Category: – Self Worth & Acceptance

From ‘Don’t be a Nuisance’ to Claiming Myself – an Ongoing Journey

My parents ran the village shop and Post Office in a rural community. We did stock a very wide range of goods, but this was more than just an emporium – it was the centre of village life. We had a coke-burning stove and in the winter the farmers would come and warm their hands on the chimney pipe. There were so many ‘characters’ – those who would come several times a day and buy just one item each time; those who would come just before closing time and engage one of my parents in conversation; those who would ignore the shop hours totally and come to our back door!

This all seemed very unfair to me, but the response I got was always the same – to be grateful to these people because their money put the food on my plate. It seemed as though my parents lived in fear of offending (and more particularly my brother and I offending) a customer. What appeared to me to be grave injustices were swept under the carpet of duty and inevitability.

Continue reading “From ‘Don’t be a Nuisance’ to Claiming Myself – an Ongoing Journey” →

From A False Foundation of Abuse to a True Foundation of Self-Love

This is my story of a life of abuse… and where it began…

Learning to Trust and Rely on No-One…

As a young child I grew up with only my father and one of my younger sisters, as my mother moved interstate one day with my oldest and youngest sisters and her new husband, unbeknownst to me and my sister. At that stage of my life I was attending primary school around the corner from her house. On the day she moved, I was about 8, I felt very strongly to go to her home. When I got there I saw a removalist truck pulling out with one of my sisters sitting in the front and my mum’s car driving away down the road. I was devastated. I knew this was goodbye and I lost two of my best friends and my mum from right under my nose.

From this I learnt a lot: I decided it was best not to listen to my feelings as they may lead me into great pain, and that just because I was born into a family this did not give me the right to expect to be a part of it, and that you can trust and rely on no-one because at any point in time they can disappear right from under you.

Continue reading “From A False Foundation of Abuse to a True Foundation of Self-Love” →

Communicating with, and Talking to People – No longer Calibrating my Expression

I am becoming aware that when I am talking to people I adjust the way I express and communicate according to how I feel the listener will receive my words.

When I’m talking, I often hold back and don’t fully express what I want to say because I am afraid of the person’s response, or how they may feel, or what they will think of me – this last one in particular is a big one for me. Continue reading “Communicating with, and Talking to People – No longer Calibrating my Expression” →

Why Diets don’t Work – and Neither does Tidying Up

I could never work out why diets don’t work for me – and neither does tidying up. Isn’t it funny how we try to be perfect? And how much we don’t like the way we are or the way we live and are constantly striving to be better?

I was overweight for years – unhappy with just about everything but numbing it with eating, eating, and more eating. I tried diets that didn’t work and went to weight watchers’ classes time after time but the weight always came back. Continue reading “Why Diets don’t Work – and Neither does Tidying Up” →

Pleasures of Life or Distractions

Several years ago, there came a day when I realised that I was just going round and round in circles in my life, and for all my ‘doing’ and ‘searching’, nothing ever changed. I had not improved or bettered myself, because that was the belief I held: I had to do better, I had to improve myself, I had to push, I had to do, do, do. It was this belief that kept me feeling that I was not enough as I was, and kept me in the search of looking outside of myself for the answers. Continue reading “Pleasures of Life or Distractions” →

The Power of Choice

I would like to share an experience I had a while back that made me realise just how powerful our choices can be.

I was in London for the weekend to attend the Esoteric Developers Women’s Group, a group that explores what it is like to live as a woman in today’s society. The group presents Women’s Health from a different and non-imposing perspective where taking responsibility for our own wellbeing and our choices is part of the key topics presented.  Continue reading “The Power of Choice” →