Category: RELATIONSHIPS

Changing the Reference Point in My Life

by Vicky Cooke, Customer Service Advisor, London, UK

With all the lies and ill-allegations made towards Serge Benhayon, the Universal Medicine Team and many of us recently, I have noticed something. When I was younger and something didn’t feel right, I used to say it didn’t feel right. An example would be listening to the news and politicians talking, and thinking that sounds like a load of crap, saying this to my parents, and wondering why people who to me only felt like they were in it for themselves, seemed to be deciding our fate. Why was it just up to these few people, when clearly all the decisions and actions they were taking and making didn’t seem to be for all, or improving anything?

As the years went by I stopped questioning and started accepting. Feeling that I didn’t matter, that one voice doesn’t count, that everyday people cannot make a change and we had to let others decide our fate and just get on with it. Only recently have I come to deeply realise that by just accepting this, not only did I give up on life – I also buried my voice of reason and questioning deep within and let it be silenced. Continue reading “Changing the Reference Point in My Life” →

Abusive Relationships: Breaking the Vicious Cycle

When I was living in a very abusive relationship I let the fear of the unknown keep me captive in the relationship: I would rather have faced extreme abuse than take a step into the unknown, and end the relationship. Looking back several years later, this now seems crazy.

So, in this scenario I allowed fear to run a program of thoughts through my mind: it was this fear-based program that actually supported me in making the choice to live in a very unsafe manner by continuing on in the abusive relationship. From this experience and others, I have come to see that when we put a lot of time and energy into these thoughts, we can actually make it our physical reality by creating situations that support and prove the ideas/fears in our head to be physical facts. Now this is scary… Continue reading “Abusive Relationships: Breaking the Vicious Cycle” →

Inspired to Look Deeper: Making Love versus Sex

I have just read a fantastic piece by Kyla Plummer about love making versus sex on another blog (Women In Livingness) – titled Sex, Drugs… and Making Love. It took real courage and self-love for Kyla to speak up about her past relationships, sex life and the recklessness and abuse in such detail.

After reading the article I felt the deep sadness, shame or guilt that I had about my past sex life and relationships as a young woman. There was a part of me that blamed myself for the terrible empty relationships and experiences that I had, but from Kyla’s post I felt how I too don’t need to be ashamed or self-beating about the past. Yes, I chose this and I need to take responsibility for my choices and look at why I made these, but also need to consider that at the time there was no other way shown to me.

Reckless, irresponsible and empty sex and relationships were what my friends, older girls at school, older women and mothers around me were doing, and what the movies and magazines showed me. It was all about the urgency, performing, pleasing and positions, or the romance with candlelight, music and an open fireplace. But all of this left an empty or dissatisfied feeling, in turn leading to the need for either more sex, exciting scenes or locations or a ‘better’ partner. Continue reading “Inspired to Look Deeper: Making Love versus Sex” →

Inspired by Serge Benhayon: From Marriage Breakdown to True Responsibility

For the last 34 years I have been in a relationship with the same man. Our first two years together were quite harmonious and supportive… but then we got married. Once the contract was signed everything changed, and we started to live out the roles and expectations we had learnt from our individual perceptions and experiences. I became the responsible wife who organised our lives and he became the provider, even though we both worked full-time.

The playing of these roles was further reinforced when we became parents. Over time, and with the birth of seven (7) children, a wedge developed between us. From my perspective, I never truly felt supported and deeply resented that I was left to carry out most of the parenting and domestic organisation. From my husband’s perspective, he felt I should be grateful that he earned a reasonable living and did some jobs around the house. Continue reading “Inspired by Serge Benhayon: From Marriage Breakdown to True Responsibility” →

Returning Home to the Scene of the Crime: Living with my Mother & Alzheimer’s

by Kim Olsen, Bachelor of Chemical Engineering, Salesperson, Warwick, Queensland, Australia

About three and a half years ago I felt to return to my home town and live at my mother’s house. It has been an interesting journey. She is now 85 and getting frailer and fuzzier with Alzheimer’s disease. When I arrived she had just had bowel cancer and was getting regular infections and bronchitis. Over the last two years I’ve taken over preparing the evening meal for us, as my mother hasn’t been coping well. It has always been a balancing act between encouraging my mother to do things for herself and doing things for her. She is happy for people to do everything for her. Although she is frailer and more forgetful, her general health has improved.

We have a difference in the way we live. For me it is a learning about being. Being who I am from my feelings, that for me is about being present to myself. For her, it seems to be about knowing, having and being seen (identified). Continue reading “Returning Home to the Scene of the Crime: Living with my Mother & Alzheimer’s” →

The Six Stages of ‘Becoming Me’ (so far anyway): Part 1

by Joel L (Australia)

Across my life I have spent time ‘looking for something’. I could not always say what this ‘something’ was and this search has been sporadic, moving from being quite active to ignoring this topic altogether.

Over the past eight years, I have been coming closer to this ‘something’ than ever before. I am sure there is much more to discover, but this something was ME… the real me.

There have been at least six stages of becoming me, and here are the broad brush strokes: Continue reading “The Six Stages of ‘Becoming Me’ (so far anyway): Part 1” →