true, and often we won’t receive any accolades or anything close when we do the right thing. But we are the ones who live in our own bodies and we have to live with those choices. The only accolades I want are ones from myself.

203. Very very well said : we are almost nowhere in the world reflected the love that we are. AND so this is what made my head turn when I first walk passed Universal Medicine.. (so the speak). And so since I attend Universal Medicine courses and am a student of The Way of The Livingness – I am revealing all the uncomfortable areas in my life and am truly willing to see evil at all costs. I have chosen to no longer be blind.. and so, what you shared Christina, makes absolute sense; ‘To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act. ” This is actually the answer to how to make life become more simple, and reveal truth in life.

     1. Brilliant Danna. I totally agree, we can choose to make life more simple, embrace truth and love. Letting go of expectations, ideals and beliefs supports us to live with simplicity.

204. I’ve found that experience too where when we take the care with one thing it allows us to feel the next layer that is ready to be addressed. The depth to which we can care for ourselves know no bounds and to feel a fragility in our bodies and respect that we are not superhuman is something I am learning to find immensely enjoyable.

205. Amazing. It is peculiar how much we hurt the body by driving it to achieve what we think we need. Our bodies are super tender and fragile and as a being inside we learn to please certain aspects of life while contorting our body to do it, meanwhile missing out on the true joy and connection with the body.

206. Such a clear and bold statement, “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” If only we lived by this, knowing that we never allow abuse when we are deeply connect to who we are and the love we are.

207. Making things right, at least trying to is a real killer. Unless we are love nothing changes. And so trying to justify or correct something without changing the energy of it means we stay trapped in the mess. I used to think I needed to try my hardest to get through life and please others. Now I know I just need to be all the love that I am and the rest takes care of itself.

208. It is true as we deal with the more obvious forms of abuse the more hidden ones come up. The more aware we chose to be the more aware we become of how unaware we are. Thus, an extremely loving person by every day standards may own up to being abusive (knowing that anything less than love is abuse) whilst a very abusive person might say they are loving! It also means we can’t compare with each other as each one of us is responsible for our own personal development and what we reflect to others.

     1. Great point Nicola that the more aware we become, the more we realise how unaware we have been.. which is sometimes a bit of a shock. We can then either react to this and not want to feel our choices to be unaware, or keep going with the awareness and see what else unfolds, without judgment, just acceptance of the choices we made and understanding of why this was.

        1. absolutely and knowing there is no perfection or end point!

209. As you say Christina, there are many and varied ways of abusing our bodies, both subtle and obvious. I know there are times where I have justified what I want to do but then suffer the consequences of ignoring my bodies truth after the event. Thank you for an inspirational sharing.

210. Wow our body is amazing in how it communicates to us,it is us who ignore the messages and keeping going along in our old ways. When we stop to listen, our body speaks loud and clear. Loved reading your blog, when we ignore the messages we are abusing our body.

211. The more gentle we are with our selves the more we become aware of how abusively hard we have been on ourselves, for me I have to break the cycle of beating myself up for being abusive to myself which of course is abuse on top of abuse. Slowly but surely I am breaking the cycle of abuse in my life by understanding myself and my ideals and beliefs and letting go of my hurts at the core of this cycle and appreciating just how far I have come.

212. Brilliant piece Christina. ‘…to be seen as the woman who can do it all… independent, not needing anyone, being respected because I could handle anything.’ Gosh, that’s me, and so many other women I know.
     This need for me to want to be everything to everyone and do things the ‘right’ way is so so strong. Terrified of someone thinking I am too weak to do something if I say no. It’s crazy, but it’s true and it happens everyday! Awesome that you are a living example of another way! thank you!!

213. ‘Every need it has, and all the love I have in me, my body expresses with beauty and grace – far beyond any demands or expectations. In short, it is my pure and solid partner.’ This is true. Yet, how often do we leave our bodies, or abuse our bodies in the attempt of finding a partner or love elsewhere…? If we honoured the simple fact that our body is our ‘pure and solid partner’ first, relationships would take on an entirely different quality.

214. The insatiable craving for recognition is a driving force that tries to push us to value what we do not who we are.

215. Christina coming back to this blog I realise how profound your awareness is because of your choices and experiences. Self abuse is the norm for most of us and because we are taught to be polite, mind our manners, make things look good and not really express the truth of how we are really feeling in the connection to our bodies, we all tend to override self nurture and what is needed in the moment by the body .. What you are sharing cuts through all of that and presents a different and much more honouring way to be.

216. The attraction and pull to be recognised for being right and do the right thing may be deeply ingrained in us all but that does not mean we cannot turn the tables on this game and defeat it by slowly letting go of the unloving beliefs that drive us in that righteousness.

217. It is confronting to think that abuse is automatic for a lot of us. That it is automatic to eat the wrong food, automatic to over eat and automatic to say put downs to our closest friends.

     With any machine that is the malfunction on auto mode, what do you do? You reset it.

     Maybe it’s similar to how we approach life.

218. The desire of wanting to be a “little step ahead” does not come from the body. Yet, it is the body that pays for it.

219. Being connected with our body truly is the real deal! Through our body we can sense what is true and harmonious and not be ruled by beliefs or pictures of how we think we should be.

220. “To me Serge Benhayon made the step of speaking up for true love, an inconvenient way to talk or express sometimes. Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal”. Serge Benhayon is certainly the master of speaking up for truth and love; a wonderful example for us to learn. As you so beautifully point out Christina it is important to identify and correct the abuse we pour on ourselves.

221. I am looking forward to the day where I can feel there is no longer self-abuse in my daily experience. The nature of self-abuse is endemic, such as carrying too many bags up the stairs, not drinking water because I’m too busy and not going for a walk even though that is exactly what my body needs. There is a path of self-care that I choose, and each day the abuse is less and less.

222. The more loving and caring we are with ourselves the less room there is for abuse. The more we are disregarding the more we are likely to allow abuse in and it is in every detail of how we live. The more of the detail that we fill with that love, then love becomes our only choice.

223. I too have pushed my body through sporting activities which have been far from loving, all in the name of ‘winning’, at a considerable cost to my body, at the time I was so disengaged from my body I didn’t really feel the aches or the pain until after, and each time it took longer to recover. My body was trying to tell me something and at the time I was turning a deaf ear to it because sport got me all the recognition I was wanting at the time, now I see things very differently.

224. Christina, this really highlighted to me that the moment we go into any form of action or thought that is not loving we are in fact in abuse. I love how over time you have become more aware of this and that at every moment we have a choice, and we can always make a different choice.

225. To push through, to try harder, to redouble our effort, to toughen up, to be ‘strong’ – this is such an ingrained philosophy that we fall into being. And yet as you show Christina, did this ever work in our life? Did it ever help us out? Sure we might pass that test or make that jump but wow at what expense?! Really abuse can come back to the quality we choose in every moment. Anything less that Love is a place we are hurting. So what would it be like for us, to consistently choose tenderness and vulnerability instead of the ‘being strong’ robot?

226. Christina, it is crazy how we abuse ourselves and bodies almost 24/7 – effectively any moment we are not living the love we all are then we are being abusive to our body. The more we see this as a reality the more we see the responsibility we carry.

227. ‘The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.’
     Until true love is the normal for us all, unfortunately there will be abuse, and the possibility of abuse. Choosing love is a responsibility we each hold that impacts on far more than we can imagine.

228. ‘All because I’ve always wanted to be that little step ahead, to be seen as the woman who can do it all… independent, not needing anyone, being respected because I could handle anything.’
     This is a strong picture that I think a lot of women can relate to. I certainly can… Why is it that we think a woman must be like a man in order to be valued? This is so often coming from our own perception of how we need to be and not at all from what is around us. A woman honouring her own body is incredibly refreshing and inspiring for both men and women.

229. I can relate to what you share of pushing my body, especially when it comes to work. I will often push through and disregard myself to get things done for others because I think that’s how it should be. I am learning to let that pattern go and start to be more honouring of myself. Like you say there are different things you notice the more you start to honour yourself.

230. Rereading your blog today Christina I am reminded of the power and wisdom of listening to our bodies and speaking up about what is true.

231. Reading your blog today, I was reminded about how super sensitive our bodies really are. But if you are not tuned into that, it would be easy to write off what you are saying because how could one jump take you a week to recover from? But it is true, and when we stop living in hardness (which stops us from really feeling what is going on), we can start to connect to the incredible sensitivity that we actually are. And I when I look around what is going on for and in the world, we are hardening up more and more because we dont want to really feel what is happening to our fellow brother and sisters. And what we are doing to ourselves and each other.

232. What a great sharing Christina, it amazes me what abusive and harmful things we can do to ourselves when love is not in the equation. Putting our bodies on the line for sport or our jobs or whatever in total disregard does not have to be the norm but is just a simple matter of choice. Once this is understood the body is quick to point out when we slip back into those ways that are harmful or it always did but now we are far more aware.

233. “Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal.” It is not so much that people do not like to hear the truth; it is more that people feel a relief when someone actually does speak the truth. What does occur however, is what you are speaking about here and that is people do not want to face within themselves what it means to hear the truth. It means that we no longer have an excuse to keep doing what we are doing and we don’t like been asked to be more responsible in our lives.

234. Its quite shocking how we live in this loophole of (self) abuse when we are not living right from the body. It is extremely self-imposing as one activity leads to another and suddenly we are facing this big dishonoring situation and don’t know how we got there, but it actually started long before with the lack of attention to detail.

235. To truly live from what my body communicates has shown me the massive amount of abuse I had “normalized” in my daily life. Just overriding what my body communicates and with this hardening my body to an extend that I am desensitized more and more to the abuse I apply to myself and also others impose onto me. The more I care for myself the less abuse I accept from others.

236. Even though we pretend our body doesn’t know everything, we know that it does! If we get sick and feel unwell, we know our body is speaking the truth. If we get up and feel tired, we know our body is right, we are actually tired. So why don’t we listen to it all the time? Possibly because it tells us things we don’t want to hear.

237. I have asked myself the question “why do we so easily choose the activities that don’t support ourselves”

     From this blog I can see how it can make a little more sense. Thank you for sharing Christina.

238. We so easily put our body on the line to get the job done, somehow – and at what price? It does not have to be as dramatic as jumping from a roof, I can see it in lot of little instances when we habitually put the outcome first and the body a distant second.

239. Great blog Christina, I hear what you say and I have done the same in different ways, putting my body on the line for comfort (like riding a scooter when I use to live in London for convenience but nearly died a couple of times as a result). I am glad to be able to drive to work now, it feels a lot safer and so much more self loving.

240. “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there. One may seem more dramatic than the other, but there is no difference – they both feel horrible afterwards.” Absolutely Christina. Both of these put unnecessary pressure and tension on the body.

241. This blog exposes how cunning we can sometimes be with ourselves. We like to be able to claim that are living truth without actually dealing with the hurts and underlying causes of how we have chosen to be. This is the way we can live in this world.. a part can show that we are well while another part of our lives is not actually well at all.

242. Hello Christina and I laughed again today at the first part of your blog. There is an old saying, “if they told you to go jump off a roof would you?” It’s a saying that was given to me by my parents if I had used the excuse of my sister told me to do it or whoever told me to do it. They would always bring the picture back to what I had done. Reading the first part of your blog, you actually went and jumped off a roof, it would have parents all over the world stumped on what to say next.

243. Yes we have put so much value into recognition and being liked for what we do in life that we can go to extremes as you shared to get that recognition or like from others. If you consider the whole of what happened, the tension and pain afterwards in your body etc, it tells a lot about the people around the performance to. They have been tricked in what true love is and what is not as well. True love is all encompassing and would never champion a jump of a roof if that would have such effects on the body performing the jump. And the same for the person making the jump the recognition you get in such a moment does not equal true love as you shared here so beautifully in your blog.

244. Prior to finding Universal Medicine it never occurred to me that there could be a different way to live with our bodies, a way which did not involve abuse or pushing the body to achieve something. In all my 55 years no one has ever even suggested that I be gentle with myself or to appreciate myself, this in itself is astounding and shows how disconnected we are to our bodies and what true well-being means.

245. When we listen to and honour our body and its wisdom we will also honour everyone for its wisdom is all-encompassing.

246. Christina what a great change: “I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure.” That is really inspiring and a motivation to have a look of how I am treating my body.

247. It is amazing for me to see what awareness does for us. What one day we think is ok and don’t even blink an eyelid, the next day we can see that it totally wasn’t ok. I use to live in a way where I thought ‘it’ was it. I went to a couple of Universal Medicine presentations and listened to Serge Benhayon and walked away thinking about all the things in my life. We think we are doing the ‘right’ thing and it’s not until someone presents something to us that gives us a chance or choice to change what we are doing. Universal Medicine has consistently offered me that choice but never concerned or pressured me if I didn’t choose it. I can see and feel from how I am that my life, the way I live is completely different due to the presentations of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon and all that was offered to me was more awareness, awareness of something that I was actually already feeling but just thought I wasn’t.

248. Each day I can see areas that I can bring more love too, and in that I have to accept that there has been less love than I truly deserved. Sometimes this has to do with how I have been letting people treat me even in long term relationships there can be patterns and choices that no longer support how we are with each other and need to change.

249. It is amazing how much we put our bodies on the line to fit in and be accepted by others. The common thought of ‘I will be ok’ or ‘it’s only a little thing’ or ‘it does not really matter’ all come to mind. But it does matter, the way we treat our bodies adds up and then affects the way we move and are with others. For me I find if I let myself go in one area every other area gets affected.

250. Christina, great to read today and understand and feel how deeply abuse affects us and our bodies and how much we know this. An obvious question but one we do all live by is why would we hurt ourselves in anything? And are we aware of how much we do hurt ourselves? That is abuse pure and simple.

251. Abuse – This word needed clarity in its redefinition. Christina, thank you for your openness in this. Growing up I only defined abuse as physical. Now I have realized anytime I allow situations that are in disconnection of my self.

252. Thank you Christina. It is great to question and speak up about what we do in the name of art, our work, to please another, to get things done – anything really – and how that is truly effecting our body and well being.

253. It has taken me some time to realise that my health is the most important asset I have and to appreciate my body, all that it does for me and how quickly it responds to love and nurturing.

254. The word abuse is so interesting in its interpretation. We often “think’ of the physical kind that is done by another to hurt but often don’t realise that are ways of living that leaves us feeling depleted and empty is no different.

255. To understand that abuse is more than a physical punch or angry words is big, as our society labels abuse as this. What you are offering here Christina is another layer for us to all be aware of. How we self-abuse. I have realised the reason I allow myself to be abused by others is because I already abuse myself, so it is my ‘normal’ therefore I don’t question it. At the moment I am becoming more and more aware of how I talk to myself, and it is extraordinarily harsh at times, and completely unwarranted. The fact is, we all have Love within us, everything else that is not this is just ‘stuff’ in the way of this Love being expressed. It is gorgeous to read that you are exposing the ‘stuff’ that is in the way of your unending Love and letting it out to flow more freely for all to enjoy and be inspired by. I am doing this too and it feels amazing.

256. Hello Christina and you jumped off a perfectly good roof when the building wasn’t even collapsing? I’m kidding and I love what you say. We think we get to this point and it comes down to either jumping or not jumping but what we conveniently choose not to see is all the little things that walked us onto the roof in the first place, as you say, “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” So the ‘jump’ was already done as you are aware, well before you stepped foot on the roof.

257. I am coming to realise that abuse is not just when a person is physically hit or spoken to aggressively but it is also how I am with myself in my day, every day eg.every time I rush and go into racy-ness or allow thoughts to take over and tire me, I am indeed abusing myself.

258. It is my responsibility to say ‘No’ to every thought that is not true in every moment and every time I do this it is indeed a moment to appreciate.

259. Learning to honour our bodies and accept ourselves for the delicacy and tenderness that we are is the only way to break away from the self-abusive behaviours we subscribe to in order to be accepted and recognised by others.

260. Knowing that your body knows exactly what is going on in any moment can change everything about the way we live. The body knows what food is right, what activity is right and even what people to have in our lives. It is wise beyond words.

261. Well said Christina, ‘abuse…happens anytime we are not living the true love we are’. This is because 1st and foremost we are love and so even the slightest deviation away from love is abuse. It goes to show how far from love we have drifted because most people consider abuse to be something more extreme and violent.

262. I find the more I know who I am, and that total sweetness and beauty that’s within us all, the less propensity to hurt myself or abuse myself, it’s like… the deeper the sweetness goes the more I say no to anything potentially abusive or that’s not right for my body, after all, my body harbours that sweetness!

263. To love and cherish our bodies, to truly listen and then honour what our body says above all else is a continual learning, ‘To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act.’

264. The ‘I can do it’ attitude is so strong in so many of us, but what does being able to do anything really get us? I would much rather have a cared for and well-loved body than an enormous ability to conquer anything any day!

265. As each day passes I begin to become slowly more and more aware of what abuse is, both my own self abuse, and what happens between people. The more I become aware of the abuse, the less I can tolerate it, and thus a new harmonious life emerges.

266. ‘The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are. ‘ So beautifully and simply expressed Christina. What you share here is very powerful and offers me a stop moment to feel in my life where I am still in self-abuse or going against what feels true for me. As you say the body is key to support us with this, as it will always reveal the answer.

267. I enjoy coming back to this blog as it beautifully highlights the wisdom and knowledge we can access from listening to our bodies. Listening to our bodies certainly exposes the different levels of abuse we allow.

268. “The only truthful ‘making it right’ is to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine.” Christina that is such a good way to live my life as it felt not so exhausting to live like this.

269. What I like about this blog is that you ask a very big question “why do I think I am not enough being me?” But you answer it with the body. Not with an intellectual response. In fact, some might say that you don’t actually answer it – and in the normal, temporal, psycho-analytical way, I guess you don’t. You do something very different and very beautiful. You go to the body first and use that to answer the question. This is huge for me. So often I get trapped in the mind, trying to work stuff out. But what you have shown is a far greater wisdom and, frankly, a way, way easier process – anyone can do it – no PHD’s or “Paths to Enlightenment” needed. Just listen to what the body is telling you. And there will only ever be one very simple answer.

270. Christina. there are so many ways of abusing our body. In Melbourne the weather can vary greatly between the early morning when I leave and the rest of the day. In order to avoid carrying too many clothes I suffer from the cold and berate myself for feeling so because so many people around me, lightly clothed, appear fine. So for appearance sake and convenience I let my precious body shiver. Thank you for making me reflect on this.

271. Although it sounds extreme to many of us to be doing stunts, it is really the same as any of us pushing our bodies to go above and beyond what our bodies are telling us is ok. If I overdo it at work to just get things done so that the others can see what a great worker I am, it is the same. Interestingly, recently, because I am really listening to my body and working accordingly, there has been a negative reaction from someone else. However, rather than go into reaction, I have stood my ground and embodied more self care, also promoting it within my work place. If I had wavered and not recognised the energy for what it is, I may have fallen back into trying to please, but there is so much support now to not fall back into old ways that the trick was easy to see.

272. Totally Brendan, and as we learn to treat ourselves less abusively and with more love, the deeper more insidious forms of daily self-abuse reveal themselves – no wonder we so often end up with major ill conditions, exhaustion and worn-out bodies.

     1. Living with all levels of abuse in our lives will inevitable have an impact and effect on all of our relationships with people, family and friends. What quality will we be bringing to others if we are living a life of daily abuse. What level of true support, of love and care can we hold another in if we cannot do this for ourselves. What will be the quality of our thoughts if we are moving in a frayed, exhausted, hurting body ?

273. When we drop the bar we often allow more abuse and when someone presents zero tolerance to abuse they are often questioned or frowned up.

274. Yes Brendan, we do tend to justify ourselves away in situations often, and to our detriment. Either from not wanting to see the truth or not wanting to stand out, or conveniently accept all of that, as normal, just so we can ignore what is right there and stay in our comfort which is really ignored discomfort.

     1. Yes Julie, how often do we put up with discomfort and pain just to not stand out or be remarkable, to go along with what everyone else is doing, or keep everyone happy.. now I am learning how not only is this deeply self-abusive, but in fact abusive to all… and entrenching a culture of abuse in our society. It is definitely worth understanding this to a deeper level and how it impacts on everyone.

275. So true that our bodies are the greatest gift we have.

     1. Absolutely nicolesjardin, they carry the most precious essence that is forever and from God.

276. Great blog Christina, there are so many things in which we can override the truth our body presents to us. It is great to get to know all of them and see that there is more to life than getting recognised and seen as independent or strong. It is about caring for ourself and show through this that love is the way. Nothing more and nothing less.

277. I so loved coming back to your blog again Christina, it really brings home to me if we don’t listen to our body we are abusing ourselves. As soon as we leave ourselves to become something for another it becomes so easy to make choices that are unloving and unsupportive, even something simple as you said being ‘nice’ when really at that moment you did not feel to talk. We can learn so much from our bodies they are our greatest ally.

278. Thank you for sharing your story, which I am sure many can relate to on some level and thanks for the practical tips on how you slowly came back to you ‘I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure. I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.’ We so easily take our bodies for granted, until something like an accident, illness or dis-ease shakes us up and reminds us what a gift our body is and how it should be loved and looked after. We have a long way to go in understanding and living this to the true potential we can however Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine show how easy and gorgeous it is to live this if we so choose.

279. “whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself. There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there.”
     No wonder Serge always taught us: ‘The body is the marker of truth’. And beautiful how you expose the variety in abusing our bodies and this not being only a physical act.

280. I love the honesty in which you shared how long it actually took you after your jump to be able to walk gently again, because of the pain it caused. I experience how long it really takes to heal and that this is always longer than I expect or want it to be. Our bodies are so delicate and we are often so rough with them.

281. I sign this: “Nowhere else outside of Universal Medicine was I ever reflected this truth before, to which my inner heart responds without doubt.”

     1. Me too, Sandra and I am grateful every day for finding the truth in Universal Medicine and being a Student of the Way of the Livingness.

     2. for me also Sandra, only from Universal Medicine and the reflections of truth by Serge Benhayon, was there the resonance within – here was absolute truth and love in absolute service to all.

282. “Even though there is a lot of illusion around what is normal, there is a way of reconfiguring the ‘normal’ to stop the constant abuse we are all in. The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” Beautifully said Christina and a very honouring way of changing how we live in every moment making it very simple. Thank you for this marker.

283. This is brilliant Christina – really helpful thank you ❤️

284. I am finding the that there is a ripple affect that occurs when just one person stands up and says no to an abusive situation, as this simple act can actually clear a moment of space for everyone there and offer an opportunity to look at what they too have allowed, and if they would like to continue to allow it, or to also say no.

     1. I agree Shami, it is like this one person gives everybody permission to feel for themselves what they are choosing and he or she adds the choice of self-care for all.

285. Doing the ‘right thing’ can be poles apart from doing the ‘true thing’. The expectations, ideals and beliefs we may have can override the feeling of doing something, and this can be quite challenging to say ‘no’ to what has been the ‘norm’. Honouring and developing more regard for the body more definitely reduces this challenge.

     1. This is important! “Doing the ‘right thing’ can be poles apart from doing the ‘true thing’.” – gives us a reflection of where we are with our way of living as a society… That this is possible, is because we did allow it.

286. “So, after having stopped making obvious destructive choices such as motorcycling, heavy partying and pushing my body hard, which only led to my body being in pain, I started being more caring and self-loving. With this, more hidden choices of self-abuse showed up… like eating food that did not agree with me, or too much food, or not resting when my body was tired etc.” It’s true – the more gentle we are with ourselves the more we allow ourselves to feel how naturally tender we are and allow the sensitivity of the body to speak which of course can’t otherwise be heard and felt.

     1. Gentleness takes the momentum out of life and brings us back to the space to truly feel what is needed for us in each moment.

287. Thankyou Christina, your quote “….whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.” feels like a very simple yet powerful statement for any person to take into daily life.

     1. Yes, a simple and powerful quote. It just shows that the goal posts of what constitutes ‘abuse’ can be redefined and moved.

        1. And again it is in the simplicity that the truth of life is revealed to be lived in a very practical everyday way for everyone available at any time, simply a choice.

288. I learned to shift my behaviors from choosing what was cool to have, fancy to be, or yummy to eat, into: feel first what to eat, which words are truly needed to say, and what I am really to do, and that being connected with my body is the real deal! This paragraph says it all Christina, as what you are talking about takes responsibility and a dedicated commitment to being present in each moment so your movements impulse you. I can see you give yourself the space to be this way with yourself, very beautiful.

289. Christina I love that you are someone inside the movie industry, speaking up and telling it like it is. We need to shatter the myth that the creation of illusions such as you describe is OK. How can people harming themselves in the name of entertainment be OK? What exactly is being sold here? Are we all implicit in this peddling and consumption of abuse?

290. Christina I really appreciate reading how as a result of listening to your body, you were more easily able to feel when something did not feel right. I’ve been around an actor who had to jump off a building and drive a huge truck. And I could see how anxious he was before these stunts, but his way of dealing with it was to numb his body rather than listen too it. So you sharing this, from the industry you are in, is a gift and shows there is a way to be with your body and honour it.

291. ‘…it is my pure and solid partner.’ This line is pure and solid gold. How many of us grow up with the understanding of what our body offers us? For most, our body is our slave.

292. ‘I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.’
     Attuning ourselves to the myriad ways we abuse ourselves takes courage. If we consider the tiniest act can constitute abuse if it negatively impacts the body we must then shine a light on all we do.

293. There is one advantage to the self-abuse of jumping off a roof – the impact on the body is fairly immediate. Less obvious forms of self-abuse, such as overwork, can much longer to reveal their effects. It can be only years later we realise what has happened when we are confronted with a burnt-out adrenal system.

294. The automatic tendency to self-abuse demonstrates how, even with awareness, we can slip back into our old, deeply ingrained ways. I appreciate the on-going need to always be aware, to catch ourselves before we ‘re-offend’. It takes a willingness to know when we’re about to go into self-abuse auto-pilot mode.

295. Whether we abuse our bodies via what seems to be quite obvious means (such as performing stunts) or by sitting quietly behind a desk (over-working) it seems desire for recognition is the driving force. To be identified for what we do rather than who we are.

     1. Good point. If we just were who we are we would be in intimate connection with our body and self-abuse would not be an option, as soon as we want to be something or someone we are not, we abandon that natural connection and allow for whatever it takes to take over our thinking and acting.

296. Very true Brendan, the ‘right thing’ is generally only ‘right’ according to a particular ideal or belief and generally isn’t ‘right’ in truth in that is doesn’t truly support all equally.

297. I love what you share here Christina. We can actively deal with the abuse we allow from others and direct towards ourselves but then there is a deeper level about what we are prepared to do to please others, to tow the line, play the game or in seeking recognition. This goes beyond compromising our bodies in obviously physical ways to every choice we make that dishonours ourselves, such as not speaking up when we see truth being abused.

298. It is remarkable how we are capable of looking at life in segments. We choose to look at one slice that seems okay and ‘right’ but we ignore the rest of the whole, which may very clearly be saying something is dodgy and the whole thing needs re-evaluation.

     1. Great comment Golnaz! That’s so true – we can, in this context, easily know our tendency to jump off roofs is self-abuse but not examine the self-abuse that is taking place when we eat, for example. Or we can give up cigarettes but replace it with sugar. If we are to be honest, the whole needs to be examined.

     2. All our parts are connected and we are in fact not able to bring a quality just in one part of our life and in another part not. I found that by starting to change/develop a part of my life, the other parts are exposed where I do not live the same, higher quality so to speak. They stick out and call me to either change back my step (regress) or to bring up (evolve) the other parts as well.

299. Christina this is a great example of how we all run our bodies and take them for granted until something serious happens and then we get a wake up call. I have known a few people who have had very serious health issues such as a heart attack or a car accident, but still continue on the self destructive paths.

300. If I go on here, we can say ‘to jump from a roof’ is not good for anybody (literally!) and so, nobody should do it. Not even stuntmen/stuntwomen. And so we would see no movie where somebody does it. A lot of things we do as normal every day but specially in movies I would call abusive to the body – so if we would stop this, if we would live and make films in non-abusive way, this, our world would change immensely.
     I know a film where a part of the story tells that a young girl was raped but they do not show it and I appreciate the filmmakers for this. They do not hold back that raping is something that happens in this world, but they did not force the actors to go into this energy and live it in this moment of filming – even if it would be ‘just acting’.
     It is to ponder on what is ‘the right thing’ – in truth for all (all bodies) and not in a shortened understanding of it.

     1. I love what you present here Sandra. I have often wondered how child actors especially cope with their roles in traumatic/horrific movies – and some of them are quite ‘adult’ in their themes and or what they depict. Though in truth it is not only child actors we need worry about – adults are no less sensitive, just more conditioned to accept such themes as ‘normal’. You are right when you say Sandra much can be suggested. Though we would also need to question whether many movies serve a purpose at all other than entertainment at peoples’ expense.

     2. Movies can be so instructive, so beautiful. Or they can be completely vacuous and damaging, Imagine if they were rated for their evolutionary quality as well as for their production and entertainment values.

        1. Should not everything in this world be rated for its evolutionary quality? Now that would be fun!
           I start today and ask myself by everything I do and say – was/is this evolutionary or not? New level on responsibility to live up to. Life will change with that from scratch!

        2. Bring on the r(evolution) Sandra!

301. Yes, the idea of “I can do it!” is very much laid into our foundation of a human being. But is it real? Is it true? Fact is, we can do a lot. We just have to see how far we did come: we fought a lot of epidemics, built amazing cities terrain, fly through the sky and even into the universe. But. Really, how far did we come with all of what we reached, with all what we’ve done? New illnesses appearing, people are unhappy, sad, frustrated and we are far away from living in a true harmony together – neither with the planet, nor with each other. War and peace alternates with each other – if not between countries, then in our own homes, in our own chests and/or minds. To abuse ourselves and others did become normal these days….this is really alarming and I appreciate from the bottom of my heard that you raise this topic here Christina. For me, the idea of “I can do this” lies underneath all of our problems, traditional and modern epidemics: Identification and Individualism. In true fact: we can’t do it. We can’t do anything. We are instruments of energy and all we can do is choosing which energy we are aligning through and so, which energy works though us. To accept this makes me humble and let me feel my responsibility. The part of me who wants to stay with the individuality (my spirit) gets nuts (went wild), but hey: a true and lovely education is what we need anyway – so why not start with our spirit?!
     “Keep still little horse, we are on our way back home.”

     1. One of the most damaging catch-cries of my generations was surely ‘Girls can do anything’. Yes, it might be true that women can technically do anything, and be the equal of men in all sorts of regards but should we be? Last time I looked around women were struggling with the impact of ‘I can do anything’ in their bodies; exhausted, depressed, ill and manifesting diseases that point to a fundamental disharmony within themselves. As a living example of the damaging effects of ‘I can do anything’ in my own body I can firmly say this is not the way to go.

        1. Good point Victoria, we ‘can do anything’ – but should we? Where does this lead us to?
           Reminds me on ‘the American Dream’: everyone can become a Millionaire, but does this really change our life into something that make sense? In fact becoming rich in a material sense does not make us fulfilled. A lot of money can cover our emptiness for a while but will never be enough at the end. The richness we are longing for lies in us and in the connection to where we are coming from.

     2. You are so right Sandra, the spirit is like an unruly horse. Bucking and twisting and protesting it shies away from responsibility to continue on its individualistic, head-strong way. No wonder we are lead on such a merry dance away from our souls – there is a lot of horsepower to contend with there. Gentling the horse takes time, discipline and dedication, on-goingly so.

        1. Consistency and Love will be educators of gold…

302. Christina, it’s a joy to read your clear revelations. It’s so simple, the body knows all there is to know in any moment, if we can be still and connected enough to feel it. It’s simple, but also such a glorious miracle how it has been designed by God.
     And what Deanne says about the ripple effect of our choices is also a huge point to remember. I feel that the energetic responsibility can be such a joyful inspiration, because I am not only loving with myself but also, at the same time, with the whole human race, or even the whole universe. That awareness brings such an expansion.

303. I have pushed myself in many ways for recognition too. In speaking words I thought were the right ones to make everyone comfortable, to pushing to get things done when I was tired. These things took me away from truth and took me away from me, so they are abuse. Anything that disconnects us from our truth and love, is abuse. No more comparing with things that are worse and no more excuses.

304. So beautiful Christina, “I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.” If we walked through life with this understanding, how would we treat our true friend, unwavering guide and greatest support we could ever have. Would we start to appreciate what it brings for us and arrest the abuse that we heap upon it, denying ourselves the wisdom it is constantly offering us.

305. Christina- essentially you have written about responsibility and delay and offer a great example here. While the scene might have been shot and you suffered personally with pain for a whole week, what evolution might have been possible for the film director and crew if you had said no and in what other ways might evolution have been delayed in the week you were in physical pain and could not walk gently and just how big was the ripple effect? I feel I could learn a lot by pondering the ripple effect of how my choices to be less are impacting others.

     1. Wow that is big Deanne! To take the responsibility about how we have delayed a learning for another by holding back our true reflection is really challenging. Great to see the effect of our choices in this world and great to understand more what is going on. What Christina felt in her body for one week was this effect on ‘her world’, her radius so to speak….And how wonderful will it be to feel our effect as well when we are living in truth and reflecting it for others. This has an effect as well – lets feel this! And appreciate. I am sure this will bring a change into our daily choices. For it feels like my world is changing when I appreciate my effect on it. It is like saying YES to my power, what means: accepting it.

306. The way this was written ‘I used to push myself and my body really hard all my life….’ caused me to pause and consider how we do not just abuse our bodies, we can also bully ourselves emotionally on top of this. A combination of thoughts, reactions and especially bullying ourselves if we can’t live up to a standard we have bought into – how miserable we keep ourselves and it still all boils down to abuse in the body.

     1. I agree Deanne, and constantly trashing our body, not only results in a painful miserable physical existence, but we sabotage our ability to bring all of ourselves to every moment thus shutting down our awareness plus our ability to stay detached from life’s issues, so then we take stuff on that we can’t deal with and destroy ourselves even further, it doesn’t really make sense when seen this way.

        1. It is really horrific when you look at it like this Annie, and we are meant to be intelligent, what kind of intelligence do we really have that we live in such a way?

     2. Good call Deanne. We are masters of self-abuse in all forms – physical, emotional, psychological. No wonder we have a world in chaos: we have normalised it all and it is simply reflecting back to us what we live.

307. I relate to this experience Christina, and have even more ways I can dis-honour myself in similar situations; the times where I have said yes before I am aware the words are out of my mouth, the times when I feel “no” but say “yes” and the occasions when there is more time to consider my options are also interesting. Here I feel the tension of what I want to do and what is socially acceptable and what I know or sense the expectation is, sometimes I doubt and wonder if I have got it wrong and if I am the problem or being too precious, other times I think about the situation and come up with justifications for why I want to go against the grain. All of these considerations can also become distractions, waste time and is also how I use the ill ways of the world as a distraction to avoid getting on with it and taking the next practical step that a situation requires.

308. I have always been very gung ho when it comes to making decisions and often my body pays the price. I will justify decisions with the fact that the task had to be done and there is no time and who else is going to do it if I don’t. Your blog has opened me up to just how many reasons and excuses I use to escape making a decision that is about my body, its almost like I don’t want to come across to others as “a pansy” or “precious”. I know that sounds hard but these beliefs still run and I want to get them out of the closet and free myself. Its like I still champion being able to “just do it”, I still believe that not “just doing it” is being “soft” is a weakness and being able to do everything, makes you a powerhouse.
     Deep inside, I know its not true but its good to talk more about it and get rid of these niggling beliefs that hold us back from being all that we are naturally as women.

     1. I can relate to what you have said here Sarah, I think back to early sleep deprived days of mother hood where I could barely keep my eyes open and I felt I had to push through to get things done this ultimately was at the expense of my health but it didn’t manifest until many years later. I came from and married into a line of strong hardworking non nonsense very capable women, and had parenting that wanted all opportunities for daughters including work and gardening, and I loved doing these creative things,but it was missing the component of nurturing, even as a child I abandoned my body early being labelled a hypochondriac meant I shut up and got on with it.

        1. Thanks for sharing your story, it sounds like you very much understand the belief system I was talking about. How are you now days with cutting that attitude and surrendering as a woman?

        2. The push can come up but the more I have learned to stay connected to myself and the purpose it seems that the days organise themselves, and things get done where and when they needed.

        3. Beautiful!

     2. Dear Sarah, I love your honesty and nominating here! What I can say is, the true power I can express is not mine, it comes through me, but it is not from me. The moment I realize (and remember! 😉 ) this, the push inside me lets go, the desire ‘to be a powerhouse’ (and have an effect to the world) does melt. It is in fact the illusionary version of the truth which is: I have an effect on the world all of the time, with any choice I make and the pull of ‘what to do next’ is coming to me naturally when I let go of the push… It is the difference of ‘trying to control’ or ‘accepting my responsibility’.
        The moment I see that I ‘want to be…’ I know, I did not appreciate who I am and what I bring already. To appreciate is key!

        1. Yes, I agree with all you have shared here Sandra and so I want to go further with it. Its a pattern that has been running for so long that its going to take time to retrain myself. I worked a 14 1/2 hour day yesterday as we have just opened another cafe. We have nearly all female staff and by 8.00 last night I realised a big heavy plant was blocking us from closing the door….I just wanted to get home as I have no days off work until new staff are trained, everyone was busy so I just moved it.
           I get funny, protective over other woman having to lift something but its okay for me to do it?! It such crap and not true but II always make a reason why I ” I had to” do something.

        2. That’s a trick Sarah – the idea of arriving anywhere (home e.g.). ‘When’ or ‘where’ we arrive is not so important as ‘how’. In fact the HOW guarantees our way, where and when we arrive. If I abuse my body to be earlier at home, I bring this abusive energy into my home and to the people who live with me. I inspire others to abuse themselves as well…
           We are so powerful – every choice has an effect on us and others. The moment we see this truth and take responsibility about it by accepting & appreciating our power we open up the door for support as well. Because our power comes from a connection. The moment we choose to dis-connect, we have to do it all on our own…

        3. Great point Sandra, true power can only be accessed if we match the quality from which it came, box ticking looks good but it falls short. Its the means, not the ends….

     3. great insight Sarah, it can be a deeply entrenched image we have, that we have to be tough and independent to be worth something, or have to be this way to survive life.. but now I can see that this has just been destroying my body for no good reason, meaning both I and the rest of the world misses out on the truth I could otherwise live.

        1. Thanks for sharing Annie, very genuine, I can feel that this is what you have come to and that you understand how it feels on both sides – tough and surrendered.

309. It redefines our perception of abuse and normal. This is something we are doing to ourselves through the ignorance of not choosing to be aware. We cannot be a victim, we have to take ownership of our own lives and make different choices.

310. Normal almost scares me now because what we have accepted as normal is completely dysfunctional as a society, lovelessness and ill health, domestic violence are not right, loving or happy functional ways to exist so why do we accept them, let’s not normalise them we all deserve better.

     1. So true Nicole, I have a mistrust of normal for exactly the same reason! I want so much more love for myself and everyone else, this isn’t about living a great life in isolation, this is about us all becoming aware that there is so much more love to be, to live and to feel.

311. Accepting things as normal without assessing the actual quality, i.e. if it is truly loving or not, is a chosen blindness without an ounce of awareness of one´s blindness – the term ‘double blind study’ comes to mind.

312. “I can do it” are very significant words. Before I met Universal Medicine I thought the words were positive and encouraging and affirming of myself, but I have now learned how misleading they are, for they spring from the mind and my own need for self esteem in myself, and not from any feeling of what is true for me, guided by my body, as you say Christina. “Mind-Talk”, telling ourselves what to do to achieve, leads us into downward spirals of abuse of the body. Serge Benhayon’s teachings, and the example of living total self care in his life, refute the belief of many that the mind in control brings us success and confirmation for what we do, not who we are.

313. “..whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself” This is key and I subscribe it completely. Knowing this is an opportunity of taking responsibility of my feelings and my choices. The best reminder to honour what I feel and sustain love in my life.

314. Living love to the best of our ability exposes abuse and begins to deconfigure it.

315. I have been quite horrified at how many “normals”, that are actually self abusive, that I have lived with. It is taking a little time to re-configure them, a loving work in progress, but one that is not only very necessary but one that is making some huge and welcome changes in my life.

316. Thank you Christina a really beautiful and important blog. Honouring and listening to my body is a door to the most wonderful way to live and a deeply nourishing and magic door (or is it window) to my Soul and the truth of all things. This might have all sounded a bit crazy to me in the past when I didn’t listen to my body but since I have been listening to my body I find it crazy that I didn’t. Why would I abuse my body which is in fact my greatest friend?

317. If we were to make a list of all the things that we do and allow under the guise of ‘doing the right thing’ we would actually get to see that we are very self-abusive. The more self-abusive we are the more abusive we will be to others. No wonder humanity is in the state that it is. What you are describing here Christina is the way forward and that is to become very truthful about any sort of self-abuse that we allow into our lives and say NO to it.

318. Having a solid and true connection to the love we all hold within would bypass so many self abuse situations and experiences

319. “I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.” What love we must be to be given such reminders when we go off track. Listening and honouring our bodies is the only guaranteed way have to a truly successful life.

     1. Yes Samantha, it is great to begin to understand and appreciate the enormous love we are held in, that the seeming accidents that come our way, are actually the Soul’s way of arresting our wayward trajectory, and giving us the opportunity to stop the momentum that was steering us so far off course and allow ourselves a reset and a fresh start. Understanding and appreciating this would change everything.

320. Living in disconnection from our bodies creates an opening for abuse, as we seek recognition and identification with what we do we make life all about function and not about discerning the energy we are in, which only comes from living life from our bodies – honouring the sensitivity and delicateness within.

321. The hardened battle-scarred body is often seen as heroic to many, and that the punishment that is endured is a sign of manhood. From the observer that may seem the case, but the reality is very different. There are many contact sports that can claim this and in the short term, it appears that a person can get away with it, but long term it is a very different story with permanent damage to parts of the body requiring medications and surgery and in the case of knock outs, people are left with poor mental function especially as they get older.

322. There is something very powerful in your account Christina about knowing it was not right to jump and still doing it. It is almost like it brought a stronger response in your body afterwards and this leads to the understanding that with awareness comes greater responsibility.

323. ‘I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure. I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.
     I explored the possibility that my body knows everything (!) – when a rest is needed, which food it needs, which exercise, how often to go for a walk and how to walk more gently. How it senses the world and navigates me through life like a compass, through every mood that others are in and are communicating with.’ – this is great Christina.

     1. Agree Jenny, this is great. I’d like to spotlight the part “I began treating my body with …what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure.” To find out the difference here, from ‘what is needed’ and ‘what brings pleasure’ is alone worth a thousand studies…

324. Thank you for this great expose of something considered ‘safe’ being totally abusive to our body Christina – and what that truly does to us.

325. I also fall for the trap of ‘being reliable’, a ‘good team player’. Your words that jumped out at me were: “Why do I think I am not enough being me?” – definitely worth pondering.

     1. and for the team it would be the best to live in self-love, to reflect that to all and so inspire/support the love in others.

326. Your line – our bodies are our greatest gift is very powerful. They are our greatest gift yet how frequently do we abuse them? That extra snack, staying up too late, pushing to get that extra thing done … whilst these may be seen as mild behaviours in the grandness of the world, they are still against what our body may be saying and to the precious body that is abuse.

327. The independent warrior woman who can do it all without the help of anyone is something I know well and is also something society champions. I too have gone on a journey of listening to the truth of my body and I have discovered my tenderness, my sweetness and how delicate I am – all at the same time as discovering what a powerful woman I am in the true sense of power. This is not something society generally champions and so getting on this path can be a challenge. I too was supported by Serge Benhayon to get myself on this path and here where I am today.

328. “Making it right” or worse still, “doing the right right by someone or a group of people” – what a perfect set-up for abandoning how we truly feel and what is true for our body.

     1. Indeed Gabriele – however, there is such a strong invisible pull to act in such a way as to not court the reactions or disapproval of others. We need to break through this barrier – aka the need to please, be liked and not rock the boat in order to be able to truly honour ourselves in situations such as Chrisitina describes here.

329. It is interesting to note that our brains make up only 2% of our body weight and yet we let them make all the decisions! – it is only a small part or proportion of our whole body. The rest of our body has an amazing intelligence when we allow it to be and connect with it.

     1. We let the brain think it is in charge, when the body is actually in charge… we just sometimes need to re-feel who the boss is.

330. For me doing something that brings the reward, recognition, pleasure or relief is often something that satisfies my mind but can be at the expense of my body. I am still learning how to honour my body and put it always first rather than the demands of my mind – it is a completely different way to live but one that has definitely resulted in greater contentment and vitality and joy which feels so much grander than pleasure and recognition.

331. “I learned to stop acting from my mind and I began treating my body with respect, nurturing it with what it needs, instead of what brings the greatest pleasure.” Shifting from ‘what brings the greatest pleasure’ to what the body ‘needs’ is such a game changer to how one lives and relates with other people and the world. Not only is one healthier but life becomes so much meaningful.

332. Let me ponder on how often I am asked to ‘jump of a roof’ in my day, in a sense… Be it the automatic smile I give to a stranger in a shop to show that I am friendly or pushing to the traffic to be in time for my meeting – I am ‘nice’ in so many ways. All for an outcome. All to control. And I found myself with the idea to control even this habits and dissect all choices and the way I live, instead of just feeling how it is to live in that way, to make this choices. To allow myself to feel again, or to become aware again of how I feel with my choices is so revolutionary. Such a simple choice – and how profound!
     Very well done Christina and thank you for the inspiration!

333. The problem with youth is we have a body that is in the best shape it will ever be… and we attempt to push it to its limit and beyond. Anything you abuse always has a cost. A candle lit at both ends burns twice as bright only lasts half as long.

     1. I used to think the same – that I misspent the best years of my life wasting myself and abusing the body of my dreams. But, this image has totally changed for me as I’m seeing that the body is a direct reflection of my choices, so as my choices becoming more loving, so to does my body become lighter.

334. “Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal.”

     We don’t like to hear words of truth and love because they resonate with every pore of our being and therein expose what is being lived that is not of this exquisite beauty…the beauty we are birthed forth with. It is this beauty that is our true norm and not the mess we live that we call normal by virtue of the fact that is what the majority choose to live.

     1. True Lianne, this acceptance that ‘not to be love’ is normal (ie. our rejection of being innately love) explains the reason for the mess humanity finds itself in.

     2. The words of truth and love can rock us out of our comfort. That jolt can seem very unloving but it is true love when we expose another for not living the love they truly are.

     3. Agreed, and there is a time when one is ready to hear the truth again, and it resonates so beautiful inside that tears of joy are shed. A reminder of who we are and once forgot, yet can live again.

335. Our bodies do know everything for we are the living cells of God and as such the map of the Universe is held within our physicality. All we need do is remain connected with our bodies and not let the mind march off on its own course with its ‘eyes’ fixed firmly on a future point and unwilling to see the chaos it causes in doing so. The mind that has not yet been brought into harmony with the movements of the body will seek to run in constant motion lest we stop and feel in genuine stillness, the everything we truly are.

     1. “The map of the universe is held within our physicality” – when we embrace this, abuse of any kind to our body would cease.

336. Great blog Christina and one that helps us to return to the simple truth that our bodies are our friend and not foe. By living in separation to our physical forms we have denied the fact that they are vehicles for divine expression and instead use them as vehicles for earthly pleasure that do naught to arrest the reckless and wayward momentum we are currently caught up in and that any health and disease statistic from our modern world will confirm. By making the choice to honour what our physicality is communicating to us, we make the choice to end the war that has kept us so divided, from ourselves and from each other. True harmony is found in living the love we are through these forms of flesh and in so doing reinstate Heaven ‘s light on Earth. The Son returns when he realises that the light of the burning sun lies within and it is this that helps light the world and saves himself and thus humankind from the shadows we have created and chosen to dwell in for so long.

337. From young we are taught that recognition comes from our doing, and as women we are very good at this, we would do anything and everything to be loved. We cannot just stop doing and suddenly start appreciating ourselves for the amazingness that we simply are. What actually bridges this gap? It is movement with quality. And what quality is that? When we stop and connect back with ourselves, we begin to feel this quality of stillness within us, and it is a quality that we know is precious. If we are honest, it is worth more than any recognition that the outside world has given us. When we begin moving with this quality, steadily we discover that more and more of our movements become this quality and so we will move deeper into this quality, and the doing for recognition naturally drops away.

338. What came to me when reading and feeling your words Christina, was that the particles that make up our bodies are divine. This is not an original thought, as none are, but in it there was for me a depth of understanding about going against my body contributes to holding myself and everyone in an existence which has allowed normal to be harming and destructive. It is the ultimate responsibility to live connected to and listening to the divinity within us.

     1. We are indeed made of divine particles yet we do not walk in this knowledge.

     2. So much that we let into the body is harming and destructive Simon, no wonder it can be difficult to listen when all it does is hold us back like an anchor on the sea bed.

339. When there is a flow in movement of a quality that confirms our own love, anything that breaks this flow is abuse.

     1. I only can agree Adele and to feel this kind of abuse is instant and it can help to stop and to give space to feel what we have done to loose this flow of movement.

340. As women our lack of self worth can drive us in many different ways e.g. fixing everything and everyone so then we are ok, being perfect, proving we are just as good as a man/a certain person, etc…but at the end of the day it is all about the ‘doing’, what we have achieved and done, rather than all about the ‘being’ – the quality of how we are in whatever it is we are doing. This quality, or way of being true love, is vastly more important in the world than anything we will ever do.

     1. I agree Paula and from my experience it is similar for men. I know for me I have often not taken responsibly for the quality of my being and deep down I know this, so I have compensated by doing more and more, believing perhaps if I do enough that people like enough it will be enough! But it is never enough because there will always be a lack, an uneasiness because I am not being me in what I am doing. Truly meeting and loving ourselves and expressing that to the world is so vital for true health and wellbeing.

        1. You are so right Andrew, the more we try to be more… the lesser we feel about ourselves and this just perpetuates a downward spiral away from who we truly are.

     2. Paula, I have come to the same understanding, “This quality, or way of being.., is vastly more important in the world than anything we will ever do.” I know just how much abuse I put my body in, “in the act of doing”…I harden and constrict, but when I carry out tasks in a tender quality my body feels completely different. It opens up and feels like it can breathe.

        1. I agree rachelmurtagh1 that we can actually feel the quality of our being in our body, and I have felt a similar feeling of tightness, hardness and contraction when I do something in an energy that is not from who I am. I am slowly re-awakening this awareness to really feel the difference in how my body feels depending on which energy I am choosing to be in at that time.

341. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” How true, and how key to develop a loving and nurturing relationship with our bodies so we can honour its natural wisdom and not override the messages we are receiving 24/7.

342. I broke my leg a year ago today and the bone repaired very quickly but the healing is still ongoing and a reminder that it’s all about the choices we make that either heal or harm. If harming they will inevitably need to be cleared so choosing the quality we want is a self loving choice that builds a body of love. This is my new ‘normal’.

343. The extent of abuse in the world is being exposed more and more as it comes out in the media globally and daily…however abuse starts with each one of us and the responsibility we have in every choice we make. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” Anything other than true love is abuse.

344. This is very inspiring to read Christina…love the openness and honesty you share here. And what this exposes is that there is no perfection – we can go back into old patterns or expose more layers of the same pattern, but there is no perfection in life. We all have our own unique ways and path in evolution.

345. “Nowhere else outside of Universal Medicine was I ever reflected this truth before, to which my inner heart responds without doubt.” This is beautiful Christina and it is true the inner heart just knows and there is no need to question it because it is felt deep within and cannot be denied.

     1. There is no denying how incredible Universal Medicine is, with you all the way on this one Alison.

        1. The proof is in the pudding – we are here as living proof that stopping the self-abuse goes hand in hand with developing self-love.

346. “Even though there is a lot of illusion around what is normal, there is a way of reconfiguring the ‘normal’ to stop the constant abuse we are all in. The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.”

     Great call Christina. We are to awaken from the blinding light of the illusion we have accepted as normal and realize that we are here for a one unified humanity. As a reality, not a fantasy.

347. “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body…”

     Indeed, living with a level of confidence in one’s own body, allows one to speak what and when is needed rather than being dictated to by the perceived needs of others. This may appear ‘anti-social’ and potentially offend, momentarily, but truth is always for the benefit of all, freeing us all to act what is true, not what is nice.

     1. The more I have allowed that natural sensitivity and awareness to be there (which we all have when we are young children) the more I am feeling that dishonouring myself or not being myself while having a conversation with someone has as big an impact on my body as jumping off a roof. There is so much going on energetically that we do not pay enough attention to because we cannot see it, touch it, smell it, hear it etc.

348. The body will eventually show us what we can no longer continue with. As we build a level of love and care, the body speaks louder as in your case Christina, where this jump will be the last. You will no longer be able to say yes to such a proposition; it won’t be a choice but rather a necessity.

     1. I like it that our bodies will eventually show us what we can no longer continue with emmadanchin but most of the people do not like that. They like it to function as this is how the world showed them to be. To see the beauty in our bodies is something to re-discover more and more.

        1. And nor did I like it Ester, because we don’t like to be shaken from our familiar comfort; even if that comfort is not at all comforting but rather confirming of the protection we are in. When we are honest about this and allow ourselves to really feel again, then, there is no longer a choice because what we were so afraid of feeling is in fact the best feeling ever.

349. “I learned to shift my behaviors from choosing what was cool to have, fancy to be, or yummy to eat, into: feel first what to eat, which words are truly needed to say, and what I am really to do, and that being connected with my body is the real deal!”

     This is an awesome paragraph describing the shift I have equally felt in myself. At first it felt impossible to withdraw from seeking fancy, cool or yummy … slowly but surely, I have seen through the illusion and am now able to rely on my body to guide me. It is incredibly freeing to live this way, not relying out any outside source and now, I am feeling a whole new layer opening up, offering me a dedication and appreciation of the quality of delicateness that is innately me.

350. This is great blog Christine, jam packed with incredible realisations and wisdom, but today this point really speaks to me, for it is a place I have recently arrived at myself – “I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.” And that means any-thing! Like sitting in an uncomfortable position without adjusting yourself, staying up later than your body wants too, over-eating … anything.

351. I was in a situation yesterday where we had some heavy things to lift at work, I was mid-way through carrying them up the stairs when your blog came to my mind and I realised ‘just because I can, it doesn’t mean I should’ I decided that more trips was better for my body than fewer trips with heavier load.

     1. The beauty of inspiration and reflection. That’s the way we lift each other up (the stairs to heaven 😉 ). Lovely!

     2. Awesome Lucy that is the true meaning of the livingness, as you did not just take this blog as knowledge in your mind but made it a body memory and actioned a change based on a connection to your body, very inspiring.

352. Accepting and appreciating that our body is sensitive and asking what it really needs is key in stopping the abuse.

     1. Acceptance of sensitivity is an important step, as is recognising that being sensitive is powerful, and not a weakness.

        1. Sensitivity is understated and can be seen as a sign of weakness when in fact it is a great asset.

353. A great blog Christina and thank you for sharing. What is so interesting is how you have made such great lifestyle changes and yet can be caught in the doing something that is abuse to your body. I agree that it does not matter if it is us jumping off a roof or being nice – both harm and our body lets us know loud and clear how horrible it feels.
     The truth is we get away with nothing and even if we think we are doing great in the self-care, self-love departments there is always more and we do get caught out.
     The great thing is we learn and sharing as you have done shows we are here to keep learning and perfection is not on the radar.

     1. I like your comment Bina. I know I slip up, but using the body as a marker or a responder to what feels right or what feels horrible is the greatest way to learn, the messages are loud and clear if we want to listen.

354. This is awesome Christina – this we all need, the reflection saying that it’s ok to say no when it doesn’t feel ok rather than overriding it just because it ‘needs to be done’. I think you will revolutionize the whole acting industry just by being yourself and standing in that light, and I’m not talking about the electrical lights here… : )

355. ‘to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine’

     Every time I stop to refuel my car I stop and pause to double check I’ve got the correct fuel. Many years ago I wasn’t paying attention and didn’t read the fuel type on the pump but went by the colour so put petrol into my diesel. It wasn’t until I was paying that my mistake was pointed out. It cost me money to have the fuel filtered out just like how it costs our body energy if we let in the wrong energy and even more energy or even complete ruin if we run it with what isn’t love.

     Do I check what energy I run my body with as I move or do I only pay attention when it runs down to a stop?

     1. Very good point Karin – do I make it about love or do I wait till I get the feedback of not-love? Do I wait for the ‘ouch’ or do I choose love of my own free will? I could be ahead but choose so often to delay…while the result is a set up anyway. We are love and will come back to this state of being and expressing one day. Why defending any longer? Makes no sense. But we are quite good in ‘no senses’ acting…till we choose to take responsibility.

356. So often dramatic incidents, such as an accident, a life threatening disease, a devastation stop us in our tracks, and afterwards we find something has profoundly shifted. Of course many of us fight this shift and proudly drag ourself back to the old way. But many of us do feel the blessing the shift offers. How much wiser would it be if we recognised the wisdom available to us all the time, not just in these incidents, but also on a minute by minute basis via life and through our bodies – and all we need to is pay more attention.

357. Sometimes, the learning is easy, sometimes, we need deeper reminding…all of the time the way we can beat ourselves up, can become a bigger abuse than the original choice.

     1. Yes Joel, it IS always a choice, do we self indulge in further abuse or do we bring a loving understanding to ourselves and take the next step with that awareness?

        1. It’s true Victoria, we can use it to look for how much we are wrong and not worthy or allow it to guide us back to the part we stepped away from…the choice to step away is the learning, the part we stepped away from is the gold…

     2. Absolutely Joel…when we are hurt as children we often make a simple choice, the many and varied consequences of which then plays out in heaps of different ways every day throughout our entire lives – that is huge abuse of ourselves!

     3. The self-bashing is an old friend for many, but as you say it can become a self-abusive indulgence.

358. Thanks Christina for your great sharing. I’m pretty sure, that I would have jumped from the roof as well and you are so right, when you are saying: “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking.” No matter what we are doing, the moment we do something against our body it is abuse. It is so important not to compromise with our body and to feel first, before we do something. Your blog is a great reminder, that the body always comes first.

359. Yes Christina your blog reminds me of a quote I have on my wall “If it’s not Love why choose it” which is such a basic question … If only we remember to ask ourselves!

360. Abuse shows itself in so many ways and most of these ways, we have labeled as normal. Take for instance going to bed late while your body is letting you know it is tired. Most of us do this and it is seen as normal, but is is a form of self-abuse. The list is endless….

361. I realized that being liked by others is something for me to nominate which stops me at times from honoring my connection to myself first and the want to please others. My practitioner shared with me yesterday ” you don’t have to like me, we are already brothers” .This means, as we are all energetically connected and equal Sons of God and therefore brothers, to get recognition and acceptance from another is not what it is truly about once we remember who we truly are. Beautiful.

     1. Leaving myself to please another has been a tactic I have used to cruise and hide through life – but as Christina shared it is another form of self-abuse that feels ‘horrible’. It is easy to not need to be liked when we know ourselves from our essence, then the understanding is also there if another is challenged by what we reflect. That makes it worth knowing ourselves from our essence doesn’t it?

362. “I am strong, I can do that, and I’ll make it without any help.” Trying to show how independent I was as a woman, somehow trying to prove that “I can do it!” I could of written these lines myself, I can very much relate to what you have shared here Christina. Unfortunately (or fortunately??) for me it took a serious illness for me to stop and look at this attitude that I was holding and to open myself up to being vulnerable. Interestingly enough I have found that within the vulnerability there is so much strength and within that strength I no longer have the “I can do it all attitude” but allow myself to be the delicate woman that I am.

     1. Yes Donna, we have forgotten that it takes immense strength (and fragility and love) to say “no”.

        1. It is a muscle that I continue to work on, to be vulnerable, and to lovingly say no to that which is not true for me.

        2. I’m still working on that muscle also 😉

     2. Unfortunately Donna the statistics are showing that you are not alone and it is only going to get worse with more beautiful, tender souls needing a larger stop in their lives to make different choices. Perhaps it won’t be cancer, but obesity and type II diabetes are very serious illness we can do something about.

363. It’s interesting how the head can convince us we’re having fun but the body sends us a completely different message. I can still be tricked by the head occasionally but I can now feel the tension when the head and the body are giving me conflicting messages. And I know which one has the truth.. the body is always the one to listen to.

364. Roslyn not only do so many women have their self worth tied up in being as tough as a man but we actively shun the idea of being gentle as women, believing that it is old fashioned and weak. Little do most realise that they are shunning the very quality that gives them strength.

     1. So true Alexis, it is indeed our gentleness and our fragility that is our greatest strength. It took me quite some time to let go of the idea that fragility was weakness – I now know that it takes great strength to allow yourself to be vulnerable.

365. I couldn’t help but feel how our awareness needs to be in every moment, or should I say every movement, in order to stop abuse within ourselves.

     1. Absolutely Kim, every movement can be to a flow that is in line with the natural order of the universe, or it can go against the grain. When we go against this order, it is abuse.

     2. This is exactly the reminder I need to feel this morning. Be it jumping off a roof or doing any task, if we aren’t lovingly with and supporting our bodies in each moment of movement then our bodies feel the disregard and very quickly it becomes abuse – i.e. feeling like a physical assault.

        1. So true Sandra, I can easily relate to that feeling of “physical assault” in my body when I do anything that is disregarding and not supportive to its preciousness. A wonderful reminder to take into each and every day.

     3. Thats a great correction -in every movement, as it brings more tangible response-ability to me.

        1. Absolutely Simon, it brings it back to how simple change can be and where it starts from; movement.

366. Yesterday I experienced how pushing my body leads to a chain of pushing my body more. If I push my body to stay awake at night, I then have to push it in the morning to wake up earlier than its natural rhythm, then have to push it to eat something to get going although it wouldn’t want food and instead rest more etc. etc. Sometimes these chains of pushing can lead to an accident to be stopped. The forced “push” is externalized then!

     1. Absolutely! It is a hamster wheel once it feels started and all too often needs an accident to stop the momentum.

     2. Yes Felix, you have really exposed the cycle we can get ourselves caught up in with a single choice to push our bodies, each choice thereafter comes as a way of medicating or dealing with affects of the first. But if we stop and acknowledge the push that was there in the first choice, and accept the affect that this has on the body, we can break that chain or cycle of reactions and come back to taking tender care of ourselves from that point.

     3. It makes sense because feeling how tired we are is just so unpleasant, yet stopping and listening to that tiredness and responding to it is the only way. It sounds so obvious, yet few of us do it to a level that we are truly vital.

367. ‘I explored the possibility that my body knows everything’, a priceless bit of knowledge shared here Christina. If we keep playful and curious with our living it’s incredible what we may find.

     1. We are universal beings and our bodies know order. When we go outside this order our bodies show us loud and clear.

368. Christina your blog is like an evolutionary love bomb. It takes one from the beginning of when we start to feel how we abuse ourselves and have classed this behavior as being normal, to the very end when one realises that unless we live the all that we are, we are living a life of abuse in every action that goes against our natural way. This is a massive revelation to feel, it shakes up our every movement.

     1. I agree Kim, this is enormous and something that I can see how and why we avoid feeling it, however our own pull to want to live the truth that we are will and is always showing us the way.

        1. Beautifully said aminatumi, such is the beauty of love, it a magnet with an incredible pull.

     2. And the circle never stops, where the tenderness, love and care we are with ourselves continues to deepen.

        1. The difference between a line and a circle Heather but the circle is ever deepening.

369. I’m finding that the more gentler I am with myself, the more tender I have to be and any little self abuse is very quick to show itself. This really does show me the preciousness of our bodies even though the body can take so much punishment if we choose to do that to it. It is so amazing to be aware of the choice we have to be gentle and tender instead of being stuck in some old ideal or belief that we have to push ourselves to the limit.

     1. True kevmchardy, we have to make the choice to be aware first don’t we. I could quite easily have remained aware of nothing and been pushing myself to exhaustion to get all I need to get done, done. I am forever appreciating the choice I choose to be aware of and the choices that I make more often than not, as well as deep appreciation for the man who brought this awareness to the fore.

        1. I agree Lucy ‘ we have to make the choice to be aware first don’t we’. Without self awareness we’re lost. With it, there is no hiding place, we feel each choice and live with the consequences. Choosing love and connecting to the tender beings that we are is an unfolding journey and like you I owe this level of awareness to Serge Benhayon and teachings of The Way of the Livingness.

        2. ‘we have to make the choice to be aware first don’t we’, yes we do, Lucy. If we choose to be unaware, to turn a blind eye to our ‘responsibility’, we will receive little reminders, maybe just bumping into something, knocking something over, dropping a cup on the floor, if that’s not enough to bring us back, a burn from the kettle and so the nudges continue, sometimes until we are forced to stop and consider just how we are choosing to live. I can remember days when I’ve felt I had the worst possible ‘luck’, when in fact I was being given so many opportunities to stop and be aware of how I was going about my day to prevent me from having an accident. That’s the level of love and support that we are being offered every moment of every day, how divine.

        3. Yes! And how often I have just swept over them! I noticed moments like this in the last week, I turned the water on and it gushed out, I opened a door and it flew back, so many little moments that I was surprised at but didn’t quite address…now I have a cold and I can feel the rush that got into my body that I chose to ignore. It is poison and my body loved me so much it physically gave me a louder stop that the rushing water and flying door clearly did not achieve!

        4. True, we have to choose to be aware first, and so important to appreciate this, and appreciate as we choose to deepen our awareness and make new choices.

     2. That is such beautiful statement to read from a solid man like you kevmchardy. I know we haven’t met but reading your blog and comments you seem like a strong man with an extremely gentle and loving approach to relationship and life. Very refreshing to read.

     3. Thank you Kevin, Life has definitely been turned on its head when we can say it is normal to be “gentle and tender” and this is now our not limited for our ‘tenderness’ is forever expanding! The so called normal held us back in every area of our lives, thank you Serge Benhayon for sharing that, which is the tenderness, love and responsibility, those choices so we can be true to our divine connection.

370. “Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal” – and it is so because ‘normal’ is often what the majority have agreed to put up with, and not out of willing choice. Maybe no one wants to do that ‘normal’ anyway.

     1. It is confronting to nominate our behaviours as abuse. It makes me realise that I abuse my body and myself more than I experience abuse from another. This can be through physical actions like overeating, staying up late or even allowing thoughts that I am not good enough, being really hard on myself etc. We don’t like to accept abuse from others yet many of us live in constant self-abuse and accept it as normal. This may be the norm for us, but it isn’t normal.

     2. The concept of normal has to be thrown away, or at least outed for the misnomer that it is.

371. An absolutely awesome post Christina and a gift for me to read today. “The only truthful ‘making it right’ is to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine. No more, or less.” This one line says so much. I can see that there is in fact no ‘right’, only choices and consequences that my body has to deal with. The choice to choose love or not comes before every other choice. I can eat a salad from a place of disregard or do the same thing from love with 2 very different consequences for my body.

     1. True Leonne, ‘there is in fact no ‘right’, only choices and consequences that my body has to deal with.’ If we applied this premise to everything we do and made it the forefront of our thinking we would end up with very different health results. Considering the same action can be carried out with regard or disregard, like eating salad, where one can be nourishing and the other can cause bloating we have to seriously consider what our approach to everything is. By living with self-regard we can cease the constant battering we put our bodies through on a moment-by-moment basis.

     2. Thank you for highlighting that bit Leonne, I will hold that with me today.

     3. How wise are your words Leonne. You’re sharing so much in your paragraph as well… It’s not about what we do, but how we do it. This is for everything. Are we connected with ourselves – our heart and our body? Are we the ones choosing or are we ‘doing life’, regardless if we’re the ones choosing or not. There’s much honesty required to discern when we are with ourselves and when not. Before this honesty comes along, there’s no freedom to be found and life is actually in full control. Of course, we might fight this to the hill or completely deny it, but this will not take away the fact that there’s a choice to be made to be connected or not. No pill, no hobby, no desire, no passion can do (!!!) it for us, it has to come from us, from our – God given – free will.

     4. Thank you Leonne, your comment really cracked through something for me – “I can see that there is in fact no ‘right’, only choices and consequences that my body has to deal with. The choice to choose love or not comes before every other choice.” There is such a freedom in letting go of the pressure and restrictions that come with “getting it right” and instead simply making it about choice and consequence, love or not love.

        1. Thank you Leonne and Hannah, it is so simplistic in essence and a superb reminder to carry through the day, love or not love, choice and consequence, essential education for everyone in our daily lives.

        2. Beautifully said Rowena, it is often the simplest things that stick with us and provide the deepest support.

        3. So true, being ‘right’ is part of the striving and achieving and has a marker outside our bodies. In fact our bodies let us know, they are the only marker we need. However, taking time to build a body that we can listen to, that is something worth taking time for. It is a gift from heaven in every moment in every footstep we take.

        4. Super beautiful and super important point Lucy – it is absolutely worth “taking time to build a body that we can listen to” – for our bodies communicate to us all we need to know.

     5. ‘Right’ can never win, because there is always a ‘wrong’ and there is no Truth in either.

        1. Ahh Kylie Jackson, you are the queen of powerful one-liners that cut straight to the truth – beautifully expressed 🙂

     6. Love it, if we all had this attitude we would be living in a very different world, when we make life about responsibility in our choices like this, you can feel how empowered and clean it is. No blame and no games are the way forward.

372. Christina the powerful message that comes through your blog about abuse being anything that we do against ourselves and our knowing is huge and greatly important for everyone. I love that our bodies speak so loudly and clearly to us and yes we don’t get off lightly when we do abuse them to a point where they need to hurt and have the space to correct themselves and however long that takes its our responsibility to feel this and return to nurturing and honouring ourselves as soon as we choose to.

373. Christina this is a very intimate blog about your relationship with the body and how much the body shows how we are living if we allow ourselves to feel it. It actually is a marker of truth

     1. It absolutely is Karoline. Just recently somebody shared their experience of running and how amazing it felt while they ran, and how running was more about the mind than the body. But this same person has issues with their joints. And so, could it be the mind might get off on the run, but the body says that it isn’t so great with aches and pains post-run?

        1. I use to run and get off on it, as if there was some kind of pride in being able to, literally, run my body in that particular way. There is something about running that makes the runner feel powerful and gives a false sense of control: the mind being a master of the body rather than the mind being a servant to the body. Shine a light on this though and we have to ask how intelligent is it to ignore the intelligence of the body and from the mind decide to keep running a body with joint issues and post-run pain?

        2. What I’ve observed Deanne, is that the choices made prior to running are the ones that separate the person from feeling what’s going on in their body, to enable them to then choose to run. I’ve observed a high coffee and sugar consumption in people I know who run, cycle or exercise in a way that pushes the body…and from experience, these substances stimulate the body significantly, and so pushing it hard with exercise is another level of stimulation, and like sugar, the effects of it are felt later.

     2. It is a very intimate blog and I am appreciating your honest sharing Christina, as it is supportive to me and many others.

374. This is a great wakeup call for all women, to recognise that our worth is not tied up in what we can do physically to match a man, or just to prove we can do it. Instead we need to be loving and respectful of our bodies and their limitations. Our bodies can suffer serious trauma while we are ignoring it and pushing through when we need to listen to it. Thank you Christina for a great blog.

     1. I agree, Roslyn, we can be so determined in our heads to be independent of everyone and capable of doing everything, we forget the delicate nature of our bodies and the need to be tender.

        1. Yes, it is as if we have been fighting for independence and equality so much we have taken it to mean something it doesn’t. This battle has caused great harm to our bodies. We have the power now to undo that harshness and bring back tenderness without being valued any less, in my experience the value is more because I am not forcing anything, I am just being.

        2. Yes Carmel, and this independence and capable state only serves to separate and divide people in the competitive nature it encourages.

        3. We most certainly wouldn’t deliberately crush a delicate flower – because we appreciate it’s exquisite beauty. And so, perhaps the answer here lay in the fact that as women we are not deeply appreciating the divine qualities we hold, and thus can crush, push, harden, and pummel our delicate bodies, without batting an eyelid.

        4. This is so true Carmel. I have lived a life of being ‘independant’, and appearing to be coping and capable of doing everything for myself, but in the process pushed people away. It is to our own detriment that we live in this way and override the ‘delicate nature of our bodies’ and our own innate tenderness.

     2. I agree Roslyn…as women (and men) we can get so caught up in being recognised and or valued for what we do, rather than just being who we naturally are.

     3. We truly have funny ways of being when women believe that proving they are as physically strong as men is beating them (men) at their own game, furthermore using this as a benchmark of what it is to be a woman – golly. It is like we need to state that a woman is not weak if she is not physically strong – it sounds silly but we need to be prepared to say it how it is, hold firm in this and be an unwavering reflection for others.

     4. Absolutely Roslyn – a lot of women have tied their worth to their ability to ‘be successful’, and in some cases this means to them what they can do to match men in their field of work or living. Isn’t it crazy that instead of focusing on being women, looking after ourselves and considering what feels right for ourselves and our bodies in each situation, many of us are spending a lot of our lives trying to ‘match’ men and be more like the other gender.

     5. Totally agree with you Roslyn – it’s time we appreciated the inherent differences between men and women and that as women we learn to accept how truly delicate we are and stop trying to outdo the men.

375. Thank you for this great sharing Christina. I have many times abandoned my body and disregarded its communication in an attempt to fulfil an ideal of what I thought I should do. As I deepen my connection with me it has been quite confronting to have the awareness of the self-abusive cycle I was in – I very much believe it is love or it is not – abuse lies underneath many veils.

     1. The same has occurred for me as well Shelly, it is amazing how prevalent abuse is in our day to day activities, essentially anything that is not from and with love is abuse.

        1. Well said James. “..anything that is not from and with love is abuse.” That is a different definition that is sometimes hard to swallow.

        2. It’s interesting as it is hard to swallow, yet we know when someone speaks to us in a way which is not from love it has a tendency to make our bodies go hard and tight along with a feeling of anxiousness or raciness – at least it has for me. So the more I see and observe it in the way others are with me the more I catch myself when I am like that with others – as anything less than honouring ourselves and another person as the depth of the love that they are is abuse.

        3. And we need to be living that Love. Love is word that slips easily off the tongue but may not offer true Love at all.

        4. I fully agree Jenny, without someone actually living love then saying I love you does not carry any body feeling of love with it. Just seeing my wife move with love confirms to me the love we have and no words are needed. In the past I love you or words to that effect have been used to make up after a disagreement rather than to deepen the love we have already established.

        5. The definition of self-abuse changes as we develop our own love, care and nurturing. I know what used to be “having a reward” like eating chocolate ice cream is now self-abuse.

        6. It sure does Heather, things I used to do which I would consider ‘normal’ I now see as abuse to my body .And I know there are things I do which are not loving and some are love. If we are love, which I know we all are, then anything even the slightest deviation away from love is not natural and is abuse. Of course we are in a plane of life where we are not designed to be perfect so no beating ourselves up when we have an unloving moment or two

        7. James I agree it is a fact that anything less than love is abuse. Once we become aware of it we also need to develop our levels of understanding and acceptance because another fact is that we currently live in a world where expressing in true love is not the normal way yet but The Way that we are all being pulled back to. As we become aware of the levels of abuse being expressed across the board, there is a stage where we are tempted to judge ourselves and others for this, but imposition and judgement is in itself abusive.

        8. A great point Nicola and one we all need to remember – there is no perfection sought and no one has the right to judge anyone no matter what decision they make. After all we have mostly all been there and done that so it would be hypocritical to judge however tempting it may be.

        9. Very true Heather, it is a personal development which shows why we should never judge or compare with another. For example, for one person it may be very self-loving to have a glass of orange instead of a glass of whiskey whereas for another having a glass of orange juice would be too sweet and therefore abusive.

        10. Spot on Nicola and well said – it takes judgement out of the window. We are all where we are to learn whatever we need to learn.

     2. I agree Shelly, and it is these layers (Veils) that really need to be brought to the surface and fully healed inside and out.

        1. ‘The definition of self-abuse changes as we develop our own love, care and nurturing. ‘ … beautifully said, Heather. I was sharing a meal with others whilst feeling attacked by the energy, without a word being spoken and I chose not to speak out to address the energy.
           That’s abuse, I was just as culpable, more so actually as I was possibly the only one to truly feel what was actually going on, energetically. If I’d chosen to speak out, it would have given everyone the opportunity to stop and feel the truth of what was being presented for themselves, creating a marker for future reference.

     3. When trying to meet an expectation or an ideal, the first thing we do is abandon our bodies and look to exterior influences and images to grasp a method of living that will achieve the ideal. I wonder what it would look like if when we were presented with thoughts and beliefs about something, our first move was to check IN with out bodies (not check OUT), and evaluate whether the belief feels true, supportive and right for us or if we should not engage with it as it feels false.

        1. Good point,It is not how we seem to operate Susie, checking in with our body is something that was presented to me once I became a student of Universal Medicine.

        2. Susie W you have a way of writing and saying things that brings clarity and also joins the dots together to understand how two things are related. Take this line for example’ When trying to meet an expectation or an ideal, the first thing we do is abandon our bodies and look to exterior influences and images to grasp a method of living that will achieve the ideal.’ It shows me how our ideals can pull the strings to determine how we move (live)unless we bring a consistent and known quality to the way that we live, otherwise we are pulled and this is quite literally how it can feel in my body. There is a way of living that encompasses me, I am part of the movement and a part of the life, the other way I am puppeted, it feels like the strings are beings pulled to make my body move. It also brings a lot of weight to what Serge Benhayon means we he recommends people develop a quality that is consistently true.

     4. It is so true. We think that abuse only comes from outside, but in fact we self abuse every time what we do or say to ourselves does not come with the exquisite tenderness of love. This doesn’t mean everything we say is namby pamby, and we suddenly have to do everything slowly, it means we start to notice how little care and regard we have had for ourselves. And choose to consider how to bring the tenderness of how we would treat a baby to ourselves as adults. Feeling this tenderness from ourselves to ourselves changes our perception of abuse which means we can be more aware of how we are with others.

        1. No namby pamby here Lucy, just a normal working woman learning that self-love is indeed possible in everyday life.

        2. Beautifully said, Lucy, …. I have been in so much disregard that I actually had to visualise bathing a baby when I took a shower, to allow myself to use the same tenderness on my own body. It shocks me to even write these words, but it’s true. Now I can appreciate how incredibly abusive that hardness was, for so many years. There are layers upon layers enveloping us and the more we allow ourselves to feel the exquisite tenderness that we are, to appreciate the love that we are in our every movement, we gently remove these layers.

        3. So true Alison, they are layers upon layers and I wonder if our usual need to get to the end of something precludes us from deepening that connection with tenderness for a time. It certainly has with me. The more I have let go of needing to achieve tenderness the more I have discovered the pull to be more tender in so many little moments.

        4. Yes Lucy, bringing the tenderness to ourselves as adults, of how we would treat a baby is such a great place to start, and it does bring an exquisiteness which we may not have felt before, which does indeed highlight how much self abuse we have allowed in the past. This has been a revelation for me.

376. Thank you Christina, I agree, as a man my life before Serge Benhayon was all about I could handle anything and not needing anyone. So in my case you can easily replace the word man for woman in your statement below!
     “All because I’ve always wanted to be that little step ahead, to be seen as the woman who can do it all… independent, not needing anyone, being respected because I could handle anything.
     As I know today, this is a condition many women have been trapped in for their whole lives.”
     How lost I was to be in the illusion that I was anything less than love. That tender little boy got lost in all the wanting “to be that little step ahead,” instead of allowing love. To me society showed me a life that was all about survival of the fittest, with a push and a drive to be a “step ahead.”

     1. Thank you Greg, having known you for a while now I can say that the world cannot do without your natural tender living way and it would be a crime if this was the case. It is great that you have and continue to bring yourself back to your truly natural state of being.

     2. What an immense lie that is Greg, that life is “all about survival of the fittest” when in truth it is about returning to and expressing the immensely loving tender beings we are. Our societies are so geared up to this lie that re-claiming our innate love can be quite a challenge, as evidenced by Christina’s choice to jump. It takes time to take our foot off the accelerator but thank goodness for Serge Benhayon for showing that life is not about living it at breakneck speed or driving over the edge, but ensuring we remain connected to our love at all times and honouring our own rhythm and fragility in all we do.

        1. It’s interesting what you share Rowena, ‘It takes time to take our foot off the accelerator’. When people are prepared to introduce stress into their lives needlessly to meet a commitment or push themselves beyond what is natural and true for the body, we can offer another way, by example or through our expression or simply by being honest rather than going along with it.

        2. Isn’t it interesting that the real truth is often the complete opposite to the ‘truth’ we have been fed in life – how we are meant to be, what’s important, why we should try to fit in …. all these beliefs we somehow end up with, where did they come from. Why isn’t the real truth more widely known.

        3. What you say is so true Rowena and it had me pondering that strangely enough when we “take our foot of the accelerator, stop living at breakneck speed and honour our rhythm and fragility” we actually in many ways go faster and get more done. Of course it not about “getting things done” – but “remaining connected to our love” is an incredibly practical, powerful and productive way of living and does not mean being slow or soft or anything like that!

        4. Great message Rowena “take our foot off the accelerator”. Before coming to Universal Medicine I only had one speed and that was – flat out trying to get as much done in as little time possible. I hadn’t realised that I was missing the joy of just being with myself in each moment.

     3. This is a great paragraph you have captured here Greg. For me I notice I push myself in the thought that I am actually pleasing others – How can placing pressure on yourself bring any true good to the world?

        1. Yes Abby, and I have found that doing something to please another serves no-one as it comes from a place of lacking connection to and love for yourself, so whatever it is you do, comes with that need for approval and a quality that is not really you.

        2. Putting pressure on ourselves feels like a way to fit in and be part of the general madness we have all subscribed to, in one way or another – I sometimes feel as though we are behaving like rats in a huge science experiment; while we think our scientists are peering down at lab rats, we are actually the ones being toyed and played with, poked and stimulated to behave in certain ways and not rock the boat of an unspoken code of complicity and acquiescence.

        3. It is as if placing pressure on yourself somehow makes you worthy, when in truth it is the opposite. Caring for yourself enough not to put yourself under pressure is a confirmation of our innate worth.

        4. Yes, I agree doing things with the idea of pleasing others is very unpleasing and very, very different to expressing from love or truth. I often get an instant hit of karma these days when I do something to please another because invariably they react or some unpleasant misunderstanding eventuates. Then I might have a thought such as how could you be so horrible when I was only trying to help. Such a thought immediately gives me the clue that I am off (disconnected from my true love) as I don’t have thoughts like that when connected. So I can stop look at the situation and observe that I did not act from true love but from a pleasing energy and learn from that!

        5. I know there have been times when people around me have been almost frenetic with activity, in a very chaotic manner, like a fly on it’s back, furiously buzzing around, trying to get up, but not actually achieving that, rather, just spinning around and around. I’ve felt almost guilty that I wasn’t feeling the same tension, that I must be missing something. What was missing was for me to have spoken my truth and to have created a stop moment for everyone to pause and continue in a more harmonious flow.

     4. Thank you for sharing Greg. It is amazing how deeply tender loving boys can grow into toughened macho men almost void of any feeling. Often some of the so called ‘hardest’ guys are actually the softest, sweetest guys when they drop their guard. What we put on as a front to the world not only gives and entirely false picture of the loveliness that we are it is also equally, frustrating and a very depressing way to live, so no wonder men and women’s suicide rates are through the roof.

        1. It’s true James so much is a front we present to the world. There was a guy that came into the supermarket yesterday that was built like macho man and was covered in tattoos and his movement were to show he was strong and tough, but all I could see was this gentle loving guy that was so tender and gorgeous, it was beautiful to see past the front he was offering to the world, in truth he could not really hide his gentleness and tenderness once I connected to and saw the man he really is.

        2. That is great Alison, it is amazing how often people do there best to hide how deeply sensitive and tender they are but things like their eyes or the way they move give them away. The more we honour each other in their natural tenderness the more we will freely express this way and the less of the false mask we will put on.

     5. I appreciate and celebrate your tender way of being Greg. You claimed back what you gave up so long ago and now reflecting for all to see the sweet love a man is and can express. A blessing for the world.

     6. Agreed Ariana.

     7. Sadly, this is the way for so many tender little boys, that they get lost “in all the wanting “to be that little step ahead,” instead of allowing love.” There are so many conditions put onto our young children in today’s society, and they get so quickly and easily caught up in the illusion that you talk about here Greg. It begs the question, what and where are we as adults, to allow this to continue? Generally, society is also still so caught up in this illusion that they do not notice that this does not have to be the way. Enter Serge Benhayon who for many of us, we will be eternally thankful, as he has shown us that we do have a choice when it comes to loving and caring for ourselves, and that we do not have “to be that little step ahead,” but can just be who we are.

     8. Thank you Mary, I agree, the Way of The Livingness as presented by Serge Benhayon has turned me 180 degrees to go back and reclaim the truth of who I am and undo all the lies I have lived. This simple process is me reflecting on all my past choices and understanding that I can now choose the energy from the divine essence so my “highly tuned radar constantly turning in a 360 circle is ready to pick up the slightest hint of danger.” In essence that little boy or girl had the radar fully operational and tuned in to clock the emanating love from others, what a relief to have it fully operational again! Love is a constant choice for ourselves first then and only then from that natural love that lives within the inner-heart, and when reconnect to our radar can then become fully operational again.

     9. Absolutely Ariana, I agree, Serge Benhayon is a game changer if we make the choice to reconnect and feel from our body the way to express the truth in every movement!

377. I love this line Mary –”asking for help is not a failure.” I work with students and I see how much this is part of how a lot of people operate. Asking for help is seen as a sign of weakness when in fact it is a strength.

378. Underneath all the abusive behaviours lays something we need to pull into the light before we can assure to leaving behind the root cause for all disregard and abuse. There is a deliberateness to abuse that is not sufficiently recognised by common psychology; only when we consider human beings to be more than the physical body and understand the spirit that is active behind the scenes will we see through the seeming discrepancy in the human nature.

379. Only by questioning the so-called normal we realize the real extent of abuse in our lives.

     1. Exactly Alex, it is pretty confronting when we first begin to clock just how much abuse is part of our “normal” every-day.

        1. I agree, Alex abuse is happening in so many layers and it can be very subtle, hidden and almost invisible. Like you say Hannah, it is so confronting to see that we act abusive in our daily lives because it is the norm and we are used to it and sometimes we call this kind of abuse – love.

        2. True Kerstin, we can normalise abuse and hide it under many guises; love, being a “good” parent / sister / brother / friend…

        3. in our society we will look at abuse of others but it’s mostly only in extremes, but we need to see it in all its forms and subtleties, otherwise we will always have a breeding ground for more severe forms of abuse.

        4. I agree Hannah – it’s sad to see how much abuse we accept on a daily basis under the guise of it being a normal way of relating.

     2. I agree Alex, as we can so easily ignore the elephant in the room and not deal with the layers of self-abuse clearly underway. So much of what we experience in life does not allow us to feel our enormity of our choices and so we do need to make a stop and really deeply feel what we are choosing and how we are living.

        1. I just have experienced a situation that exposes how blind I was to the abuse I allowed and contributed to because everything just looked fine, normal and worked well, so no complaint on any level – but complete ignorance of me not being all I am, instead adapting to what I considered as necessary and thereby also not supporting others involved to take responsibility. On balance a lose-lose situation while everyone thought it to be a win-win situation. The consciousness playing out here simply didn´t allow to see beyond its defined limitations; it was necessary to step outside the cheese dome to recognize it for what it is and then the abuse became obvious.

        2. Love what you’re sharing here, Alex, ‘everything just looked fine, normal and worked well, so no complaint on any level – but complete ignorance of me not being all I am, instead adapting to what I considered as necessary and thereby also not supporting others involved to take responsibility.’ ….. you’re exposing the way we can calibrate, to just bring ‘enough’, what we feel is needed and in so doing, we’re holding back so much divinity and, as you so beautifully point out, the support and inspiration we can offer to others to step up, take responsibility and to be so much more of themselves.

        3. I have found the same Alex, we have to step outside the dome, or even consider we are in a dome. Hence the perception that others need to change and not ourselves.

     3. Absolutely Alex, and this is why many do not want to question the ‘normal’ – because they don’t want to see the true levels of abuse that we have accepted in our society and that pollute everyday life.

        1. Questioning the normal is exposing the deal we have made to stay unaware and avoid the power and responsibility we have to change it. As long as we don´t ‘know’, we ‘cannot’ do anything about it.

        2. And whilst abuse is ‘normal’ there is forever an excuse for our irresponsibility.

        3. Yes Susie, and in addition to not wanting to see and feel the impact of the abuse we have allowed, people don’t want the responsibility that then follows this insight. The responsibility to speak up against abuse and not accept it in any form – a commitment that will lead to reactions from other people.

     4. Absolutely Alex such as the questions Christina has raised above.

        1. This game we play, twisting our perception of how we have handled a situation, so we ‘save’ ourselves from feeling the abuse that we chose, isn’t fooling anyone – especially ourselves. If we are honest, we know what we are doing, we’re opting to step away from ourselves to fit in, be accepted, prove something, rather than honouring our bodies and embracing our divinity.

     5. Yes Alex it is very revealing how much abuse we allow in our lives, and how that can quite easily become our new normal and accepted way of life.

        1. The amount of self-abuse I have had from tiny things to big things is incredible, but more incredible is how easy it is to continue in even tiny ways.

        2. I agree, and it is not until others start to question and or raise the flag to say something is not right about the way we are living that then allows us to create the necessary stop needed to truly feel the true rot we are entrenched in. What is also fascinating is how we can then see the rot but still struggle to step out of it, comfort being the ultimate holder.

     6. Yes, Alex, if we accept that everything that ‘happens anytime we are not living the true love we are’, then there is an enormous amount of abuse going on in our world today, in varying degrees. The scary part is that it’s become so normal, we don’t see it as abuse at all.

     7. Absolutley Alex. I have done exactly that recently, and allowed myself to feel how much abuse I have allowed in my life. But by giving myself permission to feel it, has allowed me to accept that I no longer need to make that choice and that it is ok to feel vulnerable, and by doing so I can feel the true beauty of who I am. It has been a revelation and deeply joyful, to feel what I have been avoiding for such a long time.

        1. Very revealing to realize that our patterns of protection actually contribute to the abuse we want to protect ourselves from. Accepting our vulnerability is really liberating us from abuse and the false mechanisms of protection and denial.

        2. It’s interesting that we avoid the things that in fact we deeply crave; and in avoiding, we are abusing, to not feel what we miss the most – our true selves.

        3. Beautifully said Sandra, and it is amazing to read of your changes and unfolding in this way and the differences you have made in just a short amount of time.

     8. so true Alex, when we don’t question what we deem normal we will always be in this continuous, probably vicious cycle, that is only cementing the self abuse deeper into the body.

     9. It’s great to poke a hole on what we think abuse is and show that abuse is so much more. For example not sharing with a colleague that a situation is not being handled in true care for another is very much abuse, but we don’t treat these situations as such. These are part of our ‘normal’ everyday lives, and we often accept it as normal when it’s not. So hats off for being honest enough to start this conversation. There is so much more to be talked about regarding this topic.

        1. I agree Matts, this is really just the beginning as abuse has so many layers. Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine have really brought this to the table and allowed for such a deep questioning of how we are choosing to live and how we are naturally supposed to be living without abuse whatsoever towards ourselves or others.

     10. We accept people’s behaviour as ‘normal’ because ‘that is how they are’. So sub-standard behaviour becomes accepted and is even protected, crazy.

         1. We seek ways to deal with how the world, people are, ourselves included and that involves managing the pain of knowing that this is not it, that we are so much more but don´t see it lived anywhere or believing that it is hard to do so etc. Basically we give up on people and ourselves when we accept or actually tolerate behaviours that are less than love, it is giving up and it is comfort as in not being the one who shows the world differently.

     11. Yes and I feel the “normal” we least want to look at is self abuse.

     12. Where I work the security staff work days for four days, have two days off and then do four nights, these are all 12-hour shifts. I asked why this strange schedule and the reply was it is normal and the only way to get people to work the night shift. I just feel it is a way to abuse everyone equally.

     13. Absolutely Alex, its only as we choose to be more aware and say no to abuse in any form that these areas start to stand out.

380. Universal Medicine and the Way of the Livingness they present is absolutely the greatest blessing to the world as studying and living them offer true awareness about what you have written here in you blog Christina. To let people know that it is not about what they do but about who they are is the most beautiful thing and very needed in the world.

381. “As I know today, this is a condition many women have been trapped in for their whole lives.” Absolutely, I think the ‘we can do it all’ is one of the most unseen epidemics amongst women. We all want to invidualise by being the one who can do it all, yet we are all trying to do this, isn’t that silly? That aside it is also showing the immense lack of self-worth many women are living with. I know myself that ‘I can do it all’ mentality as well and have lived with it as my badge of honour for a long time. The only way to realise that it does not work is to go back to our bodies and feel what an effect our choices have on our body. From there I found making a loving choice is far more easy and it brings that best feeling I know. The best feeling to have is to feel that it is not about what we do as women, but who we are and that we do not have to abuse our bodies to be liked as inside of us is the most beautiful person what ever is going on.

     1. What a world it will be where we not longer confirming each other what we all ‘can do’ – but hold each other in love and the knowing of who we are already: everything.

382. Amazing clarity and truth Christina – ‘Every need it has, and all the love I have in me, my body expresses with beauty and grace – far beyond any demands or expectations. In short, it is my pure and solid partner’ – I can feel the depth and truth of your words here as I begin to see that my body is a ‘pure and solid partner’. It speaks to us with such clarity and constancy and is forever supporting us throughout our day and night to come back to the truth of who we innately are.

383. When I got to see and experience how much healing can come from someone speaking the truth no matter what, it made me begin to question choices I had made and what I was holding onto.

     1. It was the same for me too Nicole, seeing someone walk their talk, and that talk be the truth, has been a complete eye opener to see what effects we have on others when we too walk the truth.

384. Interesting that it took you a week to recover – all our actions can affect us for several days, months, and even years, but we don’t always make the connection.

     1. So true Camel, it take honesty to see the effects of our actions.

385. The title of this blog is a great expose ‘Self-abuse Under the Umbrella of Making it Right’. In how the trying or making things ‘right’ can actually be abusive to ourselves. This is huge and something I feel we are not fully aware of but if we truly were, combined with self-love, it could change everything

386. Thanks Christina, a unique example you have used and the simple message is act on what feels right for the body

387. ‘Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal.’ Great point Christina. We also don’t like to hear truth and love expressed at times because it exposes the fact that we are starved of it in everyday life and that most of what is expressed or seen as love is actually just emotional need.

388. Just because we can do something, there is an expectation that we must do something. And always there is this expectation that we must outdo what has been done before us. Joe jumped off the bridge, as so it is expected we should do the same if we want our job, and before you know it, it becomes part of the culture.

389. If we use ‘making it right’ and many other ‘Umbrellas’ to justify our self-abuse, I am asking myself why we are so obsessed to abuse ourselves? So I asked myself how would life be if I would appreciate myself in every moment and live by it? And I found: I would be very confident, joyful and I would develop. Because appreciation is like laying a foundation on which I can build and grow… Interesting hey? So maybe I hold back my development with all this self-abuse and this is the real purpose of it. Next question must be: why do I not like to develop? Is it the responsibility I am shying away from? However …next time I found myself in self-abuse I will ask me, “what offer of developing do I kick out here?”

390. In short, it is my pure and solid partner – I love the absoluteness of this claim; the trust in the body and the inner knowing confirmed that the body is “the marker of all truth” – the foundation upon which the love and care of it is honoured.

391. Until we have a marker for what true love feels like in the body it is hard to understand the subtler levels of self abuse as you share Christine. I really appreciate when you say “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking”. When we understand and connect to the love we know, it is quite shocking how insidious the self abuse is and the level to which we allow it.

392. Reading this blog I can appreciate how quick we can be to make an ill choice, we can chose to jump in a moment, eat that piece of cake or say yes to something that does not feel right if we are not connected to what our bodies are communicating.

     1. Absolutely, its when we do not care about the body we can make choices that hurt the body and then hurt us…But when we choose to care and connect to the lovingness quality we have inside our body supports us.

     2. I felt that also fiona, it only takes one movement out to allow another movement out to follow. It takes great commitment to love to become aware of our every move.

393. This line says it all, Christina – “whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.” How different would the world be if each of us lived in accordance with the truth in our bodies? We would no longer abuse ourselves or each other.

     1. Yes Janet, it could be this SIMPLE!

394. Christina, thank you for such an honest sharing. Very deeply revealing to read whenever we go against what our body feels we are not only abusing ourselves but everyone else. I love the level of responsibility Universal Medicine asks us to live, knowing that all we do either harms or heals. What an amazing way to live, knowing you are making choices that supports the all.

395. So very true Chistina, ‘The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.’ Whilst this may seem strict or rigid, it is the way it is. I used to love being a fence sitter but the fence is an illusion – I am either being loving or not in each and every moment and the ‘fence’ is definitely not love, even though deceivingly so it looks at times very close to it.

     1. We might break it down to “If it is not love, it is abuse”.

        1. Simple and very true, it really is this black and white.

396. We tend to think of extreme events and actions when we think of the word abuse but as you have said in your blog here Christina, really anytime we over-ride what we are feeling and choose to act against our feelings we are abusing ourselves because in effect we are saying that we do not accept who we are and the knowing that we naturally have. We are rejecting our very essence.

397. It is has also taken me a while to trust and understand that my body does indeed know everything and has an intelligence that is far greater and broader and deeper than the intelligence from my mind. But once I gave this a go, it has truly been a revelation on how to live a much more full and enjoyable life.

398. Great blog Christina about a very important subject that I can totally relate to. I am still uncovering how much I can drive myself to do something for recognition or acceptance or fitting in at the expense of myself and my body.

399. The umbrella is really what we have said yes to in terms of abuse. The umbrella limits our visual field to what surrounds us. Thanks to it, we lose the big picture. Our ‘world’ becomes a very reduced one. The world of abuse is a pretty small one indeed. We make ourselves ‘ smaller ‘ to fit in too.

400. Many years ago, I went rafting for the first time in my life. It was part of a collective gift to a friend getting married. I did not know what rafting was. The whole thing was pretty intense to me. We arrived into one point that was the most difficult one. The raft could bottom out and the people inside it could hit the riverbed – plenty of rocks there, in a river that was suffering from lack of rain. For many in the raft this was the climax; the absolute challenge. They just loved it. The instructor asked whether we wanted out or to stay onboard. With no hesitation or shame, I opted out. I was about to marry and I said to myself, this is not worth it. I observed and the whole thing was pretty intense; they were almost about to overturn. Luckily it did not happen.Once we finished, we were told that in that particular spot someone died the day before.

401. There are many things we can do. This is a fact. Yet, the list gets dramatically reduced if we honour the body and ourselves first. When we do that, our body has no inclination whatsoever to go into abusive situations.

     1. I would say Eduardo ‘the list will change’ – because I can do so much more when I honor my body – just not the things I thought I have to do…. 😉

     2. One may wonder what relationship we have with our body, what image we hold about our body that we can treat it with disregard, expect it to simply function and consider this behaviour as normal. How do we expect to change unloving behaviours when we don´t love or even respect our body?

402. I love the point you raise about there being no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: as when you get to that level of truth anything except truth is harming.

     1. Yes Kevin, this struck a chord with me too in that there is no distinction of abuse – sure there are severities of it but abuse is abuse and always has an effect on the body.

403. When we become more caring and loving towards ourselves the abusive behaviours naturally fade away. I can’t believe some of the things I used to do, like playing rugby, something I would never do if I had my time over again as it is so abusive on the body.

     1. Yeah, I relate to this Kev, I look back on the sports I played and how hard and tense I hard to make my body to get through, there is no way I would do this now, it was all just a push for recognition, but I know now that this type of recognition just feeds a need for more and more of the same. A never ending desire to be accepted which is why you see so many sportspeople and celebrities taking on self abusive challenges, becasue they know society will give them a big pat on the back, all in the name of charity. The problem is that this is abuse and it is abuse that requires more of the same, a neve ending cycle.

404. What I found so lovely about this blog is that now you know, and you are living more and more to what feels true for you. A great example.

405. Niceness is such a common thing and if not niceness then rebellion. No one of this is harmonious, still the niceness is so ingrained that it sneaks in and hides itself behind the doing it right. Very true Christina, and it is a learning in progress for me to let this go.

406. Christina I was also guilty for overriding my body without even noticing how my body was suffering all because I want to be tough and to get this recognition too. Therefore I love it what you have shared in your powerful and honest blog as your lived experience can offer a deeper understanding of what was really going on.

     1. Striving for a ‘moment of glory’ requires us to override the body. This reflects our lack of relationship with the word ‘glory’ and the feeling of it in the body as something more permanent.

        1. Eduardo that is so true – “This reflects our lack of relationship with the word ‘glory’ and the feeling of it in the body as something more permanent.” It is really time to explore the relationship with “glory” more deeply . . .

407. The more tenderness and love that we live, the more we are aware of what is actually abuse.

     1. So true Kate, recently I have had a virus with a high fever and the tenderness I have felt in my body from the illness has been profound. The moment I go into any sort of hardness my body screams for me to stop and surrender back to the tenderness. It has been such a delicate message in showing me that way I was living before the illness did not work and was in truth abusive.

     2. What a great point to illuminate here katechorley – To appreciate the awareness of Christina. Beautiful!

408. These ideals that we have grown up with and live by really show how sold out we have become rather than live what we know is true and reclaim our power in any given situation.

     1. True Kate the ideals that we have chosen to run with, that encourage us to abandon what we feel in favour of what we think is expected of us (by ourself as well as others) show how much we have given up on the power of our presence and sold out to having to perform. I find there is huge pressure from society to carry on with these ideals which shows that when we remain true, not only is it beneficial for ourself, but also supports others in seeing that it IS possible to live a different way.

409. Hi Christina, thank you for your honest sharing here. It is amazing how our old patterns return so quickly but as you say, it is at those times when we are not truly with ourselves that we say yes to what is not true – easily. A great learning for us all.

410. It was great to read your blog Christina, as I can relate to the saying yes to things that my body would rather I didn’t do. I also did them for recognition and because I didn’t want to be seen as a woman who couldn’t do it or who was not strong enough but can now appreciate that I am way more than anything that I actually do. So crazy that we sell ourselves short in the doing and don’t appreciate the being that we are.

411. Christina thank you for such an awesome blog. I can relate to having pushed my body to gain acceptance and recognition to be seen as a superwoman or supermum, and then suffer chronic exhaustion and mild depression. Also pushing myself with studies- placing so much importance on making the A grade; again at the expense of my body- suffering from mental burnout, insomnia, and anxiousness.
     It was not until I was introduced to Serge Benhayon and attended his workshops that my life turned around, with more selfawareness, self care, selflove and self appreciation.

412. Thank you for sharing all this Christina, I think your point about feeling what is ‘right’ from the Body is a really important one. Thinking what is the right thing to do can be so subjective to any ideals or beliefs that we may hold which may not actually be true, whereas our body is an amazing marker of the reality of our choices.

     1. Well said Fiona, clearly ‘right’ & ‘true’ are 2 very different meanings. Right is coming from our beliefs with an agenda and truth is simply known by the body, it hurts or it supports which is revealed in the body by its gentle qualities or pains/injuries/hardness etc.

413. I love what you’ve shared here Christina and how you’ve brought it back to ANYTHING that doesn’t feel right in our bodies, regardless of magnitude or scale is disharmonious and a push that runs against the tenderness that are bodies are divinely designed to be in. The being ‘nice’ is one I’d even go as far to say is much more insidious than jumping off a roof — the latter is an obvious assault on the body that will go into survival mode in that moment. But being ‘nice’ is something that’s so prevalent and so accepted and we’ve made it normal, and hence normal for our bodies to recoil into a configuration that takes us away from the expansiveness our bodies are designed to be in. It’s something I’ve been clocking for some time now, and it’s still a work in progress, but the more I claim the true movements my body naturally calls me to choose, the less I can literally handle the recoiling that takes place in my own body when I go into niceness.

414. Hi Christina, thank you for your sharing . I have often over ridden my body and done things that have been detrimental and not loving to it. How can we do this to our bodies when without them we would not be able to evolve back to our true selves! You have answered the question “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others . It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are”

415. This article is amazingly timely. Only yesterday I was asked to help a friend who was completely panicked, out of a very sticky self inflicted situation. It was an extremely awkward conversation as my whole body was telling me not to have any part in contributing to the deceit that was being asked of me. I had a tug-of-war going on inside of me being pulled one way by my friend who was effectively emotionally blackmailing me and my inner knowing reminding me not to take part in anything that is not about truth.
     This article is a good supportive reminder to just stay open to what my body is telling me.

416. It’s interesting what unfolds when you start to take responsibility for your health. It can be confusing for those around you because on one hand you begin to take greater care of yourself than you did before, and at the same time …’more hidden choices of self-abuse showed up…’, It is only when we stop and accept the reality of our choices that we then have an opportunity to heal whatever is being presented that before we didn’t want to feel, but was already always there.

417. Christina thank you for a great sharing. It reminds me of the saying ‘when they say jump, the response is ‘how high’? We have choice for all the wonderful self-loving and true reasons you share.

418. Usually we associate ‘abuse’ with some extreme kind of behaviour, but to consider that we abuse ourselves or another already when we don’t fully honour one´s true nature. Then we can not hide and justify anymore the lack of love and care just by comparing a seeming less extreme disregard with a gross one.

     1. This is a great point, Alex. The fact is that anything that is not love is abuse and this really does call us to account and requires us to go to a new level of responsibility.

        1. The moment we use a marker of absoluteness like love or truth or harmony abuse is exposed in full and the all-encompassing meaning of responsibility is revealed.

419. This is a game changing statement when I stop and feel what this means on a day to day basis – “I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.” and it exposes that doing anything out of obligation for another when it is not truly felt, is self abuse.

     1. well said Sandra! Any pleasing or extenuating ourselves when it’s not a genuine feeling from our body is abusive, not just to ourselves but to the other as well, who then get the message back that it’s ok to disregard what we truly feel.

420. Thank you Chrisitina, I can relate to the ’I can do it’ which is very much linked to ‘this is my job I have to do it’. It is like I am programmed to do it by a contract I have signed. So it seems like there is a step before this automatic switch that makes us do something that we naturally would not feel to do. We somehow hold a card in the whole game, where we have said yes to the system. So it is this card, this straw, this investment that we still hold that needs to be rendered naught.

421. ‘I learned to shift my behaviors from choosing what was cool to have, fancy to be, or yummy to eat, into: feel first what to eat, which words are truly needed to say, and what I am really to do, and that being connected with my body is the real deal!’ This is enormous. If we all did that, turned the coin around by allowing us to feel more than to think what is next the world and how we are with each other would change dramatically to a more harmonious state.

422. “Nowhere else outside of Universal Medicine was I ever reflected this truth before, to which my inner heart responds without doubt.” This last sentence says it all for me. I too was never shown this whole and deeply honest truth before coming across Universal Medicine. My eyes have been opened as too has my heart.

     1. As with so many other areas of life, Universal Medicine calls out, exposes and explains what is really going on, challenging every aspect of our lives that is void of love. And further it offers true answers for real change instead of just temporary solutions that in the end prolong the same misery.

     2. I love this “My eyes have been opened as too has my heart”, it is the same for me. Prior to Universal Medicine i abused my body by being completely disconnected and irresponsible to caring for my body. For example at one stage i was smoking cigarettes in one hand with a ventolin puffer in the other for asthma – that is abuse.

423. Great blog Christina, I could relate to how easy it is to revert back to our old ways, not feeling the harm that it will do and that our body will suffer for a few minutes reward and recognition for doing something ‘right’. It is never worth it, when we stop listening to our body this is when the most harm is done.

424. It occurs to me that we all walk around “battle-scarred”, like a warrior in life if we are not aware of the abuse that comes our way, – abuse that is accepted by us without even a conscious second thought. I agree Christina, “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.”

425. Christina, I have never been an actress, required to do stunts, but I have placed my body in some very harsh challenging situations whilst riding horses and mustering cattle, fencing and yard building. At the time I was doing this work, I never allowed myself to feel just how physically demanding and abusive it was on my body as you have shared. I thank you dearly for being so honest here, as whilst I no longer participate in these activities, I, at times find myself holding my body with the resolve I remember from these times to stay stoic to get the job done. This needs a little more unraveling for me and your writing is great support, as I am sure it is for many others.

426. This takes abuse to its core – “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.”.

     1. Thanks for highlighting this point Sandra, it makes living pretty simple, black and white in fact! We are either living who we are or not, and the ‘or not’ bit is abuse to everything we are. Yet, we always have a choice and at our core, we are love no matter what we choose.

        1. It is simple Rachael, and yet we have a tendency to complicate it by denying the truth of who we are and living away from the love that we naturally are.

427. Christina this paragraph that really stood out to me ‘I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself. There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there’, truth beautifully expressed.

     1. It stood out for me too Alexis, we see the more extreme things but often ignore the more subtle day to day things. But the day to day things add up and because they are more subtle go unnoticed and so are more deadly.

428. There is a lot of glamour in pushing ourselves hard, I know that well from my sporting days, it is seen as cool to tough it out, to battle through or to “take one for the team”. It is also seen in many movies where action heros are seen as being aspirational, that we should strive to be indestructible types who can withstand the extraordinary. But perhaps what is really extraordinary is when we recognise our own fragility and that in fact this is what we should cherish and aspire to, a deep strength in embracing tendeness rather than chasing an image that disregards our bodies.

     1. If we need to push ourselves hard to feel extraordinary it is because we feel pretty empty and meaningless to start with. For this reason, we go there once and again and again.

429. Eradicating abuse from our lives requires to be very vigilant regarding what is usually considered to be normal and acceptable. Accepting abuse from another one, is playing ball with a false sense of expansion (of the other) that has an imposing quality to it. Only when we are in a true (not imposing) expansive energy (the contrary of holding back), the ‘familiar’ relationship we have with abuse loosens its grip on us and we can see it clearly for what it is.

430. As a society we need to break down the concept that ‘abuse’ is only that which happens physically and obviously. Being honest with ourselves and how we are feeling in our bodies and in the lives we are living will reveal the many subtle ways that we allow abuse into our lives and accept as a normality. In truth abuse is simply any activity that is not of Love. That would mean that we mostly all experience a degree of self-abuse on a daily basis through the loveless ways we at times move through our day. How are we with ourselves when we look in the mirror for example? Are we loving, understanding, encouraging or are we judging, self-loathing, condemning? Self-abusive thoughts often happen so fast we don’t notice it. So in developing our connection to our bodies we are able to feel the tender quality of Love that we are, our marker of who we naturally and choose to honor this quality in all that we do as best we can. With this we then will lead the way and say NO to a culture that is driven by self-abuse.

431. Marika what a great build on what Christina has shared, we often look at the entertainment industry with googly eyes and adoration. Putting actors, dancers and acrobats on the stage above us. Yet to gain an insight into the self abuse that is needed to complete many of these tasks is quite astonishing, furthermore for us to idolise that abuse is something that is starting to ring my alarm bells.

     1. Yes, the reality or abuse is veiled by illusion and does not fit the image or picture we want see, or the industry wants us to see. It is great to expose this.

432. How often do we put ourselves in situations where we feel we need to do what is right or expected, but to do so will compromise ourselves and be abusive?

     1. Many, many times over it seems Rebecca, the search for recognition from the outside world drives one to do some crazy things to their body.

        1. It would seem to be that way, and perhaps so much of the unexplainable behaviour people have would be far easier to understand with recognition and attention as the basis

        2. Absolutely Rebecca, throw in a little confirmation and we are happy to keep going. With many allowing this to be the normal it’s no wonder many are happy to never stop such behaviour.

433. Putting on the ‘override’ button is something I used to do my whole life, instead of honouring me and feeling what was right for me and my body I would do the complete opposite … the consequences being my life and body where a mess. With the support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I have been able to change this and now Iove and look after my body far more, honouring myself more and what feels true for me and my life is pretty awesome. Although this is still work in progress and there is learning to do, I am now loving myself and others far more than I have done before.

434. Yes, we CAN do so much – but is that the way? To question that is very interesting and life changing.

435. “I used to push myself and my body really hard all my life, living in the belief that “I am strong, I can do that, and I’ll make it without any help.” Trying to show how independent I was as a woman, somehow trying to prove that “I can do it!”” So many women, including myself, believed this- needing to prove I was as good as the next person – being independent was viewed as a good thing. Learning about the innate fragility and delicacy of women was an eye opener for me – and now I value this in myself and can ask for help when required. Doing it the hard way was a form of abuse, but I never saw it at the time.

     1. Wow Sue, I love your honesty here. This is not only for Women, but for Men as well – at least just as much (if not more). The proving and competitive energy that I’ve chosen all my life tells it all. Not wanting to be fragile and / or vulnerable and the only way to maintain that was by constantly choosing to deny my own fragility, sensitivity and loving connection with myself. I am learning that it’s either one of the two – choosing proving, competitive energy or loving energy. The choice is mine and boy oh boy is the outcome different. Deeply admitting that I’ve hurt myself deeply is something I’m slowly admitting.

436. ‘I am abusing myself. There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ ….. they both need a push to go there’ There is a deep truth, and not a little humour in this comment. When we compromise what we are feeling, we open ourselves up to that abuse… and will inevitably experience the hang over from what happens.

     1. I love the way you have used the phrase ‘inevitably experience the hang over’ to explain what happens after we neglect our body and push for a result Simon, because I have found that any unloving choice does indeed have an impact on the body that needs to be taken care of and resolved just like a hang over.

        1. And literally a hangover as well – it leaves me feeling gritty, bleary eyed and wrecked the next morning!

437. Wow Christina, this is a powerful bog. It really reveals that abuse does not just come in major horrific forms but also in very subtle forms that can appear to be doing good. This form of abuse is more common and happens in our everyday life if we do not pay attention and choose a more loving way.

     1. Put like this chanly88, it puts just about everyone on the planet into some level of self abuse – that’s a big consideration that most people would not have stopped to consider. But when put into context of anything we do that doesn’t feel true or is not loving, then that brings it down to the smallest of actions we do daily.

        1. That’s right Sandra. I have now realised that the smallest subtle forms of abuse are easily missed and therefore continue to play out and contribute to the energy of abuse in the world without us being aware on a daily basis. This is one of the greatest harms we are causing to ourselves, others and our world, when we are choosing anything less than love it means it is simply abuse. Awareness is a key starting point to arrest the abusive energy that surrounds us and it is then entirely up to us to take responsibility for it and to correct abuse. I am learning to take responsibility without perfection, but to the best of my ability, as I know if I accept anything that is not love, it is then simply abuse. So, from awareness followed by taking responsibility, followed by standing up to abuse or nominating it by speaking up or calling it out. These are the steps I am learning to take to make life about love and not abuse.

        2. Absolutely Sandra, it does expose and question how many of us are or have been living with abuse.

438. ‘To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act.’ This is huge and something that ruled my life until recently so like you I am shocked at how quickly and insidiously it can reappear and I make the choice that it’s abusive to my body. Thank you for the reminder ‘to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine.’

439. “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking” That’s an eye-opener. In both cases there is a decision to force ourselves to do something that our body is saying ‘no’ to. Yet, while I rarely (if ever) have to jump off of a building, I am nice on a regular basis, and have to override the clear signals my body is sending me.

     1. Being nice is so ingrained in us from a young age. We’re taught to be polite, don’t be rude, be nice, etc and it’s true Naren, our bodies do give us very clear signals that it isn’t feeling true. One example that jumps out is when children sit with a ‘Santa Claus’ for a photo. Many children cry or they look really miserable – why because they can feel the quality of the person wearing the suit! Simple. Parents will encourage and almost force children to sit for a photo with Santa, but they wouldn’t do the same thing with the exact same person – a stranger without the suit on.

        1. And the great irony is that so often those parents are forcing their children to be nice because they are being nice themselves and do not want to offend other people. Great point, Sandra.

440. Yes Marika, in an interview with a ballet dancer, he said if his daughter wanted to become a ballet dancer he would ‘tell her the truth about the bleeding toes and blistered toes, tendonitis and crumbling hips’ He admitted he took painkillers to distract him from the torture he put his body through and that ‘people dance injured all the time’ As you say ‘the show must go on’, but at what cost.

441. Why is our illusion of normal only present in the apparently highest evolved creature on this planet? In nature there are no illusions! As you have said Christina, when are living the true love we all are there can be no illusions.

     1. Interesting relationship you expose here – illusion and love. Somehow they seem to oppose each other and of course without illusion no abuse. The moment we recognize love as our true nature any abuse sticks out as the unnatural and deliberate choice it is.

442. Your blog resonates enormously Christina, whilst I may not have to do stunts for my job I can relate to everything you share about seeking recognition through what I do. This brings a push and a drive that hurts the body from the subtlest of ways, as you say even having a conversation with someone when I don’t want to talk. I too have found nowhere apart from Universal Medicine that shares what it means to live in a way that nurtures, supports and cares for the body and ourselves in such a way. It’s revelatory.

     1. I agree Rachel, I even found myself bumping into things and dropping things in the shower this morning, a clear sign that I was not with myself so therefore open to moving in a way that is not true for me and ultimately abusive.

443. I agree Marika. It also shows that by bringing more love in to the body, Christina’s body had become more sensitised and resists going back to the old ways and if she does her body shouts back. It’s a testimony of how far she’s come, as well as a reflecting that an attachment to recognition and ‘getting it right’ can lead you to push the body too far.

     1. Great point Kehinde. In the past Christina probably would not have felt the effect that jumping off the roof had on her body, but today, as she brings more awareness to how she cares for her body, she now has a greater opportunity to feel everything.

444. It’s amazing how we can build the gentleness and tenderness in our bodies and then one choice that is out of alignment with this can have so much of an effect. The devastation of this can be felt to a greater degree because of the huge contrast to how we usually live.

     1. Coming out of abuse means to re-sensitize hence disregarding behaviours that once seemed to be okay or normal are recognized for their unloving and harming nature. Looking back one may wonder how numb one was and looking forward how much more love there is to re-discover.

        1. Yes, by looking back we can see how much more sensitive we have become over time. From this we can know that there is still much more to discover and feel as we choose love over abuse.

        2. Wow. If it is so that what lies before me could be discovering love in the way I did discover love in the past few years…I can not imagine that. My life changed so much from a deeply disregarding and abusing way to where I am now, more honoring me and my body that I become curious and humble of the realizing that there is still more to discover.
           And it is a great point to see that it is not yet time to stop with the discovering just because my life did become so much better. ‘Better’ is not enough. And even my life becomes the best what I can live these days, it still has to grow in the way of inspiring others to honor themselves as well. Not until everyone does honor themselves and the other, not until everyone lives love in full we are done here. So, looks like there is very much in front of me…. and ‘living discovery’ is the next superhero-skill.

        3. There is no end to the depth of love that we can be, a constant evolution and expansion. The moment we settle for ‘better’ we retard this process and thereby diminish the quality we are already living.

        4. Exactly! That’s why APPRECIATION is so important. The moment I appreciate where I am, who I am and what I bring/live with this state, I make it solid, complete. And this solidness is not just good to build on – it asks me to build on it, the next step (the next level) is coming to me, knocking, present themselves. I just have to go on…

     2. This is a great point Rebecca, once that tenderness is lived and registered by the body, when we leave this it is clearly felt.

     3. This is very true Rebecca, I live in a way now that most of the time I take care of myself and do not push my body, so if ever I do push myself by rushing or lifting something too heavy for example then this feels awful in my body, in the past this would have been my normal way to live and I would not have noticed.

     4. So true Rebecca, the more we liveth love the easier it is to feel the abuse.

445. This blog reminds me of the times we choose to do something that pushes us in order to raise money for some charity or charitable cause. Often people do things that are dangerous and push themselves past any parameters of self care in order fulfill these self imposed challenges. These acts and the actors of them are championed and the pride of doing whatever it is sits with that person. All this fuels a false world that exists on looking the part. What if we were to look at what we are truly doing to ourselves in these situations and became more honest and began to respect our bodies? Then by looking after ourselves there would be no need for most of these charities in the first place. Great blog Christina.

446. how deeply conditioned I am to the “I can do it” attitude. It came in again in seconds! We are all deeply conditioned and for each of us it will be different, and the one that gets me in seconds is; ‘I am alone’, how many times have I fallen for this, too many to count. That said, I can feel, how untrue this is as the support in my life just keeps pouring in!

447. And it is not just this industry that has these expectation and demands in fact more and more are putting unrealistic pressure on staff member which in turn feeds these ideals and beliefs that work is more importance then ourselves.

     1. Yes great point aminatumi, I hear stories all the time of what is expected of employees that is nothing short of abuse… it is interesting to ponder though where responsibility for this lies. No question in part with the employer who is wielding the demands, but equally, if not greater with the employee who says yes. A bit of a hot potato that one that we as a society have yet to deal with at any level of truth.

     2. So true Jenny. When we say yes or allow it to go on, we are feeding the cycle of abuse. That old saying of putting a spanner in the works…someone has to do it in order to make a change…

     3. Yes, agree Jenny and Sara — we have to be careful not to lay the blame outside of us on those bad employers and this bad industry. Ultimately, we’ve said yes to the current status quo in the world because we first and foremost said yes to abandoning and hence abusing ourselves. The pillars and fabric of society around us are in response to how we are with ourselves. We need to take a deep look at our own choices, literally choose differently from here forward and then the world around us will change as well.

     4. I agree with you Amina and Jenny and I can also see how people are stuck in a tricky position a lot of the time because they fear to speak up against the abuse in case they lose their job so in fear of that scenario, they allow the abuse and nothing changes

     5. Yes aminatumi, and it also has become the norm where staff places this pressure on themselves because they like to be seen to be so busy all the time to prove their worth, and that is all about work first and nothing else.

448. And furthermore… Our minds cannot discern the subtleties of abuse, only the body can… and then only when it is finely tuned to register anything not in line with it’s true nature.

     1. Yes Jenny, we have been lead to believe that our mind is all intelligent but in truth the wisdom of the body registers our every move away from harmony. How truly loving this relationship is when we listen.

        1. Beautifully said Victoria, ‘how truly loving this relationship is when we listen’… and proves the body knows love as it’s foundation, as otherwise we would not register what is not loving so instantly and unreservedly.

        2. So true Jenny.

     2. Our body is our pathway back to God, our mind the detour we take along the way.

        1. So very true Liane, what a way to see every foray into fantasy, thinking ahead, planning, analysing and just our general mental cogitations.

449. Christina such a powerful blog thank you, and so important to raise the question of what we’ve come to understand abuse to be… we have become so de-sensitised to what it really is, as you’ve shared, and the need to re-establish a relationship with the depth of sensitivity and gentleness that is our very core is the only way.

     1. This is so true Jenny. We have become de-sensitised to abuse so much that we champion dis-regarding ways of living an achievement.

        1. Yes absolutely Carola, we have completely lost sight of what success actually means… from the body. I’ve heard it asked…’ if we interviewed the body and asked it, what would it say? ‘ Well… the only success would be to be loving, as this is the only activity the body registers as truly harmonious.

450. Beautiful Christina, you have exposed so much in this blog, so much for us to ponder and be truthful about.
     “The only truthful ‘making it right’ is to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine. No more, or less”.
     What you have expressed here is simple, powerful and wise; no more, no less.

451. Thank you Christina. I have noticed this also – how i go back into old ways of playing in the world. These begin to feel strange and out of place once we are aware of what’s going on. It’s awesome you noticed the effects that it had on your body afterwards and didn’t just carry on as usual.

     1. I agree, it is the first big step away from abuse when we realise what effect certain actions have on our body, and not to put it away and carry on and maybe be even proud of it, but to truly feel what has happened and let our body heal. That way we feel and nurture how our body naturally likes to move and be, thus we get to know our body better and build ourselves a foundation that allows less and less abuse in our life.

     2. It sticks out so much when we step back into old familiar abusive patterns after developing some tenderness and self-care, so much easier to clock it and bring ourselves back before it becomes that old habit we do not notice.

        1. True Jenny, then one begins to notice more and more also.

452. It is great to reflect on why we put outside demands in front of respecting and honouring ourselves and address the beliefs we have taken on that make us feel we are not enough being ourselves… for we absolutely are enough and we don’t need to prove this to anyone, especially at our own expense.

     1. ‘for we absolutely are enough and we don’t need to prove this to anyone, especially at our own expense’ Beautifully said Sam.

453. A real gem of a blog, Christina, with so many great one-liners that jump out from the page. Love the description of the body – ‘my pure and solid partner’ and the stark reminder that ‘whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself’. Ouch. So thanks for the advice – to ‘feel the body first – and listen to the answer on the inside.’. A perfectly timed read as I can now appreciate how and why my ‘normal’ in regards to my body needs reconfiguring, for sure.

454. Recognising how easily we abuse our body, brings awareness to how much our body puts up with before it gets dis-eased or ill. Herein lies a key to Preventative Medicine, a daily dose(s) of self love and care.

     1. Yes Johannebrown17, and the interesting thing about self-love and our bodies is that what constitutes ‘self-love’ varies for each of us, continuously. It is always changing, as we evolve. It is hard to fathom at the beginning that to be self-loving is not prescriptive, but rather a living, changing and evolving relationship with yourself.

        1. Yes it is not something that we can tick off the list as having done but a commitment to constantly feeling what is right for the body at that moment and acting from there.

        2. Yes exactly Helen, it is like us, constantly evolving and changing, and nothing can remain static or fixed as a result.

        3. Johannebrown17 and Jenny, Your comments here are so key to every single person, self love is a constantly deepening experience and asks us to continually refine how we are in and with our bodies, showing us that our tenderness is there to be lived with, not something to visit now and then. Accepting this as our true way, is what brings the constant evolving and deepening adjustments.

        4. Yes Leigh exactly, tenderness acknowledges that we are worth loving, and remind us that we come from and belong to the love that underpins it. We cannot be truly tender if we are not willing to be loving and so one begets the other.

     2. So true johannebrown17, with awareness of what is abuse and was is not this can assist us to arrest abuse we choose to live with on a daily basis. I love your form of medicine ‘self love and care.’ It is available immediately and what’s more, no prescriptions needed.

     3. A couple of great comments Jo and Jenny, just pointing out the subtle nuances of how abuse can be felt differently, and how our self care develops – it brings me back to the core concept of evolving… not having to be right, but day by day working on it all, growing in our awareness.

455. The “I can do” it attitude you describe Christina, can be at play with anything. The seemingly kindest gesture, the warmest smile, the nicest words that some might say, all of these can still come from a place of need and not our true light. The ironic thing is when we take these umbrellas away we get to see the world is raining LOVE down on you and me, supporting us constantly to be ourselves and no-one’s stunt double.

     1. Beautifully said Joseph… ‘the world is raining LOVE down on you and me, supporting us constantly to be ourselves..’ so true, and so easily forgotten.

        1. I love this too and it is very true. The support is always there we just need to learn to see/feel it.

        2. Yes… very easy to forget that we come from a love so grand it is impossible not to feel supported if we allow even the smallest connection to it. Letting love in however can be very challenging sometimes, and often when we most need to feel it.

456. This blog is awesome Christina thank you. It just goes to show that our number one ally in life is listening to our bodies talk to us. When we support our bodies with love and care the truth speaks volumes.

     1. I agree Kelly – we tend to our body and cherish our every particle and our bodies will speak absolute Love.

457. Christina, this is such an important blog and so many things jumped out at me, it will need more reads for sure. Biggest one today is when you noted that you wanted to be someone who can be relied on – that has been my game for years and within that I abuse myself, and I’m seeing that actually if I am operating from this sentiment I am not being true, no matter how supposedly reliable I am being.

     1. Oh yes, “wanted to be someone who can be relied on” with regard to the image that appears for the result and disregard that we could stay with the love so others could rely on that.

458. Thank you for this super honest account of what we actually do to ourselves when we go against our innate tenderness and delicate nature. A real eye opener if we allow ourselves to be courageous enough to feel it in full.

459. Yes, great blog post. “Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal.” Beautifully said.
     And as you say, it can be a big act that makes us disregard ourselves or something small that previously we would not have considered as abuse, but when we truly feel it within, it is there speaking loudly. And it is not for anyone else but ourself to feel that, so if we use our own feelings and not what others accept as normal, then the conversation with ourself becomes very caring and true.

     1. I can definitely relate to what you share here Janine, and it is amazing to feel how the body changes when we are communicating directly with it and allow it to have it say. Negative thoughts that enter the body are not from the body.

460. An amazing sharing I can so relate to that making it right thing. Truly honest and amazing sharing.

461. Christina thank you for such an awesome blog. I can count myself as one of those independent women who could handle anything. I am now learning as you to feel my body more and listen to that. I like how you expose the ‘nice’ energy too a pattern that I am working on.

462. “I got to the point that I recognised that whenever I do something that is not truly felt to be right from my body – I am abusing myself.” Yes so true Christina it may seem extreme but it is how it is. I have pushed and overridden my body too in the past and do so still at times but much less. I would often have that result of having done it all after pushing through but it left me feeling exhausted. When I honour my body now, how seemingly small it may be, life completely changes from full of struggle to space, harmony and joy.

     1. Thank you Lieke for your honest account of what is taking place for you, it is really fascinating to feel how abuse had become a normal way for us to live until Universal Medicine came and highlighted the error in this way of living.

     2. Lieke, this sentence stood our for me too. Sometimes small but constant acts of self abuse, particularly related to food, become part of our everyday, and without true love in our body can be difficult to release.

     3. I agree Lieke. Those small victories achieved, felt and celebrated when we push ourselves, overriding what our body needs are nothing in comparison with the joy felt when we live in connection with our bodies.

        1. Yes Jane and the small victories always are of short nature when living in connection with our bodies brings a constant joy every moment of the day.

        2. So true Lieke. The quality of both are poles apart. Whenever I have had moments of happiness when I have achieved something they have always come with a sense that they ride on borrowed time and sure enough a sense of loss would follow soon after. By contrast, there is so much joy in living in connection and a feeling of space and presence, that every moment feels full and complete in itself

463. Thank you for your honesty Christina.

464. Understanding and observing why we go into certain behaviours and habits is so empowering and for me it truly began by reconnecting with my body. “So I started working on this and deepening my awareness of what this sensitive vehicle really needs…” Our bodies are so sensitive and they offer us so much if we are willing to feel.

465. I also am a student of The Way of the Livingness, for me this means reawakening my connection with my body, my soul and God and Expressing it. And absolutely none of it can be directed by some one else, I do not learn verse, or go to a specific building to worship. The religion I live is that of the inner heart, reconnecting with my body has offered a deep awareness, love and truth to evolve and it has been inspired by Serge Benhayon and others and it is lived, practiced and embodied by my own commitment and expression.

466. Any time we don’t hold the responsibility of the effect our choices have on others can be considered abuse.

     1. Wow Annie, I like this. It takes it a step further for one to feel how much responsibility we hold in every action.

467. Your connection to your tenderness, the tenderness we all are is expressed so beautifully, deeply felt and highlights how any movement that is not of this tenderness, of the Love that we are is abuse.

     1. I agree Carola. I only came to realise this since attending Universal medicine courses, presentations and work shops. Now, I have a clear understanding of what abuse really is, anything that is not love.

     2. Beautifull said Carola, “any movement that is not of this tenderness, of the Love that we are is abuse”.

     3. It is interesting that we can justify some of our own self-abuse and lack of tenderness just because it is not in the gross forms considered as normal in society such as being violent or verbally abusive. Christina highlights a coming back to self and feeling what is not tender in our bodies is actually self-abusive.

        1. It is so true Jenny. It is through choosing to be aware of, being honest and calling out the subtle ways that we allow self-abuse to enter our lives that we are then able to build and confirm a greater body of Love that knows that tenderness is its natural way.

468. A powerful piece Christina that exposes the illusion of how being ‘good’ or being ‘right’ leads us to act in ways that are in fact abusive to ourselves and others. It is these subtle forms of abuse, of the way we disregard ourselves, our tenderness for an ideal or belief that we are not already enough, that are accepted as our normal way to be and so not even considered abuse at all. Yet the fact is when we are not being loving with ourselves we are being abusive. It is only when we discover how tender we truly are through developing a self-loving relationship with ourselves and our bodies that it become more and more obvious when we are not being loving and as such abusing ourselves.

469. We choose abuse or love in an instant, and as you say Christina it doesn’t matter the extremes of it. I’ve literally jumped as well, from planes and been crashed into in racing cars resulting in putting my back out and living with chronic headaches for months, all to be recognized and to impress others. Once we know how naturally gentle and tender we are the abuse we put our bodies through is exposed more and even the most subtle of abuse is clear, like over-eating or lack of sleep.

     1. I have found this too the more connected I am to my body the easier it is to detect anything that is not inline with its natural rhythms.

        1. So true Abby the more I listen for those messages the body is constantly communicating the more obvious it is when I move or act in a way that is against its natural movement and cycles.

        2. And this is certainly the point – we all know this…or why would we be going to such lengths to dull our knowing, shoosh our body or vacate it all together. The messages keep sending but are they falling upon closed ears, shut eyes and dulled senses?

     2. Absolutely Aimee, and through exposing these things we learn that ‘subtle’ forms of abuse such as overeating, lack of sleep and being aloof with our bodies, can add up and have the same contracting effect on our bodies as injuring ourselves does.

470. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” Anything we do for self, recognition, being accepted is self-abuse. Universal Medicine continue to redefine what abuse is. I am understanding, as Christina expresses too, if I am not fully aware of me and my body and surrendering, letting people in, being understanding to myself and others, appreciating myself as a way of life, and continuing to evolve, I am abusing the ‘right’ for others the opportunity to know what abuse is also. As I learnt recently it starts in your home and where you work. Where ever you are it is your choice to feel and know what is true from your body for not only the benefit of you but all who are around you.

     1. This is beautifully expressed Rik and I can say that as I have experienced abuse both in work and at home from others what I find also just as damaging is the abuse I allow from others along with how I have also abused myself and others. Even allowing negative thoughts is abusive for myself and everyone else, this really takes the level of responsibility to whole other level.

471. “The only truthful “making it right’ is to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine. No more no less.” This blog is perfect timing for me to read this morning Christina, thank-you for the reflection. In the past I have also disregarded what was truly caring and nurturing for my body for the sake of proving that although I was on my own on a property I could do it all. Though not so obvious and under the guise of even being ‘good’ for me, this morning I was thinking about doing something that even if far more subtle would have put me into that self-abuse mode once again. I can feel how important it is to check in with my body all the time to feel whether what I am about to do is right for me, because it is possible that although usually what I am doing maybe supportive to my health and well-being there are times when it may not.

472. You may have switched back to a self-disregarding pattern in ‘seconds’ Christina, but what stands out for me is the commitment to living a true life that I feel from all you have written. There is such respect and appreciation for your deepening relationship with your body.

     1. Great point Lucy and a beautifull appreciation of Christina.

     2. I agree – we switch to our old patterns in split seconds. That is unavoidable. But then we have a choice and that is what matters – our choice once we realise we have switched.

        1. Awesome Christoph – I catch myself so often, that I switch to old patterns and I like what you are saying – yes, maybe it is unavoidable, but we have a choice to change it again, and that is what matters – very empowering.

        2. Yes Christoph… and the name of that game is awareness, without it, we will think we have no choice but to act the way we have felt impulsed to. It also requires us to be very loving in that moment we recognise the choice has in fact been untrue, and hence unloving, otherwise our next choice will be equally so.

     3. I agree Lucy. The world today is a big set up for abusing ourselves. Really nearly everything is supporting us here. To live and show a difference way of living is a challenge and can not be honored enough.

473. The realisation that abuse is anytime we are not living the love that we are is huge. This abuse will look different for each of us but often it is all to familiar patterns that reappear and like you said Christina it always feels terrible when we fall for this again.

     1. When I realised what abuse really is, it was huge for me too to comprehend. It exposed that I was living with abuse almost everyday. I was not even aware of this but now eventhough I have more awareness I too find myself falling back into old habits and behaviours. As I connect to living lovingly more and more, abuse is less likely to creep back in. We either are loving or abusive, no in between – it is love or not.

        1. And the more we are willing to recognise in ourselves and see, the deeper we can go to uprooting the every aspect of abuse it its many forms. We too, have allowed our definitions of Abuse to be greatly skewed and we have standardised abuse as everyday human interaction.

        2. I was the same Chan, I couldn’t believe what abuse I was living in. I’ve just gone through another moment where I’ve seen abuse in my life that had been running without me wanting to be aware of it. It showed me that until I bring love into ALL aspects of my life I’m leaving room for abuse to dwell.

        3. Brilliantly said Deborah. I now see so clearly what I have allowed to cloud and skew my understanding of abuse in the past. This part hits the nail on the head ‘we have standardised abuse as everyday human interaction.’ Wow, a big ouch when we are willing to accept the truth of what we’ve allowed and accepted.

        4. Awesome Kim, I love your honesty and I totally agree. ‘It showed me that until I bring love into ALL aspects of my life I’m leaving room for abuse to dwell.’ This is what I have realised too. I am learning to fill my space with more love, leaving no room for abuse.

     2. Well said Lee. Everyone has a different measure of what ‘abuse’ is, because we are comparing our experiences to something even worse.. For example, if a woman has a friend or family member who has experienced rape, then she may justify being verbally abused by her partner as something insignificant in comparison to the ‘more severe’ experience another has dealt with. Abuse, as you say, is actually anytime we are not being respectful and considerate to ourselves and any time we are treated with disrespect and disregard by another – we shouldn’t have varying definitions of abuse dependent on our perceptions of how acceptable and normal it is.

        1. This is not too dissimilar to most things human – we compare our un-wellness to severe health crisis and dehabilitating illness to champion how well we are doing and that everything is ‘normal’…and we justify away pretty much any irresponsible behaviour as ‘normal’, and what everyone else is doing and too often strive to be the same to not rock the boat or challenge the status quo. Thank God for those who are willing to reflect on their patterns of behaviour as Christina has offered, learn, evolve and reflect a needed true way for others out of this thickly false fog.

        2. I really love what you say here Susie, because it is so so important that we don’t compare with another or even with ourselves, as in it is better now than it was before. Abuse is abuse regardless of how bad it was last year or how bad someone else is suffering.

        3. Your last sentence is gold Susie “we shouldn’t have varying definitions of abuse dependent on our perceptions of how acceptable and normal it is.” Abuse is abuse, no matter in which form or colour or intensity the abuse appears.

     3. As you have said Lee – abuse is anytime we are not living the love we are but sadly so much of what we live is abusive and has been accepted as ‘normal’. As we build our re- connection back to who we truly are, what is true will become clearer and the old hooks will no longer work. Thanks Christina for your blog.

     4. ‘abuse is anytime we are not living the love that we are.’ Simply expressed and true Lee.

     5. Absolutely Lee, and the more aware we become, the more refined we notice this abuse can be… but it it can a joyful exploration with ourselves and our bodies to call out the sneaky ways we abandon ourselves and abuse our bodies. Something I’m learning to be more and more with myself, because the moment I harden and go ‘doh’, ‘I’m an idiot’, ‘look at what you’ve done’ I’ve cemented the self-flagellation pattern again and oh, how awful this feels in my body.

     6. Yes great point Lee, we each have our own patterns of abuse and once we experience ourselves free of those activities, it is very painful and obvious when we choose to go back into them… an inevitable part of the learning process for us it would seem, until we learn to be truly loving in all our ways.

474. Doing it by myself to be the independent woman, otherwise people could say that I was weak and oversensitive. No way, so that is what I have done overriding the delicate and sensitive nature of my body, blaming my body for not keeping up. Delicateness, how precious we are and so beautiful!

     1. I agree Annelies, I have experienced the same. The more I get to know how delicate my body is the more I cannot believe how I used to live.

        1. Well said Amina, I feel the same. I often have moments where I’m in disbelief that I overrode such incredible gentleness.

     2. Yes Annelise, I can relate to this. I remember even as a child I was known as being independent, not wanting help from anyone and it was because I knew if I let someone else do something for me it wouldn’t be done how I wanted it done – it wouldn’t feel right. So I continued to do things for myself and have done so all my life, but in doing so became tough and hard and mistrusting of others. I ended up feeling that I had no support. But I have realised now that this was abusive to myself, and it had nothing to do with other people. It is quite shocking to really feel how much we override the delicate and tender nature of our bodies in order to appear to be independent and capable, but at what expense?

        1. Yes Sandra, it is very abusive to ourselves and I can still feel this in my attitude regarding my work, not want to bother any one else when I feel it is too much for my body, it is just pride but the question is like you say ‘but at what expense?’ It is feeling that it is not only abusive to myself but at the same time towards everyone else, I am aware that is the responsibility I have.

        2. I agree Annelise, we do have a responsibility to listen to our bodies and therefore not be abusive towards ourselves, because of the knock on effect that it has.

     3. Annelies, I love this “…blaming our body for not keeping up..” when the whole time it was screaming to stop. Thank god for our bodies, without them it is disturbing to think how out of control we could get. If our cars break down we ask questions, if our bodies break down we demand to be fixed so we can continue doing what we did before.

        1. Yes Laura, that is the level of disregard we live in, our cars seem to be more important than the vehicle we live in.

     4. Annelies, I too have let go of the ‘independent woman’ in me, appreciating my delicateness and started asking for help, rather than put stress on my body. I can’t imagine why I didn’t do this before.

        1. Yes it’s a good point kehinde2012… we have not even begun to question or understand WHY we have not been able to see what has become so clear and apparent now in so many ways… including what we have been prepared to do to our bodies just to get a job done. There is so much for us to understand as a society about the way things are… thank goodness for Serge Benhayon and all of what’s taught through Universal Medicine as this has led the way for what you and I, and so many others can now feel and see.

     5. I can relate Annelies and Amina, and what I also came to realise is how much i would dismiss the delicateness and tenderness that I innately feel, that i actually am. I used to think it was not enough. It’s been a steady process of unpacking all those ill-held beliefs and letting them go, claiming the true strength and power that delicateness brings to myself and others, and enjoying how I feel from and in my body with every move. The moment I think I need to be something ‘more’, I can hear it in my voice and feel it in my body’s movements, and it feels awful. It’s a tell-tale sign of leaving my body, abusing it, and a moment to come back.

475. Loved your blog Christina as it had me contemplating how much we allow abuse in just for the sake of being seen to be nice, accomodating or even ‘right’ in the eyes of others. Yet when we live this way we harm ourselves most as we are not truly honouring how we feel and instead are ticking boxes to be seen or recognised by others or meeting their expectations, ideals and beliefs. I loved how you shared that ‘The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.’ which brings to light how important it is to develop a true and loving relationship with self first and foremost. Awesome blog!

     1. I feel the same Jade, reading this article made me contemplate how much I do to please others even if it does not feel true, today I was feeling poorly and called worked to say I was sick, normally I would have been very apologetic and probably felt guilty for letting everyone down and so gone into work anyway so I would be seen as reliable and someone that can be counted on, but I put myself first and said I couldn’t work, this felt lovely to be looking after myself in this way and not feeling guilty about it.

        1. Amazing Rebecca! That is an enormous step. It’s something I too have been experimenting with, not feeling the need to justify myself all the time and honouring what is needed for my own body.

        2. Rebecca, to put yourself first in the way that you did without feeling guilty is a huge. It’s very easy to get caught in the energy of wanting to please others and be seen as someone reliable that can be counted on. Listening to your body and giving it the rest it needs supports and replenishes you, and ultimately this benefits both you and the company you work for.

        3. That’s great Rebecca and just goes to show how our ingrained beliefs around being seen to be good or reliable etc can take us so far away from the truth of our bodies. Our bodies are our vehicles of expression if we are not supporting them with love and care we are allowing abuse to reign free.

     2. Today at work i realize at times I gave other people more attention than myself so I made the connection to other people more important than the connection to myself. This brings it back to Christinas quote “‘The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.’ “

        1. How True this is that when we are breathing the everything of everyone else, we are no longer with us and our body’s knowing and natural harmony – we have already jumped ship in that moment.

     3. Our old habits can have a surprisingly strong momentum. Some go simply with awareness, others go simply by stating we don’t want them any more but others yet require a lot of awareness and love for ourselves until they dissolve.

        1. Yes its true Christoph, the really deep ones that we have chosen for life times can take some shifting! It takes real focus and dedication to become aware of just how we allow them to rule our lives and to then put a halt to the behaviour. Christina’s blog beautifully highlights those places where something deeper is still in control and what an amazing revelation it can be when we honestly own and expose this ancient choice so that we can begin healing the causes behind it.

        2. Yes agree Christoph, sometimes we have to take ourselves by the hand with a deeper love and understanding as we re- step each movement with a true and loving momentum.

     4. Yes Jade, and it reminds me again and again, that being me is enough. We don’t have to do something, to get recognition. Everything that we need is inside us.

476. Thanks Christina – I can easily relate to what you have talked about. Although I have made a lot of changes in recent years I can still shock myself by easily slipping back to old habits of wanting to get a job done/please others etc at the expense of my body. At the time it seems like the drive I am in drowns out all other considerations but afterwards I question why on earth I would allow myself to be put in that position. It’s taking some time to let go of the ideals and beliefs that are attached here but I’m blown away each time I slip up as it exposes the degree to which I had been living with this type of dogma day in day out believing I was on the right track. And to think that the majority of of the world lives in this illusion!

     1. I find the same Helen Giles. As I pay more attention to the impact of my choices on myself and everyone around me and as I take more responsibility for the choices I make, the ones that are not based on this foundation stick out. And I am finding that it is a deepening understanding and relationship because some things I might find okay at some point very soon after might start to feel completely unacceptable.

477. In reading this I felt it could have been me writing it. I so relate Christina to every word. The number of times I put my body on the line to prove that I was enough was countless. Yet I love how you bring the point that even ‘being nice’ to be liked at the expense of being yourself is also self-abuse, same spectrum just different ends. Thanks Christina, so much is revealed here.

     1. And putting our body on the line need not be in a dramatic or extreme manner – it can be the simple process of negating our deep knowing. Every move away from Truth or living in accordance with our true harmony is putting our body on the line.

        1. Very true Deborah. Putting your body on the line is even the smallest step away from living what is true.

        2. Thanks Deborah, you’ve nailed it with what you’ve expressed here. Abusing our body does come down to that — negating our deep knowing. Our bodies are designed divinely so to be harmonious, to move harmoniously. When we invite something in, a thought that jars this harmony what we are inviting in, is abuse.

        3. We fragment and disturb our inner sanctuary by allowing abuse and then we deepen this disturbance and our outer sphere when we allow this abuse with us in our everyday movement and expression.

     2. I think most of us can relate to this story. Particularly the ‘being nice’ disease, which I have played into for an (ongoing) big part of my life. It really is amazing how far away from our selves we are willing to go to please others, always at our own expense.

     3. This blog indeed reveals how much we are conditioned to do what is asked or expected in order to get the job done. But really who is this for and at what expense to ourselves. Christina has opened up a whole new level of self care and listening to the bodies natural wisdom.

     4. I loved that point to Sara, it showed how we can sneakily try and disguise abuse by putting it on a scale, which only allows it to keep going. It was a great example that shows if it’s not love then it can only be abuse, no way round it.

     5. Well said Sara, I too can relate to this. There are so many levels and details of abuse. Once we have said no to the more obvious ones, the task then becomes to start to identify and systematically say no to the subtler and more refined forms of abuse we have allowed.

478. ‘Every need it has, and all the love I have in me, my body expresses with beauty and grace – far beyond any demands or expectations. In short, it is my pure and solid partner.’
     True Christina and before I came to Universal Medicine I thought I treated my body with care but that was pure illusion. It is still an amazing unfolding and I start to appreciate my body for the signals it is giving me so I can let go of what is not true and ‘Let love be the fuel that runs my engine’.

     1. Annelies I too thought that I treated my body with care and yet now, looking back it was utter neglect. It still astonishes me that what I thought was black was actually white. We have to ask ourselves the question ‘what really is going on, that we can be abusing ourselves on a world wide scale and be seemingly oblivious to the fact?’

        1. And I am sure Alexis what we feel is self-loving today, may feel like abuse in another year’s time. The benchmark is always changing as we develop and deepen the love for ourselves.

     2. Yes Annelise. I am finding that even though I know what I know now about treating my body with more care and tenderness than I ever have done in the past, there are still levels of deeper care and tenderness with myself that I am only just beginning to touch on. To allow oursleves to really feel these new levels of love for oursleves is an enormous gift and one that needs to be treasured everyday. As Christina so beautifully says ‘Let love be the fuel that runs my engine’.

        1. Yes Sandra, it is a constant unfolding and I am aware that sometimes there is a resistance to go deeper with myself and then again I have to make the choice and feel that there is a lack of self worth coming up. And to just treat my body with more care and tenderness is enough to feel I am truly worth nurturing myself in every way possible.

     3. Annelies I am realising even after all these years of being a Universal Medicine student I am refining ongoing-ly my levels of self care and realising I have barely touched the surface when it comes to appreciating what my body is offering me in reflection. It is a constant evolutionary process to return to the Wisdom my body knows.

        1. That’s the word Merrilee,’refining’ and also to open my eyes for where I choose to not feel the disregard and abuse to my body when I stay on a level that feels comfortable.

479. ‘Jumping’ can be such an automatic response. Like many I also have pushed my body beyond its loving harmonious natural way to achieve a certain result, for recognition, fitness level etc. It is only since coming back to the wisdom of my body and truly feeling how different choices effect it am I now able to accept that to do anything against the body is actually abusive. The body continues to show me the subtleties of abuse that my mind would once have accepted as ‘normal’. I really enjoyed reading your blog Christina thank you.

     1. What stand out for me in your comment was “to achieve a certain result” and I realize how this little thing, to be looking for a result, is degenerate. It leads us into the disaster – away from our self-loving way.

        1. GREAT point you make here Sandra as our whole world is results driven and so we’re expected to look for a result. To not have that as a goal is seen as bizarre even abnormal, BUT YOU are right being results driven does lead to disaster and sets us up to fail.

        2. Yes Sandra super perceptive comment, once we’re attached to the idea of an outcome it becomes about that and all other considerations are sacrificed to achieve it, especially our body. In fact, we consider our body, if it does not respond in how we expect to achieve that outcome, to have let us down – it just shows how crazy it is, the one thing that shows us how to live and be in harmony, our body is the thing we push aside once we set our eyes on that outer result, once it becomes the all. And it’s not about not doing things in life, it’s about doing them in a way that honours and is from our bodies, it’s a very different way.

        3. The moment we make it about ‘something’ and not ‘someone’, what I mean is, the moment what I do is not about people but a result I want to reach – I am gone because my true purpose is gone. A wise man said once: there is no such thing as ‘a chair’ – just ‘someone’s seat’. Such a simple statement but how profound if we live by it.

        4. It’s about people, I love that Sandra and that image you give, it’s not a chair but someone’s seat – I needed a little reminding of this today.

        5. Our bodies do not recognise or pay heed to outcomes. The only things our bodies respond to is the universal order of love and truth. Hence the tension we feel when we want an outcome (which comes from our minds) but our bodies are in alignment with something else much grander that has nothing to do with outcomes.

        6. HA! What a great delivering Andrew. Yes, the tension we get is because we are already aligned to a pull, the pull towards God, back to our divinity and by bringing in an unnatural other move (towards an outcome we ‘think’ should be) we go against our natural flow.

        7. Well observed Sandra. I listened to interviews with boxers yesterday after one was injured and placed in an induced coma following repeated punches to the head during a boxing match. Most justified the brutality of the ‘sport’ as the price they pay to win: the end justifies the means mentality. For one boxer the ultimate result was winning and prize money that had bought him the life-style he desired: fame, luxury, homes, cars. Damage to the body was secondary to material rewards.

        8. And this man is possibly a role model for so many too.. A celebrity figure once said something like “I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer”. This realization you can get when you’ve got everything you ever wanted and then see: it is not it. Sometimes we learn the hard way to find out (i.e. abuse yourself to become famous and rich) to see where we are right now. We will not ‘get’ what we are truly longing for by abuse in any way.

        9. Sandra, millions would have watched that interview. The search for wealth and fame is superficial, the real search is for self, but people don’t know this, until they find themselves asking after they’ve made it ‘is this it?’ It can be other areas as well, like the quest to achieve success through qualifications and then when you get there feeling no better within. The real journey or quest, is choosing love, not abuse and navigation a clear path through multiple distractions to steer us away from being true to ourselves.

        10. I agree from my heart Kehinde: The real journey… is choosing love 🙂

        11. If it were not true Kehinde, it would be unbelievable that we have come so far from being willing to see that our body is the marker of truth for us. As we become more familiar with our connection to our body we are more willing to see that past abuse has caused such deep harm to both our body and held back our evolution. The world has moved so far from the truth that we seek rewards to compensate for our inner pain and hurts.

        12. “To achieve a certain result” is a drive, a push. I’m becoming more and more aware how often I’m in a driving modus. For a long time this has been 2nd nature, thinking that it was actually normal. The drives are sometimes very subtle, but what they’ve got in common is that they drain me dramatically. And all along I was actually aware, but allowed it to basically run my life. There’s nothing to achieve. That might be ridiculous when reading for the first time, but what I’ve experienced and am experiencing is that the more I let go of any ‘desired result’, the more the magnificenses of life reveal themselves.

        13. I made the same experiences Floris, by letting go of the ‘desired result’, but commit to life in full (work, relationships) – what is needed comes to me.

        14. I love what you say about a chair, Sandra. And of course! There had to be someone wanting to sit for a chair to exist in the first place. So many things, we only look at what we have ended up with as a form, and forget its original purpose. Just like getting so caught up in bettering our life, and totally forgetting what life is all about.

        15. Looks like ‘better’ is not it – just like ‘sheltered’ or ‘protection’ is not it (like mentioned in the blog “Does Growing up Sheltered Protect you from the World?” – http://bit.ly/1opP270).
            To discover by and by that our world is not working like we think is very churning up – in the best way! It is an enlightenment.

        16. The only True way of living Sandra. Surrendering and allow life to come to us. And in that, Life itself will teach us exactly whatever we choose to be taught. How amazing is that!

        17. Yes, ‘life’ will teach us – if necessary… I have found I can either make it about love, or not… it is simply a choice!

        18. What a simple example of the chair being irrelevant until someone sits on it and it then has a purpose… I love it!

        19. Yeah – things are nothing if not related to a being.

        20. Life is about people not things or results. The moment we hold this perspective and become truly self-loving we cannot ignore or abuse our bodies.

        21. We know that from modern psychology as well that when we make it about people, when we feel the other as a person it becomes more difficult to harm. That’s why kidnap victims should talk about themselves and make them appreciable. The moment we clock the other as person we start to feel our connection and in true connection we will not harm – neither others or ourselves.

        22. And the more I choose Love, the more life reflects Love back to me in all different ways and forms, showing and confirming me that I can rely on life, that I can let go of control and that surrendering is in fact the only True way forth. Wow, I’m in deep Awe with life and it’s magnificence…

     2. Our bodies are the essential guide to what is abuse Victoria I agree and lately I too have been more aware how my body “continues to show me the subtleties of abuse that my mind would once have accepted as ‘normal’.” Today I have a cold and am feeling very delicate. I have been to work today and discovered in the process of not pushing my body to do the usual things, that doing jobs with two people rather than one is so much more efficient, gentler and tender. The lesson learned is “ask for help more often so that pushing my body is not called for in the first place.” Who are we trying to impress anyway?

        1. Beautiful Rowena, there is nothing to prove or anyone to impress, only ourselves to honour, which in truth honours us all.

        2. Good point Rowena, who are we trying to impress and does the effort of trying to impress actually help us or others in any way shape or form – no. In fact if anything it harms because we are reflecting back to others a harmful way of being.

        3. I agree Rowena this whole notion of asking for support when we need it and admitting our fragility is a big one. There is such a strong belief in the world of being independent and resilient and not needing anyone else and I know I fall for that one sometimes too.

        4. Enjoyed your sharing Rowena – particularly the lesson learned is ‘ask for help more often’ Something I held back from requesting for decades. Yes ‘who are we trying to impress’? Where do we learn this habit from? Is it another coping strategy. Realising now I only asked for help when I was in pain or laying flat out otherwise, the push to carry on remained even after the pain subsided (only to come back another time). Still learning those lessons but, as more self-love is lived asking for help/support is becoming much easier.

        5. Recognition is needed when we are not connected to who we truly are. Our spirit want us to be able to do anything because it chose separation in the first place and so ‘have’ to do anything on its own (what is not possible). Our bodies know that we are designed to live and work in brotherhood. And we feel the difference of course.

     3. This is so true what you say Ariana. It is definitely time for humanity to wise-up to the wisdom of the body.

     4. Indeed Victoria I can relate so much to jumping into things which have not been right for me out of a sense of duty, obligation and responsibility for others. Just as Christina mentioned the need to do things right can be a social rule that drives us in ways which are abusive to our bodies and not our natural movements in life.

     5. Love this Ariana, ‘smart’ has got us nowhere, it is the wisdom of the body that will take us home.

     6. The subtleties is where the powerful learning and understanding comes in to guide us to our true and new normal which is found in a body that is truly vital from being honoured, loved and nurtured for the wisdom and intelligence that it lives, in each moment of every day.

        1. Yes Cherise, and so beautifully expressed.

     7. I love your comment very much Ariana: “. . . to accept that the body has far greater wisdom that we can get from our so called ‘smart’ heads.” It is really out to be smart that was yesterday – today it is in to be present in our bodies!

        1. Good point Ariana – “The statistics tell us that 95% of the population are sick today, with one illness or disease or other.” And most of us still think that we can think us out of this problem . . .

     8. This is a great point you make here Ariana, that we ‘think’ we know best because that is what our minds are telling us and we have been conditioned to ‘think’ that it is our minds that we should listen to. However it is our bodies that hold the wisdom of knowing what they need to support them and what does not. It is time for us to stop listening to our minds, and pay more attention to what our bodies are telling us.

     9. And I find it so amazing, that we can refine our relationship to our body every day. It doesn’t seem that there is an end. The more I listen to my body, the more I receive messages from my body – it is just magic.

        1. I agree alexander1207, we have been fooled that our intelligence springs from the mind when it comes from every cell in our body? What a revelation..

     10. That’s the truth Ariana, our minds have led us astray from the Wisdom that’s in our hearts!

480. Christina, thank you for sharing about what we have come to see as normal, and for joining Serge Benhayon in standing up for the sometimes inconvenient and uncomfortable truth. We protect our abuse as it is a way of staying in our identification in many different ways and forms and we have made a deal together to make this normal. It takes a lot of lived love to consistently and steadily show a different way that one day will become the normal.

481. There are a trillion ways to abuse, and to reflect this to others as the standard norm – we need only open our eyes, or not and it abounds in every pocket within society, within our homes, and comes at us from every angle. It is curious that we are bedfellows with abuse and seek comfort in this when our nature is absolute love and the polar opposite of such energy. This highlights to me how as Humanity we drain ourselves constantly to call in the force and dampness of abuse in order to negate our ceaseless divinity and wisdom and in doing so forge an ingrained path of irresponsilbity.

482. Today I was talking to a 7 year old about what I do and do not eat. I told her my mouth really liked some things but my belly did not. She said ‘then that is tough luck for you mouth but really lucky for your belly” You cannot beat the wisdom and simplicity of a 7 year old.

     1. I love the communication with children too Elizabeth, they remind me of how simple truth is. I heard myself say to her that the food stays much longer in my belly then in my mouth so the choice should be easy, what a great reminder to myself!

483. Our body ‘navigates us through life like a compass’ this is so true and it is without fail if we learn not to interfere with what it is telling us because of what we think, want or prefer for ourselves.

484. Thank you Christina for a great blog, in reading these words I am reminded of the enormity of abuse that happens on a day to day basis when I am not with myself in all that I do. ” there is a way of reconfiguring the ‘normal’ to stop the constant abuse we are all in. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are. “

485. Christina – you have exposed the illusion we are all in that whilst we believe we are living what is true – are we really? The layers of old beliefs, ideals and the stories we make up to make us believe what we are living, are like the number of layers we put on to stay warm in winter. We can peel off one layer and feel we have connected to the truth, only to find there is another layer and then yet another layer. The truth can be sensed and if we allow ‘space’ for this to be felt, we will know what truth truly is for us and live it. Thank you for exposing the illusion of living ‘truth’ when sometimes all we have done is to change the level of ‘Comfort’ we are in.

486. Its crazy, we live in a body that is sensitive, tender and delicate and we have a will that is out of control. we need to honour our body and our sensitivity if we are ever to know our truth or the truth of humanity.

487. What you describe here about abuse is the most true level of abuse. Thank you for bringing this truth and with that, reflecting that 99,9 percent of humanity is living in self-abuse.

488. Christina there are many solid reminders here to continue listening to the body to uncover what is loving, as opposed to following beliefs and ideals and receiving recognition at any cost. As you have pointed out, it can be subtle or obvious choices that hurt us, and each can have a very harmful affect on both our body and being.

489. This is so true Elizabeth. I too felt that constant connection to my body is all important and how each time I have made an ill choice for myself, it has been when I have been disregarding how my body feels or might feel as a consequence of my action.

490. Thank you Christina for your sharing. Yes, the need for recognition and acceptance really has had me live in a way that totally ignores the needs of my own body also. Not so obviously dramatic as jumping off a roof but just as detrimental just the same. This disconnected way of living really puts the body on the front line of a battle field.

491. “The only truthful ‘making it right’ is to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine.”. And in order to feel first there needs to be an established connection with our own body. Without this connection I can pretend that I’m feeling, but whatever will come through me, will not be the Divine expression and Love it otherwise would be. It took me years and a lot of choices to come back to my own Love. For a long time I thought that I would be the only one who could do it without feeling. Arrogant? Yes, very. Starting to really feel from moment to moment is something I’ve been looking for all my life to be honest. And the more I am connected to me, the more I connect to the comfort that is and lives inside a lot of people. A lot of fatty tummies hold a lot of comfort I’ve become aware of. And as I’m more connecting, I can also more appreciate myself and the choices that I made as I once was a man with such a fatty tummy.

492. This redefines the definition of abuse entirely. No longer is it just about an act, it is about the energy that makes the act what it is. Even if it is nice on the outside, there is no excuse for an ill energy or intent as this is abuse at the highest level.

493. Abuse happens whenever we are not truly aware of ourselves. This is so true for me too, Christina. There is very obvious abuse which is easy to spot but what we do to ourselves on a daily basis is not always clocked as abuse. Putting my body into disregard is abuse and i can feel it ever so subtlety in my body. Thank you for reminding me again about how important it is to feel and nominate this.

     1. I agree, nominating what we allow as abuse in our lives is powerful, no judgment, no regret, no sadness required. Naming what is not love allows us to let go of it and chose another way.

     2. So true Anne. Thank you Christina for the support of your such an honest and real blog.

494. ‘Why did I fall back into “I can do it”? Why do I put outside demands in front of respecting me? Why do I think I am not enough being me?’ These are GREAT questions and ones we don’t stop enough to ask and contemplate. Thank you for exposing the various ways that we can self-abuse, that we as a society have accepted as normal behaviour.

     1. They are awesome questions. Thank you Shevon for highlighting them more.

495. We have not truly allowed ourselves to feel how deeply supportive our relationship with the body can be, it holds the key to our power, to all the wisdom of this world and to our health and well-being – it truly is worth treasuring.

496. “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking”. This is a great revelation Christina – our minds seems to want to only focus on the dramatic events, and as I was reading about the roof I noticed a smugness that I don’t jump roofs so I am alright! Yet I know my body has been in reaction and trauma because of other more subtle choices I have been making. The fact is that as you say whenever we push our self and our body against the truth we feel, it is still abuse and it is deeply felt and registered by our body.

497. Again this is HUGE, “And the need to get the recognition”, how many of us do this simply to get recognition, rather than feel our own lack of self love or as a substitute for the love we don’t feel from those around us – in the sense that we get recognised for what we do, rather than who we are. It doesn’t have to be jumping off a roof, it can be anything, work, running a marathon, creating drama, being good at sport, illness, being ‘clever’, painting a picture – it can be even more subtle than that. And the thing is it starts so young, I see kids in school already seeking recognition as young as 7 or 8. I imagine for some it starts way earlier than this, after the first poo in a potty.

498. “I used to push myself and my body really hard all my life, living in the belief that “I am strong, I can do that, and I’ll make it without any help.” Trying to show how independent I was as a woman, somehow trying to prove that “I can do it!” Oh man, I can totally relate to this, big time – I abused my body. I used to train really hard in the gym or at fitness classes, trying to prove my worth, that I could lift the heavy weights, do full push ups and be like the guys. A bit like, if you can do it, so can I. All this came from a lack of self worth. I didn’t appreciate and honour my body or my delicateness.

499. This is HUGE! ‘Self-abuse Under the Umbrella of Making it Right’ – I’ve not even read the article yet but how much does this relate to everybody – how we eat, work, exercise, sleep, be in relationship, families, treat ourselves, our bodies and other people. So often we think we are doing the right thing, but it’s actually deeply deeply harming.

     1. This reminds me Gyl of how many forgo what their body is telling them when it comes to family parties or being invited over friends places for dinner. I’ve had people say to me ‘you can’t not eat what someone has cooked for you!’ or ‘you wouldn’t say no would you?!’. Being ‘nice’ or the perfect guest to make everyone comfortable is deeply harming to ourselves and this also reflects to others to eat, drink or do whatever is asked of you.

500. Christina, it’s great how you were able to see your car accident as putting a stop to the momentum of your life as you lived it so far and see it, without any blame, as a necessary stop to take stock and let go of what was not working for you. Often so-called disasters can be a blessing in disguise if we are able to feel, as you did, what they are offering us.

     1. I agree Sandra, when looking back it is amazing how accidents or trauma have brought an end to a way of living that was unloving or unsupportive, or it offered lessons and insights previously unnoticed that were deeply healing to embrace.

501. “… let love be the fuel that runs my engine.” Christina, this is beautiful – what a different world it would be if we had love as our fuel and loving expression as our currency.

502. Thank you Christina, and the more we choose to move with love the quicker our body is to let us know that we are abusing ourselves.

     1. I love the simplicity in that Mary for what is not love can’t but be exposed.

503. It’s amazing to feel how deeply entrenched some of our beliefs and behaviours can be with what you’ve shared here Christina and how the desire to achieve can overwhelm what we know to be a poor choice for our body.

504. What a great example of our body’s knowing and our deep wisdom – what we are capable of at great expense to the body when we ignore it’s voice and run it rogue and in contrast how it feels to honour and cherish our every movement and breath.

505. Christina.. this is EXACTLY what I needed to hear. Thanking you to the moon and back for taking the time to share this with us all.

506. Very inspiring to read your blog Christina and equally confronting when we start looking more honestly how much abuse we have accepted in our lives and what abuse is- once we don’t listen to our body and override it for what ever reason we might have.

     1. It is true Janina as it is through our willingness to be honest with ourselves and each other that we can expose and address the subtle ways that we allow and accept abuse into our lives. This is healing for us all as we then are able to accept and allow our tender Love to be the true marker of who we are.

507. ‘Nowhere else outside of Universal Medicine was I ever reflected this truth before, to which my inner heart responds without doubt.’ Exactly for me too Christina. All that you share is of absolute gold. As I too have come to know my body now as also my ‘pure and solid partner’, and as such does not allow for the abuse it used to cop relentlessly.

508. A beautiful example of honouring ourselves in all we are doing and what we feel and the old momentums of not doing this and the hardness we live in as a result. Living from this presence and stillness feels so beautiful as you describe how you have changed and the loving way you now live and the choice to jump from old patterns really does show how we can no longer do this once we make the choice to live in a loving way and the tenderness and fragility we really are. Thank you Christina for an amazing sharing in so many ways.

     1. I agree tricanicholson “…once we make the choice to live in a loving way and the tenderness and fragility we really are.” We are natural sensitive, fragile and tender. A child naturally cry and winces with a bump or a harsh word, as do they also smile with joy from ear to ear when love is shared, as we grow up many of us attempt to cut off our feelings, we numb ourselves. We feel everything around us, and attempting to harden up to the knocks offers only superficial imagined relief and it does much damage as it builds up layers and layers of protection that makes enjoying the joy and love around us less accessible. Coming back to feeling and honouring our bodies and reconnecting with our inner heart and love, offers a window of reconnection, it is our strength and power to honour what we feel.

509. I love this blog Christina. We are constantly tempted to ‘jump’ in this world that encourages us to be better, try harder and do what’s ‘right’. But nothing is more truthful than choosing love and really the rest is just different degrees of abuse… not matter which way we look at it.

     1. I agree, it is a great metaphor, I have felt that push to ‘jump’, it is a very palpable physical sensation to push myself into something that does not feel true to me and I have done it to look strong, look adventurous, be accepted or attempt to feel good about myself, all have been hollow. My true power, acceptance, love, joy and self worth have been found through honouring what my body feels and shares with me.

     2. Absolutely Kathryn and for me it has always been how high do you want me to jump, with an every increasing levels of disregard which ended up in a forever increasing level of injuries. Sense meeting Serge Benhayon my abuse levels have diminished to almost nil and now the injuries are just very minute if at all. The sooner I catch myself going into a situation where my spirit puts me into disregard the easier it has become to see and feel the patterns / ideals or believes from the past and therefore the sooner I heal that issues.

     3. Yes well said Kathryn. When we are not honoring the love we are we are simply dis-honoring ourselves. As you say – ‘nothing is more truthful than choosing love and really the rest is just different degrees of abuse . . . no matter which way we look at it.’

     4. So true Kathryn the world is constantly tempting us to go against our bodies but ‘nothing is more truthful than choosing love and really the rest is just different degrees of abuse…’ The choice is ours and it is great to celebrate and confirm that thanks to the practical presentations of Universal Medicine demonstrating this truth that we have ignored for so long.

510. As I deepen the love that I feel for myself so too has my radar for abuse gone up. Simple actions of what I may of once not have considered in the slightest being abuse I now clock as abuse. Anything that is not love is indeed abuse.

     1. Yes this has been my experience too. There are things I see as abuse now that I would have thought crazy to label as such, and this changes all the time. There is a refinement process that never ends – refining and deepening the connection to the most honest and truthful part of ourselves which does not shy away from naming abuse for what it is – even if it’s something as seemingly benign and harmless as over-eating broccoli for example. Sounds crazy but what I feel now is that any form of over-eating puts a huge strain on my body which is unnecessary and therefore self-abuse.

     2. Yes Donna, anything that is not love is abuse. We come from love so going against our natural way is abuse.

511. Thank you Christina, I now find myself looking at why I used to, jump of roof tops, smash my body playing sports, as well as several car accidents that left me feeling sore for months, all the verbal abuse I would except and then of course all the drugs that I then needed so I could, not feel what was happening in my body. Why would anyone do these ‘crazy things’ and call then “normal” or that is what happens in life because it is actually happening to a lot of people. I still do silly things and get hurt but now the smallest thing puts my pain meter through the ‘roof’, like it truly hurts so much and most times there is not even a scratch. My awareness has improved considerably and with that awareness I feel more of what has always been happening to me I now choose to not numb my body so I can also feel the love, which is my soul, which is the true me.

512. Abuse happens so quickly in a fraction of a second – when my choice doesn’t include my all. I love how you stepped out of the abuse of jumping by really stopping your momentum, not going into blaming yourself but simply asking questions and honestly pondering and moving on.

     1. True Felix, abuse happens quickly, hence the responsibility to stay aware. Anything that dulls our awareness is abuse.

     2. Yes Felix, and because Christina didn’t go into guilt or blame she was able to feel every-thing in her body – the pains and aches but also her sweet gentleness and grace.

513. This is the way it goes: I choose a difference, choose to be lovingly with myself in a way, I claim it and I walk it. All is good. Then ‘life’ comes and challenges my choice, my decision. ‘Life’ around me asks me: really?, your sure? And I found myself struggling or immediately back again in the old, self-abusive way. So it is: my life is not all about me, me, me. What I choose and how I live has an effect and influence on others. We adjust our way of living to each other and so, when one changes in a way, our constellation changes. I found that old constellation can be very strong calling me back. So if I make a choice to change, I have to re-claim it again and again, bring a constant into this so others have to re-adjust or align to it, instead of me being pulled back.
     And that is in fact what we are here for: to pull each other up, offer one lovely choice and harmonious living after the next, till we are living heaven on earth together.

     1. I can relate to all you have written Sandra. I agree it’s vital we keep saying yes to the loving choices we make, and eventually the attraction of the old way is replaced by the pull to live, express and reflect to others, from All of us.

514. Christina a really great blog that takes what we call “abuse” to a whole new depth. I would be caught up in the fact that if I were in that position it would be my job to do what was asked. As you say “I was shocked by how I am automatically used to abusing my body instead of treating it with love” something I feel many of us will resonate with.

     1. That’s a good point David – that we can get caught up in the fact that it might be part of our job to do something we now feel is abusive. But if we just ‘put up and shut up’ ie. go ahead and do it without expressing what we feel, nothing will ever change. If we feel something is abusive, chances are others feel it to, so it’s only by someone caring enough about themselves and others to voice it, to call it out for what it is, that things will change. If we all just go along with it thinking we have to do it because it’s part of our job, then we all continue on the merry-go-round of abuse.

     2. Yes David, I know that I make exceptions for allowing abuse that are circumstantial. I am realising that as I write this comment that when I leave the door open for exceptions then there will always be the opening for abuse to come in. Closing all of these doors completely is the only way to fully say no to abuse.

515. Christina – you raise such am important point here in that pushing your body can be done in several ways. physically and mentally it is still the same thing, we go against what the body feels. It’s just that when you jumped off the building, it was perhaps easier to feel the pain of your body – but being ‘nice’ to people is actually worse because we may not necessarily have a direct physical reaction. But as you say – it is one in the same. These is so much that our bodies can offer us if we simply listen to them – and being nice is one of the most common to look at – being honest first before we play a role.

516. Thank you Christina for this awesome blog. I had pushed my body beyond what it should do, made it a slave of my mind for many years as you did. Sometimes to please or appease others, sometimes to be seen to being ‘amazing’, sometimes wanting people to applaud me for how tough I was in hard situations. Never taking my body into account at all. Needless to say I lived with a lot of pain, headaches and anxiety.
     Finding Universal Medicine and the work of Serge Benhayon has been a paradigm shift for me too and I have been totally inspired to lovingly listen to and care for my body and not allow my head to dominate and over-ride it any more. It is an ongoing experiment that is getting simpler and more fun as I let go of the old disregarding ways bit by bit. My body thanks me every day and shows me very clearly and quickly whenever I slip into abuse of any sort.

517. There is a saying ‘why wait’. The saying alludes to why wait to change tomorrow.

     When we put things off we calculate that we can catch up what we would have missed out of the day before when we had the opportunity to change then. But the fact is we don’t know what would or wouldn’t have happen because as this blog shares with each you deepen level of awareness a new layer is uncovered.

     Thereby until we make the next step the step after that isn’t known to us. Its like opening one door at a time and the next door you open had something spectacular behind it but we decide to wait for another time because it just another door.

     Thereby we are lying to ourselves if we can ever justify or reason what we have missed out on when we wait to open the next door.

518. I have to admit, jumping off a roof is something that I would be very attracted to do despite the consequences that Christina describes.

519. Serge Benhayon is an absolute inspiration, he doesn’t hold back he says how it is. Truth is more important to him than being liked, it turns out though that a lot more people want the truth.

520. We tend to like umbrellas for their capacity to protect us. Thanks to them we stay how we were. Yet, as this blog makes clear, if abuse is part of our repertoire our umbrella will also protect it.

     1. Great point Eduardo – if we think we are protected there is no motivation to change what is truth does not serve us, let alone even consider we may be harming ourselves or others expressing from under our facade.

521. I have behaved in a very similar way sometimes Christina, we simply haven’t realised what a deep running thread this is. So we continue on with more extreme choices until we really feel the self abuse, and once truly, eventually felt in the body, we learn and know from now on we’ll never do that amount of harm again. How great the body is to show that depth to us.

522. I watched a program last night about some former athletes doing a various physical challenges. One was vomiting after a big swim. One was running in pain because he had pins in his ankle from previous injuries. Another had a hamstring injury, which he ignored, despite knowing more damage could be caused by continuing. The athlete that stood out was the one that actually refused to do the big swim and chose to walk rather than run the muddy 21-mile hill run. The others in the team as well as by the TV program commentator ridiculed him. Here was someone daring to stand out because he wanted to be more respectful towards his body.

523. The transition from treating the body in tune with the majority of human beings to realise that is a sensitive vehicle and it deserves to be treated with utmost delicacy is a profound grace-filled movement.

     1. Indeed Eduardo and one that I deeply cherish.

     2. So very true and beautifully expressed Eduardo, ‘a profound grace-filled movement’.

     3. Love this… we indeed possess sensitive vehicles that deserve to be treated with the utmost delicacy and profound grace-filled movements that honour and cherish it accordingly. We deserve nothing less.

     4. Beautifully said our sensitive vehicles deserve delicate and grace-filled movements, only then can we develop true movement and live by our Soul and render the spirit naught.

524. Great blog Christina – I’m sure that a lot of women have this same belief – that they have to be able to do everything, even at the expense of themselves, in order to fit in or be respected. But what is interesting is that men do this too – it is like we are all trying to fit in with each other and what’s ‘normal’, but the normal that we have created as men and women is not good for us – what a crazy cycle.

525. We may not need to jump off a roof to abuse ourselves. The abuse menu comprises, maxi abuse, plain abuse, moderate abuse, small abuse and sneaky abuse. Each of them is the answer to something that perhaps is different. Yet, they are all abuse against self.

526. ‘Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal.’ This is very true Christina. Making it all about love is not normal in today’s society, so when someone does, they stand out, and I know I have a habit of not wanting to stand out. More of us need to dare to stand out and know that when we do, we are deeply caring for ourselves as well as inspiring others to see there is another way.

527. I love what your blog is showing us Christina. Doing the right thing, the preconceived thing, that will get us recognised and satisfy our own needs, is a huge sacrifice of our natural sensitivity and our body. So, how much more nurturing will work be when we take ourselves there with this in mind.

528. Wow, Christina you have uncovered the mess humanity is in – abuse and self-abuse – how many of us do things to be recognised or identified and our bodies pay the price as well as society as a whole, because most of humanity is living this way. When we feel into our bodies first then there would be no abuse, no wars, no disputes, no arguments and the love that we are would reign and the world changed forever. Simple! Thank you.

529. It is hard to break old habits, and as you describe Christina, they can resurface in a moment, even after years of not doing that behaviour. I have had that experience many times. Thank you for your honest sharing. We need to be lovingly diligent, and aware so that we can keep questioning our motivation for every action.

530. Smiling as I read “Let love be the fuel that runs my engine”. What a beautiful smooth ride it would be – it would certainly make for a less bumpy ride! 🙂 (work in progress) Thank you Christina.

531. That “umbrella of making it right” I know so very well and remember the stress and strain that it brought into my life; being driven by the need to make it right or get it right, is so very, very exhausting and yes it is “self abusive”. But sadly it is an ideal that has become a normal part of the way we live. Knowing that there is another way to live and that this way has truth as its foundation, has been the most amazing support for me as I slowly let go of this destructive and exhausting ideal.

532. Thank you Christina, your blog is timely because, like you, I am discovering layers of abuse that are subtle but nevertheless abuse. I came across a beautiful quote the other day that reminded me the soul cannot enter a body that is not love, and therefore, if there is any abuse in my body, I am not allowing that connection. Abuse can be how I think about myself or another, eating more than I need, making my body go hard when I am preparing food and cutting vegetables, even how I push internally when I go to the toilet. Every move, every thought, everything about my body is tenderness and if I am not living that, then I am living in an abusive way.

     1. ” the soul cannot enter a body that is not love”, what a beautiful reminder Carmel to treat the body as the temple that it is.

533. Let love be the fuel that runs my engine; what a stupendous slogan and one that I shall adopt from here on in.

     1. Letting “love be the fuel that runs my engine”, love that, in doing so it will be obvious whenever I try to put anything less than love into it.

     2. YES and a love fueled engine cannot run individually it only works in brotherhood!

534. I feel many will recognise what you are sharing here Christina – pushing ourselves too far to get it ‘right’ or do the right thing and what we perceive that to be at the time of making any decision, being ruled by our heads and not our hearts. Without listening to our bodies first this great gift that never lies of our true way of living life.

535. Thank you for sharing this Christina, and exposing that there is no difference in effect between jumping off a rooftop or ‘talking to someone to ‘be nice’’ as they can both be an abuse of our bodies. We need to have an ever evolving relationship with our body, because as we cut out behaviours that feel harmful and destructive, such as partying and drinking in your case, then the smaller, hidden behaviours are shown up, which can cause equal if not more damage to how we feel.

     1. Yes great points Susie, ‘being nice’ can even be more detrimental than doing something so obviously dangerous as jumping off a roof top as you can adopt this behaviour, at the expense of the body, as a constant way of being until you are convinced that this is just how you are. Living in this way you have to ignore all messages from your body so as to accommodate everyone else’s needs before your own.

536. This is a great blog for me to read as although I am so much more gentle and aware of what my body can and can’t do and what is true or harming I often fall back into default mode at work and lift things that should really take two people, or not stopping to rest when my body indicates one is needed.

537. The ‘I can do it’ attitude you describe is huge – the drive and push to go beyond our limits and boundaries, to prove we can and get the recognition. How sad is it that we have set up a world where to abuse your body is to be recognised and praised!

     1. Absolutely Rebecca it is very sad, but it is the deal with individuality that keeps us choosing abuse over love. Love does not know individuality, but abuse lives of the individual drama.

        1. Well said – with love, their is no me and you – their is the unique expression, but not what we have today where everyone strives to be individual and recognised as that.

538. The truth reflected, or not held back by Serge Benhayon, even though it maybe very difficult to take in sometimes is the fresh air that mankind needs to wake us up out of the dullness we have been living in for so long. How true that the normal you write about is so often just huge illusion.

539. Wow Christina, great story. The old pattern for most of us is to ‘jump’ when someone says ‘jump’, and you literally did! What an amazing symbol and reflection for you that allowed you to really feel what we do to ourselves.

540. Thank you Christina, I really enjoyed reading this but at the same time could feel my own choices in my body where I have pushed through at my bodies expense, and I didn’t have to jump off a roof to achieve this, just pushing to finish my paperwork at work. It seems that it doesn’t matter what flavour we push with, just the fact that we override and put the body second.

541. Christina your finial words of what abuse does to us when we are not truly aware is powerful.

542. Christina, thank you for your blog, this is beautiful to read, ‘I was gently reminded of the fact that my body is the greatest gift I have.’ I used to push my body a lot, when I was younger I wanted recognition for being adventurous and I liked to prove that I could do anything, that I was not scared. Now I do not push my body like I used to, I am much more respectful and loving instead and enjoy looking after myself and do not need recognition in the way I did before, my greatest joy now is to feel vital, connected, gentle and present in my body, which to me far outweighs any pleasure from pushing my body with extreme sports etc.

543. It is great and so important to talk about what abuse is, to get in to the details of it, what it feels like in our bodies and the thoughts that go with this. Because the more we understand this part of ourselves, the more we can choose if we want to live with these abusive ways or not.

544. Superb blog Christina and you have summed up so many women’s attitudes towards themselves, self included in this sentence “My body was quite hard, battle-scarred, like a warrior’s body. It had survived a life of numerous car, motorcycle, and sports accidents and injuries. All because I’ve always wanted to be that little step ahead, to be seen as the woman who can do it all… independent, not needing anyone, being respected because I could handle anything.” Oh my God how insane can we be?! And then one day we have the grace to meet Serge Benhayon, a man who relentlessly speaks “up for true love, an inconvenient way to talk or express sometimes. Not everyone likes to hear words of truth and love because it’s confronting to what is seen as normal.” When we truly begin to assess all our choices and the effects of them on our bodies, it becomes apparent that what we regard as normal such as riding motorbikes, heavy partying, taking risks, pushing through things that inside we really don’t want to do, we are living a very abnormal existence. Serge Benhayon lovingly presents us with a choice, to feel and honour the immense love within us and express that in our everyday lives, in how we walk, how we speak, what we eat, how we work, rest and play. It is a revolution in Normal and one that I too am immensely appreciative of, as it restores us to our truly awesome qualities inherent in every single person.

545. Christina this blog was so interesting to read, and to have a sense of the opportunities to grow from your experience of re-visiting a specific type of expression of ‘doing’ albeit in difference to how the body may have been signaling. I find this quite a reminder to me even though I may not jump from a roof or be a stunt actor, that it appears that I can by my own choice revisit past behaviours and patterns that may have been seen as something to be addressed some 12 months earlier. Could it be possible that perhaps there is a correlation between the choice of energy we align with in every moment as we revolve around the sun, and the sense that one may now e.g. a year later, with greater awareness and responsibility be evolving, clearing and perhaps healing a past pattern or behaviour from a different perspective?

546. Great sharing and a deeper realization that when I don’t feel like speaking, but I do out of politeness, is also abusive. I am going to observe when I feel like speaking and when not. And…observe when I honour that and when not. To be continued 🙂

547. It is beautiful to feel the depth of commitment you have connected with in regards to listening to your body.

548. Christina, reading this paragraph brought me to a complete stop with the realisation of the ‘knife edge we walk’ in honouring ourself in full or not. How easy it is to choose to abandon the awareness of the body that has been lovingly re-built over the past few years to be the sensitive vehicle it truly is. No matter how small the action, it is our choice to lose ourselves in the need for recognition etc and ‘cross the border’ once again.
     “So I started working on this and deepening my awareness of what this sensitive vehicle really needs. But still, when I was asked the other day at work to do the stunt, I found myself crossing that border again. I pushed my body again very hard to get the result that was needed. And so – I jumped”.

549. I am amazed sometimes by how easy it is for me to slip into old patterns, which to someone else might seem like nothing, but for me is actually a step backwards. It is actually a great sign of how far I have come to be able to recognise that I feel the difference in my body between when I am supporting myself and when I am not.

550. Christina thank-you, this is a brilliant example of how we push ourselves, as you say jumping from the roof or speaking superficially they are all forms of abuse that the body clocks but the mind chooses to override. Reading your experience,I am filled with appreciation for the wisdom that is offered by our bodies, the loud messages it offers to say stop fighting yourself, imagine if you had honoured yourself in that moment and said no, imagine the reflection this would have had for those around you, in an industry where pushing yourself is the norm.

551. ‘There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking: they are both against the truth of my body, they both need a push to go there.’ It is interesting that we push ourselves to go against ourselves. By becoming more aware we are able to catch this desire to push more easily and then can be more conscious in our choices, the body telling us all the while the consequences.if we choose to listen and then make a respectful choice that honours our bodies and ourselves.

552. Wow Christina, thank you for this honest, profound and deeply exposing blog. I have never done anything as extreme as jumping off a roof, but can relate to every word written here. Prior to attending presentations by Serge Benhayon there was a constant overriding of the signals from my body. This split second choice to renege against what would keep me from harming myself, had not one iota of self-care or honouring the wisdom of my body in it. Worse still, no awareness of this actually being abusive to myself and in total disregard to consequences of how this may impact or affect others. Rather a large Ouch in the irresponsibility of this.
     “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.”

553. Thank you Christina, I enjoyed reading about your unfoldment. I love how you expressed, my body is my “pure and solid partner.” I have found that being connected to my body is like having an unending source of wisdom, it is a text book for life that keeps expanding the more I surrender and listen to its truth.

554. At the end the body takes it all, it obeys our decisions but fortunately it is not extradited completely, it shows us by illness and disease what we have done to it. So either we are separated from it or we honour it and work together. The body knows what is true for us if we but listen to it. What a tragic irony if we don’t.

     1. This is beautifully expressed Sonja, to honour our body and work together with it – this really serves us well and much more than we like to admit.

555. Great exposure of how we abuse ourselves and our body for sake of recognition and to do that it does not need to be dramatic, “There is no difference whether it is jumping from a roof or talking to someone to ‘be nice’ when I truly do not feel like talking”.

     1. Oh yes so true Jonathan, doing ‘nice’ is such a killer . . not unlike jumping off a roof at all accept the jumping is more obviously physically imposing on the body.

556. We are all jumping in our own way. I have never jumped off a building, but there are times when I push my body too hard at work. I never felt it much at times past…perhaps I ought to say more honestly, that I never acknowledged I felt it.
     I am learning, not so much to “look before I leap”, but to feel before I act. Thank God for Universal Medicine and its grand teachings that have reminded me, and so many others, that we are deeply precious and worth caring for at levels as yet not universally acknowledged.

     1. Yes thank god for Universal Medicine’s teachings that we are love and precious, tender, divine beings that are already it, no more need to get somewhere, rather lovingly let ourselves out. I agree too Rachel that we are all leaping off buildings in our own ways; at least with the obvious overrides we can see them clearly, it’s those more subtle ones that I have to really be much more honest with, in order to deepen the love that is so desperately wanting to come out.

        1. They can be so very subtle, as simple as not drinking water at the first moment that our body asks us to drink. Trivial? Only when we have made everything else more important than the most exquisite physiology that makes this beautiful body harmonious.

     2. I love this Rachel, we are all jumping off buildings in our own individual way. What is useful for us is to identify what are all the little things that may not look like jumping off a building, but in affect are our own versions of it. Even the tiniest of things done when in disconnection is abuse and when we truly see this as not OK do we have the due diligence to make the change.

        1. Our eyes are geared to extremes, and we are imprisoned by comparison. As long as we know someone who is worse off we think we are OK or even doing well…Doing better than a person who is completely abusing themselves is not doing well, except in the sickest of accounting systems. When we understand how we have been misled, we can start to sense the subtleness abuse can take…and address it.

     3. What a different world we would be living in if we all accepted that we are deeply precious and sensitive beings and honoured ourselves and our bodies in this way..in fact this IS our Universal Medicine, thanks to the teachings of Universal Medicine.

     4. I love that – “feel before I act.”

     5. Me neither, but I have danced a whole night on high heels while poisoning my body, worked in a push and drive without any respect for my body and the people working with me, used alcohol to take the edge of life and used food to not connect to people….. I could go on and everything feels like jumping off a building. As you say thank God for Universal Medicine!!!!

        1. My feet have duly noted your comment Rachel, having been tormented in stiletto heels too many times to count. All night study “benders” in a complete state of panic were jumps I made all through university.

557. Anything that is not love is abuse, we are in a world where is it normal to dismiss what is truly abusive. Since coming across Universal Medicine I can say that my scale of abuse is much more refined and continuing to do so. If I have to hurt my thumb opening the shampoo bottle that to me now is abusive yet for most that would be seen as no big deal why ‘make a fuss?’. But the thing is that these belittled forms of abuse build a platform for the larger abuses in life to occur. Abuse is abuse and as long as we keep belittling the ‘smaller’ ones we ignore it’s potential to grow. A Japanese Knotweed seed has the potential to cause much devastation if allowed to grow. Thank God for Serge Benhayon presenting that we don’t have to let abuse grow in ourselves or the world around us, our bodies know how to live in a way that is harmonious and it’s our responsibility to let ourselves be with and be that harmony.

558. Wonderfully written Christina thank you… I totally relate to what you are writing about and had a profound experience of this recently … I had a European tour coming up and 2 days before leaving was advised I was in a ‘delicate’ state so I had to ask for help at every airport rather then ‘just getting on with it’ and pushing myself. It was actually a very lovely as every man that I asked for help responded beautifully.

     1. Very beautiful cjames2012, to honour yourself and your body like that rather than over-riding for (what we think is) the sake of others. Yet as you say, people respond beautifully and the support is there when we allow it.

     2. Beautiful testimony of honoring your body cjames. Specifically for men society almost prohibits asking for help, so your sharing is of great importance to everybody to see and embrace the delicateness, tenderness and vulnerability in men.

     3. That is great cjames2012! Great for you and great for those you asked to assist you!
        A healing all around.

559. Beautiful sharing, what we do throughout our day can be either supportive or abusive to our body, and we have the possibility to choose one or the other. There is no one else who will do it for us, we only have our body that will tell what is truly loving or abusive, so we only need to get honest and listen deeply.

560. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are. Nowhere else outside of Universal Medicine was I ever reflected this truth before…” I so agree. Learning from our ‘oops’ moments, be they from jumping off roofs or from ‘accidents’ or illnesses, gives us an opportunity to re-commit to loving ourselves even more deeply.

     1. I do absolutely adore that the antidote to all this normalised abuse is to love ourselves more, let the ‘oops-es’ go and deepen the connection to your breath and your quality. It is so real and so gorgeous.

        1. Agree Vanessa, there are so many theories and concepts and tips and tools to get us out of abuse, but none of those is addressing the root cause and as you say the only true antidote is to love ourselves deeply.

        2. yes, the tools and tips are coming from the same place as the abuse and often only make us criticize ourselves more, or feel like we fail when it does not truly change. Only connecting to the love within and to our bodies.can support us in changing the quality of all that we choose.

561. Thankyou for sharing Christina – great blog to which for one can strongly relate. “Understanding this is my key to truly ask and feel the body first – and listen to the answer on the inside. To not put other people’s demands, or my own beliefs of how I think that I have to be, ahead of how I truly feel to act.” This is gold.

562. I couldn’t agree more. Thank you Christina!

563. This is a great testimony of how hidden the daily self-abuse agenda that is run through our body really is. We have become so accustomed to our abusive lifestyle that we don’t even identify it as abusive; we have reduced abuse to some physical extremes so we can live unquestioned by our lifestyle choices and indulge in the identities of being a “gourmet” a “sommelier” or a “grand connoisseur” with a well developed palate, a great sense for art or literature, et. All the images and beliefs we hold against ourselves are constantly pushing us into self-abusive choices.

     1. Well said Rachel and it exposes how many of our pleasures and hobbies in life are actually abusive to our delicate and sensitive nature. We have purposefully made abuse our way of life to avoid the very clear message coming from our body that tells us who we truly are.

        1. Yes Carolien and all just to maintain our individuality and with this the spirit’s existence. We have to come to the understanding that what we call our lifestyle, what we like and what we prefer is all run by the spirit that uses abuse to maintain its individuality. We choose all those things to stay individual and be identified by those aspects. How crazy is that?

564. What we can learn about life through and with the body is incomparable if we really open up to ourselves.

     1. Too true Eduardo, the most ancient wisdom we will ever find…

     2. Yes I agree Eduardo, and there is never an end to the depth that we can take this relationship with our body and its wisdom to.

565. We can ask our body to go where we want to go or to do for us what we want to do. Our bodies are capable of doing a lot of things and of going to many different places if we ask /order it. So, we go in life doing X or Y and we may not notice that X or Y hurts us deeply. Therefore, we may see no reason not to do it. Yet, the moment the body becomes the reference and not the action itself and we are able to feel how what we always did feels in the body we cannot sustain it any longer. We are able to feel the pain of what we used to call normal. Once we felt that, there is no way back even if we may occasionally fall again.

     1. That is so true Eduardo, when we truly consider the body, there is no way we will abuse it in any way, however when the mind takes over and “wants to get there” or “get this done” or “wants them to get it” in that moment we ignore the body and walk all over it.

566. In a world were we learn from a young age that moderate and severe self-abuse is a common lifestyle and even celebrated as a good life we have blinded ourselves for the fact that living with true respect and care for our bodies is our normal and the way forth. Our bodies are the greatest gift we have, absolutely and only if we stop abusing the very vehicle that holds us in connection to our divine origins we will truly evolve.

     1. Well said Rachel. We have allowed a level of normal to infiltrate and we are indeed blinded to the true way of living that honours and deeply respects our every movement.

     2. Yes absolutely Rachel. We have been served the world on a platter from the totally opposite aspect of what is true and we have swallowed this lie hook, line and sinker. Time to turn it all around again and get back into our body and treat them with the respect and love that will allow us the connection we yearn for most. After all our bodies are our way back to God.

567. Thank you, Christina, and what a great learning for us all to honour our bodies and not be seduced by any need that we have to be doing the “right” thing. The only true thing that we have to do is listen to our bodies.

     1. I agree Elizabeth and doing it right comes very much connected with wanting recognition from others and therefore a need to prove ourselves.

        1. And that can be hard to crack after many years of doing whatever it takes in order to fit in, comply, be seen as strong and cooperative, easy going even – judgment, ridicule and derision are never far behind and it takes guts to stand up for what we know is true for us, no matter how many noses end up being out of joint.

     2. Yes I agree Elizabeth, the “right” thing can be any number of things to different people – all having different ideas about what is “right” but through our bodies we know the one unified truth.

568. Great sharing Christina. The old momentums we have of allowing abuse can only be stopped by us being honest about them. Our body is our guide in coming to this honesty, its messages are loud and clear, we just need to be willing to listen.

     1. Yes it’s about listening to our bodies and being honest about what it is saying, and the willingness to change is what is needed. Our bodies will then be directed on the path of truth.

     2. Agree Katinka, honesty is the first step, but then we have to truly render the spirit naught by exposing our comfort that is holding us in the abuse. The abuse is just a method of the spirit to delay our evolution. We choose abuse to stay in our individuality as the spirit is individuality. Are we willing to let go of it and embrace our universal unity?

        1. Very true Rachel we do have to render the spirit naught and expose the comfort of allowing abuse. My experience is that saying no to abuse in one part of my life, opens up my awareness about the abuse in other parts too. My body now reacts very loudly when I am confronted with abuse. I can no longer deny it, nor do I want to. The comfort of accepting abuse has changed into a huge discomfort (in my body) that I can not live with any more.

569. Wow Christina – I haven’t jumped off a roof before but I can certainly relate to doing many other things over many years that have been over-riding and harming to my body – not only in physical pushing, in relation to sport/exercise etc. but staying up late & way beyond my body feeling tired; over-eating; being all things to all people in order to prove that “I can do it all” (by myself and without any help!). While I have been learning to be much more honouring of my body, I too can also relate to those times when I have gone back into automatic pilot and done something contrary to what I feel in my body – the difference nowadays being that I get the message much quicker and faster than before!

     1. I agree Angela, in many ways its very confirming when the body responds so quickly and loudly, for in feeling more nurtured and cared for when we do “jump off the roof” it is so contra to the way we have been living that our body will not hold back the consequences.

     2. I too have often gone into automatic pilot, choosing familiar patterns of behaviour over what truly supports me. What I am realising is that automatic pilot is synonymous with me separating from my body and shutting down to the natural wisdom it is constantly offering.

        1. Absolutely Jane, and the interesting thing is that no matter how deep a relationship we think we have with our body we can always take it deeper. The body has a depth of wisdom that we are only just beginning to tap into by listening to its constant messages.

        2. So true Kathleen, it is so worthwhile listening to our body. The more we are willing to listen, the greater and deeper the pearls of wisdom we will receive.

        3. Yes Jane and that is because the body is a genius and has registered in it our past, present and future. There is, as you say, pearls of wisdom awaiting us if we are willing to listen and be prepared to then even go deeper. The body tells us everything.

570. This is an awesome article, full of life changing truth and opportunities to reflect. One thing that stands out for me is when you talk about, ‘it came in again in seconds’, ‘it’ being old patterns of performing in life with disregard for your body. This often happens for me, a lapse of care and ‘boom’ I have done something in ignorance and disregard of my body – ‘my pure and solid partner’ in life – which has an impact beyond the immediacy of the event… on others and my body. I am learning to live that there is no ‘off duty’; everything is important and my body is with me all the time, the greatest guide the world has to offer.

     1. Never in ignorance, but absolutely it is so easy to suspend what I know to be true or real and click back into an old groove that takes me off down a path of disregard. It may be something small or big, but either way it always leaves me feeling a bit lost at the end of the journey.

     2. Which awesome words to read tonight! Thanks for your comment and you love in honesty. There’s always so much we can learn from another’s sharing – so much that we can be and get reflected. Let us hear our bodies talk**

571. I can now feel how awful it must have been been for my body by the way I abused it for getting recognition and acceptance, as I have done for a great time of my life. But at that time I was not aware, or to say it more truthfully, I ignored my body in that I was in such a need for that recognition and acceptance that I did not connect with the love that, I have now found, lives within.

     1. Yes, Nico, my body has suffered greatly at the hands of my own disregard and abuse also. Little or no regard for self seemed to be the main theme of my past, pre Universal Medicine days . . . I would do anything for another though, no matter what the cost to the body. Crazy really. Everything was about looking for acceptance and love from outside of myself and never from the connection within. What an absolute blessing it is to able to turn this all around!

        1. A blessing it is indeed Kathleen, to turn our way of living 180 degrees around and start to live the lives we are destined to live, in connection with the universe, with God, with the all off which we are innately part off and belong to. Surrendering to this way of being is the blessing that we can give to our bodies as by allowing it to surrender it to this greater whole we allow to live our lives to our natural state and with that become more of who we are.

        2. Yes Nico I agree, and in saying this when we say ‘no’ to any form of abuse and begin to surrender to the greater whole, this is only the beginning of embarking on the discovery of who we truly are as there is so much more to us than meets the eye.

572. Beautiful blog Christina, although I have never jumped from a roof I have been involved in a car accident where we drove into the water, a very scary situation to be in and what resulted my body to be in shock and in fear of driving nearby rivers or canals for a long time after. But at that time I was not as honouring with my body as I am now, so I pushed myself to do this thing again and by doing so I tried to override and prove my body that there is nothing to be feared about, while, as I can observe now it had all rights to be in fear because of the disconnected way I lived with it.

     1. This is a great point Nico, of course our body must go into fear when we refuse to listen to it or even be fully in it but if that is not bad enough we drive it like a ruthless slave driver from our mind. This means that we recklessly drive our body on without really ever being in the driver’s seat. Yes… I understand the fear and anxiety that this would naturally bring to the body, being driven with this disregard and abuse… I know it in myself as this was how I lived before coming to Universal Medicine.

        1. Yes Kathleen, same for me. Thanks to Universal Medicine I too have come to the understanding that I was living in disconnection to my body, that I rather used it as an object in service for my pleasures instead of having that deep relationship with it that I am building now. The relationship I have now with my body is one with deep respect for the preciousness, delicateness and innate knowing that it is bringing to my life and this relationship asked me to be tender and caring for that precious vehicle of expression for the divine I can now feel my body actually is.

        2. Beautifully expressed Nico, it certainly brings us to a whole new level of responsibility. Our body’s wisdom is our greatest teacher, our most loving parent and our truest friend. It is our responsibility to hold it in the highest regard, pay attention to the messages that it is constantly sending us and honour it deeply. I love your words as they totally encapsulate this so beautifully. Thank you.

        3. It is just palpable before Universal Medicine how much I was disconnected from my body. I was in so much self-abuse and denying my innate ability to feel all that I did naturally so. Universal Medicine offered me a life-changing way that the more you connect to your inner-quality the more you want to live from there.

        4. Absolutely Rik it is true the quality we are in at any given time is the most important thing we ever have to consider. It is certainly a life-changing way to live as this requires us to take full responsibility all of the time.

573. I love the honesty in your exposee of how a fleeting moment’s decision can seriously upset us and throw us off balance for days, Christina. Everything really does count and it takes only a moment to cause severe distress to the body. The only benefit from such experiences is that they indicate what openings in self love remain with us so that we can, from there, seal them once and for all.

     1. Indeed Coleen the body is offering us true consequences, the opportunity to stop, re-evaluate our choices and ponder what we are prepared to yes to.

     2. I agree that the old patterns of behaviour that keep us in the normal but not self-loving way can come in so fast that we can find ourselves doing something almost before we know it. It’s that split second of awareness that makes the difference, but we learn either way, what truly supports us and where our openings are.

        1. And as such it is important to consistently apply a loving way, step by step over and over until this Loving way is our only way.

        2. Yes Josephine, either way we learn and that is so different than I used to live. Making a mistake was terrible and hard to overcome. Now I allow myself to see what has happened, feel what is needed and that’s it. Everything in life is an amazing learning to become the love that we are.

        3. I agree Josephine, and to add further, the way is to stay with yourself 24/7 so that becomes the norm.

     3. I too Coleen have discovered how one decision, that is not honouring of my body, can throw me totally out of balance so very quickly and often for a long period of time. When we begin to live in a way that loves and cares deeply for our bodies any little movement that has no love it stands out so clearly and cannot be ignored, except at our peril.

     4. Yes, at times it is shocking how long a short, intense emotion can reverberate.

     5. True Coleen, everything does count, as is with each loving observation and choice we make to care for our body the greater the foundation is we move from, building a momentum of vitality rather than one destined to fall.

     6. I had something not dissimilar in a way, nothing as ‘exciting’ as doing a stunt, but an induction to a gym. I did what I was asked, and didn’t listen to my body say, ‘that is enough’ and I couldn’t walk properly for 5 days! It was agonising and I didn’t push myself in the sense that the gym people would say was push as I didn’t get breathless or wobbly but I did too much and the consequences were dire. It taught me to really fine tune my listening skills not to outside demands but to my inner knowing and body.

        1. Fine tuning our inner ears is great way to live, I agree, Vanessa – but sometimes overlooked when we go into old habits or give in to external expectations – crazy but true!

     7. It shows how the fleeting moments are not really fleeting at all. Everything counts.

        1. Wise words Annie, you are correct, everything counts. I sport the knowing that the little things count a whole lot. There is nothing more confirming than feeling your innocence when you are performing tasks. It could be simply as waiting in line at the bank enjoying the space you have to just be and waiting patiently in the gloriousness of feeling every thing around you and inside of you as well as how you are choosing to move. Say going for walking, anything really that is what makes it fun.

574. It’s so easy to live with abuse in our life, because it’s what is considered the norm for every day life and not even seen for the abuse that it is. It’s really lovely to see and feel someone beginning to live in a way that is deeply honouring of the preciousness that we actually are. This was of living inspires others to feel that the so called ‘norm’ is not in fact the norm and it is innate in all of us to deeply care for ourselves.

     1. Very well said Danielle – we are all in need of such reflections of preciousness and true honour. May the abuse be at odds with a true way of living for True is the new black.

        1. This is so beautiful said thank you Deborah. It’s the development of a true and honouring way of living that is exposing the amount of abuse that we live in. The deeper our awareness develops of what is true and honouring the more we begin to see what is abuse.

     2. For me it is the more subtle abusive ways that are normal like Christina shares the being nice, not wanting to say no or be ‘awkward’ that are so abusive as every time we say yes to the outside we are saying no to the inside feelings of what is needed at any given moment. These seemingly banal interactions that look actually pleasant and jovial to the on looker are actually abusive if it is not true for the person at the time. Not saying enjoying conversation is wrong ! But rather when we override our true expression to keep the status quo looking peaceful.

     3. Absolutely Mary, right down to how we speak to each other and the body posture we hold and our body movements. These can all be either loving and open or closed and protected, which is abuse. Why are we not reminded this earlier on in life, like in primary school, this would have an amazing impact.

     4. That’s what I have found so liberating about what Serge Benhayon presents – he challenges the norm so we can in turn challenge what is the norm for ourselves. He inspires us to create the space to ask ourselves – what did that feel like? Because so much of life just happens and we rarely stop and feel what impact our choices are having on our body. But when you do – as Christina has just done – and develop a routine of self-care so you can actually feel what is going on for you in your body – we might make different choices.

        1. Absolutely Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine have been an enormous inspiration to truly stop and feel our body and what is really going on. The more I develop my ability to do this and to be truthful about what I’m feeling the more I’m surprised what is actually there to feel.

     5. It is incredible the levels of abuse that we will put up with – be that smoking, alcohol, drugs, intense sport… through to the more subtle abuse that Vanessa refers to, which is equally damaging but maybe not so instantly recognisable or commonly accepted as a form of abuse.

     6. That’s huge Vanessa .. that’s many interactions to ponder on not only with others but with yourself.

575. I hadn’t come across this level of understanding either Christina before Universal Medicine and taking it from theory to practice is the most vital part of the education. By feeling the consequences of your jump, you were able to understand so much more about what your body needs, wants and doesn’t need and want anymore. It is a constant development, paying attention to what we take as normal and questioning it without drama is the first step to redressing the normal that actually harms the body.

     1. It is a very delicate process and quite challenging to know that last years normal will not be the same as this years. Mostly in this life, our normal gets harder and tougher.
        Universal Medicine invites us to go in the other direction, making deepening tenderness and self respect our normal way.
        It teaches us that normal is not a post cemented into the ground, but a constant evolution.

        1. I love what you say here Rachel, that normal is not a post cemented into the ground. Normal can be two different things for two different people but if each persons normal is to go about living and caring for oneself in a much more tender and respectful way then they are essentially the same.

        2. Yes it is challenging and requires a dedication to being honest and aware and then honouring that, which is definitely something I am developing. Beautiful to read others experiences with this evolution and how quickly old patterns can slip back in. We have to be on to ourselves lovingly so every second as it is in a split second we can go into abusive, non-honouring of our bodies.

        3. Extraordinary isn’t it – that abuse of self is so much easier than love and care. How readily we can light up a cigarette, eat a chocolate biscuit and call ourselves an idiot rather than go for a walk in the sunshine, drink some water and appreciate how gorgeous we are – just being who we are.

        4. Exquisite expression – this is very true ‘normal is not a post cemented into the ground, but a constant evolution.’ We trip up in life quickly when we hold to pictures, ideals and a set time and flatline in life for we are spherical in nature and constantly expanding and evolving.

        5. We can try to make a line out of a sphere….but it does not work and we miss out on so very much.

        6. It is baffling to consider how hard we try to fit the sphere into a line or a box – a tendency we have applied to ourselves and life for aeons…to reduce and reduce some more.

        7. ‘It is a very delicate process and quite challenging to know that last years normal will not be the same as this years.’ – the tenderness and understanding in your expression here is breathtaking and melts me.

        8. I love what you share here Dr. Rachel, as it is true: Mostly in this life, our normal gets harder and tougher.” And so we are shown another way opposite to that.. As you say
           ”Universal Medicine invites us to go in the other direction, making deepening tenderness and self respect our normal way.”
           This way I have only just started, and I must say the first leg I had put out in the water is the best step ever, as I know I will truly return to who I am. And so I am learning to let go of all the old ways I had held for so long. We are never to hold things for us, but always to let go and move on.. And so now we can..

        9. ‘last years normal will not be the same as this years’ – Gold Rachel! It is a forever evolving and deepening relationship with ourselves and life and one that bucks the trend of getting tougher. What I do know through my own experience is that as I deepen my tenderness and love for myself I in fact become stronger and more powerful in myself.

        10. Very true Dr Rachel the skys the limit. It makes you wonder why we have a sky that has no end .. .. ..

        11. And a sky that is ever changing in response to something so grand and finely balanced we cannot conceive it with our minds.

        12. Yes, and this is quite unique, perhaps this is the challenge. We prefer the cemented post because we know how to deal and behave with that, we can check out in a way and let things pass us by. Evolution requires us to be present and responsive which means we need to engage and can’t sit back and numb.

        13. It creates an entirely false sense of safety, one that ignores that in every moment the Universe is moving on..everything has changed.

        14. Well said Rachel, Universal Medicine has taught me that living in connection to my tenderness and honouring it in everything that I do is normal and it’s a great reflection to offer to the world.

        15. Normal is what we make it!

     2. I agree Lucy, it is very honest for Christina to allow herself to feel what the jump did to her body, admitting this is a great starting point to make different choices. When we do not admit to what we do to our bodies and allow ourselves to actually feel that, there is no foundation to change anything.

     3. I agree Lucy. It is a constant refining of what it is that truly supports our bodies and what does not and this is different for everyone. There is no one size fits all, no rule book.

        1. That is what I have loved Lee, it is so personal. We have to feel this for ourselves, what our body needs, what our body is asking for. We have each had different experiences and will have different calls on our body and our lives so although we can have similar tools, how we apply them will differ from person to person.

     4. So true Marika and one for us all to remember and appreciate.

     5. I agree Marika, there is a lot to appreciate when we start to introduce self-care and loving choices into our everyday living and look back and see the way we used to abuse our bodies, the more we appreciate this the more normal it becomes.

     6. Yes Lucy, your comment reminds me that everything we do either heals or harms – as Serge Benhayon has presented. It’s that simple, that black and white. It’s a choice.

576. “The only truthful ‘making it right’ is to feel first and let love be the fuel that runs my engine” – this is so true. It took me a while to realise sometimes I could be thinking that I was honouring what I was feeling when in fact it was already based on some conditions that I had cast, and not love.

     1. Yes, it is embarrassing how much our mind and how easily it can be misled. It is quite a humbling feeling knowing that you are absolutely right and finding out, no, that was completely wrong.

        1. I know the feeling – that voice is so convincing, backed up by what is normal and expected and yet, it goes against our true nature and in the final analysis – is wrong.

     2. True Fumiyo. Any pre- ‘thought’ of what is honouring is a dead giveaway that it is not coming directly from our body, but yet another ideal or image of what we ‘should’ do.

        1. True Kylie, when you start thinking about something you are gone. Long before ‘thinking’ truth has already been felt.

     3. Yes Fumiyo, I too have had times where I thought I was honouring what I was feeling, but was only carrying out intentions that I had previously set in motion, which suited me at the time, but were not love.

     4. Great point Fumiyo more often than not we can make something ‘right’ based on a belief we have rather than digging further beneath the surface to see that perhaps this ‘right’ is not truly right after all. What Christina brings to light is the fact that developing a self-loving relationship with self first is key. From here we can then truly begin to feel if what appears as the ‘right’ thing to do is actually true or right for us at all.

577. You expose so much here Christina. Doing our job properly or ‘right’ would seemingly be the way we are supposed to do our job but at what cost? What you are offering is to consider a deeper level of self love and honouring of our body that encompasses every area of our lives and that offers not just ourselves but also others the opportunity to consider how they are with their bodies also.

     1. When I used to do kids holiday camps I always had this idea that you had to always put the kids first no matter what. At the end of the week I would always be tired and exhausted. I then had some staff who did this differently, who while on camp made space for themselves- prepared meals that would support them, had a shower at a reasonable time and worked out between them who would supervise the kids, etc. It was just simple things that didn’t look that different to what I was doing but they weren’t running their bodies with the burden of anxiety that they needed to do everything for everyone else first. Their experience of the camp was a different momentum to mine. At first I got frustrated by this or thought it was a little too precious but in time I learnt that this was the way as by the end of camp I was often too tired to give anymore when they weren’t- so this was a good learning.

        1. Kristy your comment takes me back to a time when I was a Brownie Leader of 22 little girls on a ‘Pack Holiday’. I too had the belief back then that everybody else came first and I too suffered the exhaustion of not listening to my body – quite a wake-up call really. It just took me a very long time to wake up to truth. If I was in that position again, I would indeed do it differently, and take heed by listening to the needs of my body first and the actual needs of these 22 little bodies that I was responsibile for instead of adhering to a belief system of the importance of goals and achievements ahead of our body’s need for harmony and stillness as has been shared with us at the Universal Medicine presentations. I might say we had amazing fun but on reflection there was a price that was paid that was not really necessary and that was an exhausted Pack Leader.

     2. Great point you make here Penelope – what Christina offers us is an opportunity to deeply reflect on the intent behind our choices and as you say perhaps consider the possibility that being more self-loving is a more truthful and loving way to be with both ourselves and others.

     3. So true Penelope. Could it be possible that in loving and honoring our body what is true in our work will flow from this? It may look different to what we had thought was “right” but it will actually be true and hold a depth of quality that would not have otherwise been present.

578. Great blog Christina. “The abuse happens anytime we are not truly aware of ourselves and others. It happens anytime we are not living the true love we are.” And how easy is it to pretend that we didn’t feel it when we did. Wanting life to be a certain way, does not make it so.

     1. Exactly, ‘wanting life to be a certain way, does not make it so’… but we can absolutely fool ourselves trying.

        1. Yes Kylie, we do fool ourselves trying it becomes our way of life, until the next thing is presented. The real issue is we can spend a whole lifetime that is setup to keep going as Christina presents, if others are doing it with you and being part of the same image you are all fooled to believing you have it. Thats why when you do step out of the ‘norm’ you feel alone but you are not because it is the most glorious thing to feel the love for yourself grow and deepen.

        2. …or at least attempt to fool ourselves. Our bodies reveal all in the end.

     2. Great point Maree, we think we can drive our life from our heads, but truly we cannot as there are so many factors that are uncontrollable, simple things like the weather, death, someone else’s response, etc. However we do not give up trying to control what is impossible to control and this attitude is very abusive to the body and people around us.

     3. I can feel the pressure and thoughts you would have in this situation, I can relate to it in other situations I have experienced. I appreciate your sharing and the observations and impact you noticed it had- thank you.

     4. Absolutely Maree. It is so easy to ignor that little impulse that something is not quite right and when we do ignor, it then becomes quite obvious in how we feel after the fact. Thank you for sharing this very revealing blog Christina.

        1. Its a good point Lee – we ignore the impulse but we can feel it. Then once we have followed through I so often act surprised, not wanting to admit that I over rode the initial question because I was way too invested in wanting to do whatever the situation demanded.

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