Category: MENTAL HEALTH

Relationship Advice

For all the relationship advice I have received over the years, I can safely say that little of it served me well; if anything it contributed only to the fact that I stayed in relationships that I really ought to have ended long before I did. In fact some of them I never should have started!

I do recall my mother’s not-so-sage advice when I was embarking on my first serious relationship where she said, “try living with three different men before you decide to marry as you don’t really know someone until you live with them!” Even when she told me that something in me thought, “But what if I decide it should have been the first or second one and l’ve already moved on!” Continue reading “Relationship Advice” →

House Clearing with Purpose 

Energetic Responsibility at Home – Spaciousness & Simplicity or Clutter & Complication?

Imagine you feel you know all there is to know about yourself, then something happens to remove the blinkers from your eyes and totally exposes how you’re truly living. This is my story.

I’ve known for a few years that I’ve wanted to do something to my flat, but I didn’t know where or how to start. I had lived in the same place for over 25 years: a lovely one bed in London in a neighbourhood I’ve come to love. On the surface there appeared to be order, but was there?

Continue reading “House Clearing with Purpose “ →

My Relationship with Writing

Ever felt that it has been hard to sit down and write something that you feel within to express, but the actual writing process (whether it be by pen or keyboard) leaves you feeling agitated and stressed?

This has been my recent experience – feeling a strong impulse and beautiful expression within me to be shared, yet once sitting at the table or desk to commence writing I quickly observed that my shoulders were tight, my hands were hard and I was caught in a drive to get it done that did not feel very nice. To make things worse, because I so desperately wanted the words and process to flow, I judged myself harshly and this left me feeling deflated and exhausted! Continue reading “My Relationship with Writing” →

My Evolution as a Woman

Here’s a sentence that you may have to read twice: “for most of my life I have been aware that when certain people have shared something good that has happened to them, I have felt disappointed – and when they have shared something bad that has happened to them, I have felt mildly elated.” My suggestion that you read this sentence twice is not because it’s a difficult sentence to understand, but more so because it’s difficult for most of us to admit.

I have had these feelings since the age of about 9 and can pinpoint the exact moment that my body first registered the physical stab in the gut that accompanies the jealousy that underpins these feelings. Continue reading “My Evolution as a Woman” →

Breakdown or Breakthrough?

In a world obsessed with the pursuit of happiness – an ever-elusive destination we live in a constant search of, but never seem to arrive at – having feelings that your life is moving in the opposite direction can be a very scary prospect. But is there something very necessary, honest and real about going through an apparent breakdown that could actually be an opportunity for a breakthrough?

Learning to cope, to be resilient and ‘keep it all together,’ are skills we’re taught to develop as children, with boys in particular feeling the pressure to ‘toughen up’ and ‘soldier on.’ Whilst these can appear like they’re serving us in the world and bringing the acceptance we’re desperately seeking, could this lack of expression actually be holding us in a prison of suffering, when being vulnerable could be the key to emotional freedom? Continue reading “Breakdown or Breakthrough?” →

The Magic of the Mundane – Appreciation is the Key

In our world, it is common for us to appreciate almost exclusively the ‘big ticket’ items in life – the new job, house or car, the unanticipated windfall, the volunteers who help out in a disaster, the player who scores the winning goal for the team. It is, in my experience at least, rare for us to appreciate what we deem as insignificant or mundane events like enjoying a lovely meal or just a cup of herbal tea, for example. Such moments are relegated to the status of being merely incidental and instrumental in our pursuit of the big-ticket items.

Even rarer is it for us to appreciate qualities, those of others and ourselves, the exceptions involving social rituals like death, marriage, and graduation. Rather, our focus tends to be more on achievements and material acquisitions. Continue reading “The Magic of the Mundane – Appreciation is the Key” →